6 Traits of Good
Writing
Sentence Fluency
The way individual words
and phrases sound
together within a sentence,
and how groups of
sentences sound when read
one after the other
Elements of Sentence Fluency
• The sentences are well constructed; they are
complete and correct.
• The sentences vary in length, structure, and
complexity.
• The sentences have varied beginnings.
• The sentences include creative and appropriate
transitions.
• The writing has rhythm and cadence.
• The sentences showcase the meaning.
Sentence Fluency in
The Writing Process
Prewriting
Drafting
Publishing
Sentence
Fluency
Sharing
Editing
Revising
Two Faces of
Sentence Fluency
Creative and Personal
• Sentences are easy to
read
• Sentence beginnings
are varied and
purposeful
• Play with style; short
and long sentences
• Fragments ok when
used for emphasis
Informational
• Sentences are clear,
direct, concise
• Direct subject-verb
structure dominates
• Sentences are
grammatically correct
and complete
• More technical the
content, the shorter the
sentences
Here’s a student example…
When I came home from school I headed right down to
the lakefront. It had been a rough day, and it’s always been
easier to think when I’m looking at that big, blank expanse of
water.
My guidance counselor was really upset with me when I
told him I wasn’t going to college next year. He kept going on
about my good science grades, my potential, my future. But
that’s just it. It’s my future, and I just don’t see college as part
of it—at least not right now. My parents aren’t thrilled about
my decision, either, but it’s too late to do anything about it
now. I missed all the application deadlines.
Tomorrow I’m going down to enlist in the navy. I know
it’s not what people expect of a girl my age, but I want to
experience those big ships, to spend time out on the ocean. I
can study oceanography in the navy better than at any
school. And there’s always been something pulling me to the
water. My biology teacher used to talk about how we all
came from the sea, and I laughed and said I always thought I
had seawater in my veins. I just know this is the right decision,
and that I am finally steering the right course.
Always ask…
• Is it fun to read aloud? Can you read it with
expression?
• Can you breeze through sentences quickly,
never losing the main thought?
• Do too many sentences start the same way?
Am I doing that for effect or as an accident?
• When I read this aloud, does anything sound
awkward or repetitive?
Varying Sentence Length
• Variety in length can help the reader stay engaged
with smooth and/or abrupt changes in length.
• You can measure the length of a sentence simply
by counting the words.
o Short sentences = 3 to 6 words
o Average sentences = approximately 8 to15
words
o Long sentences may be as long as 20 words or
more
Varying Sentence Length
• Too many short sentences in a row?
o Juvenile writing
o I like dogs. Dogs are loyal. They like to bark.
• Too many average sentences in a
row?
o BORING
• Too many long sentences in a row?
o Overwhelming and confusing
o Reader feels lost.
Sentence Combining
• What is it?
o1+1=1
• Why is it beneficial?
o Helps you develop style/voice—multiple options
o Focuses on how writing sounds to others
o Vary sentence combinations to convey different
ideas
o Reduces repetition and choppiness
Basic Practice
• Kernels
o
o
o
o
o
Kernel sentence = “irreducible” sentence
The dog ran.
The boy played.
The bird sang.
The lesson is boring.
• Combine kernels with punctuation,
words, or phrases to create new
sentences.
Combine the kernels
• The students are happy.
• The students are smart.
Combined
•
•
•
•
•
•
The smart students are happy.
The happy students are smart.
The students are smart and happy.
Happy students are smart.
Smart students are happy.
Happy and smart are the students
Combination possibilities
• Combine without changing anything—just
make sure it’s grammatically correct
• Rearrange words (parts of speech)
• Add transitional words
o
o
o
o
o
o
o
For instance
However
While
In reality
Nonetheless
For/and/nor/but/yet/so
because
• Add or eliminate details (what is important?)
• Change word forms
o “threw” to “was throwing”
How to decide on
combinations
• Think about…
o What information is redundant?
• Take it out!
o What information is most important?
• Should be the main focus of your combined
sentenced
o What is the relationship between the kernels?
• Clue with linking words—because of, which,
however, and, so, but, yet, or, etc.
