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ONCE ON A HOUSETOP
Scene 1 – Opening
Once On A Housetop
All:
Once on a housetop things started happening out in the winter air.
Bells started ringin’ and folks started singin’ and reindeer were ev’rywhere!
Snowballs flyin’ left and right. I saw an angel or two.
Falling stars lit up the night.
Solo: I even saw an elf, it’s true!
All: You say you saw an elf? Yahoo!
Once on a housetop chimneys were billowing, smoke circling in the sky.
Look! There’s a candy cane filling a window pane, even saw a reindeer fly!
Folks eating latkes left and right, and lighting candles too!
Falling stars lit up the night.
Solo: I even saw an elf, it’s true!
All: In fact he looked a lot like you!
Solo: Who me?
All: Yes, you! I think he looked a lot like you!
Once on a housetop things started happening out in the winter air.
Bells started ringin’ and folks started singin’ and reindeer were ev’rywhere!
Snowballs flyin’ left and right. I saw an angel or two.
Love and joy that magic night, Merry Christmas to you!
Oh, Happy Hanukkah too!
Oh, Happy Kwanzaa, Feliz Navidad, and Happy New Year too!
Once on a housetop, our dreams came true!
Speaker 1:
(coughing) Wow! It is so smoky in here I can hardly breath!
Speaker 2:
(choking) I can hardly see my hand in front of my eyes!
Speaker 3:
(waving hand) Somebody open a window or turn on a fan!
Speaker 4:
Every time we light a fire in that fireplace this whole house gets filled up with smoke!
Speaker 1:
No kidding! It’s like living in an ash can!
Speaker 2:
I think it’s time to get that chimney cleaned out.
Speaker 3:
Somebody call that chimney cleaning company and see if they can come out today.
All:
Hey chimney sweeps!!!
Speaker 4:
Maybe they’ll give us a deal if they can clean everybody’s chimney in the
neighborhood.
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(Sweeps enter, dressed in black, with smudges of ash on their cheeks, etc. They carry chimney sweep
brooms and other tools used to make different percussion sounds.)
Ashes to Ashes
All:
Ashes to ashes and dust to dust!
Cleaning ch-ch-chimneys is a chimney sweep must!
A sweeper is a somebody that you can trust!
That’s ashes to ashes and dust to dust.
I said, ashes to ashes and dust to dust.
Let’s sweep! Let’s sweep! Let’s sweep! Achoo!
Ember, solo 1:
It doesn’t matter if you’re a girl or a guy!
Keep lookin’ for a chimney you can occupy.
Climbin’ on a rooftop up to the sky!
A sweeper’s a person with a natural high!
All:
Let’s sweep! Let’s sweep! Let’s sweep! Achoo!
Hazy, solo 2:
I’m covered in carbon, I’m covered in soot!
I’m covered in ashes from head to foot!
A sweeper is a person who’s never mean,
A sweeper is a person who’s never clean!
All:
Let’s sweep! Let’s sweep! Let’s sweep! Achoo!
Clean-out, solo 3:
A sweep can be tiny, a sweep can be tall!
A chimney sweep is careful ‘cause he just might fall!
You can’t believe the place that we have to crawl!
If you need a chimney swept, just give us a call!
All:
Let’s sweep! Let’s sweep! Let’s sweep! Achoo!
(Percussion interlude)
Ashes to ashes and dust to dust!
Cleaning ch-ch-chimneys is a chimney sweep must!
A sweeper is a somebody that you can trust!
That’s ashes to ashes and dust to dust.
I said, ashes to ashes and dust to dust! Huh!
(Sweeps stand at attention with brooms over shoulders like military. They are very proud of their
profession they share. They are being inspected by Sweep One and Sweep Two.)
Scrub:
Scrape:
Attention sweeps!
Brooms up! Shoulders down!
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Scrub:
Stomachs in! Look sharp now!
Scrape:
We’ve got a soiled, I mean, SOLID reputation to uphold here! Now….who are we?
Sweeps:
(like military) Sweeps sir!
Scrub:
And what do we do?
Sweeps:
Sweep sir!
Scrape:
And what do we sweep?
