Argument Essay
Who is admirable?
• Who is worth admiring in The Crucible?
• Why?
1. Talk with a partner.
2. Tell me your answer.
3. Back up your answer with evidence.
(7 Minutes)
• Example: Proctor is admirable because he was willing to die for his
beliefs.
• Socratic Seminar
• Who is worth admiring in The Crucible?
• Why?
1. Talk with a partner.
2. Tell me your answer.
3. Back up your answer with evidence.
(7 Minutes)
• What are your first steps in starting an essay?
Now
• Hamburger/Hamburger paper.
Now
• Get into your groups.
• Choose two post-it notes that show your
character is admirable.
• Choose one post-it note showing your
character is NOT admirable.
Hamburger Hamburger Paper
ADMIRABLE QUOTE
Quote 1
(pg. #)
ADMIRABLE QUOTE
Quote 2
(pg. #)
NOT ADMIRABLE
Quote 3
(pg. #)
Revi
Hamburger Hamburger Paper
ADMIRABLE QUOTE
Quote 1
(pg. #)
NOT ADMIRABLE
Quote 3
(pg. #)
ADMIRABLE QUOTE
Quote 2
(pg. #)
Thesis: In the (TEXT) play (TITLE) The
Crucible, by (AUTHOR) Henry Miller, Abigail
Williams is an admirable character whose
resourcefulness and ambition are heroic.
Revi
Write on center diamond:
1. Driving Question for Thesis: Which character in
The Crucible is admirable and why?
2. USE YOUR “KEY WORDS FOR THE CRUCIBLE”
IN YOUR THESIS.
3. Answer with FATT.
Example: In the (TEXT) play (TITLE) The Crucible, by
(AUTHOR) Arthur Miller, Abigail Williams is an
admirable character whose resourcefulness and
ambition are heroic.
Hamburger/Hamburger
1. Say-Mean-Matter Quotes 1 and 2.
2. Leave Quote 3 (quote that goes against your thesis)
alone.
Hamburger Hotdog Paper
Writer’s Name: Tommy Kim
Quote #1
Quote #2
Say: ABIGAIL. I have been hurt, Mr. Danforth; I
have seen my blood runnin’ out! I have been near to
murdered every day because I done my duty pointing
out the Devil’s people—and this is my reward? To be
mistrusted, denied, questioned like a—
DANFORTH, weakening. Child, I do not mistrust you
ABIGAIL, looking about in the air, clasping her arms
about her as though cold. I—I know not. A wind, a
cold wind, has come. (101)
Say:ABIGAIL. She is blackening my name in the
village! She is telling lies about me! She is a cold,
sniveling woman, and you bend to her! Let her turn
you like a—PROCTOR. Do you look for whippin’?
(22)
MEAN: This passage illustrates just how far
Williams uses any means necessary to win
Proctor’s love, even questioning his manhood.
MEAN: Abigail argues that she is the virtuous one,
that she is suffering because she is aiding the court,
MATTER: As a result, her ambition inspires her
turning in those who were acting suspicious
to try new methods to be romantically involved
MATTER: In this case, her denouncement
of
the
In the play The Crucible, by Arthur
Abigail never quitting, using her
withMiller,
Proctor,
Williams
is
an
admirable
character
whose
court reveals her admirable ambition to beat the
to use every possible way to
resourcefulness and ambitionresourcefulness
are heroic.
unfair judicial system, and by simply
pointing at the
achieve her goal of Proctor.
paranoia in the air, not creating it, she confirms what
the judges already believe—that evil has invaded the
town and is clouding their judgment.
Quote #3 (Counterargument)
Say: ABIGAIL. No, he’ll be comin’ up. Listen,
now; if they be questioning us,
tell them we danced—I told him as much
Thesis: Gatsby is admirable.
Quote #1
•Say: ABIGAIL. I have been hurt, Mr. Danforth; I have seen my blood runnin’
• out! I have been near to murdered every day because I done my duty
• pointing out the Devil’s people—and this is my reward? To be
• mistrusted, denied, questioned like a—
•DANFORTH, weakening. Child, I do not mistrust you—
•ABIGAIL, looking about in the air, clasping her arms about her as
• though cold. I—I know not. A wind, a cold wind, has come. (101)
Mean (What does the quote “mean”? Summarize):
Abigail argues that she is the virtuous one, that she is suffering
because she is aiding the court, turning in those who were
acting suspicious.
MATTER (How does this matter to the thesis?):
In this case, her denouncement of the court reveals her
admirable ambition to beat the unfair judicial system, and by
simply pointing at the paranoia in the air, not creating it, she
confirms what the judges already believe—that evil has invaded
the town and is clouding their judgment.
