5 Love Languages of
Children
Presented by: Melissa J. MacDonald
Love as the foundation
• You may truly love your child but unless she/he
feels it they will not feel loved.
• Every child has an emotional tank, a place of
emotional strength that can fuel them now
and in the future.
• By speaking your child’s own love language
you can fill his “emotional tank” with love.
The 5 Love Languages
• Physical Touch
• Words of Affirmation
• Quality Time
• Gifts
• Acts of Service
Remember
• Every child has their own special way of
perceiving love.
• No child can receive too much appropriate
unconditional love
• Your children will sense how you feel about
them by how you behave toward them.
Physical Touch
Physical Touch
• Physical touch is one of love’s strongest
voices.
• Studies have found that most parents only
touch when necessary
• All children need to be touched
• A hug given before a child leaves for school
could be the difference between emotional
security and insecurity through the day.
Physical Touch
• Keep filling the love tank even if your child
isn’t showing signs they need it
• In pre-adolescent and adolescence you must
keep touching
• Be intentional about physical touch
Loving through physical
touch
• Snuggle while watching tv together
• Hug and kiss your child every day before and
after school and as you tuck them into bed.
• Give high fives
• Play games that require physical touch
Words of Affirmation
Words of Affirmation
• Words of affirmation goes beyond just saying “I love
you”
• If you use praise too frequently, your words will
have little positive effect.
• The word encourage literally means “to instill
courage”
• The greatest enemy of encouraging is is anger.
• The volume of your voice matters greatly
Words of Affirmation
• Be careful not to give the right message in the
wrong manner.
• ie. Yelling “stop screaming and yelling at your
brother”
• Your words are very important and help shape your
child
• Be intentional
• “Parenting is not just a matter of doing what comes
naturally”
Loving through words of
affirmation
• Put a note in your child’s lunch
• Mention specific moments you’ve observed
that highlight your child’s accomplishments
• Create a special nickname for your child
• Say, “I love you”
Quality Time
Quality Time
• “He does things with me”
• Quality time is focused, undivided attention.
• Quality time is a parent’s gift of presence to a
child.
• You don’t necessarily have to go anywhere
• Use eye contact
Quality Time
• Quality time is not just doing things together,
it’s a time for knowing your child better
• Children never outgrow the need for quality
conversations with parents and adults.
Loving through quality
time
• Stop what your doing when your child is telling
you something important and make eye
contact with them.
• Ask specific questions about your child’s day
• Take family walks and bike rides together.
• Share meals as a family
Gifts
Gifts
• Other love languages must be given along with
a gift
• A true gift is not a payment for services
rendered, it is an expression of love for the
individual
• If we do not present gifts as expressions of
love, children may learn to receive them as
“what is to be expected”
Gifts
• Be careful not to abuse gift-giving
• Parents and grandparents may need to give
less rather than more, carefully choosing gifts
that will be meaningful.
• Not all gifts must come from a store
Loving through gift
giving
• Make a meal you know your child likes.
• Give your child a special song.
• Create a “secret drawer” where your child can
keep her small “treasures”- anything from a
bird feather to a pack of gum.
• Hide a small gift in your child’s lunch box.
Acts of Service
Acts of Service
• The day you found out you would have a child
you enrolled into full-time service.
• What would most please your children at the
moment is likely not the best way to express
your love.
• As you express acts of service to your children
you are setting a model.
Acts of Service
• Loving service is an internally motivated desire
to give one’s energy to others.
• Do an attitude check every now and then to be
sure that your acts of service are
communicating love.
Loving through acts of
service
• help your children practice for their sports
team
• Begin teaching your child the importance of
serving other through regular involvement
together in a local community group or church
ministry.
• Create flash cards for your child’s upcoming
test or quiz
Finding your child’s love
language
• It takes time
• Kids are constantly growing and shifting
• Children need all love languages to fill their
love tank
• Observe how your child expresses love
• Listen to what your child requests most often
Finding your child’s love
language
• Notice what your child frequently complains
about
• Give your child a choice between two options
• Be multi-lingual
http://www.5lovelanguages.com/asse
ssments/personal-profiles/children/
http://www.5lovelanguages.com/asse
ssments/personal-profiles/children/
5 Love Languages of
Children
Presented by: Melissa J. MacDonald