Special KJck-iit-the-ASP Section Inside T*hf
Slate University ol New York at Albany
Tuesday, March 18, 197S
Whalers Clinch Dennis Elkin Cup
by Nathan Safauit
In the A.M.I.A. Floor Hockey
Finals Sunday, the Whalers defeated
the Colonists 4-0 to win the 2 out of 3
series and the vaunted Dennis S.
Elkin Cup that goes with it. The
Whalers, losers in game I by a 4-1
margin, edged the Colonists 3-2 to
even the series and set up Sunday's
rubber match.
After 2 scoreless periods of
balanced play, a Jay Wasscrman
d r o p p a s s skipped over a
' defcnscman's stick and into center
zone where the ensuing race lor the
puck was won by Whaler Mike Constiintinc (the scries MVP). Constantino broke in alone, and fired it past
goalie Jeff Black to give the Whalers
a 1-0 lead just 33 seconds into the
period.
Cliff Gcrbcr made it 2-0 at 9:19 on
a 35 foot: wrist shot and Bill Jonat
followed with a short-handed goal
30 seconds later. Brad Scid closed
out the Whaler scoring. Goalie Don
Amico starred in the nets for the
Whalers, stopping 23 shots.
In game one, the Colonista open-
ed the scoring in the first period on a
Jay Wasscrman breakaway goal,
only to have the Whalers even
matters when Gerber fed Seid in
front of the net at 0:28 of period two.
The third period was all Colonists,
as goals by Wasserman and two by
Tom Herman broke it open.
Wasserman's came at 0:39 when
Whaler goalie Don Amico failed to
clear a lose puck in the crease and
had it taken off his stick and fired in.
Herman scored 4 minutes later on a
slot feed from Wasscrman, and
again at 12:51 on a perfect one-two
from Bob Pape.
Game II was scoreless after one
period, and remained that way until
6:30 of period two, when John
D'Agostino led fed Pape on a
breakaway. Pape faked right, Amico
went down like a ton of bricks, and
Pape fired a backhander in from the
left side.
The Whalers came back 9 seconds
later on a 30 footer by Jonat, and
moved ahead at 12:41 when Mike
Razzcnhoffer tipped in Seid's wrist
shot.
Two minutes into period 3, Neil
Geschwin made it 3-1 on an unassisted breakaway goal. Pape
brought the Colonists back at 12:02,
but the chance to tie was missed
seconds later when Amico made a
sliding save on Wasscrman.
All things considered, the first
year of A.M.I.A. Floor Hockey
competition was an unqualified
success. Fourteen teams participated
and no forfeits occurred. Injuries,
the bane of all A.M.I.A., activities
were virtually nonexistent. An ALL
Star game and Showdown one-ononc contest arc planned after the
Spring Vacation -- watch for
details.
nam
The opening tap In Sunday's League II Championship game between
Herkimer and Mama's Children.
Championships
hale
Mints An Ail-American
by Nathan Salum
Slate University at Albany's Larry
Mims, a 142 pound senior, closed his
collegiate wrestling career by
finishing third in the recent NCAA
Division 111 Wrestling Championships at John Carroll University
in Cleveland. O., and garnering his
second All-American title in two
years.
Mims, who wrestled for a 29-4-1
overall record this year, defeated
Mike Flamingo, Mansfield Stale
College, 9-4 to grab the third place
finish and the All-American title.
Last year the 5'7" sociology major
finished fifth.
To cam a chance lor the finals
Mims decisioned four wrestlers, in-
eluding a 5-0 victory over Mike
Kassab of Wilkes College in overtime. He was defeated in the semifinals by Coe College's Nick llobbs
9-3.
Mims was the mainstay of coach
Joe (iarcia's wrestling squad for the
past lour years finishing with a
career mark of 79-12-3. "He'll be a
tough man to replace," Garcia said,
"because we could always count on
him for steady winning wresiling. He
had an outstanding year, but all of
his years here have been outstanding."
Tom Horn (Lalhan, N.Y.), who
had wrestled most ol the year al If>7
pounds, went into the nationals at
his normal weight ol 158. He was
defeated in the first match.
Trivia Contest Results
I he A.M.I.A. Sports Trivia Contest was won last night by the yearn
of Mike Curwin, Denny Small, and
Glenn Roselt with a score of 545
points. Runner up team was that of
Mark Holt, Mike Piekarski,and Jell
Greenfield. Third place went to
Mike Pines, Steve Josephcr, and
Brian Wasser,
'The winners received a $50 gift
certificate to Jacks' Oyster House,
compliments of Jacks and A.M.I.A.
VOL. L S I NO 17
MARCH SO, 1S7S
Second Presidential Candidate Visits Campus
Spring
Sports
Preview
Thursday
Dave Kenllne set for a 10 footer in the Mud-Kuzorches League III Championship Game Sunday.
STATE UNIVERSITY O F NEW YORK AT ALBANY
by Nathan Salunt
111 A.M.I.A. Championship
basketball games played Sunday.
Mama's Children blew Herkimer oil
the court 50-19 to win League II:
Med edged the Kuzorches 39-37 on 1
late free throws In lorn Schauer:
and One Last fry turned hack the
Newcomers 44-28 to win League IV.
Mud League I Championship was
won by Panama Kcd two weeksago.
lorn DeHloistossed in 19points.S
in the first half, as Mama's Children
opened a 15-0 lead and were never
headed. Herkimer failed to score in
the first quarter, as the Children
played a successful run and gun
offense mixed with an impenetrable
lull court press. Mark Stenclick had
10 points and Bob Polachek added 9
to back up DeBIois, Mark Skulnick
scored 9 of Herkimer's 19.
lorn Schauer converted 2 free
throws with I second remaining in
the game to break a 37-37 tie and
give Mudits win over the Kuzorches.
Neither team was able to open more
than a 5 point lead in this, the closest
ol championship matchups in three
years. Schauer totaled 12. while
game high honors went to Dennis
O'Reilly with 14 for the Kuzorches.
One Last Iry, led by Kill
Wainwriglu's'2 points, romped over
the Newcomers, largely thanks to a
12-1 scoring spree to open the second
hall. I he game, close in the first
period was won on the foul line,
where One Last I rj slim IK lor 15.
while the New comers managed just 4
ol Id. Jell Davidson led the losers in
scoring with 9 points.
by Betty Stein
"So, what's going on at this campus?" asked Alfred Rollins, who yesterday became the second Presidential candidate to make an appcaranc
at SUNYA, under the protective
shroud of the Search Committee,
"What are the issues?"
Dressed in a maroon blazer and
striped shirt, with tan doubleknit
pants and a matching tie, Rollins
leaned forward frequently as he
spoke. Ins forehead wrinkling while
lie responded to and posed
question during the early morning
meeting with students.
"I would like to be President it's
a lot of fun." he said jokingly, though
he insisted he is "not seeking" the
job. rather he is allowing himself lo
he considered for it. Currently Executive Vice President at theUniversity of Vermont, Rollins expressed the
feeling that it is lime lor him to move
on; "It's an administrative cycle.
After a while you get tobecone part
of the problem instead ol the solution. I've l,;en there as long as 1
should." he said, adding. "I do not
want to stay on to the point where I'll
be an embarrassment."
His voice is low and airy. His dark
hair is sprinkled only lightly with
gray, a fact thai would tend to belie
his 53 years if not for the flabby chin
and receding hairline.
"The top priority is teaching" said
Rollins, when asked what he feels the
main goals of a University Center
should be, "It's something everyone
in the University must do."
At least partially explaining this
view may be th fact that Rollins has
spent most of his 26-year academic
jreer as a teacher. For 15 years he
taught History al SUNY New Paltz,
later moving on to Binghamlon,
where he eventually became chairman of the Hisloiy Department. In
1907 he left the SUNY system to
accept his position al the University
of Vermont, which he describes as
being relatively small compared to
SUNYA.
Rollins outlined what he called
"two distinct lines of communication."One is the administrative kind,
and the other is the more informal
type. "1 think a good deal of the
President's time should be spent
developing that other line of communication," he said, emphasizing
the need for a sense of communily.
"One of the biggest problems here is
that the University is caught up in a
great amount of bureaucratic
process." Rollins repeatedly expressed a desire lo avoid "mass
production of students."
Rollins feels that a University
Center must serve local as well as
national needs. Accordingly, he
says, a university President should
spend 50% of his time on campus
and 50% off. "though, in one sense,
100% of one's time should be spent
fenty
Alfred Robblns of the University of Vermont met with students yesterday.
developing a sense of mission for the
university." He spoke out in favor of
the continuing education program,
indication thai this is the type of
program that he thinks will help
develop important tics lo the local
community.
"Faculty and students arc attracted to a University lor very subtle reasons," said Rollins. A faculty
that brings national attention to a
university is what he calls "a valuable
asset." Referring to Ihc fact thai
many people are attracted to the University of Vermont because of its
ideal location for winter sports, he
quipped,
"You don't have the
CSEA Stages Demonstration; Demands Wage Hike
by Randi Tolcr
Twenty thousand members of the
Civil Service Employees Association
flooded the streets of Albany Tuesday morning, demanding a pay raise
for 147,000 stale workers.
The protestors, carrying placards
such as "Do You Wanna Eat Rotten
Meat?" and "There is No 'Care' in
C a r e y " , staged the largest
demonstration in the history of the
state capitol. "The largest previous
demonstration had been held in 1970
when an e s t i m a t e d
15,000
demonstrators protested the U.S. invasion of Cambodia.
Theodore Wenzl, president of the
CSEA advocates that Governor
Hugh Carey is not bargaining in
good faith. Wenzl reported that state
negotiators had yet to come up with
any firm money offer since
negotiations began last January.
March 31, thedate that the final year
Schm'ffcr Tournament
The league champions will be
competing in the A.M.l.A.Schaeffer
Tournament Representative Selection Tournament starling this week,
to determine who will represent
SUNYA at the lournanient to be
held at Siena College in mid-April.
The selection tournament will be a
double elimination with the opening
round matchups as follows: Panama
Red versus One Last "fry, and Mud
versus Mama's Children.
W.I. R. A. News
b) Cathy Dower
Alter the first month of W.l.R.A.
Women's Basketball, Old Irving is in
lust place in Division A with a 5-0
record, one game ahead of the
Playersal4-I. Division of B'sleaders
a re the Jock cues with a M) mark, the
felines are second at 4-1.
The W.l.R.A. Basketball season
will extend through April 17, with
each team playing a total ol 7 games
in its season.
Women's intramural Softball is
scheduled lo begin Wednesday,
April 9. Captian's meeting will be eld
Tuesday, April 8. Check the intramural bulletin hoard outside
CC356 for the time and location.
Soltball rosters are due by Friday,
March 21. It is advisable that any
ALL-WOMEN
teams play
W.l.R.A. soltball rather than
A.M.I.A. Leaue 111 soltball. Anyone
interested in officiating women's
soltball (male or female officials are
acceptable) is asked to contact Cathy
Dower at 457-4300.
Rollins was handed a copy of ACT,
skiing, but you do have significant
assets and thoseoughl to be preserv- the SUNYA faculty evaluation
booklet produced soley by students.
ed."
Rollins expressed reservations, Tie quickly expressed his approval of
however, about concentrating too it, saying that it serves many impormuch on a distinguished faculty, say- tant functions.
One important function, hesaid.is
ing, "1 have some doubts about the
star system. I think SUNY'sgoinglo that of a consumer guide. He put it
be belter off lapping Ihc in people." this way: "You're specialists in what
Rollins also questioned the feasibili- you want, and you're specialists in
ty of mainlining outstanding quality what you thhnk is being done for
in all departments. He feels that you." He emphasized the imporsome decision must inevitably be tance of such operations being totalmade as to which areas will receive ly in the hands of the students; "It
has to be student done. This sort of
highest priority.
During the course of the meeting, thing doesn't work unless student inwhich about 15 students attended, terest makes it work,"
Twenty thousand members of I M Civil Services Employees
Association gathered In Iront ol the Capitol yesterday demanding a
pay raise for state workers.
of the union's three year contract
goes into effect, is drawing near and
the CSEA leaders are quickly
organizing retaliation.
Ronald Smith, a chairman ol one
of the union's institutional service
units, told the crowd "If the governor doesn't come through by March
31 then he hasn't seen anything, and
I'm talking about a slrike."
Wenzl said that the union is seeking a pay raise of about 12 per cent to
compensate for the increase in the
cost of living. They also seek improved health insurance coverage,
an agency shop which would require
stale employees who are not
members of the CSEA to pay the
equivalent ol union dues, and
changes in disciplinary procedurss.
I he union is also unhappy with
cutbacks and reorganizations ol
slate agencies wh. i have resulted in
the firing of 1,084 state employyes;
and with Carey's- '.ana lo turn over
job safety and .u-.il 'ispection
programs lo the federal government.
I he mass of demonstrators
overwhelmed the Capitol building
and the park. Representatives from
various regions throughout New
York Stale shouted words of encouragement over a large P.A.
system and pleaded for unity from
the crowd. Their shouts were
answered with vigorous cheers and
applause, and the state employees
seemed determined to sland up for
their demands. One speaker
threatened to lake the Capital apart
stone by stone if their demands were
not met by the Governor.
A rock band was set upon the
steps of the capitol and the group
played tunes of protest with lyrics
that at limes attacked Governor
Carey. Governor Carey was the
main target the Civil Service
Employees Association was Tiring at
on Tuesday. The crowd chanted "We
want Carey, We want Carey." but
the Governor never did come forth
to address the irate demonstrators.
The demonstration eventually
became an almost festive gathering
as the protestors from all over New
York Slate ate their paper bag
lunches, sipped wine in the park, or
frequented the many bars inthc
capitol district. Towards the end of
the afternoon demonstrators could
he seen tippling inlooneof the 400
buses thai were lineu up over five city
blocks.
I he union said that the
demonstrators would receive lull nay
for the day. because they look -.'.flier
vacation lime or one of the five "personal leave" days thai the stale
allocates to them annually.
After the demonslration a group
ol delegates met and approved a
resolution authorizing the CSEA
leadership lo poll members on what
siclion should be taken n e x t including a strike.
The laylor Law makes it illegal
for any public employees to go on
strike.
* < * < •
Myskania 76 Forming in Spring
by Audrey Seldman
Myskania 1975 is well and active
at SUNYA, and getting ready to
welcome Myskania 1976.
Myskania is the traditional honor
society for student leaders formed in
1917 to "unify the student body,
motivate the extracurricular activities, to act as the student government, to uphold college tradition,
and to act as a mediary between the
faculty and the students," according
to a 1965 history of the group.
Its role at the University has
changed with the times. At first it
was a group of eleven completely
chosen by the faculty. Among ilsaccomplishments were revitalization.
of Stale College News, then the
school paper, establishing class
rivalry, organizing activities day and
various clubs. Myskania was first
elected entirely by the student body
in 1946. In 1957 the group drew up
the Constitu.tion for Student
Association. In 1965 Myskania
assumed the role of a senior
honorary, relinquishing its Judicial
functions. Its files reveal an exciting
account of how student life has
changed at SUNYA.
As the guardian of tradition
Myskania carries on the duties including the Opening Convocation
and Candle-Lighting Ceremony and
Torch Night. These events may be
changed to increase student participation. This year Myskania
started a new tradition in recognizing December graduates with a
dinner and reception.
Myskania 1976 nomination forms
will be available April 7. This year,
according to the Myskania Constitition, all nomination forms will be
reviewed. All nominated students
will be on the ballot; however those
students who Myskania sees as
qualified will be "recommended" to
the student body for election. The
major criteria are leadership and
contributions to the University. The
Constitution also lists reliability,
good judgement, initiative and
scholarship. Myskania, however, is
not an academic organization.
Myskania will then publish • list of
s t u d e n t s a l o n g with their
qualifications.
This year's Myskania served as advisors or consultants to administrators on policy, hiring or
brainstorming decisions. The
CAMBODIA, (AP) Insurgent forces kept heavy shelling pressure on Ncak
Myskania member interacts in Luong, 32 miles Southeastof Phnom Penh, the government's last position on
business and social matters with adthe river that was once the capital's lifeline. University students also rallied
ministrators and alumni quite a bit.
protestEontinuing U.S. aid to the Lon Nol government, saying "It is time to
Myskania's role at this University
stop the war."
can be as large as the initiative of its
NIAROBI, Kenya (AP) As straining j coffin-bearers lowered the
individual members.
mutilated body of J.M. Kariuki into' the grave, a high-ranking government
employee whispered to a friend; "We are not burying Kariuki today, we are
burying the government. This is the beginning of the end."
The civil servant was shaken after hearing a parade of speakers turn most
popular volitician into an antigovernment political rally.
On Tuesday April 8,1975, the Pre-Medical/ Dental Advisory Committee
' SAIGON (AP) Officials said Wednesday the government is giving up ti
in conjunction with the Pre-Med, Pre-Dent Society will hold a Medical
School Symposium. The symposium will be held beginning at 6:00 pm in fourth province and possibly afifthwhich includes theold imperial capital of
L.C. 23. The evening will open with general remarks by the Advisory Hue as thousands of refugees fled south through Vietnam's coastal lowlands
Committee followed by small group seminars dealing with procedures and and jungles.
The Saigon command said the flood of frightened civilians trying to escape
timetables for applications and recommendations, the various types of
the encroaching North Vietnamese was the biggest ofthelong Vietnam war.
medical school interviews and the foreign medical school alternative.
WASHINGTON (AP) The Phillips Petroleum Co. and five other oil
Speakers for the evening will include an admissions officer from a New
York State Medical School, students who have recently returned from refiners were indicted Wednesday on federal charges of conspiring to raise
foreign schools and continued their medical studies at Albany Medical and fix wholesale gasoline prices in five Western states from mid-1970
College and first and third year students who will describe what their through 1971.
education has involved. Forms and information booklets will be distributed
The indictment, returned by a grand jury in U.S. District Courtin Los
by the Advisory Committee and there will be ample time to have questions Angeles, accused the companies of suppressing price competition and'
answered.
depriving customers of the benefit of a free market
WASHINGTON (AP) The House began debate Wednesday on
It is important that all students interested in professional health care
schools for Fall 1976 attend this meeting as it will be the only time this year emergency legislation intended to boost farm price supports on key crops and
milk.a bill theFord administration says would be costly to consumers and
that procedure for application will be discussed.
could lead to surplus production at taxpayer expense.
Backers of the bill, led by Rep. Thomas S. Foley, D-Wash., said rami
(ZNS) Students at Towson State College in Maryland are being offered a expenses have risen sosharplythat emergency action is needed to help stave
off financial chaos among the nation's wheat, cotton, feed grain and dairy
self-defense course called "Mug-A-Thug 101."
The course, taught by an ex-Green Beret, teaches both male and female producers.
students how to fend off would-be attackers.
,,,,, „
WASHINGTON (AP) The Supreme Court ru|cd Wednesday that the
government must pay Social Securitybcnelitsto widowers as well as widows
when they arc left with children in thier care.
In an 8 to Odccison, the court said a federal law restricting the benefits to
widows is unconstitutional sex discrimination.
WASHINGTON (A P) The House slashed a $300 million off the cost ol a
rural economic emergency farm bill Wednesday night and crushed a
Kcpublicanbackcd compromise on key crop price supports.
The House then adjourned after a long day's debate on the controversial
farm legislation, leaving its final decisions for Thursday, when a disputed
section on dairy supports is due for action.
WASHINGTON (AP) The FBI secretly interfered with political
campaigns, promoted racial unrest and anonymously mailed abusive letters
in a 10-year campaign to disrupt the Socialist Workers party, according
to newly disclosed FBI documents.
The tactics even reached into the mational headquarters ol the Boy Scout*
of America.
WASHINGTON (Al>) An attempt by the Central Intelligence Agency to
raise a Soviet submarine intact from the depths of the Pacific Ocean waiwell
worth the risk of public disclosure, several congressional leaders and a senior
naval officer said Wednesday.
and the 4 oz. size. Total* 2 oz. has
You may not even be lazy.
Others, however, expressed strong doubts that the potential gain ol
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and the new economy 4 oz. size
solution to wet contacts, another for
spent on the project.
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25%.
soaking, still another to clean them
DETROIT (AP) Special unemployment benefit funds at Chrysler and
and maybe one for cushioning?
Total* is available at the
General Motors arc expected to rundrythis spring, leaving morelhan 130,000
It gets pretty complicated to say
campus bookstore or your local
laid off auto workers in bleak financial straits.
nothing of the expense.
drugstore.
LOS ANGELS (AP) A grand jury rctuncd a secret indictment Tuesday
And we're so sure you'll
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boxtop
with
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NEW YORK (AP) Doctors in-training who struck 22 hospitals in a
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Offer
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There are two
ALBANY, N.Y.(AI') A stale commission says that New York City has
July 31,1975.)
good ways to buy
used fiscal "gimmickry" to undcrfinancc its public employee pension funds,
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and that the city's pension plans will cease to be fully funded by 1977.
The stale's Commission on Public Employee Pension and Retirement
Systems said in a report Tuesday that the financial condition of the city's
pension systems is "steadily deteriorating."
ALBANY, N.Y. The New York Assembly voted Wednesday to repeal the
states fair iradc law, a move that supporters said could permit price
reductions of 25 to 40 per cent on brand name products.
The fair trade law, passed in the 1930s depression when prices were
declining rapidly, permits manufacturers to establish a fixed price through
contracts with suppliers of merchants.
ALBANY, N.Y. (AP) A Carey campaign official acknowledged
Wednesday that he provided advice on publication of stories damaging to
then Gov, Malcolm Wilson's campaign against Hugh Carey last fall.
Leonard Schwartz, the Carey aide, said he suggested names ol
investigative reporters to Assemblyman Daniel Haley, D-St. Lawrence, who
told Schwartz about an lleged deal between Wilson and the Conservative
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Snowball Fight No Demonstration, Say Students
by C.S. Santino
A massive snowball fight involving over three hundred students
from Oneonta Stae College and
nearby Hartwick College followinga
recent lecture by Watergate defendent John Dean at Oneota State has
been labeled by the local media as "a
political demonstration." Students,
surprised and amused by this
analysis of their boisterous activities,
are calling the "event' simply "a
snowball fight."
