Gender-based Bullying
& Homophobic Harassment
A Gender Transformative
Approach to Creating
Safer Schools
Copyright TrueChild, Inc. 2012
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What We Do
Thought
Leadership
That
Brings a Gender
Transformative
Analysis
TrueChild
To Serving AtRisk Youth
In Policies
& Programs
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TrueChild
Create white paper reports and other intellectual collateral
1.
Provide onsite trainings & briefings
2.
Convene experts & policy-makers so research informs practice
4.
Partner in developing model “best practice” programs
Bec. harmful gender norms are
a root cause of educ. disparity
Esp. for disadvantaged
& at-risk children & youth.
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Copyright TrueChild, Inc. 2010
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Riki Wilchins, M.A.
Dir of Programs & Research
• 35 years advocating gender justice for at-risk youth
• Three books on gender norms & youth
• 1st human rights report on fatal assaults on
young Af-Am effeminate men/trans women
• Briefed White House, CDC, Office of Adol Health
• TIME selected 1 of 6 community advocates in
“100 Civic Innovators for the 21st Century.”
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Six Degrees of Gender
“Gender is what culture makes out of sex”
Gender Identity
An inner sense of one’s self as masculine or feminine,
male or female
Gender Expression
How we express a sense of being masculine or
feminine through clothing, preferences, and behavior.
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Six Degrees of Gender
Gender Roles
How each sex is subject to different expectations and
pressures, which results in feminine or masculine
behaviors and attitudes [Examples?]
Gender Traits
Having physical and emotional characteristics
considered feminine or masculine Think Lady Gaga
and Matt Damon as Jason Bourne.
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Six Degrees of Gender
Sex
Physical primary (genitals, chromosomes) & secondary
(body hair, bones) characteristics (1% of Burn Chart)
Sexual Orientation
Sexual attraction to males or females, men or women
LGBT/Q
Lesbian gay bisexual transgender questioning
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Six Degrees of Gender
Gender Identity
Woman
GenderQueer/Bigender
Man
Gender Expression
Feminine
Androgynous (Riki/Justin Bieber)
Masculine
Gender Traits
Feminine
Neutral
Masculine
Sexual Orientation
Gay
Bisexual
Straight
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Gender Norms
Socially-constructed expectations,
norms, scripts for male-female behavior,
characteristics, and roles
In bullying who does what, to whom, when & why
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Gender Norms
Are both Internal and External
o External (“Dude You’re a ‘Fag’”)
o Internal (I feel like a man when I act tough)
Are maintained through Pressure & Reward
o Pressure (“Boys Call Me ‘Cow’”)
o Reward (The boys really like me)
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Gender Norms
Esp important during ‘gender intensification’ period
o Late adolescence through early teens
o Interest in gender norms accelerates
o Belief solidifies
When girls lose interest in STEM
Boys drop outs incrs / GPAs nosedive
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Gender Norms
Gender differentiation and master
masc/femininity central rite of
passage and task of adol& teens
But…so is policing gender norms
Most schools: teasing, taunting
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Gender Norms
Tremendous anxiety abt gender roles
Real Man
Real Woman
“You make me feel like a natural woman”
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It’s a Guy Thing
Socially constructed???
Boys will be boys!?
Many masculinities…
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It’s a Guy Thing
The “Man Box”
We’re in this box, and in order to be in that box, you have to be strong, you
have to be tough, you have to have a lot of girls, you gotta have money, you
have to be a player or a pimp, you gotta to be in control, you have to
dominate other men, and you know if you are not any of those things, then
people call you soft or weak or a p*ssy or a chump or a f*ggot and nobody
wants to be any of those things. So everybody stays inside the box.
Byron Hurt “Beyond Beats & Rhymes”
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It’s a Guy Thing
What I see in my community is men fight so hard to gain respect of being acknowledged as a
man. What the f*ck you don't want to be a man for? As hard as we fight…
You’re going to get tested. Oh, they will test your manhood. So that's being the man. I mean, as
