Feedback for “America Needs It’s Nerds”
- Pay attention to short sentences “Enough is enough.”
-The answer to rhetorical questions often lead you to the author’s claim or atleast re-emphasize it.
-Avoid making “Water Is Wet” statements.
-Your job is to analyze not evaluate.
-Don’t be afraid to take on the author’s argument in “chronological order.”
-Don’t say “low - key” and avoid informal language
-If you are going to talk about tone, make sure your give multiple examples of diction and you
explain how the tone contributes to message/meaning.
-Mosts 8s and 9s are two and a half pages in length. They also deal with the argument in a holistic
sense.
Shoutouts:
2nd Block
-High Score - Lauryn Highsmith (7/8)
-Amazing topic sentence for her first body paragraph - Dani S.
-Great introduction and depth of analysis - Vanessa Fay
-Amazing conclusion! - Madeline
-Sharon Harris - Phenomenal analysis of all examples (particularly Harvard example).
-Great analysis of teacher pay and prestige - Kayla
-Perfect body paragraphs - Lauryn Highsmith
-Strong Intro that doesn’t mention devices - George
-First body paragraph and connection of analysis to argument - Mohamad
3rd Block
-High Score - Izzy (8) and Karima (8) - Karima’s is a more traditional 8 and Izzy’s is more of a
unicorn.
-Amazing opening sentence - Ashlee George
-Nice combination of style and great analysis - Izzy
-Thorough and insightful analysis throughout - Brian
-Great balance of direct and indirect references to the text - Kenzie
-Great transition between first and second body paragraph - Brittany C.
-Owen’s handwriting improved tremendously, and he did a good job of focusing on the repetition of
important words and phrases.
-Good conclusion - Zac
-Great opening statement and essay in general - Kaycie Dotson
-Karima answered the so what question so well in her conclusion that I wanted to give her a 9.
Missed Opportunities:
- Some of you would mention the writer’s diverse use of examples and only mention two and write
one body paragraph about this.
-The fact that this was written in 1990 - engaging with this would help you answer the “so what”
question.
-Enough is enough.