A testimony is a spiritual witness and assurance given by the Holy Ghost. To bear testimony is to give a simple, direct
declaration of belief- a feeling, an assurance, a conviction of gospel truth. Sharing your testimony often is one of the most
powerful ways of inviting the spirit. For your testimony to have convincing power, you must be sincere. President Monson
said: “Regarding one's testimony, remember, that which one willingly shares he keeps, while that which he selfishly keeps
he loses.” The Holy Ghost plays an essential role in gaining a testimony. In the new testament the Apostle Paul taught
“that no man can say that Jesus is the Lord, but by the Holy Ghost.” (1Cor 12:3) How do we gain a testimony? For me, one
thing that helped me feel the spirit was putting a lot of focus and attention on Heavenly Father and trying to understand
what He is like. So for me it was pondering. Pondering brings revelation. Also the righteous examples of others can create a
strong desire within yourself to want to be closer to the Lord. The closer we come to God, the more we feel His perfect
love. Barbara Thompson, who was recently released as second counselor in the relief society general presidency said: “They
way to receive personal revelation is really quite clear. We need to desire to receive revelation, we must not harden our
hearts, and then we need to ask in faith, truly believe that we will receive an answer, and then diligently keep the
commandments of God.” While preparing this talk, a part that stood out to me was when she said: “Truly believe that we
will receive an answer.” I've noticed stories throughout the scriptures that teach that we must have faith to receive. An
example is when the blind men came unto Jesus, and Jesus said unto them “Believe ye that I am able to do this? They said
unto Him yea Lord. Then touched He their eyes saying: According to your faith be it unto you.” (Matthew 9:28-29) They
had to believe it would happen. That's faith! In the book of Ether, Moroni interrupts the account a few times to teach us
principles for our benefit. He teaches us about faith. “And neither at any time hath any wrought miracles until after their
faith; wherefore they first believed in the Son of God. And there were many whose faith was so exceedingly strong, even
before Christ came, who could not be kept from within the veil, but truly saw with their eyes the things which they had
beheld with an eye of faith, and they were glad. And behold, we have seen in this record that one of these was the brother
of Jared; for so great was his faith in God, that when God put forth his finger He could not hide it from the sight of the
brother of Jared, because of his word which he had spoken unto him, which word he had obtained by faith.” (Ether 12:1820) We don't receive a witness until “after the trial of [our] faith!” (Ether 12:27) So just what is faith? Faith is taking the
first step even when you don't see the whole staircase. Faith is taking a step into darkness and expecting the light to follow.
Faith is a principle of power. God works by power, but His power is usually exercised in response to faith. I would say the
greatest thing that has ever happened to me is being taught by my mission president. I just want to share a bit of my
feelings for this great man, and share what I have learned through his diligence. When I first got off the plane to NY, I was
greeted by President and Sister Bulloch. President Bulloch came up to us with such vigor and enthusiasm and shook our
hands with the most real and whole-hearted energetic grin and said: “WELL HELLO BROTHEREN!!!! HOW ARE YA???”I felt
so happy and important. His greeting rose my spirit and I could feel he had a strong spirit with him. That was one of his
talents. He could just walk in the room and the spirit would just fill the atmosphere. I have never been with a person who
could do that. He worked so hard most of his life to obtain the word as quoted in D&C 11:21 and strengthen his testimony
diligently so that others could feel the powerful influence of the spirit. Many times Sister Bulloch would say: “President
Bulloch practices what he preaches.” My feelings are so full for this man. He is a master at the scriptures and a powerful
teacher so that “he that preacheth and he that receiveth, understand one another, and both are edified and rejoice
together.” (D&C 50:22) No one has deeply affected my soul and lively awakened my spirit as much as this great man. He
has helped me feel true joy and see the reality of how God really is. When you get these principles, you are excited and
enthusiastic! He knows the scriptures and can teach them in such a way that the Spirit quickly fills your soul and opens your
mind to new things that have never been pondered before. One of my favorite scriptures says: “Verily, Verily, I say unto
you I will impart unto you of my spirit, which shall enlighten your mind, which shall fill your soul with joy.” (D&C 11:13) I
definitely have felt Gods love and learned His ways through this man. It makes me wonder about the prophets like Moses,
Joseph Smith, and even Jesus. He has taught missionaries powerfully that God is your Father. He loves you. He has
designed a perfect plan for you to be happy. He has taught us to first seek to obtain the word because it is written that way
in D&C 11:21. He has then told us that we need to obtain the blessings and guidance of the spirit. The spirit can, and only
will testify of truth. And that is how the people are converted. It is not through elaborate and lengthy wording. It is by
short, concise language, so that the person can understand, and then the spirit can bear witness to them that what they are
hearing is true. The spirit will not testify to confusion, it will not bear witness to superficiality, and it will not bear witness to
phoniness. Missionaries need to get it in their heads so that they can teach simply and clearly. We want to create an
environment where the spirit can be present, so that it can testify of all the truth that is said. Without the spirit, no one
would know any truth. In D&C 93:24 it says: “And truth is a knowledge of things as they are, and as they were, and as
they are to come.” Knowing President has motivated me to work harder to keep the spirit with me so others can feel of it
immediately. He has told us over and over again that “Telling isn't teaching, and having been told isn't taught.” He
demonstrated that by having two desks and two missionaries with their backs turned so they couldn't see each other. He
had one missionary build a construction of something creative out of wooden blocks. Then step by step had the other
missionary tell the other one what to do. And through instruction, the missionary guided the other one throughout the
block building process so that hopefully they would be identical. When they turned around it didn't look anything close to
what the other one was building. When he said: “Grab the smaller rectangular piece,” there were 3 or 4 different smaller
rectangular pieces, he didn't know which one he was talking about. Telling isn't teaching and having been told isn't taught.