Thesis: Abigail is admirable.
Quote #2
•Say: ABIGAIL. She is blackening my name in the village! She is telling lies
• about me! She is a cold, sniveling woman, and you bend to her! Let her
• turn you like a—
•PROCTOR. Do you look for whippin’? (22)
Mean (What does the quote “mean”? Summarize):
This passage illustrates just how far Williams uses any
means necessary to win Proctor’s love, even
questioning his manhood.
MATTER (How does this matter to the thesis?):
As a result, her ambition inspires her to try new
methods to be romantically involved with Proctor,
never quitting, using her resourcefulness to use every
possible way to achieve her goal of Proctor.
The Counterargument
“I know you are, but what am I?”
Evidence: The Counterargument
What do you know about a “counterargument?”
•It’s difficult
•Evidence goes AGAINST your thesis
•Opposite of what the person is arguing
•Use facts
•Something that proves a point wrong
•Rebuttal
Evidence: The Counterargument
Your parents tell you, “your curfew is set for
10pm. The Van Nuys police website shows that
crime is mostly committed between the times of
10pm-2am.”
Talk to a partner and explain how you can give a
counterargument.
1 minute.
Evidence: The Counterargument
Your parents tell you, “you cannot go to
Alejandro’s party. He was arrested in middle
school for bringing matches and dirty underwear
to school.”
Talk to a partner and explain how you can give a
counterargument.
1 Minute
Evidence: The Counterargument
Your parents tell you, “downtown Los Angeles is
too far. You can’t go there without an adult.”
Talk to a partner and explain how you can give a
counterargument.
1 Minute
Evidence: The Counterargument
Thesis
Contradicting Evidence
Counter-argument on how evidence
Is NOT valid.
Evidence: The Counterargument
Thesis
Contradicting Evidence
Use THE UNTOLD to show how contradicting
evidence still proves thesis.
Evidence: The Counterargument
Thesis: Pitbulls are one of the friendliest breeds and the ban in
Denver should be overturned.
Contradicting Evidence: Pitbulls have the highest rate of
attacks on humans.
• The untold: THE OWNERS!
Evidence: The Counterargument
Thesis: Pitbulls are one of the friendliest breeds and the ban in
Denver should be overturned.
Contradicting Evidence: Pitbulls have the highest rate of
attacks on humans.
Counter-argument on how evidence is NOT valid:
This breed of dog attracts owners who are criminals who raise
the dogs to fight, training them to have violent tendencies. Like
children, mean and violent owners will translate to mean and
violent dogs, and most other breeds have owners who want to
raise their dogs properly. It’s not the dog breed that is violent
but the type of owner who raise them.
Evidence: The Counterargument
Thesis: All types of guns should be legal.
Contradicting Evidence: The Sandy Hook shootings left
dozens of children dead.
Counter-argument on how evidence is NOT valid:
Work with a partner and come up with why this
contradicting evidence can be WRONG. I will give you 3
minutes.
Evidence: The Counterargument
Thesis: All types of guns should be legal.
Contradicting Evidence: The Sandy Hook shootings left
dozens of children dead.
Counter-argument on how evidence is NOT valid:
THE UNTOLD: Mental Illness!
Evidence: The Counterargument
Thesis: We should encourage the use of capital punishment in
all states.
Contradicting Evidence: Texas has the most executions out
of all states, but the murder rate is also the highest.
Counter-argument on how evidence is NOT valid:
Work with a partner and come up with why this
contradicting evidence can be WRONG (hint, use 3rd
variable, low income, low graduation rates, etc. of TX). I will
give you 3 minutes.
Evidence: The Counterargument
Thesis: We should encourage the use of capital punishment in
all states.
Contradicting Evidence: Texas has the most executions out
of all states, but the murder rate is also the highest.
• THE UNTOLD: Income (low)
Evidence: The Counterargument
Thesis: College athletes should get paid for playing.
Contradicting Evidence: In Slovania, where college players
get paid, they have the highest dropout rate in the world.
Counter-argument on how evidence is NOT valid:
Unmentioned variable: Slovania’s average income is lowest
in the European Union.
Evidence: The Counterargument
Thesis: We should encourage the use of capital punishment in
all states.
Contradicting Evidence: Texas has the most executions out
of all states, but the murder rate is also the highest.
Counter-argument on how evidence is NOT valid:
Work with a partner and come up with why this
contradicting evidence can be WRONG (hint, use low
income, low graduation rates, etc. of TX). I will give you 3
minutes.
