Building Bridges …
… not Walls
Agenda
 The need for a relationship
 Roadblocks to communication
 Written communication
 Oral communication
 Cultural differences
 Dealing with parents
 First days of school
Nobody cares how
much you know,
until they know how
much you care.
-- Theodore Roosevelt
Parent  Teacher
Relationships
Why is it critical for us to develop
positive relationships with the
parents of our children?
Parent Roles that
Create Roadblocks
Protector
Indifferent-Parent
Inadequate-Me
Don’t-Make-Waves
Avoidance
Club-Waving-Advocate
School Roles that
Create Roadblocks
Authority-Figure
Pass-the-Buck
Protect-the-Empire
Busy-Teacher
Sympathizing-Counselor
Written Communication
Points to ponder …
Always begin with something positive.
Send home messages in parent’s native
language.
Use appropriate reading level.
Try to keep newsletters to one page
(and remember the $1 bill rule!).
Send audiotapes for parents who cannot
read.
Oral Communication
Whether phone call or conference …
Balance the positive with the negative.
Always begin with something positive.
Give parents the opportunity to
express their concerns and provide
solutions to problems.
Reflect what you hear the parent say
by using “I” statements (“What I’m
hearing you say is … Am I right?”)
Cultural Differences
Keep in mind that not everyone is
like you and be aware of …
Sharing space
Touching
Eye contact
Dealing with Parents
Divide a sheet of paper in half.
Label the left side “Behaviors that hinder
communication” and the right side
“Behaviors that promote communication.”
Now imagine that an irate parent or caregiver
shows up in your area. List things you
control and could do that might hinder or
would promote the conversation you are
about to have.
Behaviors that Hinder
Communication
Interrupting while the parent speaks
 Rehearsing your answer before you’ve
actually heard and understood what
the parent is trying to say
 Sitting behind your desk
 Trying to persuade the parent that
you are right and he/she is wrong

Hindering behaviors (cont.)
Showing no empathy
 Coming across as the know-it-all
professional
 Talking compulsively and over
explaining your point
 Complaining about your own agenda
 Giving unsolicited advice

Behaviors that Promote
Communication
 Shaking
hands and truly welcoming
them into your room
 Sitting eye-to-eye and knee-to-knee
 Active listening
 Maintaining an open mind
 Keeping calm and confident
Promoting behaviors (cont.)
 Getting
to the real issues
 Empathizing
 Speaking in a calm manner
 Being positive (and very gentle with the
negative)
 Giving options to parents
 Focusing on problems, not personalities
Remember …
Nobody cares how
much you know,
until they know how
much you care.
-- Theodore Roosevelt
Have YOU “hugged”
a parent today?