Another principle missionaries in the New York Utica Mission have been taught is to put away childish things. In 1
Corinthians 13:11 it says:“When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I
became a man, I put away childish things.” He also has taught us to plan effectively. Plan your work, then work your plan!
Teach effectively, work diligently, and open your mouth. He has told us to improve in every way and to remember that “The
difference between the successful and the unsuccessful, is that the successful do what the unsuccessful don't like doing.”
He has also taught us that “If we do what you've always done, then you'll get what you've always got.” As missionaries we
have to fight through some bad days to earn some of the best days of our life. But in the end it is all worth it. It was nice to
go to the Palmyra temple and to take a tour around all the church sites. That's one of the Utica traditions in the Mission.
One of the things I had to learn on my own is to accept myself. If I didn't learn to accept myself early, then its going to be
a hard and rough ride until you do. A mistake I habitually made in my early missionary days and even before my mission,
was so constantly compare, and to be upset with myself for not being where I saw others at. That is such a foolish thing to
do. I had a companion from Arizona who taught me to not care what other people think. There is a quote that says: “If you
care what other people think, you will always be their prisoner.” I believe that is true. I have found out that its ok if you are
not there yet. You will be someday. We just need to stay patient with ourselves and remember that God loves us and is
thrilled with any kind progress that we have. One of the most exciting trainings President Bulloch shared was about light. He
really hit hard on the importance of obtaining and increasing our light. I have learned as a missionary, that I really do want
the light. Darkness is nothing. It has nothing. And will ever be nothing. In D&C it says “That which is of God is light, and he
that receiveth light and continueth in God, receiveth more light, and that light groweth brighter and brighter until the
perfect day. And I say it that you may know the truth, that you many chase darkness from among you. That which doth not
edify is not of God, and is darkness.” Brothers and Sisters, every choice we make either invites light, or it chases it away.
Everything we do effects the light. The wicked one, the advesary, is trying to do all he can to steal light. He's a light thief!
Darkness can not come in where light exists. Everything effects the light. Have you ever met somebody who is just filled
with the spirit, and it just gushes out, and you get a little splashed on? Its just bubbling out? “Nothing touches the soul but
leaves its impress, and thus, little by little, we are fashioned into the image of all we have seen and heard, known and
meditated. And if we learn to live with all that is fairest and purest and best, the love of it all, will in the end, become our
life.” (David B. Haight)
Darkness is the absence of light. Coldness is the absence of warmth. Our testimonies build by light. Our faith builds by light.