Evidence: The Counterargument
Thesis: The Lakers are the best team in basketball this season.
Contradicting Evidence: The Lakers have the worst record
in the league.
Counter-argument using THE UNTOLD on how evidence is
NOT valid:
Work with a partner and come up with why this
contradicting evidence can be WRONG. I will give you 3
minutes.
Evidence: The Counterargument
Thesis: Birmingham Students are the most kind students in all
of the valley.
Contradicting Evidence: Birmingham has the highest rate
of fights.
Counter-argument on how evidence is NOT valid:
Work with a partner and come up with why this
contradicting evidence can be WRONG. I will give you 3
minutes.
Thesis: Gatsby is admirable.
In the play The Crucible, by Arthur Miller, Abigail
Williams is an admirable character whose
resourcefulness and ambition are heroic.
Say: ABIGAIL. No, he’ll be comin’ up. Listen, now; if they be questioning us,
tell them we danced—I told him as much already. (18)
Mean (What does the quote “mean”? Summarize):
This passage reveals how Williams can masterfully arrange plans so that all
the girls involved with the original ritual have the same account of the
incident.
MATTER (How does this matter to the thesis?):
Ultimately, Abigail Williams ambitiously arranges the proper stories to tell
using her resourceful mind. Although this may be immoral to some who are
obsessive with rules, in the end Williams allows her friends and herself a way
to escape the (THE UNTOLD) cruel punishments given out during that time,
punishment that included stone presses, hangings, and drowning. The pure
ambition to survive allowed Williams to survive the ruthless persecution of
that era.
Thesis: Proctor is admirable.
In the play The Crucible, by Arthur Miller, John Proctor is an
admirable character because of his genuine morals.
Say:
“You are pulling heaven down and raising up a whore!”
Mean (Who, What, Where):
John Proctor argues that Abigail is a harlot, and that the court is
bringing a bad name to heaven because of the lies being told
and believed.
MATTER (How does this matter to the thesis?):
In this case, ALTHOUGH Proctor committed adultery, he is still
admirable because he is adhering to his genuine morals by not
lying to the court. He is sacrificing his life by telling the truth and
upholding his morals, all for the love of his wife.
Hamburger Hotdog Paper
Writer’s Name: Tommy Kim
Quote #1
Quote #2
Say: ABIGAIL. I have been hurt, Mr. Danforth; I
have seen my blood runnin’ out! I have been near to
murdered every day because I done my duty pointing
out the Devil’s people—and this is my reward? To be
mistrusted, denied, questioned like a—
DANFORTH, weakening. Child, I do not mistrust you
ABIGAIL, looking about in the air, clasping her arms
about her as though cold. I—I know not. A wind, a
cold wind, has come. (101)
Say:ABIGAIL. She is blackening my name in the
village! She is telling lies about me! She is a cold,
sniveling woman, and you bend to her! Let her turn
you like a—PROCTOR. Do you look for whippin’?
(22)
MEAN: This passage illustrates just how far
Williams uses any means necessary to win
Proctor’s love, even questioning his manhood.
MEAN: Abigail argues that she is the virtuous one,
that she is suffering because she is aiding the court,
MATTER: As a result, her ambition inspires her
turning in those who were acting suspicious
to try new methods to be romantically involved
MATTER: In this case, her denouncement
of
the
In the play The Crucible, by Arthur
Abigail never quitting, using her
withMiller,
Proctor,
Williams
is
an
admirable
character
whose
court reveals her admirable ambition to beat the
to use every possible way to
resourcefulness and ambitionresourcefulness
are heroic.
unfair judicial system, and by simply
pointing at the
achieve her goal of Proctor.
paranoia in the air, not creating it, she confirms what
the judges already believe—that evil has invaded the
town and is clouding their judgment.
Quote #3 (Counterargument)
Say: ABIGAIL. No, he’ll be comin’ up. Listen,
now; if they be questioning us,
tell them we danced—I told him as much
MEAN: This passage reveals how Williams can
masterfully arrange plans so that all the girls
involved with the original ritual have the same
Introductions
• You are making a first impression. What
do you do when first meeting someone
you want to like you? Charm? Humor?
Sincerity?
• Writing is a social act.
Introduction
• Anecdotal using Scene
• Interesting Factual statement
• COLLECT NOTES on these moves.
Introductions
• Interesting Statement of Fact
– Start introduction with a compelling fact.
– Tone of introduction is factual, objective, and
scientific.
– Writer is telling reader, “I’m not messing with
feelings. It’s all facts, baby.”
– Good for writing that is heavily leaning on
logic
• Research papers
• Science writing
Introductions
• Take out a piece of paper.
