-
Final Script
I - ·1
se - In ProJucfion
UJ
-
Muncie productions of Love Me, Love Me Not. -Enjoy ©!
-
Love Me, Love Me Not
A new musical comedy based on
Shakespeare's Love's Labour's Lost
Book by
Leanne Boarman, Nick Brenner, Deloss Brown, Chris Bryant, Robb Coles,
Brad Coolidge, Raphael Crystal, Liz Davito, Natalie Ellis, Brian Geary
Kel1ie C. Harrison, Carey Kayser, Lisa Liaromatis, Meggan J. Ratterman,
Tiiu Rebane, Katie Shawger, A. Michael Tilford and Jason Whicker
Music by
Raphael Crystal
Lyrics by
Deloss Brown
additional lyrics by
Raphael Crystal and Wm. Shakespeare
Book © 2001 by Leanne Boarman,
Nick Brenner, Deloss Brown, Chris Bryant, Robb Coles,
Brad Coolidge, Raphael Crystal, Liz Davito, Natalie Ellis, Brian Geary
Kellie C. Hamson, Carey Kayser, Lisa Liaromatis, Meggan J. Ratterman,
Tiiu Rebane, Katie Shawger, A. Michael Tilford and Jason Whicker
Music and Lyrics © 2001 by Raphael Crystal and Deloss Brown
Prol.1
Love Me, Love Me Not
"Prol~lIe"
Berowne
W~~ill~1 J~~ ~~n~~i
,
Henry
WOULDN'T IT BE NICER,
Berowne/Henry
IF WE COULD SPEND OUR LIVES
IN A GARDEN OR A FOREST,
Longaville
FREE OF ALL DISTRACTIONS,
Dumaine
FREE FROM ALL ATIRACTIONS,
Longaville/Dumaine
FREE TO KEEP OUR MINDS
ON THE THINGS THAT REALLY MATTER!
Rosaline
-
WOULDN'T LIFE BE SWEETER,
Regina
WOULDN'T LIFE BE SANER,
Rosaline/Regina
WE'D NEVER HAVE TO BOTHER
WITH THE BATILE OF THE SEXES,
Katherine
FREE OF ALL ACCRETIONS,
Maria
FREE FROM OUR SECRETIONS,
KatherinelMaria
FREETOGROWOUR HAIR
WHILE THE GROSSER FOLK GROW FATTER.
Costard
IF THERE'D NEVER BEEN A SNAKE,
Jaquenetta
Love Me, Love Me Not
T~~~~'~ e~
Pro!. 2
~a!~a ie~~!~
Nt> UNHAPPY LOVERS
WISHING UNDERNEATH THE COVERS
Armado
THAT EVE HAD KNOWN TO LET
TH~ QQ9 9AMN~Q THINg ~bQN~:
Dull
(spoken) Leave it alone!
All
LEAVE IT ALONE!
Regina
NO MORE GUYS WHO SNIVEL
Henry
NO MORE DOPEY SONNETS
Berowne
EVERY WORD A MASTERPIECE
Rosaline
AND EVERY WORD A LIE,
Maria
NEVER ON HIS KNEES TO ME,
Katherine
NEVER BEGGING, "PLEASE," TO ME,
Dumaine/Longaville
"DARLING, IF YOU LEAVE
I WILL SHRIVEL UP AND DIE!
4 Guys
"SO MARRY ME, OH!
+ 4 Girls
"MARRY ME, OH!
+ Mote/Nathalie/Holofernes/Costard
"MARRY ME! MARRY ME!
+ Armado/JaquenettalDull (i.e. ALL)
"MARRY ME! MARRY ME!
1.1 .1
Love Me, Love Me Not
,-
ACT ONE
Scene One
(Outside the summer cottage. Henry, Dumaine and Longaville enter with bags.)
Henry
Guys, this is it. The Navarre summer house, ours for the summer while my parents
vacation in Europe. It's the perfect place to take some time to get away from
everything and learn more about ourselves. We are the future of the world and there is
greatness within us. We just have to find it! And to make sure that none of us stray
from our pact, I have taken the liberty of drawing up a written agreement for us and the
town to abide by. (he holds up a scroll)
Longaville
Is that really necessary?
Henry
Would you rather use blood? Sign it, Longaville, it's for your own good.
Longaville
All right, give me the pen. I guess I can manage, it's only for the summer. The mind
shall banquet though the body pine. (he signs his name)
Henry
Very good. Dumaine, you're next.
Dumaine
To love, to wealth, to pomp, I pine and die. I will sign the contract as well. Give me the
pen, Henry. (he Signs)
Henry
Fellas, I promise you, we won't regret this.
ITheOath"
HENRY
NOT GONNA BE A BAD BOY.
BEING BAD'S NO GOOD.
DUMAINE
NOT GONNA DRINK OR SMOKE OR SWEAR
LONGAVILLE
OR THINK ABOUT GIRLS IN THEIR UNDERWEAR
HENRY
I'M GONNA WRITE MY SONGS THAT SHOW I CARE
AND LIVE OUT IN THE WOOD.
1.1.2
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
ALL 3
NOT GONNA FOLLOW BLINDLY
WHERE OTHER PEOPLE LEAD.
DUMAINE
NOT GONNA TAKE THE ROAD TO HELL.
LONGAVILLE
OR THINK ABOUT GIRLS IN THEIR UNDERWEAR.
HENRY
GONNA WRITE MY SONGS AND WRITE 'EM WELL,
AND THAT'LL BE MY CREED.
ALL 3
WE HERE DECLINE TO JOIN THE SWINE
WHO SEEK FOR BOGUS PEARLS,
IT'S NOT MY GOAL TO SELL MY SOUL
DUMAINE
FOR BARS
HENRY
AND DRUGSLONGAVILLE
AND GIRLS!
I'M GONNA SWEAR OFF WOMEN.
DUMAINE
I'M GONNA SWEAR OFF BARS.
HENRY
I'M GONNA SWEAR OFF BEING COOL,
I LEFT ALL THAT WHEN I LEFT SCHOOL.
ALL 3
I'M GONNA FOLLOW NOTHING BUT THE GOLDEN RULE
AND LIVE BENEATH THE STARS.
(during the song Berowne has snuck in to witness their declarations)
Berowne
Guys, have you gone crazy? Yes, I swore to live and study with you for the summer,
but I don't recall any of these other observances. No women! Six and a half hours of
sleep a night and none during the day? No drugs or alcohol, we can't even eat what
we want? I hope that this is some kind of a joke.
Henry
Not a joke in the slightest. Now sign, Berowne.
1.1.3
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
Berowne
I think I will pass. I guess I had envisioned a more exciting summer than you boys
could handle.
Dumaine
When you said you would spend the summer here, you swore to everything. We came
here to get away from the temptations of the world and you knew that.
Berowne
Can I ask what the point of all this is?
Henry
The point is to find greatness in ourselves.
Berowne
I think we all know how great I am ... Listen, I've gotten this far in life knowing little of my
"greatness" and I think I can manage from here.
Henry
Well if that is your choice I will have to ask you to leave now.
Berowne
What? You guys are kicking me out? (he is met by silence) I don't believe this! One
minute a guy has some great buddies and the next minute they turn on him! (pause)
Look. I said I would stay the summer and that is what I intend to do. Let me read the
contract again.
Henry
Read it carefully, Berowne.
Berowne
(sings) ITEM NUMBER ONE: THAT NO WOMAN SHALL COME WITHIN A MILE OF
MY COURT.
(speaks) Who wrote this?
Dumaine
That would be me.
Berowne
Let's see the penalty.
(sings) ON PAIN OF LOSING HER TONGUE.
(speaks) Who devised this penalty?
Longaville
That was my idea.
-
Berowne
And why?
1.1.4
Love Me, Love Me Not
.-
Longaville
Shock value!
Henry
Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Berowne
These are not desperate times! O.K. To make you guys happy I will sign this contract.
But why don't we make it a little more interesting. I will wager that the three of you
cannot possibly follow these so-called rules. The first to break will pay dearly. I
promise you that it won't be me.
"Oath Reprise"
ALL
WE TAKE THIS OATH
TO PLIGHT OUR TROTH
TO ALL THINGS GOOD AND WISE.
HENRY
AND WE'LL EMBRACE
GOD'S GREATEST GRACE
-.
BEROWNE
WITH HEARTS!DUMAINE
AND HANDS!LONGAVILLE
AND THIGHS!
BEROWNE
NOT GONNA WASTE OUR TALENT.
LONGAVILLE
NOT GONNA TELL A LIE.
HENRY
WE'RE GONNA WORK TO MAKE OUR NAME.
DUMAINE
AND MAKE OUR REP TURN INTO FAME,
HENRY
AND WHEN IT TURNS INTO ETERNAL FAME
ALL
THEN WE WILL NEVER DIE,
NO, WE WILL NEVER DIE!
1.2.1
Love Me, Love Me Not
.-
ACT ONE
Scene two
(Immediately thereafter. Dull and Costard enter.)
Dull
I am here to speak with a Henry Navarre.
Berowne
May I ask what this is about?
Dull
I'm the sheriff of this town, and I need to talk to him about a 401 and 90210 on this
property.
Henry
I am Henry Navarre.
Dull
Sir, there has been a touch of mischief here. This letter will explain the whole thing.
(gives the letter to Henry)
Costard
-
The letter is about me .
.
Henry
It's a letter from the "magnificent" Don Armado.
Dumaine
Who?
Henry
He's a very pompous man who comes here every summer with his traveling medieval
fair.
Berowne
Well, then this should be very interesting.
Longaville
Lord, help us.
Berowne
Do I or don't I want to hear this?
Longaville
Just listen, this is liable to give us a hearty laugh.
-
(laughter)
1.2.2
Love Me, Love Me Not
-.
Dull
(raising his voice to be heard above the laughing) This letter is about me and
Jaquenetta. We were caught on this property.
Berowne
Caught? In what way?
Longaville
Did you see her underwear?
Henry
(to the guys, a bit annoyed) Will you hear this letter with attention?
Berowne
Yes sir! With attention sir!
Henry
(Reading the letter. Music under.)
"To whom it may concern:
My name is Don Adriano de Armado. I have learned about your agreement. I
understand it to be a very serious oath. Therefore, I find it necessary to bring this to
your attention. I discovered a little twerp of a delivery boy by the name of Costard
wreaking havoc with a fair maiden by the name of Jaquenetta on your sacred property.
I suggest that you take care of any business that is necessary and get back to me as
soon as possible.
Sincerely,
Don Adriano de Armado
P.S. I could not help but notice the reward that is being offered."
(to Costard) What do you have to say to this? Surely you have seen the notice posted
around town prohibiting any contact with a woman on this property.
Costard
It's true, I was with her on your property, but I was not with a woman sir, I was with a
lady.
(the guys think this is hilarious)
Dumaine
What kind of lady was she?
Henry
Let the record show that he was not with a woman, he was with a lady.
Costard
She is a lady and a friend.
Berowne
Oh, so he was no longer with just a lady, he was now with a friend.
1.2.3
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
Dumaine
Is she a "good" friend?
Costard
She is my best friend since childhood.
Longaville
Oh, so I guess they've been at it a long time.
Henry
(to Dull) What's the maximum sentence for trespassing?
Dull
Well, I can book him on a 227 or an 8765309 or even a 10-10-220.
Henry
Throw the book at him. Prison for a week with nothing but bread and water. In order
for Armado to collect his reward, he must first identify the trespassers. Please see to it
that they are delivered to Armado for immediate identification.
Berowne
I have a feeling these oaths and laws are gonna come back to haunt us.
(4 guys exit into the cottage)
Costard
I will take this ridiculous punishment, but only because we have to keep the rotten
summer people happy. Why are these things always happening to me? Jaquenetta is
a true friend. (sings)
"Sit Thee Down, Sorrow"
SIT THEE DOWN, SORROW
HAVE A CHAIR, JUST CHILL
SEEMS YOU ALWAYS COME TO VISIT ME
ANY TIME YOU HAVE AN HOUR TO KILL
MAYBE TOMORROW
FATE WILL SMILE ON THIS CLOWN
BUT UNTIL THAT DAY
SORROW, SIT THEE DOWN
(Dull leads Costard off.)
.-
1.3.1
Love Me, Love Me Not
--
ACT ONE
Scene three
(The carnival grounds. Armado and Mote rehearse their swordplay as they talk.)
Armado
What does it mean when a spirited man, such as myself, grows melancholy?
Mote
A sign that he will look sad.
Armado
Mote, I have a confession to make. I am melancholy because I am in love! (Mote rolls
her eyes, she's heard this before) Remember that country girl we saw on the Navarre
property? (giddy) Jaquenetta! Oh, in love again! How did this happen to me?
Mote
(under her breath)
You mean how does this a/ways happen to you?
-.
Armado
(without hearing Mote's chiding)
Oh, a man like me should be above this! Comfort me, Mote. What other great men
have been in love?
Mote
Picasso. He was in love!
Armado
Yes! (as an afterthought) But he cut off his ear for love of her! I wouldn't go that far.
Name more.
Mote
Rhett and Scarlett. They were in love!
Armado
Frankly, we know how that turned out.
Mote
Fred and Ginger! Mickey and Minnie! Romeo and Juliet!