That which we feed the most, grows the most. If we feed our pride, it will grow and overtake us. If we feed love, that will
grow, and we will be closer to the Savior. Our soul is like a paper cup, and every time we read our scriptures, take the
sacrament, visit a sick friend or family member, turn away from evil, or share our testimony, water is poured into the cup
and rises higher and higher. The water is the light which each of us want to obtain. But as we break a commandment,
gratify our pride, or yield to the enticings of Satan, toothpicks poke holes in our cup, and streams of water shoot out, and
then we are draining. We will always be bombarded by the media and it will automatically poke holes in us and will
decrease our spirituality. We live in a natural and fallen state. We cant always avoid the world and the wickedness that is
around us. But what we can do, it to work hard to gain light, so that we are filling up faster, than what is coming out. The
light adds to more light and then we become something and not nothing. But if we fall away and decrease our spirituality,
we will eventually become nothing if we don't turn around. Repentance is everything. The Old Testament was originally
written in Hebrew, and the word used in it to refer to the concept of repentance is shube, which means to turn, or to
change directions. The Savior is saying, “you're going the wrong way! Turn around and come back to me!” And repentance
will increase our light, and Heavenly Father loves to see that. The Lord wants to see humility, and wants to see our faith. He
said: “If ye have faith, and doubt not, ye shall say unto this mountain be thou removed, it shall be done.” Church
attendance increases testimony because of how the church is set up, we can build testimony in our classes as we teach
”one another the doctrine of the kingdom.” A word taught to me that I love is Synergism which means that the total effect
is greater than the sum of the individual effects. Synergism comes from the Greek word synergia which means “working
together.” So when everyone contributes the total outcome is higher and greater than what we could come up with
individually. That is why the Lord says in Doctrine and Covenants to “let not all be spokesmen at once, but let one speak at
a time and let all listen unto his sayings that when all have spoken that all may be edified of all and that every man may
have an equal privilege. As each of us participates, we create an environment that bring revelation. I know this is true! Over
these last two years my testimony has been strengthened. The missionaries have been asked to study mormon.org and to
create a profile. I would like to share what I have published to you. It says: “I love sharing the gospel. I do have faith in our
Savior and am very grateful for His Atonement in my life. I see God as our happy best friend who spends all of His energy
trying to help, inspire, and bless us. Heber C. Kimball said: 'I am perfectly satisfied that my Father and my God is a cheerful,
pleasant, lively, and good-natured being. Why? Because I am cheerful, pleasant, lively and good-natured when I have His
spirit....and that arises from the perfection of His attributes. He is a jovial, lively person, and a beautiful man.' In a
mormon.org video by Kevin Federson, I like a line that he states that says: 'I think a misconception that I had that a lot of
people had, is that God is just boring. It's through skateboarding and remaining prayerful that I've found out the complete
opposite. I realize He's given us everything that we love. Every crazy color, feelings, emotions, rushes, adrenalin,
everything that inspires you, gets you pumped and excited, is directly from Him.' I love the book of Mormon and I
encourage everybody to read it and pray about it. It has so much spiritual strength that can help us see the reality, and true
vision of life! I know that God lives. I know he is real. I know that He is accessible to all who seek Him. He is closer than we
realize. More closer than we know. He has called another prophet to the earth to help us become like Him. Our purpose
here is to grow up to be like our Father. God's life is a lifestyle, and a way of living. He desires us to be a part of that and to
enjoy all the full benefits and blessings that come with obedience. Jeffrey R. Holland said: 'The thing God enjoys most about
being God is the thrill of being merciful, especially to those who don't expect it and often feel they don't deserve it.' I know
that God loves us with a perfect love. And because He loves us, He called Joseph Smith as a prophet. In Numbers it says:
'And he said hear now my words; if there be a prophet among you, I the Lord will make myself known unto him in a vision
and will speak unto him in a dream.' I love that scripture and was so excited when I found it!” :) It backs up the restoration
and shows that that is how God works. President Uchtdorf has taught that “revelation and testimony do not always come
with overwhelming force. For many, a testimony comes slowly-a piece at a time.” Barbara Thompson continues to say that
“Our testimonies fortify us and strengthen us as we face challenges in our daily lives. It is our testimony, combined with our
faith in Jesus Christ and our knowledge of the plan of salvation, which helps us get through trial and hardship. Because we
have a strong testimony, it doesn't mean it will always remain that way. We must nourish and strengthen it in order that it
will have sufficient power to sustain us.” In the book of Isaiah, the Lord teaches us that “precept must be upon precept,
precept upon precept, line upon line, line upon line, here a little, and there a little.”(Isaiah 28:10) One of my thoughts is,
will my children be able to develop and understand a testimony and be able to differentiate between what makes us happy
now, and what will make us permanently happy? The way that Satan works, is he gives you everything pleasurable and fun
right now so that as you go along, you indulge and intake more and more, and then you need to get double the pleasure so
that you will go faster and faster downward to destruction. God is just the opposite. The way that God works, is He will
give you bits and pieces of things that will eventually lead you to your greatest happiness. But it takes a lot of time, and
doesn't appear fun at the start. Like scripture study. If you walk up to any young adolescent and say: “Study your
scriptures! They are so exciting and you will be able to understand God better!” Most of the time, they'll say: “I don't to
read my scriptures. I want to go out and hang with my friends, or go to a game, or a movie.” Just as the Lord says: “For as
the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts. For my
thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord. ” (Isaiah 55:8-9)
