Lyricism in the Writing of Robert Walser & Kajii Motojirô

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The  Adapta*on-­‐

Transla*on  Con*nuum  

When we say translate we allude to the

Latin source, “to carry across,” but we mean many things. In its most legalistic sense translation suggests a correspondent rendering of the original text in the target language. However, most working definitions of translation reflect a continuum that ranges from correspondence on one end to adaptation on the other.

correspondence

translation

adaptation

Lyricism  Defined

Although hard to pin down, the term

lyrical

, stemming from

lyre

, the instrument used to accompany ancient Greek poetry, usually applies to a direct style, sometimes referred to as “affective-expressive,” that is honest, emotional, spontaneous, and often works toward revealing heretofore-unknown insights or motivations. It can also have overtones of musicality that take full advantage of the sound elements of language. Ralph Freedman has characterized lyricism in prose as “the direct portrayal of awareness,” and Colin Falck sees lyricism as “the most essential of our linguistic modes of apprehension of reality.”

Freedman, Ralph. The Lyrical Novel: Studies in Hermann Hesse, André Gide, and Virginia

Woolf . Princeton UP, 1963, p. viii.

Falck, Colin. Myth, Truth and Literature: Towards a True Post-Modernism. Cambridge UP,

1989, p. 60.

J.  ScoX  Miller  

Professor  of  Japanese  &  Compara/ve  Literature,  Brigham  Young  University  

Stereoscopic  Examples  of  ‘Lyrical  Transla*on’

 

Translators often work with

assumptions

that prioritize

content

over

style

. This approach is well-suited to original texts that are primarily

narrative

prose, or reported speech (

dialogue

), but falls short of the mark if the text contains

lyrical

passages that exhibit shifting

perspectives

, layers of

deeper meaning

, or literary

allusions

. In order to remedy this shortfall I propose a modified approach to translating lyrical prose that involves the translator preparing

two translations

, the first following standard

content

-focused assumptions and the second, executed as something of an

adaptation

, emphasizing the

lyrical mode

. The final, published, translation would be a

hybrid

of the two that would benefit from the advantages of both. Below I demonstrate this approach using short passages by Walser and Kajii that share a common theme: an insight gleaned from taking a stroll.

Robert Walser: “Der Greifensee” 1898 Kajii Motojirô: 「筧の話」 1928

Original:

“Ich gehe immer weiter und werde zuerst wieder aufmerksam, wie der

See über grünem Laub und über stillen Tannenspitzen hervorschimmert; ich denke, das ist mein See, zu dem ich gehen muss, zu dem es mich hinzieht. Auf welche Weise es mich zieht, und warum es mich zieht, wird der geneigte Leser selber wissen, wenn er das Interesse hat, meiner Beschreibung weiter zu folgen, welche sich erlaubt, über Wege, Wiesen, Wald, Waldbach und Feld zu springen bis an den kleinen See selbst, wo sie stehen bleibt mit mir und sich nicht genug über die unerwartete, nur heimlich geahnte Schönheit desselben verwundern kann.”

Original:

この径を知ってから間もなくの頃、ある期待のために心を緊

張させながら、私はこの静けさのなかをことにしばしば歩い

た。私が目ざしてゆくのは杉林の間からいつも氷室から来る

ような冷気が径へ通っているところだった。一本の古びた筧

がその奥の小暗いなかからおりて来ていた。耳を澄まして聴

くと、幽かなせせらぎの音がそのなかにきこえた。私の期待

はその水音だった。

Correspondent translation:

"I keep going and begin to notice once more when the lake gleams above green foliage and unmoving spruce tops; I think, “That is my lake, to which I must go, to which I am drawn.” In what manner it draws me, and why it draws me, will the kind reader himself understand, if he should have the interest to follow my description, which allows itself to skip over paths, meadows, forests, forest brooks, and fields and proceed directly to the small lake itself, where it will stand with me, unable to marvel enough at the unexpected, only secretly anticipated beauty thereof.”

Correspondent translation:

“Some time shortly after I came to know this path I began to take regular excursions to enjoy its tranquility, inwardly somewhat anxious because of a certain expectation. My destination was a place along the path, within a cedar grove, where a cool breeze constantly flowed down the path, as though coming from an ice house. A single old water pipeline made of bamboo trunks ran down from the shadowy interior. If I listened carefully I could hear a quiet murmur within. How I anticipated that sound of water.”

Lyrical translation:

"I keep walking but only begin to pay attention once more as the lake shimmers forth over green foliage, over the still, silent crests of fir trees; I think, “That is my lake, to which I must go, drawing me to itself.” In what manner it draws me, and why it draws me, the gentle reader will himself soon discover should he muster the interest to continue following my description, which now takes the liberty to bypass all the ways, wastes, woods, waters, and fields to arrive at the small lake itself, where it stops, right beside me, unable to marvel enough at the lake’s surprising, only secretly suspected beauty."

Lyrical translation:

“Shortly after I first discovered the mountain track I found myself, filled with a kind of pensive anticipation, choosing this path over and over again, just to enjoy its tranquility. My destination was a spot where cool air, like that from an icehouse, constantly streamed down from the cedars and traveled along the path. There a long, weathered bamboo pipe ran down from within the gloomy shadows. Listening closely I could hear the faintest murmur deep within the pipe. I always looked forward to that sound of water.”

Robert  Walser  (1878-­‐1956)  

Nationality: Swiss Illness: anxiety and hallucinations

Robert Walser emerged as a

fin de siècle

writer of note widely admired by the likes of Kafka, Hesse, Musil and

Zweig. Mental illness haunted him throughout his life, however, and he spent the final three decades in an asylum. He wrote several novels and a large body of short lyrical fiction.

 

 

Kajii  Motojirô  (1901-­‐1932)  

Nationality: Japanese Illness: tuberculosis

Kajii Motojiro was a promising young writer, admired by contemporaries, whose life was cut short by TB just

  as Japan entered into the militarism leading up to

WWII. Well versed in Western and Japanese literature,

  he wrote evocative short fiction and is best known for his profound, lyrical novella

Lemon

.  

Crosstransla*ons  

Kajii auf Deutsch:

「桜の木の下には」 “Unter den Kirschbäumen”

Du musst es glauben. Na ja, sonst könntest Du unmöglich glauben, daß Kirschbäume so schön blühen könnten. Ich war in den letzten zwei oder drei Tagen verstimmt gewesen, weil ich nicht an einer solchen Schönheit glauben konnte.

Aber jetzt habe ich es endlich verstanden: Es sind Körper unter den Kirschbäumen begraben.

“Musik”

Walser auf Japanisch:

「音楽」

ピアノはぼくにこの上もなく魅惑的な調べを聞かせてくれる 。 たとえつ

たない弾き手がそれを弾くときも 。 ぼくは演奏を聞くのではない 、 ただ

調べを聞くだけだ 。 ぼくは決して演奏家にはなれない 。 というのも 、  

どんなに演奏しても 、 まだ甘美さや陶酔が足りないと思うだろうから 。

聞きいることの方が 、 もっと浄らかなことなのだ 。 音楽はいつもぼくを

物悲しい気分にする 。

Acknowledgments  

Assistance from Jacob Valentine, Alison Romano, Jennifer

Pollei, and the Brigham Young University College of

Humanities.

Further  informa*on   scott_miller@byu.edu

801-422-5225

Translate  like  a  human!  

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