Armado
No, no, no. None of them were ever so much in love as I. Mote, help me! We have
nothing in common! She is a pure and untouched country girl, and I am so
sophisticated. And yet, we are both so unwise in the ways of love. What should I say
to her?
-
1.3.2
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
Mote
(under her breath)
You're acting like this is the firsttime this has happened ...
Armado
(without noticing)
Sing to me so that I may picture her face. My spirit grows heavy. in love
"I Met A Special Girl"
(As the song progresses, Armado begins to realize that Mote is mocking him.)
Mote
I SAW HER THERE
AND FELL AT ONCE
THOUGH I'M A PRINCE
AND SHE'S A DUNCE
CAN CUPID
MATCH ME WITH A CLOD?
THAT FOOLISH GOD
THAT FOOLISH GOD.
-
I'VE MET A SPECIAL GIRL
I HOPE SHE'LL BE MY WIFE
THOUGH SHE'S A BUMPKIN
SHAPED LIKE A PUMPKIN
I CAN TELL SHE'S THE LOVE OF MY LIFE
SHE'S GOT A SPECIAL STYLE
I WOULDN'T CALL IT CHARM
GRUNTING AND SQUEALING
WON'T BE APPEALING
IF SHE EVER GETS OFF OF THE FARM
SHE
SPENDS HER TIME WITH THE COWS AND THE SHEEP
SHE'S
JUST SUBLIME IF YOU DON'T BREATHE TOO DEEP.
SEEN IN A CERTAIN LIGHT
WOW! WHAT A SILHOUETIE.
CROSS A TOMATO
WITH A POTATO
SHE'S THE MODEL OF WHAT YOU'D GET.
I
THINK SHE'S COOL, LOCAL GUYS SAY SHE'S HOT.
SHE
WAS BEST IN SCHOOL, BUT THEY WON'T SAY AT WHAT.
L3.3
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
DON'T TRY TO CHANGE MY MIND
I'VE NEVER BEEN TOO SMART
STILL, I'M NO SHIFTER
IF I CAN LIFT HER
I WILL CARRY HER IN MY HEART.
Armado
Very funny.
(enter Dull and Jaquenetta)
Du"
(to Armado)
Sir, I got called in to ge a 411 on a 24-36-WD-40 ... 1 heard these felons were
perpetratin' on Henry's property. Transgressing, osculating, all sorts of nasty stuff. I
brought them here for a Y2K-420 -- that's an "10" for all you who don't know the lingo.
I just need you to tell me that these are the ones you talked about in the letter, and I'"
take them down to the police station.
Mote
"Them?" I only see one ...
Oops. Be right back.
Dull
(to Jaquenetta) Don't move.
(Dull exits)
Armado
(aSide) I can't let her know yet. (to Jaquenetta) Hello.
Jaquenetta
Hello.
Armado
I'm sorry to do this to you. I was just following the rules.
Jaquenetta
(stares him down)
Armado
They'll probably just make you do community service.
Jaquenetta
(condescendingly) Oh, Lord, aren't you wise?
............
,.
Armado
(confessing his love) I will tell thee wonders .
1.3.4
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
Jaquenetta
With that face?
"See My Eyes"
Armado
SEE MY EYES
HOW THEY IMPLORE YOU
READ MY MIND
I'LL BE YOUR BOOK
WATCH MY LIPS
SAY I ADORE YOU
IT'S A SNAP
IT TAKES NO ART
YOU WON'T EVEN NEED A SECOND LOOK
I love you.
Can't you see that?
Jaquenetta
I hear you say it, but I'm not so sure I believe you. How can you love me when we only
just met?
Armado
LOOK AT ME
IT'S AS I TOLD YOU
I WAS YOURS
RIGHT FROM THE START
ALL OUR LIVES
AS WE GROW OLD
THESE ARMS WILL HOLD YOU
MY LOVE ENFOLD YOU
AND I WILL WEAR YOU IN MY HEART.
I never believed in love at first sight until I met you.
Jaquenetta
CAN I BELIEVE IN YOU?
MAYBE THE WORDS ARE TRUE
BUT WHEN THE SPRING IS GONE
AND SKIES GROW COLD ABOVE ME
WILL YOU LOVE ME?
IF YOU'D SAY:
NOT JUST FOR A SUMMER
MAYBE I'D SAY:
HERE'S WHERE WE START
-
Armado
ALL OUR LIVES
I WILL BE BOLD FOR YOU
1.3.5
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
THOUGH WE GROW OLD
THOUGH STARS GROW COLD
I STILL WILL WEAR YOU IN MY HEART.
Dull
(enters with Costard in tow)
Found him! Now, Mr. Armado, I'll need you to give me the word, and I'll throw these
sick puppies in the slammer.
Armado
(it pains him to say this and he lets Jaquenetta know it)
Yes, they are the two from the Navarre property. The beauty and the twerp. Do with
them what you will.
Jaquenetta
(to Costard) Don't worry. I'm sure it'll all work out.
Costard
(bitterly sarcastic) Well, I look forward to my merry days of desolation.
Dull
Let's go, kids.
.-
Armado
Farewell, my love. I'll see you soon .
(to Dull, being careful not to have Jaquenetta hear)
Make sure you get me that boy's reward in cash.
(Dull exits with Costard and Jaquenetta in tow.)
Armado
(to himself) So love has finally conquered the Spaniard's sword! Who would have
known? Oh, she's wonderful. (to Mote) I wonder when I'll see her again.
Mote
I know it's none of my business, sir, but if you really love this girl, why did you turn her
in to the sheriff? I know your habits by now, and if all this is just for the money ....
Armado
I had to find some way to get her away from that villain! Maybe you don't believe me,
but just you wait. I'll prove to you that I really do love this girl.
-
ALL OUR LIVES
I WILL BE BOLD FOR YOUIHER
THOUGH WE GROW OLD
THOUGH STARS GROW COLD
I STILL WILL WEAR YOUIHER IN MY HEART.
(Armado and Mote exit)
1.4.1
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
ACT ONE
Scene four
(The front yard of the Navarre cottage. The four guys are reading, writing, etc. Enter
Regina, Rosaline, Maria and Katherine.)
"Bonjour"
REGINA:
BONJOUR!
WE HAVE COME FROM FAR OFF FRANCE.
MARIA:
AND WE'RE GLAD TO HAVE THIS CHANCE.
ROSALINE
POUR FAIRE VOTRE CONNAISSANCE.
KATHERINE
HI THERE
REGINA:
THIS
IS A PERFECT PLACE TO LET,
MARIA
IT'S A MARVEL--KATHERINE:
C'EST CHOUETTE!
ROSALINE
AND IT'S BETTER THAN WE'D HOPE TO GET.
ALL 4
WE
WILL BE HAPPY HERE, I KNOW.
MARIA:
IT'S TOO KIND OF YOUROSALINE
C'ESTTROPKATHERINE
THAT YOU GIVE US OUR CHATEAU.
REGINA:
-
SO,
NOW,
KINDLY HAND TO ME THE KEYS.
1.4.2
Love Me, Love Me Not
--
ROSALINE:
AND THEN LEAVE US, IF YOU PLEASE.
ALL4
SO HAPPY WE MET!
HENRY: (1J...
Can I help you?
L
/10/'
.\~' r--'"\\'
Lr. Vi (!
J
Il
p,.....c-
1\. ::ff"~l'
REGINA:
Yes, I'm Regina Bourbon. I believe you are expecting us: we are the French exchange
students. We're moving into our summer cottage today. Could you help us with these
bags?
HENRY:
Excuse me?
REGINA:
We've had a long drive from the city. These bags are so heavy ...
HENRY:
I am afraid there must be some mistake. You see my friends and I have planned to stay
in this cottage for the summer. I know nothing about this.
REGINA:
I'm sorry, I have the lease right here.
(She hands him the lease)
You will see that it is perfectly legal.
(Berowne and Rosaline share a moment)
BEROWNE
Pardon me, mademoiselle, may I know your name?
ROSALINE
Why not? I am Rosaline.
BEROWNE:
DID WE MEET IN PARIS
ROSALINE:
NO, THAT ISN'T TRUE
IF WE DID, THEN I FORGOT IT
AND SO SHOULD YOU
-
HENRY:
Madam, your lease states that you have paid $450 dollars. This is only half of what is
required.
REGINA:
My father called from France, and spoke to a Mr. Navarre. He said he worked it all
out...
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
1.4.3
HENRY:
This cottage belongs to us. You could plead your case to the landlord. We will then be
glad to give up our position and become great friends. But unfortunately, the landlord
is my father and he is away for the summer on vacation. He ordered me to handle his
business here. I am very sorry madam! You could try the Y.
(Dumaine and Katherine share a moment)
DUMAINE
Good afternoon, Miss. I am Dumaine. And you are--?
KATHERINE
Katherine.
DUMAINE:
DO YOU COME HERE OFTEN
KATHERINE:
MARY, HAVE YOU HEARD?
IT'S THE VERY PHRASE MY BOOK PREDICTED
AND WORD FOR WORD!
-
REGINA:
You can't send us away! We've planned to spend the whole summer here. Our
exchange program isn't over until August and we don't have anywhere to go ...
HENRY:
I am sorry madam, but there is nothing I can do!
REGINA:
The only solution I can see is that we all share this cottage for a short time. It's the
least you could do for kicking us out with no notice ...
(Longaville and Maria share a moment)
LONGAVILLE
Bonjour mademoiselle. Je suis Longaville.
MARIA
Maria.
LONGAVILLE:
MAY I HAVE YOUR NUMBER?
MARIA:
YES, YOU'LL HAVE TO WAIT
IF YOU'D BE MINE PLEASE JOIN THE LINE:
NUMBER ONE-SIX-EIGHT
-.
HENRY
We can't share the cottage.
1.4.4
Love Me, Love Me Not
--
REGINA
(In a "princess" moment) Do you realize who my father is?!?
(This makes everyone stop and get up in HenryIRegina's conversation)
HENRY:
All four of us have agreed to an oath.
REGINA:
An oath!
HENRY:
Yes, an oath, not allowing us to be with women in any way for the duration of the
summer! So you see, sharing the cottage is impossible. Goodbye!
ROSALINE:
NO, YOU PERHAPS MISUNDERSTEWED,
MARIA
FOR OUR ENGLISH IS NOTGEWD,
KATHERINE
-
BUT YOU COULDN'T BE SO RUDE.
GUYS:
WHAI'LL WE DO?
THEY WON'T GO AWAY.
WHAI'LL WE DO?
THEY WILL ONLY SAY
THIS HOUSE IS THEIRS,
AND THEY'RE HERE TO STAY.
THEY'RE MOVING IN,
AND THEY THINK WE'RE GAY!
WHAI'LL WE DO? I WONDER
WHAI'LL WE DO?
WHAI'LL WE DO WITH
DO
WITH
REGINA
HERE,INTHE
TELEGRAM YOU
SAY, WE CAN
MOVE IN HERE TODAY, BUT YOU'RE
STANDING IN OUR
WAY
SO
GIRLS:
TO TURN US AWAY.
WE WON'T GO AWAY.
ALL WE HAVE TO SAY,
WE ARE HERE TO STAY,
YOU MUST GO AWAY.
WON'T GO
'WAY,
WON'T GO
WE'RE STAYING
WE'RE STAYING
OTHER 3 GIRLS
HERE
WON'T
GO
HOME
WON'T
GO
'WAY
SO
1.4.5
Love Me, Love Me Not
REGINA
-
NOW
KINDLY HAND TO US THE KEYS
ALL 4 GIRLS:
TO OUR CHAMBERS, IF YOU PLEASE
SO HAPPY WE MET,
SO HAPPY WE MET.
HENRY:
I wish I could let you stay, but there's nothing more I can do.
REGINA:
Fine. You asked for it. Since you won't let us have the house that is rightfully ours,
we'll have to camp out on your front lawn until this whole mess gets straightened out.
Sorry about your 'oath', boys, but we're here to stay!
1.5.1
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
ACT ONE
Scene five
(The center of town. Enter Armado and Mote.)
Armado
How, Mote, can I win my love?
Mote
Negligent student, learn her by heart.
Armado
By heart and in heart.
Mote
And out of heart. All these three.
Armado
What do you mean?
Mote
"By" heart you love her, because your heart cannot come by her; "in" heart you love
her, because your heart is in love with her; and "out" of heart you love her, being out of
heart that you cannot enjoy her.
Armado
How, then, am I supposed to woo her? Another song, perhaps?
Mote
You don't think the last one would have worked?
Armado
I don't think so. This love is for real. Warble, child.
hearing.
Make passionate my sense of
"Concolinel"
Mote
(While Mote sings, Armado copies down her lyrics into a letter)
HOW LOW SHE IS!
AND I'M SO HIGH!
WE'RE STAR AND STARLING SHE AND I.
DOES CUPID SEE US TWO COMBINED?
HE MUST BE BLIND,
HE MUST BE BLIND!
-
WHEN WINTER COMES
ALL WILL BE WELL
DON'T ASK ME HOW I KNOW, BUT I CAN TELL.
WHEN AUTUMN'S YELLOW LIGHT IS BARRED WITH SHADE,
AND NIGHTS GROW LONG AND COLD, DON'T BE AFRAID.
