Chronicle The Fl University

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Volume XI, Issue 2
The offiu,I Oregon State University
Student Magazine
Spring 2006
College. Honors OSU the or
University State Oregon of policies or views the reflect
officially not may but staff, Chronicle the on writers
individual the of views reflect Articles students. OSU
and UHC by published is magazine Chronicle The
Hilt, Eric
Kalk; Katie
Wilson: Lea
Davidson John
Advisor Ity
Boss Van
Chronicle The
without strike often Sandstorms Cover:
grams pro
study-abroad State's Oregon through
expansion border for plug shameless A
Abroad! Study
graphers Photo
Boling' Emily
PauIsen Brittney
Varin' Jessica
dance can Engineers
that show to goes Center Engineering
Kelley the at atrium filled A
Ball Engineers The
Summers. Stephen
McFarland Annette
Kim, Frances
Baker: LeeAnn
Zaworski RJ
engineering and science,
math, than more about is School
Editor Layout
Life of Way a as English
opportunities internship and
abroad, study research, to guide Your
Summer of Most the Making
Mos-r Jenny
Chronicle The
a make to ability students' and ASOSU,
candidacy, her usses disc candidate
Vice-presidential ASOSU Former
Running Worth Race A
tick us make that things the and issue,
lost the guard, the of changing the On
Editors the From
Chronicle The
Spring 2006
Volume XI, Issue 1
The Lost Issue
The true story of love and deceit that made us lose this issue
page 4
It is said that some birds of prey use tests to choose their mates...
page 10
Art versus Science
A whimsical take on the age-old debate
page 10
The Ravin'
Ste phen Summers puts the 'Poe' back in 'Poet'
page 15
The Barren Exploit
A poem by Brittney Paulsen
page 15
The Pen as Mighty as the Microscope
Jenny Moser's honors thesis abstract
page 14
Spring 2006 Edition
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Goes: Time the Where Funny It's
Changing the Chronicle's Guard
Douglas Van Bossuyt
Editor-in-Chief -
0nce upon a time I was a
wet-behind-the-ears freshman
sitting in my room in McNary Hall
wondering how to get involved on
campus. I had been accepted to
the Honors College but still didn't
know much about it. On one of my
confused jaunts across campus I
A few years passed by and one day engineering/editor types are a rare
I decided it was time to submit breed indeed!
something to the Chronicle. After
I find myself coming full-
my first story came another and
another and another. Writing
for the Chronicle turned into an
addiction. I couldn't NOT write
for the Chronicle!
circle from a wide-eyed idealistic
freshman to a jaded super-duper
senior. Over the last several years
I've matured as a writer. I've found
my inner voice and have explored
One day, out of the blue, many interesting genres. Now
Jenny, the outgoing editor,
I've moved into the role of editor.
emailed me and asked if I'd like What's next? Who knows, but I
to take over at the helm of the can't wait to find out!
I look forward to serving
Chronicle. "Of course," I said,
Chronicle. The stories, cartoons,
the strong institution that is the
and photos caught my eye. The
happened upon a copy of the UHC
Chronicle in my new role as editor
quality of each individual piece I realize that the job of editor-inchief has been the almost exclusive and hope that you will join me in
captivated my mind. I thought to
carrying Jenny's legacy into the
myself,"Wow! I sure would like haunt of liberal arts majors, with
future. The Chronicle is nothing
to get involved and get a story a few science majors, like Jenny
without its contributors!
published in this neat magazine!"
Farewell to Thee, Old UHC
An Honors College Alum Reflects on her
experiences at Oregon State by Jenny Moser
"Life is what happens
I enjoyed writing too - I comprehensive edits to Bob
while you're making other always have - so when Abby Baddeley (former layout guy
Phillips recruited new writers at the extraordinaire) and was soon
John Lennon really had UHC welcome meeting, I decided offered the position of co-editorsomething there. Four years ago, I to join the staff of The Chronicle. in-chief for the following year,
had no idea what I'd be getting into Just for fun. Really. Dr. Mary along with Casey Woodworth.
My sophomore year started
at that UHC welcome meeting. In Burke, my microbiology advisor,
those first weeks of my freshman had told us that cultivating an
year, I was a microbiology major entirely unscientific extracurricular
to the core. The UHC application activity would only help us on our
that year required an essay in graduate school applications, after
which we wrote our obituaries as all.
