C o u n s e l i n g , C a r e e r, & D i s a b i l i t y S e r v i c e s N e w s l e t t e r
Spring 2014
Raider Wise Counsel
The Truth About Anger
In this Issue
The Truth About
Anger
1 -3
Did You Know ?
1
Deciding on a Major
2
Accommodation
Reminder
3
National Sexual
Assault Statistics
3 -4
Personal Counseling 4
Available to Enrolled
Students
Contact Information
5
Did You
Know?
Summer registration
is now open.
Please register now
for best selection of
classes
Though so many of us fear it and judge it negatively, both in
ourselves and in others, anger is a normal human emotion. It
does, in fact, serve a purpose, as do all emotions. Our
experience of anger tells us that something is wrong and needs
our attention. It is a natural response to a perceived threat. It is there to protect
us. Anger also helps motivate and provide the energy for change, both on individual
and larger socio-cultural levels.
The truth is, that few things are inherently and absolutely good or bad. What matters
more and determines an object’s or experience’s value is what we do with it. Our
experiences of anger exist on a continuum from mild irritation to rage, and there is a
difference between feeling angry and acting angry. We will talk here in terms of
healthy versus unhealthy ways of handling anger. There are three basic categories to
choose from when deciding how we will respond when feeling angry: suppression;
expression and calm.
Suppressing Anger
Suppressing (holding in, ignoring or denying) our anger is never healthy. Suppressing
anger turns the energy of the anger inward and can lead on a more physical level to
hypertension (high blood pressure) and depression. It can also result in (either
conscious or unconscious) unhealthy indirect expressions of negative feeling. People
who more typically use this mode of relating to anger can tend towards being critical,
cynical and/or passive-aggressive. These people are often not pleasant to be around,
and this can significantly impact their relationships in a negative way.
Expressing Anger
To express is to communicate, in some form or fashion. There are both healthy and
unhealthy ways to express anger.
Unhealthy Anger Expression
Unhealthy anger expression comes in several shapes and sizes. When we engage in
manipulation, resistance, withholding or avoidance as a way of communicating anger,
we are expressing anger in an indirect and “passive-aggressive” manner. Sarcasm is
also an indirect way of expressing anger veiled by humor. Criticism and cynicism can
also be used as indirect ways of expressing anger. Anger can also be expressed in
direct ways that are unhealthy – as physical or verbal (by words chosen and/or tone
and volume employed) aggression.
Page 2
The Truth About Anger (continued)
Because anger expression is a learned behavior, it is still very possible to acquire that
learning even as an adult. Anger is a surface emotion; there are always other emotions
underlying our anger. Very often that emotion is fear or hurt.
Healthy Anger Expression
Healthy expression of anger means using assertive communication. It involves using
I- statements (e.g., “I felt hurt when you didn’t call me back when I expected you to”).
When we are passive, we are essentially saying that “you are more important than
me.” When we are aggressive, we are saying that “I am more important than you.”
When we are assertive, we are saying that “we are both important and deserve
respect.
Calming
Deciding on a
Major
Counselors are available
to help students explore
careers and decide on a
major.
For an appointment,
call:
Roane County
(865) 882-4546
Oak Ridge
(865) 481-2003
Other locations by
appointment
The third approach to dealing with anger within us is to start by seeking to calm the
mental and physical energy that accompanies anger, allowing us the opportunity to
make a more conscious and intentional choice in responding to the situation. By doing
this, we increase the likelihood that we will be able to express our anger in a more
healthy, assertive way. It provides us with an increased sense of internal control
which then offers us the ability to take the time to further assess the situation. We can
then be intentional in how we choose to communicate the issue to others.
The strategies employed in calming this angry energy are often referred to as anger
management, and include techniques for addressing both the way we are responding
inside our heads (our thinking) and the level of arousal in our bodies.
Cognitive Anger Management
This means exploring and changing how we think. So much of our anger can be
brought on by assumptions and interpretations that we make about others’ actions and,
particularly, the intentions and motivations of others’ actions. Being willing to
acknowledge these assumptions and then being willing to challenge them within your
head (asking yourself if there are other possible reasonable explanations for the other
person’s behavior) or even clarify your interpretation with the other person, is an
incredible tool in managing our anger reactions.
Exploring and learning to identify the feelings that underlie our anger (and then
learning how and being willing to express those) is another. You can also assess your
current stressors: are you tired, hungry or under significant stress in your life? Any of
these factors can make us more susceptible and sensitive to irritability and quicktemperedness. At times we carry leftover hurts and angers around with us, unable to
let them go, and these “triggers” amplify our anger reactions to present situation.
Letting go of resentment isn’t about letting others off the hook, it’s about giving
ourselves relief from our own pain, on our own terms, and refusing to continue to
create more unnecessary pain.
Page 3
The Truth About Anger (continued)
Physical Anger Management
These techniques are primarily designed to reduce the physiological arousal – the rush
and build-up of physical energy – in our bodies. There are many practices that can be
used to either soothe or release this energy. Taking a simple deep breath and
hesitating before we speak allows us to slow down our process and gives us the chance
to be more choiceful in our response. Slow, deep diaphragmatic (belly) breathing
through our nostrils can help lower our heart rate and soothe our nervous system.
Slowly repeating a calming word or phrase (e.g., “relax”, “stay calm”), while
breathing can increase the calming benefit. Using imagery and visualization of
peaceful scenes also reduces our agitation level. Any form of physical exercise or
exertion can potentially help us blow off some steam and put us in a space where we
are more able to approach issues that concern us in a less reactive, more reasoned
way.
Again, keep in mind that “managing your anger” really means managing your level of
felt disturbance so you can then better assess what your anger is trying to tell you –
what needs to be addressed – and then to do so in a healthy, direct manner that is
respectful to all persons involved. For more information or assistance with anger
management, please schedule an appointment with a counselor at Roane County (865)
882-4546 or Oak Ridge (865) 481-2003. Counseling is available at other locations by
appointment.
Source: Dr. Melissa Kulick, PhD, RYT
National Sexual Assault Statistics
Accommodation
Reminder
Students needing
accommodations should
schedule an
appointment with
his/her counselor each
semester before classes
begin.
Beyond the shame, stigma, and fear associated with reporting a sexual assault,
victims’ hesitancy to come forward often stems from lack of awareness about the
resources and protection available to them on college campuses. Roane State is
committed to a safe campus environment. For information on sexual assault reporting
options, please see the Roane State Police Department website at
www.roanestate.edu/police, or contact the Roane State Police Department at (865) 882
-4500. The Sexual Assault Center of East TN has a 24-hour crisis line, and that phone
number is (865) 522-7273. In addition to the 24-hour crisis line, the Sexual Assault
Center of East TN offers sexual assault nurse examinations, advocacy, and therapy.
Please see their website for more information at http://mcnabbcenter.org/sacet. Please
contact Counseling, Career, and Disability Services at Roane County (865) 882-4546
or Oak Ridge (865) 481-2003 for assistance and information about resources. For
emergencies, always immediately dial 911.
The Facts

