Business Messages Business Messages Are Important When A permanent record is required. Formality is necessary. A message is sensitive. An organized, wellconsidered presentation is necessary. Hidden Negative Meanings You are wrong . . . . (I am right.) You do not understand . . . . (You are not very bright.) Your delay . . . . (You are at fault.) You forgot to . . . . (You are not only inefficient but also stupid and careless.) Use Bias-Free Language Gender-Biased female attorney waitress man hours workman Improved attorney server working hours worker Biased Each employee has his ID card. Improved Each employee has an ID card. All employees have ID cards. Use Courteous Language Less Courteous Everyone must return these forms by January 1. More Courteous Please return the forms by January 1. Less Courteous This is the second time I’ve had to write! Why can’t you get my account straight? More Courteous Attached is my previous letter. Please help me straighten out this account. Use Simple, Familiar Language Unfamiliar We need to effectuate improvement of our manuals to better elucidate our training goals. Familiar We need to improve our manuals to clarify our training goals. Unfamiliar Sales reps generally conjecture when making sales projections for homogeneous territories. Familiar Sales reps generally guess when projecting sales in similar territories. Routine Messages Persuasive Messages Direct Letters and Goodwill Messages Bad News Messages Messages Direct Letters and Goodwill Messages 1. Direct requests for information and action 2. Direct claims 3. Direct responses to information requests 4. Adjustment letters 5. Letters of recommendation 6. Goodwill messages Writing Plan for Direct Claim Opening Body Closing Describe clearly the desired action. Writing Plan for Direct Claim Opening Body Closing Explain the nature of the claim. Tell why the claim is justified. Provide details regarding the action requested. Writing Plan for Direct Claim Opening Body Closing End pleasantly with a goodwill statement. Include end dating if appropriate. Letters of Appreciation to customers for their business, hosts and hostesses for their hospitality, colleagues for jobs well done, or individuals who have performed favors Letters of Sympathy to console a friend, relative, or loved one Three Types of Goodwill Messages Congratulatory Messages for engagements, marriages, anniversaries, births, promotions, appointments, awards, or any significant event Be selfless. Keep the message short. Be specific. Tips for Writing Goodwill Messages The Five Ss Be spontaneous. Be sincere. Writing Thank-Yous Cover three points in gift thank-yous. Identify the gift. Tell why you appreciate it. Explain how you will use it. Be sincere in sending thanks for a favor. Tell what the favor means to you. Avoid superlatives and gushiness. Maintain credibility with sincere, simple statements. Routine Messages Explain the request logically and courteously. Ask other questions if necessary Request a specific action with an end date, if appropriate. Show appreciation. Improving Openers for Routine Request Letters Opening Weak I’ve been given the task of locating a convention site for my company’s meeting. I’ve checked a number of places, and your hotel looks possible. Body Closing Improved Will you please answer the following questions regarding possible accommodations at the PC for a conference in May. Improving Closings for Direct Request Letters Opening Weak Thanks for any information you provide. Body Closing Improved We would appreciate receiving answers to these questions before April 4 so that we will have plenty of time to plan our conference.