VCE Literature, Unit 3: Transformations and adaptations
Texts
So much water so close to home (1977) by Raymond Carver, in Robert Drewe’s “Stories of the Beach”, list A.
Carver reworked this story for subsequent collections of his short stories, so that it became more elaborated. The
story in Drewe’s collection is very spare by comparison.
Jindabyne (2005) directed by Ray Lawrence
This Unit of work will be completed during ten 53 minute periods, including the Outcome task.
Period 1, plus homework
Read So Much water So Close to Home in class,
including class discussion.
Period 2 and 3, plus homework:
Complete tables for the short story: Handouts 1 &2
Period 4, 5 and 6, plus homework
Watch the film, with some discussion at the end of each
session: Handouts 3
Practice questions
Period 7 and 8, plus homework
Discussion of the film in relation to the short story:
Handout 4
Period 9 and 10
Outcome
2
Handout 1
So much water so close to home, by Raymond Carver in Stories of the Beach Drewe, R.
Point of view: Stuart’s wife, Claire - first person narrator
Task
Track through the development/ progression of the narrator’s feelings.
Section 1
In the kitchen
Simple present
Section 2
He and Gordon
Johnson and Mel Dorn
and Vern Williams…
Simple present
Section 3
Last Friday…
simple past tense
Stuart returns home
Simple past
Section 4
The drive
Simple present
Is this a continuation of
the first section ?
Section 5
Pretending to sleep in…
Simple present
Section 6
At the hairdressers…
Simple present
Section 7
Drives through the
country on way to
funeral…
Section 8
At the funeral
Simple present
Section 9
Surrenders to husband
Simple present
“It was then that he told me what I just told you.”
3
Handout 2
Meaning/ interpretation
Evidence from the text
What sense of the married relationship do you have? For instance…





Is it conventional?
Is it satisfying?
Is it predictable?
Is it strong?
Is it equal?
What sense of Claire do you have? For instance…






Is she well- educated?
Is she smart?
Is she confident?
Is she assertive?
Is she dutiful?
Is she rational?
Who might be the ‘you’ addressed by the narrative voice?





the general reader
a close female friend
of the narrator
a marriage guidance
counselor
a police interviewer
a psychiatrist
Might it be argued that Carver’s story is about…

Misogyny, rather than
careless sexism?