The fight started shortly after the
John Dean lecture had let out and
the students found two inches of
ireshly fallen snow n the ground. A
handful of students from an upper
campus dorm, heaving snowballs
and shouting with mock emphasis
phrases like "Down with the ruling
class!" "Up with the people!" and
"Come out and fight you bastards!"
drew enough students out of the surrounding dorms for a fairly large
snowball fight.
Apparently, John Dean, whose
impending appearance had been a
subject of controversy in Oneonta,
had spoken briefly about class
struggles that night. The students,
claiming they recognized this as
choice material for noise-making,
picked up on this theme for their
slogan-shouting. Cries of "This one's
for Ike!", "Remember the Alamo!",
and "Tippycanoc and Tyler too!"
were also prevalent.
"Politics was the last thing on my
mind," said oc Oneonta State junior,
"I just wanted a snowball'fight. I
wasn't even at the John Dean lecture."
The fight picked up momentum,
moving down-campus, as one dorm
after another emptied out into the
courtyards until nearly the whole
campus was covered with cheering,
snowball-flinging Oneonta students.
The students, now numbering in
the hundreds, swept across town to
Hartwick College, a private school
about o ne-half mile from the Oneonta State ampus. Throwing snowballs
and changting, the Oneonta State
students challenged the Hartwick
students to a mid-winter free-fro-all,
Whether oo involved instudics or
socked by the awsomecrowdnoone
knows, but the Hartwick students
refused to join the fray, though there
were isolated instances of retaliation. Before the State students finally retreated they left 30 door and
window glass panes broken at
Hartwick.
The next morning, a disc jockey at
WDOS, a local city radio station,
was on the air devoting much of his
show to the "political demonstration" the ight before. According to
the local media, the snowball fight
was a class confrontation and the
result of the "politically catalystic
effect of John Dean's speech at
Oneonta."
A reporter for the State Times,
Oneonta State's campus paper, who
was at the fight, called WDOS' appraisal of the incident a "wildly
fascinating theory" which "contains
nol one grain of truth."
Thousands Rally for Pay Raise
News Analysis by Randi Toler
For a moment I thought that'lhad
stepped through the time tunnel and
landed smack in the middle of 1968.
As I weaved through the never ending swarms of people encompassing Washington Avenue, I
realized that this was one helluva a
demonstration. Fond memories of
peace demonstrations long gone,
utile McGovern rallies, even
Woodstock, entered my mind dizzying me with nostalgia.
Over twenty thousand people
were gathered together in one place
for a single cause on March IS, 1975
in the midst of the apathy epidemic.
Of course the cause was not for
peace, presidents, or pleasure. The
nature." According to this pamphlet, into dealing with 'administrivia' demonstrators needed cash to fill
"Physical examinations for sports, (paperwork), which leaves little time their pockets, but let's forget that
screening examinations and inter- for developing programs of contact trivial bit of information for the
moment, okay?
views, and prophylactic (preventive) with smaller groups."
Even though 1 roamed through
injections for travel and allergies are
Five Full-Time Doctors
the enormous gathering as only a
all performed regularly."
The infirmary has five full-time
spectator, I found myself cheering
Dr. Hood emphasized that all
with the laborers and booing at the
records are strictly confidential and physicians, a full-time psychiatrist,
name of the governor whom I myself
that psychiatric notes are kept two and one-half "equivalent"
physicians and twelve registered
had voted for only four and a half
separately fvmm health records.
nurse, s well as several part-time
months ago. I will admit that I am
Other vital parts of the Student
nurses. "Approximately 250 to 300
easily swayed by group pressure but
Health Service include the pharmacy
patients visit the health center a
I think the unity of thai crowd would
within the building and transportaday," says Dr. Hood. "Many people
have moved most any innocent
tion service, something that has
don't realize the difficulty in waiting
bystander to sympathize with the
proven essential to handicapped
to see outside doctors, as compared
Civil Service Employees.
students. According to Dr. Hood,
to the jelativcly short waiting time to
With a few strokes of black magic
the infirmary will also make apsee a doctor on campus."
markers, many protestors had
pointments for students with
doctored Carey campaign posters so
qualified specialists (dentists, opAccording to Dr. Hood, "Goverthat the Governor bore a striking
tometrists, surgeons, etc.), since
nor Carey's 'freeze' has had its effect
resemblance to a guy named Adolph
"students may not be familiar with
on the infirmary in several ways.
Hitler. There was no doubt that the
doctors in the area."
There are no replacement of
CSEA members were angry and they
Dr. Hoods major role is to workers, and doctors have had to
gathered on the Capitol building
"outline and implement medical give up phones on their desks for
steps to voice their anger to the man
policy." One prpblem Dr. Hood says economy."
whom they hold responsible for their
she faces is that "too much time goes
grievances.
The demonstration was a peaceful
one as rock music blasted from the
Capitol steps and the protestors
promised to rally together to light
the cut backs. The weather was
totally atypical for Albany this time
of year, it was a beautiful day.
Little children and dogs delighted
in the thousands of friendly people
chanting together and picnicking on
the great lawn. The spirit of the
crowd was positively inspiring.
Everybody liked everybody else and
Infirmary Aids Health Problems
by Maria Abrams
The expression "what you don't
know won't hurt you" is far from
good advice when what you could
know may help you. According to
Dr. Janet Hood,directorofStudent
Health Service, "one of the most
common misconceptions about
campus health service is that people
don't realize care is free." While
stressing the importance of Student
Health Insurance to cover costs of
medicine as well as outside referrals
to specialists and x-rays, Dr. Hood
stated that "the infirmary will treat
any student for general health
problems. Faculty, staff and visitors
will be treated or emergency, advice
and referral free of charge."
The infirmary offers several
specialized services, including birth
control, gynecology, cardiology,
venereal disease treatment and psychiatry. A pamphlet describing the
campus hellh service defines its funcilon as largely "preventive in
TWal
soaks S*al
cleans «s»
cushion
Total'makes contact lenses easier.
Available at: Hannan Pharmacy
Western Avenue
PAGE TWO
!
ALBANY STUDENT PRESS
Compiled by Malt Kaufman and Cheryl Schneider
MARCH 20, 1975
TIM campus Infirmary which ofltrt »•*• tardea and advice to
people with medical problem*
MARCH 20, 1975
l«niy
over twenty thousand people of all
walks of life hated GovernorCarey.
As the demonstrators began to
head towards their buses (some
walking a little unsteadily after
visiting many of the bars in easy
proximity of the Capitol building)
my friend and I gave up looking for
his father, whom we knew to be
demonstrating somewhere out there.
We decided to check out the Capitol
building and sec if there was any
reaction to the demonstration in the
halls of the slate legislature.
While riding the elevator, one
legislator made a remark about
escaping from the demonstrators but
he refrained from continuing further
when I nonchalantly stared him in
the face.
The Senate was not in session, the
Assembly was not in session, there
were no committee meetings in
session, and I have heard that
Governor Carey was still hiding out
in his office. The demonstrators'
chants were completely shut out by
the overwhelming architecture of the
cumbersome Capitol. Maybe I'm
wrong but I got the feeling that the
protestors' elected representatives
were, well, ignoring their
constituents outside.
Alter the crowd had thinned out
remnants of the huge mass of people
were evident on the lawn outside the
Capitol. Discarded placards, empty
wine bottles concealed in brown
paper bags, bumper stickers strewn
on the ground and very flat grass left
no doubts that many, many people
had been demonstrating there. On
the outskirts of Capitol Park, I saw
something that made me laugh.
There parked on the corner was a
New York City vender with his
familiar steel push curl selling hoi
pretzels. Even at a demonstration
representing 147.000 Civil Service
Employees, the little guy has got to
make a buck. Besides, everybody
loves hot pretzels.
(CT'S) Wondering what to do to meet the rising tuition, roomand meal
costs? Do what one Columbia University coed did—become an actor in a
porno film.
It all began last September when pornography producer Carter Steven (a
stage name) ran an ad in the Columbia Spectator asking for "liberated, goodlooking" women wanting to make "very good money." The job was a major
role in a porno film at $150 a day.
The woman, a PhD English candidate, said she thought it would be
interesting and she was eventually hired by Stevens.
ALBANY STUDENT PRESS
PAGE THREE
Shades of Grten
ZODIAC NEW
Two Doctors, writing in TheNew
England Journal ofMedicine, report
that a Boston man has suddenly
begun to grow bright green hair on
his head, but that no one can explain
why.
backyard garden, and the number is face. They have also distributed its,
Doctors Lewis Holmes and' ing for me."
weight a bit differently, but they say
on the increase.
Lowell Goldsmith, working out of
Sealed Homes
their new ball meets every strict rethe Massachusetts General Hospital,
Prison Phone Phreaks quirement
A lawyer for a Canadian lead
of the United States Golf
say the green hair has been cropping smelting company has come up with
"Phone Phreaks" are now
up in various shades all over the a novel solution to industrial air operating inside California's Association.
Their tests, they say, show that the
scalp of a SI-year-old man.
prisons.
pollution.
The doctors state they subjected
The Los Angeles Sheriff's Depart- ball travels about as far as the stanAttorney Ian Outerbridge
the man's hairs to every known suggests that tall city apartment ment reports that three prisoners in dard golf ball, yet reduces hooks and
microscopic and chemical test in an towers should be built absolutely air the maximum facility at Wayside slices by 80per cent.They call their
effort to discover the cause of the tight so that polluted air outside can- Honor Rancho have been busted on invention the "Happy Nonbizarre hair coloring. They report) not get inside the building. What's charges of making long-distance Hooker."
however, they can find no reason more, says Outerbridge, modern calls using counterfeit credit card
Paw Reading
why the man's hair would turn such apartments should not have ' numbers.
You've all heard about palm
an odd color, but that the green hair balconies on them since balconies
The three inmates are accused of reading.
is "really quite striking."
would simply encourage people to using a prison pay phone to run up
Well, a London mystic reports she
about $600 in phone bills charged to can predict the futures of pet cats
step outside into foul air.
Pay Johns
Outerbridge offered his other person's credit cards. One of and dogs by practicing "paw
The "Committee to End Pay
Toilets in America" has won another suggestions while representing the inmated charged all his calls to reading."
Toronto refiners and smelters the Chino Municipal Court. Prison
Magenta Wise of Brighton says
significant victory.
The national organization which limited during air pollution hearings officials report that a dozen other in- she established her "Animal Clairmates are suspects in the Phone voyant Consultancy" when she
calls itself "CEPTIA", reports that in Toronto.
The attorney said that sealed-in
noticed that an animal's paw
pay stalls in the state of Iowa have
buildings could be provided with air
revealed just as much about their
been "liberated."
futures as human hands do about
It happened when the Iowa House through special filtering systems.
Earlier in the hearings, Outerbridge
people.
also suggested that children who live
Wise reports that a broad paw
near lead smelting plants have high
generally means the animal is exlevels of lead in their blood because
troverted, while a pinched paw is a
they might have been eating paint.
sign that the dog or cat is up-tight
and inhibited. .
INTERESTED fOLK
Bootleg Homework
A San Diego disk jockey has
become a smash success overnight
by bootlegging—not beer, records or
drugs—but "homework".
Each weeknight, students from
about 20 high schools in the San
Diego area can tune in to IXill and
hear disc jockey Larry (The Cruiser)
Himmcl answer some of their
homework assignments. Himmcl
MAJORS ft rNMNOJS.
The Pre-medicat -Dental Advisory
Com mi (fee in conjunction with the
Pre-Med, Pre-Dent Society will hold
a symposium for student! intending
application to medical, dental and
other professional health care schools
for Fall 1976 on Tuesday, April 8 at 6
p.m. in LC 23. Many topics, including
f>i^«jfS''
says he has about 45 student "contacts" from various high schools who
supply him with answers to
homework problems. He then
broadcasts the "homework" over the
air, in between cuts of rock and roll
music.
Free Seeds
licuipntttt 75-78
Attention Cay Students The Gay
Alliance meets Tuesday evenings at 9
p.m. in CC 370. This week's meeting
will involve a discussion of plans for
the upcoming "It'i nice to be Gay
Day." Interested persons are encouraged to attend.
** *
Deadline for applications to take
the April 26 DAT is March 3 1 .
Deadline for May 3 MCAT i* April 7.
Application Brochures available in
University College.
#**
#* *
There will be a meeting of India
Association on March 20th, 1975. If
you want to be a member of interested in what we are doing please
come to Social Science Romm 255 at 6
p.m.
Attention Spanish Majors;
Sigma Delta Pi, the Spanish Honor
Society, will be initiating members
this spring, tf you: a) have had 3
years of college Spanish (including at
least 3 semester hours of a 300 level
lit. course) with a minimum GPA of
3.0, you may be eligible.
OFFICIAL NOTICE
If you are interested please leave
your name, address and phone
in
Dr. Carrino'sof fice SS339 or call 4574528. Any questions? Contact Diane
Schwartzman (president), 489-6905.
The University library, including
the two branch libraries, will have an
amnesty wee* May 3-9. All overdue
books, except Reserve and Personal,
Reserve books, will be accepted
without fines during that period.
CLUBS & MEETINGS
US-China Peoples Friendship
Association study group on new
Chinese constitution is April 10at7:30 •
p.m. at 727 Madison Avenue. Tommy
at 472-8761 for more into. All invited.
It you have an interest in the sport
of Archery come down to the
Women's Auxiliary Gym (2nd floor)
and join Albany State Archers.
Tuesday evening 6:30-8:00 p.m.
Community Service Registration
April 9-16 between LC 3 and 4, 9
a.m.-4 p.m. Medical and legal
placements Thurs, April 10 only.
Community Service StudentsGroup evaluation sessions have
begun, everyone must attend one
session.
Attention: There will be a forty-five
(43) calendar day time limit for
grievances to be filed with the M
Ombudsman. To allow students with
problems extending back to the
beginning of the 74-75 school year to
fllegreivance forms, a thirty (30)day
"open" period has been established.
During this "open" period the fortyfive day deadline will not be in
effect.
The Veteran's Information
Center In Draper Hall. Room 141, is
open Monday thru Friday. We ahve
information on educational benefits,
a veteran's work-study program and
o tutorial service. Want to know why
that chech isn't coming? Or just want
to rap, come down or call 472-7563.
***
Transportation information and
registration forms for the
International leadership Seminar
March 22-29 can be obtained ot the
Campus Center CARP table or at 336
State St. Albany 12210, 463-3007.
Visits can also be arranged at your
convenience.
This "open" period ends April 19,
after which the time limit will be
adhered to.
#**
You have until 5:00 taday to sign
up for the quiet halll
#* i
We are collecting meal card
numbers Monday and Tuesday, April
7 and 8, in the Campus Center and
on dinner lines for the Food fast.
Money goes to Easter Seals and
Northeastern New York Speech
Women's Softball- women
needed to complete team. Please
ioin. Practice 3:30-5:30 M-F.
Interested contact Ms. Rhenish, P.E.
or Diana Woolis, 7-8964.
Center.
Volunteers needed to work at the
Third Annual Alumni Phonothon.
April 14-17 and 21-24. Call lori 73011 or David 7-4773.
•**
Jewish Students
Coalition
presents: Dr. Roman Vishniac Tues.
April 8, 1975—8 p.m.—LC 1. He will
present a multi-media presentation
on "The Holocaust: Resistance and
the Warsaw Ghetto Uprising." This
is a commemoration for Yom
Hashoah, the day of commemoration
for the 6 million Jews who died in
Nazi Germany.
Art class at JCA needs male nude
model. Must be available on
Thursdays 1:30-4:30 p.m. If
interested contact Judy Waterman at
Junior College of Albany.
Jewish Students Coalition
presents: Dr. Roman Vishniac on
Tuesday, April 8 at 8 p.m. in LC 1. He
will present a
multi-media
presentation on "The Holocaust:
Resislanceand theWarsaw Ghetto
Uprising."
this will be to
commemorate Yom Hashoah.
Anyone interested in playing Gir/s
field Hockey this fall must call Coach
Rhenish at 7-4535 or contact her in PE
242 to sign up.
** *
The Marines are looking for a few
good men. Are you one of them? For
more information, contact Matt
Meyer, Box 356, Dutch Quad.
...
Woman's Counseling Collective,
a service by women forwomen. Walk
in, call in. 332 Hudson Ave, Albany
(befw. Lark and Dove). M-F, 6:009:00 p.m., 462-6739.
Friends, do you need someone to
let out your hassles to? Middle
Earth's hotline 7'S300 and drop-in
center provide a 24-hour service for
you. You need not give your name
and you still can be assured of
getting drug, sex, housing or
pregnancy info. Counselors are
as well as Greyhound to all points in the Great Northeast
MAIN THEME:
Tix on sale across from check cashing
Thurs - 1-4
Viae uM be pmment sperias
•••
Community Service Credits?
Education majors and others. Get
credit working In jobs ot Bishop
Gibbons High School. Variety of
interesting jobs. Transportation
possible, flexible scheduling. Call
393-3131.
US-China Peoples Friendship
Association. All invited to a study
group on China's new constitution.
Thrusday, April 3, at 7:30 p.m., 727
Madison Ave. More info (and copies
of constitution): Tommy, 472-8761;
Mike, 472-9524; Mickey, 465-6874.
Couples interested in Pre-Cono or
in general marriage preparation,
please contact the Chapel House
staff before vacation.
Anyone interested in becoming a
lay minister should contact Sister
Helene before vacation.
Lecture: April 9, 2:00-3:00 p.m.,
Fine Arts Bldg., Room 126. Prof. M.
Frinta: "New Attribution Sys'em of
14th Century Panel Painting."
...
Students interested lifli making a
video tape on coping with death
and dying please contact the Chapel
House staff.
Viewpoint needs writers, artists,
graphics people. Call Bob at 4574754.
to Rochester, Buffalo,
Syracuse & Grand Central
Screwed by the Rotor* You* jQivraimnt CU) (PYE^
available far help in specific problem
areas. So, drop in at Toss fyc* Koll,
Dutch Quad and find out for yourself
that M.E. is people who are
concerned and care about your
problems—no matter how big or
small they may appear.
#*•
Earth Week '75 sponsored by the
MB Club is scheduled for April 1016. Main theme: World Food Criiis.
For any Info call 457-8569 or come to
FA 218.
Now w e have AMTRAK
AfldlOttvApriiettT
Fri - 9-4
Men interested in joining a
consciousness raising group, please
call Bob ot 785-1197 or Rob at 4388008.
Gay Catholics- you are invited to join
your gay brothers and sisters for mass
at the Gay Community Center, 332
Hudson Ave., Albany, March 23 at 7
p.m. A short meeting will follow to
discuss DIGNITY,
a national
organization for gay and concerned
Catholics- info, 434-4440. All are
welcome! Musicians needed.
* difference!!! i
7 fflsVWII n»*W#
1
I cm
MCAT
DAT
LSAT
GRE
0CAT
FLEX
ietfmffljjjRB
For Ticket info call
DRIVE OUR CARS
FREE
To Florida, California, and
all cities in the USA.
PAGE FOUR
The Outing Club takes out several
trips every weekeng to such areas as
the Adirondacks, the White
Mountains, and the Berkshires. We
go sno-shoeing, x-skiing, ice climbing
and of course, spelunkingl Get
involved and have fun. Come to our
meeting Wednesday nights at 7:30 in
R-315 of the Campus Center.
procedures for application and
recommendations, will be discussed.
All interested students should attend
this meeting!
mm mm LB mwm
Mu»tb» IS y o n old
Duplicate Bridge every Monday
at 6:30 in CC 375. Cash prizes.
Speical first-of-the-month big stakes
game. Info call Andy, 7-8759.
...
The government may be giving
HAVE A NICE VACATION EVERYBODY!
seeds away this spring.
A bill providing three packets of
free seeds to each American family
The Albany Student Press will resume publicawas squelched by the House Appropriations Committee last year.
tion on the first Friday back after vacation,
,erl3 .. .
However, Pacific News Service Phreak ring.
April 11.
In the meantime, the Sheriffs
reports that this year, with the price
of Representatives voted this week, of seeds up 25 percent, Congress may Department says that prisoners have
80 to IS, to outlaw all pay toilets in just pass the "free seed law."
been abusing their pay phone
public places in Iowa. The pay Johns
The seed give-away is not a new privileges in other ways. Deputies
were banned despite the fact that idea. For almost a century, between say that one inmate used the phone
pay-toilet-makers passed out 1839 and 1923, the U.S. government to telephone Washington and to talk
pamphlets to lawmakers which gave free seeds to citizens who asked to Supreme Court Justice William
quoted 100 satisfied customers.
lor them. The need may be large: O. Douglas personally.
CEPTIA claims that pay stalls arc Last year, 47 percent of U.S.
Another inmate, the Department
"degrading" and are sexist as well. It households grew some sort of reports, was using the prison phone
charges that pay toilets are unfair to
to talk to friends on the outside to
women because men are never subplan robberies. That inmate evenneeds researchers, writers,
jected to "pay urinals."
tually got a wrong number and endgraphics and layout people.
ed up calling a police lieutenant by
CEPTIA, which boasts 1600
mistake: Sheriffs say that was the
members nationwide, estimates
end of the robbery scheme.
there are 50,000 pay toilets in the
WE'RE STARTING WORK NOW!
U.S. grossing an incredible $30
Golf Ball No Hooker
So, if you're interested, call:
million a year.
Two California inventors may
Donna (457-5231)
have revolutionized golf. They claim
Sexorelst
or
to have designed a golf ball that will
The Brazil Herald is out with a
neither hook nor slice.
strange report about a showing of
Bob (457-4754)
Physicist Fred Holmstrom and
the movie "The Exorcist" in Rio de
funded by student association
chemist Daniel Ncpcla, both of San
Janiero.
Jose, have redesigned the golf ball by
During a recent screening of the
removing some of dimples on its sur- *tmumum*mmM»mmmmiimmutnn*nwmunw
film at the La Pampa Theatre, one of
HMMW MM
the scenes was interrupted by a large
wmmmmamimammmmmtmmmmim**
brown rat that scurried across the
stage. The intrusion entirely distracted the audience's attention, and
when usherette Yama Gomez
appeared on stage with a mop to attack the rat, the audience chanted,
"Take them off. Take them off."
The newspaper said the usherette
did not realize the audience wanted
her and the rat off-stage. Instead,
when she finished clubbing the rat,
she proceeded to oblige the crowd by
tailing off her clothes, and dancing
naked in front of the screen.