• Write “interesting fact” on this paper.
Introductions
• Interesting Statement of Fact
• Look up a famous person that has the
admirable traits of your character:
• In 1967 John McCain, a United States senator, was shot
down by the North Vietnamese while flying a mission.
• Edith Cavell, a nurse in Belgium during World War One,
was arrested and executed for helping allied servicemen
escape back to England.
.
Introductions
• Look up 3 famous people that has the
admirable traits of your character:
Martin Luther King Junior had a dream. His strong sense of
morals allowed him to think of man, woman, white and
black to live in the same space. He paid the ultimate price
for this strong sense of morality, much the same way as JP
in the play The Crucible.
In the play The Crucible, by Arthur Miller, John Proctor is an
admirable character because of his strong sense of morals.
.
• Example:
In 1967 John McCain, a United States senator, was shot down by
The North Vietnamese while flying a mission. According to
Wikipedia.com, when McCain’s North Vietnamese captors
tortured him, he resorted to making an anti-American confession
in order to avoid further torture. McCain acted in ways that were
unscrupulous in order to survive, and this resourcefulness and
ambition were the only ways he could endure the terrible
conditions of the prison. (Move #1) Not only do political figures
have these admirable traits, but characters in literature also
Demonstrate these admirable qualities..(Move #2) In the play
The Crucible, by Arthur Miller, Abigail Williams is an
admirable character whose resourcefulness and ambition
are
heroic.
Introductions
• Start first sentence with interesting fact
Fifty two percent of marriages end in divorce, which means
someone at some point was not acting admirably. Human
beings (WHO) are embedded with flaws, and it is the drama of
trying to understand these flaws under the light of our strengths
that is the human struggle (WHEN), represented through every
day statistics and in literature. Those who live understanding this
struggle are to be admired for their awareness (WHAT). In the
play The Crucible, John Proctor lives with this awareness,
because of his conscious way of living, he is admirable.
Who, what, where of argument.
– Who: Human Beings, Divorced people
– What: Awareness
– When: Human struggle
Introductions
• Start first sentence with interesting fact
Stanford University’s acceptance rate is 0.6%, and these
candidates are the top students of their schools. These
candidates strive for what they want, despite the statistics,
enduring hours of homework, playing sports, and surviving
disastrous family lives. In the same way these students strove
for greatness, Abigail Williams, in the play The Crucible, also
attains what she wants with ambition against the odds.
Who, what, where of argument.
– Who: Human Beings, Divorced people
– What: Awareness
– When: Human struggle
Introduction
• Take out a piece of paper and label it,
“Statement of Opinion.”
Introduction
• Father Thesis, Baby Thesis: Statement of
Opinion
• Write a more GENERAL version of your thesis as your
first line. First line must HOOK.
Introduction
Father Thesis, Baby Thesis: Statement of Opinion
Write a more GENERAL version of your thesis as your first
line. First line must HOOK.
GENERAL STATEMENT: To survive is supreme, and to die is
failure.
THESIS: In the play The Crucible, by Arthur Miller, Abigail
Williams is an admirable character whose resourcefulness and
ambition are heroic. .
Introduction
Father Thesis, Baby Thesis: Statement of Opinion
Write a more GENERAL version of your thesis as your first
line. First line must HOOK.
GENERAL STATEMENT: To survive is supreme, and to die is
failure. During difficult times, one must take every measure
simply to survive, which takes characteristics that can at times
be difficult to accept. One must act with ambition and
resourcefulness in the face of death of persecution.
THESIS: In the play The Crucible, by Arthur Miller, Abigail
Williams is an admirable character whose resourcefulness and
ambition are heroic. .
Introduction
• Scene
•
•
•
•
Use 3 out of the 5 senses
Quickest way to emotionally convince the reader
Pure storytelling
Mr. Kim is nuts about this one. But you should learn other
techniques.
• Who, what, where of argument.
– Who: People, beings, living creatures
– What: Transience
– Where: Living rooms, kitchens, schools, anywhere!
Introduction
• Take out a piece of paper.
• Label it “Scene Introduction.”
Introduction
• Turn in “Scene Introduction” in the back
tray.
Introduction
• Scene: Write 3 sensory details about a
time you experienced the thesis:
EXAMPLE: MR. KIM’s FATHER IN COMMUNITY
COLLEGE.
3 SENSORY DETAILS
• Air conditioning
• Back Pack zipping
• Whispering of students
Introduction
• Scene: Write 3 sensory details.