(All of the sweeps look at each other and scratch their heads as if they have no idea, ad libbing, “I don’t
know,” “Beats me,” etc.)
Scrub:
(exasperated) Chimneys! You turkeys! We sweep chimneys!
Sweeps:
That’s right! We sweep chimneys, sir! I mean, ma’am.
Scrape:
We do? I mean, that’s right! We do! That’s right! We sweep chimneys! (looks in chimney)
And judging by the looks of things, this must be the place. I’ve never seen such a bunch of
clogged up chimneys in my life!
Little Ash:
Me neither! We better get to work or these people are going to have some smoky surprises
for their holidays!
Scrub:
Now fan out everybody and let’s get to work! Let’s make this the best holiday these folks
have ever had by making sure their chimneys are safe, sound, and sanitary!
(All of the sweeps get in a huddle putting one hand in the center like an athletic team.)
Scrub:
One, two, three….
Sweeps:
GO SWEEPS!
Scene 2 - Santa
(The sweeps spread out to go to different chimneys. Cobweb and Big Ash get ready to work on the
chimney at center stage. One of them is trying to get in to it but can’t seem to get anywhere.)
Cobweb:
(partly into the chimney but frustrated by not being able to go any farther) Boy! This is the
most clogged up chimney I’ve ever tried to clean. Why, I can’t even get down in there to
get a look at it.
Big Ash:
(changing places with his partner) Here let me try! I’ve never seen a chimney I couldn’t
conquer. (He stomps a foot in the chimney)
Santa:
(a voice from in the chimney) Ouch! Ho! Ho! Ho!
Cobweb:
(to Big Ash) What happened? Did you hurt yourself?
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Big Ash:
(not understanding) I didn’t say anything. (stomps again)
Santa:
(louder) Ouch! Ho! Ho! Ho!
Cobweb:
What’s the matter with you? Why do you keep saying ouch and laughing?
Big Ash:
more)
I didn’t say anything! It came from in there! (He points down the chimney. Stomps once
Santa:
Ouch! Ho! Ho! Ho!
(Shocked and even a little frightened, Big Ash jumps out of the chimney and of the Sweeps look down into
the chimney. They look at each other and then scream a la “Home Alone.”
Cobweb and Big Ash: AHHHHHHHHH!
A Big Red Fella in the Chimney
A
There’s a big red fella in the chimney,
Somebody’s gotta call the cops!
Gotta get him outta there
(‘cause it’s getting’ hotter there)
before that chimney pops!
It’s a crazy silly situation.
I’m calling “nine-one-one,” (to coda)
‘cause a big, red fella in the chimney’s really not a lotta fun!
What does he think he’s doing?
That’s not what a chimney’s for!
There’s no use boo-hoo-hooing,
But why can’t he use the door?
What does he think he’s trying?
He’s way too big for that!
We’ll have to keep on prying,
This fella’s way too fat!
Solo 1:
Somebody bring me a crow bar!
Solo 2:
Somebody get some wax!
Solo 3:
How ‘bout a plunger?
Solo 4:
A ladder?
Solo 5:
A diet!
Solo 6:
Somebody get me an ax!
Coda
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‘cause a big, red fella in the chimney’s really not a lotta,
it’s getting’ hotta,
not a lotta fun!
(spoken) He’s gonna blow! (All cower….one uses a dynamite plunger)
(All jump like there’s been an explosion and fall over-Santa pops out of the chimney.
Santa:
Ho! Ho! Ho! Merry Christmas everybody!
(The sweeps stare at him in disbelief)
All:
It’s Santa Clause!
Santa:
Of course! Who did you expect, Mary Poppins? Ho! Ho! Ho! (He laughs as his own joke.)
Little Ash:
Well, Santa, what were you doing halfway down that chimney?
Santa:
Why, I was trying to deliver presents to that wonderful family down there, but I’m afraid
that half way down I got stuck! I guess I’ve been enjoying a few too many of Mrs. Claus’
Christmas cookies. Ho! Ho! Ho! Oh dear! (He is now very worried.)
Little Ash:
Well, maybe this year you’d better just use the door instead of the chimney, Santa!