The theatre was soon cleared by
armed guards. The Herald quotes
Gomez, as saying afterwards: "As the
shouting continued after I got the
rat, I thought the audience was call-
AAACON AUTO
TRANSPORT
8 9 Shaker Road
Terrace Apartment
Albany, N.Y.
442-7471
learn about the donoen « f
n u c l e a r p o w e r . Come see
Informative films March 1 9 1 March
20, 7:30 p.m., tC 1°.
ffimndmm
flrtip^
acted* < / ^ ^
fHjirre nrraranire(mq
W———••••••••*••!
funded by siudeiil association
¥
¥
¥
¥
¥
¥
¥
Greyhound 434-0121
note:
Amtrak 434-1693
Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm
ALBANY STUDENT PRESS
MARCH 20, 1975
s
Amtrak T/x are from the ColorWe Station. If you prefer to leave from
the Rensselaer Station you can trade in your ticket and either get a
refund or pay the difference
fymied
ftv
mfaii amfhuhm
MARCH 20, 1975
ALBANY STUPENT PRESS
PAGE FIVE
^ o u have given up on Cambodia, you have given up on Taiwan, and you wiU give up (
editorial /cpmme nt
^^'
of Syria, spooking to Htray Kissinger at a conference yesterday.
Hafez Assad, Preside,
letters
Twentieth Centura," thus the lecture topic
appeared to be in keeping with the course
focus.
On March 7, McCarthy appeared before
our claw and proceeded to give a campaign
speech supporting his announced candidacy
for President in : 1976. He clearly statcdin his
opening comments that he did not intend to
speak on the Friedan topic, although Dr. J.G.
Barker-Benfieid, who had arranged to have
him come, had made it appear that this was
To the Editor:
what he had agreed to speak on. McCarthy
1 would like to openly commend Paul said that he had not agreed to this topic and
Koine's article in the ASP of Feb. 25, 197S, had not come to SUNYA to speak on this
entitled "Cyprus After War." While offering topic.
us a complete and truthful overview of the
We wish to protest our class being used asa
Cyprus situation, he remained unbiased and platform for political campaigning. We
withheld his emotions; and this is very difficult understand that Eugene McCarthy received a
for a Greek to do.
large fee—which was paid out of University
Being currently involved with the funds—to deliver his political campaign
movement active in seeking to gain a fair speech to our class. We object to University
settlement in Cyprus, which is based in New funds being used to support one candidate
York City, I have been appalled by the stand unless all other candidates are similarly
taken by Ford and Kissinger in the name of the supported.
American people. The State Department and
Moreover, we question if Eugene
C.l.A. collaborators not only planned and McCarthy was the appropriate speaker to
engineered the invasion of Cyprus by Turkish bring in to speak to the class on sex role
troops armed with sophisticated U.S. identity. He has hardly distinguished himself
weapons, but presently persist in their support as a scholar in this area, while there arc many
of the invading barbarians by refusing to other women'" and men who have, who it
convince them to come to terms with the seems would have been much more
Greek Cypriote majority at the conference appropriate choices. We cannot help but think
table. Meanwhile, 250,000 refugees wait, that he was brought to the University under
homeless, for some sign of relief towards their the pretext of speaking to our class for the sake
innocent suffering. One could go on and on of offering him political support in the form of
about this culpable U.S. Administration, but money and publicity. This objective is strongly
knowing that one day these murderers will be suggested in that the publicity poster that were
brought to justice by decent and democratic printed up by the American Studies
citizens, our present time could be better Program regarding his talk to our class
spent.
identified him as: "Eugene J. McCarthy,
It is imperative that all freedom-loving Independent Candidate for President in
students at Albany State write their legislators 1976."
requesting the continuation of the embargo on
We think that this matter should bo of
arms to Turkey, and that immediate relief serious concern to the University in view of its
measures be taken to alleviate some of the requirement to remain non-partisan at all
immense burdens of the Cypriote nation and times.
people. Our Congress has indeed shown some
Students from American Studies I00B
sense of humanity and benevolence in their
actions to date on the Cyprus issue, and it is
important to remind them that Cyprus will
never be forgotten by Americans, and that she
willonedayriseagaintoresumehcrroleasthe
gem of the Mediterranean.
Harris Pastidcs
Class of 1974
Gem
of the
Mediterranean
I Lack of Faculty
Telethon has once again reached a successful close and once again it is due to the
hard work and generosity of the students and members of the administration. The
money raised for the Wildwood Schoolwill enablemorehandicappedchildrento reach
their greatest potential asindividuals. Anyone present during the 24 hours could feel the
love and gratitude of the children and parents for our attempts to help.
This statement is directed toward the faculty: In a university communityofthissize it
is both surprising and abhorent that Telethon received a total lack of support from
them. Except for those few professors who agreed to take a pie in the face for the sake
ofhihrity,there wasn't one faculty member present during the 24 hours.
At thispointin the development of our university, it is important that we achieve a
sense of unity. The students and the faculty are not two alien and divided factions nor
should they be. We have tied onceagain.and we have failed. If the faculty is unable to
respond to the students in the name of charity, thentherearefew avenues left open to us.
The onus for action now lies with the faculty.
Times and Places
Last Monday sign-up began for special "quiet" residence halls on campus. The
dorms are Pierce Hall downtown, and floors'6through21 in Stuyvesant Tower. These
dorms will house next year, if there is any interest in them, students who are
academically oriented and who want a quiet studious atmosphere.
All this sounds well and good, but there are some issues involvedthat need
clarification.
College is more than a place to study, read books, and take exams. The essence of
college life is learning, but it's learning more than what's written in books. It's learning
to interact with other people, it's learning about yourself, it's learning to be a person.
That may take staying up all night drinking, or partying, and running through the halls
screaming, now and then. The people will live in these quiet dorms will be depriving
themselves of many of the experiences that make up the total college experience.
Of course there are students who are involved in their studies, but there are times
and places at this University where schoolwork can be pursued without distractions.
The proposal for quiet dorms envision town hall meetings to establish policy, and
enforcement of guidelines set on the "academic atmosphere." Punishment for
breaking these rules could lead to expulsion from those dorms. Although that is a
remote possibility, the implications are disturbing.
Kick and Humor
Humor is a difficult thing to understand. The reasons one person has for laughing
might make someone else cry, or have no effect at all. Most humor is based on someone ! r PONT KNOW WHAT
else's misfortune, like when someone jumps off a building into a truckfull of bananas or
&VTI
THINK YOU'RE
when a prisoners gun which was made gut of soap begins to wash hishands. Today's
Kick-In- The-A SP.nn early celebration of April Fool's Day, has some of that humor in
it.
Satireandsubtle inconsistency are considered a more sophisticated kind of humor.
This is when a situation is presented that is close to reality but has some bizarre or
absurd twists. A version of these kinds of jokes is the jokes one thinks is real, when, for
KSftasssS:^;^
example, one's brother comes in to say that school is canceled or what happened when
Orson Wells put on his radio show War of the Worlds about forty years ago.
HE'S BEEN SAVING FOR Z5 YEARS.
GOf&EOUG, WIlP ANP IRRESiST/eM
Faculty Faulted
Classroom Ethics
In Washington:
A more controversial form but probably more wide-spread than any of these is
"dirty" humor, that is, jokes about sex, excretion, death and other subjects usually
found disgusting. Obscnity is especially pravcative because it has been in conflict with
the FirstAmendmcntfor years. While it us disturbing to many people, obsenityis also
very funny to others. Some find obsentiy the only subject worth laughing about.
Yet, the only reason we laugh at obscenity is because it s so shocking to some people
We laugh in shock or to cover embarrassment. There are elements of misfortune in this
humor, like on the Kick Preview page, but the key element of its success is its shock
value.
Today's Kick has all kinds of humor in it, and few enjoy all kinds of humor. Some
will be offended, some bored, some pleased, and some hysterical, but, in any case, we
hope you enjoy today's Kick insert.
x
EDITOR IN CHIH
BtlSINtSS MANACtR
NtW
DANIEL ciAINKS
LliS ZUCKEKMAN
H,,T0
"
"
AsMICIATi NtWS EDITORS
AmCTSWITOS
PRODUCTION MANACU
TtCHNICAL.DlTOR
ASSOCIATI TECHNICAL EDITORS
EDITORIAL FAIIE EDITOR
SMUTS IO.TO«
ASSOCIATE SPORTS EDITOR
AIITS EDITORS
AV.RTIS.NO MANAOER
ASSOCIATE ADVMTISINC; MANAGER
ClASSIltD ADVERTISING MANAIiER
GRAEEITI EDITOR
PREVIEW EDITOR
STAEE
TOOTttCRAMERS
M.CIIABL SENA
STEPHEN D/.1NANKA, H u m STEIN
BRIAN a m u
PATRICK McGlYNN
DONALD NBMCIK
|. ( ) U | S l i M A H | C S | C A K O L M c p | | | m S O N
MARCWMOBR
BRUCRMAOOIN
NATHANSALANT
pAlJL p B U 0 A U t I i
A L A N Auim
'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.
E
HILLARY KELRICK
L.NOA DB.MOND
J l u pLBCK
' J O A N N E ANDREWS
WENDY ASHE.
LISA BlUNDO
„ | c L|B|11!5 E | ( | ( , K u E 1 | N
O U R OFFICES ARE LOCATED IN C A M F U S CENTER 326 A N D 334, A N D
OUR W.EPIIONFJi ARE 457-2190 AND 457-2194,
WE ARE FUNDED |IV STUDENT'ASSOCIATION
Of Pterosaurs and SST's
;W:by Ron llendren'W^iftSSSftSSftSWftK-rfSSW:
Last week it was reported that scientists in
ravaging fuel crisis at about this period ihej
West Texas discovered the skeletal remains of
used gasoline at the time—so il was likely
the largest flying creature ever known .
impossible for these early humans to keen
Dubbed the Texas plerosaur (pteron, wing;
these objects off the ground forany lenuiliol
sauros, lizard), the creature lived more than 60 time."
million years ago and had a wing span of 51
Scientists in Europe, however, diputed this
feel—larger than the F-4 jet fighter plane.
theory late today'.Thcy claim to have found
Scientists think it may have fed on dead
ancient newspaper accounts in an area
dinosaurs, an idea suggested by its long neck
thought to have been called Paris ut the lime
enabling pterosaur to probe large carcasses.
which reveal that an SST called Concorde
received permission to land inmanycoumrio.
The story made me think of a'future report,
likely to be read in newspapers of the day including, in the late I900's, a nation culled the
millions of years from now. It will probably
United States.
go like this:
)
Scientists dredging Long Island Sound
Aviar alsopointcdout that if only one nl the
today discovered the remains of what is
things hud flown even a few times n would
thought to be the largest flying object in
have permanently damaged the upper
earth's history. The letters SST, dimmed but atmosphere in ways that would be visible even
discernible, appeared on the object's trunk,
today. There arc no such indications, he saidand experts tentatively suggest they may stand
Apor Banchir, vice chairearthling ol the
for Supersonic Transport, a kind of
World Historical Institurc, supported A liar's
enormous, unwieldy flying object thought to
thesis, but added lhat he doubled the ancient
have been the pet project of a small but
fuel crisis or noise pollution had much lu do
powerful and stubborn group of early human
with the SST's grounding. "By all accounts,
beings.
humans at that time had no understandingul
"Indications are the object only flew a few conservation and little appreciation ol risks.
Banchir said. "If they had the technolog) iu
times," said Nobel Prize winner Thor Aviar,
make it, they would have flown it. unless ilns is
director of the World Anthropological
one of those rare occasions when u ft*
Sociely. "We know from ancient records
found in an important capital city of that era exceptionally advanced humans may have
been able to stand firm enough to prohibit the
that efforts to produce the SST brought near
object's production.
economic ruin to what was then known as
Thus it is thought that this may prove lu he
Western Civilization.
the first recorded instance of early human
"And we can tell from the object's stomach
beings acting responsibly toward their
that it would have consumed energy at an
environment. "If so, the SST find is historic,
enormous rate. The world was hit by a
indeed," Banchir said.
To the Editor:
Friday, March 7, Eugene McCarthy spoke
to our class, American Studies 100B, during
the regularly scheduled class lime 1:10-2:00
p.m. The class had been informed thai
McCarthy would speak on "Betty Friedan's
The Feminine Mystique, a Book l"hat Should
Change the World." American Studies 100B
this Spring Semester is on "Male and Female
Sex Role Identity in ihc Nineteenth and
fiCGftY...
To the Editor:
On behalf of Ernie Sprancc and myself, 1
would like to take this opportunity to thank
the students and administration for their help
andfinancialsupport in making Telethon '75 a
fabulous success. 1 hope that they arc already
aware of our deep and sincere gratitude.
I would also like to take this opportunity to
express my discouragement, disillusionment
and dissatisfaction with the members of the
faculty. Once again it has been made evident
that iwtonlyare they ignorant of any student
related functions but lhat they choose to
remain so.
A few months ago. Telethon sent a letter to
the chairman of each academic department on
mt is
ibaraefofthat
this campus. Our aim was to try to i
lietbcl
them about the Wildwood School, to try to
tongerWasadasannoiar.thesninir
make them more aware of our needs and can no
goals. From these letters we received stale can be nothing but apathy. For sal those who
response. From those departments that we did miyfeela twinge of foniDJsnpi.deaaHnns are
speak to it was obvious that there must have still being accepted. Cheeks taenia be made
been adeficiencyin our educational process. In payable to Telethon 7S and tent to Campus
actuality,except for those professors who Center 361.
generously donated their dignity and received
Karen OUbotT
a pie in the face, our support from the faculty
Co-chairperson Tetehon 7 3
was non-existent;
Telethon is this university's one major
effort to reach out into the community, to
prove that we are part of that community. It is
The Albany Student Press reserves the sole
also the one major campus event where all
right to print or edit letters to the editor.
brances of the university are invited and
Submit letters TYPEWRITTEN to Camencouraged to participate. It is not solely a
pus Center Room 326.
student affair and our increased support from
residence, administration, alumni and
From the Frog's Mourn
^sggi America's Appian Way
j|%
iSBOL
by Gene Carragee
The underlying health of any nation can be
determined by thestateofitscommunications
and transit systems. The onset of the energy
crisis has seriously endangered that pillar of
American transportation, the automobile.
Large scale transport of freight by trucks has
become less and less profitable; and we all
have seen the stcadv increase of public bus
fares. Air transit has the built-in restriction of
very high fuel cost per weight transported. At
maximum capacity air travel is much less
efficient, fuel-wise, than the automobile.
It has become increasingly apparent that the
nation needs a new type of transit system. The
system should provide quick transportation
for both freight and passengers over long
distances; it should have a small land usage
area (the American landscape has seen enough
four lane highways). Finally, and most
importantly it should have a high fuel
efficiency. As it turns out, this "new" form of
transportation is older than the automobile
and much older than the airplane: it is the
railroad.
If it is possible to disconnect the theory of
rail travel from it's old image: that of a
disasterously mismanaged institution that
until recently has been disappearing from the
American landscape, it can be seen that
railroads offer a far more practical and
economical system of transportation than can
be offered by the automobile.
The central problem facing the railroads is
the large amounts of capital that is necessary
to expand and update its services. For so many
years it seemed certain the railroads were
ecouow,Rocw.
eecAotf IT mom,$>
MARCH 20, 1975
doomed to fall before the almighty "American
Frankenstein" from Detroit. Railroad
investors were rightfully wary of investing in a
lost cause. Asa result the lines fell into a pitiful
stale of disrepair, and the systems potential
efficiency has been lost to rotting rails and
antiquated cars.
Environmental groups have, since 1972,
lobbied vigorously for the reappropriation of
funds from the highway trust fund to mass
transit uses. In 1971, the semi-public
"National Railroad Passenger Company."
Amtrak, was created by Congress. Despite the
fears of commercial bus companies, most of
the passengers were drawn from their cars
rather than buses. Government subsidy of the
railroads, especially Amtrak, at least for a few
years, is a necessity. Until the efficiency of the
service is built to its potential, railroads are
not' likely to be a very lucrative operation;
however, it is imperative that America begin
to redevelop its railroads if it does not want to
be choked to death by automobiles and
highways.
As alluded to before, efficient transit is a
key to prosperity. Ancient Rome's grandeur
has to a large extent been attributed to an
amazingly comprehensive syustem of
skillfully built roadways. Caesar was able to
travel with his legions eight hundred miles in
eight days! Roads were built efficiently, and
more importantly, they were built to last—two
thousand years if necessary. In the United
States, too much interest is given to immediate
profit frrom our endeavors. Railroads will »iol
be immediately profitable; however, by most
accounts they arc the long range answer.
$L
PAGE SEVEN
ALBANY STUDENT PRESS
. •.„ • •• I
.
9
for write of the greatest double-lead
playing since Duane and Dicky used
to pick in tandem for the Airman
Brothers Band. Then Larry adds
another dimension to the band when
he moves over to play the keyboards.
In total, the instruments are played
brilliantly and the voices blend
beautifully.
You'll probably be hearing more
and more of Orleans in the near
future. WRPI has already picked
their album for alot of airtime and
their local Northeast tour culminates
in a concert with Loudon
Wainwright in Avery Fisher Hall on
New 'Orleans Album Provides
Varied, Electrifying Sound
by Glenn Veral
Orleans, a band of four brilliantly
talented musicians, has just released
their third album. This new one is
titled "Let There Be Music" is on
Elektra/ Asylum Records.
When 1 listened to the album the
first time I was impressed with the
beautiful four-part harmony they
sang throughout the album. But,
many bands can sound really tight
on records and actually be mediocre
musicians; so 1 originally grouped
Orleans with what I call the "studio
bands," or bands which sound good
after fifty takes in the studio, but just
can't put it together in concert. BUT,
this thought could not be farther
from the truth! (as one thousand
people will attest to who witnessed
the Orleans explosion at Union
College Chapel last month), this
band is as tight and impressive in
concert as they are on all their
albums!
1
They literally electrified the crowd
there for three hours. And that electricity is also present in similar quantity on the new album. From start to finish this album is full of four
beautifully blending, well-arranged
voices backed up by a sound which
varies from easy-listening soft rock
to reggae to funky double-lead
guitars.
As you progress through the
album you hear examples of funky
dance stuff; some lyrical love songs
(which show off the beautiful four
part voice arrangements) and some
m
genuinely good easy-listening laidback rock. Also, there's a reggae
tune on the album but in my opinion
this is not the best example of their
facility for the Jamacian music,
since their other albums contain
much better reggae tunes; however,
in general the music types are varied
just enough to hold your interest all
the way through the album. The
songs don't bore you by all sounding
the same, yet the different styles are
not so diverse as to leave you feeling
like you just listened to a Battle of
the Bands or a Greatest Songs of the
Century album.
The rhythm section (Wells Kelly
on drums, Lance Hoppen on bass) is
as tight as any popular band I have
heard. They are comfortable in all of
the various styles of music on the
album.
The solo instruments (JohnHall,
Guitar and Larry Hoppen on piano,
o r g a n , guitar, synthesizer,
clavinette, trumpet, and you-nameit) are equally as tasteful. Hall darned his trade in the best schoolroom,
the recording studio. You'll find Hall
and Kelly on a wide variety of
albums including ones by Bonnie
Kaitt and Seals and Crofts. Hall
produced one of Bonnie Raitt's
albums and he's also written some
tunes done by Janis Joplin and most
recently, Rufus. The other frontman, Larry H'orSperi; is "the "bastf'
player's older brother. He has been
around the music business quite a
while also, playing in bands and
studios in New York and writing
songs and selling them to other people. He comes from a family of
phenomenal musicians which explains his versatility. Hoppen, also is
a fine reed player as well as a bassist)
Larry and Hall combine on guitar
4
A Woman Under the Influence'
Well-Acted but Disappointing
Ancient Ritual Game
Finds Contestants at SUNYA
residents. "Everyone who walked into this room has
by Lawrence Shumel
Narrow streets and high walls. Ancient cobblestones something in common , " said Russell, "the desire toplay
beneath your feet. Many strangers crowding pass you Backgammon." He conveyed some disappointment at
in silence. Dark forbidding alleyways fall before your the turnout, feeling that many players didn't sho because
eyes, twisting and moving into the darkness. The sound they felt the tournament was for "better" players."Not
of bubbles breaking the surface catches your ear, while so, this tournament was open to all, and we encourage
everyone to attend next time." After all, the best way to
the smell of hashish settles round your nose.
The smell invites you, the darkness engulfs you. Your learn, and to improve, is to play with as many people as
feet begin to move, and soon you are before them. You possible.
"Everyone knows how to play," said Israeli born
are a stranger in a strange land; they are the natives.
You watch them carefully, so as not to miss a move Shimon Farkas. "In the army we play when we are not
they make. Watch the way they smoke eat, talk and play. shooting." Farkas, a student, has been in the U .S. for two
And just what is this game they play? What game has the years now. He has been playing Backgammon since he
power to hold them as they now hold youVTheycall it was 14 years old.
The tournament was conducted by rounds of
Shesh-Besh. Shhh. . .not so loud. We call it Backgameliminaton. Out of the 37, 18 were eliminated after the
first round. Fourteen more followed after the second.
lt is an ancient game that originated somewhere This left 5 people to compete in the finals, the winner
around the Middle East. Its influence has been felt in receiving a $15 dollar prize.
Anis Tanner look first place, followed by Michael
various parts of the world, at various times. It can now be
felt in the Campus Center cafeteria, and was going strong Meyers. Carl Saleuto grabbed third, and Shimon
Farkas came in fourth.
Tuesday night in C.C. 375.
Thesun sinks low over the citadel. The streets fill with
Orgimied by Russell Levitt,ji(he firSf'SUNYA
the shadows of the night.. The gates that surround the
Backgammon tournament drew 37 participants.
The purpose of the tournament was to open the doors city are closing as the men begin to gather. The bubbles
to all players', student, faculty and interested local break, and the "game" begins.
Student
Spring
m
March 21st. The record; company
they made their first two albums
with is re-releasing these earlier
albums with the hope that these
albums will follow the upward trend
that the new one is presently following. So, there should be a wide selection of Orleans around for you to
sample if you feel like it. I'm a confirmed Orleans freak now and I hope
you will pardon me if I have raved a
little. But lean not say enough good
things about the albums I haveheard
and the concerts I have seen. If you
appreciate good music performed
really well you'll enjoy Orleans.