THOUGH WINTER BRINGS
THE DARK AND STORM,
1.5.2
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
I'LL WEAR YOU NEAR MY HEART AND YOU'LL BE WARM
TAKE HANDS WITH ME
WHILE SUMMER STILL IS BRIGHT.
I'LL TEACH YOU NOT TO FEAR
THE WINTER NIGHT.
Armado
(folding up the letter)
Ah. sweet air. Here, deliver this letter to my love.
Mote
I'm sorry, sir, but the only one who knows where to find her is that little "twerp"Costard.
And he's in jail, remember?
Armado
(sighing) Well, we'll just have to convince the sheriff to let him out. Tell her Armado
changed his mind ... or that he learned his lesson.· , And take this money to bribe her.
Hurry back.
Mote
With pleasure.
(She exits)
Armado
TAKE HANDS WITH ME
WHILE SUMMER STILL IS BRIGHT.
I'LL TEACH YOU NOT TO FEAR
THE WINTER NIGHT.
(enter Mote with Costard)
Armado
I gave you your liberty, set you free from sentence, and, in lieu thereof, impose on you
nothing but this: take this letter to the country maid Jaquenetta. Here is remuneration.
Mote, follow. (He exits).
Mote
As always, I follow. Mr. Costard, adieu. (She exits.)
Costard
"Remuneration!" Oh, that must be the Latin word for a buck. A buck - remuneration.
"What's the price of this item?" "One dollar." "No, I'll give you a remuneration." What a
sound, Remuneration! It's a better name than '·'Greenback." I wi" remember this word
for future use. (Looks at letter.) Oh my Jaquenetta, how could I lose you to this
Armado? How can I win you back ...
(Enter Berowne)
.-.
Costard! Good to have found you.
Berowne
I need you to deliver ...
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
1.5.3
Costard
Excuse me, sir, how many long-stemmed roses can a man buy for a remuneration?
Berowne
What is remuneration?
Costard
One dollar, of course.
Berowne
Well, then, a dollar's worth of roses.
Costard
Oh. Well, thank you, sir. Have a good day then. (He begins to exit.)
Berowne
Wait. I need you to make a delivery for me.
(Costard begins to protest, to turn to leave)
There will be remuneration.
Costard
I'm listening.
Berowne
~ The French girls will come by here to check out the medieval fair. One of them is
named Rosaline. Ask for her, and, into her hand only, deliver this sealed letter. Here
is your argent. (He gives him the money.)
Costard
Argent? (He looks at the money.) Oh argent! Ten times better than remuneration, ten
times more roses for Jaquenetta! Argent! I'll, do it sir. Argent! Remuneration.
(He exits out of ear-range of Berowne.)
Berowne
I can't believe I've actually let a woman get to me4-And not just any woman, but
Rosaline! I didn't think twice when I met her before.
"I Never Gave A Damn"
I NEVER GAVE A DAMN IF THE GIRL WAS TRUE.
I NEVER GAVE A DAMN IF HER EYES WERE BLUE.
I NEVER CARED WHAT SHE SAID SHE WANTED.
I HAD A GOAL, AND I WAS UNDAUNTED.
THAT WAS FUN, MY DARLING, NOW WE'RE DONE, I'M DONE WITH YOU!
Costard
BUT SHE'S SO TRUE
AND SHE'S SO SWEET
EYES OF SKY BLUE,
HAIR LIKE SUMMER WHEAT.
JUST HER DIMPLES
GIVE ME PIMPLES,
-
Love Me, Love Me Not
MAKE ME LONG FOR SOMETHING I COULD DO.
BUT ALL I'M SURE OF
IS, HER EYES ARE BLUE
Berowne
I HAD A BRIEF ROMANCE WITH HER ONCE BEFORE.
I DIDN'T LIKE IT THEN, NOW I HATE IT MORE.
SHE MAY BE CUTE, BUT SHE'S MUCH TOO CLEVER.
I COULDN'T BEAR TO LOVE HER FOREVER!
EYES ARE BROWN: THAT'S BAD, HER HAIR IS BROWN ... 0 GOD, WHY ME?
Costard
WHY NOT ME, GIRL,
WHY NOT ME?
I'M HER BEST FRIEND
AND WILL ALWAYS BE.
NEVER KISSED HER
SHE'S LIKE A SISTER
WE'LL HAVE PURE LOVE
IF SHE'LL JUST AGREE
FOR "M HER BEST FRIEND
AND WILL ALWAYS BE
Berowne
I ONLY HOPE AND PRAY THIS IS ALL A DREAM
Costard
FAIR HAIR, BLUE EYES
Berowne
FROM WHICH I'LL SOON AWAKE, IF I DON'T I'LL SCREAM
Costard
WELCOME, BLUE SKIES
WE'LL HAVE OUR LOVE AND TIME WON'T DESTROY IT
Berowne
AND I REFUSE TO LIKE OR ENJOY IT.
I WON'T HAVE HER BABIES, KIDS ARE WORSE THAN RABIES
Costard
MAYBE SOME DAY,--
Berowne
IT'S WORSE THAN ANY DISEASE!
Costard
IN MY DUMB WAY, --
Berowne
TO THINK I'D GET ON MY KNEES!
1.5.4
Love Me, Love Me Not
.-
1.5.5
Costard
I'LL FIND SOME WAY, -Berowne
AND EVEN HAND HER THE KNIFE!
Costard
TO SPEAK MY HEART
AND SAY "PLEASE:
BE MY
WIFE"
ALL MY
LIFE
I'LL HAVE
LOVE!
Berowne
TAKE OUT MY HEART,
ONLY PLEASE!
BE MY
I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD LOSE
ALL MY
SENSE OF PROPORTION AND CHOOSE
TO HAVE
A HUNDRED MISERIES
LIFE!
A THOUSAND AGONIES
LOVE!
AND JOIN THE MILLIONS WHO
LIFE!
-
LOVE!
EXIST IN BONDAGE TO
LOVE!
(throughout song, Costard holds the two letters; he finally decides to SWITCH them,
intentionally. )
1.6.1
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
ACT ONE
Scene Six
(The Medieval Fair. The four girls enter, look around, and play with the bows and
arrows at the "You Pricket You Bought it" Stand.)
Rosaline
So what did you think of those guys at the house?
Maria
Pretty pompous.
Regina
Arrogant.
Katherine
Cute.
Rosaline
They were, weren't they?
Regina
~
I think this could turn out to be an interesting summer, after a". With a little help from
Cupid, we could have some real FUN with these guys ...
--
(Holofernes Enters)
Holofernes
Greetings, Wenches. Welcome to the annual Medieval Fair. I am Dr. Holofernes,
distinguished professor of Englsh literature, Religious Studies, Japanese Culture,
Italian Cuisine and pottery at the Eden Valley Community College, and I'm helping out
today. Shall I lend you my arm, Madame, and show you the royal customs? This, fair
maid, is "The Deer Hunt!" Take your aim and win your prize!
Regina
Well, professor, where do I stand?
Holofernes
Hereby, upon the edge of yonder coppice, A stand where you may make the fairest
shoot.
Regina
(Looking at bow, Confused)
How exactly should I go about doing this?
Holofernes
We", I did teach a summer seminar on the skills of archery, darts, and the javelin. It
was entitled, "You Get the Point." (getting no response from his wit) We" ... let's begin.
Stand with your feet at shoulder's width, knees slightly bent, head up, stomach in,
chest out. Squint your left eye whilst tilting your head to the left. Hold the bow at an
83.21 degree angle with the ground, pulling on the string with 32.7 pounds of
pressure. Oh and don't forget to hold out your pinky. Always consider etiquette.
1.6.2
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
Regina
(dropping the ridiculous pose) What willi win if I hit the deer?
Holofernes
Hit your target and he's yours for life!
Regina
I see.
nCupid n
BUT COME: THE BOW
NOW BEAUTY GOES TO KILL
WHY SHOULD I HURT MY DEER?
AND YET I WILL
ADMIRING FRIENDS
ARE URGING ME ON
TO TAKE MY CHANCE
BEFORE MY CHANCE IS GONE
DRINKING THEIR PRAISE
MY THIRST FOR GLORY CLIMBS
AND I GROW GUILTY OF
DELICIOUS CRIMES
CUPID, SEE THE ARROW?
FOLLOW IT AS IT FLIES
CUPID, GUIDE MY LITTLE ARROW
RIGHT BETWEEN HIS BEAUTIFUL EYES
OTHER 3
EYES
REGINA
CUPID
OTHERS
HUM
REGINA
BE MY TEACHER
OTHERS
HUM
REGINA
CUPID, PLEASE TAKE MY PART
OTHERS
ZING
-
REGINA
AIM ME AT THIS PRINCE TURNED PREACHER
SEND ME TO HIS HEART
1.6.3
Love Me, Love Me Not
,-
OTHERS
I HAVE IN MY QUIVER
WHAT WILL MAKE HIM SHIVER
REGINA
WHEN I DELIVER IT
TO HIS HEART
OTHERS
CUPID, BE MY TEACHER
REGINA
CUPID, HELP ME
OTHERS
CUPID, TAKE MY PART
REGINA
PLEASE NOW
ALL
CUPID, GUIDE MY GOLDEN ARROW
RIGHT TO HIS HEART
TO HIS HEART!
-
(Costard enters)
Costard
Pray you, which is the head lady?
Princess
You'll know her by the rest that have no heads.
Costard
Who is in charge, the tallest?
Rosaline
The thickest and the tallest.
Costard
The thickest and the tallest: it is so, truth is truth. Are not you the chief woman? You
are the thickest here.
Princess
What's your will, sir?
Costard
I have a letter from Mr. Berowne to one Mademoiselle Rosaline.
-
Princess
I'll take that, thank you .
.
(Costard Exits)
1.6.4
Love Me, Love Me Not
Rosaline
-
But...
Regina
I am the head mistress. Have you forgotten so soon, Ros. I am the THICKEST and the
tallest. Why, you even said so yourself, Chubs. Let's just open this up and see what it
is. Oh, a love letter ...
"Shall I command thy love? I may. I may. Shall I enforce thy love? I COUld. Shall I
entreat thy love? I will. What shalt thou exchange for rags? Robes. For Triffles? Titles.
For thysef? Me. Thus, expecting thy reply, I profane my lips on thy foot, my eyes on thy
picture, and my art on thy every part.
Thine, in the dearest design of industry,
KatlMarialReg
"Don Adriano Armado."
Maria
It's a letter for Jaquenetta.
Rosaline
What Nonsense.
Princess
[to Rosaline] Here, sweet, put this up; twill be thine another day .
.-
Katherine
I wish I would get one.
Rosaline
(a little hurt by the letter mix-up)
I didn't want one anyway. Love letters are so cliche.
"Cupid: Part II"
REGINA
IF PRIDE MUST FALL
IT NEEDS A LITTLE SHOVE
I'M JUST A HELPING HAND
MARIA
THE CAUSE IS LOVE
ROSALINE
CAN LOVE TOUCH HIM?
HE THINK'S THAT HE'S IMMUNE
-
REGINA
MY LITTLE ARROW SINGS A DIFF'RENT TUNE
KATHERINE
LIFE IS TOO SHORT
TO PLAY AT WAIT AND SEE
Lo~'e ,~fe,
1.6.5
Love Me Not
HE HAS TO GET !T NOW
-
ALL
HIS FATE IS ME.
CUPID, THERE'S OUR TARGET
THINKING HE'S OH-SO-WISE
CUPID, HELP ME LAND A MESSAGE
RIGHT BETWEEN HIS BEAUTIFUL EYES
REGINA
CUPID
ROSALINE
TWANG!
REGINA
I'M AN ARROW
KATHERINE
ZOOM!
REGINA
QUIVERING TO DEPART
-
MARIA
THA-WAP!
REGINA
AIM FOR MISTER STRAIGHT-AND-NARROW
SEND ME TO HIS HEART
ALL
HE THINKS HE'S SO SUPER-SMART
HE THINKS YOU CAN'T HIT HIS HEART
SO WHEN YOU CHOOSE YOUR DART
REGINA
PLEASE CHOOSE ME
OTHERS
CUPID, BE MY SHOOTER
REGINA
I'LL ADORE YOU
OTHERS
CHOOSE ME FOR YOUR DART
-
REGINA
IFYOU
1.6.6
Love Me, Love Me Not
ALL
-
SEND ME LIKE A GOLDEN ARROW
STRAIGHT TO
KATHERINE
I HAVE IN MY LlTILE PURSE
WHAT WILL MAKE HIS FEVER WORSE
KATHERINEIMARIA
WHEN HE CRIES FOR HIS NURSE
REGINA
CALL FOR ME
OTHERS
CUPID, BE THE DOCTOR
REGINA
BE MY PARTNER
OTHERS
PUT ME IN HIS CHART
ALL
---
-.
SHOOT ME LIKE A POISON ARROW
STRAIGHT TO HIS HEART
TO HIS HEART!
I. 7.1
Love Me, Love Me Not
ACT ONE
Scene seven
(Elsewhere at the Medieval Fair. Holofernes, Nathalie and Dull enter.)
Holofernes
Well, the Medieval Fair seems to be going quite well. The girls from France had quite
a lot of luck with the You-Pricket- You-Bought-It stand.
