T: Doctrine and Application for Creating
Fabulous Families and Marriages
W: Great Activities to Do on the Sabbath to Bless
You and Your Family
Th: Effective Family Councils: How, When, and
F: Highest Priorities for Raising Valiant Children
Who Will Work Miracles for the Lord Now and
Elder M. Russell
Ballard, Conference Report April 2012
APPLICATION FOR CREATING FABULOUS
FAMILIES AND MARRIAGES
What is the vision our Heavenly Father and
Savior have for families?
Motherhood and fatherhood are the noblest and most demanding, yet most rewarding careers on earth.
What is an ideal marriage?
When we follow the prophets with faith in Jesus
Christ we can go forth with vision, create celestial families, and have great joy in the journey.
Nothing we do while on the earth is of greater importance than what we do in our homes with our families.
-- Preparing for Exaltation Teachers Manual http://www.lds.org/manual/preparing-for-exaltation-teachers-manual/lesson-40-home-a-school-for-eternity?lang=eng
“The most sacred place on earth may not be the temple, necessarily. The chapel, the stake house, and the temple are sacred as they contribute to the building of the most sacred institution in the
Church—the home—and to the blessing of the most sacred relationships in the Church, the family” (That All May Be Edified , 234–35).
-- Quoted in Preparing for Exaltation Teachers
Brothers and sisters, the most
important cause of our
lifetime is our families. If we will devote ourselves to this cause, we will improve every other aspect of our lives and will become, as a people and as a church, an example and a beacon for all peoples of the earth.
Elder M. Russell
Ballard, Ensign, May 2012 “That the Lost May Be Found” https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2012/04/that-the-lost-may-befound?lang=eng
The family is ordained of God. It is the most
important unit in time and in eternity. Even before we were born on the earth, we were part of a family
As part of our Heavenly Father’s plan, we were born into families. He established families to
bring us happiness, to help us learn correct
principles in a loving atmosphere, and to
prepare us for eternal life.
Church Handbook of Instruction p.2
Parents have the vital responsibility to help their children prepare to return to Heavenly Father.
Parents fulfill this responsibility by teaching their children to follow Jesus Christ and live
Church Handbook of Instruction p.2
Through the restored gospel we learn there is an ideal family.
It is a family composed of a righteous
Melchizedek Priesthood bearer with a righteous wife sealed to him and children born in the covenant or sealed to them. With a mother in the home in an environment of love and service, the parents teach their children, through example and precept, the ways of the Lord and His truths.
They fulfill their divinely appointed roles mentioned in the family proclamation. Their children mature by living teachings instilled from birth. They develop characteristics of obedience, integrity, love of God, and faith in His holy plan.
In due course, each of those children seeks a companion with similar ideals and aspirations.
They are sealed in the temple, bear children, and the eternal plan continues, with generation strengthening generation.
I testify of the great blessing of children and of the happiness they will bring us in this life and in the eternities.
…. Many voices in the world today marginalize the importance of having children or suggest delaying or limiting children in a family.
In our day prophets and apostles have declared. “The first commandment , that God gave to Adam and Eve pertained to their potential for parenthood as husband and wife. We declare that God’s commandment for His children to multiply and replenish the earth remains in force.”
All members, even if they have never married or are without family in the Church, should strive for the ideal of living in an eternal family. This means preparing to become worthy spouses and loving fathers or mothers. In some cases these blessings will not be fulfilled until the next life, but the ultimate goal is the same for all.
- Church Handbook of Instruction 1.3.3
I believe the mission statement for mortality might be “to build an eternal family.” Here on this earth we strive to become part of extended families with the ability to create and form our own part of those families.
First and Firmest to Follow the Brethren
Take 30 seconds… Consider what is the purpose and vision for my family?
Does my family have a motto? Should it? How could having a motto or mission statement that reflects the Lord’s vision for my family bless my family?
A wise parent would never miss a chance to gather children together to learn of the doctrine of
Jesus Christ. Such moments are so rare in comparison with the efforts of the enemy. For every hour the power of doctrine is introduced into a child’s life, there may be hundreds of hours of messages and images denying or ignoring the saving truths.
Elder Henry B. Eyring, “The Power of
Teaching Doctrine” Conference Report,
April 1999 http://www.lds.org/general-conference/1999/04/the-power-ofteaching-doctrine?lang=eng
The question should not be whether we are too tired to prepare to teach doctrine or whether it wouldn’t be better to draw a child closer by just having fun or whether the child isn’t beginning to think that we preach too much. The question must be, “With so little time and so few opportunities, what words of doctrine from me will fortify them against the attacks on their faith which are sure to come?” The words you speak today may be the ones they remember.
And today will soon be gone.