Livingston Taylor In the Campus Center.
Folk-Rock Magic in Ballroom
by Naomi Friedlander
At certain, rare concerts occurs a
striking, almost magical moment
when audience and performers
merge, each entertaining each other.
This occurred Sunday night, when
Aztec Two-Step and Livingston
Taylor, lock-rock and country
musicians, performed in the Campus
Center Ballroom. From the beginning, the audience and performers
had reached out gropingly, hoping
to grasp and take on each other's
desires and capabilities. And then,
after fumbling, trying, failing, and
trying again, both listeners and
entertainers came together, interweaving the production of the
music and its absorption.
Association
Elections
Aztec 'Two-Step, comprised of
Ncal Shulman and Rex Fowler,
played first, beginning with one of
their most popular love songs, "Killing Me." From this, the group moved to newer material, songs like
"There Will Always Be a Faster
Gun" and "Humpty Dumpty and
Cinderella." The audience, though
largely unacquainted with these
songs, reacted warmly lo Aztec TwoStep's witty, humorous comments
and the flowing, rich style that
characterizes the group. The
musicians, who both play acoustic
guitar, are perfectly in tune vocally
and created swecharmoniousducts.
Self-Nomination forms will be available
for the following offices:
SA President
SA Vice President
Central Council
Class Officers
(1976, 1977)
overwhelming—we get the feeling
by C.S. Sintino
"A Woman Under the Influence," that Cassavetes had something very
John Cassavetes' new film, though potent here that went very wrong
energetic, well-acted, and impressive somewhere along the line.
in its subject matter, is a disappoinIt is some time into the film that
ting, unsatisfying and lopsided ex- we begin to realize that Mabel is
cercisc in a film style that can bcade- more than a slightly eccentric suburq u a t c l y termed
" p s e u d o - ban housewife. Mabel has sent her
documentary."
. three kids away with her mother so
What Cassavetes has attempted she can have some time alone with
with "A Woman Under the In- her husband, a construction worker
fluence" is a sensitive portrayal of a who is almost always seen in a fratcrwoman, Mabel (Gcna Rowlands) nity jacket and beach h a t who is suffering from ah increasingly affectations that arc not nearly as inserious mental disorder (apparently congruous as the woman he has
a schizophrenia of sorts) and the dif- married.
ficulties her well-meaning but
Nick, who has promised Mabel
emotional and simple-minded hus- this "date" for weeks, is unable to
band Nick (Peter talk) has dealing make it home because of an
with her. "Woman" has a few things emergency call—a broken water
going for it, most of all the incredibly main—that needs immediate attencharged performances of Falk, tion. Mabel ends her chainsmoking
Rowlands, and thesupporting cast. and pacing vigil for N ick and goes to
But the film's flaws arc a local bar where she allows herself
to be picked up, seemingly without
the slightest motivation. Nick,
though he is chauvinistic and unaware of her problems ("She can
cook, sew, wash—so what's the
problem?"), does love her in his own
banjo, piano, and a 1916 flute with simple way. Wc begin to wonder
acoustic guitar. In addition, Taylor what exactly is the problem with
and his group played popular songs Mabel. But Cassavcles' technique
by other artists. Taylor invested his (he wrote the script) of letting the
special mellow, lively flavor to songs story unfold itself in a strictly
like "Ma Cherie Amour," Rubber chronological fashion, with little
Ducky," "Little Help from my regard for (or misjudgement of)
Friends," and "1 Never Learned to what is important and what is trivial,
Dance," which, the artist said, makes the film ponderous and often
i "features me on the whistling." deathly,dull While wc wail for the
Taylor closed with two encores, significance of long and tedious
"Somewhere Over Ihc Rainbow" scenes to be revealed, Cassavetes
and "Thank You Song," conveying piles on even more, leaving some
in his vibrant quality his apprecia- scenes wholly unnecessary or in ncd
tion of the audience's warm, glowing of serious revision.
responses.
Mabel's problems are made painTaylor, who now only plays on fully obvious when he comes home
weekends, is working on a new the next morning with ten or so of his
album. "We're in the early stages, the construction buddies (Mabel's lover
embryonic stages of a new album. has fled) and she cooks them all a
No, as a matter ol fact, we're actually spaghetti breakfast. In addition to
at the birth. But if I don't get a record accepting Nick's fellow workers into
contract, I'm gonna shelve the whole the house without explanation.
idea for a year." Ihc performer, now Mabel exhibits some very strange
busy asa student at Boston Universi- behavior including a studied
ty, returned to school "a bunch of childlike courteousness in which she
years ago just to take college asks the workers in turn their names
courses."
and later sings with them. She seems
University Senate
SASU Student Assembly
MYSKANIA 1976
Alumni Board
The Ballroom, packed with a lull
house of 750 people, responded
enthusiastically to Aztec Two-Step's
performance. And the group was
equally fervid, returning to play
three encores, including "Prisoner"
and "The Persecution and Restoration of Dean Moriarty."
"Loved 'cm, great, you must express our general thanks to the
audience. You must write in the article how fantastic they were," Fowler
said alter the concert. Both he and
Shulman, happy about the concert,
were optimistic about their future
concerts and album. Discussing
when the album will be released,
Shulman said, "I don't even want lo
say when. Just that it will bcoul. We
accentuate the positive because it
will be out." The group, which has
been touring all winter, began working in Boston in 1971 and released
their album in 1972. Since then, they
have played all over the F.ast Coast
and hope that the second record will
bring about a major, cross-country
tour.
Livingston Taylor was equally
enthusiastic about the concert. "I
like Albany very much. I don't know
much about Albany but I like the
school very much. A beautiful concert and a beautiful audience—they
were really great." Taylor, accompanied by Bill Thiol on piano and
Walter Robinson on double bass,
played two encores, leaving the
audience clamoring lor more. Taylor
performed many of the audience's
requests, country favorites like
"Cornbread" and "Carolina Day."
The musician sang in his soft. South
Carolina drawl while alternating the
Nominations open Monday April 7, 9:00 am.
MICHAEL BERG
Nominations close Friday April 18, 5:00 pm.
&
Forms available in the SA Office, CC-346.
nultl -dimensional nine
performance
%
j
3Q
Also the Student Tax referendum will be held .
Funded by Student Association.
v
by Spence Uaggio and Matt Kaufman
Modern disciplined jazz, spiced
with Lalin rhythms this is Ihe
music of Argentine suxaphonisl
Gato Barbieri. Just recently at The
Bottom Line, Barbieri performed to
a friendly, politely subdued audience
(a pleasant change from the barbarous hordes of the Garden and the
Academy) with a confidence and
precision about his music that is
noticeably absent in too many of
today's roek musicians.
There was little verbal contact
between Barbieri and his audience.
The band walked onto the stage and,
immediately after the introduction,
began lo play, channeling their
energy directly into the music. Sub-
tle and unassuming, the music flows
about you and takesover your senses
almost before you realize it. Barbieri
keeps tight control over the music,
signalling with confident gestures,
everything on a smooth level but
with that undercurrent of tension
that makes listening to Ihe band enjoyable.
Although each member of the
band was given the opportunity to
solo, it's a case of the whole being
much stronger than the sum of the
parts. The rhythm section remained
a rhythm section, never breaking the
mood or balance of a composition,
never intruding in upon the front
line.
In Ihe beginning of the set, the
guitaristdid appear to he having dif-
0
MIAMI
BEACH
leaving this Sat. from
N.Y.C.
—accom. from $48.
—call for last minute
special reduced ratesl
—one-ways available
489-3639
ALBANY STUDENT PRESS
PAGE EIGHT
MARCH 20, 197J
MARCH 20, 1975
™:„)
What we arc left arc a number of
sketchy bits and pieces, any one of
which, expanded, would have
resulted in a powerful exploration of
a not so uncommon problem. Still.
"A Woman Under the Influence"
does have a few things to its advantage, for instance the depiction of
ihe phenomenon we all know so
well, "the awkward moment." Nick's
continued inability to say or do the
right thing at the right time often
makes one squirm in his seat with
cmbarrassmcntforNick. The best example of this is when Nick invites a
lew dozen people to his house for
Mabel's homecoming from the
hospital, hut tells them it's better if
they go home. As they arc leaving.
Mabel is just arriving. But these infrequent moments can't save the film
from being much more than a wcllintcntioned failure-Cassavetes has
provided us with a classic example ol
biting off more than you can chew.
Barbieri's Spicy Precise Jazz
$69! Roundtrip
Elections will be Tuesday April 29-Friday May 2.
like nothing so much at a petty kid
sister and Nick treats her as such.
As the film progresses, Mabel's
behavior becomes harder for Nick to
ignore and finally,after awhile, Nick
decides to have her committed. She
spends six months in an institution
but returns not much for the better.
Cassavetes appears to have a
number of directions in which he
wanted the film to go, but none of
them are developed to the point
where wc could identify one as the
theme with any sort of critical,
assuredness. As a message about the,
way we treat madness in our society,,,
the film is weak because Nick, whose
relationship with Mabel is Ihe only
developed one, can hardly represent
society w ithin the context of the film.
Society's other elements arc evident
in the film, yet are never really explored. The doctor who commits
her, Nick's mother, and Mabel's
parents are only alottcd token
positions in the film. As a study of
Nick and Mabel it is weak because
Mabel, as half the marriage, is virtually inoperative- she can't react to
Nick. And it fails as a study of Nick
because, as the title of the film
suggests, much of the film's I ight is
thrown on Mabel's dilemma.
ALBANY STUDENT PRESS
CHARTER
BUSES
to all N.V. areas leaving
t o m o r r o w for Easter
Recess, returning Sun,
April 6. Call for reservations
489-9639 or 472-5303
ficulties. H is lead s were, at limes, ex-*,
cessively choppy and poorly ex-'
ecuted. He managed to achieve a
piercing lone that interfered with,
rather than complimented, the other
musicians', it was too sharp, it contrasted loo strongly. Gradually,
though, he began to grow more comfortable on sUigc, sliding more easily
into the music.
Barbieri himself is excellent on the
sax, and has many aesthetically
sound musical ideas. No massappeal artist, Barbieri is well suited
to the lub scene, where he apparently
already enjoys a large measure of
popularity.
The warm-up group was Billie
I'urdie's band, five musicians who
seemed to beokl friends lo the crowd
at The Bottom Line. Forced due to
sickness to play without their
guitarist, they carried on quite well.
The high point of their set was a
Stevic Wonder song during which
Barbieri's tuba player und AWB's
new drummer joined I'urdicon stage
lo help out. They were u last minute
replacement for Michal Urbaniuk's
Fusion, who reportedly was forced
lo cut his engagement short due lo
drummer problems, but they left
alter about an hour lo loud warm
applause from the audience.
PAGE NINE
ssasBMiasmws*'**'*!*'
'*>****+ ^-J-™tf»tf «*!
•lack
::
leather
Brubacher
oumw i:B
1
jacket,
3/17,
lost
Chris a n d t o r i ,
at
Saturday.
Two
Yott b o t h w a n t e d l» a n d you both
buttons w a r * misting a n d lining In left
g o t it. G o a h e a d , p a l yourselves on
pocket ripped. C a l l Steve 4 8 2 - 7 3 7 6 .
your back. Fuck e v e r y b o d y else.
lost: G o l d
alone
P.S. R e m e m b e r to r e a d those boods
Stuyvesont
or mother will b e very m a d . And
P l a z a a n d campus. Much sentimental
b e t i d e s , good girls don't d o that.
W h o else but M.E.S.
'Fuller
o p a l ring,. 3 / 1 5
Road
betwe'en
v a l u e . R e w a r d . If f o u n d , call D e b b y
Furf:
at 457-7763.
W e h a v e acheived the ultimate!
FOR SALE
light moves, locally. Weekends.
Cheap. 438-0697.
' lost:
HS
ring,
Scotia-Glenville-73,
size5, r e d , LSK, r e w a r d , 3 9 9 - 4 3 0 4 .
Congratulations. M S N
Beginning piano lessons from music
major. Call Lorri, 7-7862.
Olympus Psr-'t. 1.2 lent. S1S0.00,
4898894aft* 7p.m.
Typing: Professional quality, quick
service, reasonable rates. 237-0858.
Fu ju 10 speed in very good condition,
$130. Price discussable, call 4632917,4360262.
Medical, Dental & law School
Applicants: Have you applied for
1975 classes, but without success so
far? Perhaps we can help you get an
acceptance. Box 16140, St. Louis, Mo.
63105.
New ftowmar MX-100 calculator,
$130.00. Call 465-0015.
HOUSING
Wanted: 3 bedroom apartment:
$180 to $220; on busline, call Pat,
457-7924.
Roommate needed to share
apartment—occupancy on or near
Moy 1st. 4654292.
,
Nice apartment to sublet with other
male college students. On SUNY
busline
w/carpetina.
washer/dryer, good friendly
atmosphere, furnished. Call 4729518.
Furnished unhealed 3 bedroom flat,
suitable 3 girls, 55 Partridge.
Four bedroom .and 2 bedroom
apartments located on Western
Avenue. Call evenings 869-5291.
One bedroom, unfurnished, heat
and hot water, range, refrigerator,
$120, 463-7183, Gay Preferred.
9
Female roommate needed to live in
very comfortable apt. ideally
located.Ownbedroom,$80/mo. Day
or night, 489-7168.
Beautiful,
clean,
fully
furnishedapartment with wall to wall
carpeting on the busline. Good
location. Rent very reasonable.
Roommates wanted for next year or
this summer or both. Call Fred, 4895712, anytime.
I
Typing < my home near SUNY e x p e r i e n c e d P h . D . Thesis,
Manuscripts - Pat Jones 438-1450.
Manuscript Typing Service 869-5225.
Typing done in my home. 482-8432.
Tping done in my home, 869-2474.
Overseas Jobs Australia, Europe, S.
America, Africa. Students all
professions and occupations $700 to
$3000 monthly. Expenses paid,
o v e r t i m e , sightseeing. Free
information. Transworld research Co.
Dept. B5, PO Box 603, Corte Madera,
CA 4925.
Righteous "Foreign" Auto Repair,
specializing in Volvos, 501 Yates
Street
near
corner
of
MadisokOntario. Phone 438-5546.
Classical Guitar lessons. BeginnerAdvanced, 456-1201. ' ' " " ' "'"'
Passport/Application photos taken
Monday
7-9 p.m. Returned
Thursdays. Sign up on Campus
Center 305 door. Karyn, 7-2116.
Joel & Juan Luis "etc."
To the Caledonia KidHappy Birthday. Thank you for
everything. Butespecially for caring,
me
Jim Becker
Don't laugh at secret admirers.
YOUR secret admirer
Happy Birthday lieutenant! Well, I
couldn't think of anything else to say
at the moment. I'll try harder next
time when maybe I have more brain?
Cynthie
To: Ed lub., Joanne andthe scum of
the earth in 702 Dutch. Write to
Spain.
W.R.M.
Little B.Because you're understanding,
because you look like an angel even
in the morning, because you cried
when I did, I love you.
Honey
Fat Pat,
Happy birthday! We'll make YOU
'mothers'!
Congratulations to the whalers. You
boys finally pulled one out. Good luck
to the colonists who also played a fine
game.
L.H.
Robin,
Am I off the list yet? I hope so.
Yours,
Macjock
Dearest Jeanie,
Been one hell of a year! Who'd
have evr thought that 2 h.b.'s could
do so well?! The second one can only
be better.
Love,
Doug
Goody Two ShoesSix Month .. . Fantastic! I love you
Sugar
John Wayne
Dad,
Thanks alot for that fucking Hell
Letter
Connecticut.Yankee,
., >
I (definitely now) am "redding"
whenever you are— and I
(absolutely) 'wantagh."
Dee
Your Son (JJgA
Charlie (dressing-room streaker),
Don't catch tuna in Fla. You don't
w a n t tuna with good taste. You w a n t
tuna that tastes g o o d .
Billie Jean,
Should we give something to
Harvey?
Sports
(me too!) Lil " g "
H a p p y Birthday!
Love,
W a n t e d • F M car radio a n d 8-track
MMI'd like to lake this rare opportunity
(when my hands aren't busy), to wish
you a very happy 20th. By the way,
have I told you that . . .
•The Pen
El
t a p e deck. C a l l S a n d r a , 7-5184.
D e a r Dudith,
Rubber b o a t a n d motor. After 7 p.m.
489-8894.
H a p p y Birthday Petunia Fishl Stay
great!
Love,
Drummer a n d / o r bass w a n t e d for
S.H.
M u c h original m a t e r i a l . Call M i k e
472-6478.
7019,
Secret
457-5184.
Violette,
Happy Birthday!!!!
Jim Becker
admirers
have
names.
Mine's A n n .
Love,
All your Mauravian friends
Bio. major w h o knows everything! For
4/3/75
in-depth night of research call I r a , 7-
To Ihe best roommate ever,
Have a great birthday! I'm glad
you didn't go.
Lucky met
C a r radio or tapedeck. Sandra- 438-
Apartment
mate
needed
immediately to share 4-bedroom
apartment near busline. $50 plus
utilities, vegetarian preferred. 4624749.
donel
Wanted: One 6'1" blue-eyed male to
chauffer me in my purple
Monteverde while vacationing in
Brazil. Desperate. Jennifer O'Neill
some fun with Hendrix based guitar.
Person wants own room in apt. or
house near busline for summer and
fall. Call Mark, 482-6893.
Congratulations on a job well
P6RSONALT = =
D e a r Judi,
WANTED
8714.
HELP WANTED
D e a r Fran:
Thank you! No ulcers next year,
Furnished apartment $185, Western
Avenue brownstone, on busline,
double studio, large kitchen, porch,
utilities included. 456-2149.
Two people needed to share
"tremendous" room in white house
directly across from Western Ave.
entrance toSUNYA—for Fall 7 5 and
Spring 7 6 semesters. Call Larry or
Dennis, 489-7985.
Female: b e a u t i f u l , t a l e n t e d , n o exp.
Love,
wirters. Pay is unusual but generous.
Tom
Apply in person • Alden Hall 261 or
P.S. S a m e time, same place, next
2 6 2 any night after 10.
year!! I'll be back.
RlbETRlDERf^^
WANTED
Little P u d g e ,
bennetwho would ever believe you and
me together
Happy 20th Birthday
Wed. night lets not just sleep.
lovingly
I'm going to miss you.
Love,
Your Lady
Ride w a n t e d for bicycle from L.I. to
SERVICES
Dear champ,
I promise you the best vacation
possible, Weve come pretty far and
hopefully we'll go even further.
Ken
OK?
n e e d e d to run affairs of two friendly
SUNYA • April 7. Will pay. Carole,
JSS,
Monmouth,
Boston,
Dipplkill • I
Love,
Trucking—Need to move your
belongings home? Call Don, 4624749.
Girl looking forapartment, or room.in
house. $65/mo., heat Included. Call
Mindy, 457-3247.
Ride
wanted-will
Shoperama,
share
Rotterdam
expenses.
-
Phyllis 4 5 7 - 4 7 1 0 , will return call.
__•
Nebish,
1
Four man apartment wanted near
busline. Danny, 472-5736.
$200 per month- modern, centrally
air-conditioned duplex apartment,
convenient location, 2 bedrooms.
Call 459-6400, If no answer, 4597352.
Special thanks to Billy Heller a n d his
19 is pretty old. M a y b e you should
Coop
LOST&FOUND
•
Foreign Car Repairs
M a y the rays of the sun bring you
lost: 1976 A q u a m a r i n e SUNY ring,
1
days ol (un. ENJOY.
initials RC on inside. Please call Rob
Love,
3 7 1 - 6 3 0 5 . Reward $ 1 0 . 0 0 .
toil O l d
Shaeffer
red-brown
Your p a i n in the nock
pen.
G e n e r a t i o n p e n , Lost lower Patroon
Lounge, M a r c h 4. R e w a r d , Call 355
0 2 7 6 , ask for Will.
Lost, Siberian Husky, t a n a n d white,
Zigay.
Vacations come and go but what
two people have together can stand
the test of time, any amount of time.
Two weeks or three months mean
nothing compared to the eternities
we've already spent together.
Your 5-foot-3, brown-eyed girl
P.S. But I'll stitl miss you terribly
Dear H.
No good times or bad times • just
the New York Times
-E.
To everyone who has helped me and
been with me over these past few
hard weeks, especially my sister Sue,
JoAnne.and the Kens,
Thanks.
Love,
Didi
After much deliberation (it seems
Colonial Quad guys get betterall the
time) THE STUD of the MONTH
COMMITTEE has chosen Karl Fritton
as their March Stud.
Attention: There will be a forty-five
(45) calendar day time limit for
grievances to be filed with the SA
Ombudsman. To allow students with
problems extending back to the
beginning of the 74-75 school year to
file grievance forms, a thrity (30) day
"open" period has been established.
During this "open" period the fortyfive day deadline will not be in
effect.
This "open" period ends April 19,
after which the time limit well be
adhered to.
Jonathan Levenson
Ombudsman
Sandy:
To the best bumper in the office.
Keep moving those hips.
Chapter 22
" F r i d a y night, March 14,
Niskeyuna down by two, M.B. at the
line . . . "
(Excerpts from that controversial new
book, Rebuttal)
nafi AH for mm.
th
SHiduif
_______•_•
rfttt
In two wt*h
Instead, he bowed to discretion
and shattered his right shoulder in a
thudding crash that changed the life
of Joe Garagiola.
T h a t accident didn't exactly
knock me out of baseball, but it
helped," the jovial, bald-pated
bricklayer's son said.
Instead of pursuing a baseball
career he turned to pursuing the
players as one of the busiest, most
A. M. I. A. Cont'd
Continued from page 12
headache this year" said Cohn.
"Teams have repeatedly misinterpreted our rules which require
that every participant sign the
medical-team roster form PRIOR to
participating in any A.M.l.A. event.
Failure to do so results in forfeiture
o f that event by the ineligible player's
team, and possible suspension of the
violator(s)."
"Teams may add players to their
rosters up till their third games," Altman said, "But no one can play until
they have signed the team-roster.
Another new rule opens rosters to
transfers at mid-year for the first
three weeks of the semester, but no
person who was in school during the
previous semester may sign without
first appealing to the Council. This
rule is designed to prevent so-called
'ringers'."
