Session 8
Communication
BE a real man – God’s Way
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The real man and...
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a friend
his devotion to God
prayer
his marriage
real husbanding
his wife’s sin
real understanding
communication
BE a real man – God’s Way
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“Consequently, faith comes from hearing the
message, and the message is heard through the word
of Christ.” (Romans 10:17, NIV84)
“With his mouth the godless destroys his neighbor,
but through knowledge the righteous escape.”
(Proverbs 11:9, NIV84)
“Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue
of the wise brings healing.” (Proverbs 12:18, NIV84)
“The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life, but a
deceitful tongue crushes the spirit.” (Proverbs 15:4,
NIV84)
BE a real man – God’s Way
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Verbal Communication
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Non Verbal Communication
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Circuit Jammers
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Love Languages
BE a real man – God’s Way
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Jim Burns, Creating an
Intimate Marriage: Rekindle
Romance Through Affection,
Warmth and Encouragement
BE a real man – God’s Way
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The process of sharing information with another
person in such a way that the sender’s message
is understood as he intended it.
Unless a the sender and receiver has come to a
common meaning, they have not communication
effectively
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Illustration
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(Wayne Mack, Your family God’s way)
BE a real man – God’s Way
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Be empathetic
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Listen
◦ Put yourself in her shoes
◦ Difficult to accept advice if other person not understand
◦ James 1:19 – Quick to hear, slow to speak, anger
◦ Reasons for listening in Proverbs
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15:31
18:13
18:15
19:20
21:28
Express your expectation
◦ Honesty, integrity, courage
BE a real man – God’s Way
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Need help? It is biblical
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Schedule communication times
◦ “For lack of guidance a nation falls, but many advisers
make victory sure.” (Proverbs 11:14, NIV84)
◦ Business/administrative/spiritual/dates
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Develop problem solving plan
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Find the real problem
List alternatives solutions
Select plan of action
Establish accountability
Set up evaluation procedure
BE a real man – God’s Way
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Wayne Mack, Your family
God’s way – Developing and
sustaining relationships in the
home
BE a real man – God’s Way
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Much overlooked
Eyes – way we look/don’t look at each other
Arms/hands
Dress
Body language (sit/stand)
Use of time – will show values
Laugh/don’t laugh
Willingness to help
BE a real man – God’s Way
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Know that...
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You are silently communicating
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Look angry but really only concentrating?
Look disinterested but actually listening?
Look bored but actually tired?
How do these affect the other person?
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You can benefit from paying attention
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You can misinterpret
◦ Be honest – deny envy when we look envious?
◦ Capture every thought, bring into obedience to Christ (2 Cor 10:5)
◦ Rabbi and the priest
BE a real man – God’s Way
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Wayne Mack, Your family
God’s way – Developing and
sustaining relationships in the
home
BE a real man – God’s Way
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Disparity between verbal/non verbal comms
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Overtalk
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“Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger,
◦ Monopolising, gossip, defensive speech, takeover
speech, motor mouth, badgering
◦ Sinful reasons: Pride, selfishness, control
◦ Non sinful reason: loneliness, poor listening
brawling and slander, along with every form of
malice. Be kind and compassionate to one
another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ
God forgave you.” (Ephesians 4:31–32, NIV84)
BE a real man – God’s Way
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Falsehood
◦ Lying, exaggeration, misrepresentation
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Unwholesome talk
◦ Sidetracking, verbal slamming, cancellation speech,
gunpowder speech, ventriloquist speech, final word
speech, excessive negative talk, mind-reading
speech, cotton candy
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Identify jammer:
◦ Prov 12:18, Prov 17:9, Prov 10:18, Prov 13:3
BE a real man – God’s Way
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Gary Chapman
BE a real man – God’s Way
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Words of affirmation
Tongue has power of life and death (Prov 18:21)
Appreciation, compliments, gratitude, affirmation when not present
Quality Time
Attention, togetherness, quality conversation, quality activities
Receiving Gifts
Physical, self
Acts of Service
House work, cooking, errands
Physical Touch
In passing, intimacy
The five love languages - Gary Chapman
BE a real man – God’s Way
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What does your spouse do (or fail to do) that
hurts you most deeply? Opposite of that is
probably your primary love language
What have you most often requested from
your spouse? That is probably your primary
love language
In what way do you regularly express love to
your spouse? That is most probably your
primary love language
BE a real man – God’s Way
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Your Family God’s Way. Developing and
sustaining relationships in the home – Wayne
Mack
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The Five Love Languages –
Gary Chapman
Creating an intimate marriage. Rekindle
romance through affection, warmth and
encouragement – Jim Burns
BE a real man – God’s Way
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?
BE a real man – God’s Way
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