Hope in Action
Ending Poverty through Systemic Change
Developing Relationships
& Supporting Change
© 2013, National Council of the United States
Society of St. Vincent de Paul, Inc. This copyright
covers all materials in this presentation except
where otherwise noted.
Vincentian Family – Hope in Action:
People-Oriented Strategies
 Listen carefully to needs and hopes
 Involve the individual directly in needs
assessment and goal setting
 Educate, train, and encourage spiritual well being
 Build self-confidence in the participant
Hope in Action…ending poverty through systemic change
“If you have come
to help me, you
can go home
again. But if you
see my struggles
as a part of your
own survival, then
perhaps we can
work together.”
–Lila Watson, an
Aboriginal Woman
from Australia
© aha! Process, Inc.
Building Relationships
 Accept others as they are
 Affirm their individuality
 Be objective
Hope in Action…ending poverty through systemic change
Mankind was made for relationships
 Our love of God – who we cannot see – must be
expressed by our love of neighbor – who we can see
 Only in relationship can love manifest itself
“Teacher, which commandment is the greatest? He said: “You shall
love the Lord, your God, with all your heart, with all your soul, and
with all your mind. This is the greatest and the first commandment.
The second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. The
whole law and the prophets depend on these two commandments.”
(Matthew: 22: 36-40)
Hope in Action…ending poverty through systemic change
Developing Relationships
 Monitor unspoken language (yours)
 Have a positive outlook
 Have patience & don’t get discouraged
Hope in Action…ending poverty through systemic change
What lens do we use?
What do we see?
Appearance
Actions
Situation/Context
Motivation
No significant
learning occurs
without a
significant
relationship.
–Dr. James Comer
© aha! Process, Inc.
Healthy Relationships
 Relationships take time to develop
 Relationships are built on trust
 Politics & Religion vs. Advocacy & Beliefs
Hope in Action…ending poverty through systemic change
Relationships with people of
different cultural backgrounds
 Learn about their culture
 Take a stand against their oppression
Adapted from The Community
Toolbox http://ctb.ku.edu
Creating Relationships
Deposits
Withdrawals
Seeking first to understand
Seeking first to be understood
Keeping promises
Kindness, courtesies
Clarifying expectations
Loyalty to the absent
Apologies
Open to feedback
Breaking promises
Unkindness, discourtesies
Violating expectations
Disloyalty, duplicity
Pride, conceit, arrogance
Rejecting feedback
Adapted from The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. (1989). Stephen Covey.
Creating Relationships
with people in poverty
Deposits made to individuals
in poverty
Withdrawals made from
individuals in poverty
Appreciation for humor and entertainment
provided by the individual
Put-downs or sarcasm about the
humor or the individual
Acceptance of what the individual cannot
say about a person or situation
Insistence and demands for full
explanation of person or situation
Respect for the demands and priorities
of relationships
Using the adult voice
Insistence on the middle class
view of relationships
Using the parent voice
Assisting with goal setting
Telling the individual his/her goals
Identifying options related to available
resources
Making judgments on value and
availability of resources
Understanding the importance of personal
freedom, speech, and personality
Assigning pejorative character
traits to the individual
© aha! Process, Inc.
Maintaining Relationships
 Pay attention to them – check in regularly
 Communicate openly
 Appreciate each other
 Extend yourself
 Challenge each other to do better
 Back each other when things get tough
Adapted from The Community
Toolbox http://ctb.ku.edu
Listening Skills

Reflect what you hear:
 It sounds like …It seems like …
 So you think …You feel …

Your interpretation is only a guess and may not
match what was actually meant.

Questions can be roadblocks. Instead of asking
questions, compare and contrast two statements
to encourage the person to continue clarifying.
© aha! Process, Inc.
When Relationships Get Messy
Adapted from The Community
Toolbox http://ctb.ku.edu
 Take time to listen to each other
 Put yourself in their shoes
 Look at what’s true about what they are saying
 Separate emotions from reality
 Continue to appreciate and respect each other
 Speak from your heart
 Don’t give up on your principles
 Hang in there…stay positive, even when they are not
The Empowerment Dynamic
Drama Triangle:
 Victims place blame on
Persecutors
 Victims need Rescuers to solve
problems for them
Empowerment Triangle:
 Creators are outcome-oriented,
focused on long term goals
 Challengers force clarification
of our goals
 Coaches ask questions to help
individual make informed
choices
Hope in Action…ending poverty through systemic change
Change Is Hard
“The need to act overwhelms
any willingness people have
to learn.”
–Peter Schwartz
“The healthier you are
psychologically, or the less you
may seem to need to change, the
more you can change.”
–Richard Farson
© aha! Process, Inc.
Encouraging Change
 Change – it’s not easy – understand potential barriers
 Stages of change
 Motivation – theory & advice
Hope in Action…ending poverty through systemic change
Barriers to Change:
Generated by Poverty
• Crisis living / “Tyranny of the Moment”
• Lack of “resources”
• Not knowing how to plan
• Co-existing problems
• Not knowing hidden rules of economic class
• Giving up self-image / identity is threatening
© aha! Process, Inc.
Barriers to Change:
Family and Social Network