far as on a street level, just being a man, the problem is that you work so hard to be respected
and acknowledged as a man.
All my life, I've been brought up to be a man. You're going to accept responsibility, you're going
to be independent, you're going to take care of your mother-f*cking family. Anything get in the
way, you're going to handle your business.
Your father, your mother, your uncle, your aunt, your cousins, your sisters, your brothers have
been installing in your mind that this is what a man is, this is what a man does.
The way I was raised, there's certain things that you just don't say and there's certain things
that you just don't do as a man. And if you say them things or if you do them things, you're
going to get your head split, and that's it and that's all.
From a TrueChild focus group w/ young Black men
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It’s a Guy Thing
Attributes of Trad’l Masculinity
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
Strong
Dominant
Silent
Tough
Self-reliant
Powerful
Boisterous
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
Risk-taking
Aggressive
Heterosexual!
Despise homos
Sexual prowess
Take punishment
Physical
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It’s a Girl Thing
Many femininities…
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It’s a Girl Thing
Attributes of Trad’l Femininity
•
•
•
•
•
•
Softer, weaker
Thin & pretty
Submissive
Emotional
Must have a man
Pregnancy validates
womanhood
•
•
•
•
•
•
Wanted by boys
Defer to boys in rela.
Not too smart
Social, talkative
Virginal, naïve…or
Sexual exp & prowess
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Norms: The Good, the Bad & The Ugly
Strong
Aggressive
Dominant
Tough
Loner
Good provider
Protective
Women & child first
Good in times of danger
Independent judgment.
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Gender Norms Change
Do they ever!
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Gender Norms Are
Culturally Bound
Machista codes of femininity -- to be
submissive, quiet, shy, virginal – among
young Latinas can be very different from
pressure on femininity demands on
urban young Black women [freak, booty
calls, pulling a train, etc.]
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Gender Norms Are
Relational
Can’t address just boys OR girls
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Gender Norms Are Learned
(and take practice!)
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Gender Norming Starts Early
The Baby Crying: Angry / Sad? Bounce / Caress?
‘Big boys don’t cry’ / ‘Such a little lady’
By 2-4 Gender Typing: typing clothes, hairstyles, toys
[“Mr. Dylan” / ‘Action Figure’]
By 4-5 Gender Stability
[Two 4-year-olds: Jeremy wears a barrette to school. Another boy accuses him of being
a girl because "only girls wear barrettes." Jeremy pulls down his pants to show that he
really is a boy. The other boy replies, "Everyone has a penis; only girls wear barrettes.“]
By 6 policing starts.
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Gender Norms Are Highly Regulated
Male
Female
Ostracism Shame  intimidation  Violence
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Tools of Gender Regulation
Not as much physical violence as social:
 Ostracism & social isolation
 Ridicule (clothes, body, actions, interests)
 Shame & public humiliation
Not just power and punishment but self-regulation
Gender bullying usually social & witnessed
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Tools of Social Regulation
Mooing
Bra-snapping
Looking up skirts
In class in front of the teacher Joey would say “I
think I’m getting hard” to embarrass an
unpopular girl. The teacher only says “Joey calm
down.” Everyone laughs at the girl, who usually
You’re so stacked/ugly/hot
blushes and walks away.
Sexualized gossip/names
If a boy was quite, if he acted or walked different,
That’s so gay
Tripping/pushing [Doubt]
Stealing/hiding items
if they were in any way different they’d get
laughed about. Kids made up nicknames like gay
and faggot. If he’s not interested in girls they
call him gay. If someone isn’t good at sports
they’ll call him a faggot. One kid missed the ball
in gym class and they called him a fucking fag.
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Tools of Social Regulation
School: ideal profile for social policing
• Small population
• Same population
• For years at a time
• Homogenous peer groups by age
• Closed quarters
• Hyper-visibility
• No control over body, location, time
• Oversight often stretched thin
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Gender Norms Are Structural
Schools create regulate reinforce gender regimes…