Well, one movie review
we hoped they'd read sixty years
hence. As I recall, mine described and one UHC staff profile later,
my future Ph.D. in microbiology I coaxed Jane Siebler (former
and career as a research scientist. UHC Head Advisor and our
Future-Jenny cured cancer and led faculty advisor that year) to let
the commission to distribute the me copy edit the spring issue
prior to publication. I sent my
treatment worldwide, I believe.
with a bang. Jane and Bob were
off staff in one fell swoop: Eric
Hill and Jeff Burright took their
places alongside Casey and me.
As the brand-new senior staff
figured out how to coordinate and
motivate writers, plan the layout
and get a magazine together, I had
an incredibly stressful, yet also
incredibly exhilarating, term. I
Contin tied on Page 14...
Spring 2006 Edition
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A Race Worth Running
SpringASOSU campaign offers students a voice
by Annette McFarland
Who cares? That was the
In the past few years, ASOSU sometimes a financial resource for
sentiment expressed by a lot of has not been especially open or students with their own initiatives
students as I was campaigning for welcoming to students. To be and ideas.
ASOSU Vice President last spring. sustainable, the ASOSU officers have
They didn't think it mattered who got the mindset that they must find and
elected because, any way it went, their train replacements, which is good if
lives wouldn't be affected. As Nick you don't want your organization to
Graham and I were campaigning for die, but limits the amount of students
ASOSU President and Vice President, who actually run and/or apply for
we found that a lot of people didn't positions if they don't know how to,
In the course of running for
this position, I realized that I didn't
want to win anymore. There were
two main reasons that changed my
mind. First, I looked more closely
at the job description and realized it
didn't fit with what I wanted to do.
even know what ASOSU was or what or don't even know enough about The president and vice president are
it did for them.
the organization to be interested in more like supervisors supervising the
In the spring, Nick Graham getting involved with it to begin people who are actually doing things.
and I returned to OSU from our with.
study abroad (I went to France, he
went to Japan). We hit the ground people that
running and were instantly caught Nick and
up in campaigning for ASOSU Prez/ I
VPPres/VP. Wow. It was intense, to didn't
let me tell you. Nick and I were up know what
against three outstanding tickets, ASOSU
which was a big improvement from does for
the year before, when only one ticket Ii em
ran. Hey, wouldn't you rather beat besides
three tickets out, than, well, nobody? getting
I saw Nick and me as underdogs: our angry about
student leadership experience came something
largely from outside of ASOSU, every once
and we had both just returned from in awhile. In
studying abroad, which interfered my opinion,
Organizing events and programs and
with being active and visible on ASOSU has two responsibilities: to
actually doing things is more my cup
advocate for the students, which they
of tea. Secondly, I took a close look
Part of the reason I wanted seem to have a pretty good handle on,
at my opponents, (particularly Lauren
to run for this position was to prove and to be a resource for the students,
Smith and Joel Fischer), and thought
to people that I could. The elections which I think is an area that needs
that they would do a better job than
are open to all students (every single improvement. ASOSU needs to not
me. Do I regret running? Heck no! It
student on campus is a member only let students know what they're
was an experience in itself, regardless
of ASOSU), and so theoretically doing, but also ask the students what
of the outcome. I had a lot of fun, and
anyone with the drive, dedication, they want and need. Students should
learned a lot about ASOSU, Nick, the
and leadership experience should be feel comfortable bringing ideas for
student body, and most importantly:
able to walk onto the job and do a programs or issues to ASOSU and I
mysel P
great job, regardless of any ASOSU don't think they do. ASOSU should
Continued on Page 15...
experience they do or do not have.