The air conditioning of the classroom (WHERE) came down heavily on
my father’s (WHO) head, chilling the sweat off of his neck. The
community college classroom was filled to capacity, with 80 students
rustling papers, zipping up back packs, and whispering to each other
before the professor arrived. My father smelled the strange perfumes
that reminded him of fruit and flowers. When the professor began the
lecture, my father was utterly bewildered. He could catch a few
words, but the Chemistry class seemed fractured, unable to be pieced
together. Although he had a minimal understanding of English, my
father charged ahead to take this class to provide a better life for his
family. The impossibility (WHAT) stared him in the face, but he
attempted the class anyways. He ultimately dropped out of the class,
but it doesn’t mean he is less admirable. (TRANSITION TO
THESIS)It is the reaching that matters more than the attaining.
• Who, what, where of argument.
– Who: My father
– What: impossibility
– Where: Classroom
Introduction
• Scene: Write 3 sensory details.
Use a student sample “admirable” character
Introduction
• Write your thesis after each of your introductions:
Scene, Rhetorical Question, Factual Statement.
• Example:
The black smoke from the burning Blackhawk helicopter smothered
my uncle’s face. He and his partner, Delta Force Sergeant Shugart,
watched as mobs of Somali soldiers approached the crashed
helicopter. Even amid the thumping helicopter blades, my uncle could
hear the shots and cheers of the mob. But my uncle asked to be
lowered closer to the crash. My uncle, Delta Force sniper team leader
Gary Gordon, slid down a nylon rope from the helicopter, landed on
the dirt, and ran to the injured pilot tangled in the crash. My uncle
knew his chances of survival were close to zero. The impossibility
stared him in the face, but he attempted to secure the perimeter
anyways. He ultimately was killed, but it doesn’t mean he is less
admirable. It is the reaching that matters more than the attaining. In
the play The Crucible, by Arthur Miller, John Proctor is one such hero, an
admirable character whose reaching for the impossible is considered
heroic.
•
In groups of 3:
1.
2.
3.
4.
Receive two pieces of paper from Mr. Kim
Hamburger Hot Dog your papers.
Read each person’s introductions.
Critique the following items for each
introduction:
1. Transition from introduction to thesis
2. Presence of: WHO-WHAT-WHERE
5. Vote for each partner’s best introduction
on center diamond.
For full credit, you must turn in all reviews
attached to all 3 introductions.
Introduction
• Note the following items for each introduction:
1. Is the “who-what-where” of the argument present?
2. Do the sentences following the first sentence flow properly? In other
words, is the sentence after the hook relevant or just wacky?
3. Is the transition from introduction to the thesis smooth? Or does it need a
transition word/phrase?
4. Is there even a thesis with “F.A.T.T.”?
• YOU MUST ADDRESS ALL 4 OF THESE ITEMS FOR EACH
INTRODUCTION, “STATEMENT OF OPINION, STATEMENT OF FACT
AND SCENE” IN ORDER TO GET FULL CREDIT.
Hamburger Hotdog Paper
Writer’s Name: Tommy Kim
Quote #1
Quote #2
Say: ABIGAIL. I have been hurt, Mr. Danforth; I
have seen my blood runnin’ out! I have been near to
murdered every day because I done my duty pointing
out the Devil’s people—and this is my reward? To be
mistrusted, denied, questioned like a—
DANFORTH, weakening. Child, I do not mistrust you
ABIGAIL, looking about in the air, clasping her arms
about her as though cold. I—I know not. A wind, a
cold wind, has come. (101)
Say:ABIGAIL. She is blackening my name in the
village! She is telling lies about me! She is a cold,
sniveling woman, and you bend to her! Let her turn
you like a—PROCTOR. Do you look for whippin’?
(22)
MEAN: This passage illustrates just how far
Williams uses any means necessary to win
Proctor’s love, even questioning his manhood.
MEAN: Abigail argues that she is the virtuous one,
that she is suffering because she is aiding the court,
MATTER: As a result, her ambition inspires her
turning in those who were acting suspicious
to try new methods to be romantically involved
MATTER: In this case, her denouncement
of
the
In the play The Crucible, by Arthur
Abigail never quitting, using her
withMiller,
Proctor,
Williams
is
an
admirable
character
whose
court reveals her admirable ambition to beat the
to use every possible way to
resourcefulness and ambitionresourcefulness
are heroic.
unfair judicial system, and by simply
pointing at the
achieve her goal of Proctor.
paranoia in the air, not creating it, she confirms what
the judges already believe—that evil has invaded the
town and is clouding their judgment.
