above
beneath
People are like icebergs!
What’s seen on the outside:
15% - 10% (appearance)
What’s really happening
on the inside:
85% - 90% (emotions)
JESUS & E.Q.
A Biblical and Pastoral study
Part 1
Rolan Monje, DpTh, MMin
Pwede po ma-download ito at iba
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w/ links from the MMCC website
www.mmcconline.org
How’s your EQ?
• EQ = emotional quotient; index of
emotional intelligence
• Popularized by Daniel Coleman in his
book “Emotional Intelligence: Why it
can matter more than IQ”
• The range of emotions that humans
have is unique; (it makes us human)
Made in God’s image (Gen 1.27)
• (MKJV) And God created man in His image;
in the image of God He created him. He
created them male and female.
• (TAB) At nilalang ng Dios ang tao ayon sa
kaniyang sariling larawan, ayon sa larawan
ng Dios siya nilalang; nilalang niya sila na
lalake at babae.
Spheres of being human
As seen in Jesus
• Spiritual
• Physical
• Social
• Emotional
The phenomenon in the church
• Over emphasis on the spiritual sphere
• Neglect of the other spheres/aspects
of humanity
• Wrong idea (from wrong theology)
that to be ‘spiritual’ means suppressing
the other aspects
In Asia especially…
• Perhaps the most neglected and
misunderstood sphere is that of
emotions.
• We can think its just ‘being Pinoy’
• We can assume that some Christians
are emotionally mature just because
they are ‘spiritual.’
• We cannot grow to spiritual maturity
unless we grow emotionally.
Looking inward
Dag Hammarskjold, former Secretary
General of the U.N.:
“The longest journey of any person is
the journey inward”
#1 Jesus had the highest EQ
• Jesus had the full range of human
emotions
• Jesus took responsibility for his feelings
• Jesus did not suppress his feelings
• Jesus did not project his feelings onto
others
#1 Jesus had the highest EQ
(some emotional experiences)
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Jesus was deeply disturbed in Spirit (Jn 11)
He wept over Lazarus (Jn 11)
He wept over Jerusalem (Lk 19)
He was angry with his disciples (Mk 10)
He was furious at temple commercialism (Jn 2)
He showed astonishment (Mt 8)
He had an emotional longing for friends (Lk 22)
He showed compassion for widows, lepers, and
blind men (Mt 20, Mk 1, Lk 7)
Jesus’ awareness
Jesus knew that the Father had put all
things under his power, and that he
had come from God and was
returning to God – Jn 13.3
#2 Jesus made people assess
their motivations
• Jesus wanted people to work on their
insides, before minding the outside
(Mt 6, Mt 23)
• Jesus pointed people to ‘why’
questions (Lk 6, Jn 4)
Matthew’s list of ‘why’ questions
• MT 6:28 "And why do you worry about clothes?
• MT 7:3 "Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in
your brother's eye…
• MT 8:26 …why are you so afraid?" Then he got up
and rebuked the winds…
• MT 9:4 Knowing their thoughts, Jesus said, "Why do
you entertain evil thoughts…
• MT 15:3 Jesus replied, "And why do you break the
command of God…
• MT 19:17 "Why do you ask me about what is good?“
• MT 26:10 Aware of this, Jesus said to them, "Why are
you bothering this woman?
Practical challenges
#1 Do not hide or deny your
feelings
• Be honest in your times with God
• Beware of the tendency of churches
– You are more spiritual if you don’t feel
– “Kaya ko pa ‘to” attitude
– “Dapat ‘di nila ako makitang mahina”
• Build a support group around you
We can’t run from feelings
Being honest can be difficult
#2 Ask the ‘why’ questions
• Why do I do what I do?
• Why am I a Christian today?
• Why do I protect my faith?
• Why am I here?
#2 Ask the tough ‘why’ questions
• Why do I want to have a successful
ministry?
• Why do I want to lead?
• Why is it that I am always late for
meetings, and for church?
• Bakit ako hyper-sensitive (balatsibuyas) sa comments ng iba?
• Why am I avoiding a certain person?
#2 Ask the tough ‘why’ questions
• Why do I have a hard time confronting
people at church?
• Why do I hesitate to share my faith?
• Bakit ako critical sa taong ito?
• Why can’t I open this up to my spouse?
• Bakit ako hindi seryoso sa commitment?
• Why am I attracted to this sin?
Asking the ‘why’ questions
• Provides you a starting point for
repentance
• Helps point you to Scripture
• Gives hope to move forward!
#3 Avoid pre-judging people
• Stereo-types
• Self-projection
• Sweeping generalizations
Part 2: Steps and structures for emotional health
‘Starting clean’ with people
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Helps protect our heart
Prevents unnecessary stress
Promotes grace and peace
Builds harmony in the church
[Part 2: Steps and structures
for emotional health
Let’s have a Jesus ministry!
Let’s build an emotionally
healthy church!
JESUS & E.Q.
A Biblical and Pastoral study