Nathalie
Excellent! And the styrofoam deer were a brilliant idea! But tell me again: is it the
pricket that's a four-year old buck?
Holofernes
No, my dear. The pricket is 2 years old, the sorel-3 years old, and the sore is a buck
in its fourth year. I've composed a short ode on the subject.
Holofernes
The preyful princess pierced and pricked a pretty pleasing pricket,
Some say a sore, but not a sore till now made sore with shooting.
The dogs did yell. Put "I" to "sore," then sorel jumps from thicket,
Or pricket sore, or else sorel. The people fall a-hooting.
If sore be sore, then "L" to "sore" makes fifty sores o'sorel.
Of one sore I an hundred make by adding but one more "L."
Nathalie
A rare talent.
Dull
Hey, I've got one! How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could
chuck wood?
o
Holofernes
thou monster ignorance, how deformed dost thou look!
Dull
No, seriously, I've always wondered that.
Nathalie
Sir, she hath never fed of the dainties that are bred in a book.
She hath not eat paper, as it were; she hath not drunk ink.
Her intellect is not replenished.
She is only an anima/' only sensible in the duller parts.
Unlike you.
Holofernes
This is a gift that I have, simple, simple-a foolish extravagant spirit, full of forms,
figures, shapes, objects, ideas, apprehensions, motions, revolutions. These are begot
in the ventricle of memory, nourished in the womb of pia mater, and delivered upon
the mellowing of occasion. But the gift is good in those in whom it is acute, and I am
thankful for it.
1.7.2
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
Nathalie
Sir, I praise the Lord for you, and so do the rest of my parishioners.
Holofernes
Vir sapis qui pauca loquitur. A man is wise who says little.
Jaquenetta
(offstage) Reverend Nathaliel
Holofernes
But soft, a soul feminine saluteth us.
(Enter Jaquenetta and Costard.)
Jaquenetta
Reverend Nathalie, I just got this letter. Could you explain it for me? I think it's in
French, or something. It was given to me by Costard, and sent to me from Don
Armado. I can't understand a word of it.
Nathalie
It's a sonnet, a love poem.
Holofernes
Let us hear a stanza.
"If Love Make Me Forsworn"
Nathalie
IF LOVE MAKE ME FORSWORN, HOW SHALL I SWEAR TO LOVE?
AH, NEVER FAITH COULD HOLD, IF NOT TO BEAUTY VOWED!
THOUGH TO MYSELF FORSWORN, TO THEE I'LL FAITHFUL PROVE.
THOSE THOUGHTS THAT WERE MY OAKS, TO THEE LIKE WILLOWS BOWED.
Holofernes
You find not the apostrophes, and so miss the accent. Let me supervise the canzonet.
(He takes the paper)
IF LOVE MAKE ME FORSWORN, HOW SHALL I SWEAR TO LOVE?
Nathalie
AH, NEVER FAITH COULD HOLD, IF NOT TO BEAUTY VOWED!
Holofernes
THOUGH TO MYSELF FORSWORN, TO THEE I'LL FAITHFUL PROVE.
Nathalie
THOSE THOUGHTS THAT WERE MY OAKS, TO THEE LIKE WILLOWS BOWED.
Holofernes
STUDY HIS BIAS LEAVES AND MAKES HIS BOOK THINE EYES,
Nathalie
WHERE ALL THOSE PLEASURES LIVE THAT ART WOULD COMPREHEND.
IF KNOWLEDGE BE THE GOAL, THEN TO KNOW THEE SHALL SUFFICE.
1.7.3
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
.
WELL-LEARNED THE TONGUE THAT WELL CAN THEE COMMEND .
Both
ALL IGNORANT THAT SOUL THAT SEES THEE WITHOUT WONDER;
Nathalie
WHICH IS TO ME SOME PRAISE THAT I THY PARTS ADMIRE.
Holofernes
THY EYE JOVE'S LIGHTNING BEARS,
Nathalie
THY VOICE HIS DREADFUL THUNDER,
WHICH, NOT TO ANGER BENT, IS MUSIC
Holofernes
AND SWEET FIRE.
Both
CELESTIAL AS THOU ART, 0 PARDON LOVE THIS WRONG,
THAT SINGS HEAVEN'S PRAISE WITH SUCH AN EARTHLY TONGUE.
(dance)
All
CELESTIAL AS THOU ART, 0 PARDON LOVE THIS WRONG,
THAT SINGS HEAVEN'S PRAISE WITH SUCH AN EARTHLY TONGUE.
Holofernes
Now, how did you receive this letter and from whom?
Jaquenetta
I told you! Costard brought it. It's from Armado.
Holofernes
I will overglance the superscript: "To the snow-white hand of the most beautous Lady
Rosaline." And the closing: "Your Ladyship's in a/l desired employment, Berowne."
Reverend Nathalie, this Berowne is one of the young gentlemen staying at the cottage
with Henry, and this was written to one of the French girls. As usual, our delivery
system leaves much to be desired.
(To Jaquenetta)
Trip and go, my sweet. Deliver this paper into the hand of Navarre. It may concern
much. Stay not thy compliment. I forgive thy duty. Adieu.
(She stands, blank look.)
Give this to Henry. It's important.
-.
.
Jaquenetta
Costard, come with me .
Costard
Right behind you!
1.7.4
Love Me, Love Me Not
(Costard and Jaquenetta exit.)
-
Holofernes
Well, time for dinner. From a feast for the mind to a feast for the belly. Adieu,
Reverend.
Nathalie
Oh, oh, okay.
(He almost exits.)
Oh, sir?
(He turns)
Oh, nothing.
Holofernes
(Noticing) I'm attending the $3 all-you-can-eat fish fry at Maybelle's. Would you care
to accompany me?
Nathalie
It would be my pleasure.
(Dull alone.)
Holofernes
Would you like to join us also?
-<
.-
Dull
Great. So, what's black and white and read all over?
(A look from Holofernes and Nathalie.)
(They exit.)
1.8a.1
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
ACT ONE
Scene eight- Part A
(The garden behind the summer cottage. Berowne enters.)
Berowne:
I am not in love. I am not in love! Well, I do nothing in the world but lie. By God, I do
love, and it has taught me to rhyme and to be melancholy. And here is part of my
rhyme, and here is my melancholy. She already has one of my sonnets. The clown
bore it, the fool sent it, and the lady has it. Sweet clown, sweeter fool, that sweetest
lady. Oh what I wouldn't give to be done with this dreadful oath. If only my friends
were as weak as I in the ways of love! I would rejoice! -But wait, what's this? Here
comes Henry with a paper of some sort. This could prove interesting indeed.
(He hides in a tree.)
(Henry enters with a paper.)
Henry
(As if addressing his love)
My fair Regina ...
Berowne:
(Aside)
Ha! I'm not alone after all! It looks like no one can hide from sweet Cupid's eye!
"All In Love"
Henry
Please accept this offering in rhyme.
(Reads)
SO SWEET A KISS THE GOLDEN SUN GIVES NOT
TO THOSE FRESH MORNING DROPS UPON THE ROSE
AS THY EYEBEAMS, WHEN THEIR FRESH RAYS HAVE SMOTE
THE NIGHT OF DEW THAT ON MY CHEEKS DOWN FLOWS.
NOR SHINES THE SILVER MOON ONE-HALF SO BRIGHT
THROUGH THE TRANSPARENT BOSOM OF THE DEEP
AS DOTH THY FACE, THROUGH TEARS OF MINE, GIVE LIGHT.
THOU SHIN'ST IN EVERY TEAR THAT I DO WEEP.
Who knows what she'll think, but I must send it. Who's here?
(Enter Longaville, with papers. Henry steps aside.)
What, Longaville, and reading! I must hide.
Berowne:
(Aside)
I knew it! Another pawn in the game of love arrives.
Longaville:
(Singing)
AY ME! I AM FORSWORN.
'\k
t
1.8a.2
Love Me, Love Me Not
Berowne:
(Aside)
Why, he comes in singing. Quick someone get him an agent!
King:
(Aside)
In love, I hope! Sweet fellowship in shame.
Berowne:
(Aside)
One drunkard loves another of the name.
Longaville:
Am I the first that have been perjured so?
Berowne:
(Aside)
Should I let my lovesick friends know they are not alone? Nah, it's more fun to watch.
Longaville:
I'm afraid these lines lack the power to move her.
Longaville:
(He sings the sonnet.)
DID NOT THE HEAVENLY RHETORIC OF THINE EYE,
'GAINST WHOM THE WORLD CANNOT HOLD ARGUMENT
PERSUADE MY HEART TO THIS FALSE PERJURY?
VOWS FOR THEE BROKE DESERVE NOT PUNISHMENT.
A WOMAN I FORSWORE, BUT I WILL PROVE,
THOU BEING A GODDESS, I FORSWORE NOT THEE.
MY VOW WAS EARTHLY, THOU A HEAVENLY LOVE.
THY GRACE BEING GAINED CURES ALL DISGRACE IN ME.
Berowne:
(Aside)
Oh, this is a good, we are making flesh a diety.
These women are our goddesses.
God please forgive us.
Longaville:
My sweet Maria, do I dare send this letter? But who's this interrupting my dreaming?
Dumaine! Ha, I will hide until he has gone.
(Enter Dumaine, with a paper.)
o most divine Kate!
-
Dumaine:
Berowne:
(Aside)
Oh most profane dimwit!
Love Me, Love Me Not
I.Sa.3
Dumaine:
She is as fair as day.
Berowne:
(Aside)
As some days, and a day like that I'd stay in bed! (Give disgusted look)
Dumaine:
0, that I had my wish!
Longaville:
(Aside)
And I had mine!
Henry
(Aside)
And mine too, good Lord!
Berowne
Amen! Hear me good Lord so I have mine too.
Dumaine:
I'll woo her with this sonnet I've written.
-
Berowne:
Oh, now there's an original idea!
Dumaine:
(Sings his "sonnet")
ON A DAY-ALACK THE DAY!LOVE, WHOSE MONTH IS EVER MAY
SPIED A BLOSSOM PASSING FAIR,
PLAYING INTHEWANTONAIR.
THROUGH THE VELVET LEAVES THE WIND,
ALL UNSEEN, CAN PASSAGE FIND;
THAT THE LOVER, SICK TO DEATH
WISHED HIMSELF THE HEAVEN'S BREATH.
Berowne/Longaville/Henry
DUMAINE IS TRULY SMITTEN
Dumaine
This willi send and something else more plain.
BILlH
BUT MINE IS BETTER WRITTEN
-
Dumaine
That shall express my true love's fasting pain.
B/UH
HE'S SORT OF CLEVER
1.8a.4
Love Me, Love Me Not
Dumaine
-
If only the other three were lovers too.
B/UH
BUT MINE WILL LAST FORVER
Dumaine
Then we'd all be in it together.
Longaville:
Irs TIME TO CHANGE THE TUNE.
(Coming forward)
MISTER DUMAINE, I'VE GOT A BONE TO PICK
I HEARD YOUR SONG AND IT WAS PRETTY VILE
WHAT YOU HAVE DONE HERE REALLY MAKES ME SICK
IT SEEMS THAT LOYALTY IS NOT YOUR STYLE.
Henry
HOLD ON A MINUTE, YOU'RE AS BAD AS HE
I'M AWF'LL Y DISAPPOINTED WITH YOU BOTH
ONE THING THAT BUGS ME IS HYPOCRISY
YOU WENT AND TRAMPLED ON A SACRED OATH
Berowne
(Jumping out of tree)
WHAT'S ALL THE NOISE THERE - OH, MY GOD, IT'S YOU
WELL THIS IS AWKWARD BUT ~T MUST BE FACED
FROM WHAT I'VE HEARD IT SEEMS THAT ONE THING'S TRUE:
YOU THREE ARE TOTALLY DISGRACED!
Dumairie/Longaville/Henry
LOOKS LIKE WE'VE ALL BEEN DISCOVERED
LOOKS LIKE THE SECRET'S UNCOVERED
LOOKS LIKE BEROWNE HEARD IT ALL FROM ABOVE
THERE'S NO DENYING THAT WE'RE ALL IN
Berowne
SO MUCH FOR BOOKS AND FOR STUDIES
SO MUCH FOR VOWS TO YOUR BUDDIES
ALL THAT IT TOOK WAS A LOOK AND A SHOVE
TO SEND YOU SPRAWLlN' SO YOU'D FALL IN
Other 3
THAT TWIT FOUND OUT WE'RE IN
Berowne
TO WIT- NO DOUBT YOU'RE IN
Other 3
OH SHIT, HE KNOWS WE'RE ALL IN
LOVE!
Love Me, Love Me Not
1.8b.2
Berowne
Sweet lords, sweet lovers, 0, let us embrace.
As true we are as flesh and blood can be.
The sea will ebb and flow, heaven show his face;
Young blood doth not obey an old decree.
We cannot cross the cause why we were born;
Therefore of all hands must we be forsworn.
-
*"
Costard
[from behind a bush]
What about the contract?!
King
Oh yes, the contract. Berowne, you've got to find a loop-hole. To prove our loving
lawful and our faith not torn.
-
Berowne
Right!
From women's eyes this doctrine I derive.
They sparkle still the right Promethean fire.
They are the books, the arts, the academes
That show, contain, and nourish all the world.