Derangement, rather
distress?
4
Handout 3
Short story
First person narrator
Few pages, print text
Contained and crafted. Pregnant with subtext, although
readily examined and teased out because of mode and
length. Lack of resolution?
Film
Claire’s point of view, often but not always
2 hour film
More ranging exploration of more ideas and aspects that have
their genesis in the Carver story?
 Claire’s post natal depression
 Men’s sexism, lechery
 Fishing weekend detailed- we see and hear the men’s
behaviour and responses; it is not just reported
 Relationships of other men and between the men
 Relationships between the women
 Relationships between other couples
 Overtones of racism as well as sexism in the world of the
film
 Aging men- Stewart’s hair dye, his past glories as a
champion driver; not being able to keep up, “old man”
 Aging women- bereaved women
Vanessa’s relationship with Stewart’s first wife. The
impact that Claire’s ( terminated?) pregnancy might have
Jude’s murdered daughter
 Generational change in attitudes/ understandings of the
women- Billy and Rocco’s girlfriends
 The children
Caylin-Calandria and Tom
 Death, attenuation, generation
Suggestiveness of visual images, landscape
All the stories the submerged town and its people- the tolling bell, the
zombies…
 The Jindabyne newsreel
 Catholicism and aboriginal lore
 Jokes- three women went in to a bar
 The stories of the weekend
 The children’s rendition of the weekend
 More?
Resolution?
5
Handout 4
Some excerpts of reviews
The story is one of American writer Raymond Carver’s, in a short story of spare skeletal strokes pregnant with subtext.
Screenwriter Beatrix Christian and the director have evolved the story and added social context and an indigenous relevance
without losing the impact of the original…Each character is shadowed by something in their past and the haunted quality of
the film is textured by the setting of the town of Jindabyne. The sense of displacement shared by most of the characters – not
only Irish Stewart (Gabriel Byrne) and his American wife Claire (Laura Linney) - is within the town itself. A small rural centre in
the Snowy Mountains of NSW, it was relocated when the old town was drowned by the rising waters of the Snowy Mountains
Hydroelectric Scheme. The dark placid waters of Jindabyne Lake cover the ‘drowned town’ and sacred ground of the
scattered aboriginal population. The rounded granite boulders and rock formations that line the lake and form outcrops in a
countryside of yellow tussocky grass speak of an ancient, abraded land. Wind- and snow-sculpted rocks, mist above the lake
and the extraordinary vaulted sky are captured magnificently in the cinematography of David Williamson.
http://www.infilm.com.au/reviews/jindabyne.htm
…this haunting interpretation takes the story into an entirely different environment – Jindabyne, in southern NSW
on the edge of Kosciuszko National Park. The spectacular setting becomes a character in itself, as placid as the
people in it are volatile.
http://www.messenger.net.au/Pulse/htm/jindabyne0406.htm
Practice Task
Use this stem as the beginning of a discussion that compares and contrasts the two texts
“Carver’s narrator in So Much Water So Close To Home seems to be on the brink of madness, unable to
articulate the nature of the oppression that she feels. In the film Jindabyne, Ray Lawrence adapts this short
story so that…”
6
VCE Literature, Unit 3
Outcome 1: Transformations and adaptations
2007
You have a double period in which to complete the task.
Choose one of the following options:
1. Jindabyne clearly has its genesis in So Much Water So Close to Home, but the film’s scope is much
more than that of the short story.
Discuss.
OR
2. It is easier to read So Much Water So Close To Home simply as a tale of sexist oppression than it is to
read Jindabyne in this way.
Discuss.
Handout 5: may be referred to during the Outcome
Some of the characters in Jindabyne
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Susan
Claire
Stewart
Caylin-Calandria
Tom
Vanessa
Carl
Jude
Elissa
Carmel
Rocco
Billy
Outcome 1
Analyse how meaning changes when the form of a text changes.
MARK RANGE
DESCRIPTOR: typical performance in each range
8
33–40 marks
Thorough and complex understanding of the ways in which
the form of a text is significant in the making of meaning.
Comprehensive knowledge of the conventions in the forms
of both the original and transformed texts. Excellent use
of terminology appropriate to the relevant forms of text.
Sophisticated analysis of the ways in which meaning is
altered when the text is transformed. Considered selection
and highly-effective use of textual evidence to support an
interpretation. Highly-expressive and coherent development
of ideas.
25–32 marks
Thorough understanding of the ways in which the form of a
text is significant in the making of meaning. Detailed
knowledge of the conventions in the forms of both the
original and transformed texts. Very good use of terminology
appropriate to the relevant forms of text. Insightful analysis
of the ways in which meaning is altered when the text is
transformed. Careful selection and effective use of textual
evidence to support an interpretation. Expressive and coherent
development of ideas.
17–24 marks
Some understanding of the ways in which the form of a text is
significant in the making of meaning. Sound knowledge of the
conventions in the forms of the original and transformed texts.
Appropriate use of terminology in relation to the selected text
forms. Some analysis of the ways in which meaning is altered
when the text is transformed. Relevant selection and use of
textual evidence to support an interpretation. Clear and
coherent development of ideas.
9–16 marks
Some awareness of the ways in which the form of a text is
significant in the making of meaning. Some knowledge of the
conventions in the forms of the original and/or transformed
texts. Some use of relevant terminology in relation to the
selected text forms. Limited discussion of the ways in which
meaning is altered when the text is transformed. Some
relevant selection and/or use of textual evidence to support an
interpretation. Clear expression of ideas.
1–8 marks
Limited awareness of the ways in which the form of a text is
significant in the making of meaning. Limited knowledge of
the conventions in the forms of the original and/or
transformed texts. Little use of relevant terminology in
relation to the selected text forms. Little or no identification
of the ways in which meaning is altered when the text is
transformed. Limited selection and/or use of textual evidence
to support an interpretation. Simple expression of ideas.
9
Examples of student work:
So much water so close to home
Point of view: Stuart’s wife- first person narrator
Track through the development/ progression of the narrator’s feelings.
Section
1
In the kitchen
Simple present
Section
2
He and Gordon
Johnson and Mel
Dorn and Vern
Williams…
Simple present
Last Friday…
simple past tense
Section
3
Stuart returns
home
Simple past
Section
4
The drive
Simple present
Is this a
continuation of the
first section?
Section
5
Pretending to
sleep in…
Simple present
Section
6
At the
hairdressers…
Simple present
 Distracted, distant. Opens with little emotions. The only sign of emotion is “I close my eyes and hold on to the sink. Then I
rake my arm across the drainboard and send the dishes and send the dishes on the floor”
 Short sentences, only reacting to Stuart, noticing everything instead of trying to short out? her feelings. Examining
behaviour. Rage, frustration, turmoil. But still in a way restraining and containing herself. Feels powerless.
 Reads like a script- elaborate- rather than a story- like a documentary.
 Defensive of Stuart and his friends- “they are decent men, family men, men who take care of their jobs”- trying to convince
herself that her husband is not to blame for anything.
 Shift from the present tense turning into a recount
 Use of “these, they”, removing the men form the speaker, reinforcing the documentary style. Detached voice, matter of fact
 Odd details presented “he got some nylon cord and tied it to her wrist and then looped the rest around a tree.” Trying to
distract from the actual dead body.
 The story is repeated, second hand account turned into a recount- has Stuart possibly censored it?
 Yet she uses “my Stuart”, once showing some connection to the story, but then is almost immediately degraded back to “ it
might have been Stuart”
 Only mentions the body when her path crosses with the men’s
 Show little emotion by mentioning they “washed them where the girl was” –be is still reluctant, subtle and restrained
 Only ever describes the women as “the girl” maybe trying to take the dead aspect out of the story. Trying to reduce what the
men did.
 Again defending the men “they had nothing to hide…they weren’t ashamed”
 Shows connection with Stuart “I woke up when I heard him in the kitchen” then there is the physical connection- “put his
heavy arms around me and rubbed his big hands on my back”
 There is a real sense of mechanical duties, no real love or passion- “I turned and opened my legs. Afterwards I think he
stayed awake” seems to be aware that something is wrong before the phone call.
 “It was then that he told me what I just told you.”
 Simular to the first section- it comes chronologically. Claire not doing much talking, Stuart telling her a lot.
 Less documentary style- “so much water so close to home” appears to have more insight, more emotion, more personal.
 Not as detached, thinking for herself and questioning her husband. Yet she still mentions her observations. “stack of
newspapers just inside the door”
 Shows less concern for him, almost disobeys – why do you want ot use this word?- him, continues talking when he tells her
to stop because she was getting him “more riled buy the minute”
 Distance between Stuart and Claire- “there is nothing I can say to him”
 She appears more anxious and more affected by him and his mystery. “I look at the creek. I’m right in it, eyes open, face
down, staring at the moss on the bottom, dead” elaborate
 Signs of her suspicion towards Stuart, or at least regret or exasperation- “why did you have to go miles away?”…”they said
they were innocent. They said they were crazy”
 Avoiding Stuart almost frightened of him. “Twice he look s in and clears his throat. But I keep my eyes closed.”
 Seems to be repulsed by him “I was …lying on the far side of the bed away from his hairy legs.”
 Shows disregard for his note- “I…drink coffee and leave a ring on the note”
 Decides to read what happened, doesn’t want to avoid the issue “I look at the newspaper and turn it this way and that on
the table. Then I skid it close and read what it says.”
 The listing of the butchery the body went through is her interpretation of the newspaper article.
 Tries to connect herself with the murdered girl, trying to justify it? Get sympathy- “I am going to a funeral tomorrow…it was
a murder…we weren’t all that close…but you know” maybe the hairdresser has heard about the death? Hairdressers are
cheap therapists
 Distances herself from Stuart- “that night I make my bed on the sofa, and in the morning I get up first…whenever Stuart
looks at me I ask dean if he wants more milk more toast ect. Aaargh!”
Section
7
Drives through the
country on way to
funeral…
Section
8
At the funeral
Simple present
Section
9
Surrenders to
husband
Simple present
 But there is still her duty involved- “here’s coffee, eggs’ll be ready in a minute”
 Almost paranoid about the others at the funeral, will the know her? What will they think of her? “I dress carefully. I try on a
hat and look at myself in the mirror”
 Seems to want to be alone while also almost frightened of everything around her. “A green pickup comes up behind me and
stays behind me for miles. It kept slowing at the wrong times, hoping he will pass”
 Really anxious, nervous and paranoid. “ I grip the wheel until my fingers hurt”
 No trust towards men frightened of what they may do to her. “I lock the doors and roll u the windows.
 Been oppressed by men, understands her mercy ? towards them?
 Defenceless and vulnerable in front of the man, almost waiting for him to exploit her and manipulate her position. “Face to
the window” (invading the space between them) “I stare at him, I can’t think what else to do” – unsure how to act how to
defend herself? Emotionally exhausted?
 Man in a position of authority, complete control of Claire. “Roll it down now” demanding, expecting for her to almost ‘obey’
his commands. Sexist community?
 Ignores her. “please…I have to go”. Pleading, distraught but feelings ignored.
 Women’s voices unheard? “he isn’t listening”
 All she can see is the evil in men, their inner twisted fantasies. Good “he looks at my breast, my legs.” Unable to escape
the fate Susan faced? Sees it everywhere around her. Evidence of paranoia?
 Again imaging herself in Susan’s position, would Stuart have helped her? Small and weak under the power of a man.
 Evidence of almost disrespect and belittling “hey, sugar” as if she is his possession?
 Patronising and invasive, foreigner attempting to comfort her. good
 Within the church, very observant. Descriptive language, result of feeling uncomfortable and out of place in her new setting.
Pointless information and details given. “boy in…yellow short-sleeved shirt” and “nice blond man in a ice dark suit”
 Yet no description about the casket. Just “like the others, I go past the casket” suddenly detached.
 “My head swims”- unable to deal with the news they found the person who killed Susan. No, support around her. “I put out
my hand” nothing but “a parking meter” able to support her.
 Again almost defensive, like when she convinces herself and the reader of her husband’s initial innocence. “They have
friends, these killers. You can’t tell” image what it is like for them, experience all she has. Not all those associated with the
criminals are criminals themselves, can be almost victims.
 Another emotional side to her description no longer in the documentary style. Window into her emotions.
 Back to being the dutiful wife. I machine her husband can turn on and off as he pleases.
 Again passionless “before dean comes. Hurry”
 Distanced again both in her descriptions but with her husband. “I can’t hear a thing.”
 Unaware of her surroundings, numb to everything.
Meaning/ interpretation
Evidence from the text
What sense of the married relationship do you have? For instance…





