COUNSELING
17 November 2012
What is counseling?
Is a process that psychologically empowers individuals to seize
back control of their lives, while working through issues and
problems that cause them to lose self-esteem, as well as
confidence in their own abilities.
Counseling increases self awareness and a sense of well-being,
and is often the first step individuals take on their path to a
more positive life
PROCESS
ISSUES AND
PROBLEMS
REGAIN
SELF-CONTROL
INDIVIDUAL(s)
LOSS OF
CONFIDENCE
LOSS OF SELFESTEEM
empowerment
LOSS OF SELF
CONTROL
What is counseling?
 Professional guidance of the individual through
psychological methods; collecting case-history data,
using various techniques of personal interview,
testing interests and interviews
 Generally orients the individual to towards
opportunities to guarantee achievement of goals
and aspirations
 Usually attempts to clarify individual’s own thinking
rather than solve his problems
What is counseling?
THERAPY
ANALYSIS
TREATMENT
ADVISING
ADVOCATING
DIRECTING
ENCOURAGING
RECOMMENDING
What counseling is NOT
Not a filling-in time activity for people perceived to be crazy because of
their difficulty to cope with possible extreme emotional situations
It is not the magic answer to all of life’s problems; rather
a mechanism to help individuals cope with difficult,
personal situations
It is not an emotional crutch; nor a stand-alone
solution. Time and effort still have to exercised
by the individual toward creating emotional
improvements
Counseling is not advising. It is a supportive
advice in which the individual (client) is allowed
to gain better understanding of self by selfexploration of issues
COUNSELING vs. ADVISING
COUNSELING
ADVISING
GOAL
To promote self-understanding,
learning, self-reliance and personal
growth
To solve a problem as soon as
possible, if possible immediately
METHODS
We use various counseling
techniques to meet individual’s
needs and problems
Tells the individual what the
problem is and how it can be
resolved or tells him/her what to do
because the adviser is someone in
authority
Encourage the individual to have
faith in him/herself and ability to
solve problems; promotes selfconfidence, self-reliance and selfrealization
Encourages dependency on others,
diminishes self-reliance and selfconfidence, avoids responsibility
and therefore stunts personal
growth and self-realization
OUTCOMES
COUNSELING vs. COACHING
Coaching is primarily task-oriented; of counseling is personoriented.
Counseling may include goals for both performance and
growth as a person, coaching is basically data-oriented.
Coaching is generally directed to work performance while
counseling is both cognitive (thinking) and affective (feeling).
Strong involvement of the coach in coaching; involvement of
the counselor is oftentimes limited to asking process questions.
The session is usually initiated by the coach; in counseling
wherein the session may be initiated by the counselor or the
counselee.
“COUNSELOR”
Isaiah 9:6 For unto us a child is born,
unto us a son is given: and
the government shall be
upon his shoulder: and his
name shall be called
Wonderful, Counsellor1, The
mighty God, The everlasting
Father, The Prince of Peace.
yaw-ats'
A primitive root; to advise; reflexively to deliberate or resolve: - advertise, take advice,
advise (well), consult, (give take) counsel (-lor), determine, devise, guide, purpose.
