WHAP
Comparative Essay
DIRECTIONS
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Part C
(Suggested planning and writing time – 35 minutes)
Percent of Section score – 33 1/3
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Directions: You are to answer the following
question.
You should spend 5 minutes organizing or outlining
your essay.
Write an essay that:
Has a relevant thesis and supports that thesis with
appropriate historical evidence.
Addresses all parts of the question.
Makes direct relevant comparisons.
Analyzes relevant reasons for similarities and
differences.
These directions are the
same for
EVERY comparative
essay.
CORE RUBRIC
The five (5) scoring areas only
• TH – Thesis
• ATQ – Addresses all parts of The Question
• EV – Evidence (9 for 2 points, 6 for 1 point)
• DC – Direct Comparison
• A – Analysis of a Direct Comparison
PROMPT or “QUESTION”
Compare the goals and outcomes of
the revolutionary process in TWO of
the following countries, beginning with
the dates specified.
• You need to do this verb: compare
‒ Similarities AND differences
 2 SIMS + 1 DIFF
 1 SIM + 2 DIFFs
• You need to compare TWO nouns
‒ Goals
Mexico
1910
China
1911
Russia
1917
‒ Outcomes
• You need to verb this noun
‒ Revolutionary process--not just the
revolutions but the process of
revolutions
TARGET & BRAINSTORM
Mexico
China
Goals  Overthrow the elite
 Overthrow monarch
 Republican form of government
 Nationalism
 Overthrown monarch
 Set up communist government or republic
(depending on the group)
Outcomes  Redistributed land to peasants
 Continued pressure from outside forces and ideas
(Japan, West, Marxism) keeps area in unrest
 Civil War in 1949 leads to Communist state
 Bolsheviks seize power after civil war with
whites
 Totalitarian government
 Communism
Revolutionary  Peasants…something…Diaz
Process  Pancho Villa leads to US coming to
 Overthrow of monarch
 1st wants western-style democracy—Sun YatSen
 Republic declared
 Long March
 Civil War between Mao Zedong and Chiang kaishek
 Ends in communist-totalitarian state
 Overthrow of monarch
 Republic (provisional government)
 Civil war leads to rise of
communism/totalitarian dictatorship
 Tries to spread revolution (3rd
international)
 Cultural revolution—anti-west
 Tiananmen Square
 Censorship to control western contact
 End foreign economic control
 nationalism
 Oil was nationalized
 Continued influence from others
(U.S.)
Mexico
Other Facts  U.S. interferes a lot
 NAFTA now?
Use the Target the Prompt
chart to make sure you unpack
the nouns and verbs with no
mistake.
Russia
Brainstorm to figure out
which two regions are
best for your essay.
• Which two do I have the most evidence for?
• What are the SIMs and DIFFs?
• What are REASONS for SIMs and DIFFs?
THESIS (TH)
MUST
• State the regions
• State the time period
• State the topic(s)
• Include 3 comparisons
• 2 SIMs + 1 DIFF
• 1 SIM + 2 DIFFs
• Use comparative cues
COMMON FORMULA
•
While/Although/Despite…
A + B were similar, A was
THIS, but B was THAT.
THESIS (TH)
MUST
• Be historically accurate
• Be specific with concrete
details
• Be clear, getting straight to
the point with firm diction
MUST NNNNOTS
NO VAGUE TIME: back in the day, long
ago, in ancient times,...
NO VAGUE NOUNS: things, stuff,
aspects, ways, they/them/ their, the
people,…
NO VAGUE QUALIFIERS: lots, a lot,
many, really, huge, very, like omg totally
COMMON FORMULA
•
While/Although/Despite…
A + B were similar, A was
THIS, but B was THAT.
NO ABSOLUTES: never, always, only
NO EMPTY LANGUAGE: I think, I’m
going to tell you, In this essay I will…
THESIS (TH)
MUST
• Be focused
• Place at beginning or end
• Be historically accurate
• Argue
‒
Someone should be able to
argue an alternate position
‒
Think opening statement a
lawyer makes to defend his
case
COMMON FORMULA
•
While/Although/Despite…
A + B were similar, A was
THIS, but B was THAT.
If you state it in your
thesis, you must
address it in the
essay.
Only say in your
essay what you can
tie back to your
thesis.
THESIS (TH)
MUST
• May need to be changed.
If so, make the change!
‒
‒
When you finish your essay,
reread with your thesis in
mind
If your thesis needs to be
tweaked, make any
changes necessary
• Some people “write their
way” to their thesis—
writing it last instead of
first. Nae problem. Do
what works for you.
MUST NNNNOTS
No extra anything in the intro—no
hook, no backstory—just drop the
THESIS and go.
No POV 1: we can see that, when we
study, our understanding of…
No POV 2: don’t use “you” at all. At all.
No rhetorical questions. Do not answer
a question as your thesis.
No listicles: do not turn your thesis into
a list. And while we’re on it, don’t turn
your essay into a listicle either.
THESIS EXAMPLE: REGIONS
Compare the formation of empires in any two classical civilizations:
the Mediterranean South Asia East Asia
While both the classical Roman and Han empires
centralized power and militarily expanded their frontiers,
Thesis Musts
• Regions specified
‒ Mediterranean (Rome)
‒ East Asia (Han)
the Roman Empire did not utilize a political philosophy
to structure and rule their empire while the Han
Emperors used a blend of Legalism and Confucianism.