be an administrative and, perhaps,
Spring 2006 Edition
12... Page on Continued
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Contributor- -
mers Sum J. phen Ste
Profit. Yes. Profit. and Fun for English
13. Page on Continued
explained, she classes," engineering
"With major. her of because summer
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close. up culture another seeing by
experiences her expand to wanted
she because abroad study to decided
She Mexico. Morelia, in history
Mexican and Spanish studying
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Beard, Hillary
Abroad: Study
classroom." the of
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summer last spent engineering, and here nearly is time Summer
civil in senior a Wall, Torn
Advisor UHC -
Baker LeeAnn
Opportunities Summertime
of out Most the Making
Dancing Down at the Engineers' Ball
Frances Kim
and pound out some Biot-Savart Law
calculations. When I did poke my
In winter term 2006, I was head out to see if the punch was filled
part of the team that put together the and that everything was running, I
first annual Engineering Ball hosted saw at the peak, nearly two hundred
by the Society of Women Engineers. people having a blast dancing to a
As with any enterprising venture, well-arranged playlist running off an
there was concern of having enough iPod. I couldn't help but participate
publicity, enough accommodation, in the dancing lesson that started off
enough people? Because engineers the ball. I learned enough to apply
are not inade fun of for being socially it between problems throughout the
adept, but instead are the butt of so night.
I'm such a nerd that I had
many of the jokes that hint engineers
have no fashion, no sex appeal, and never been to a single dance before
aren't so smooth, we were
thinking an engineering ball
might not be such a great
The first few days of
publicizing the ball didn't go
very well. One person was so
baffled that engineers would
even think to set up a ball she
mistook the ball posters as
posters for going Paint-Ba II-
partner! And it was surprising how
niany men in engineering do know
how to dance. I overheard in my
physics lab once that they learn to
dance because it is an excellent opportunity to meet women. The joke
ing! Tickets weren't selling,
Lea Wilson / Chronicie Staff
goes that engineering women are
and, as an engineer myself, I
all the good
was planning on bringing my physics the ball. Not to a high school dance, like parking spaces
By being
book to the ball to study. After all, the not to prom, not to any at OSU. In
spite of this, I had a lot of fun. As a forced to seek elsewhere for a partner,
ball was right before midterms!
Fortunately for the ball but woman in engineering, it was nice engineers might make another, more
that they can
unfortunately for me, on the big night to have so many intelligent men ask friendly, reputation
I was the only one to get into a corner me to dance. I was never short of a dance!
"Reading in the Amherst Library"
by Stephen J. Summers
On promises forgotten much too soon,
Of leaves that fell amid broke their spines somehow.
Who'd left as much of genius as they could
Behind, when slamming doors of broken wood
And rusted hinges, leaving us their sons.
But I don't see beyond a frosted moon
Reflected, gazing through the dark window
At me, and shelves of human lives now gone
Recorded less in language than in rune.
The farmer's child must bear the harvest now,
Supplanting elders who have since made good
Yet hope lies here iii this reflection wan,
For in this moonlit flice do they live on.
I gazed through stacks of thoughts from favored ones,
Spring 2006 Edition
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Spring 2006 Edition
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awe. and admiration
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8 page from Continued -
choice a really not English Studying Summers:
Baker: Research, Study Abroad Opportunities
- Continued from page 8
"the summer was the oiiiy time I felt
I could go and not get insanely far
behind." Some of the required classes
are sequences that taking a term out to
study abroad during the school year
wouldn't work.
"I really liked studying abroad"
said Hillary, "and would recommend
it to anyone who has the chance
to go." She went on to emphasize
that when studying abroad, it is
important to keep an open mind
about everything. "Some of the
food is strange," she shared about
of clubs and activities I'm extensively
involved in over the school year on
Drew Calhoun, a senior in top of all of my classes. Instead of
Biochemistry Biophysics, decided getting a summer job making money
to complete a research project last at a restaurant or grocery store for
summer for several reasons. During example, perhaps for even more
the school year, students learn science money, the research project served
(biology, chemistry, physics, etc.) as a viable source of income and
in the classroom, through lectures, gave me research experience that will
textbooks, largely from the findings serve extremely useful for me when
of others. Drew's research project applying for future internships and
offered him a chance to get the hands- possible careers."
Drew offered some advice to
on experience of actual research in
a true laboratory setting. "I would future students thinking of completing
highly recommend the research research over the summer: "The key
experience to everybody," explained to having a good experience working
Drew, "Whether planning a career on a project over the summer is to
in medicine, research in industry follow the directions and instruction
her experience, "and you have to be
open to that. In general though, you
just need to make sure that you don't
judge people on cultural things that or academia, or even something of the professor and all of your
may seem strange or unusual or even non-related, getting the research superiors in the lab and to develop
unfair. The culture is what it is, and in experience serves as valuable strong relationships with them. You
a lot of ways when studying abroad experience for later jobs and may will be needing their guidance and
you are going to observe, not try to help you decide whether or not you assistance throughout the summer, so
change things. So, the most important want to do research later on in life getting along with them, helping them
with their projects, and following
thing is to keep an open mind."
as well."