Quote #3 (Counterargument)
Say: ABIGAIL. No, he’ll be comin’ up. Listen,
now; if they be questioning us,
tell them we danced—I told him as much
MEAN: This passage reveals how Williams can
masterfully arrange plans so that all the girls
involved with the original ritual have the same
The Crucible Argumentative
Essay
Take out:
•
• Hamburger/Hamburger paper
• Say-Mean-Matter Power verbs/phrases
worksheet
• (Extra Fun! Vocabulary: Doltish, Asinine,
Moronic, Vapid)
Introduction
• Take out your introduction (Statement of fact and
scene)
• Take out your say-mean-matter hamburger/hotdog
paper
Introduction
• Take out your introduction
• Take out your thesis
• Take out your say-mean-matter hamburger/hotdog
paper
• Take out your 18 moves list
Introduction
• Write your thesis and transition into your thesis
after your favorite introduction:
• Example:
The people worth admiring are the people who don’t know how to be
contained. An artist’s soul is capacious, able to take in the entire
world and place it on a plate, or a blueprint, or a classroom. A
visionary requires limitless thinking and dreaming, a way of being that
cannot be bound by sensibility and conventions. Christopher
Columbus saw a world that in fact never ended, a circumference that
could run forever with enough wind and will. Those who are
tyrannized by fear and limited vision seem always bound by height,
weight, or aptitude, reasons for staying cornered by fear and
cynicism, a combination that always underlies sadness for what is
already determined in their minds. It is our reaching and straining
beyond limitations that make us admirable, that make life boundless
and soaring with the very stars we can’t reach. (Move #1) In the
novel The Great Gatsby, by F. Scott Fitzgerald, Jay Gatsby is one
such hero, an admirable character whose reaching for the
impossible is considered heroic.
Introduction
• Take out the essay “Star Travel” by Tommy Kim.
Introduction
• Writing can be reduced to a series of moves. Let’s see
what kind of moves Mr. Kim has!
•
•
•
•
•
Transience Essay Moves
Take out the essay, “Alive or Remembered,
or Dead and Forgotten” by Elana Ferrante.
Work with a partner
You will highlight each move
I will call on you
Read the first three words of the sentence
for each move.
Essay Moves: The Crucible
1. Transition into thesis
2. Thesis
Paragraph #1
3. Introduction to quote
4. Say #1
5. Mean#1
6. Matter#1
Paragraph #2
7. Transition from matter #1 to next paragraph
8. Introduction to quote (Moves 7 & 8 could be the same sentence)
9. Say #2
10. Mean#2
11. Matter#2
Paragraph #3
12. Transition from matter #2 to next paragraph
13. Introduce counterargument quote (Moves 12 & 13 could be the same sentence)
14. Say #3 (Counterargument)
15. Mean#3
16. Matter#3 (Introduce THE UNTOLD)
Paragraph #4
17. Transition into last paragraph
18. Restatement of thesis
19. Connect thesis to original fact, scene, opinion or the rest of the world
Paragraph #5
Underline and number each move:
1. Transition to thesis
Underline and number each move:
1. Transition to thesis
2. Thesis
Underline and number each move:
1. Transition to thesis
2. Thesis
3. Introduction to quote #1
Underline and number each move:
1. Transition to thesis
2. Thesis
3. Introduction to quote
4. Say #1
Underline and number each move:
1. Transition to thesis
2. Thesis
3. Introduction to quote
4. Say #1
5. Mean#1
Underline and number each move:
1. Transition to thesis
2. Thesis
3. Introduction to quote
4. Say #1
5. Mean#1
6. Matter#1
Underline and number each move:
1. Transition to thesis
2. Thesis
3. Introduction to quote
4. Say #1
5. Mean#1
6. Matter#1
7. Transition from matter #1 to next paragraph
Underline and number each move:
1. Transition to thesis
2. Thesis
3. Introduction to quote
4. Say #1
5. Mean#1
6. Matter#1
7. Transition from matter #1 to next paragraph
8. Introduction to quote (Moves 7 & 8 could be the same
sentence)
Underline and number each move:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
Transition to thesis
Thesis
Introduction to quote
Say #1
Mean#1
Matter#1
Transition from matter #1 to next paragraph
Introduction to quote (Moves 6 & 7 could be the same sentence)
Say #2
Underline and number each move:
1. Transition to thesis
2. Thesis
3. Introduction to quote