"Our medical regulations have not
changed," said Cohn. "We have
simply re-statcd the facts regarding
health requirements."
A.M.l.A. also reminds all players
that no one may play in an A.M.l.A.
event unless they have paid student
tax.
Lacrosse Cont'd
Continued from pane 12
Alter completing the spring swing
through the South where ihey will
play Vl'l, Georgia Tech, and the
Atlanta Lacrosse Club, the Danes
come home to face the Oswego Cireal
Lakers, in the season opener. The
learn to beal according to
Armstrong has gol in be Genesee,
especially alter their strong showing
in last year's liCAC tournament.
Other top clubs on this years
schedule include: the Brockport
Golden Eagles, a very tough' Ithaca
squad, and Long Island powerhouse
C'.W. Post, in addition to the
number two and three teams in last
years IICAC tournament RIT and
11 art wick respectively.
successful and highest paid of the
sports broadcasters.
More than that, be his become
somethilig of an institution in the
nation's living rooms as television
talk show host, game show masterof .
ceremonies, huckster and commentator.
He was making $12,000 a year
when he quit baseball in 1954—four
years after the Robinson incident —
to take the microphone for the St.
Louis Cardinals. Now he is paid
more than most of the sport's
superstars and has the highest identity factor of any television sports
figure with the possible exception of
Howard Coscll.
As he swept through Ihe Florida
training camps last week putting
together film for his "Baseball World
of Joe Garagiola" series on NBC—
principally the one hour feature,
"Next Year Is Here," to be televised
April 6—the friendly, garrulous onetime catcher stole the limelight from
the game's biggest personalities.
Kids lined up for autographs and
old timers efcowed their way past Pirates, Chicago Cubs and New
Lou Brock and Willie Surge- to York Giants.
shake his hand.
"I thought I was modeling unSuccess hasn't spoiled Garagiola, iforms," he a y s of hit diamond
the Italian kid from St. Lou_"*Hill.~ career
The earthy quality has proven to
He was just 20 and fresh out of Ute
be a strong Garagiola asset. Army when he caught for the Car"Anthony Quinn said once you're dinals in the 1946 Work) Series
poor if you're never rich," Joequips. against the Boston Red Sox.
Undoubtedly Joe could be richer
"When Ted Williams came to bat I
than he is. Within Ihe past couple of didn't know whether to call a pitch
years he has abandoned a $7S,000-a- or ask for hit autograph," he says.
year job asa tegular on the Today"
It was in 1950 at Ebbets Field in
show, ended lucrative contracts as a ' Brooklyn when Garagiola, trying to
game show host and cut down heavi- beat out a hit, crashed head first tryly on personal appearances.
ing to avoid stepping on Robinson.
The Garagiolas live in Scarsdale, He suffered broken ribs and a
N.Y., have a penthouse apartment in shattered shoulder and never threw
Marco Island, Fla., where he is con- well after that.
nected with a land development
firm. They have two sons and a
daughter.
Garagiola, 49. the son of an immigrant Italian, grew up across the
street from Yogi Bcrra. He spent
eight years in the National League as
a left-handed hitting catcher for the
St. Louis Cardinals, Pittsburgh
Holtzman To Step Down
NEW YORK (AP) Eddie
Donovan will be the New York
Knicks' gneral manager next year,
leaving Red llol/man to continue as
coach of the National Basketball
Association team, the New York
Daily News reported in its Thursday
edition.
For the past five years, Donovan
has been vice-president and general
manager of the Buffalo Braves.
Donovan was general manager of
the Knicks until the 1970-71 season,
when he resigned to join the Braves.
At that time, llol/man, who has
coached the Knicks since I967-6K,
then assumed the general manager's
post as well.
Burke ousts lloltnnan
Earlier this season, llol/man was
Allegheny
slashes air fates for
. . . smal groups«___.,
Our new 4 to 9 Plan
cuts roundtrip air fares
up to 20%.
Allegheny's new savings plan
is great for any kind of small
group. Because it can save you
money. Here's how it works.
Just put together a group
of 4 to 9 people. Then make
reservations and purchase tickets
at least 48 hours ahead of time.
Fly together to and from selected
cities and stay at least 3 daysbut no more than thirty. Leave
before noon on Monday through
Friday—anytime on weekends.
It's ideal for going home, to
that big game or concert. Or to
get away over semester break.
And when your family comes
to see you, they can save. Up
to 20% for adults. Up to 50%
for children under 12 when
accompanied by at least one
passenger 12 or older.
That's all there is to it.
So, see your Travel Agent
or call Allegheny for information and reservations. You'll
see how big a break your little
group can get on Allegheny.
1
Volvo
MG TRVW
and others
Danny OI sure hope you were a g o o d boy
this w e e k . You'll get Hell from your
father if you weren't
A fruily relative
M a r c h 8 o n campus, R e w a r d , 4 3 9 -
Righteous Auto
501 Yatot Stroel
438-5546
prompt service—fair rates
COMMUNITY
SERVICE
REGISTRATION
April 9th—16th
Between LC 3 and 4
9am—4pm
M e d i c a l and Legal
Placements
Thuri,, April 10 only!
MARCH 20, 1975
I m a g i n e a n order of
2 2 , 0 0 0 priests a n d brothers in
7 3 countries a r o u n d t h e w o r l d .
(That's a pretty b i g family.)
But that's w h a t t h e
Salesians of St. J o h n Bosco
a r e all a b o u t — a l a r g e family
of c o m m u n i t y - m i n d e d m e n
d e d i c a t e d to t h e service o f '
youth. ( A n d n o o n e g e t s lost.)
In Italy in t h e 1800's a c h a n c e meeting b e t w e e n a poor
priest a n d a street urchin s e r v e d to c r e a t e a movement of such
success that it is still g r o w i n g t o d a y . D o n Bosco b e c a m e the
priest w h o brought youth b a c k from I h e streets — a n d
b a c k to G o d .
H e r e a s o n e d that a p r o g r a m of play, t e a m a n d pray w o u l d
m a k e useful citizens of the w o r l d . H e c r o w d e d out evil w i t h
reason, religion a n d kindness I n a ( w h a t w a s then u n h e a r d of)
atmosphere of family.
T h e ideals of St. J o h n B o s c o a r e still with us today. H i s .
work goes o n in boys clubs, t e c h n i c a l a n d a c a d e m i c schools,
guidance centers, s u m m e r c a m p s a n d missions. A n d his very
h u m a n a p p r o a c h is very evident In the family spirit of the
Salesians. This is the way h e w a n t e d It. This is the way It is.
The Saloslan e x p e r i e n c e Isn't learned — it's lived.
For more Information about Salesfan Priests and
Brothers, mail this coupon t o :
Fattier Joseph Mattel, 8.O.B. Room A- 2 5 *
i Salesians
i
i
i
i
OF ST. JOHN BOSCO
Box 639. Now Hocholla, N.Y. 10802
I am Inloroslod In Ihe Prioslhood Q
i
ALLEGHENY
Street Address _
CHy—
Phone -
America's 6th largest passenger-carrying airline.
,
Brolhethood | _
* • »
.
.Stele.
I
Education .
|43371
MARCH 20, 1975
ALBANY STUDENT PRESS
reportedly told by Mike Burke,
president of Madison Square Garden which owns the Knicks, to relinquish one of his posts.
There was some question as to
whether llol/man would accept being relieved of part of his command
to Donovan but he reportedly has
expressed no mpposition to (he
return of his former boss.
Join lh_
lhird biggest
family in tire
world.
i
ha* t Hapft......
2847.
PAGE TEN
by Will Grlmsley
St. Petersburg, Fla.,(AP) If he had
been a more ruthless man, Joe Garagiola might have dug a spike into
one of Jackie Robinson's outstreched ankles and changed baseball
history.
camera
lie about your a g e ! H a p p y B i r t h d a y .
Dear Sunshine,
Free room, board (private room, TV,
bath) in exchange for babysitting.
Car necessary, 869-8526.
Barry,
Yei, it's really for you and I finally
made it. Have a Happy Birthday
tomorrow I
Love,
L
Garagiola Remembers Robinson
W e ' r e gonna miss you
SUNYA.
Arrive M W F 9 : 0 0 - 5 : 0 0 approx. Call
D«or U i l i * . .
Pltaw fafgtvt us f i r mailing
things up • w«'r« rtally sorry.
Love
B.B. ondC.K.
wlftll mill,
Doug,
Mosquito (DJP)
T
» i * i » i _ > •* TT"
Risa
n e e d you!
457-8804.
l«p,
»
.
E.G.
Borogue lute with hord cue. Call
Alan, 462-8997.
ii i—
ALBANY STUDENT PRESS
*
Your Current Jet*
•
PAGE ELEVEN
University oi New York at Albany
Thunday, Match 2 0 , 1 9 7 5
Albany To Host SUNY-CUNY All Star Game
Koola, Panaggio, And Robota To Lead SUNY Team
by Nithm Silent
The State University of New York
and theCity University of New York
have announced plans for a SUNYCUNY All Star Game to be played
April 14 at 8 p.m. in the Albany University Gymnasium.
Teams will be composed of 10
seniors selected by the Conference
Coaches. (NCAA rules forbid participation of players other than
seniors who have completed their 4
years of eligibility in these types of
events.) Selections of the squads will
be announced March 31.
Brock port's Mauro Panaggio
drew the honor of coaching the
SUNY team, thanks to Brockport's
winning the SUNY Conference.
(The Golden Eagles finished 4th in
the nation in the NCAA Tournament last weekend.) Albany State's
Doctor Richard Sauers will serve as
Panaggio's assistant.
Ed Kramer, head coach ol'CUNY
Conference-winning
Lehman
College, will lead the CUNY Stars,
assisted by CCNY's Floyd Lane, a
member of the 1950 CityCollcgc
NCAA and NIT Champions.
"It's about time we got this natural
rivalry going," said Sauers, "And
with state-wide radio and television
coverage a strong possibility, the
non-scholarship athletes of both
Conferences will get some much
needed, publicity."
"We hope to make this an annual
affair," said Tournament Director
David Halbcrstram. "Right now
there is very little in the way of interconference play or rivalry, and we
hope to change that in the next few
years."
Robota, Koola selected
Ed Robota of Clcncsco State is expected to lead the SUNY All Star
Player list. Albany Stale's lone
senior Pete Koola was also among
those selected from the 22 SUNY
candidates.
Stan "The Man" Brown,CUNY's
all-time leading scorer from Lehman
College, will top the listol'CUNY
Stars.
A preliminary contest is planned,
hopefully involving the State
Legislature's basketball team, with
Hugh Carey as a referee. Possible
opponents include a Capital District
Bankers' Association team, or an
A.M.I.A. All Star Squad.
Admission will be $ I for students tion Building at Albany University,
and $2 for adults. Tickets sales are , from 10-12 and 1-4 p.m. during the
scheduled to begin April 7, in the week proceeding the game, and on
Main Office of the Physical Educa- the night of the contest.
Lacrosse Preview
by Craig Bell
The 1975 Lacrosse season opens
for the Great Dames April 9 and
both coach Dave Armstrongand the
team are eagerly awaiting.
The team will be out to improve
upon last seasons mark with a year
of experience under their belt.
Although only 4-7 last year, "the
record is deceiving says Dane coach
Armstrong. Four of those games we
lost by one goal. In addition our
other losses were at the hands of the
top three teams in the ECAC Tournament lust year, namely Gcnesco,
RIT, and Hartwick."
Armstrong, who played his
college Lacrosse for Ball State,
where he was captain all four years
while playing goalie, is very optimistic. With 19 returning veterans,
indeed he should be.
Starters back from last year include leading scorers Steve Schaus
and Pete Connor. Both Pete and
Steve will be at the midfield spot and
will most likely be joined by Arnie
Will or Dennis Walsh. The thing that
Armstrong is most pleased about is
the number of peopleavailable to fill
the midfield slot. Right now says
Armstrong, "I'd like to and I think
I'll be able to run four lines of midfielders."
The attack shapes up in this
manner. Speedy sophomore Terry
Brady from Holy Trinity High
School (L.l.) will play behind. The
second attack spot right now belongs
to freshman Danny Coggin. "Danny
is very quick and posses an excellent
shot." The third spot as of now is up
for grabs. Those in contention for
the position Larry Robinowicz,
Kevin Hilly, and Bob Williams, all
sophomores.
The defense, which Armstrong
considers the key to success, will be
anchored by junior defenscman Bill
Jonat. "Jonat, a big 6'3" 200
pounder, is quick and has an excellent stick. Because of this he will
cover the other teams' top scorer."
Joe Mullen, who Armstrong refers
to us "big, mean and nasty," has the
second spot and both Dave Ahonen
and Kevin Murphy will battle for the
third and final spot.
In the nets Albany will havceither
returning goalie Bob Wulkiewic/,
Kenny Alverson, a freshman from
New Hyde Park or Prank Villanova.
Taking a look at the Danes
Schedule . . .Continued on page II
inIK
1
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;
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holt
Albany State* Pete Koola, the lone senior on t h i Dane squad, and only Dane on the all-SUNY team
In action during the 1974-75 season.
c
A. M. I. A. Adopts New Policies
The Association of Men's Intramural Athletics (A.M.I.A.)
Council recently adopted and formalized a set of policies involving
such matters a s : eligibility, scheduling of events, fighting penalties,
bond money, rosier, etc.
"We felt that it was time to re-state
our many bylaws and rules," said
A.M.I.A. President David M. Colin.
"We have heard loo many protests
and complaints regarding matters
which are stated at meetings, hut
mis-understood. Now, everything
will be in writing, nad the team
representative at the meeting will be
required to sign a statement
acknowledging that he/she has read
our policy and eligibility rule
sheets."
"We have experienced a great deal
of trouble regarding postponement
of games," said Nolan Altinan,
chairman of the A.M.I.A. Ad Hock
Committee on Rules and Policies.
"Our new policy statement makes it
clear that postponements must be
made at least 4X hours in advance of
the scheduled game, thai the team
seeking the postponement musl contact the other team involved and ob- •
tain that teams' agreement, that ihe
postponing teams must find two
teams to play in Ihe time-slot they
are vacating, and thai all four involved captains must individually
contact Ihe A.M.I.A. Office at least
4S hours in advance of the scheduled
game to announce their agreement
to postpone."
lighting Rule
Sllckmen In action last year against MWdlebury.
"Unfortunately, we occasionally
face the problem of fights in
A.M.I.A. activities," said Mark
Wechsler, co-chairman of the ud hoc
committee. "In the past, the Council
hits never hud a definite fighting rule.
Now, new rulesspecifically state that
any player who lights with another
player shall be suspended on the
spot, and musl appear at the next
A.M.I.A. Council meeting. If it is a
first offense, his/her name must be
placed on the new fighting list, and
he/she may be suspended at the discretion of the Council. Second
offenders shall automatically be
suspended for a period to be determined by the Council. Once a name
isplaced onthefightinglist.itwill remain there for the remainder of the
lighter's stay at the university."
"Anyone who lights with an
A.M.I.A. Official or Student Assistant on duty shall immediately be
suspended, must appear al the next
Council meeting, and must be
suspended for a period to be determined by the Council."
"Many people come lo us inquiring about bond money," said
A.M.I.A. Treasurer Nai Salanl,
"and now il is explained lo nil on a
set policy form, Basically. A.M.I.A.
reserves ihe righl lo collect bond
money lor any events the Council
deems it necessary for. Such money
must be deposited in our SA account. Its purpose is lo guarantee
that teams do not forfeit, as forfeits
cause scheduling problems and
usually ruin leagues.
Currently, we are forced to keep
$2 out of every $ 10 we colled, as per
SA requirements in our budget."
"The problem of participants not
signing rosters has been our major
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SAN CLEMENTE, California (AP) When questioned about his chances
for being a Presidential candidate in 1976 Richard Nixon said that he would
either run and seek the votes of the silent majority or "stand pat." When
further questioned about Ford's chances in '76 he added, "that things would
go right if they came out with a Mustang or maybe a new edition of the
Fairlane."
ASPEN, Colorado (UP1) Special Assistant to the President Jean-Claude
Killy said that the entire country is going downhill in the midst of this snowDr. Janey Hoopingcough, job.
SUNYA Health Services director
ALLEGHANY, Pennsylvania (AP) Sources here have definite evidence thai
said, "The psychological consefamed heiress and fugitive Patty Hearst remained at a nearby farm. In a note
quences of having no pinball
left by her she stated that she refuses to accept the nomination of Go vernor of
machines on campus could be
California, but left her options open for a Supreme Court appointment.
devastating to the student body."
Hoopingcough forsees a massive rise
HUE, South Vietnam (UPI) Seven North Vietnamese soldiers threatened
in neurotic behavior among students to sue the United States government for cases of food poisoning contracted
if new machines aren't installed from confiscated C-Rations.
soon.
WASHINGTON D.C. (UPI) Ralph Nader on behalf of the government said
Students are already showing
that if the poisoned Viet Cong soldiers try to settle a claim with their
signs of stress due to the absense of
insurance company Sutz & Sutz the U.S. Government will cut off all aid to
pinball machines. Just today an estimated 500 SUNYA students North Vietnam.
attended funeral services for the late
TEHERAN, Iran (AP) Secretary of State Henry Kissinger issued a formal
"Yukon" machine. The reamins of foreign policy statement this morning to the effect that for four thousand
"Yukon" were buried just beneath gallons of crude oil the Unite States will turn over to the Arabs, the state of
the flagpoles in front of the academic Wyoming and the entire blue section of the Houston Astrodome for the seven
podium. One sobbering student was game schedule of the Oiler games. They also threw in an oi) change and a
overheard as saying, "Yukon was a 10,000 mile checkup for Air Force One. v W f t » *
great friend, what'll we do without
NEW YORK, New York (AP) The Dow Jones Average closed slightly
it?'
lower today as traders took stock certificates down to the Daily News Office
so that they could be made into recycled paper products.
The Ma* Peiball Bomber, afterdeetroylng SUNYA'a gam* room, taavea with the"Yukon"
by Dug Hoarwidz
The Mad Pinball Bomber has
struck again and with this latest
bombing the alst of the pinball
machines has disappeared from teh
SUNYA campus. Karl Scranton,
director of SUNYA security, announced, "We have some excellent
leads in this case which should result
in an arrest within the next few
days." Scranton would not comment
on who thebombermight be .heonly
said, "There's a sicky loose out there
and he or she must be stopped before
more terrible destruction is unleashed."
Aphrodite
Scranton revelaed that there has
been a noticeable pattern to the
bombings. Oddly enough, the
machines have been destroyed in
alphabetical order. "Yukon" was the
last victim to go. In addition, type
written notes have been found
among the rubble of each of the
fallen machines. Each note has simple read, "I've Anally beaten this
machine!"
Ken Waxears who is president of
the SUNYA Pinball Advisory Committee is hopeful that SA will appropriate enough funds to resupply
the campus with new machines.
However, Pat Curin, SA president,
stated that no funds will be released
until the Mad Bomber is apprehended and put behind bars.
Curin's statement didn't settle well
with members of the Pinball Club
who threatened a mass demonstration within the SA offices if new
• machines aren't installed immediately.
Ex-President Nixon to Speak
• by Paola Summerhill
Tonight Richard M. Nixon,
former President and felon, will
speak in the SUNYA Gym beginning
at 8 p.m. The event is being cosponsored by Speaker's Forum and
the Criminal Justice Department.
Admission is free but donations will
be accepted for the Nixon defense
fund.
When asked why Mr. Nixon
decided to break his self-imposed exile at Albany State, Mr. Nixon
replied "Why not." The topic of
tonight's speech will be "How in less
than two years after receiving a
tional mandate you can become a
tional disgrace." Other topics to
be included are "How to live in five
states and pay taxes in none of them"
and "Who really caused the eighteen
minute gap."
Mr. Nixon heatedly denied the
rumor that he was going to star in a
remake of "The Fugitive." Mr. Nixon said he looked nothing like David
Jansen.
According to sources close to the
former President, the reason for his
lecture is money. He was overheard
saying if crooks like Ziegler and
Dean can make money so can I.
Of course there have been rumors
that his real reason to coming on
campus is that he is a candidate for
the President of the University.
BERLIN, West Germany (AP) East German officials filed a formal
complaint with the United Nations that they would not hesitate to take
military action if the West Germans did not cease writing graffiti on the
When I asked present President Berlin Wall. Such things were written as "Your mother cuts sauerkraut with a
Benezet about this rumor he said, bayonet" and "Adolf Eats It."
"Maybe Dean of Arts and Sciences
but not President of the University."
TEL AVIV, Israel (UPI) The Israeli government claimed that they didn't
Many people on campus fell that it violate the cease fire bydropping 11,000 knishes and cheese danishes on
is all a publicity stunt and that Mr. Aswan, Egypt. The tactical maneuver was called a "blintzkrieg."
Nixon is not coming to the UniversiALBANY, New York (AP) Students at the State University here were put
ty at all. When I spoke to speaker impersonator Ken Wax (remember down during violent demonstrations for the repea of their meal contracts.
Hunter Thompson), he said he had Demonstrators threw hamburgers, spaghetti, American chop sucy.
not been rehearsing the Checkers qcrambled eggs and chicken at police and National Guards who were
reportedly too "grossed out" to stay. They retaliated with tear gas but
Speech.
Finally many people are expecting students said they welcomed any kind of gas ther than the twelve varieties
a guest appearance by ormer Vice- that they were accustomed to. Red Cross were on hand to take care ol
President Agnew. The agency who stomach pains, acne, and cuts and bruises sustained from wh ipped crea m and
signed on Mr. Nixon said this was soup.
highly unlikely but hinted there was
BROOKLYN, New York (AP) As unemployment increases and layoffs
an outside chance of Martha
become more and more prcrvalent as the Mafia 4,000 employees in the
Mitchell showing up.
Canarsie area. Some were fired on the Belt Parkway, others in local
restaurants and few others were "blown away" at a local meeting place called
Vinnie's Boom Boom Room.
i.
Holidays!r
WASHINGTON D.C. (AP) Chairman for the Senate Committee on Sale
Driving, Wilbur Mills made a statement today concerning adoption ol three
new highway safety features, prescription wind shields, roads without cun es
and chauffeurs.