Sin is never worth it. It will always bring unhappiness. If you ever meet someone that says that their sins were worth it, it is
not yet over for them. They haven't gone through it all. Because in the end when they have gone through it all, they will say
that “wickedness never was happiness.” (Alma 41:10)
Satan wants to keep us away from our happiness, and wants to keep us away from God. If we just get passed our own
thoughts of how boring things are, or how uninteresting things seem, and just try to see the vision that God wants us to
see, it will motivate us and strengthen our testimonies along with our faith. The Lord knows our heart, the Lord knows the
trials we face, and He is patient with us. But as we are faithful we can one day know complete joy. There is an acronym for
joy that can help us remember our priorities and to remind us of what true joy comes from. True joy comes from
puttingJesus first, then Others, and then Yourself. One of the first experiences on my mission brought me true joy. In my
first area with my trainer in Liverpool, we were biking late one night on the highway when to my left I saw a man picking up
grass and throwing it away from the road. We passed him by, and compassion came over me as I thought “Was this man a
vagabond making a bed for the night?” I talked to my trainer about it and he asked “Do you think we should go back?” I felt
the yes coming right out of me! We rode back and stopped to talk to him. We greeted him and introduced ourselves and
told him about who we are and what we do. We asked if he would like to meet with us. He said he did and gave us his
phone number and address. I drove away that night with hope. Then we met with him at our set appointment. He was our
most faithful investigator. He never canceled or forgot our appointments, came to church every week, came to all the
sessions of general conference and quit his smoking and last August I learned that he was eventually baptized. Now I know
that this was the Lord's hand in it all. This man needed a good life. He lived in a rundown barn on the side of the highway
and smoked with poor friends. Now he can enjoy the gospel with real happiness and become better. I am grateful for
revelation, for the promptings of the spirit. I am also grateful that I followed the prompting. President Monson said "The
Sweetest Experience I know in life is to feel a prompting and act upon it and later find out that it was the fulfillment of
someone's prayer or someone's need. And I always want the Lord to know that if He needs an errand run, Tom Monson will
run that errand for Him."(On the Lord's Errand DVD) I am grateful for the experiences that have been recorded in my
journal. Sister Zehrung always emphasized the importance of journal keeping in her monthly letters to missionaries. I
appreciated that. Before my mission, I didn't really know everything about the church. I still don't. I know bits and pieces
like: Joseph Smith, the Book of Mormon, Follow the Prophet, attend church, pay your tithing, watch general conference,
date when your 16, watch and listen to good media and choose your friends wisely. I had all these facts floating around,
but didn't know how to fit them together like a puzzle. Through Preach My Gospel, and leaders on my mission, and
studying, I have been able to find out how these random pieces lock together into place. When you feel the excitement of
the spirit, you know you've got it! I'm the type of person who has to have everything lock in. I cant have things floating
around an not know where they go. I'm referring to things that anyone can understand. I'm not talking about speculation or
curiosity. Reading the Book of Mormon, I remember having problems with understanding from Omni to about 3 Nephi. The
church drills you on the story of Nephi and his family that there's not many questions. So I really wanted to know for my
third time reading the Book of Mormon all the facts and details that I was really confused about. I had the faith that God
would help me understand if I paid attention and really studied carefully all the things in that gap that confused me. So as I
took careful notes and made sure everything made sense before reading the next verse. And if I didn't get how a verse
connected with another, I went back and tried to spot the part I might have skipped or not read carefully. But I made it up
into the Alma 50's without any questions of how who went where and who left who to go where with what group to what
city. It all made sense and I felt so excited! This was another spiritual experience that I'm grateful for. Scriptures really can
build our faith and strengthen our testimonies. Things can, and will make sense. Albert Einstein said: “If you cant teach
simply, you don't know it well enough.” President Bulloch taught the same thing. He said that if you study hard and become
really familiar with the doctrine, and rely on the spirit, the message should just be able to fly out of your mouth quickly and
with little effort. And if you are still struggling with words, and still wondering what to say next, then you have to keep
studying to know it better. I know that is definitely true. I have felt the moments when I have struggled for what to say,
and moments it just comes out. Over the course of my mission I have visited with many less actives and have seen the
ones who don't get it. President Packer said: “True doctrine understood changes attitude and behavior.” That is my favorite
quote especially because I believe it and have seen how it is true.
The reason people fall out of the gospel is the same reason they fall out of bed. They just aren't in it all the way. I have
ever since wanted to be the one who gets it! We can't afford to miss out on all the many blessings our Heavenly Father
wants to give us. I am so grateful for this church and for the study of the Atonement. That has changed my view on
everything. I know that our Heavenly Father and our Savior Jesus Christ watch us, and that they wait for us. I'm grateful for
the temple blessings, and for forever families. I'm grateful for the relationship I have been able to develop with my
scriptures. This church has the greatest message the world could ever hear. A non member asked our Mission President
how he can get all of us young people dressed up, and out doing this everyday. President Bulloch Smiled and replied:
“Because God has spoken once again to man. To a 14 year old boy. And each of these young missionaries have a deep
burning testimony that this is true.” I want you to know that I know that the message of the Restoration is true and that
Joseph Smith did everything to help us in our days. Brothers and Sisters, may we constantly nourish our testimonies so that
it will build our faith. May we catch the vision and the spirit of missionary work. And I say this in the name of Jesus Christ
Amen.