4. Say #1
5. Mean#1
6. Matter#1
7. Transition from matter #1 to next paragraph
8. Introduction to quote (Moves 7 & 8 could be the same sentence)
9. Say #2
10.Mean#2
Underline and number each move:
1. Transition to thesis
2. Thesis
3. Introduction to quote
4. Say #1
5. Mean#1
6. Matter#1
7. Transition from matter #1 to next paragraph
8. Introduction to quote (Moves 7 & 8 could be the same sentence)
9. Say #2
10.Mean#2
11.Matter#2
Underline and number each move:
1. Transition to thesis
2. Thesis
3. Introduction to quote
4. Say #1
5. Mean#1
6. Matter#1
7. Transition from matter #1 to next paragraph
8. Introduction to quote (Moves 7 & 8 could be the same sentence)
9. Say #2
10.Mean#2
11.Matter#2
12.Transition from matter #2 to next paragraph
Underline and number each move:
1. Transition to thesis
2. Thesis
3. Introduction to quote
4. Say #1
5. Mean#1
6. Matter#1
7. Transition from matter #1 to next paragraph
8. Introduction to quote (Moves 7 & 8 could be the same sentence)
9. Say #2
10.Mean#2
11.Matter#2
12.Transition from matter #2 to next paragraph
13.Introduce counterargument quote
Underline and number each move:
1. Transition to thesis
2. Thesis
3. Introduction to quote
4. Say #1
5. Mean#1
6. Matter#1
7. Transition from matter #1 to next paragraph
8. Introduction to quote (Moves 7 & 8 could be the same sentence)
9. Say #2
10.Mean#2
11.Matter#2
12.Transition from matter #2 to next paragraph
13.Introduce counterargument quote
14.Say #3 (Counterargument)
Underline and number each move:
1. Transition to thesis
2. Thesis
3. Introduction to quote
4. Say #1
5. Mean#1
6. Matter#1
7. Transition from matter #1 to next paragraph
8. Introduction to quote (Moves 7 & 8 could be the same sentence)
9. Say #2
10.Mean#2
11.Matter#2
12.Transition from matter #2 to next paragraph
13.Introduce counterargument quote
14.Say #3 (Counterargument)
15.Mean#3
Underline and number each move:
1. Transition to thesis
2. Thesis
3. Introduction to quote
4. Say #1
5. Mean#1
6. Matter#1
7. Transition from matter #1 to next paragraph
8. Introduction to quote (Moves 7 & 8 could be the same sentence)
9. Say #2
10.Mean#2
11.Matter#2
12.Transition from matter #2 to next paragraph
13.Introduce counterargument quote
14.Say #3 (Counterargument)
15.Mean#3
16.Matter#3
Underline and number each move:
1. Thesis
2. Transition to thesis
3. Introduction to quote
4. Say #1
5. Mean#1
6. Matter#1
7. Transition from matter #1 to next paragraph
8. Introduction to quote (Moves 7 & 8 could be the same sentence)
9. Say #2
10.Mean#2
11.Matter#2
12.Transition from matter #2 to next paragraph
13.Introduce counterargument quote
14.Say #3 (Counterargument)
15.Mean#3
16.Matter#3
17.Transition into last paragraph
Underline and number each move:
1. Transition to thesis
2. Thesis
3. Introduction to quote
4. Say #1
5. Mean#1
6. Matter#1
7. Transition from matter #1 to next paragraph
8. Introduction to quote (Moves 7 & 8 could be the same sentence)
9. Say #2
10.Mean#2
11.Matter#2
12.Transition from matter #2 to next paragraph
13.Introduce counterargument quote
14.Say #3 (Counterargument)
15.Mean#3
16.Matter#3
17.Transition into last paragraph
18.Restatement of thesis
Underline and number each move:
12. Transition from matter #2 to next paragraph
13. Introduce counterargument quote
14. Say #3 (Counterargument)
15. Mean#3
16. Matter#3
17. Transition into last paragraph
18. Restatement of thesis
19. Connect thesis to original fact, scene, opinion or the rest of the world
Introduction
• Take out your introduction (scene/statement of
fact, statement of opinion)
• Take out your say-mean-matter
hamburger/hamburger paper
• Take out my essay “Alive and Remembered, or
Dead and Forgotten” with your notes.
Essay
Take out the following and begin your essay:
•3 introductions (interesting statement of fact, statement of opinion and
scene)
•Hamburger/Hamburger paper
•My rubric, paragraph by paragraph
Move #1
• Write your thesis after your transition into your
thesis.
• Example:
In 1967 John McCain, a United States senator, was shot down by the
North Vietnamese while flying a mission. According to Wikipedia.com,
when McCain’s North Vietnamese captors tortured him, he resorted to
making an anti-American confession in order to avoid further torture.