"Albany would be a nice place to live if you didn't
have to take classes here." How many times have you
heard that ? Yet whenever you get a day off, everyone
takes off for home, or for Florida, or for the Poconos,
or somewhere. Well we've done something about it.
Last week Central Council passed the "Break your ass
and what do you get for it" bill for special Suprise
Holidays! No one will know when they will be...Us,
Teachers, Students, God...Anyone!
We have a
special monkey at a typewriter. Whenever he types out
"Pat Curran"...you've got a day off! You just come to
class and there's a sign on the door:"AU Classes
Cancelled". And too late to go anywhere! Whoopee!
Fun for everyone! Ha Cha!
Enjoy it folks,
Courtesy of Your Student Government
!« & * * « * * * * * * * •
PAGE 2K
iMmmmimmiMlUlMMUX
KICK-IN-THE-ASP
Tendencies Phgue SUMYA Stub*
by Wild Man Mayer
A study conducted by the Psychology Department for the State
Department of Health reveals that
most students in Albany State university have suicidal tendencies. The
startling conclusion that 37% of the
student body has seriously considered taking their life, with an additional 4% waiting for their final
remarks to arrive, has prompted
President Benezet to form a committee to be called Students Unable
to Instinctly Cope In Deciding the
End (S.U.I.C.I.D.E.). Benezet told
the University Senate that "maybe
we may have to relax our academic
standards so students don't feel
threatened by grades." VicePresident Sirotkin told the
assemblage that students were not at
par with other major Universities in
suicides and bringing in a more
demanding faculty would certainly
put us in contention with the big
ones.
ticularly high rate among virgins,
sexual perverts, and English majors.
Durkheim said, "These kids are
reaching out. They are trying
desperately to grab something real
and attractive. Their whole lifetime
they are bombarded by society's sexual gods and then they come to class
and all they see is acne, fat, and dandruff. Durkheim mentioned one
transfer student from Berkeley in
California who came to his lecture
and masterbated while a film on
"Nursing Homes and the Aged" was
being shown. "If that isn't the living
end, I don't know what is," he joked.
The meeting was interrupted
abruptly when a Speech Pathology
major jumped from the podium and
committed Hari Kari before the
Senate. One faculty member who
had been sitting in front of the
suicide victim noted, "When will
students learn that they can't always
get their way by feeble acts of intimidation.
Dr. Francis Durkheim Withburg
from Siena College tolc the faculty
and student senate that most
students were simply "not getting
enough ass." He mentioned the par-
The study which will now be
forwarded to the Chancellor of the
State University is expected to result
in the elimination of high rise erection on state campuses.
li.bw
This student is but one ot the 3770 at Albany State who yearn to III
themaelves. He couln't wait lor President Benevolent'a
announcement ol the formation ol S.U.I.C.I.D.E. He Jumped
oil Eastman Tower yeaterday.
B0PSA Rounds Up Council, Council Returns *180,000 loantoFSA
Administrative Personnel!
Pat Curren Boiled in Oil
to leave early for vacation and no
by Jackson Fang
crimes had been committed.'
In a bold and revolutionary move,
Srokc and Run was exceptionally
EOPSA roundc up some Central
angry with Currn for using the
Council members, SA Comptroller
stereotype of "singing and dancing
Jerry Albrccht, SA President Pat
niggers." Informed sources said
Curran, and many other University
Curran was boiled in oil, by an imadministrators, and burnt them at a
ported African witch doctor.
woodent stake near the Campus
These sources who claim to have
Centr.
witnessed these events do not want
EOPSA President Sir Frederick
to reveal their names because of
Srokc and Run said that this was in
possible, reprisals by EOPSA. Presiresponse to the slashing of their
dent Benezet who escaped "Sizzling
budget.
Tuesday," decided to resign three
In their next year's budget remonths early from the SUNYA
quests EOPSA demanded $285,00 of
Presidency. Some say he "highthe possible %300,0O0 in student lax
tailed it ou of here like a man
monies.
possessed by demons."
Many remaining SA officials were
Unfortunately it seems that the
disturbed at the rash of activism of
students who did the burning will esEOPSA. Vice President Ira Hirncape punishment because of lack of
baum, who miraculouly escaped the
evidence.
blood bath, now takes the hot scat,
Meanwhile Central Council
until elections can be scheduled to
members Anday Bauman and Ken
replace the defunct leaders.
Wax announced their endidacy for
University Police were caught in a SA P r e s i d e n t . Both have
dilemma, because they couldn't find
acknowledged that EOPSA's
the bodies of the leaders. Informed
demands were just and that if elected
sources said they were scalped before
they would grant any and all EOPbrowning. Yet Srokc an Run said
SA requests.
that the University leaders decided
,by Steve Tin Anchor
Central Council voted last
Wednesday night to return a $180,000 . loanmtQjtlthe Faculty-Student
Association. The loan had recently
been withdrawn in protest of the 8%
board hike. Council was coerced to
take this action by the "pressure tac•tics" of about 150 angry administrators that packed the Campus Center Assembly Hall.
The group of administrators, led
by FSA Director E. Nu'rdbert Zombie, were armed with yardsticks and
squirt guns and refused to allow any
of the Council members to leave the
room until a bill returning the loan
was passed.
"Just because we're administrators and they're students
they feel that they can give us the
royal fuck-over," shouted Zombie.
"That's what 1 call job discrimination. Those little bastards think
we're always trying to give them the
shaft. There may be less of us, but
we've got a job to do and we're
I'uckin' well gonna do ill"
Throughout the meeting several
Council members were constantly
the targets of streams of water and
flying yard sticks. "I am against any
board increase," stated SA President
Pats Current.
"1 second the motion," added
Council member Candee Mayhcr.
DALLAS, Texas (UPI) The Warren Commission Report issued a new
document today that President John F. Kennedy -was shot in Novembei ol
1963 with a gun. They said that undoubtedly the gtftl that killed the president
was loaded, the trigger was pulled and the gun fired releasing the bullet. I his
and the fact that Lee Harvey Oswald was in Dallas,seem to point to him as
the assassin. This is the boldest statement issued upto this time.
WASHINGTON, D.C. (AP) John Mitchell, John Erlichmann and UK
Haldeman today asked for their tapes back from the Senate Investigating
Committee. The reason seems that they will be using them for their new
upcoming T.V. series "All in the Felony."
deal with these big, tough radical
freaks. You want something, you
take it. They don't give it to you, you
rearrange their faces for 'em."
Council struck back at the administrators with several vicious
remarks. Ml am against any rent
hike," stated Current.
"I second the motion," added
Mayhcr.
Speaking in a serious tone Zombie
commented, "I'll never go to the
bank and beg for the money that
SEIJI OZAWA
MltOSMINIC
Y, B, CHAVAN ?
KICK-IN-THE-ASP
FSA needs. There's no reason for it.
I'm going to beat it out of SA."
Finally, at about 11:30, Council
succumbed to the mob pressuresand
passed a bill returning the loan to
FSA. But this wasn't the end of
things.
Zombie then requested a reduction in the interest rate that SA was
charging on the loan. The demand
called for chopping the recent rate of
8 'A% to '/»%• "I think that's fair,"
chuckled Zombie.
Council was appalled at this
further demand and refused to give
in to it. The administrators again
blocked all exits allowing no one to
pass until the request was honored.
After much talking and little
debate, Council still docs not know
what to do. The services of a local
helicopter pilot have been secured,
and an airlift established supplying
Council with ample food and water
until they reach a decision.
"This may." said Central Council
Chairperson Lewis Fiddlesticks,
"warrant taking over the Administration building . . . if they ever
let us out of here."
KKK Closes SA in CC
by Kay K. Ceigh
The Albany State Ku Klux KJan
Club closed the Student Association
Office in the Campus Center at
Albany university today, forcing
Central Council into its 45th
emergency session in the past two
week, as they staged a massive sit-in
to protest what the club president
Bubba Smith cites as "unreasonable,
unwarranted, and un-American cuts
in our 197-76 budget request." The
group had requested 37,500dollars.
"We submitted a complete
breakdown for every penny," said
Smith. And indeed they did:
$10,000 for 2 x 4 inch plywood
7,500 for white sheets (queen size)
3,000 fro tar and feathers
5,000 for napalm
2,000 for torches
4,980 for student assistants
20 for S.A.S.
Plus use of all income.
APRIL FOOL'S, 1975
APRIL FOOL'S, 1975
chicken-shits. Now we know how to
5,000 for bleach
HOLLYWOOD, California (UPI) Raquel Welch refused to pose today to
be the fifth face on the Mt. Rushmore monument because she cluimed that
she couldn't do the scenery justice and there weren't two mountains large
enough to accommodate sculptors.
NEW YORK, New York (AP) The Forty-second Street district was
declared a disaster area today by Mayor Abraham Beame as the entire
Mormon Tabernacle Choir was mugged, approached by drug addicts, and
propositioned by "Ladles of the Evening." When asked about the tragedy
Rev. Billy Graham was heard to say "of course, weareall just creations of the
human society and evil will always be our foe on the path of righteousness,
but we loved it!"
Vice-President for Management
and Planning, John Heartless, sat in
the corner of the room pulling on a
Marlboro Longhorn. "These kids,"
Heartless remarked, "don't realize
that we as administrators have
special needs and gripes that SA has
failed to satisfy. We need that bread
to keep FSA healthy. In the past
we've tried to be nice about these
things, talk like gentlemen, go
through the normal political
channels. But what did we get?
Nothing but loads of bullshit! Now
we've seen their colors, those
"The whole university community
is invited to every one of our events,"
said trcasrer Jackson Brown. "We
are one of the few groups who extend
this invitation to all campus people.
We even go out of our way to reach
the Black, Puerto Rican, and Jewish
students."
President Coonrun of Student
Association called for the emergency
meeting of Council when he bund
Central Council Chairperson Louigi
Fcedler being burned in the Giritral
Council Office, and found a special
KKK invitation to a bonfire in this
mailbox. (Feedlcr was not unjured,
and later thanked the KKK forhelping him burn off some. .of. those ev'™„
was
pounds, and changed his mind and
agreed to support their budget in the
process.
After a five hour session in the
Fireside Lounge, Amy Goonsssen
qjoposed a bill that would te-iasiate
most of the udgetary demand* made,
pending Central Council's dMriMa
regarding funds for napalm and
torches,'
PAGE 3K
aBBBfcfflBBSBHffiSS
Q
Midlforials/Vomit
;
;:-mhard
M. Nixon,
speaking at a surprise press conferenci
You. Ady.iatt* to Mud. Wotk at JUbmy
i^ril rooltihn.M, Ktok-ln-tlwAg « y ) .
A Treasury of Prizewinning State
laundered Lettuce
Aristotle ii dead. So is Onaisii. Frank Serpico is living in Switzerland, as is Bebe
Rebozo's money. Hunsberger is in Colorado, along with Hunter Thompson's malaria
and Gerald Ford's skis, Benezet going to teach? Nixon is taught a lesson—don't run
with your mouth full. Rockefeller is gone from Albany, Wilson, always the dutiful
follower, leaves with him. Lindsay is on vacaon—for four years.. .out to lunch? Spiro
Agnew cettainly i s . . . .eating laundered lettuce—is kicked out of the bar. Carey is
kicked from the Capitol—the Right to Lifers have him now—him and his thirteen kids.
Wilhelm is caught with the bread—Zahm can't unload his fast enough. Stokelin
takes the SA office (he can have it). Budget Committee cuts the request, Cur-ran cuts
them loose,they cut put. Council can't cut the mustard. Albrecht cutshis ties—cutting
remarks? "'•'•,
There once was an old man named Corning
pfttnMlt pMMftt
^ 2 i S u i p r o m i K d to ukecrin»offtteltr^Jdld.i|mtklillltf W W . House where
IcouMketp.ney.oBir
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lift
I
The Cdbft ShJtirit
by Anal Bibey and Iwanna Mann
They pushed the button.
She loosened the knot of his tie
while he pulled her pantyhose down
her long, lithe legs. Hefingeredthe
buttons on her blouse, and slowly
pushed each one through the corresponding slit. She dropped to her
knees and opened his zipper with her
teeth. The two watermelon breasts
swelled, and seemed to fill the room
as her diaphonous white shirt slid off
her creamy, while shoulders.
She pulled his tight slacks off his
rhythmically twitching hips, and the
scepter of his passion sprang at her
with the force of a boa constrictor.
He pulled loose the bow of her skirt,
and it slithered to the floor, exposing
her pink flaming thighs to his hungry
eyes. Hegroped towards her panties,
but she had already dropped them to
the floor. By this time her pubic
mound, a black triangle, was glistening with beads of her desire. Rapidly
the two became an entangled massof
flesh with flailing arms and legs,
thrashing on the floor, rolling and
tumbling, spinning and squirming.
Her arms clawed his back and her
Who woke up early one morning.
Three students could home,
No more would they roam,
So he issued his Housing code warning.
EXTRA!!!! Foxe drops her bombs—right in Wilbur's face. Wilbur's drying out,
seems they took a dive in the lake. Knievel almost joined them, only his lake was a
Snake River. Faisal's oily look is in. The Wet head ain'tdead. If thebombs won't kill us
then the spray cans will. Ban won't wear off as the ozone wears out. Brezhnev is laid up
as Mao lays a rabbit egg.. .Brandt is Brand X, so's Heath. Thatcher for Waoman of the
Year? No one asked Greer.
Curran counts the days as the new prez campaign starts.A Kreiger farmer after a
smooth talker? More people out t o pasture: Forer, Benezet, Zacek (out to lunch),
Kendall (out of his mind), Sirotkin (out of the race), Vonhcgut (out of this world),
Menegaux (out of circulation).
Under pressure, Lon Nol may lose his head. Ford says let them bite bullets. Stagflation no X-rated adult flick—hunger hurts kids too. Let'em eat cake. .Look what
happened to Antoinette.
The Circle Game
T h e disgusting manner in which three dogs were executed on the podium last week
deserves special note. How about A flat? And that's another thing. The beer is much to
flat in the Rathskeller. And sometimes it's green, for some ungodly reason. And what
about god anyway? Has he reallybeen forgotten? An elephant never forgets, you know,
and so maybe we really should vote Republican more often jiist so we remember whose
in office. Just think: A Democratic office where nobody remembers anything. It would
be innovative, since they would constatly have to come up with new ideas. Constant
Comment is something that happens when you drink tea, and it is quite absurd. Tea
and crumpets taste good with constant comment, though i'.gets boring sometimes, like
Central Council meetings, University Senate meetings, FSA Bored of Directors
meetings, and most other meetings. Why are meetings boring? Because.
But we are off on a tangent, which is not the point. Or the square drawn from that
point tangent to a circle. The Circle Game is an excellent lyric from a Joni Mitchell
song. Joni lives with David Geffen, who used to go out with Sony and Cher. Cheap TV?
You bet. Those S O N Y people can really do it. Which brings us to Jerry Rubin, who
isn't very interesting now that the sixties are over, so let's keep on going to Reuben
sandwhiches, which are excellent a t the Patroon R o o m Restaurant. At least that is
what Central Council Chairperson Lew Ficller says, and we can say with reason and
support that a department chairman in this University ordered one for lunch on
Monday.
What do you associate with Monday? Blues? Red is preferable in most cases. Surely
anything is better than concrete white, after a few years here. Then again, when else
would you get to live in such a weird place, that anyone who visits considers weird but
the residents don't appear to agree. Oh! Heres one appearing to agree at the Swan
Club.
Furthermore, it's very tiring to go on and on reading through something that never
seems to get anywhere. Here we are, though, at anywhere. We were actually here all the
time, but you wouldn't have believed us at first. Which brings us to the Wizard of Oz
which was too long ago to remember so we'll keep on going right on to Racing Car
Ozzie, which really has nothing to do at all with Harriet though 1 would indeed enjoy a
'S*:*:***:***^^
piece of Baby Ruth, an excellent candy. Babe Ruth wasa baseball player, but we doubt
that. It has something to do with the adrenalin, or at least sweating through a hundred
Wchavealldevoured"greenies"atgur,|ocal
exams before finding out wc don't really want to be a doctor after all. A horrible hot dog stand before out of desperations What
experience.
tastes very good goingdown is delightful when
Which is nothing new, if you've read this far.
compared to the abomination which laic finds
itself in your toilet bowl. Upon reflection, wc
discover bits of onion, relish, catsup, mustard
and little soggy pieces of bread, but where is
the hot dog? It is inside of you forever, my
friend. Consider what this means.
On the other hand, at one time or another
KRRAIA IN •KIM
—
DANIEL SHAMES
we have all had difficulty right up to the point
BUSINESS MISMANAGE*
MORE OK LESS ZUCKERMAN
ol excruciating pain in attempting to rid
MIKE SENILE
(iiiNZo union
ourselves of the maniacal phantom which wc
VERNON
Dzi'
Y
CHILKA,
BETTY
BOOI»
ASSISTANT OONZOS
believed to be located in our intestine. False
FLYIN' UPHILL
A SPECK (IF EDITOR
hopes and wishrul thinking. I the pope
PROSTITUTION MANACER
PK McHiNii
Catholic? Contemplative frenzy leads us to
TAKE-A-NICKEL EDITOR
COACH THEM SICK
black bananas, prune juice and as a last resort,
ASMICIATE NICKEL-TAKERS .
LOUSY MARKER, FEMALE. MCPHERSONATOR
Ex-Lax, Bettersoonerthan Inter our prudence
MAKE WEAKER
ERITREA PAGE EDITOR
puys off in the form of tiny, spherical objects
"COUSIN" BRUCE MAGGOT
SNORTS EDITOR
sometimes referred to as rabbit pellets. Time
NATION SLANTED
ASSISTANT SNORTED
FARTS EDITORS AND ASSISTANT EARTH
MOWER AllllESS,
eventually heals all wounds. But you don't
PAUL PELAGIC, HILLARY DILLAKY DOCK
really believe that nosense, do you?
heels rubbed his thighs. He was on
lop of her pushing, pumping like a
firehose quenching her fire while he
was lighting it. She flexed those
seldom used muscles, creating the
feeling of fingers squeezing and pulling his organ like a piece of salt water
taffy.
They were near orgasm. She felt
an avalanche starting inside her, just
above her pubic hairline, flowing
throughout the whole of her body,
ending at the root of her being, that
little fleshy sawed-off penis, her
clitoris. It throbbed with adullache
of pleasure.
He felt like ther was a volcano
building up inside him, churningand
boiling. He was about to erupt with
ihe force of Krakaton.
She came.
lie came.
They dressed.
He straightened his tie while she
made sure the scams of her slock ings
were straight.
The elevator stopped, opened, and
Ihey walked out into the lobby of
their old age home.
HMMMaKKPaSftSSKSSSSSSSJ*^^
Father Knows Best
Yourmothcr'slikcaWalt'sSub.Shc
smells like tuna fish and is oily.
Submitted by Big Dom
Is your mother pregnant? No?
Thank Cod.
Submitted by Robert
Notes From Kansas
A Treatise on Education
or
Docs your mother let you smoke in
Do you have any nude pictures ol
bed? She lets me!
your mother? No? Want to buy
Submitted by Phil Lutio
some?
Submitted by Laslman Kodak
Your mother is like a railroad irack,
she gels laid all over the country.
Subbmitted by Lionel Hampton
I heard your mother strapped a mattress to her back and is giving curb
service.
Submitted by The Revcrened Billy
Graham
Your mother is like a bus, everyone
gets on for 35<t.
Submitted by Rocky Roceoco
Is your mother still sland ing on 42nd
street with a mini-skirt on? No? You
mean she look il oil?
Submitted by Reader's Digest
Your mother is like a doorknob,
everyone gets a turn.
Submitted by H.R. Ilaldeman
the Diarrhea and Constipation of Society
ADVERTISING MANGIER
ASS, AD, MANCillR
Tor SECRET AUVIRIER
GOOEY EDITOR
PERVERTS EDITOR
SHIJTTERRIIGGERS
LINDA DESPERATE
HUIKIIE
,
JUAKNE UNDRESSING
WENDY SAINTS COME MAKCIIINU IN
FLEECY BANANA
ERICS LEAVE US AND UNKLUEIIN
WE CAN'T FIND OUR OFFICES AND
FORGET WHAT OUR PHONES ARE, bill
STILL FONDLED BY STUDENT ASSOCIATION
Blob
Student Celebrity Speaks His Piece
M»yAw*^mmt^mii**'
alternative. Console yourself with nonconformity. There is no such thing. Delusions
abound in all of us. We arc the sole
propagators.
This leaves us in a qtiandry. How can wc
best change our eating habits'.1 One was i"
start is to become fully aware of how much
damage you urc doing to your bods I"
absorbing much of what is termed as Inning
(in the inlcllcclualtslcircles)"hot-dogstatus"
It is only then llint you will realize what e."'"1
you can do for yourself. Refuse to digest the
verbal diarrhea which you hear in main
classrooms and on the street. II you must spii
it out, do so in a way which will destroj all nl
its identifiable characteristics.
I will close with a noral of the story. Long
ago in ancient time Ihcr lived the mystical loo
bird, Such were the powers of this bird that il it
dropped its loud on the heiid of anyone, and it
were wiped off, the person would die
immediately. People were so superstitious in
those duys that they just continued to wear the
Society and our educational system are
loo's crap on Ihe top of their heads, lest they
constantly providing us from IhcAgc one with
would die.*
the choice of cither of the horns of the
Today, Ihetoobird is no longer with us but
dilemma, Should we be die-hard diarrheaists
the practice still remains of "wearing it."
or clamped-up constipalionisls? For those of
whether il be inside or outside.
yon who obstinately refuse to be associated
My fellow Americans, beware. . .
with cither of these camps, there is no
"If the loo shits, don't wear it."
This is and on the spot interview Penis: Whal's the purpose of this inwilh a hard up penis, conducted by terview?
ASP reporters Duke Dildo and ASP: We want to know what the
anxiety fell by having ihe horns is
Hickory Nuls.
ASP: Is il ihe sagging economy like for the male member.
that is the cause of your recent un- Penis: Perpetually I'm rock-hard, inflexible. Al times I protrude above
employment?
Penis: No, it's because I speak loo the pants line, the zippcrcultinginlo
quickly which messes up my inter- myforportions, lget rubbed againsl
any article available, A tree, a desk, a
views. Oops, sec what I mean.