Elder Henry B. Eyring, “The Power of Teaching Doctrine”
Conference Report, April 1999 http://www.lds.org/general-conference/1999/04/the-power-of-teaching-doctrine?lang=eng
Wednesday’s class on how to use the Sabbath to
Teach and Bless your Family – the Doctrine and
Regardless of your circumstances, you can center your home and your life on the Lord Jesus Christ, for He is the source of true peace in this life.
Be certain that every decision you make, whether temporal or spiritual, is conditioned on what the
Savior would have you do. When He is the center of your home, there is peace and serenity. There is a spirit of assurance that pervades the home, and it is felt by all who dwell there.
Sing Hymns as the children are waking and you are preparing breakfast
Have family devotional at/around Breakfast
Sing Hymn together – 1 st
Presidency Preface Hymnbook
Scripture Reading (3 mins in Book of Mormon)
5-15 minutes total
Kisses and Hugs Goodbye as children and spouse go to their school or work
Specific time in the morning (perhaps 10 am)
Have Pre-school or scripture reading time with your preschoolers
Use nursery manual pictures online, in book, the resources are endless.
Love and be with your children without interruption for 15 mins to an hour (whatever you can give)
Read to your children as they lay down for their naps
Select scripture stories that show who true heroes really are
Some children form their heroes as young as 3, so you deliberately teach and testify to them
(through out the day) of Heavenly Father’s real heroes and valiant warriors.
Use gospel in art pictures to teach a 3 min spiritual lesson to teach a scripture story to your children each day at lunch time. These minutes and days will add up and your children will be the greatest generation of missionaries and valiant mothers and fathers and church leaders.
Before children arrive home from school, prepare yourself the hours before to greet them and give them your full attention
This means that shopping, visiting teaching, housework, some things that need to be done, are done before the children get home
When they get home, greet them with a snack and talk to them about their day
Then children do homework together
If you have a lot of little children, it’s helpful to help the oldest child, help the younger child, and be their tutor
After an hour or two of homework, children can have free time or play time
Sometimes having this structure for children in the home, is more important to their eternal welfare than running to team sports or outside the home activities, even though these things might be good.
Think: good, better, best.
“However worthy and appropriate other demands or activities may be, they must not be permitted to displace the divinely-appointed duties that only parents and families can adequately perform.” http://www.lds.org/pa/display/0,17884,5154-1,00.html
Half hour before dinner time, children return from playing and their activities to do their room checks (3x5 card by the light-switch) and help prepare dinner and dad’s arrival (even if he isn’t able to be there for dinner and family time)
Sing “I’m so glad when daddy comes home” at
Family scripture study before or after dinner
Family responsibilities clean up of dinner
Mother or dad reads to the children (if you have several children in different bedrooms, read in hallway/ one child read in their bed)
Kneel by their bed for prayer
Spend 15 minutes with your spouse (or yourself) before bed and discuss the home evening lesson you just had or will have, tues – priesthood lesson, wed – RS lesson, thurs – yw/ym lesson,
Friday – Date night, Saturday night – lesson for
Sunday church (with children too), Sunday – specifics for Gospel Study discussed on Tuesday.
“The Family is Ordained of God. Marriage between Man and Woman is essential to his eternal plan. Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a Father and a Mother who honor marital vows with complete fidelity.”
-The Family: A Proclamation to the World https://www.lds.org/topics/family-proclamation
By divine design, Fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families.
-The Family: A Proclamation to the World https://www.lds.org/topics/family-proclamation
” EZRA TAFT BENSON
Yes, these times require great things from fathers, and so does the Lord. Three requirements are: create a home where love and the Spirit of the Lord may abide; bring up children in light and truth; and set your homes in order.
EZRA TAFT BENSON
The sacred title of “father” is shared with the
Almighty. In the Church men are called and released. Did you ever hear of a mortal father being released?
EZRA TAFT BENSON
Fatherhood is not a matter of station or wealth; it is a matter of desire, diligence, and determination to see one’s family exalted in the celestial kingdom. If that prize is lost, nothing else really matters.
Leaders should ensure that Sunday meetings are not so numerous that there is little time for parents and children to be together on that day.
When possible, leaders should avoid scheduling
Sunday meetings other than those in the standard three-hour schedule, leadership meetings in the early mornings, and occasional meetings on evenings.
Church Handbook of Instruction p. 138 https://www.lds.org/handbook/handbook-2-administering-the-church/meetings-in-the-church
“Motherhood is near to divinity. It is the
highest, holiest service to be assumed by
mankind. It places her who honors its holy calling and service next to the angels.”
