English Notes
October 8, 2014
Homework: Read pages 145-168
“All of Dwight’s complaints against me had the aim of giving me a definition of myself. They succeeded,
but not in the way he wished. I defined myself by opposition to him. In the past I had been ready, even
when innocent, to believe any evil thing of myself. Now that I had grounds for guilt I could no longer
feel it” (134).
Why is this a key moment in the development of Jack’s identity?
Dwight tries to make Jack feel down about himself. However, Jack won’t let Dwight define who he is. It
is up to Jack to believe what he wants about himself (whether or not it is true).
 Development—Good? Bad? Both?
Both—could lead Jack to his “inner self” and an understanding of who he is
Good—Jack’s identity is within his control
Bad—Jack could be in denial about his identity
Page 121
Jack imagines his father being good—since he is absent from his life, it is easy to imagine him as good.
“I could give him sterling qualities and imagine good reasons, even romantic reasons, why he had taken
no interest, why he had never written to me…”
Flash-forward-- When Jack becomes a father and is in his “father’s shoes” he can’t understand why his
father left him. He discusses when his newborn baby had blood taken (nurse had trouble taking blood)
and how he felt like he “had snatched him from a pack of wolves, and as I held him something hard
broke in me, and I knew that I was more alive than I had been before.”
Page 129
Norma and Bobby—couple, sad, disconnected
Jack is in the backseat of the car (where Norma and Bobby were)
Jack says “I never thought she would do this to me.”—Norma was Jack’s crush. He can’t believe she
would be romantically involved with Bobby in the backseat. He imagines slapping her, throwing her out
of their mansion and letting her back in (this is all made up in his head). He is crushed over losing his
first crush.
Page 133
“I was a liar. Even though I lived in a place where everyone knew who I was, I couldn’t help but try to
introduce new versions of myself as my interests changed, and as other versions failed to persuade. I
was also a thief.”
--read newspapers and believed he could get away with crimes
--stashed money in an ammunition box
--Took candy
--thinks of shooting Dwight
--mocks his friend Arthur behind his back
Dwight would call Jack a sissy, liar, and thiefhe became all of these things
Page 140-142
Jack writes a letter to his uncle. He fictionalizes his circumstances (stretches the truth). Writing the
letter to his uncle can impact Jack’s life. He’s taking control of the story of his own life.
Based on the letter, uncle and aunt offer to adopt Jack. Jack worries about changing his name again
(Toby Wolff, Jack Wolff—new name = new identity).
Dwight wants Jack to leave—wants him out of the picture so that he can keep Rosemary.
Jack says he is “his mother’s son. I could not be anyone else’s.” He realizes he could not become
anyone else’s son. He reflects on his mother teaching him to write. “I could not, cannot, put pen to
paper without having her with me.”
Page 144
Jack does not to Paris
He imagines a better life for himself one day—perhaps in Paris
He decides to remain with his mother, but he is conflicted over going to Paris.