By studying abroad, Hillary
The summer was the most the normal procedures of the lab
was able to learn about the way logical choice for Drew because he you are working in is essential to
Mexican culture works. As she put already participates in a lot of things having a fun and rewarding research
it, "It was interesting being there to during the academic year: "I have a lot experience."
see how people in Mexico live. It
is very different in some ways, but
in a lot of ways also very familiar."
One of Hillary's most memorable
There are many resources on campus to help you find the
moments was trying to catch a bus
summer adventure that fits your goals. The OSU Career Services office
in Morelia right after a rainstorm:
has an internship coordinator who helps students locate appropriate
"The streets had turned into rivers so
internships. If you are interested, contact Adiy Clark at 737-0519 for an
I wore sandals and pulled my pants
appointment. If the study abroad program is what you are after, drop by
? Planning ahead for Summer
up above my knees and waded in the
streets with water almost to my knees.
Then trying to catch a combi (little
bus) without getting splashed and
drenched even more than I already
was was a lot of fun."
the International Education office at 444 Snell Hall or visit their website
at: http :// Finally, if you are interested
in tackling a research project or want to work in a research lab, you'll
want to watch for announcements like the Undergraduate Research
Innovation Scholarship Creativity (URISC) or Research Experiences
for Undergraduates (REU programs). In addition, your professors and
advisors can be helpful in finding an opening. Also, be sure to check
out any bulletin boards or clippings posted in your department office.
Spring 2006 Edition
Chronicle The
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2006. 22, May on presented Microbiology in Science of Baccalaureate Honors
Moser C. Jennifer
journalism. medical and science in issues Ethical
Microscope: the as Mighty as Pen The
Offered College Honors Moser:
Life for Lessons
Science, the of class newest and exhausted in watched and working,
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editor-in- the off concerns bouncing for UHC the leave to want didn't I
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UHC the editor-in-chieffor outgoing
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The Ravin'
by Stephen Summers
The Barren Exploit
by Brittney Paulsen
Smear on the shadow,
Black, blue and grey.
Put it on, skin tight.
Getting dressed to kill.
Hop in. and have no fear.
Down to drown some part of you.
Like a train careening down the slopes,
Going off, who knows where,
To nowhere to die.
Smear on the soap,
New, cold, and clean.
Scrubbing off and bleaching out.
Running away, flying to Never-land,
Looking down upon arrival,
To find it stuck with gum to your shoe.
An emptied glass was my companion sitting there in Jackson's Canyon,
As I studied faces blurring, darkened up against the door.
There came another to sit by me, looked me up-and-down quite finely,
Just as though I were some fine'ry from a rug-merchant's sales-floor.
"Tis a salesperson.' I muttered, 'selling something heretofore.
Only this and nothing more.'
I cannot always quite remember, but perhaps it was December
Coldly leaving grey November when I rested at this door.
Seeking peace from pressures many, finding solace were there any
To be found within this hovel, embers creeping 'cross the floor;
Sipping drinks I'd left my office, trying to forget Lenore,
Here comes this man to the fore.
Then he began, never stopping, speaking quickly with arms flopping,
Telling all he could of shopping for great bargains at his store.
This night only!' shouted to me this man who was talking shrewdly,
'This night only are the sales you can't afford to just ignore,
Miss this chance and you'll be sorry that there will not be a more
Honest price to bargain for.'
Smear on the paint,
Thick, sweet, and sickly,
Covering up a gaping hole
In the grand masterpiece of life.
An indiscretion, misdirection, tiny death,
Charcoal marks on the record of perfection.
'What precisely are you selling?' said Ito the salesman yelling;
Before I would begin shelling dollars from my pockets poor,
I should like to know for certain my investment was a sure thing,
Would not leave me lacking surety nor lead me to disaster.
For I needed no more bankers to make me their bonded debtor
Nor to throw me out their door.
Concluded on Pages 16-17...
McFarland: ASOSU is what students make of it
- Continued from page 7
Don't just complain about something: President! Anything is possible!