– Russell M. Nelson Ensign, May 1999,38 http://www.lds.org/ensign/1999/05/our-sacred-duty-to-honor-women
"The homemaker has the ultimate career. All other careers exist for one purpose only and that is to support the ultimate career." — C.S. Lewis
“In this age when more and more women are turning to daily work, how tremendous it is, once in a while, to stop and recognize that the greatest service that any woman will ever perform with be in nurturing, teaching, lifting, encouraging, and rearing her children in righteousness and truth. There is no other thing that will compare with
that regardless of what she does. I hope that the women of the Church will not slight their greatest responsibility in favor of a lesser responsibility. To the mothers of this church, every mother who is here this day, I want to say that, as the years pass, you will become increasingly grateful for that which you did in molding the lives of your children in the direction of righteousness and goodness and integrity and faith.”
President Gordon B. Hinckley (Heber City/Springville, Utah, regional conference, 14 May 1995) http://www.lds.org/ensign/1995/12/excerpts-from-recent-addresses-of-president-gordon-b-hinckley?lang=eng
“I think I can share this with you. As I sat in the
Tabernacle at the last conference and was sustained by the people of this church, there came before me in my mind’s eye, the picture of my mother when I was a little boy. And I’m sure she must have thought then that I wouldn't amount to much because I was not an easy little boy to deal with. I am grateful that I have the opportunity in my old age to bring honor to her name. …It’s been the mothers who have been the great carriers and purveyors of faith throughout the history of this church. I believe that with all my heart”
President Gordon B. Hinckley (Heber City/Springville, Utah, regional conference, 14 May 1995) http://www.lds.org/ensign/1995/12/excerpts-from-recent-addresses-of-president-gordon-bhinckley?lang=eng
One hundred years ago, President Joseph F.
Smith connected happiness directly to the family and admonished us to focus our efforts there. He said: “There can be no genuine happiness separate and apart from the home. … There is no happiness without service, and there is no
service greater than that which converts the home into a divine institution, and
which promotes and preserves family life.
… The home is what needs reforming” (Teachings
of Presidents of the Church: Joseph F.
Smith , 382, 384).
Elder M. Russell Ballard, Ensign, May 2012 “That the
Lost May Be Found” https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2012/04/that-the-lost-may-be-found?lang=eng
Joseph F. Smith said: “There can be no genuine happiness separate and apart from the home, and every effort made to sanctify and preserve its influence is uplifting to those who toil and sacrifice for its establishment. Men and women often seek to substitute some other life for that of the home; they would make themselves believe that the home means restraint; that the highest liberty is the fullest opportunity to move about at will. There is no happiness without service, and there is no service greater than that which converts the home into a divine institution, and which promotes and preserves family life” (Teachings of
Presidents of the Church: Joseph F.
Smith , 382).
A mother has far greater influence on her children than anyone else, and she must realize that every word she speaks, every act, every response, her attitude, even her appearance and manner of dress affect the lives of her children and the whole family. It is while the child is in the home that he gains from his mother the attitudes, hopes, and beliefs that will determine the kind of life he will live and the contribution he will make to society.
President N Eldon Tanner, No Greater Honor: The Woman’s
Role, New Era Jan 1977 http://www.lds.org/new-era/1977/01/no-greater-honor-the-womans-role?lang=eng
10 Ways to Spend Time with Children
Be at the Crossroads
Be a Real Friend
Read to Your Children
Pray with Your Children
Have Weekly Home Evenings
Be Together at Mealtimes
Read Scriptures Daily
Do Things as a Family
Teach Your Children
Truly Love Your Children http://fc.byu.edu/jpages/ee/w_etb87.htm
: A P
Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of: faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities. https://www.lds.org/topics/family-proclamation
Elder Russell M.
Nelson, Conference Report April
The way to create successful marriages and families is through faith in the Lord Jesus Christ.
Your happiness in this life and throughout eternity depends largely on whether you are “valiant in the
testimony of Jesus” (D&C
76:79; see also verses 51, 74,
True to the Faith p.179
As you remember the Savior and follow Him, you truly can be of good cheer. You can experience real, enduring peace at all times. You can find hope in the Savior’s first words to His disciples after
His Resurrection: “Peace be unto you” ( John 20:19).
True to the Faith p.114
Do you want your children to have self-esteem?
Listen simply to what the Lord has said.
“When we obey the commandments of the Lord and serve His children unselfishly, the natural consequence is power from God—power to do more than we can do by ourselves. Our insights, our talents, our abilities are expanded because we receive strength and power from the Lord. His power is a fundamental component to establishing a home filled with peace.”
-Richard G. Scott http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2013/04/for-peace-at-home?lang=eng
“If we love God, do His will, and fear His judgment more than men’s, we will have selfesteem.”
-Beware of Pride