ROLES OF THE COUNSELOR
1. PARA-PROFESSIONALS AS
PEER SUPPORT
2. OFFERS CHALLENGING
IDEAS
3. HELPS BUILD CONFIDENCE
4. OFFERS FRIENDSHIP
5. LISTENS TO PERSONAL
PROBLEMS
6. STANDS BY THEIR
MENTORS IN CRITICAL
SITUATIONS
7. OFFERS WISE CHOICES
8. TRIGGERS SELFAWARENESS
9. INSPIRE THEIR MENTORS
10. SHARES CRITICAL
KNOWLEDGE IF SOLICITED
11. OFFER ENCOURAGEMENT
ETHICS OF COUNSELING
 COMPETENCY &
COMMITMENT
 CONFIDENTIALITY
 RESPONSIBILITY
 CLIENT-COUNSELOR
RELATIONSHIP
• Obligation to extend
help
• “Ears only”, “Eyes
only” of disclosed
information
• Referrals of cases to
other helping
professionals
Counseling Hazard
OVERINVOLVEMENT (signs)
 Too much pre-occupation/concern with the
counselee – his/her problems and needs
 Identifying closely by carrying the problem as
if it is the counselor’s own problem
 Losing sleep wondering about the counselee’s
decision or response to problems
 Going out of the ordinary ways to help the
client
OVERINVOLVEMENT (dangers)
 Objectivity is lost; and counselor becomes an
ineffective agent
 Facilitator assumes responsibility and deprives
the counselee of learning and growing on
his/her own
 May even pose a danger to the counselor’s well
being
OVERINVOLVEMENT
(How does one handle it?)
 Self assessment – ego, motives
 A more detached and objective stand towards the
counselee and the problem
 Always assess your facilitation goals and
objectives
 Encourage counselee to assume his/her roles and
responsibilities outside the facilitating sessions
 Be emphatic but do not lose the “AS IF” attitude
 Be honest, if you can’t help make a referral
5 ESSENTIALS OF COUNSELING
1) relationship
2) setting
3) techniques
4) adjustments
5) feedback
RELATIONSHIP
THE HEART OF COUNSELING
IS THE RELATIONSHIP
BETWEEN THE COUNSELEE
AND THE COUNSELOR
THE ATMOSPHERE
PSYCHOLOGICAL
SETTING
PHYSICAL
SETTING
Acceptance
Empathy
Respect
Positive Regard
Permissiveness
Genuiness
Privacy
Quiet
COUNSELLING TECHNIQUES
•
•
•
•
•
•
LISTEN – ACTIVELY
SUGGEST – DON’T IMPOSE
ENCOURAGE – DON’T PUSH
REINFORCING OR REWARDING
MODELING AND ROLE-PLAYING
OBSERVING & DESCRIBING
BEHAVIOR
• SUMMARIZE/INTEGRAGE – DO NOT
CONCLUDE
ACTUAL ADJUSTMENTS
• SUPPORT
• COACHING (RE-ORIENTATION,
NEW SKILLS)
• PSYCHOTHERAPY
THE FOLLOW-UP
 DID THE COUNSELING
SESSION OR THE TECHNIQUE
APPLIED REALLY WORKED?
 NEED FOR FOLLOW-UP
SESSIONS?
 PERHAPS A NEW SETTING?
 ANOTHER COUNSELOR?
REFERRAL?
WHO SAID THAT?
SUCCESSFUL COUNSELORS ARE NEVER
TECHNICIANS, THEY ARE
FUNDAMENTALLY REASONABLE
PEOPLE.
Rev. Jaime Bulatao
THE SUCCESS OF COUNSELING
DEPENDS NOT SO MUCH ON THE
COUNSELOR’S ORIENTATION OR
TECHNIQUE, BUT ON HIS OR HER
MATURITY.”
Maureen McCarthy
THE POWER OF COUNSELING IS IN
THE KIND OF RELATIONSHIP
EXPERIENCED BY THE CLIENT.
THIS KIND OF RELATIONSHIP
NATURALLY FLOWS FROM THE
PERSONALITY
OF
THE
COUNSELOR.
COUNSELING IS
NOT A BAG OF TECHNIQUES.
