Style Lesson 3: Actions

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This chapter focuses on VERBS
Williams suggests that writers think of
sentences as stories with characters
(subjects) and actions (verbs).
 Simple
subject
 Whole subject
 Character
 Action
 Verb
The evidence that you offer is not reliable.
Back in elementary school, we learned that
the subject of the sentence was the doer
of an action and the verb of a sentence
was the action.
Jane jumps. = subject verb (doer/character
action)
But the doer (character) isn’t always the
subject of a sentence. Any noun can be
the subject of the sentence.
Jane’s jumping went on and on.
Jumping went = subject verb
Jane is the doer (or character) but jumping
is the subject of the sentence.
The main action isn’t always the main verb
of a sentence. Often the action has been
changed into a noun.
Jane’s jumping went on and on.
Jumps becomes jumping and went
becomes the main verb of the sentence.
Williams suggests we return to the idea that
doers=subjects and important actions=verbs.
Even complex academic prose will be more
clear and more powerful if we make doers
(what Williams calls characters) the subjects of
our sentences and if we make actions the verbs
of our sentences.
Make your main character the subject of
your sentence.
More on this principle in Lesson 4
Make the important actions the verbs of
your sentence.
The director completed a review of the
data.
Vs.
The directed reviewed the data.
First drafts often have important actions as
nouns
Often this action has been changed into a
noun. Nominalization (or nounialization)
is a noun derived from an action.
(It is also a noun derived from an adjective.
Careless becomes carelessness. More on
this problem in Lesson4.)
Actions become nouns:
Discover becomes discovery.
Resist becomes resistance.
React becomes reaction.
Character + actions become nouns
(gerund):
She flies becomes her flying.
We sing becomes our singing.
Some verbs are, without any change,
positioned as nouns:
Hope (verb) becomes hope (noun)
Result (verb) becomes result (noun)
Repair (verb) becomes repair (noun)
What is the simple subject and verb of this
sentence?
Ignoring introductory phrases, underline the
first eight words in a sentence.
a) Do you have an abstract noun (especially a
nominalization) as the simple subject?
b) Do you have 6 or 7 words before you get to a
verb?
“Yes” means your sentence may need revising.
1)
2)
Decide who your main characters are
Decide what actions these main
characters perform (look especially to
those nominalizations, those actions
that became nouns)
New sentence parts:
1. Corporations outsource high-tech work to Asia
2. Many Americans loose jobs
3) Use conjunctions (because, if, when, although, why,
how, whether, that, since, so long as, provided that) to
make the logic of the relationships clear
The problem was the topic of our discussion.
 Nominalizations
with “empty verbs” or
“bland verbs” such as to be (is, are, were)
to seem, to have, to do
 Nominalizations following “There is” and
“There are”
 Multiple nominalizations in a sentence
 Your
sentences are more concrete and thus
more powerful (nominalization results in
abstract, vague nouns)
 Your sentences will be shorter and thus more
direct since they will be free of unnecessary
verbiage.
 The logic of the relationship of the ideas will be
more clear.
 You sentences will tell a more coherent story.
Williams does thinks some nouns derived
from verbs do useful work and shouldn’t
be rewritten. 37-38
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