THE 3x3 WRITING
PROCESS
6 - 28
The Complete Process
1. Prewriting
u Analyze
u Anticipate
u Adapt
6 - 29
The Complete Process
1. Prewriting
u Analyze
u Anticipate
u Adapt
2. Writing
u Research
u Organize
u Compose
6 - 30
The Complete Process
1. Prewriting
u Analyze
u Anticipate
u Adapt
2. Writing
u Research
u Organize
u Compose
3. Revising
u Revise
u Proofread
u Evaluate
6 - 31
1. Prewriting
u
u
u
Analyze: Define your purpose. Select
the most appropriate form (channel).
Visualize the audience.
Anticipate: Put yourself in the reader’s
position and predict his or her reaction
to this message.
Adapt: Consider ways to shape the
message to benefit the reader, using his
or her language.
6 - 32
2. Writing
u
u
u
Research: Collect data formally and
informally. Generate ideas by
brainstorming and clustering.
Organize: Group ideas into a list or an
outline. Select the direct or indirect
strategy.
Compose: Write first draft, preferably
on a computer.
6 - 33
3. Revising
u
u
u
Revise: Revise for clarity, tone,
conciseness, and vigor. Revise to
improve readability.
Proofread: Proofread to verify spelling,
grammar, punctuation, and format.
Check for overall appearance.
Evaluate: Ask yourself whether the final
product will achieve its purpose.
6 - 34
Business Communication: Process and Product, Mary Ellen Guffey, South-Western.
6-1
Activity 1:
Revising for Clarity, Conciseness, Vigor and Readability
Keep it simple.
Keep it conversational.
Remove opening fillers.
Eliminate redundancies.
Reduce compound prepositions.(减少复合介词）
Purge empty words.
Kick the noun habit.
Dump trite “business” phrases.
Develop parallelism (balanced construction).
Apply graphic highlighting.
Measure readability.
6-2
Revising for Clarity: Keep it simple.
•
Avoid foggy, indirect, pompous(华而不实)
language.
– Poor:
It would not be inadvisable for you to affix your
signature at this point in time.
– Improved:
You may sign now.
6-3
Revising for Clarity: Keep it conversational
u
Avoid artificial or formal expression.Avoid
legal terminology, technical words, and thirdperson constructions.
– Formal:
Our Accounting Department takes this opportunity
to inform you that we have credited your account
for the aforementioned sum.
– Conversational:
Your account has been credited for $100.
6-4
Revising for Conciseness: Remove the
opening filler.
u
u
Wordy:
There are four new menu items
we must promote.
Improved:
We must promote four new menu
items.
6-5
Revising for Conciseness: Eliminate the
redundancy
u
Redundancies mean unnecessary
repetition. For example:
– collect together
– contributing factor
– personal opinion
– perfectly clear
6-6
More examples for redundancies
• past memories
• various differences
• each individual
• basic fundamentals
• true facts
• important essentials
• future plans
• terrible tragedy
• end result
• final outcome
• free gift
• past history
• unexpected surprise
• sudden crisis
Revising for Conciseness: Reduce
Compound Prepositions.
u
A compound preposition is formed when two or
more words are combined and considered a
single prepositional unit. For example:
– at such time, at which time
when
– due to the fact that, inasmuch as
because
6-7
Revising for Conciseness: Purge empty
words.
u
Empty words/phrases (虚词）are those
convey no meaning.
– As for the area of athletic shoes, the degree of
profits sagged.
– This is to inform you that we have a toll-free
service line.
– Not all students who are registered will attend.
6-8
u
As for the field of athletic shoes, the
degree of profits sagged.
u
This is to inform you that we have a tollfree service line.
u
Not all students who are registered will
attend. registered
6-9
Revising for Vigor : Kick the noun
habit.
u
u
Wordy:
We must conduct an investigation of all
parking violations before we can give
consideration to your fine.
Improved:
We must investigate all parking
violations before we can consider your
fine.
6 - 10
Revising for Vigor: Dump trite
Business phrases
u
u
Trite:
Pursuant to your request, enclosed please
find a job application.
Improved:
As requested, we have enclosed a job
application.
6 - 11
Revising for Readability: Develop
Parallelism
Not parallel:
We can collect information, store
it, and later it can be updated.
Parallel:
We can collect, store, and update
information.
6 - 12
Revising for Readability: Apply
graphic highlighting
u
u
u
u
Letters, such as (a) and (b) within the text.
Numerals, like 1, 2, and 3, listed vertically.
Bullets, like *
Headings and print options
•
•
•
•
•
CAPITAL LETTERS
underscores
boldface
italics
font size
6 - 13
Measure readability.
Apply a readability test such as
Gunning's Fog Index.
6 - 14
Applying the Fog Index to
Determine Readability
u
u
u
u
u
u
u
u
Select the passage.
Count the total words.
Count the sentences.
Find the average sentence length.
Count the number of long words.
Find the percentage of long words.
Add the results.
Multiply.
6 - 15
Select the passage.*
u
Choose a continuous passage of
between 100 and 130 words.