(All of the other Sweeps look at him like that is the craziest idea they ever heard.)
Scrape:
(Sarcastically toward Little Ash) Oh yeah right, Santa coming through the front
door…that’s festive! (then to Santa) Don’t worry Santa. You haven’t gained too much
weight, it’s just that this chimney is so full of carbon and cobwebs that nobody could fit
down it. Nobody, that is except professional Chimney Sweeps like us! Sweeps, Ten Hut!
(All Sweeps jump up to stand at attention.)
Scrub:
Little Ash! Do your thing!
(Little Ash jumps into the chimney and disappears. All watch and listen as things start flying out of the
chimney, ashes, newspaper, a log, a shoe, a rubber chicken, anything ridiculous. Eventually it stops and
out jumps a very dirty Little Ash!)
Little Ash:
All finished sir! Clean as a whistle! There will be plenty of room for you now Mr. Claus!
Santa:
Oh ho! Ho! Thank you ever so much for all of your help. (he begins to climb into the
chimney) Now I can deliver my presents and be on my way! Merry Christmas to all and
to all a good… (he falls into the chimney call after himself) …..Niiiiiiiight!
Scene 3 - Kwanzaa
(At another chimney, a Sweep is calling to the others to come and have a look. At the auxiliary stage, a
little girl is sitting alone crying and looking dejected.)
Fluey:
Hey Sweepstakes! Come over here and have a look at this!
(Sweepstakes rushes over to look in the chimney.)
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Sweepstakes: What is it Fluey?
Fluey:
Look down there. I’ve never seen such a dejected child in all my life!
Smolder:
What do you think is the problem?
(The child sighs.)
Fluey:
Sadness, Smolder. Simply sadness.
Smolder:
Oh how awful…and here it is holiday time and all…
Sooty:
Well, we just can’t stand here. We’ve got to do something about it!
Sweepstakes: Oh Fluey! What can we do to help cheer her up?
Fluey:
First, let’s just listen!
Sweepstakes: (eagerly) Listening is always good!
Fluey:
Shh, everybody! Let’s see if we can tell why she feels so blue.
(All the Sweeps gather around the chimney to listen.)
Kwanzaa Child: (aloud but to herself) I’ve had a really bad year. I don’t even deserve to celebrate
Kwanzaa with the rest of my family.
Sweepstakes: Wow! What could she have done that was so terrible?
All the Sweeps: (to Sweepstakes) SHHH!
Kwanzaa Child: I could list a million bad things I did this year and still not list them all. I deserve to be
left out of all of the Kwanzaa festivities now and forever!
Smolder:
A million bad things IS a lot! But, she doesn’t look like she could possibly be that bad.
Sooty:
No, in fact she looks downright adorable to me!
(All the Sweeps look at him/her with eye rolls and glares. He/she answers them with a shrug.)
Brick:
Doesn’t that little girl know that Kwanzaa is a holiday that helps us celebrate all the
wonderful things in our lives?
Sooty:
Yeah, like family and friends…
Smolder:
Faith and creativity…
Sweepstakes: Unity and purpose!
Brick:
Not only that, but Kwanzaa is a time for new ideas, new dreams, a fresh start!
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Sooty:
Well, what are we going to do about it, Sweeps?
Brick:
Quiet, give me a moment to think!
(They all watch as he/she thinks.)
Brick:
I’ve got it!
All:
He’s (She’s) got it!!!
Brick:
We’ve just got to convince this little child that every year during Kwanzaa we can all start
over again.
Sooty:
We celebrate our past and look forward to our future.
Brick:
This little girl needs to believe that she deserves that chance, too!
All:
(they don’t get it yet) O.K.?????
Brick:
Come on gather around the chimney, Sweeps! We’ve got a message to deliver.
Fluey:
(Calling gently down the chimney) Yoo Hoo! Little sad girl! Yoo Hoo!
(The little girl looks up at the sound of the voice.)
All Sweeps:
(gently) Yoo hoo!
(The girl looks at the fireplace and then moves over to it. Eventually she sits down in front of it,
listening.)