Resistance to change by family & friends

Diminished social capital

The need to earn the respect of one’s peers

Not knowing the hidden rules of economic class
© aha! Process, Inc.
Barriers to Change:
Agencies and Organizations
 Clients perceived only as “needy”
 Talents, skills, gifts, and abilities to solve community
problems unrecognized
 Program theory / design based on middle class mindset
 Organizational change difficult
© aha! Process, Inc.
Encouraging Change
 Change – it’s not easy – understand potential barriers
 Stages of change
 Motivation – theory & advice
Hope in Action…ending poverty through systemic change
Stages of Change
 Pre-Contemplation
 Contemplation
 Preparation
 Action
 Maintenance/Relapse
© aha! Process, Inc.
Pre-Contemplation
“I’m not even thinking about change.
I don’t know how. I’m not willing.”
 Unconcerned about problems
 Ignorant of possible solutions
 “If I close my eyes, it will go away”
© aha! Process, Inc.
Contemplation
“I’m worried, and I’m considering
change, but I’m not sold on it yet.”
 Ambivalent - open to change, but lacks commitment
 Ambivalence is a natural reaction to change
 When in doubt, “put it off”
© aha! Process, Inc.
Contemplation
(continued)
The challenge:
- Help people through ambivalence
- Offer new ways of thinking
- Offer new mental models
© aha! Process, Inc.
Preparation
“I’m going to change, and I’m figuring out
how to do it.”
 Intention to change in the future
 Begins to make small changes
 “Yes, but … ” phase
 Fear of failure, fear of success
 The challenge:
- Identify what is important to the individual
- Assist in the development of a plan
© aha! Process, Inc.
Action – Beginning the Journey
“I’m actually doing it, but things are shaky.”
 Plan is executed
 Thinking has changed
 The challenge:
- Build their belief that this can be done
- Encourage them that they have the skills and
motivation to change
© aha! Process, Inc.
Maintenance/Relapse
“I’ve done it, and I’m now working on
keeping it.”
 Change continues
 Fits, starts, and plateaus
 The challenge:
– To prevent relapse
– To minimize the effect of relapse
– To be persistent in support and encouragement
© aha! Process, Inc.
Encouraging Change
 Change – it’s not easy – understand potential barriers
 Stages of change
Motivation – theory & advice
Hope in Action…ending poverty through systemic change
Motivational Approaches
FIX-IT APPROACH
MOTIVATIONAL
APPROACH
© aha! Process, Inc.
 Belief that those in poverty  Belief that people are the
can be controlled and are
solution, have skills to
needy
care for themselves
 Assumes that they lack
 People know problems
knowledge about the need
exist but sometimes lack
to change
motivation to change
 Assumes that education
 Education (abstract
will convince them to
representation of
change
concrete), new choices
Motivational Approaches
(continued)
FIX-IT APPROACH
© aha! Process, Inc.
 Those in poverty need
advice to change
 Sanctions and
monitoring will keep
them on track
 Metaphor: machine
MOTIVATIONAL
APPROACH
 People will internalize
and own the need to
change
 Persistence, insistence,
and support will help
people maintain the
changes they make
 Metaphor: gardener
Motivation
GOAL:
 The participant makes the argument
for change, not the mentors.
STRATEGY:
 Help them to understand the degree
of discrepancy between the current
behavior and the future story.
© aha! Process, Inc.
Theory of Change from “Getting Ahead”
What the Abstract Consists of:
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
Detachment
Objectivity
Analysis
Thinking
New ideas
New information
Education
Plans
Support
“Concrete”
35
Summary
 We were made by God for relationships…it’s how we
live out our love for God
 We need to be like Jesus: accepting and nonjudgmental
 Developing a significant relationship of mutual respect
with someone in poverty will require us to be flexible
and adapt to our differences
Hope in Action…ending poverty through systemic change
Key Points
 Be aware of the barriers to escaping poverty
 Understand the Stages of Change
 Encourage, Coach, Empower
Hope in Action…ending poverty through systemic change