‒ Analyzing only one
civilization within a
region is perfectly
acceptable.
THESIS EXAMPLE: TIME PERIOD
Compare the formation of empires in any two classical civilizations:
the Mediterranean South Asia
While both the classical Roman and Han empires
centralized power and militarily expanded their frontiers,
the Roman Empire did not utilize a political philosophy
to structure and rule their empire while the Han
Emperors used a blend of Legalism and Confucianism.
East Asia
Thesis Musts
• Regions specified
• Time period
‒ Prompt implies time
period by specifying the
empire formation period
and the classical period
‒ Most CB prompts,
however, will specify a
time period explicitly
THESIS EXAMPLE: TOPIC
Compare the formation of empires in any two classical civilizations:
the Mediterranean South Asia
While both the classical Roman and Han empires
centralized power and militarily expanded their
frontiers, the Roman Empire did not utilize a political
East Asia
Thesis Musts
• Regions specified
• Time period
• Topic specified
‒ Empire-building
philosophy to structure and rule their empire while the
Han Emperors used a blend of Legalism and
Confucianism.
‒ Centralizing power and
expanding are two ways
an empire gets built
THESIS EXAMPLE: SIMs & DIFFs
Compare the formation of empires in any two classical civilizations:
the Mediterranean South Asia
While both the classical Roman and Han empires
centralized power and militarily expanded their
frontiers, the Roman Empire did not utilize a political
East Asia
Thesis Musts
• Regions specified
• Time period
• Topic specified
• SIMs (1) and DIMs
philosophy to structure and rule their empire while the
‒ Both centralized power
Han Emperors used a blend of Legalism and
‒ Both expanded
militarily
Confucianism.
THESIS EXAMPLE: SIMs & DIFFs
Compare the formation of empires in any two classical civilizations:
the Mediterranean South Asia
While both the classical Roman and Han empires
centralized power and militarily expanded their frontiers,
the Roman Empire did not utilize a political
East Asia
Thesis Musts
• Regions specified
• Time period
• Topic specified
• SIMs and DIFFs (2)
philosophy to structure and rule their empire while
the Han Emperors used a blend of Legalism and
Confucianism.
‒ used or didn’t use
philosophy as an
empire-forming political
tool
THESIS EXAMPLE: COMPARATIVES
Compare the formation of empires in any two classical civilizations:
the Mediterranean South Asia
While both the classical Roman and Han empires
centralized power and militarily expanded their frontiers,
the Roman Empire did not utilize a political philosophy
East Asia
Thesis Musts
• Regions specified
• Time period
• Topic specified
• SIMs and DIFFs (3 total)
to structure and rule their empire while the Han
Emperors used a blend of Legalism and Confucianism.
• Comparative cues
‒ and, both
‒ while
THESIS EXAMPLE: ALL TOGETHER
Compare the formation of empires in any two classical civilizations:
the Mediterranean South Asia
While both the classical Roman and Han empires
centralized power and militarily expanded their
frontiers, the Roman Empire did not utilize a political
East Asia
Thesis Musts
• Regions specified
• Time period
• Topic specified
• SIMs and DIFFs (3 total)
philosophy to structure and rule their empire while
the Han Emperors used a blend of Legalism and
Confucianism.
• Comparative cues
ADRESSES THE QUESTION (ATQ)
MUST
• Address both SIMs and
DIFFs—at least 3 total
‒
2 SIMs and 1 DIFF
‒
1 SIM and 2 DIFFs
• Establish concrete, valid
comparisons based on
accurate history
• Crafting your essay
around three (3) DCs
ensures ATQ points are
automatically addressed
MUST NNNNOTS
• Address only SIMs and no DIFFs
• Address only DIFFs and no SIMs
EVIDENCE (EV)
MUST
• Be real: dates, events, people, laws, monumental architecture,
quotes—anything concrete fact that helps to prove the DC, and
therefore your THESIS.
• Be RELEVANT and ACCURATE
• Follow the “Rule of 3”
‒
3 bits of evidence supporting each DC
‒
3x3=9
‒
Give 9 specific evidence for full points
‒
Give 6 specific evidence for partial points
DIRECT COMPARISON (DC)
MUST
• Establish a concrete, valid
comparison of SIM/DIFF
based on accurate history
using comparative cue glue.
‒
also, as well, both, shared, in
addition, like, similarly, too
‒
however, on the other hand,
conversely, differently, in
contrast, either, neither, in
opposition to, unlikely, in
contrast to, unlike, while…
• Create three (3) per essay.
DIRECT COMPARISON (DC)
DO NOT
• Settle for comparisons that
are indirect, implied, “antifacts”
‒
i.e., This happened here.
This happened there.
• See the DC chart you already
got in class   
ANALYSIS (DC-A)
MUST
• Explain the reason for a SIM/DIFF…
why w-h-y WHY!?!
• Explain cause AND effect.
• Ideally, explain why and then explain
why the why.
• Comparative cue words
‒
because, led to, caused by,
affected, impacted, came from,
was due to, in order to
• Avoid circular reasoning—supporting
a statement by simply repeating the
statement in different or stronger
terms.
‒
X is true because of Y. Y is true
because of X.
Research credits
Ms. Jackson’s Teaching Experience
The Internet
2,085 Facebooking History Teachers,
especially and C. Meier and Stacey Jackson (yep-another Jackson!)