(During the song, the child will light the seven candles of the Kinara. She could also put on some festive
African clothing using the colors red, black, and green. The Sweeps might drop down to her the candles
and the Kwanzaa clothing.)
Kwanzaa Child
Kwanzaa Child don’t be blue.
There’s a bright golden future waiting just for you.
You’ll be strong, you’ll be fine.
This is the precious day that you will start to shine.
We’ll celebrate a new beginning with friends from far and near.
We’ll dedicate ourselves to winning as we welcome a brand new year!
Kwanzaa Child it’s your day.
We will stay right beside you all along the way.
Here’s to you, here’s to all!
And to the one like you who answers the Kwanzaa call.
We’ll light a candle to our freedom to faith and unity.
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To the right that we have to become the very best that we can be!
Kwanzaa Child Solo:
Kwanzaa Child, I can see
there’s a bright golden future waiting just for me.
I’ll be strong, I’ll be fine.
It just takes a dream to become a Kwanzaa Child
All:
It just takes a dream to become a Kwanzaa Child
Kwanzaa Child Solo:
I have what it takes to be a Kwanzaa Child.
All:
I can see that you are a Kwanzaa Child.
Scene 4 - Hanukkah
(The Sweeps are looking down a chimney of a family so poor that they don’t have the ingredients to make
latkes. Eventually, the Sweeps toss the ingredients from their won lunches down the chimney as the
family makes their latkes.)
Rooftop:
O.K. Sweeps! Good work!
Skyline:
Now take a good long lunch break! Say THREE minutes or so.
(The Sweeps take out their lunch pails and start unpacking their lunch.)
Dusty:
Get over here, Sweeps. We’ve got an emergency!
(All run to the next chimney. Below, a family is sitting around a table with a menorah, a dreidl, etc, but no
food.)
Rooftop:
Now what is it?
Dusty:
(Like a police sergeant giving a report, slowly and deliberately) Poor family, boss! Mighty
poor! So poor they don’t have the ingredients for simple latkes!
Shingles:
No latkes!
Dusty:
That right, Shingles. No latkes! And it’s Hunukkah, sir/ma’am.
Shingles:
(can’t believe the tragedy) No latkes! And it’s Hunukkah!?
(From family below.)
Father:
I’m sorry children. We simply don’t have the money to buy all of the ingredients. We’ll
just have to celebrate Hanukkah without latkes this year.
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Child:
It’s O.K. father. We can still have a wonderful time together even without latkes. (Trying
to make his/her father feel better.) I don’t really like those old potato pancakes anyway.
Mother:
(Sadly.) We’re sorry, children. We’re so sorry!
(At the top of the chimney.)
Skyline:
Sweeps! Cease eating immediately!
(Sweeps stop mid-chew)
Rooftop and Skyline: Ten hut!!!
(The Sweeps jump to attention. Some are saluting with a sandwich in one hand, or a ring of bologna at
the head so they look silly.)
Bristle:
Now what does it take to make a potato pancake anyway?
Sweepy:
(Holding up a potato from his lunch pail.) Well, potatoes are a pretty good start. Let’s toss
some down the chimney!
(Skyline grabs the potato from his hand and tosses it down the chimney. It surprises the family as it makes
a thud in their fireplace.)
Child:
(pointing to the fireplace) Look father! Potatoes!
(the family rushes to the fireplace to check it out)
Rooftop:
Now, what else?
Sweepy:
(holding up some onions) Well, some onions would be nice.
(Rooftop take them and tosses them and tosses them down the chimney. The children scramble to pick
them up.)
Child:
Look mother! Onions!
Sweepy:
(holding up a sack of flour) Some flour!
Skyline:
Dump it!
(They toss the flour down the chimney. By now the mother has a bowl and is catching the ingredients in it.
As the Sweeps call out their ingredient, they dump it into the chimney.)
Bristle:
Salt!
Shingles:
Parsley!
Sweepy:
Lemon juice!
Dusty:
Vegetable oil!
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Shingles:
How about a carrot?
Bristle:
Why not? And Eggs!
All:
Oooo!
(Bristle hesitates for a second, then takes the two eggs, cracks them on the side of the chimney and drops
the insides down the chimney and into the bowl.)
