REVISING A DISSERTATION
FRIDAY PEER REVISIONS SESSIONS
Dr. Idoia Elola, 2013
Revision is a reiterative process
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Revision
Revision
Revision
Excellent drafted
dissertation
Phases of revision
3
Online revision
• Revise while
composing a
sentence or
paragraph
Middle revision
• After writing
a few pages
or
paragraphs,
do global
and local
revisions
Final revision
• Revise and
edit:
vocabulary
substitution
(thesaurus
techniques),
reading
aloud….
Create your own revision method
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Problematic areas:
 Poorly integrated quotes:
…..These findings are supported by her own
previous study (Lee, 2011b) showing that “the
process of explaining, questioning, and seeking
solutions to problematic features involves
cognitive engagement and promotes noticing” (Lee,
2012,
p. 71). [end of paragraph]
Paraphrased version
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Like in a previous study (Lee, 2011b), she found
that the process of seeking solutions to
difficult features results in cognitive activation,
which promotes noticing (Lee, 2012).
Create your own revision method
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

Background paraphrased from other sources (e.g., in
the literature review)
Read this section:
While the Sears Tower is arguably the greatest achievement
in skyscraper engineering so far, it's unlikely that architects
and engineers have abandoned the quest for the world's
tallest building. The question is: Just how high can a building
go? Structural engineer William LeMessurier has designed a
skyscraper nearly one-half mile high, twice as tall as the Sears
Tower. And architect Robert Sobel claims that existing
technology could produce a 500-story building. From Ron
Bachman, "Reaching for the Sky." Dial (May 1990): 15.
HOW DO I PARAPHRASE?
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How can I paraphrase?
Reread the
original passage
until you
understand its
full meaning.
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Set the original
aside, and write
your paraphrase
on a note card.
Jot down a few
words below
your paraphrase
to remind you
later how you
envision using
this material.
Check your
rendition with
the original to
make sure that
your version
accurately
expresses all the
essential
information in a
new form.
Use quotation
marks to identify
any unique term
or phraseology
you have
borrowed
exactly from the
source.
Record the
source (including
the page) on
your note card
so that you can
credit it easily if
you decide to
incorporate the
material into
your paper.
Potential paraphrasing
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How much higher skyscrapers of the future will
rise than the present world marvel, the Sears
Tower, is unknown. However, the design of one
twice as tall is already on the boards, and an
architect, Robert Sobel, thinks we currently have
sufficient know-how to build a skyscraper with
over 500 stories (Bachman 15).
Taken from https://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/owlprint/619/
Create your own revision method (cont.)
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
Lengthy stretches of analysis:
 Integrate
narration so the reader can follow the line of
your argument.

Poorly organized:
 How
to tackle this problem:
 compare
your manuscript with your previous outline.*
 if you did not have an outline, create an outline of what you
have written so far (reversed outline)
 Reread and make comments about what you wrote.
How to crate a reverse outline?
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
Step 1


Step 2


In the left-hand margin, write down the topic of each paragraph. Try to
use as few words as possible (it works as quick references). When
revising your own work, these notes should tell you if each paragraph is
focused and clear.
In the right-hand margin, write down how the paragraph topic advances
the overall argument of the text. When revising your own work, these
notes should tell you if each paragraph fits in the overall organization
of your paper. You may also notice that paragraphs should be shifted
after completing this step.
You should be able to summarize the topic and the manner of
support quickly (from 5 to 10 words); if you can't, revise the
paragraph until you can.
Making comments
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Create your own revision method (cont.)
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Once your chapters are complete, read each chapter
again for:
 random
sentences in paragraphs
 lack of references *
 thesis and sub-thesis
 supporting evidence
 transitions within and between paragraphs
 head titles
 limited vocabulary (too much repetition)**
Needing a reference
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Thesaurus techniques
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
What are common words or expressions:
to provide
but
….
Other revision considerations
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Create mind-mapping: writing things down on
paper, not on the computer.
 Read aloud
 Move forward, don’t stall
 Work on reviewers’ feedback: address the
comments one by one until finishing the revision
Lastly,
 Hire an academic editor for refined revision (when
necessary)

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THANK YOU