ASP: You didn't have to spil in my wall, the ground. But I'm ncvci
eye. Well, in any case, you have been brought 10 orgasm. I'm part of a
Hans dreams he is a delivery boy
Book Review: Joy of Celcbacy by
described by your colleagues as a religious person. I tell him, "Listen,
who is met at the door by fa
Hans Zolf and Ivgoll D. Horns.
real stiff. Ihey all seemto have a if you can'l have intercourse do
housewife in panties and a brla. As
Never have I read such trash. A
bone to pick with you because you're something else, Wrap your grimey
hcanxiously waits for his changeshe
touchy subject can be handled gently
constantly trying to get ahead and hands a round me and yank. Nocturbut ihe oauthors have pulled a real dons baggy, carpenters pants and a will break any barriers to get it. Are nal emmissions arcn'l enough lo
boner with this one. This book has heavy wool sweater and sensds him you willing to go out on a limb to gel satisfy me. I know. I'll threaten lo
kill myself.
been banned acverywher but the on his way.
what you want?
Ivgoti's fantasy finds her in the Penis: Limp. I'm stiff as a board. II I ASP: Wail. What are you doing?
Vuticaii and the Five Twons.
sweltering Amazon jungle the clap- don't Bel some action soom I'll burst Well, ilia l's all we'll gel for now from
Right form the slarl they fappeul
to our nore perverted senses. Huns live of loin-cloih clad headhunlers. like a sperm-filled balloon. At lenjl the subject of our interview. He's
They form a circle around her, closholding his breath till his eslicles
wakes up and immerses himself in a
relieve inc.
ing in. Suddenly they begin to chant
lurn blue. So, thisis Duke Dildoand
cold pitchei of walcrwhilelvgottsits
ASP: let's continue ihe interview. I
five fool Two Byes of Blue in ten
Hickory Nuls saying good night and
on a can of minute maid orange
didn'l prepare any questions so tell
part hannony. This is meant as an
keep on plugging.
juice. Over a bteakfast of donulsand
me Ihe first thing that comes oft the
' slausagcs Ihey dicuss Ifusl nighls offering since she has just been made top of your head.
there virgin queen.
dreams.
TmhhTopTttt
Your mo ther is like a revolvingdoor,
she has no knobs.
Submitted by Karl Marx
Your mother's like McDonalds, you
get change from a dollar.
Submitted by Ray Kroc
Prices are going up. but your
mother's still going down!
Submitted by Allen (ireenspar ,
Your mother's iike a bowling ball,
always getting fingered.
Submitted by Brunswick
I heard your mother's had only two
sexual experiences, the Green Bay
Packers, and the Chinese Army.
Submitted by Vince Lombard!
Your mother's like a Rheingold, she
gives a ten minute head
Submitted by Ed McMahon
Your mother's mouth is like a coffee
can, its chock full of nuts.
Submitted by Savarin
I think of your mother like fried
eggs, I like her in the morningjind
over easy.
was
Submitted by Henry Fonda
WINNER III
Your mother is like a stamp, she has
a sticky back.
Submitted by Igor Stravinsky
1
e/zur pervert/seizure/pervert/seiz
ervert/seizure
/ .
Contest Rules
This Weekend
The Final Row!
Submit pu77.le solutions tm the Chemistry Laboratory by the morninsj
proceeding the publication of the newspaper.
by Stephen Ladenheim »nd Art At this point, the Biology major
commented that it was about time
Timarkbj
that his opponent develop her
A hot controversy has been raging
Bishops saying: "They are not very
for n number of years at the State
well posted where they are." Visibly
University of New York at Albany:
pissed. Miss Accounting ventured
over scholastic compitition between
With 2.N-Q2 and the game continued
Biology Majors and Accounting
Majors, regarding who would come 2.P-K4; 3.P.1P, N-N5: 4.P-K.R3.
out on top.* The question was finally Suddenly. Mr. Boilogy found it
r e s o l v e d b y t h e l o g i c a l , necessary to excuse himself stating
intellectually-determining game of "You'll have to pardon me. Miss Accounting majorette, but I'll bo buck
chess.
as soon as humanly possible." ConThe game was conveniently
fused, she replied, "Did you make
played last week in the University
your movve yet'."' Impatiently, he
library. Colors were determined by
answered sharply. "Where the hell
who was carrying the most pencils.
do you think I'm going; to make my
The Biology major edged the Acmove."
counting major 20 to 18. However,
The final move came, unforthe judges ruled that 18 perfectly
tunately, as a blow to Miss Accounsharpened pencils were belter tahn
ting. It was 4.N-Kb!! and seeing (or
20 chewed, blunt ones and awarded
not seeing) 5.PxN,QpR5ch;6.P-N3,
white to the Accounting major.
QxP is mate, she resigned.
The game began:
Solutions will be chosen according to the content and who knows the
preview editor! Remember: Only 3 cohorts an issue chosen
Wednesday, May 3
The name of who you know on (W) ASP (no slur intended) will have td
appear in your solution.
New Frit, on Campus: 1 Pelta Thigh Fraternity will have initiations
on the lower extremities of Holly Wood. Everyone, try your best to
COME!
Each winner picked will recieve $3.21 for the pizza of your
desire'/IGoodics have to be ordered and picked up in the tower lobby
within 25 minutes of the lab report.
Burpathon: Walt's Subs is sponsoring a repeal performance which
will be held in your local tower lobby tonight featuring last year's
uncontested winners; Belching Bertha and Berny Barf.
•
Any friend of the ( W)A SP is encouraged to enter and most likely to win
J
Make up your own solution and enter it. The more the merrier!
• ••
f*........
Monday, July 14
Inter-Quad Bong Contest: is sponsored by the Ad Hoc Rolling Paper
Committee! and Baby Brother with the grass behind the Campus
Center today at High Noon!
Bring your own bowls!
Women's Liberation:
presents a seminar dealing with the
requirements needed toobtainanM.R.S.degreehereatS.U.N.Y.A.
While
Black
* The Biology Major came out on top
Accounting Majorette Biology Major of the Accounting Major in an inI, p.Q4
N-KB.l
teresting mating position.
,
f—
Tuesday, January 28
WSUA now...
Chapel House:' in conjunction with the Carillon presents The Beh
Ah Ringing, today every hour on the half hour. Call in for your
request tune!
j&
better than ever
Elks Club: presents at out own Mohawk Campus, the film: Bambi
goes all the way for a Buck. Tickets can be obtained with just a little
doe!
Mom Timetable
On Cramps
Albany State Enema
I've Got My N o s e Between
Your Cheeks
I Would If I Could, But It Gets
My Hands Gooey
Phallic East
Noah Films
Deliverance
C.T. Films
Easy To Be Hard
FIG
The Forbidden Fruit
Off Cramps
Made A Son
Circle Twine
The Spiral Staircase
The Tightrope
Hellman
The Real Mayo
KOKE RADIO
the SNORTY 640
DOWN
1. Guimun's original
2. Roddcnbcrry's solution for NBC- 7
torpedoes (pi.)
3. forceahle, violent sex act
Towering Inferno
Little Women
i
4. this puzzle doesn't make on 7 nfsnse
5. A type of arithmetic mean
7. our nation (abbr.) (also a gilt)
8. an orb (speeil'ic)
9. a movement of the head
IU. Custer's quad
11. short coat
12. The "empty" dmrm
13. prefix: equal
14. prefix: meaning negation
If), who had a shot at this tourney
17. the weather
19. "You're in trouble" slung: Pennsylvania Dutch
20. Touchdown
25. Glue
2d. He wasted u Chariton
29. Woman's I si name
34. a, 7 , the
35. Our punctual "noiscmukcr"
3d. A sea mammal
38. What Hill Cosby is
39. inactive
40. What our "airport" people do (part
abbr.)
43.
7 in one!
44A. Indian maidens
44H, The "llourcsecnl" one
44C. Prefix: Combining form of Ilium45. Sheets
45A. I'lancl of the 7 (sing.)
46. Counterintelligence (abbr.)
47. Bacteria (pi.)
47A. small, graceful deer
47B. 7 -man
49. one of I-rcmliiia triumvirate
Pag* 6K
KICK-IN-THE-ASP
50. banquet
56A. Neither
57A. harmful insecticide
58A. What this campus isn't
59. thoroughfare
60. Singer 7 Louisiana, a parcel ofland
64. Humorous and witty person
68. The Trilogy (abbr.)
69. The "razors" of bread (pi.)
71. Trick o r . . .
73. 7 like a dove
75. Tolkien's beasts (sing.)
77. Suffix: noun ending
78. Film speed
79. base of neck
80. Federal I'yc
82. Curran'sgang
83A. A large rodent
87. Which came first?
88. 5-3-3. (relating to position ol letter in
alphabet)
34. our friend "flicker" (uhhr.l
35.
37.
41.
42.
slandcrize
mess hall
This paper's a kick 7
If you raid this,obviously you are a
43. present tense of "have"
44. prefix: again
44C.
7 de France
46. William Colby's crew
47. Transparent "merry-go-round"
48. fabricate
50. SUNY's wilderness
51. Ages (sing.)
52. slung: yes
53. the perpetrator ol'SUNYA
54. out
55. PAC's glndiiitor stage
58. Drought us Kuddcnticrry
60. draw
62. Heyerdnlli's paper bout.
89. Don't slttbb it!
63. Do the 7 justify the .
91. Newspaper (specific) abbr.
65. 007 enemy
92. Drunkard
66.
7 well
94. decay
67. He ltusn't been here yet
98. fmcy conjunction
70. Condo's corner
ACROSS
72. Consumer's Guide to Touchers
74, In addition (uhbr.)
2. Small puncture
76. A dog (pi.)
ft. The "metal" quad
81. A gift - see 73 down
12. A money class
82. And another - sec 82
18. High altitude Observatory (abbr.) 83. Railroad crossing sign
(What a gift!)
84. A "stunning" beast
19. Cabinet branch (abbr.)
85. ASP (rearranged)
21. In the near future
86. "Oriental" flicker
22. Sponsored Hope in II.N.
90. Cayuga could use this furry friend:
23. 7 -out
Egyptians
24. to make a choice
93. A
7 inent on campus students
25. a lake on a map, it's more like a '! would like to have
27. Inlo'l Order of the 7 P
9ft. Electro- 7
28. t h e Williamsburg, Va. Quad
97. A "linger"
30, jasmine
99. Charge for instruction
31. consumed
100. Junior Naders
33. sire (poetic)
101. Tennis mutch
Can you find all 36 slums on campus?
E V E R W Y C K L N K O
T A SI R R0 M AN E B
A D FE N G A R O R A C S U T
N C TT A B D V- A
M 0 NL S I R G 0 2 E N G E I
A D EF O P N E D
T D 0T K N A Q R N Y S H 0 E
S Y 1H K PA L I
J o e l (He's got sc ?l) Felt,
I E TC E R E P 0 O C A I P A
E B NG G NI V R
Bill
Rook,
D i n •»*»»»»,
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H L LY L N 0 P Q H I A J K L
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L N KE A B N Y E J V A L S S
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G E AO N K
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Broadway Harris
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R E HA R R D C N L E O C V E
* * * * * * * *
K E DR R EM I K
The B i g J .
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N C EY B A I F Y C S N K E R
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S T MO N T A U K S O p'W(g N A
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N D TT E N B R 0 E C K O E V
plus a h o s t of others!
VAN COR TLA
HOE S S N O T S G N I V I l
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PAN NAM A N B
l Wlf*3
0 N GF N A C I H A K
NODE
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J A DE G F E D I N A P P A T
fun dead by your student association i
L F UL T 0N H 0
pouoncuua—o«o«ooo«aonntin«
The Station with the permanent buzz
located on the 4th floor off the
Campus Center
I
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JWfefl
gives you the
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APRIL SOL'S, 197S
KICK-IN-THE-ASP
PAGE 7K
Castles Exffhgufshed
Reflexive
litters
To the Editor:
1 know this is strange, but I've always
wanted to do this, I mean, its been a long-term
desire that lyts been very important to me.
Please understand.
The Editor.
uwwwwwuwuuuuuujuuiuuuuiiiiifinii>nnwiwwM>i
?"
i«
by Ken Wacktoff
t
]
Tired of Apathehy
r.
Rough ish
to the Mlto':
Resenting all the abuse that apthetic
rtudents receive on this campus, we ahve
formed the Albany Apathy Slub.
The purpose of the club is to stand up for the
apathetic student's rights here at S U N Y A. It is
all too often that we are the brunt for ruthless
attacks in the press, and we are repeatedly
blamed for the condition of the atmosphere of
the school. We're tired of this treatment!
When you think about it, it's kind ol
incredible. Here at Albany, where wc always
heat how the majority of students are
apathetic, there is not one cent ol' student tax
monies spent on apathetic programming. We
plan to change all that.
Students for apathy will may have a meeting
in IX— 7 next Tuesday at 7:30. Then again, wc
mav not. 1 don't really care.
Disis Dum
The ancient Greeks
strove for nothing
more than for beauty,
in their personal
lives, in their thought
and in their art. To
prove the point, the
Classical Forum
presents today four
representative examples of Greek art.
To the Editor:
I was strolling through the park one day, in
the very merry month of May, 1 was taken by
surprise, by a pair of rougish eyes, as I was
strolling through the park one day!!!
Disis Maakbeeleev
7
.
t
1
T,
!"
Neat and Cute
t
To the Editor:
I love your brown hair, and you're so neat.
Yoiirun that paper so cutely, it's just a joy. I
love you
.
]
_
«
"
;«
, .
'•'"•
s
*
_
?
w e recognize o.r responsibility to present both side, of an Issue, and tn*lte
comment from responsible spokesmen with opposing views.
Editors Notc!
FAMOUS ECONOMISTS SCHOOL
JW0T^R.STnDl
on Wamms im
ramus
« I USED TO HAVE
i
TROUBLE BALAUCING
My OWN CHECKBOOK, BUT
rroPAV, APTERTAWN&
MY CORRESPONDENCE
COURSE- FROM THE. _
FAMOUS ecpMOMOTS
SCHOOL, 1 AMCHIEP
ECONOMIC ADVISER
TO PRESIpENT PORD
SUSV PIGHTIrJ©
PUMAWAV INFLATION
ANPSPICAUN©
UIMEMPUDVMEMTJMT
u/HAT'S MORE, I ' M
HAVING WUVOMSr
WHAT-IUKE-SEST7"
GHRD€M9
WASHINGTON, D.C
Remember as children the building
blocks you loved? Do you remember the
Leggo sets? The even hopscotch boxes?
Do you remember the pleasure derived
from square game boards? Or when
Mommy neated the room?
Symmetry. At Concrete Gardens you
can return to the symmetry ofyour youth.
Here are apartments you can share with
people your own age, in an environment
of beautiful sameness. Serene simplicity
of living space means a delightful sense of
organized beauty. Out your window you
can see angular sunlight and even
shadows.
It's like living in a Geometry textbook.
1, 2, 3 bedroom apartments available
including every major inconvenience.
Double & triple occupancy required.
SfiNDTODjy FOR.
FREE TALEirrTKT
Stop It!
To the Editor:
1 want to complain about all the
complaining that's going on. Why is everyone
complaining? It's so stupid to complain, and
very annoying. People are complaining about
their courses, about the food, about their girl
and boy kriends, about their parents and
about stupid etters to the editor. I his
complaining must stop! It's ridiculous to voice
your complaints. It just makes other people
mad, and gets you nowhere. Just stop n.
everyone, cut it out.
Disis 1). Worisl
• Electricity and heat Included
In rent
• 24-hour security patrol
As Per Normal
• Ceramic tile showers
• Economical
facilities
laundry
• Bus line at door
• Communal dining area
• Landscaped patio and play
ground
THE WHITMAN
2 bedroom
$70
• E d u c a t i o n a l facilities
available within walking distance (at a slight extra
charge)
(w/State Quad card) $50
To the Editor:
I am writing this letter to correct some
errors you had in your paper. Once again, the
ASP has shown sloppy, careless journalism
packaged under the guise of a newspaper. I his
bastardization of fact that appeared on page I
has got to he one of the worst.
Even before starting the article, the reader
should have been forewarned. The headline
read "Room Rents Raised." What sort ol
heading is that for a story on lelethon m
The article itself was full ol gross
inaccuracies and information not even related
to Telethon. Mr. Hart's remarks on the
dormitory crowding were interestm enough.
but I don't think they were on the topic,
Disis Reedickulass
PAGE K-9
KICK-IN-THE-ASP
Paging 8K
KICK-IN-THE-ASP
APRIL FOOL'S, 1975
7 1 U f a * - 4 3 8 1 8 1 J f S 0 l 0 2 9 3 2 2 9 ! 51 i
S U N T * tonight, l a r g o erawd b o x -
K » 4 0 | e o » » 0 6 910827
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Tho H o D e p a r t m e n t announces
291 M H j M
a
now courto— " t o x 1 0 1 . " Labtwill
b o o p e n 2 4 hours a d a y .
813-910
t l 1315 s 7b
i K 7 4 D o 4 5 9<P j . b 2 5 * 6
T7503O1
T h o Q u i e t D e r m it having a party
i 1 j
f e a t u r i n g " N o B a n d " . Bring earplugs
yi52W5»753|V47hlV43MStnE87
a n d uncrunchy refreshments.
x 2 7 W k ; 75V49)BM5
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t
So it) SB132
t6?)0ut5(i
t i l
Students interested
•kan^AffUts" IISES£3£L
V4946
in earning in-
into*
V<0B13hU6 9 ) o
d e p e n d e n t study credit doing work
Final meeting of tho A c c o u n t i n g
fothcominf
Li-
q u i d a t i o n t o b o discussed.
SUNYA'S
•IBQ(Pub.ic
Interest
• ^ • • ^ • ' *"ea*^W *^W'^F»"^*^e** •^T*"*
Research G r o u p ) will b e sponsoring a
M a l i c e on "The Pubic
****************
T h e O r t h o d n t l c S o c i e t y will hold a
seminar
next
week
avoidances
on
tho
<s*)o
936
tll245s)52t
i915 2 7 9 3 r l 43i
2 2 2
Skinnyroom. Therewill b e 2
Dr. Tel E. Scope, f a m e d mouthwash
Dr.
will s h i f t t o t h e r i g h t .
will
speak on the top of
Banker-Barkfield
on
"Sper-
M o h a w k tower a t 7 p . m . on " T h e
m a t i c S p e r m a x a a " If you're cold
f u t u r e o f thoj f u t u r e . " Sponsored
see Dr. Brrr.
ATTENTION
WWW
&*
I * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
e m p o l y o d S e n i o r s to discuss the
B. T o k l a s B r o w n in the Office of
Student Strife if they sant some truth.
!'. ( % A f y 6 ' / 4 l u , / 4 7 4 1 2 a
S 1 5 s 4 5 2 9 1 03SS877 iti =/8lu2
111245s
issue - " H o n e y , w o ' r e f i r l n ' , n o t
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Termite and B u n "
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T u m Around a n d Share
T h e r e wil b e a meeting of all those
time
who
Club.Tuesdays a t 8.
expect to t r a n s f e r
out
of
with
the
ta) t @ $ ) o
111245
put
IIH
1
%2 ) 0 1 5 2 6
1 3
1587SIJ0
45
?ln3B t l S » a > O I S 7 W < a 9 1
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MBaf
and eairt
MM
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your
Computer
WS
51tfi' illhY
HUNK NO mofOi
:**************#
d a d d y is going to cancel your Master
Interested in b r i d g e in Brooklyn?
C h a r g e c a r d . W e will also stop sen-
Students to sit in on the SA office on
ding
your
fifty
Thursday, February 3 1 . Bring a box
allowance.
We'll
lunch. C o f f e e will b e provided. You
quadrophonic stereo a n d your car.
must supply o w n amusement
So write soon or you'll have to come
and
I ' » I I I "*—
091NVM
SM3QI«i/3aiM
POILSAIE
u
ll°D
! ojei^i u e e q i,uaADq
bidder. Call a n d ask for M r . Beneiet.
Albany
Excellent condition, like new, Nicon
D e a t h In O n e of H i t Apartments.
FTN Kit. Used only once in a hunting
Ralph B/ers, landlord of f a m e a n d
exhibition in Tasmania. Both a d v a n c e
glory was found frozen to d e a t h after
a n d shutter a r e jammed a n d may
h e a p p a r e n t l y told one of his tenants
need
ttmthis rented a p a r t m e n t was w a r m .
O.K. .Whoever ripped off my ounce
It seems flyers d o l e d o f f a n d . . .
from the concert last w e e k e n d better
minor
repairs.
Kit
includes
recycled lens p a p e r a n d a roll of
slightly f o g g e d 2 0 oxp. tri-X. $495.
firm. Call Stave,
For sale, one slightly used planet
(known as Earth), price negotiable.
position can b e filled. Call Pearl after
midnite.
6923.
cheap.
Will t r a d e with N e w York Times. Call
I m e n d zippers a n y w h e r e , anytime.
third a n d fourth floors of the C a m p u s
Ounces, poinds & grams. N a m e it
and claim it. And if you're looking for
a trip, h a v e w e g o t a hit for You. So
a n d friendly, loves to e a t a n d when
you're u n h a p p y can m a k e you feel so
and we'll give you a n offer y o u can't
g o o d . C a l l Albany ASPCA. Give a
Bernice
You a r e the sexiest prof I have ever
w e could love one another, feel foi
h a d . It's a pleasure attending your
e a c h other. From now o n . . . feels so
g o o d I can hardly stand it.
John
house,
llvingroom is e x t r a , W a t e r a n d elec-
One
tall, b l o n d e
and
fussy. C a l l Bob,
tricity separate. N o heating facilities.
$ 2 9 5 . bi-monthly. Coll R a l p h .
Two w o m e n n e e d e d for o n opart-
APRIL FOOL'S, 1973
Delaney & Bonnie
' a m . You loot ' e m , w s shoot ' a m . N o
§
Proof*
!
H a p p y Birthday Roomie
No perverts.
You unconscious twit. W h e n the
did
you ever
remember
Bob, C a r o l , Ted, Alice
my
To our b e l o v e d d a u g h t e r Sylvia,
P l e a s * write or call ut toon. W e
since you left for school three years
a g o . If w e don't hear from you soon,
serial number c a n catch us a slumber.