Else none at all in ought proves excellent.
Let us lose our oaths to find ourselves,
Or else we lose ourselves to keep our oaths.
Understand?
We need love! These girls may teach us more than all our months of study!
King
Well, what the hell? What're we waiting for?
"Act One Finale"
King
IT'S VERY SIMPLE, IT'S VERY STRONG
WE WERE TOO SIMPLE, AND WE WERE WRONG
IT WASN'T VIRTUE WE WERE WINNING
OUR PLAN WAS DOOMED FROM THE BEGINNING
THIS LOVE PLATONIC IS NOTHING REAL
IT'S JUST MORONIC, NO WAY IDEAL
OLD PLATO BUILT THIS GREAT BIG SYSTEM
BECAUSE NO WOMAN EVER KISSED 11M
FOR LOVE IS LEARNED IN A LADY'S EYE
IT ISNT IN YOUR BRAIN
LOVE'S THE THING THAT TAKES YOU BY SURPRISE
IT'S NOT EXACTLY SANE
-
ADVANCE YOUR STANDARDS
SAINT CUPID IS OUR PATRON
Love Me, Love Me Not
1.8b.3
Guys
-
[throwing away sonnets]
WE DON'T NEED A MASTERPIECE
WHAT WE NEED'S A FASTER PIECE
ACTION LIKE A PLAY
OR A DANCE TO CATCH THE EYE
Longaville
YES, A PLAY
Dumaine
NO, A DANCE
Berowne
SOMETHING ELSE
Henry
SOMETHING SMART
Longavilie/Dumaine
SOMETHING SHARP
All
A MASQUERADE!
-
Dumaine
FOR KATHERINE
Berowne
FOR ROSALINE
Longaville
MARIA
Henry
HER MAJESTY
Dumaine
AND I WILL LOVE ONLY HER 'TIL THE DAY I DIE
Berowne
AND I WILL LOVE ONLY HER 'TIL THE DAY I DIE
Longaville
AND I WILL LOVE ONLY HER 'TIL THE DAY I DIE
-,
Henry
AND I WILL LOVE ONLY HER 'TIL THE DAY I DIE
ALL
TO THE DAY I DIE, TO THE DAY I DIE,
TO THE DAY I, DAY I,
DU DU DU DU .....
TO THE DAY I DIE!
11.1.1
Love Me, Love Me Not
ACT TWO
Scene One
(The girls' campsite. They are sunbathing, while examing the letters and packages
they have received.)
Regina
I could get used to being the center of attention. Who knows ... we may never leave.
Maria
Longaville gave me some pearls and a very long letter.
Regina
Too bad the pearls aren't longer than the letter.
Maria
No kidding! What did Dumaine send you, Katherine?
Katherine
I got...a glove!!!
Regina
Just...A GLOVE?!
(Katherine looks in her package again)
Katherine
Oh wow! TWO!! He wrote this long letter, but it was so stupid. I couldn't even
understand a word of it.
Regina
We are wise girls to mock our lovers so.
Rosaline
They are worse fools to purchase mocking so. I'd like to say a few words to Berowne
right now ...
Regina
Speaking of Berowne ... What did you get in your package, Ros?
(Rosaline pulls out a tacky flower pin)
Rosaline
Oh .... uh ... it's nothing important.
Regina
Come on Rosaline.
(Ros pulls out her gift heSitantly and they all laugh)
Rosaline
What? It's not that bad!
(Pause. Then the three girls start laughing again)
Maybe if I were as ... (catches herself starting to insult Regina) ... pretty as you, then I
might get nicer gifts. Oh, I have verses also. Something to the effect of me being "the
fairest goddess on the ground. I am compared to twenty thousand fairs." And, he drew
11.1.2
Love Me, Love Me Not
my picture in the letter.
--
Katherine
Oh, that's great. It looks just like you.
Regina
I think it makes you look like a cow.
Rosaline
Well, at least the letter was flattering. How I will make him fawn, beg and seek, and
wait the season, and spend his very few wits in silly poetry.
Regina
Why don't you dangle a bone in front of him? That's always worked for you in the past.
Hey, Pierre was even potty trained.
Rosaline
He shall be my fool and I his fate.
Regina
If he chooses you for his fate, he is a fool.
Rosaline
You know what...you're fat!
Regina
Look what Henry sent me.
(Katherine and Maria ad lib "oo's and ah's)
Rosaline
So .... is that all?
Regina
No, I was also given a letter. As much Jove in rhyme as could be crammed up in a
sheet of paper, written on both sides of the page, in the margins and all. Signed
Cupid. A.K.A. Henry.
Rosaline
And just like cupid, Henry is and will eternally be a boy. Oh, speaking of immature
members of the male sex ...
(Enter Costard)
Costard
(struggling with his memorization, occasionally checks script)
Prepare, madam, prepare. Arm, wenches, arm. Encounters mounted are against your
peace. Love doth approach, disguised, armed in arguments. You'll be surprised.
Muster your wits, stand in your own defense, or hide your heads like
cowards ... (forgetting what's going on, in his "own world") I'm a coward. I have been
all my life. I should have asked Jaquenetta to the 7th grade Valentine's dance. I had
everything planned out. It was perfect. .. the flowers, my dad's aftershave, my brown
corduroy suit, and reservations at McDonalds. I even sat beside her in history
everyday, but I couldn't muster up the courage to ask her out. God!! What's wrong with
me? ..
11.1.3
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
Rosaline
(getting frustrated with Costard, she clears her throat)
Do you have something you would like to say of importance, or are you going to rabble
on about your pathetic life for the rest of ...
Regina
(cutting off Ros)
Did you have something you needed to tell us?
Costard
Oh yeah ... (pulls out a prepared script, announcing) Ladies, I have come on behalf of
four highly talented and most unusually handsome and eligible young gentlemen to
invite you to a series of festivities to be held at the commodious Moose Lodge. Each of
the gentlemen has asked me to deliver to his lady fair a personal letter in which he
pours out his inner-most, and very personal, feelings for you. You are invited to attend
the masquerade ball this evening to be held in your honor. They are looking forward
to your arrival. Thank you and good afternoon
(The ladies read their respective invitations. They begin the first line aloud, but
reading to them selves until they realize they all have the same invitation.)
All
To my exquisitely elegant and beautifully blossoming chrysanthemum.
(they look at each other)
Maria
(continuing)
... Wear your favor to the ball tonight, so that I may recognize you.
Rosaline
(continuing)
... Then I may sweep you away to a private rendezvous where we two lovebirds may
chirp and nest.. .. blah, blah ....
(Princess and Rosaline give each other a look)
Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Maria
I know what you're thinking.
(smiling)
Katherine
(finishing the letter, unaware of what's going on)
Oh .... that is so romantic!
-
Regina
Katherine sweetie, we're not going to give them the power. I say let's have a
little fun with these guys. Here Rosaline, Take this jewel and I'll wear
your ... thing.
Maria
Love Me, Love Me Not
Katherine, I'll wear your gloves and you'll wear my pearls.
--
Rosaline
We'll show those Don Juan's. We'll just see were their ridiculous ball will get
them. Love. Humph! It's everything you DON'T want in life.
Katherine
OR everything you DO ...
"LOVE CAN BE FATAL"
Katherine
LOVE IS A PLEASURE
ROSALINE
LOVE IS A PAIN
MARIA
LOVE IS A R IDOLE
REGINA
DRIVES YOU INSANE
REG/ROS
LOVE IS A CURSE
LOVE CAN BE FATAL
MARIA
LOVE IS A DAYDREAM
REGINA
MAKING YOU WEEP
ROSALINE
LOVE IS A NIGHTMARE
KATHERINE
GUARDING YOUR SLEEP
REG/ROS
AND WHAT IS WORSE
LOVE CAN BE FATAL
ROSALINE
OTHER GIRLS DON'T SEEM TO MIND
LOVE
REGINA
THEY'RE CONTENT IF THEY FIND
SOME WAY YO FIND LOVE
MARIA
I THOUGHT LOVE WOULD NEVER
AIMATME
KATHERINE
THOUGHT I'D STAY FREE
ALL
-
11.1.4
AND NOW ITS ALL
I DREAM OF
MARIA
CUPID'S A BULLY,
BLOCKING YOUR WA Y
KATHERINE
CUPID'S A HUNTER
-
-
.-
Love Me, Love Me Not
ROSALINE
YOU ARE THE PREY
ALL
LOVE'S ALWAYS SAD
SOMETIMES IT'S FATAL
ROSALINE
LOVE IS A NUISANCE
KATHERINE
LOVE IS A TOY
MARIA
LOVE IS A MADNESS
REGINA
ALL FOR SOME BOY
REGINA/ROSALINE
HE'S NOT JUST BAD,
HE CAN BE FATAL
ALL
OTHER GIRLS WANT EMBRACE
LOVE
SO NAIVE THEy'LL EVEN GO OUT
AND CHASE LOVE
ROSALINE
I KEPT MY HEART HIDDEN
SAFE AND SOUND
I WENT AROUND
NOT THINKING
ALL
LOVE COULD WOUND ME
REGINA
THINK YOU'RE TOO LUCKY
ROSALINE
THINK YOU'RE TOO SMART
KATHERINE
SOONER OR LATER
YOU LOSE YOUR HEART
ALL
SAD, BUT IT'S TRUE
LOVE CAN BE FATAL
TOO BAD FOR YOU
BUT, LOVE CAN BE FATAL
FATAL
TOO BAD FOR YOU
BUT, LOVE CAN BE FATAL
11.1.5
11.2.1
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
ACT TWO
Scene two
(Maybelle's diner. Holofernes, Nathalie and Dull have just finished eating lunch.
Holofernes and Nathalie are having semi-serious intelligent conversation while Du" is
stacking and playing with the butters and jellies.)
Holofernes
Satis quid sutficit.
Nathalie
I praise God for you, sir. Your reasons at lunch have been sharp and sententious,
pleasant without scurrility. You could teach that Don Adriano Armado a thing or two.
We were conversing this quondam day and ...
Holofernes
Speaking of Armado; the gentlemen have approached both him and myself and asked
if we would arrange a performance to impress the ladies.
Nathalie
A performance? Oh, that sounds wonderful!
Dull
(Interrupting) Excuse me, but did you say you were putting on a show?
-
Ho/ofernes
Yes, the gentlemen have asked for my guidance due to my superior intellect and
creative genius.
Dull
Yeah, that's great but can I be in it?!?
Nathalie
What will the performance be? And how will you decide who's in the ensemble?
Ho/ofernes
I haven't quite made a final decision on what we will present. ..
Dull
I can spin my rifle! (Ho/ofernes and Nathalie just look at her) What?! I'm good at it!
Ho/ofernes
It is my plan to ...
Dull
Watch this ...
Ho/ofernes
And how do you expect that to fit into any sort of performance to woo the ladies? This
is going to be high-class entertainment, not some amateurish variety show.
Dull
Oh please! This is my dream ...
11.2.2
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
"Show Business"
Dull
I ALWAYS KNEW
THAT I TRULY BELONGED IN SHOW BUSINESS
THAT IS MY ONLY AMBITION
EVERYTHING ELSE WAS JUST A TEMP POSITION
THROUGH ALL THE YEARS
THE DISAPPOINTMENTS AND ADVANCING AGE
I KEPT MY HOPES ALIVE
THAT THE DAY WOULD ARRIVE
WHEN I WOULD MAKE MY DEBUT ON THE STAGE
Holofemes
I'VE ALWAYS THOUGHT
THERE'S A PLACEFOR ERUDITION IN SHOW BUSINESS
I mean,
SCRIPTS THAT ARE CLEVERLY WRITTEN
NOT LIKE THE MUSICALS FROM GREAT BRITAIN
I HAVEAGIFT
FOR WITTY DIALOGUE AND REPARTEE
SO I'VE BEEN HONING MY CRAFT
WHILE AWAITING A DRAFT
TO APPEAR INASHOWON BROADWAY
Nathalie
SPIRITUALITY
CAN THRIVE IN SHOW BUSINESS
FAMILY VALUES ARE A PLUS
FOR A BUS AND TRUCK TOUR
THE THEATRE'S A TEMPLE
OFART
EVERYONE'S PRAYING
"LORD, BRING ME A BIGGER PART"
Dull, Holofemes, Nathalie
PEOPLE LIKE US
WE WERE BORN TO BE IN SHOW BUSINESS
OUR CONCEPTION OF EDEN:
DOING A SPECTACULAR COLD READIN'
'SPITE OF OUR FRIENDS
AND OUR RELATIONS SAYING "NO, PLEASE, NO"
WE WON'T GET OUT OF THE RACE
WE'LL NEVER SLACKEN THE PACE
UNTIL WE'RE FINALLY CAST IN A SHOW
(as he enters)
Armado
All right, I'm here. We can now start the audition process.
Dull
Oh! I can do bird calls too!
11.2.3
Love Me, Love Me Not
Armado
-
What is this fool talking about.
Dull
I want to be in the show too!
Armado
If only you knew the hardships of the theatre as I do.
WHEN YOU'RE A PRO
YOU'RE FAMILIAR WITH THE CONS OF SHOW BUSINESS
AFTER A SEASON OF TOURING
OH, HOW I WISH FOR SOMETHING SAFE AND BORING
BUT WHEN I THINK
OF WHAT IT'S LIKE TO LABOR NINE TO FIVE
I ALWAYS TELL MYSELF "JERK.