Segregate activities or play by sex

Compare boys to girls and vice-versa

Reward males for boisterousness (and punish girls)

Assume girls want to be pretty, mommies

Ignore or discourage boys who play with dolls or play house

Seldom assign or encourage boys as caregivers

Tolerate gendered harassment or teasing of females
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Gender Norms Are Structural
 Use books, pictures, examples of only trad roles
 Fail to compliment or reward cross-gender behavior
 Treat boys/girls differently when needs are the same
 Team males/females up against one another
 Use gender to stigmatize (ok girls, let’s be ladylike”)
 Assume hetero-normativity
 Shame boys for crying, passivity, unathletic (man up!).
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Under-Resourced Environments
• Codes especially narrow
• Strong peer pressure on “the street”
• Harsh punishment for transgression
• Few ways to constructively display
masculinity/femininity
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Under-Resourced Environments
• Throw the ball
• Have lots of girls
• Get lots of money
Don McPherson
Former NFL Quarterback
“We don’t teach our boys to be men we
teach them not be women or homosexual.”
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3 Most Common Targets
1. Boys who aren’t masculine enough
2. Girls who aren’t feminine enough
3. Girls whose bodies mature b4 peers
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Common Boy Targets
Boys:
Like art/dance/music
High voice
Friendly, emotional closeness
Short
Bonded to one girl
Fat
Not sexually active enough
Unathletic
Bookish, obedient
Sensitive
Dressing square
Wear pastels
‘Acting white’
Play with girls
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‘That’s So Gay’
•
50-80% boys taunted w/ gay epithets
•
5-10% of boys are gay
•
Roughly ¾ of gay-baiting is policing masc
•
Not about gayness but gender norms
•
Esp. in elementary school [Ross]
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Common Girl Targets
Girls
Fat
Hairy
Tall
Very athletic
Not pretty enough
Not suff. interested in boys
Too interested in boys
Large breasts/small breasts
Dressing boyish
Plays with boys
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Strong Research Base
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Strong Research Base
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Programmatic Disconnect
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Programmatic Disconnect
Sxl Harass
Bullying
No Names
Respect
Tolerance
Pie
Homophobia
V. Specific or V. Generic Approaches
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Programmatic Disconnect
Sxl Harass
Bullying
No Names
Respect
Tolerance
Pie
Homophobia
Common underlying denominator:
Gender Norms!
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Programmatic Disconnect
Know a lot about:
•
Incidence
•
Prevalence
•
Impact on victims
Know little about:
•
Motivation of perpetrators
So we split the “pie” into “bad actions”
rather than focus on common motivation
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Gender Regulation is Systemic
On Teacher (In)Action
So common teachers felt could not stop it all
Would not have time for anything else
Not prioritized by administrators
Not supported by other teachers
The kids are astute enough to see that when they use the word ‘faggot’ they won’t get sent to the office
and when they use a racial slur, they get sent to the office. It’s a very quick connection to make…I had
one kid call another a ‘faggot.’ I hauled him to the principal but he didn’t want to suspend him. I really
had to push for it.”
“I spent the first couple months enforcing but you quickly realize that out of 20 teachers, we have
about five who do all the enforcing and you just can’t anymore…you just can’t do it.”
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Programmatic Disconnect
Old - Atomistic
New - Systemic
•
Individual actions
•
System of enforcement
•
Bad actors
•
Cultural norm
•
Top down
•
Bottom up
•
Exception
•
Routine
•
Punishment &
•
Change gender culture
prevention (zero tol)
of school
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Gender Transformative
Approaches to bullying & harassment that…
1. Highlight norms of fem/masc
2. Challenge students to think critically
3. Change them to be more equitable
4. Address culture of norms, not just
individual bad acts/actors
Geeta Gupta
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Gender Transformative
Gender Continuum -- Geeta Gupta/Anne Eckman
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Gender Exploitative
 Employ traditional gender norms
o Men as aggressors, in control, etc.
o Women as weak, mothers only, etc.
 Mine existing power imbalances
o Solidify them
 May work in short run but…
o May be unsustainable
o Harmful long-term consequences.
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Gender Neutral
 Gender analysis is assumed unnecessary, irrelevant
 Assumes neutrality is acceptable
 Neutrality reinforces and reproduces inequity, stereotypes
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Gender Sensitive
 No gender analysis of power, inequality, or norms
 Gender norms introduced to reach goals, not challenge system
 ‘Gender-by-numbers’ / address in isolation