6 - 16
*See the Sample Letter, slides 6-25 to 6-27.
Count the total words.
u
Count numbers, dates, and abbreviations
separately.
u
Our letter sample has 110 words.
6 - 17
Count the sentences.
u
Count all independent clauses separately.
u
For example, He applied and he was
hired counts as two sentences.
u
Our sample has seven sentences,
marked with superscript numbers.
6 - 18
Find the average sentence length.
u
u
Divide the total number of words by the
number of sentences.
110 7 = 16 words
6 - 19
Count the number of long words.
A word is long if it has three or more syllables.
 Exclude:
Capitalized words
Compound words formed from short words
(nevertheless)
Verbs made into three syllables by the
addition of -ed, or -es (located, finances)
 In our sample sentences the long words are
underlined.

6 - 20
Find the percentage of long words.
u
u
Divide the number of long words by the
number of total words.
10 110 = .09 or 9 percent
6 - 21
Add the results.
u
Add the average sentence length (16)
and the percentage of long words (9).
u
The result is 25.
6 - 22
Multiply.
u
Multiply by 0.4
u
25 x 0.4 = 10
u
The reading level of this letter is 10.
6 - 23
Sample Letter
6 - 24
Sample Letter
Dear Mrs. Lawrence:
1Yes,
I can meet with you Thursday,
April 3, at 10 a.m. to discuss possible
ways to finance the purchase of a new
home in San Diego. 2Before we meet,
though, you might like to consider two
possible plans.
6 - 25
Sample Letter
3The
first plan finances your purchase
with a swing loan, which has a fixed
interest rate for a short period of time. 4A
second plan requires you to refinance
your present residence. 5We have
located five programs from three different
institutions that would do this. 6Enclosed
is a summary of these five plans.
6 - 26
Sample Letter
7I
look forward to seeing you Thursday
to find a way for you to own a home in
San Diego.
Sincerely,
6 - 27
Activity 2:
What to Watch for in Proofreading
u
u
u
u
u
Spelling
Grammar
Punctuation
Names and numbers
Format
6 - 35
How to Proofread Routine Documents
u
u
For computer messages, read on the
screen in WYSIWYG mode (what you
see is what you get) or, better, print a
rough copy to read.
For handwritten or printed messages,
read carefully and use proofreading
marks to indicate changes.
6 - 40
How to Proofread Complex Documents
u
u
u
u
u
u
Print a copy, preferably double-spaced.
Set it aside for a breather.
Allow adequate time for careful proofreading.
Be prepared to find errors. Congratulate, not
criticize, yourself each time you find an error!
Read the message at least twice – for meaning
and for grammar/mechanics.
Reduce your reading speed. Focus on
individual words.
6 - 41
Basic Proofreader’s Marks
Delete
Capitalize
Lowercase (don’t capitalize)
Transpose
Close up
6 - 36
Basic Proofreader’s Marks
Insert
Insert space
Insert punctuation
Insert period
Start paragraph
6 - 37
Marked Copy
This is to inform you that beginning september 1
the doors leading to the Westside of the building
will have alarms. Because of the fact that these
exits also function as fire exits they can not actually
be locked consequently we are instaling alrams.
Please utilize the east side exists to avoid setting
off the ear piercing alarms.
6 - 38
Marked Copy
This is to inform you that beginning september 1
the doors leading to the Westside of the building
will have alarms. Because of the fact that these
doors
exits also function as fire exits they can not actually
l
be locked consequently we are instaling alrams.
use
Please utilize the east side exists to avoid setting
off the ear piercing alarms.
6 - 38
Revised Copy
Beginning September 1 the doors leading to the
west side of the building will have alarms.
Because these doors also function as fire exits,
they cannot be locked; consequently, we are
installing alarms. Please use the east side exits to
avoid setting off the ear-piercing alarms.
6 - 39
Activity 3:
Evaluating the Outcome
u
u
u
u
How successful will this communication
be?
Does the message say what you want it
to say?
Will it achieve its purpose?
Did you encourage feedback so that you
will know whether it succeeded?
6 - 42
Wordy Memo – Poor
Document for Analysis 6.1
“Before” Version
6 - 43
Activity 6.1 “Before”
To: All Management
This memo is addressed to all members of management to
advise you that once a year we like to remind management of
our policy in relation to the matter of business attire. In this
policy there is a recommendation that all employees should
wear clothing that promotes a businesslike atmosphere and
meets requirements of safety.
Employees who work in offices and who, as part of their jobs,
meet the public and other outsiders should dress in a
professional manner, including coat, tie, suit, slacks, dress, and
so forth. In areas of industrial applications, supervisors may
prohibit loose clothing (shirt tails, ties, cuffs) that could become
entangled in machinery that moves.
6 - 44
Activity 6.1 “Before”
Where it is necessary, footwear should protect against heavy
objects or sharp edges at the level of the floor. In the
manufacturing and warehousing areas, prohibited footwear
includes the following: shoes that are open toe, sandals, shoes
made of canvas or nylon, tennis shoes, spiked heels higher than
1 1/2 inches.