Is it conventional?
Is it satisfying?
Is it predictable?
Is it strong?
Is it equal?
The marriage seems to be very conventional, the husband being the one who goes to work and the wife staying at home
to be with her son. Although the marriage’s appearance conforms to traditional values of what a marriage should be like,
the reality of their everyday life is far from joyful. There are no substantial link of communication between the man end
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the woman, because every time she tries to find out what goes on the fishing trip, her husband replies with “You’re going
to get me riled.” Therefore, the bond between husband and wife has no strength, they are only together because official
papers and a roof make it so, Do not go this far away from the text, so that you’re making things up…and the
predictability of their everyday routine (the man goes to work in the morning, the woman making breakfast) serves as a
guise for normalcy, when in fact the two of them are avoiding each other. This is much better.
What sense of the woman do you have? For instance…
 Is she well- educated?
The woman comes across to me as someone who comes from an average middle class
 Is she smart?
background (maybe she only finished high school -or college- but doesn’t work so she can
 Is she confident?
be a full time wife and mother), who does her chores and daily routines to keep the peace of
 Is she assertive?
her household and present a peaceful life for her son (“…I ask Dean if he wants more milk,
 Is she dutiful?
more toast,”). The fact that she goes to attend the drowned girl’s funeral without telling her
 Is she rational?
husband about it seems a little declaration of independence on her part, that she can still
have a section of her life that belongs to her and no one else, something that needs no one’s
permission to do.
Who might be the ‘you’ addressed by the narrative voice?