CALL UP YOUR AGENT FOR WORK"
BECAUSE THE THEATRE'S THE ONLY PLACE I CAN SURVIVE
(Costard has entered during his singing and prepares to impress everyone with his
violin skills. Mote then enters thinking she is late for the audition and joins in with
Costard for a duet.)
(Arm ado is trying to start a set up for fenCing partners)
Holofemes
What on earth are you dOing?
Armado
Setting up appropriate partners for the fencing extravaganza. Leave it to the
professionals, please.
Holofemes
We are not having a fencing extravaganza! The gentlemen want to impress the ladies,
not look even more barbaric than they already do.
Nathalie
(attempting to keep the peace) It should be something more-I don't know ... theatrical.
"All the world's a stage and the men and women are merely the players."
Holofemes
Of course! I have been struck with brilliant inspiration! -As is quite customary for me.
Armado
I don't care if you get struck by lightening. If there is going to be a performance, a
fencing exhibition is imperative!
Holofernes
My dear fellow, you will not be disappointed. We wi" perform the best of William
Shakespeare. An evening of favorite scenes, filled with Elizabethan flair and
culminating in a hair-raising duel to the death!
11.2.4
Love Me, Love Me Not
Armado
_
Now you're talking! En guard!
(Everyone is now happy and content and being to sing)
A"
SUMMING IT UP
THERE IS NOTHING WE LIKE BUT SHOW BUSINESS
WHETHER IT'S SHAKESPEARE OR MAMET
NO OTHER CALLING HAS CALLED US, DAMMIT
WE'VE OFTEN TRIED
TO KICK THE HABIT BUT IT WON'T GO 'WAY
SO YOU CAN CALL US NUTS
BUT WE ARE STUCK IN OUR RUTS
AND WE'RE DETERMINED TO BE IN A PLAY!
.-
11.3.1
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
ACT TWO
Scene three
(The ballroom of the Moose Lodge. The guys enter, wearing costumes.)
Longaville
Where are they?
Dumaine
Maybe they didn't get the invitations.
Longaville
They are probably sitting in their tents right now making fun of those ridiculous gifts we
sent them.
Berowne
Hey, it's the best that gas station had to offer.
Henry
Shh, guys here they come.
(The girls enter, masked)
Ladies welcome. May I say that you a" look lovely tonight. We are so pleased that you
have decided to spend this evening in our company.
Regina
We found it impossible to refuse after the"heartfelt" letters and "charming" gifts that you
sent.
Dumaine
I knew that was a good idea.
Rosaline
What would you strangers with us?
Berowne
Nothing but peace and gentle visitation.
Rosaline
Why, that you have. And so begone.
Henry
Ladies, Professor Holofernes and the rest of the town have put a great deal of work
into this evening of entertainment. May we not at least have one dance?
Regina
As you can see, we are a" wearing the gifts you sent us, so you will get what you
deserve. Find the girl that matches your favor and we will have a dance!
11.3.2
Love Me, Love Me Not
"Behind the Mask"
Men
YOUR GLANCES SHOW ME
THAT MAYBE YOU KNOW ME
THEY GIVE ME STRENGTH ENOUGH TO ASK:
IS THERE A PARTNER
WHO'LL BE MINE FOR LIFE
IN THE GIRL BEHIND THE MASK?
Women
YOU ARE MISTAKEN
I'M ALREADY TAKEN
BUT IF YOU LIKE I'LL DANCE WITH YOU
THERE WILL BE ONE SHORT CHANCE
TO WIN MY HEART
IN THE DANCE, BEFORE IT'S THROUGH.
-
YES, I'LL BE YOUR PARTNER
THAT'S MY GUARANTEE
I IMPLORE, DON'T ASK FOR MORE
OR I MIGHT. .. AGREE
Men
SO WE'LL PRETEND
I'M ONLY A FRIEND
IF I WANT MORE, THEN THAT'S MY TASK
AND WHEN THE DANCE IS DONE
I'LL HOPE I'VE WON HER:
THE GIRL BEHIND THE MASK.
(Couples dance. Berowne and Regina -- disguised as Rosaline -- are dancing
together.)
Berowne
ARE YOU FOND OF BABIES?
Regina
Yes!
WHEN THEY'RE IN THE ZOO.
MY HEART ACHES FOR BABY SNAKES
DOESN'T YOURS?
Berowne
ME TOO!
11.3.3
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
(They dance off. Longaville is dancing with Katherine -- disguised as Maria.)
Longaville
DO YOU LIKE OUR COUNTRY?
Katherine
No!
FRANCE IS BEST FOR ME.
YANKEE BOYS ARE PUNY TOYS
TO US FRENCH, NON?
aui.
Longaville
(They dance off. Dumaine is dancing with Maria -- disguised as Katherine.)
Dumaine
ARE YOU FOND OF KISSES?
Maria
Yes!
ALSO MILKY WAYS
I COULD FEED MY LIPS ON CHOC'LATE CHIPS
FOR DAYS AND DAYS.
(Couples dance off. Jaquenetta and Armado come on and perform their ballet. They
exit as the other couples reenter.)
ALL
WHEN THE DANCE IS OVER
WHEN THE NIGHT IS GONE
WILL YOU BE MY LOVER THEN
IN THE COLD, GREY DAWN?
SO WE'LL PRETEND
I'M ONLY A FRIEND
THIS IS A DANCE THAT ENDS AT DAWN
BUT CAN WE TWO AGREE
YOU'LL STA Y WITH ME
AS TIME GOES ON?
--
11.4.1
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
ACT TWO
Scene four
(Outside the powder room at the Moose Lodge. The four girls have taken off their
masks.)
Regina
Are these the breed of wits so wondered at?
Rosaline
Healthy wits they have; fat and gross!
They were all in lamentable cases.
And did you hear that Henry is my love sworn?
Regina
And quick Berowne hath plighted faith to me.
Maria
Dumaine was at my service, and his sword.
"No point," quoth I. My servant straight was mute.
Katherine
Longaville said I came o'er his heart.
-
Regina
What are we going to do when we talk to them again?
Rosaline
We could a" wear sunglasses.
Maria
Or funny noses! Oh, too late -- here they come.
Henry
(to Regina)
Ladies, we were talking and we thought maybe you'd a" like to come back to our
place.
Regina
Sorry, but we are going back to our tents, so keep your promise.
"Nor God nor I delights in perjured men."
Henry
Huh? .. Listen, we know we were wrong about swearing to keep women off our
property. It was a stupid mistake and we're really sorry. So please, let's all go back to
our house.
Regina
Te" me, Henry, if we do go to your place, would I be sleeping in your bed?
.-
11.4.2
Love Me, Love Me Not
Henry
What?
Rosaline
Well, since we danced together so much this evening, and you swore that you did
"Hold me dear, as precious eyesight and did value me
Above this world;" adding thereto, moreover,
That you would "wed me, or else die my lover."
Regina
Well, isn't that sweet -- all my best to you two!
The honorable gentleman most honorably doth uphold his word.
Henry
What are you talking about? I swear I never made that oath to her!
Rosaline
Oh yes you did! And to show how serious you were about it, you gave me this.
(shows the jobby) But you can have it back.
Henry
I gave that to Regina! It had to be her, she had the jewel on her sleeve!
-
Regina
Pardon me, sir. This jewel did she wear.
Maria
(to Longaville) And apparently you can't tell the difference between Katherine and me!
Katherine
(to Dumaine) Yeah!
Longaville
(groping for an excuse) Yes, well .... um .... you two look a lot alike! (elbows Dumaine)
Dumaine
Uh-huh, sure, you have the same hair .... or .... eyes maybe?
Katherine
Right, I know, we're practically twins.
(Katherine and Maria look at each other, then back at the guys, then storm off.)
(Longaville and Dumaine rush off after them.)
Regina
And Berowne, I thank him, is my dear.
(to Berowne) What, will you have me, or your pearl again?
11.4.3
Love Me, Love Me Not
--
(She throws it at him and storms off.)
(Rosaline starts to exit, but is stopped by Berowne's response.)
Berowne
Neither of either. I remit both twain.
"Thus pour the stars down plagues"
BEROWNE
I SEE THE TRICK
I GET THE JOKE
THE WHOLE THING'S CLEAR TO ME NOW
YOU LET US WOO
THE LOT OF YOU
AND LAUGHED WHEN WE BROKE OUR VOW
AND AS WE SWORE ETERNAL LOVE
YOU SET US UP FOR A FALL
YOU LED US ON
BUT IN YOUR HEARTS
THERE WAS NO LOVE AT ALL
THUS POUR THE STARS DOWN PLAGUES FOR PERJURY
IT'S THE BITTER FRUIT OF VOWS WE COULD NOT KEEP
OH, LADY LOVE, YOU MADE A FOOL OF ME
AS YOU LED US THROUGH A DANCE
WHILE WE DREAMT OF TRUE ROMANCE
NOW THE DANCE IS DONE AND ALL I CAN DO IS WEEP!
ROSALINE
A TRICK YOU SAY
BUTINAWAY
YOU LET YOURSELVES BE DECEIVED
YOU HAD YOUR FUN
AND THEN WHEN DONE
YOU SAID THAT YOU'D BEEN AGGRIEVED
BUT IF YOU TRULY LOVED ME
YOU'D HAVE SEEN RIGHT THROUGH THE DISGUISE
BUT SURFACE GLITZ
CAN DIM THE WITS
OF EGOCENTRIC GUYS
DON'T BLAME THE STARS, JUST BLAME YOUR PERJURY
ALL YOUR PUFFED-UP WAYS ARE NOTHING BUT A LIE
YOU FOOLED YOURSELF, DON'T PUT THE BLAME ON ME
FIRST YOU SWEAR THAT STUPID OATH
.-
BEROWNE
WE RENOUNCED IT- THAT SHOWS GROWTH
11.4.4
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
ROSALINE
THEN YOU CHANGE YOUR LITTLE MIND
BEROWNE
JUST A MINUTE - THAT'S UNKIND
ROSALINE
THEN YOU SNAP YOUR FINGERS
BEROWNE
SNAP - WHO SAID?
ROSALINE
AND YOU EXPECT WE'LL JUMP
RIGHT INTO BED
BOTH
THIS IS SO UNREAL THAT ALL I CAN DO IS CRY!
ROSALINE
WHAT A QUAND'RY
BOTH
-
WHAT A MESS
BEROWNE
IS THERE NO WAY
BOTH
OUT OF THIS DISTRESS?
BEROWNE
I SOMETIMES THINK
ROSALINE
1'M GLAD YOU THINK
BEROWNE
IF MEN AND WOMEN COULD
COMMUNICATE
ROSALINE
EXPRESS THEMSELVES
BEROWNE
THE OUTCOME MIGHT BE GOOD
WE CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT EACH OTHER
-
ROSALINE
YOU SHOULD KNOW, YOU FELLOWS TRIED
11.4.5
Love Me, Love Me Not
BEROWNE
CAN'T YOU LET THAT GO?
ROSALINE
YOU'RE TOUCHY, NO?
BOTH
AGAIN MY BRAINS ARE FRIED
THUS POUR THE STARS DOWN PLAGUES FOR PERJURY
ROSALINE
THE APOLOGY'S TOO LlTILE AND TOO LATE
BOTH
SEEMS LIKE WE'LL NEVER BE IN HARMONY
ROSALINE
YOU PERSIST IN PLAYING GAMES
BEROWNE
YOU INSIST ON CALLING NAMES
ROSALINE
SUCH AS ARROGANT AND CRUDE
BEROWNE
NOW ADMIT IT- THAT WAS RUDE
ROSALINE
YOU HAVE NO IDEA
WHO lAM
BEROWNE
PM AFRAID THAT YOU DON'T
EITHER MNAM
BOTH
HOW DID I EVER THINK THAT
HEISHE WAS A POSSIBLE MATE?
-
11.5.1
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
ACT TWO
Scene five
(The ballroom of the Moose Lodge. The guys and girls reenter and are joined by
Costard.)
Costard:
Gentlemen, would you now like to see the scenes we've prepared?
Berowne:
Will they be good?
Costard:
Well. .. the scenes are vara fine, and well known. The actors, however ... well, will do
their best.
Berowne:
Go tell them to start the show.
(Costard nods to Holofernes)
Holofernes:
Cast, we're at places.
(We see Jaquenetta whispering to Costard.)
-
Henry:
This may not help us! After that silly masquerade stunt we pulled!
Berowne:
It wouldn't be bad to have something worse than what we've done.
Henry:
I said No! And that's final.
Princess:
No, Henry, let me overrule you now
That sport best pleases that doth least know how,
When great things labouring perish in their birth.
Berowne:
A right description of our sport, my friend.
Dumaine:
I agree!
Longaville:
Let the show begin.
(Enter actors)
Holofernes as Stage Manager
Good evening ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to our night of Shakespeare
scenes. All the world's. a stage, and all the men and women merely players. They
have their exits and their entrances ... Without hesitation I give you a pair of starcrossed lovers!
11.5.2
Love Me, Love Me Not
(He doesn't move .... Nathalie as Juliet enters)
Holofernes as Romeo:
But soft what light throughDumaine:
ROMEO AND JULIET!!! (to Longaville) You owe me five bucks.