My advice? First, if you get in there and do something about
ever get an idea for a program, it! IfASOSU is going to change from
And the dirt on Mike and
Lindsey I know you're all waiting for?
event, speaker, or are just pissed the elite, closed-off, clique image Well, even though I was campaigning
off about something, go to ASOSU it currently gives off to something
with it! There are ten task forces to accessible and awesome for all
address student issues, and yours will students, it's going to take talented
probably fit iii perfectly with one of students to do it! Third, don't be
them. Second, check out ASOSU. I'd afraid to run or apply for a position in
recommend getting involved in the the elections next spring! You could
internship class (for anywhere from be a senator for your college in the
hard-core for Smith/Fischer in the
General Elections, I know Mike
Olson and Lindsey Johnson will
do a good job too! Lindsey and I
graduated from Rex Putnam High
School together and I've evenjumped
on her "trampy" in her front yard. And
1-3 credits) or one of the Task Forces Senate, a Task Force Director, or even that's about as scandalous as it gets!
(which all have weekly meetings). MUPC orASOSU President or Vice-
Spring 2006 Edition
Chronicle The
to tie-in the Granted. one. that on
France with par on exactly was ica
bells. bells, bells, bells, bells, the of crashing the and clanging the And
bells of horror the And
Amer- in coverage media the think
yore. of world the eulogized and be, to not Helen for love A
don't I who?"), ("Michelle to, talked
I've people the on based but time.
shore. the beneath far so sunk now sea the in city a And
eternally lost lovers Eulalie, and Ulalame Of
the at America in wasn't obviously
sore. fair heart my made thus he many verses and poems Uttered
I week. a about for France in papers
news- the of all in news front-page
Annabel of now Speaking
was she elected, was Bachelet
for. bargained had I that Tales
Michelle When abroad. studied
roar him
to consent than soundly quite sleep rather would Who
hadn't I if them of any about heard
snore, to begin fain would who me about here patrons Eyeing
have wouldn't I Well, abroad? ing
proudly, verses reciting now loudly, speaking started he Then
study- with do to have women lous
more. say would he what wondering talesman the to sherry Giving
fabu- these of all do What
alesman the from ordered I quick salesman, this by Fascinated
presidential potential other all than
higher ranking polls, the leading
moor.' Spanish the from Something
was she January, in is, thing The
to me warm to as tasty
it make Though
store, my tap to prepare and steady to drink me buy Simply
candidate. party's her as chosen if
2007, in presidency the for running
ready, you're tales these for if but he, said surely,' sir, this, of None
for?' locked-up be could I that calumny vile new some Manage
in interested she's that announced
has who France in party Socialist
free? task a do I'd wish you Do me? ask you do what exchange in SAnd
the of member a is Royale Segolene
for.' bargain you This said, He
and Africa, in country a Liberia, of
president the is Sirleaf Johnson len
bore.' but anything do yet wander always which poems with And
gore, unmitigated and glories loathsome concerning All
El- here! century 21st the It's gram.
pro- the with get to America for
forays dreadful countless with filled stories head my in hold I For
time about it's but bad, that's know,
lore. old my on chance a take not dares who editor the Than
more cares who anyone to sale for wares peddle to here am
I office. into woman any almost
vote I'd 2008, in Rice Condaleeza
Ravin' The
versus Clinton Hillary to down
comes it if Even president? woman
our where's years... 230 on going
Page... Next on Continued
of outside on going what's about
enough care don't media American for democracy a been has America
president. woman a get they and
and Americans that is point My
Americans. us even anyone, for years, 16 only for democracy a been
stuff interesting that's But victory. has Chile Chile. of president elected
recently the is Bachelet Michelle
her in Bachelet support to Chile to
over flew ale Roy when French the
few. proud the of one as yourself
count do, they If you? to anything
for interesting also was It French.
mean names these of any Do
the to relevant more tad a story the
Royale. Segolene irleaf. S Johnson
made France. of president woman
Ellen Bachelet. Michelle
future possible Royale, Segolene
I there while and months
5 for France to went I
yourself. for it experience and there
out go actually to is thought), all we
as 'bad' or 'big' as nearly isn't out,
turns it as world, (the world bad big
that in out on going what's about
learn to going ever you're way only
The troops). our or oil, our us, fects
af- directly it (unless borders, our
McFarland Annette by
abroad study to Why
McFarland: A Shameless Plug to Study Abroad
- Continued from page 16
grad in exactly 12 terms anymore
"But Annette, it's too expensive!" Okay, think about this: when
else in your life are you going to
have the opportunity to live in another country for a few months to a
year, while you 'study'? Seriously.
