Taking Care of Self So We Can
Take Care of Others
Dr. Kimberley R. Meyer
Objectives
• 1. Identify current levels of stress and margin.
• 2. Explore strategies to adjust personal and
ministry life that mitigate stress.
• 3.Create a plan for personal and ministry
renewal and refreshment.
Are you feeling…?
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Overloaded
Overwhelmed
Stressed
Weary
Exhausted
Tired
Frustrated
Resentful
Drained
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Powerless
Irritable
Barely surviving
Low energy
Galatians 6:9
• And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due
season we shall reap, if we faint not (KJV).
Locate
• Life and personal stress:
▫ What are my energy builders? What is depleting
my energy?
▫ Holmes and Rahe Stress Scale/Social
Readjustment Rating Scale
Locate
• Work/ministry stress:
▫ Professional Quality of Life Scale
Compassion fatigue
• The loss of work related satisfaction , or when the
job brings more distress than satisfaction (Stamm,
2010).
• Emotional, physical, social and spiritual exhaustion
that overtakes a person and causes a pervasive
decline in desire, ability, and energy to feel and care
for others (McHolm, 2006).
• Leads to low morale, decreased sense of personal
satisfaction, anxiety, depression, low self esteem,
powerlessness, physical and emotional exhaustion,
impaired job performance, absenteeism, and
turnover.
Adjust
• Attend to boundaries: Personal boundaries
▫ Thoughts
▫ Relationships
▫ Time
Ministry boundaries
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Guard your heart: Availability vs. presence
Guard the flame: Calling vs. demands
Guard the plow: Faithfulness vs. people pleasing
Guard the sheep: Self-centeredness vs. other
centeredness
• Guard the light: Long haul ministry vs. short
term pain relief
◦ Steve Merritt, 2005
Matthew 11:28-30
• “Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on
religion? Come to me. Get away with me and
you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take
a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—
watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of
grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on
you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to
live freely and lightly.” (MSG)
Renew: The practice of self care
• Development of a personal wellness plan
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Spiritual renewal
Go back: what builds my energy? Decompression?
Mobilize resources/support/healthy coping
Create margin
Self care tips
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Take stock
Start a self care idea collection
Find time for yourself everyday
Delegate
Have a transition from work to home
Learn to say “no” more often
Assess trauma input.
Learn more.
Consider joining a supervision/peer support group
Attend workshops regularly
Consider part time work
Exercise
(Mathieu, 2007)
Compassion satisfaction
• Ability to receive gratification from care giving
• Nourishing
• Sense of pleasure received from helping others
and feelings of positively contributing to the
work setting, colleagues, and society (Stamm,
2012).
• Invigoration and inspiration received from
sharing a person’s suffering.
Final thought
• “The Lord your God is with you, the Mighty
Warrior who saves. He will take great delight
in you; in his love he will no longer rebuke you,
but will rejoice over you with singing.”
Zephaniah 3:17
References
• American Holistic Nurses Association. (2012). Position
on holistic nursing ethics. Flagstaff, AZ: Author.
• American Nurses Association. (2013). Holistic nursing:
Scope and standards of practice. Silver Spring, MD,
Author.
• Cloud, H. & Townsend, J. (1992). Boundaries: When to
say yes, when to say no to take control of your life.
Grand Rapids, MI; Zondervan.
• Hybels, B. (2014). Simplify. Unclutter your soul. Tyndale
House.
• http://www.familyofmen.com/wpcontent/uploads/2012/04/stress_scale.pdf
References
• Johnson, S. (2012). A U.S. study of nurses’ self care and
compassion fatigue using Watson’s concept of caring. In J.
Nelson & J. Watson (Eds.), Measuring caring: international
research on caritas as healing (pp. 413-419). New York, NY:
Springer.
• Merritt, S. (2005).
http://archive.youthministry.com/details.asp?ID=5625
• Mathieu F. (2007).
http://www.compassionfatigue.org/pages/resources.html
• McHolm, F. (2006). R/X for compassion fatigue.
• http://www.nursingcenter.com/lnc/ovidws/_PDF_.aspx?an=
00005217-20061100000003&Journal_ID=642167&Issue_ID=673876
References
• Nelson, J., Itzhaki, M., Ehrenfeld, M., Tinker, A., &
Johnson, S. (2012). Nurses’ caring for self: A four
country descriptive study. In J. Nelson & J. Watson
(Eds.), Measuring caring: international research on
caritas as healing (pp. 357-370). New York, NY:
Springer.
• Stamm, B. (2010).The professional quality of life
elements theory and life measurements. Retrieved from:
http://www.innovativeeducators.org/v/vspfiles/IEfiles/
04_26_pro_ql.pdf
• Swenson, R. (1992). Margin: Restoring emotional,
physical, financial and time reserves to overloaded
lives. Colorado Springs, CO; Navpress.