Longaville:
Man.
Holofernes/Romeo:
May I continue?
Dumaine:
Yeah, go ahead.
HoloferneslRomeo:
But soft, what light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and Juliet the sun.
Arise fair sun and kill the envious moon-
-
Nathalie/Juliet:
Ay, me.
Holofernes/Romeo:
Not yet, my dear.
Nathalie/Juliet:
Sorry!
HoloferneslRomeo:
Arise fair sun, and kill the envious moon, (bird call by Dull) (hesitantly) who is already
sick and pale with grief that thou-Reverend, you're mouthing the words.
Nathalie/Juliet:
Sorry.
Holofernes/Romeo:
That thou, her maid, art far more fair than she. Be not her!
(enter Dull as Hamlet, very nervous)
Dull/Hamlet:
Um ... To be, or not to be ... That is the question, (getting in to it) whether 'tis nobler in
the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outragous fortune, or to take arms against a
sea of troubles, And, by opposing, end them.(Sees HoI. And Nat flirting on the side of
the stage)
GET THEE TO A NUNNERY!
11.5.3
Love Me, Love Me Not
Holofernes
Oh Dear!! NEXT SCENE PLEASE. .. Let's be prompt! We have an audience
remember?
-
Maria:
That's embarassing!
Katherine:
I don't get it. .. wait I think I Regina:
Don't think sweetheart. ..
Mote
Is it my turn? (seeing the audience) Oh, God.
Holofernes
Just breath in the good ... Exhale the bad ...
Mote
What's my motivation?
-
.
Holofernes
Remember the staged reading of Street Car Named Desire! Think ... BLANCHE.
(to the audience) I give you Lady Macbeth .
Mote/Lady Macbeth:
(southern) Out, Damn Spot! Get out of here! One, two, three. Why, then 'tis time to do
it now. HEELL is Murky. Fie, my lord, fie, a soldier, and afeard? What need we fear
who knows it, when none can call our power to account? I'll go take a bath, a nice hot
bath, that always makes me feel better. Can someone turn out that light? (Just walks
of the stage in a state)
Maria:
Wait.. .Was she supposed to-(Iooks at everyone) I know, shut up Maria!
(Walking to the stage Armado and Costard have this exchange)
Armado:
I do enjoy this little town. It will be hard to leave ... Armado's Magnificent Medieval Fair
has been requested in Springfield.
Costard:
And you're going?
Armado:
Of course! What's the matter?
-
Costard:
(wanting to lay into him) Nothing ... Lets just do the damn scene!!
(Armado and Costard come onstage.)
11.5.4
Love Me, Love Me Not
Holofernes:
-
Macbeth!
Armado as Macbeth:
I bear a charmed life, (they start to fake a sword fight) Which must not yield to one
woman.
Costard as Macduff:
{very upset)Despair thy charm, ya Jackass, and let the angel who thou still hast served
tell thee, Jaquenetta is Pregnant.
(They both stop ... look at each other.)
Katherine:
What was that?
Other Girls (Not hearing the pregnant part)
Shut up Maria!
(Armado and Costard really go at it)
Armado/Macbeth:
Accursed be that tongue that tells me this bull shit, for it hath cowed my better part of
man!
CostardlMacduff:
(to the audience) Here may you see the Jackass ... oh I mean Tyrant.
Armado/Macbeth:
Lay on Macduff, and damned be him that impregnates my love.
CostardlMacduff:
What was that?
All the Guys:
What was that?
All the Girls(except Katherine)
What was that?
Katherine:
I told you!!
Armado/Macbeth:
He has taken my girl from me.
-
Guys:
Don't just stand there! Kill him! .... (ad libs along these lines)
"Stop!"
JAQUENETTA (from the back of the house):
STOP!
-
11.5.5
Love Me, Love Me Not
PUT DOWN YOUR SWORDS
THINK OF OUR LOVE
ARMADO, PLEASE DON'T BE
OH, SO CRUEL
I'VE ALWAYS BEEN TRUE, LOVE
PLEASE, DON'T FIGHT THIS DUEL
ALL (EXCEPT ARMADO)
STOP!
HEAR HER ADVICE
TAKE IT TO HEART
ARMADO, DON'T BE A
DOWNRIGHT FOOL
SHE ONLY LOVES YOU SO
PLEASE, DON'T FIGHT THIS DUEL
JAQUENETTA
I BELIEVED IT WHEN YOU SAID YOU LOVED ME
WHEN YOU SAID THAT YOU CARED
I BELIEVED THAT YOU WERE A CHANGED MAN
AND WOULD GIVE ME YOUR ALL
ANDI HOPE AND I PRAY
YOU WON'T THROW IT ALLAWAY
ALL BECAUSE OF A STUPID, BARROOM BRAWL
ALL (EXCEPT ARMADO)
STOP!
DON'T BE AN ASS
JAQUENETTA
NOTHING IS GAINED
BY ACTING JUST LIKE A
STUBBORN MULE
ALL (EXCEPT ARMADO)
SHE'S TRULY A TREASURE
ARMADO
OKAY! I WON'T FIGHT THIS DUEL.
(phone rings and Holofernes answers it)
Holofernes:
Yes this is the Moose Lodge ... She is here ...... Regina, it's for you.
(Regina crosses to phone and takes it)
-
Regina:
(speaking on phone) yes?.... I'm coming home ... (she hangs up the phone.)
My father has passed away.
Berowne:
The scene begins to cloud. Players, away.
11.6.1
Love Me, Love Me Not
ACT TWO
Scene six
(Immediately thereafter)
Henry
Is there anything I can do?
Regina
We will be leaving tonight.
Henry
Well, then at least stay awhile and start fresh tomorrow. ("no" signal from Regina.)
You know I'd drop everything in a minute if it would help.
Regina
I thank you for all your kindness.
--
Berowne
At this time of grief, it's best to be straightforward. Your beauty, ladies, has changed
us. Our love for you made us renounce that stupid oath. We tried to let you know our
true feelings.
Rosaline
We read your letters, and took them for no more than pleasant jests.
Berowne
Our letters, madame, showed more than jest.
Dumaine
Katherine, will you have me?
Katherine
I do wish you a healthy, honest life, Dumaine ...
Dumaine
And shall I say "thank you, gentle wife?"
Longaville
What say you, Maria?
Maria
We are still young and must finish school.
11.6.2
Love Me, Love Me Not
-.
Henry
Now, at the latest minute, please grant us your love.
Regina
A time, methinks, too short to make a world-without-end bargain in. You have already
broken one oath. To prove that you can keep this one, spend a year on your own. Go
to a city, find a job, something meaningful. Meet people of all kinds, and think about
what you see. After living this life for one year, experiencing all you can, come find me.
And by this virgin palm kissing thine, I will be thine. If this thou do deny, let our hands
part, neither entitled in the other's heart.
"The Circle of Time"
ALTHOUGH CUPID IS BLIND, LOVE
TIME IS KIND LOVE
AND THE CIRCLE OF TIME
WILL SOON BRING YOU TO ME
WE'LL REMEMBER OUR VOW
AND THE TOUCH OF OUR HANDS WHEN THEY KISSED,
I WILL HEAR YOU DEAR VOICE IN THE CLOCK'S SWEET CHIME,
AND WHAT LOOKS LIKE A GLOVE
IS MY HEART AND MY SOUL, MY LOVE.
YOU WON'T TRAVEL ALONE ON THE CIRCLE OF TIME.
Katherine
ON THE CIRCLE OF TIME
WE'LL BE TWO TWINKLING STARS IN THE NIGHT.
THOUGH I WON'T SEE YOUR LIGHT
I'LL REMEMBER CLEARLY
HOW YOU SAID YOU WERE MINE, LOVE
WE'LL BE FINE, LOVE,
WHEN THE CIRCLE GOES 'ROUND
AND YOU END UP NEAR ME.
WE'VE NO FEAR OF THE NIGHT
IT WON'T SMOTHER OUR LIGHT -- WE'RE TOO STRONG.
LET THE WEAKER STARTS SET,
YOU AND I WILL CLIMB.
AND OUR LOVES WILL SHINE ON
TILL THE STARS DISAPPEAR IN DAWN
AND WE'RE HOME SAFE AND SOUND FROM THE CIRCLE OF TIME.
-
Maria
ON THE OCEAN OF TIME
THOUGH OUR TWO LITTLE BOATS DRIFT APART
I WILL KNOW IN MY HEART
YOU ARE SAILING NEAR ME.
IN THE DARK AND THE STORM, LOVE,
11.6.3
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
WE'LL BE WARM, LOVE,
AND I'LL SING TO THE STORM,
HOPING YOU WILL HEAR ME.
THOUGH THE OCEAN IS WIDE
I WILL COME TO YOUR SIDE BEFORE LONG
SO THE YEAR WILL RUSH BY
LIKE A QUICK, SWEET, RHYME
AND OUR LOVES WILL SAIL ON
TILL WE FIND WHEN THE WINTER'S GONE
WE ARE SAFE ON THE SHORE OF THE OCEAN OF TIME.
Berowne
Rosaline, will you be mine?
Rosaline
My dear Berowne, your arrogance and mocking tone are known to all. But these will
not win me. If you can find honesty and humility, then come and ask me your question
again.
Berowne
What do you mean? How do you go about finding honesty and humility?
-
Rosaline
I just mean, look outside yourself. Use some of your time to help others. I think we
both need to re-evaluate our priorities.
Berowne
If that is what it takes to win you, that is what I will do. The year will be a challenge, but
it won't be that long, knowing I will return to you.
Rosaline
IN THE DARKNESS OF TIME
WE'LL KEEP TWO LITTLE FLAMES BURNING BRIGHT.
THOUGH I WON'T HAVE YOUR GLOW
I WILL HOPE THAT, SOME DAY-TILL THE DAY YOU RETURN, LOVE,
MINE WILL BURN, LOVE -WHEN THE TIME IS ALL GONE
YOU WILL COME BACK SOME WAY ...
Regina
WE'VE NO FEAR OF THE NIGHT
Katherine
IT WON'T SMOTHER OUR LIGHT.
Maria
WE'RE TOO STRONG.
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
-
LET THE WEAKER STARS SET -All 4
YOU AND AND I WILL CLIMB
AND OUR FLAME WILL BURN ON
TILL THE SKY IS ABLAZE WITH DAWN
AND WE'RE HOME SAFE AND SOUND FROM THE CIRCLE OF TIME.
11.6.4
rJ' ~l,dJIA J" 'e. USttP
»Mr fT
11
- ~'e t>1'"o>J /l ~ftl +.
-....
fA4)
el
f,""~ _
\
::LSh()",1. hll'le.
~l
i()/~ hU' fJ....+
tf9
r
~+~ r f
bJ e.
.h.vl/J
1htrl
,~4) J' DO 0
~(. ktt~
rfvA,.IHo~
d Qj
MT
1 T'
It
Itt
CDf(I ()?'I
I
0
_
.ro:~~1~~ sf."t~f-<h\ f),~i
i's j tff I
tfrl
r,
II .,
-
\
•
J
a. (;if
-
-
call
f'.'''' -{;
l~lOUB IT'
lIu
er
rio
('
Now if ~ ., 1m f.-}
~)1
~ j
J:j
(Nt ~o~ t
0
+'1)tt-
_~ P1,
.-
{Ct.j' _
G~r'
-
w~n,
__
SVIf\ __
rnt,.
i: i)j I J 1 J I J, gJ I r 3 ~
"'/- //Moot
J4)
10
5vnt
\,~
1jifl~ ~s
§ ~tr
Ill)
a
,"0"·
0"
;~J -
I
~n. c~
1011]01. il
f~v
D0
-s~ J(
U
w~ ~J.(J(.)/d.I,A lie.. U.se~ +J.. e,)
I
r
Wt.!;.!~,~.~t.fJSfQ;t(.Jh~/t.fI..~ ~u ....
urn'f
I,
j J·
~I
0
M1
st:ll_
w,.~
\I
I
0
A(j~
f
11.7.1
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
ACT TWO
Scene seven
Berowne
I'm afraid this is not finishing up the way a comedy should, with a few weddings.
Dumaine
In a year from now there may be a happy ending.
Berowne
That's too long for a play.
Regina
And now, dear Henry, we have to be on our way.
Henry
We'll walk back with you, and help you load your car.
Maria
It's a beautiful evening.
Dumaine
You'll have good weather for your flight.
Katherine
Irs been too short.
(they all walk off together)
Guys
WE SHOULD HAVE USED THE TIME
I SHOULD HAVE TOLD HER THAT I LOVED HER STRAIGHT OUT
SIMPLE WORDS ARE ALL YOU NEED TO SAY
Girls
THERE ISN'T THAT MUCH TIME
TO UNDERSTAND WHAT ALL THE WORDS ARE ABOUT
SIMPLE WORDS EXPRESS THE THINGS THAT STAY
Armada
WORDS LIKE SUMMER NIGHT
Jaquenetta
WORDS LIKE MORNING LIGHT
Both
-
AND HEAD OVER HEELS IN LOVE
11.7.1
Love Me, Love Me Not
-
ACT TWO
Scene seven
Berowne
Our wooing doth not end like an old play;
Jack hath not Jill: these laides' courtesy
Might well have made our sport a comedy.