McCain acted in ways that were unscrupulous in order to survive, and
this resourcefulness and ambition were the only ways he could endure
the terrible conditions of the prison. Not only do political figures have
these admirable traits, but characters in literature also demonstrate
these admirable qualities.. (Move #1) In the play The Crucible, by
Arthur Miller, Abigail Williams is an admirable character whose
resourcefulness and ambition are heroic. (Move #2)
MOVE #3, PARAGRAPH #2!
• Introduce quote “move. Summarize what is happening
around the quote. Assume the reader hasn’t read the book.)
• Use the following template:
(Character’s Name) first exemplifies how
he/she is admirable by (who-what-when of
scene), “Quote” (Page #)
– Example: Abigail Williams first exemplifies how she is
admirable when the pressure is greatest on her, specifically
when she is in court and is testifying for her innocence,
Move #4 - 6
(Move # 4) ABIGAIL. I have been hurt, Mr. Danforth; I have seen
my blood runnin’ out! I have been near to murdered every day because I
done my duty pointing out the Devil’s people—and this is my reward? To be
mistrusted, denied, questioned like a—
DANFORTH, weakening. Child, I do not mistrust you—
ABIGAIL, looking about in the air, clasping her arms about her as though
cold. I—I know not. A wind, a cold wind, has come. (101)
(Move # 5) Abigail argues that she is the virtuous one, that she
is suffering because she is aiding the court, turning in those
who were acting suspicious. (Move # 6) In this case, her
denouncement of the court reveals her admirable ambition to
beat the unfair judicial system, and by simply pointing at the
paranoia in the air, not creating it, she confirms what the judges
already believe—that evil has invaded the town and is clouding
their judgment.
Move #7 & 8
• Transition “move” into paragraph #3
• Use the following template:
(Move #7) In addition to (Character’s name)
(Admirable traits) displayed in (Where say #1
occurs) we also see these features in scenes
when (Where say #2 occurs). (Move #8)
Another example of (Character’s name) being
admirable takes place when (_who-what-when),
Paragraph #3: Moves 9-11
Move 9 (Say):ABIGAIL. She is blackening my name in the village! She is
telling lies about me! She is a cold, sniveling woman, and you bend to her!
Let her turn you like a—
PROCTOR. Do you look for whippin’? (22)
Move 10 (Mean) This passage illustrates just how far Williams uses any
means necessary to win Proctor’s love, even questioning his manhood.
Move 11 (Matter) As a result, her ambition inspires her to try new methods
to be romantically involved with Proctor, never quitting, using her
resourcefulness to use every possible way to achieve her goal of Proctor.
Paragraph #4: Moves 12-16
Move 12 (Contrast Transition): Although this character’s traits are overall
admirable, there are some traits that some might find unappealing, such s the
time when Move 13 (Introduce quote):
• Move 14 (Say: a quote that CONTRADICTS your thesis)“ABIGAIL. No, he’ll be
comin’ up. Listen, now; if they be questioning us, tell them we danced—I told him as
much already. (18)
Move 15 (Mean): This passage reveals how Williams can masterfully arrange plans
so that all the girls involved with the original ritual have the same account of the
incident. Move 16 (Matter): Ultimately, Abigail Williams ambitiously
arranges the proper stories to tell using her resourceful mind. Though this
may be immoral to some who are obsessive with rules, in the end Williams
allows her friends and herself a way to escape the . (Unmentioned
Variable) cruel punishments given out during that time, punishment that
included stone presses, hangings, and drowning. The pure ambition to
survive allowed Williams to survive the ruthless persecution of that era.
Paragraph #5: Moves 16-18
16.
17.
18
Transition into last paragraph
Restatement of thesis
Connect thesis to the rest of the world
(Move 17: Transition) On the whole, Abigail
Williams’ survived her time, which is not what we can say about
Proctor. (Move 19: Restatement of thesis) In order to enjoy our
life, we must be alive, and because of Abigail Williams’ admirable
ambition and resourcefulness, she lives another day (Move 18:
Connect thesis to rest of the world). This survival is a primary
drive in all of human civilization, including during war, when we
must take any measure possible to survive, just as John McCain
did when the North Vietnamese electrocuted, beat, and starved
him.
Essay Rubric
• Attach the following:
– Rough draft of essay (printed)
– Three introductions
– Two peer edits of introductions
– Say-mean-matter: Hamburger/Hamburger outline
• Typed draft is due Friday: 11/14.
Essay Rubric
• If you are finished, turn in the following,
stapled:
1. Your Essay
2. The rubric, graded by your partner (attach the
paper your partner WROTE on)
Finish!
1. Turn in your rough draft in the back tray.
2. If you are not done, finish the essay this weekend or come into
tutoring during lunch. Or schedule a time to meet. DEMAND
a time to meet. Own your life.