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In a nationally representative survey of adults, 37.4 percent of female rape survivors were attacked between ages 18 and 24.
In a study of undergraduate women, 19 percent had experienced attempted or
completed sexual assault since entering college.
95 percent of attacks are unreported, making sexual assault the “silent epidemic.”
Sexual assault remains the most drastically underreported crime.
13 percent of women are stalked during the academic year, and each stalking episode lasts an average of 60 days.
90 percent of women know the person who sexually assaulted or raped them.
Page 4
National Sexual Assault Statistics (continued)
Debunking Myths
Both college women and men harbor misconceptions about sexual assault. Getting the
facts is essential to combatting sexual assault.



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71 percent of rapes are planned in advance.
80 percent of women who are raped try to physically resist.
43 percent of college-aged men conceded to using coercive behavior to have sex
(including ignoring a woman’s protest and using physical aggression) but did not
admit that it was rape.
There are many male college students who are survivors of sexual violence, too.
The Physical and Emotional Impact on Victims



Personal
Counseling is
Available to
Enrolled
Students


Academics and Achievement

For an appointment,
call:

Roane County
(865) 882-4546

Oak Ridge
(865) 481-2003


Other locations by
appointment
40 percent of rape survivors develop sexually transmitted diseases as a result of
sexual assault.
80 percent of rape victims suffer chronic physical or psychological problems over
time.
Rape survivors are 13 times more likely to attempt suicide than are people who
have not been victims of a crime.
Rape survivors are six times more likely to attempt suicide than are victims of other crimes.
25-50 percent of sexual assault victims seek mental health treatment as a result of
the assault.
In addition to physical and emotional damage, college students who have been
victims of sexual assault suffer from a host of problems that impede their academic achievement.
In nearly every case, victims cannot perform at the same academic levels that they
did prior to the attack.
Sexual assault sometimes causes student to be unable to carry a normal class load,
and they miss classes more frequently. This is often a result of social withdrawal
or a way to avoid seeing the perpetrator.
Student victims regularly withdraw from courses altogether.
In more traumatic incidents, victims leave the school until they recover, sometimes transferring to another college.
Please contact Counseling, Career, and Disability Services for information and
assistance.
Source: http://www.aauw.org/what-we-do/legal-resources/know-your-rights-on-campus/campus-sexual-assault/
#about
Page 5
Raider Wise Counsel
Roane State Community College
Counseling, Career, and Disability Services
Contact Information
Roane County
Tracey Watson, Director
watsontl@roanestate.edu
865-882-4546
Carol Jarabek, Support Staff
jarabeklc@roanestate.edu
865-882-4546
Oak Ridge
Jeff Snell, Counselor
snellja@roanestate.edu
865-481-2003
Counseling, Career, &
Disability Services
Staff:
Tracey Watson
Director
Julianne Cole, Counselor
davisjy@roanestate.edu
865-481-2003
Tina Messamore, Support Staff
messamore@roanestate.edu
865-481-2003
Jeff Snell
Counselor
Julianne Cole
Counselor
Tina Messamore
Support Staff
Carol Jarabek
Support Staff
From bottom left: Carol Jarabek, Tracey Watson, Julianne Cole
From top left: Tina Messamore & Jeff Snell
Roane State Community College is a TBR and AA/EEO employer and does not discriminate
on the basis of race, color, national origin, sex, disability or age in its programs and activities.
The following person has been designated to handle inquiries regarding the non-discrimination
policies: Director of Human Resources/Affirmative Action, 276 Patton Lane, Harriman, TN
37748, (865) 882-4679, humanresources@roanestate.edu. RSCC publication #14-083.