Henry
C9me sir, it wants a twelvemonth and a day,
And then 'twill end.
Berowne
That's too long for a play.
. Regina
Ay,sweet my lord; and so I take my leave
. Henry
No, madam, we will bring you on your way.
(they all walk off together)
Guys
WE SHOULD HAVE USED THE TIME
I SHOULD HAVE TOLD HER THAT I LOVED HER STRAIGHT OUT
SIMPLE WORDS ARE ALL YOU NEED TO SAY
Girls
THERE ISN'T THAT MUCH TIME
TO UNDERSTAND WHAT ALL THE WORDS ARE ABOUT
SIMPLE WORDS EXPRESS THE THINGS THAT STAY
Armado
WORDS LIKE SUMMER NIGHT
Jaquenetta
WORDS LIKE MORNING LIGHT
Both
AND HEAD OVER HEELS IN LOVE
Guys/Girls
WE SHOULD HAVE USED THE WORDS
WE SHOULD HAVE SUNG THEM WHILE THE SUN STILL WAS HIGH
NOW IT'S TIME TO SAY GOOD-BYE
Costard
Love Me, Love Me Not
---
11.7.2
Guys/Girls
WE SHOULD HAVE USED THE WORDS
WE SHOULD HAVE SUNG THEM WHILE THE SUN STILL WAS HIGH
NOW IT'S TIME TO SAY GOOD-BYE
Costard
IF THERE SHOULD COME A DAY
WHEN YOU ARE VISITING THIS TOWN ONCE AGAIN
LET ME KNOW
Mote
I'LL KEEP IN TOUCH WITH YOU
Nathalie/Holofernes
LET"S WALK A LITTLE WAY
TO WATCH THEM START UPON THEIR JOURNEY AND THEN
Nathalie
SEE ME HOME
Holofernes
I'D BE DELIGHTED TO.
All
THERE'S A STARRY SKY
Dull
THERE'S AN OWL NEARBY
All
YOU CAN HEAR HIS PLAINTIVE CALL
WE SHOULD HAVE HEARD THE SOUNDS
WE SHOULD HAVE FALLEN UNDER NATURE'S SWEET SPELL
NOW IT'S TIME TO SAY FAREWELL.
J
SUMMER'S ALMOST GONE
TIME KEEPS MOVING ON
YOU CAN ALMOST FEEL THE FALL
WE SHOULD HAVE USED THE TIME
WE SHOULD HAVE USED IT WHILE THE SUN STILL WAS HIGH
NOW IT'S TIME TO SAY GOOD-BYE
-
-
Miscellaneous
-
This project would not have been possible were it not for the generosity of the
Virginia B. Ball Center and Raphe Crystal's conception of this collaborative effort.
Although the seminar was labor intensive, it definitely had it's perks. We formed a close
bond with our classmates and have the satisfaction of knowing that we created a new
work of theatre from the ground up- Oh yeah, and a two week stint in New York with
most expenses paid wasn't too shabby either.
--
LOVE ME, LOVE ME NOT
Information on New York Trip
Travel
Monday, 4/9
10:30 AM Leave from the Music Building loading dock- University vans
1:40 PM Leave Indianapolis Airport via Continental
4:45 PM (Eastern Daylight Time) Arrive Newark Aiport
Travel via vans to Westside Y
6:00 PM (approXimately) Arrive Westside Y
Dinner at Y, move in, orientation.
Evening- walking tour of the surrounding neighborhood
Sunday 4/22
5:30 PM
Leave Westside Y via vans
7:50 PM
Leave Newark Airport via Continental
9:15 PM (EST) Arrive Indianapolis Airport
11 :30 PM (approximately) Arrive MusiC Building loading dock
Accomodations
We will be staying at the West Side YMCA, 5 West 63rd Street, New York, NY 10023
Phone 212-787-4100 Fax 212-875-1334
Accomodations are in double rooms with Men and Women Communal Bathrooms
Color television and air conditioning in each room
Housekeeping services (towels and linens provided, no washcloths)
Coin-operated laundry rooms
Message service at front desk
Cafe, located in the lobby, is open 6:30 AM-9:00 PM. Modestly priced.
Cooking appliances not permitted in rooms
Guests may use the Y's excellent gym, pools, weight rooms, jogging track, etc.
Bathing caps required at pool (they are on sale in the lobby)
Lockers in gym available for daily use (supply your own lock)
Work-out clothes required in gym
-
Theatre
We will be rehearsing and performing at the John Houseman Studio Theatre, 450
West 42nd Street, New York, NY 10036.
Phone 212-967-7079 Fax 212-268-5501
Located on 42nd Street between 9th and 10th A venues, it is easily reached by subway
or bus.
This small studio theatre, which seats 74, is often used for showcases of new plays, as
well as regular off-Broadway productions.
Upstairs is the larger John Houseman Theatre.
Located on "theatre row," the location of many off-Broadway theatres, the
HousemanTheatre Center is operated by Eric Krebs Theatrical Management.
Page 1 of2
Display News Item
Cards
Broadway
bound?
~Yd~
.~,
/
/.r
l
~
•
.
April
18
2001
Ball State Students Stage New Musical, Love
Me, Love Me Not, in NYC, April 18-21
TAKE OUR
Theatre and dance students from Ball State University in Indiana will be
showcased in a Manhattan staging of a new musical comedy, Love Me,
Love Me Not, based on Love's Labours Lost, April 18-21.
• J SURVEY
Chat Live Now!
Message Board
HOME
18-APR-2001
The company-written show, with music by Raphael Crystal (KuniLem! ) and lyrics by playwright Deloss Brown (Heart ofa Dog ), is the
result of an initiative meant to give students exposure to industry
professionals in the creation of a new musical. Brown also directs.
NDYS
ALL
US
Tony Awards
Canada
International
LISTINGS
Broadway
Off Broadway
Regional
Nat'J Tours
London
Summer Stock
PBOLMALL
Buy U.S. Tix
Buy London Tix
Travel Packages
Broadway Gift
Shop
Hotels
Restaurants
FEATURES
Feature Stories
Brief Encounter
Diva Talk
Steven Suskin
Love Me, Love Me Not will be seen at Off-Broadway's John Houseman
Theatre, 450 W. 42nd Street. Performances are at 8 PM April 18, 20 and
21, with a 2 PM matinee April 19. Admission is free but reservations are
strongly suggested. Call (212) 971-5880 to reserve seats.
The new tuner "gives a contemporary twist to Shakespeare's classic
comedy about four young men who decide to devote themselves to selfimprovement, free from all distractions including the company of
women," according to production notes. The book is a collaborative
effort by the entire company: Leanne Boarman, Nicholas Brenner, Chris
Bryant, Robb Coles, Bradford Coolidge, Elizabeth Davito, Natalie Ellis,
David Bryan Geary, Kellie Harrison, Carey Kayser, Lisa Liaromatis, Tiiu
Rebane, Kathleen Shawger, Adam Tilford and Jason Whicker.
The cast is made up of students from the Department of Theatre and
Dance at Ball State University, where Crystal teaches musical theatre.
The project is sponsored by the Virginia B. Ball Center for Creative
Inquiry.
In this adaptation, according to production notes, "Shakespearean verse
shares the stage with contemporary language and concepts. The action
has been moved to the mythical town of Eden, Indiana, where the young
men's retreat is disrupted by the arrival of four female French exchange
students. Other characters include the proprietor of a rather seedy
Medieval Fair, a lady sheriff, a pedantic community college professor and
assorted locals."
http://www.playbill.comlcgi-binlplb/news?cmd=show&code= 1030 13
04/18/2001
LOVE ME, LOVE ME NOT, a new musical comedy based on Shakespeare's Love's
Labour's Lost, will be showcased at the John Houseman Studio Theatre, 450 West
42nd Street, on Wednesay, April 18 through Saturday, April 21. Performances are at
8:00 PM on Wednesday, Friday and Saturday, with a 2:00 PM matinee on Thursday.
Admission is free but reservations are strongly suggested. Call 212-971-5880 to
reserve sea ts.
-
The musical gives a contemporary twist to Shakespeare's classic comedy about four
young men who decide to devote themselves to self-improvement, free from all
distractions including the company of women. The book is a collaborative effort by the
entire company. Music is by award-winning composer Raphael Crystal (Kuni-LemO
and lyrics are by critically acclaimed playwright Deloss Brown (Heart Of A Dog), who
is also the director.
The youthful cast is made up of students from the Department of Theatre and Dance at
Ball State University, where Mr. Crystal teaches musical theatre. The project is
sponsored by the Virginia B. Ball Center for Creative Inquiry, which underwrote this
unique experiment in which students collaborated with theatre professionals in the
creation of a new musical.
In this free-wheeling adaptation, Shakespearean verse shares the stage with
contemporary language and concepts. The action has been moved to the mythical
town of Eden, Indiana, where the young men's retreat is disrupted by the arrival of four
female French exchange students. Other characters include the proprietor of a rather
seedy Medieval Fair, a lady sheriff, a pedantic community college professor and
assorted locals.
Devotees of the Shakespeare play will recognize all of these characters from the
original, but they have been filtered through the consciousness of a group of twentyfirst century college students, and the result is energetic, lyrical and unpredictable.
Ball State University is the home of one of the nation's fastest-growing undergraduate
theatre and dance programs. In the past year alone recent graduates have appeared
on Broadway (Jesus Christ Superstar), in national tours (Chicago, Annie, Grease), on
prime-time television (Law and Order, West Wing, Boston Public) and in nationally
televised commercials.
This showcase production will introduce the public and the entertainment community
to a charming new musical comedy and to the students of a dynamic, young theatre
program.
-
£oue roe, £oue roe Not
Love Me, Love Me 9\{pt
-
zapJcfian
atlantis meaium
Love Me, Love Me Not
!:"~~;B:pe, Love Me Not
sombra
~
.Me, ~ .Me .N-l.d
dOdpt
love
.M.e~ love .iK.e Not
pellro bolll
J'Lobe
:me, J'Lobe :me jF!ot
oIb enghgb
/!,ove /JIle, /!,ove /JIle Not
h011 6e'loiihtl
cI2~ve
(/t1eJ
cI2~ve
(/t1e eN~t
IC.5.Mj
Love Me, Love Me Not
ingenius
Love Me, Love Me Not
trump mediaecal italic
/1Dve- 11k, /1Dve- 11k 11M Love Me, Love Me Not
codJ~
-
flourish
-
-
Ball State University
Vtrginia B. Ball Center for Creative Inquiry
Joe Trinuner, Director
College of Fine Arts
Department of Theatre and Dance
Don LaCasse, Chair
present
,/l/ze/ /;1
A neW" tnusical
cotne
based on
Shakespeare's Love's Labour's Lost
Book by the Entire Company
Music by Raphael Crystal
", < ) ...•
Lyrics by Deloss Brown, Raphael Crystal and Wm. Shakespeare
with
Leanne M. Boarman, Nick Brenner, Chris Bryant
Robb Coles, Brad Coolidge, Liz Davito
Natalie Ellis, Brian Geary, Kellie C. Harrison
Carey Kayser, Lisa Liaromatis, Tiiu Rebane
Katie Shawger, A. Michael Tilford, Jason Whicker
\ Set Design
Brad Coolidge
Costume Designtr
Katie Shawger
Lighting Design
MegganJ. Ratterman
Geoffrey Sherman
(
Production Manager .... /
Geoffrey Sherman
Choreograr;;;;.~
Nick Brenner
Stage Manager
MegganJ. Ratterman
Musical Di~;t~!Raphael Crystal
Press Representative
The Pete Sanders Group
Fight Choreolf'"apher
Project Consultant
Jason Whicker Stephanie Klapper C. S.A.
Directed by
Deloss Brown
John Houseman Studio Theatre
450 West 42nd Street
April 18, 20, 21 at 8:00; April 19 at 2:00
Logo Jamie Miles
Gra hies Brian Gear
-
Advertising Agreement for Ball State's
Love Me, Love Me Not!
Name of Business
--------------------Contact Person- - - - - - - - - -
Business Address _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __
City _ _ _ _ _ _ _, IN
Zip _ _ _ _ _ Business Phone _ _ _ _ __
Please check appropriate box. Sample sizes of each page appear on the back
SHOW AD for
April 27-28 at the Muncie Center for the Arts
D $100 Full Page Ad
D $75 Half Page Ad
D $50 Quarter Page Ad
'-~ $25 Eighth Page Ad
D -create ad from copy on back of this sheet or make
changes as indicated
D
-camera-ready ad enclosed (correct size and copy)
We greatly appreciate your support! Tax deductible donations can also be
made and will be listed in the program.
Donation:
Name (as it should appear in the program): ______________
,---:----
Advertiser's Receipt
Please make checks payable to: Ball Sate Theatre
Name of Business
Size ad purchased _ _ _ _-
Amount paid - - - - - Date - - - - - - - Check Number - - - - - - -
-
..d Deadline: April 6, 2001
-
We believe that through this project we grew in our understanding of the nuts and
bolts of musical theatre. We went where no fifteen other musical theatre students have
gone before and we hope this unprecedented venture will help to inform and inspire
others to collaborate on future endeavors.
-...