 Limited to students – not school’s own gender regimes
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Gender Transformative
 Addressing gender norms explicitly
 Systemic: materials, exercises; school practices
 Affirmatively highlights inequities
 Questions stereotypes in popular media
 Affirms non-conformity/cross-gender behavior
 Are culturally-specific and sensitive 
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School Assessment Tool
1.
New staff trained recognize respond to gender intolerance
2.
Specific policies for dealing with gender harassment
3.
Materials, exercises, etc. that question rigid gender norms
4.
Has gender non-conforming/LGBTQ staff
5.
Challenges culture of gender conformity, power imbalance
6.
Has full buy-in from principal and staff
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Staff Assessment Tool
Educators & Management understand…
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
Gender concepts and definitions
Gender-based power imbalances
Culturally-specific gender norms
Gender-based bullying & harassment
Alternative and non-conforming genders + LGBTQ
Gender continuum approach
Educators & Management are committed to…
7.
8.
9.
10.
11.
12.
Being honest about their own gender non-conformity
Challenging compulsory heterosexuality & heteronormativity
Promoting gender non-conformity behavior, skills, aptitudes, interests
Engaging women as equally active and strong as boys
Engage boys as equally care-taking and sensitive
Challenging gender norms of masculinity, femininity
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Self Assessment Tool
1. I am committed to more healthy & equitable classroom & school
Heteronormativity
2. I check my own heteronormativity, integrate LGBTQ in my work
3. I am committed to challenging compulsory heteronormativity
Gender Norms
4. I am willing to model non-traditional masc/fem & gender non-conformity in work
5. I am committed to challenging harmful norms of masculinity & femininity
6. I integrate gender transformative stance through-out my work (not segregated).
Gender Roles
7.
I highlight & support “girly” behavior/skills/interests in boys and “boyish”
behavior/skills/interests in girls, bystanders)
8.
I encourage girls to be strong and brave, boys to be caretakers and sensitive
9.
I am familiar with culturally-relevant gender norms for my student population
Bullying
10. I am committed to challenging gender taunting and bullying at all times
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What Schools Can Do
Most harassment in public areas: lunchroom, playground, hallways
More monitoring will help
Most harassment is witnessed by other students
Encouraging witnesses to report is crucial
Most harassment is not reported by student witnesses
Creating a norm of reporting by witnesses
Most teachers who witness gender bullying/harassment fail to act
Training, clear policies, admin support, response for failure
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Online Gender Harassment
• Bullying moving from playground to keyboard
• Increase 2001-2006 of 400-900%
• Tends to replicate in-person bullying [Old wine]
• Not prototypical always connected geek
• Casual user gravitate online bec. victims
accessible
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Online Gender Harassment
• Email: 23% of victims / only 9% of bullies;
• Chat-room: 36% of victims / 36% of bullies
• Multiple sources: 41% of victims and 54% of bullies.
• Only 1/3 reported being bullying
• Only 1/3 reported incidents they knew of
• 60% of cyber-victims were girls/ 52% boys
• 32% were bullied by schoolmates
• 41% did not know the identity of the cyber-bully
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Technology
• Email
• Chat-rooms
• Pager text messages
• Instant messaging (cellphones)
• Defamatory websites (slam-sites)
• Cellphones
• Sexting
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Harassment in a Different Register
F2F
ONLINE
Known identity
Anonymous
Time constraints
Instant
One-to-one/two
One-to-many
Avoidable
Constant access
At school
Off school property
Poor teacher relations
Good teacher relations
Small community
Infinite community
Some privacy
Intrusive, no privacy
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Harassment in a Different Register
F2F
Bullies vs. victims
ONLINE
Anyone can (and does!)
bullying
Need to be bigger or
Split between bullies /
Have lots of friends
victims disappearing
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Preventing Online Harassment
Because it’s anonymous & bullies are victims…
• Zero-tol and punishment-based policies won’t work
• Observation and reporting policies won’t work
• Generic ‘no name-calling’ messages won’t work
• Shift from punishment to prevention model
Specifically address ROOT CAUSE - gender intolerance
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Some Sample G/T Exercises
1. What is gender?
2. The Boy Box / Girl Box
3. What Are You Called?
4. Action Figures/Dolls, Pink/Blue, Long/Short Hair
5. Daddies as mommies; Mommies as daddies
6. The Visual Map Exercise
7. Gender in Pop Culture
8. Love, Fear & Gossip
9. Parents & Grandparents
10. Cultural Differences
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www.truechild.org
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