Rooftop and Skyline: (to the other Sweeps) That it?
Sweeps:
That’s it!
Family:
(calling up from the chimney) That’s it!
All:
Latkes for everyone!
(Everybody cheers as the music begins. The family is so happy that they sing a song.)
Lotsa Latkes
Oy chiribiribiri bim bom bom. Oy chiribiribiri bim bom bom.
Oy chiribiribiri bim bom bom. Oy chiribiribiri bim bom bom.
Mother solo:
Lotsa latkes for ev’ryone now,
let’s all shout hooray!
Eat ‘em hot ‘cause they’ll soon be gone now,
on this holiday!
Father solo:
Long ago the Maccabees won
a vict’ry we celebrate!
There was oil for only one night,
but it lasted for all eight!
All:
Light the candle, (stomp) spin the dreidl, give it a mighty toss!
Light the fire (clap) warm the griddle, pour on the applesauce!
Yeah!
Oy chiribiribiri bim bom bom. Oy chiribiribiri bim bom bom.
Oy chiribiribiri bim bom bom. Oy chiribiribiri bim bom bom.
Lotsa latkes light as a feather!
Lots for me and you!
We’re so happy singing together:
Happy Hanukkah too! (repeat)
Have a latke or two!
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Happy Hanukkah too!
Scene 6 – Nativity
(The stage is set with the manger scene. Clean-up looks down a chimney and call to the others.)
Clean-up:
(in an excited whisper) You guys! You guys! Come over here! I’m seeing the most
miraculous thing!
Dustpan:
Get off that roof, Clean-up! We don’t have to sweep the chimneys on the stables, too!
Clean-up:
No really! You’ve got to see what I see down there!
(A bunch of Sweeps rush over to his chimney and look down it. After about five seconds of looking they
slowly lift their heads, look directly at each other and then the audience.)
All:
It’s a baby!
Just A Tiny Baby
Clean-up solo:
He’s just a little bitty baby in a manger, just the tiniest thing.
How could just a tiny baby in a manger come to make the angels sing?
All:
He’s just a little bitty baby in a manger, just the tiniest thing.
How could just a tiny baby in a manger grow to be a mighty king?
Shepherds are coming full of love just to see the tiny child.
Angels are singing from above for the baby meek and mild,
for the tiny little child.
La la la……
Wise men are trav’ling from afar, as the story was foretold,
Led to the baby by a star! He’s more precious than all their gold!
And he’s only one day old.
Clean-up solo:
He’s just a little bitty baby in a manger, just the tiniest thing.
How could just a tiny baby in a manger come to make the angels sing?
All:
He’s just a little bitty baby in a manger, just the tiniest thing.
How could just a tiny baby in a manger grow to be a mighty king?
This tiny baby in a manger will be a mighty king.
(After the song is over there is a clunk from the fireplace in the stable. One of the Chimney Sweeps’
brooms has fallen down the chimney. All of the people in the stable look at it and one of the shepherds
says…)
Shepherd 1:
What was that?
Shepherd 2:
(with awe) Myrrh!
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All in nativity: (with awe and understanding ) Ahhhhh!
Scene 7 – Pinata Party
(Meanwhile, at the Chimney Sweep scene an Angel has walked up behind the unsuspecting Chimney
Sweeps.)
Angel 1:
Hi guys! Whacha looking at down there? Heaven’s thata way! (points up)
Sweeps:
(frightened) AHHHHHHH!
Angel 1:
(Looking down the chimney into the stable) I hope I’m not too late to see the baby! Ah!
There he his! Perfect in every way!
Coal:
Are you really an Angel?
Angel 1:
Well, I’m not the fairy godmother! And who are you?
Coal:
I’m Coal! (He puffs up proudly) I’m a Chimney Sweep!
Angel 1:
So you are! Well, take a bath or two why don’t ya! Now I just got a distress call from a
kid who says she’s having a problem with a pivotal piñata! You sweeps know anything
about that?
(the Sweeps look at each other and shake their heads)
Dustpan:
No sir, your honor, we don’t know anything about that, but nothing would surprise me
with all of the holiday celebrations going on around here.
