Note that student work varies significantly from one assignment to the next, even within the
same mark range. The intent of providing samples such as this one is to guide students in
recognizing key criteria of assignments and in assessing their own work.
SAMPLE ARGUMENT – SATISFACTORY
Essay question: Examine the causes and effects of prejudicial attitudes and beliefs in the
novel, To Kill a Mockingbird.
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Strengths:
• The structure of an argumentative paragraph is present (knowledge).
• The argument is focused on the topic of prejudice throughout (thinking).
• Sentences are grammatically correct (communication).
Tips for improvement:
• A complete expansion is needed. Outline both examples (knowledge).
• When beginning explanation, avoid stating “this quotation shows/proves/ reveals”;
focus on the action or what the character/narrator demonstrates (thinking).
• Add more depth to explanations of quotations, discussing specific words or phrases
used in the quotation. What do Jem and Atticus value that underpins their statements?
(thinking)
• See comments for the satisfactory introduction. Part of the problem here is that the
thesis is not argumentative, so this argument is rather factual and undeveloped
(thinking).
• Lead in to quotations with short clauses, such as "He says," before quoting a passage
(communication).
• Include a transition to help the switch from the first to second example
(communication).
• Avoid contractions, such as "aren't", in formal writing (communication).
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Jem and Atticus clearly show gender prejudice. Gender prejudice occurs when people
judge others based solely on their sex. Although only 11 years old, Jem Finch has already
adopted society's attitudes and beliefs about the opposite sex. "I declare to the Lord you're
getting more like a girl every day!" (52) This quotation shows that Jem is sexist because he
insults Scout. Surprisingly, Atticus blurts out a sexist remark while explaining to Scout that
women aren't allowed on juries. ''I doubt we'd ever get a complete case tried – the ladies'd be
interrupting to ask questions" (221). This quotation reveals that Atticus is prejudiced against
women. Therefore, the attitudes of Jem and Atticus show gender prejudice.
Work Cited
Lee, Harper. To Kill a Mockingbird. New York City: Warner Books Inc., 1982. Print.