More isn’t always better.
Cut the extra words.
Example:
The stadium has enough parking
space for fans’ automobiles and
other vehicles.
The stadium has ample parking space.
Final thought
• As long as you follow grammar
rules, no combinations are wrong.
• However, some combinations
may be more effective than
others. This depends on:
o Context within paragraph—content and
structure
o Audience
o Topic/purpose
Varying Sentence
Beginnings
We can’t start every sentence the same way. We
can’t expect people to read our writing if we do. We
can’t keep using the same words over and over at
the beginning. We can’t do this because it drives
readers crazy!
It also makes the writing hard to understand. Why?
Because readers start paying more attention to the
repetition of the sounds than they do to the meaning
of the words.
For Example:
We went to the baseball game.
We had fun. It was raining hard.
We got soaked.
Vary the beginnings and combine sentences :
Despite being soaked from the driving rain,
we had fun at the baseball game.
Varying Sentence
Beginnings
• Julian, my ten-year old brother, has an irrational
dislike of cheese. Julian will not knowingly eat
anything that has cheese, and in fact the simple
mention of cheese may very well throw him into a
fit. Julian’s favorite food is bizarrely pizza. Julian will
quite happily eat any dish so long as no one
mentions it contains cheese. Julian’s predilection
annoys me not only because my favorite thing to
eat is cheesecake, but also because it reminds me
that as a kid I had an even stranger quirk: I refused
to eat Asian food.
Varying Sentence
Beginnings
• Julian, my ten-year old brother, has an irrational
dislike of cheese. He will not knowingly eat anything
that has cheese, and in fact the simple mention of
cheese may very well throw him into a fit. Bizarrely,
one of his favorite foods is pizza, and he will quite
happily eat any dish so long as no one mentions it
contains cheese. Julian’s predilection annoys me
not only because my favorite thing to eat is
cheesecake, but also because it reminds me that
as a kid I had an even stranger quirk: I refused to
eat Asian food.
Varying Sentence
Beginnings
Rewrite the following sentence as many ways as you
can WITHOUT CHANGING THE MEANING
You have to be clever to survive school.
Varying Sentence
Beginnings
You have to be clever to survive school.
Need help? Use the following sentence starters:
• “Being clever…
• “Surviving school…
• “School…
Varying
Transitions/Conjunctions
• We have a tendency to rely on certain transitions
and conjunctions, and that can get repetitive.
Sometimes we don’t even realize our tendencies
and don’t take the time to reread. Overuse can
cause readers to focus on the repetition, and that
causes a loss of meaning. Reading your writing out
loud and having someone read it to you and
listening while they read can help you find areas
where you should delete and change words. Doing
this will make your writing smoother and better and
easier to understand for you and your readers.
Rewrite the explanation
without using “and”
• We have a tendency to rely on certain transitions
and conjunctions, and that can get repetitive.
Sometimes we don’t even realize our tendencies
and don’t take the time to reread. Overuse can
cause readers to focus on the repetition, and that
causes a loss of meaning. Reading your writing out
loud and having someone read it to you and
listening while they read can help you find areas
where you should delete and change words. Doing
this will make your writing smoother and better and
easier to understand for you and your readers.
Final practice with sentence combining…
1. I live in a house.
2. The house is made of brick.
3. The brick is red.
4. The house has a garage.
5. The garage is brown.
6. The garage is made of wood
7. There is a fence.
8. The fence is high.
9. The fence goes around the house
10. I like the backyard.
11. The backyard has trees.
Combine all of these details into 2 to 4 sentences using the
three things we talked about: vary the length, vary the
beginnings, and vary the transitions/conjunctions (you can’t
use “and” or “but”)
Final Tips
•
•
•
•
•
•
Read it out loud.
Have someone read it to you.
Combine.
Don’t get breathless.
Check out those first four words.
Look for repetition.
Your Task
• Read through your personal
statement. Make changes to
intentionally…
o Vary sentence lengths
o Vary sentence beginnings
o Vary transitions and conjunctions
Think about what information you want
to emphasize—how can you make that
stand out with the sentence structure?