Each and every manager has the responsibility for the
determination of suitable business attire, and employees should
be informed of what is required.
6 - 45
Wordy Memo – Improved
Document for Analysis 6.1
“After” Version
6 - 46
Activity 6.1 “After”
To: All Management
Once a year we like to remind you of our policy regarding
business attire. All employees should wear clothing that
promotes a businesslike atmosphere and meets safety
requirements.
Office employees who meet the public should dress
professionally, including coat, tie, suit, slacks, dress, and so
forth. In industrial areas, supervisors may prohibit loose
clothing (shirt tails, ties, cuffs) that could become entangled in
moving machinery.
6 - 47
Activity6.1 “After”
Where necessary, footwear should protect against heavy
objects or sharp edges at floor level. In the manufacturing and
warehousing areas, prohibited footwear includes the following:
open-toe shoes, sandals, shoes made of canvas or nylon, tennis
shoes, and heels higher than 1 1/2 inches.
Every manager is responsible for determining suitable
business attire and for informing employees of what is required.
6 - 48
Copy With Proofreading Marks
Document for Analysis 6.2
6 - 49
Document for Analysis 6.2
Dear Ms. Willis,
We appreciate yourinterest in employeeleasing through
U.S. Staff Network. Our programs and our service hasve
proved to be powerful management tools for business
owners, like you.
s
Our seventeen-year history, Ms. Williams,
providesthe
s to offer the best
local service and national strength neccesary
employee- leasing programs available,. we save business
owners time, and money, employee hassles,and employer
liability.
6 - 50
Document for Analysis 6.2
e
Your employees' will receive health care benifits,
retirement plan choices,and a national credit union. As a
n
small business owner you can eliminate personel
#
n
administration., Which involves alot of goverment
paperwork today.
1 or 1,000 employees and offer no
Whether you have one
benefits to a full-benefits package ,employee leasing will get
you back to the basics of running your business more
profitably. I will call you to arrange a time to meet, and talk
about your specific needs.
Cordially,
6 - 51
Revision of Letter – Poor
“Before” Version - Activity 6.3
6 - 52
“Before” Version - Activity 6.3
Dear Mr. Sato:
Pursuant to your request, the undersigned is transmitting to you
herewith the attached materials and documents with regard to the
improvement of security in your business. To insure the
improvement of security of your after-hours security, you should
initially make a decision with regard to exactly what you
contemplate must have protection. You are, in all probability,
apprehensive not only about your electronic equipment and
paraphernalia but also about your company records, information, and
data.
6 - 53
“Before” Version - Activity 6.3
Inasmuch as we feel you will want to obtain protection for both
your equipment and data, we will make suggestions for taking a
number of judicious steps to inhibit crime. First and foremost, we
recommend that you install defensive lighting. A consultant for
lighting, currently on our staff, can design both outside and inside
lighting, which brings me to my second point. Exhibit security signs,
due to the fact that nonprofessional thieves are often as not deterred
by posted signs on windows and doors. As my last and final
recommendation, you should install space alarms, which are sensors
that look down over the areas that are to receive protection, and
activate bells or additional lights, thus scaring off intruders.
6 - 54
“Before” Version - Activity 6.3
After reading the enclosed materials, please call me to further
discuss the protection of your business.
Sincerely,
6 - 55
“Before” Version - Activity 6.3
Computing the Fog Index
The letter shown has a reading level of 17.2.
Here's how the reading level was computed:
u
u
u
u
u
u
u
u
Total words in passage
Number of sentences
Number of long words
Average sentence length
Percentage of long words
Add the results
Multiply by .04
Reading level/Fog Index
208
9
41
(2089 = 23)
(41 208 = .20)
(0.4 x 43 = 17.2)
23
20
43
17.2
17.2
6 - 56
Revision of Letter - Improved
“After” Version -Activity 6.3
6 - 57
“After” Version - Activity 6.3
Dear Mr. Sato:
At your request, I am sending you the attached materials
regarding improving security in your business. To improve
your after-hours security, you should first decide what must
be protected. You are probably concerned about your
electronic equipment and about company data.
6 - 58
“After” Version - Activity 6.3
Because we feel you will want to protect both
equipment and data, we can suggest a number of prudent
steps to deter crime. First, install defensive lighting. Our
lighting expert can design both outside and inside lighting.
Second, post security signs. Amateur thieves are often
deterred by signs on windows and doors. Finally, install
space alarms. These sensors look down over the areas that
are being protected. The sensors can activate bells or
lights, thus scaring off intruders.
6 - 59
“After” Version - Activity 6.3
After reading the enclosed materials, please call me to
further discuss protecting your business.
Sincerely,
6 - 60
“After” Version - Activity 6.3
Revised Fog Index Reading Level
u
u
u
u
u
u
u
Total words
134
Number of sentences
12
Number of long words
19
Average sentence length
(134  12 =) 11
Percentage of long words
(19  134 =) .14
Add
25
Multiply by .04 (25 x .04 =) reading level: 10.0
6 - 61
End
6 - 62
End
6 - 62