I tell people that studying abroad
was the best thing I've done for myself in my life thus far. And it's true.
I had awesome experiences, met
amazing people, became proficient
in a second language, and learned
a lot more. Plus the classes weren't
too terribly challenging over there
The End of The Ravin'
either! It's totally worth taking out
loans or tapping the parents or doing whatever you have to do to get
But glass refilled his mood did change and stories of an angel strange
yourself over there!
Replaced the dour poems that he'd begun. This creation oddly bore
And if all else fails, take
Resemblance to an Imp perverse and to bedeviled heads reversed.
advantage of the international
But he soon left these topics light and told of tales with darker core,
here on campus. You
Money stolen, secrets broken, murders near the shrouded morgue.
may not be able to go to Saudi
Yet my friend had stories more.
Arabia or Japan, India or Malawi
but, wouldn't you know it, we
Now his voice rose somewhat higher telling then Ligeia's pyre
have exchange students on campus
And the madness-induced fire burning up in poor Usher.
from all of these places! And as a
Red Death masques all persons killing rich and poor all houses filling.
former exchange student myself,
And accounts of nature chilling, willing to inflict torture
I know how much it means to
Or to kill an eye insanely and confess to hush the roar
be welcomed and valued by the
Of a heart which beats no more.
domestic students. An easy way
to get involved with international
Here I looked and saw the empty bar, light fading like the evening star,
students is through the English
Come with me, sir, it isn't far outside to my own chamber door.'
Language Institute. They're always
I had drunk but very little while my friend was all a-tipple
looking for conversation partners
And I offered him a vintage which he could not just ignore.
for their students, and everyone
"Montillado, sir?' he asked me, stumbling quickly to the door,
(even people as crazy busy as me),
Bring me to it, I implore!'
has one hour a week to spare! Also
Walking toward, he thought, my homestead, we instead to catacombs head just keep your eyes peeled in the
Barometer and on bulletin boards
He continued waxing onward on his stories all the more.
around campus for meetings and
I said to him, 'No use fighting, no one would have bought your writing,'
events of an international nature.
As I chained him, eyes a-lighting on the bricks denying him succor.
They're going on all the time!
Thank you for these pieces plenty, that will pluck me from the poor,
Though, please, call me Montresor.'
own country because of the travelto visit Germany, The Nethering I did. I never could have gotten
lands, Belgium, Italy, England,
these experiences from books or
and Scotland. I met people from
the news from within America's
those countries as well as people
from Canada, New Zealand, AusSo, study abroad!
tria, Spain. Portugal, Japan, China,
"But Annette, I cant! I'm an
South Korea, Istanbul. Kansas,
engineer/hard core science/some
Connecticut, Pennsylvania, North
other hard major with sequence
Carolina, Poland, Brazil, Argentina, classes!" Anything's possible, my
Peru, Mexico, and more! I was so
friends! There are many programs
lucky and blessed to have gotten
that take only one or two terms,
these opportunities, and I learned
and don't forget summer programs!
so much about the world and my
And who's finishing their under-
Spring 2006 Edition '7
ecommended Reading
from Honors Students
Michael Crichton, The Lost World
Ian Stewart, Flatterland: Like Flatland, Only
More So
Michael Crichton, Jurassic Park
Malcom McDowell, Blink
'-Max Brugger
James Gurney, Dinotopia
William Joyce, Dinosaur Bob
Dr. John Long, Dinosaurs of Australia and
New Zealand, and other animals of the
Mesozoic Era
ChronicIe Staff
Haruki Murakami, Kafka On The Shore
Stephen King, The Gunslinger
'-Nick Meredith
Theodore Geisel, The Lorax
--'Tim Karplus
Daniel Quinn, lshmael
Ed Viesters, No Shortcuts to the Top
-'Tim Sorg
Eric Hansen, Motoring with Mohammed:
Journeys to Yemen and the Red Sea
--'Douglas Van Bossuyt
Afin: The Chronicle
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