COUNSELING IS A HUMAN
ENCOUNTER,
A
HUMAN
RELATIONSHIP
Adrian Van Kaam
THE EFFECTIVE COUNSELOR
1) Psychological maturity & moral
integrity
2) High level of common sense &
good judgment
3) Genuine interest and being for
people
4) Respect for the worth of an
individual and faith in him/her
5) Sensitivity to thoughts, feelings
of people & situations they’re in
6) Open-minded, tolerant and
flexible
7) Sincerity in attitudes
and actions
8) Friendly, warm,
accepting and emphatic
9) Objectivity in judgment
and interpretation
10) Sense of humor
Something to keep in MIND
TRUSTWORTHY
OPEN-MINDED
RESPECT FOR THE
WORTH OF THE PERSON
ACCEPTANCE
SENSITIVITY/SINCERITY
LISTENING – why can’t WE
 Not truly concerned with the needs of
others
 Pre-occupied with own problems and
concerns
 Insecure or just too lazy to be bothered
 Prejudiced/biased
 Selective listening, we
 hear only what we want to hear
How to be the EFFECTIVE LISTENER
 Sit closely to the person in an accepting and
respectful manner
 Lean towards the person
 Nod head occasionally to indicate affirmation
 Smile at times
 Look bright and alive
 Talk in moderation
How to be the EFFECTIVE LISTENER
PRACTICE “SOLER”
SOL ER-
SIT
OPEN (eyes and mind)
LEAN (but not too much)
EMPATHIZE
RESPECT
EMPATHY and SYMPATHY
HELPING BEHAVIORS
VERBAL










USE SIMPLE WORDS
REFLECT AND CLARIFY
ENCOURAGE
USE VERBAL REINFORCERS
GIVE INFORMATION
SENSE OF HUMOR
NON-JUDGEMENTAL
ACCEPTING
RESPECTFUL
SHARING/CARING
NON-VERBAL
 PLEASANT TONE OF VOICE
 EYE CONTACT
 OCCASIONAL NODING OF
HEAD
 FACIAL ANIMATION
 CLOSE PHYSICAL PROXIMITY
 MODERAT RATE OF SPEECH
 ACTIVE LISTENING
DON’T’s
 SNEER
 FROWN
 YAWN
 POINT FINGER
 SIT FAR APART
 JUDGE
 ARGUE
 CRITICIZE
 INTERPRET
 CONDEMN
 MAKE PUT-DOWN
AND RUDE REMARKS
CONDUCTING INTERVIEWS
1. AN INTERVIEW IS A CONVERSATION WITH A PURPOSE
2. BE NATURAL, BE YOURSELF
3. MEET THE COUNSELEE AS PLEASANTLY AS POSSIBLE
but without too much EMOTION
4. TAKE TIME AT THE BEGINNING OF THE INTERVIEW TO
PUT YOUR CLIENT AT EASE
5. BE A GOOD LISTENER. TALK ONLY WHEN NECESSARY
6. END AN INTERVIEW WITH A CONSTRUCTION NOTE
INTERVIEW TIPS (1/2)
SKILL
OPEN QUESTIONS
CLOSED QUESTIONS
ENCOURAGER
DESCRIPTIONS
WHAT? Draws out facts
HOW? Probe out feelings
WHY? Re asses
COULD? Get’s picture
FUNCTIONING
INTERVIEW
Questions can be used to
bring out major data and
facilitate conversations
Usually begins with DO, IS and ARE, Can quickly obtain specific
and can be answered in a few words data; close off lengthy
answers
Repeating back to the counselee a
few of his main words
Encourage detailed
elaboration of the specific
words and their meanings
INTERVIEW TIPS (2/2)
SKILL
PARAPHRASE
REFLECTION OF
FEELING
SUMMARIZATION
DESCRIPTIONS
FUNCTIONING
INTERVIEW
Repeating back the essence of a
Counselee’s words and thoughts
using the Counselee’s own main
words
Act as a promoter for
discussion; shows
understanding; check’s on
clarity of Counselor’s own
understanding
Selective attention to emotional
content of interview
Results clarification of
emotion, underlying key
facts; promotes discussion of
feelings
Repeating back of Counselee’s facts
and feelings (and reasons) to
counselee in an organized form
Useful in beginning
interview, periodically in
session to clarify where the
interview has come to date,
and to close the session