KICK-IN-THE-ASP
orotic
x
jand m wrlty to many
"Your Toasier
Phy&te A.U
Loves You"
Oh somewhere in the NHL the Stanley Cup now rests
In the hands of a team that's recognized as the best;
1
Question of the W e e k :
with
¥ottr-Atws"
laiuiuiiiiiiiuiiiiiiiiiiiHiiiwiiiiiioiiiiiiiiiiiiiiieaiiiiiiiiHiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiHiHwiiiiiHiiiiiwiiiiiiii
retire to the RatskWer
N y m p h o m a n i a c of the month goes to
Randy •
N e e d a good lay?
Call 457-5B0B a n d ask for Supei
Stud J.D.
I Anyone interested in the Albany Student
Oral sex with a telephone
Stud of the month goes to Didi.
before he pulled the trigger,
Bitch of the week goes to JoAnne.
(P.S. The bitch is back).
\J -Jf/fifa.4»<K~ TUiaA
compensation for looneys,
JAP of the month a w a r d goes to; Lew
Fidler with Ken W a x as runner u p .
|/^S5BPlnterest M e e t «
OtherSKitreasof.n«erestwi..bed.scussed. We will Jhen
Does Steve G r e y really "do it" to
d e a d mice?
!
And somewhere fans smiling,
But in New York they cry,
| Cause Stemmer, mighty Stemmer shot—and fired . . . the puck . . . wide.
Tistic
" % Psychic Communications
Box 6 9 6 9 .
have w a i t e d so long to hear from you
Hot cameras. You rip ' e m , w e strip
$mlj/H'nHttnl
D e a r Bern, Bernie, D e l , & Bonnie,
Irresistable
p l a y m a t e . M a l e or f e m a l e . I'm not
Lounge ot the VvVC. Guest speakers will include
Cyberneticist Harry P. Nis
some new "tools," Send photos to PO
Sex • coming to a conclusion.
half-wit...
bedroom
S
B W M F Q L looking for same to try
DEFINITION O F THE WEEK:
twerp, if you h a d a b r a i n , you'd b e a
rent—3
tyt,
After all this time of being alone,
D e a r Professor Edwards,
Across the red, across the blue, our Stemmer skated in
The Ranger fans went wild—"In overtime, we'll win."
Then Stemmer faked lo his right—the goalie went right down,
The Ranger fans all screamed and yelled, "Yahoo, we've won the crown.
And then the air was shattered by the force of Stemmcr's shot,
The Ranger bettors all stood up, to collect on the spot.
next Freudey night at seven dirty in the BedsMe
HYSThrrwty
• «0 14, f$ **$
The Phychology Club is holding its first mating
D e a r Bernie & Bernice,
Birthday? I have feelings too. You
For
true, if you love me sweet. Our lives
BfRSONALS
hell
d o g a friend t o d a y .
s
With just ten seconds left to play, and the face to Eddie's right.
Out on the ice came Stcmmcr's line, to try to tie that night:
And Stemmcr won lhat face-off, and dropped it back lo Park,
Who led led mighty Stemmcr on a breakaway,—a lark.
•ruee-tirvj
My love,
'em, w e scrape ' e m . Call evenings.
drop In a n d t e e us or give us a call
refute. M A F 4 9 2 3 . Atk for Vito.
else could ever d o . If you love me
Love,
Looking for a playmate? It's warm
ft §tt Hun, Mb fk$
^CH*«-ooy
will always b e complete. M y love.
Harry's Abortion Service. You Rape
ASP.
Hey Bernie,
I w a n t to marry you, too. N o one
Center.
ass—Imean class.
Call Joe Stud.
s
Love,
Bernie
Lost, O n e mind somewhere b e t w e e n
At your service 2 4 hours a d a y . Any
canons dining had.
turn you o n .
•»iiJi*mai
return it, p l e a s e . Call Ken.
Willing to t r a d e f o r Venus. Call G O D -
One Editor-in-Chief—going
O h , Bern ice. Oh,Bernice. M y love will
JERViaJs
<
oat In our
Dear Bernicemiddle of a shave I call your n a m e .
a n d b e d . Call Sally a f t e r midnight.
There was style in Stcmmcr's manner and the game
began to change.
He quickly set up Fairbairn. and then Irvine found the range;
And then when Gilbert scored a goal.
And Dale Rolfe did the same,
Amazingly, the Rangers, had come right back in he game.
Love Ernie Presto
-ujg U D uo eui u;ol oi potuDM sjepjg
for similar male to share a p a r t m e n t
resort and(or prison. Price—highest
The Ballad Of
Pete Stemkowski
>»&!9&>»HWBMSSWfS3
«yMWW»»>>»viv..,
iHion and yoo get to
Nothin' d o i n g .
In the middle of a shave; in the
F o u n d F r o w n To
I
Y9f OMf pMMMtMl
H d 'Xaujnof 3;uoXjq
a3
u
ifaeoforyoal
D e a r Oscar M e y e r -
ElZl-ZOO^mouJUIIDD
' d ; j | o fjff'ZS
»d»
your
flats.
M a y easily b e converted to a Hotel
tandloid
take a w a y
»**•
The double " O " of the year a w a r d
I -jaijdnf o i p e p o e u X|aicuedsep a pig
O n e b e d r o o m . C a l l Bob or Ted.
Young polite college w o m a n looking
week
goes to H a p p y Rockefeller. Congrats,
">Z
'SJOOX O00E
One University—convenient location.
a
home, b r a t .
weapons.
ment, on the busline. Rent is cheap.
dollar
trade them. What would we do if
we had to trade Gardner irvoroVo MacPhail: There is absolutely no THAT GUY'S NAME AGAIN!
they ever developed into the top
Every time we make a deal, the
balance the sheet. Otherwise, we truth tothisrumor.Howcver.wedid
notch ballplayes we expect them to?
only
thing
you
guys
remember
is
have
to
send
Felipe
down
there
for
would he plus 8 wins, and there
Conference
For G-D's sake, we might actually
Remember 1973. the "Year of the would be no race this year, and if threedaystotalktohim. Asyoumay when we get the short end of the win the pennant or somehing, and
bargain.
We
trade
to
please
the
fans,
have
guessed,
when
his
brother
told
Yankees"? You know, Matty Alou, there was no race what would we do
then what would we do?
him all about the benefits of being a and all we get is flak. Wc traded
for our ailing attendance?
0 r a i g Nettle and a host of others
Besides, we're heling the city clean
Clete
Boyer
for
Bill
Robinson
to
who helped trick the Las Vegas Houk: Wc have as good a club as Yankee and playing in the Bronx, he
up thearcaaround Yankee Stadium,
please
the
Blacks,
got
Alou
and
immediately agreed to come.
oddsmakers into making the anyone else.
and what better way than to trade 2
Besides, you know those people COMPLAINTS!
Yankees the favorites in the East. Let Reporter: Isn't Malty Alou a hit old
xlacks and a Puerto Rican. Now, I'm
Complaints
when
Robinson
hits
stick
together,
and
what
better
place
me take you back to those Yankees, for your young outlook?
not being prcudiced, why some of
.185-1 can't help it if those people
for
one
of
them
than
in
the
Bronx.
my favorite players are Black, like
the team of clowns and excuses that MacPhail: Let me explain this
are naturally inferior. People like to
Houk:
I
have
a
great
relationship
Aaron and Mays. I mean it this way:
bit the proverbial boot and finished completely. Matty docs nol really fit
forget about the good deals, like
with
my
players.
in on the new Yankees he is a good
Torres was very popular with the
in fourth place.
Cater
for
Lyle,
etc.
Sure,
we
make
local natives, and nwo thathe'sgone,
hitter, knows how to run the bases, Reporter: What about the deal for
mistkes, but YOU'RE only human.
maybe they'll go to!
knows how to bum. doesn't strike Charlie Spikes and Rusty Torres?
out much. etc. -however, his one Haven't you been billing them as
Meanwhile, back to the questions. Torres to please their people, got
Reporter #1: Sirs, by your recent saving trait is his .300 fielding
future superstar? What if Nettles
Well,-we've developed them to their BlomBERG to please our box seat
dealings for Matty Alou and Graig percentage.
turns out lo be another Curt Blefary?
fullest potential, and now it is time to holders, and even got Lyle to please
Nettles, it would appear that you
You say that Matty is too old, but.
share the wealth. Now that wc have the firemen. AND WHAT DO WE
MacPhail:
STOP RIGHT T H E R E !
have scrapped youryouth movement.
IN
RETURNlook at his brother, Felipe. Felipe is
established their potential, wc had to G E T
DON'T Y O U EVER
MENTION
Would you care to comment?
37, and as Phil Rizzuto always
MacPhail: Well, let me make one
reminds our fans, has a 17 year old
thing perfectly clear: lam thcgcncral
body. Since all those people are the
manager, and the management of
same, Matty at .14, must have a 13
the Yankees has always got the inyear old body. As you know, at 13
terest of Yankee fans at heart.
the body is just beginning to mature.
Yes, we have scrapped the plan.
by the Blue Boot
Houk: We have decided to trade the Since most players play until they by T h e B i g B o o t
arc 40, we expect another 27 years of
It looked extremely dismal for the Ranger fans that day
future for now.
A
.M
.1
.A
.
President
Dirty
M.
playing rom him.
The score was 8-4 with but one period left to play;
Reporter #2: Aren't you concerned
Cohn
was
found
dead
in
the
A
.
M
.
I
How can you question a deal in
And then when Park got caught up ice,
about your starting pitchers, es- which wc gained 27 years and a .300 .A . Office today. His body was And someone checked Ratelle,
pecially with the loss of Ron Garhitter for Gardner, a player who riddled with over 100 darts, ap- The blue seat fans all mutttercd that the season'd
dner? Didn't he keep you in the race
gone to hell.
merely balanced the sheet. Besides, parently hurled by unknown
last year with his 8-3 second half.'
Gardner was a reject from the minor assassins.
MacPhail: Yes, he made a small conCohn, famous for deliberately
league club in Queens.
tribution. However, he made no
Houk: It is time lor us lo go out and making incorrect calls while of- Out on the ice was Egers botching up the Rangers play.
greater contribution than, say, lor
get it. The fans have wailed long ficiating intramural sports, was And linemate Steven Vickcrs wished he'd stayed in bed that day;
instance: Fred Beene, Ron
found with a note pinned to his nose They tried their hand at forechecking, but everyone could sec,
enough.
Klimkowski, or Wade Blasingamc.
Reporter: Mr. Macl'hai, what about which read: "We lost our game 103- They sorely missed the Polih Prince, the load named Stem-kow-ski.
You see, we look at it this way: he
14 because of your officiating."
the 5 year plan'.1
won enough games to balance out
"It was probably better for all of us But Stcmmcr'd left his purse at home, and could not break his streak,
their losses, l'hus, they all kept us in MacPhail: Thai's S1K to you boy. that Coon was eliminated," said A
He had not thrown a single check, for this, the fifth straight week;
Let met explain something about 5
the race. You see, if Beene, Klim, or
M .1 .A . Vice President Ellen Go- So while the fans all moaned and groaned, and Coach Francis
Wade had won any games, we qear qvans. First of all. everyone away. Go-away, who will replace the
fumed and frowned,
probably would have won the pen- knows that 5 year plans are a Com- late President Coon, later spoke to
nant, and then there wouldn't have munist invention and. as such, arc the A.M.I.A. Council, recommen- Stemmcr sat and ale Kilhassi, while his teammates all let down.
designed lo undermine the great
been any pennant race. That would
ding that "Security be called in to The mezzanine fans began their chants-—
American pastime. As loyal
have defeated our five-turned seven
make a door lo door search for the Nine-tenths of them irate...
Yankees, and Americans, we cannot
year plan, because instead of being a
murderers so that the assassins can
contender, we would be a winner, tolerate this. Besides, and qecondly, be awarded the learn trophies and T- "We want the rolling Load they screamed.
all live year plans are doomed io
The man who cannot skate!"
and would have lied to our fans, and
Shirls ihey merit."
then what would we do? So you sec, failure. We know.
"I also plan lo recommend that Then early in the third period there rose a mighty cheer
Reporter: It has been rumored that
every Yankee made a contribution.
Council consider printing up special It started in the blue scats, and soon reached the lower tier;
Matty Alou did not want to play for
Now that we have sent Klim,
letters of commendation for the ac- It brought smiles to the Ranger fans and got Egers off the ice,
the
Yankees.
Is
this
truV
Wade, and Beene down to Syracuse,
cused, thanking them for their ef- Cause Stemmer, yes, the Rolling Load, had stepped out on the ice.
forts on my behalf."
byNuioc*
Houk and MacPhail at a Press
Coon Dead
JOCKS,
b y t h e Astrology Club.
Students should contact D e a n A l i c e
lecture
Quad
expert
There will b e a C o a l i t i o n o f Urs-
Rarisitqlogy
2 9 1 a - 3 5 01 4 0 1
ejfP"
You"
to t h e
Those
W h e n the bell tolls 12, all the quads
****************
floa
"Burn
Students a r e invited to hear a talk by
****************
tonight. Topic, \fli],ib», V T a k e
dance
n7a?n7510 29M8 51u2
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * | k
"Brace
Tooth
a
will
:********«******
and
Yourself—Buck
sponsor
Watchers
• • • • • • • • • • • • •
Improve your g r a d e s ! Hear members
on "Sabotaging fellow students,"
Weight
Should b e
Public." Not o p e n to the public.
of the B i o a n d C h a m faculty speak
291
kegs of Tab a n d melba toast.
talk b y M e n a c e Deposit a n d Artful
***»)nfc**4ijfc»}ufca)riMr.»jr.
SUNYA
NB7«3»53278o
Calories" Friday night in the Indian
• J * e*(»"f»i e^ej W
7e
-35-BS10
i l l
1491
ACDC 129.
tl»5s
9 3 6 o115
0 ) 1 2 7 291 n 5 1 ) 17513 ln401 Mm
with a n important profession should
contact the O f f i c e o f I I I R e p u t e
C l u b it tonight,
Hoot And MacPhool At A Press Conference
5*3629 14 4 1 5 - 1 - 7 )8>t IP T B 9 7 0 6 7e
p e t t e d t o c o m e early!
Butch looking for same into S & M etc.
C a n d y m a y b e d a n d y a n d liquor
1
but the marblewas only tw<
might b e quicker but nothing beats
Jit Jv jhl />**&>>> 7W/T.
I Press, please inform the staff. We'd be
i
interested to know if we are holding your
[
interest.
IIIIISUtMIIHHIiOHIHIIIIS>IltSIIIMSSSIttllllllllilllllSniSltStlSSIHIHItMt>SSIIIHI>llltUISSIIIIHStltt(ltl»HSIHIItUIWMlU
Nose C a i n e .
PAGE OK!
KICK-IN-THE-ASP
APRIL FOOL'S, 1975
;
er, U K
^ . . ^ - _
— . iT • » . . .
.".
. i
.,..._..,-...--,•.;—
. , . . : . - - ' ; • - ; - : • - "
— • ' • - - - »
STUDENT J i PRESS
MOM THAN n m c i
TMCaOUUTION
Of ANY O H M
• A M * ON CAMPUS
SUN% CUNY All-Stars Here Monday—pg. 18
ALBANY STATE'S KICK-IN-THB-ASP
,•-
.•-••
•. •
_ £ * .
.
_
Albania, N.Y. 12222, April Fool's Day, 197S
HOOPSTERS BALLED
Danes Lose To Mutts In ASPCA Regionals
Tunnel Rats Exterminated
nolo
lahnran
Hoop Star Porsche Audi Smartly Trips Up Opponent (Above Left) And Then Tries To Find The Hole (Above Right)
Mutts Run Over Danes:
Picture At Right Shows "Pooch"McTaw
Trailing Dane Runner Early In Mile Romp.
Lower Right Shows"Houndog" Hathaway
After Recording Record Jump Of 100 Inches.
"* v0fKtf* ^•ffm'm^m
BULLETIN:
A. M. I. A. President
Dirty M. Coon Was
Found Dead In The
A.M. I. A. Office
Today.
Pictured At Right
Is Dennis Belchkin,
The The Number One
Suspect
Details On Page
Nine.
RATI UMvmsrrr o r NIW TOM AT ALMMT
VOL. UUI NO. le
ATML 11,197a
Fields Chosen For SUNYA Presidency
by David VVaiielbert
The University Council has
recommended the appointment of
Dr. Emmett B. Fields as SUNYA's
new president. Council's recommendation goes now to the SUN Y Board
of Trustees. The Trustees are expected to approve him.
The Presidential Search Committee, formed over seven months
ago, carefully screened over300 candidates for the presidential position.
Acting in an advisory capacity to the
University Council, the committee
came up with their recommendation
over the Blister vaction and submitted it to Council "forappropriatc
review and decision". According to
Sorrcll Chessin, Vice-President for
University Affairs and Executive
Secretary to the search, "This (the
Field's recommendation) was a unanimous action by both the committee and the Council."
Chessin said that Dr. Fields has
had seventeen years of university administration experience. Before his
present post as Executive VicePresident and Dean of Faculties at
the University of Houston, Fields
served as Arts and Sciences Dean at
Vandcrbilt
University in
Tennessee, where his MA and Ph.D.
degrees were awarded.
Dr. Fields gave this comment
from Houston about the Council's
recommendation:
"It is with great personal satisfaction that I accept the recommendation of the University Council to be
President of SUNYA. The University's achievements and opportunities for distinguished additional
service impressed me very much and
I will join colleagues and friends
there with a sense of deep devotion
to the important work ahead. My
family and I look forward to living in
and becoming citizens of the Capital
District."
During his visit to SUNYA, Fields
was subjected to what student search
c o m m i t t e e m e m b e r Howie
Grossman termed "unnatural
pressure", when local television
crews blurred vision with bright
flood lights. However, Grossman
added that "he handled the situation
well" and commented, "1 was impressed...there's a definite presence
to the man".
Grossman suid that the criteria for
therecommendationwas to "look at
SUNYA's needs in the next five
years; leadership, scholarship and
institutional and academic direction". One of three students on the
twelve member Presidential Search
Committee, Grossman said. "We
were afraid that none of the candidates would accept because of the
recent budget cuts".
Student participation in the
presidential search was hailed by
members of the search committee.
Chessin said, "Student participation
was outstanding. Students did a
detailed job examining the candidates at the open meetings."
Grossman said that the search committee received many letters "good
and bad" and gave his thanks, "A lot
of students attended the open
meetings and I'd like to thank them
for that."
The Presidential Search Committee formed in August of last year,
was made up of three students, three
faculty members, three University
Council Members, an alumnus, a
library representative and a
representative of the non-teaching
professionals. The University Council's nine members arc appointed by
the Governor and include bankers,
lawyers, doctors and a member of
the University staff.
If the 'Inivcrsity Council's
recommend tion is approved by the
SUNYBoa d ofTrustees, Dr. Fields
will assw.ic the presidential chair
following President Benezet's stepdown on June 30.
Dr. Emmett B. Fields, Executive Vice-President and Dean ol Facultlea at the University ot Houston, will
probably be SUNYA'a next President. Director of Media Relations Bern Rotman Is In the backround.
Undergrad Ed Neglected For
Grad Work, Study Reveals
professors charge administrators chology, as an example, the three
Undergraduate education is less with, "an inexuscable. neglect of un- authors detailed their methods of
important and given less funding by dergraduate education," coupled analysis, and explained how they
school administrators than graduate 'with an overemphasis on graduate arrived at their conclusions.
through 1973 there were apeducation and research, according to research. Blaming the imbalance on
a study of live departments at a "greatness syndrome" common at proximately live limes as many unS.U.N.Y. at Albany, done for major universities; (greatness is at- dergraduates as graduates in
Chimin' magazine by three former tained by a University hiring well SUNYA's I'scll program. Seven lull
professors: Curt Smith (English). known professors who will either professors were in the department
Harold Miller and l.eroy Pelton tench graduate courses or do high receiving 43 percent of the faculty
level research): the study maintains sulnrv budgel. I wo of the full
(Psychology).
In an article entitled "The this policy is having a negative im- professors taught no undergraduate
courses, while the remaining live
Economies of leaching", the three pact on undergraduate education.
Departments chosen ill S.U.N.Y. luiight one apiece. I bus they acat Albany I'm study were Psy- counted lor imlj 12.5 percent of
chology, English. Economics, Math, iitider-gruduiile teaching courses.
and the School ol Criminal Justice. On theoiher hand. Hie department's
As the title of their article indicates, 1.1 instructors and part-time
the thrust ol Smith's. I'elton's, and teaching assistants, many of whom
Miller's study was money. Mow were graduate students, taught over
much money did grueliinlccducation 5(1 percent ol undergraduate courses,
receive in any one department, coin- yet received onlyuboul 15 percent of
pared wiih undergraduate studies'.' the salary budget.
I hen data, uikcn Irom the 1972Following through their analysis,
1973 school year, was based on a the trend ol higher paid professors
complicated formula involving teaching less undergraduate courses
teacher's salaries, undergraduate vs. held line. Psychology, of all the
graduate leaching load, class hours, department's in the ( olloge of Arts
and overall student enrollment in and Sciences studied, demonslrated
that department.
this trend to the fullest extent. UlWhat they found confirmed then timatelv undergrade pa) for this imhypothesis. SUNYA spent as much balance, declare Smith. I'elton. and
as live limes the moncv, lor graduate Miller, either in overcrowded or
education ns u did for un- closed classes, or by having
dergraduate education, (based on overworked, insuliiceiilly trained intheir own economic category, "stu- structors leach their classes.
In addition, the article indicated
ilenl dollars value per credit."), in
two departments studied, ranging that tenure decisions in all
down to as little as two and a half departments were directly related to
times as much locgrndiiale studies in the inequalities in graduate vs. unother departments. Criminal Justice dergraduate education. According
klrchmayar
klrchmoy.r
was found to have the worst to "The Economics of Teaching",
graduate: undergraduate ratio, while professors who leach less underLeft; A quiet scene Irom a grad assistant's otllce hi the Psychology building. Right; Undergrad
Economics had tltc most equitable graduate courses are more likely to
psych students pick-up their tests. According to the study, grad work Is more highly valued than
receive tenure than those who leach
bit la nee,
undergrad students st SUNYA.
mntinuttl on pageflve
Using one department, Psyby Richard Norwind