Angel 1:
Well, this sounded pretty serious. Seems like there is a piñata party going on at one of your
neighbors’ homes, and one tiny kid was having a miserable time because he/she could
never break the piñata when it was his/her turn.
Coal:
(worried) Oh, that can be terribly hard on one’s self esteem.
Pitch:
So, what can we do to help out, your highness?
Angel 1:
Well, you can help me find the home of that little senor/senorita so we can try to help make
his/her party a little more fun this year!
Smoky:
You came to the right place, pal. Sweeps, Ten Hut!
(The Sweeps line up at attention like before)
Smoky:
I want you all to spread out. Search every chimney in town and find the piñata party! (to
the angel) We’ll find that boy/girl or my name’s not Smoky! (to the Sweeps) Now move!
(They all spread out looking into all of the different chimneys. In the piñata scene, a group of brightlydressed revelers enter. One small child is blind-folded. A taller child is holding a pole with a piñata
hanging from it. He/she is trying to reach it but cannot.)
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Break the Pinata
Break the piñata, see the candy on the ground!
Sing a serenata, it’s a holiday sound!
Sing Feliz Navidad, it’s a happy holiday!
Sing along the promenade, dance the night away!
Hey! Feliz Navidad, Merry Christmas ev’ryone!
Feliz ano nuevo, Happy New year too! (repeat)
(Angel 2 appears in the scene and helps the small child break the piñata.)
Break the piñata! Break it! Break it!
Break the piñata! Break it! Break it!
Break the piñata! Break the piñata!
Break the piñata! Break the piñata! Ole! (Breaks piñata and scramble for candy.)
Hey! Feliz Navidad, Merry Christmas ev’ryone!
Feliz ano nuevo, Happy New year too! (repeat)
Happy New year too!
Scene 8 –Finale
(Angel 2 joins Angel 1 with the Sweeps.)
Smudge:
Wow! I never realized there were so many ways to celebrate the season!
Angel 2:
From the little baby born in a stable, to the Kwanzaa celebration of new ideas…
Smudge:
From the beautiful candles of the Hanukkah season to the piñatas of Las Posadas…
Cinder:
And don’t forget that big red fella in the chimney!
Angel 2:
All around your neighborhood and all around the world, people use this time of year to get
together with family and friends, share the bounties of the earth with each other, and get a
new lease on life!
Smoky:
It’s like a breath of fresh air!
Cinder:
Well yeah, now that we cleaned out all those chimneys!
(Everybody agrees.)
Smudge:
And this year we all helped make everybody’s holiday a little bit better!
Cinder:
That’s ‘cause (rapping) we’re… “ashes to ashes and dust to dust!”
All:
Ashes to ashes and dust to dust!
Smoky:
And it was so easy!
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Angel 2:
Amen brother/sister! Sometimes miracles happen in the smallest and most unassuming
places!
Smoky:
Like here, on these housetops?
Angel 2:
Like here! In these homes! Happy Holidays everyone!
All:
Happy Holidays!
Reprise – Once On A Housetop
Once on a housetop things started happening our in the winter air.
Bells started ringin’ and folks started singin’ and reindeer were ev’rywhere!
Snowballs flyin’ left and right. I saw an angel or two.
Falling stars lit up the night.
Solo: I even saw an elf, it’s true!
All:
You say you saw an elf? Yahoo!
Once on a housetop chimneys were billowing, smoke circling in the sky.
Look! There’s a candy cane filling a window pane, even saw a reindeer fly!
Folks eating latkes left and right, and lighting candles too!
Falling stars lit up the night.
Solo: I even saw an elf, it’s true!
All:
In fact looked a lot like you!
Solo: Who me?
All:
Yes, you! I think he looked a lot like you!
Once on a housetop things started happening our in the winter air.
Bells started ringin’ and folks started singin’ and reindeer were ev’rywhere!
Snowballs flyin’ left and right. I saw an angel or two.
Love and joy that magic night, Merry Christmas to you!
Oh, Happy Hanukkah too!
Oh, Happy Kwanzaa, Feliz Navidad, and Happy New Year too!
Once on a housetop, our dreams came true!
(Curtain call.)