the general reader
a close female friend
of the narrator
a marriage guidance
counselor
a psychiatrist

Misogyny, rather than
merely some pretty
callous men?

Derangement, rather
than merely a very
distressed woman?
The ‘you’ addressed by the narrative voice seems to be a psychiatrist. Note that she
explains her experiences to the utmost detail, including the sex and the disgust towards her
husband. These things may be demanded by the psychiatrist so he/she can analyze her
problem appropriately. Also, the impassioned and morose way she documents her life in the
story serves as a sign of her frustration and impending breakdown (“I close my eyes and
hold on to the sink. Then I rake my arm across the drain board and send the dishes to the
floor”). She may use the psychiatrist to help her or just so that she can have someone to talk
to about the drowning since her husband is so unresponsive.
Might it be argued that Carver’s story is about…
At first impression the woman may seem as only distressed by the events that her husband
has gotten himself into avoid American slang like this: avoid slang altogether (tragic
drowning, death of a young girl), but there is a deeper reason that is unexplained by the
woman as she records the surface of her day to day life: Why wouldn’t the men have gotten
help as fast as possible when it is a human body that they unearthed? When the woman
questions the innocence of her husband and his friends, why is she the one being seen as
unreasonable?
This is the cause of her derangement, and misogyny is the probable answer for the men’s
actions: the human body is only a woman’s; it is not worth discontinuing an anticipated
fishing trip since they would have reported her to the authorities after they finished anyway.
Besides, she’s already dead.
12
Meaning/ interpretation
Evidence from the text
What sense of the married relationship do you have? For instance…





Is it conventional?
Is it satisfying?
Is it predictable?
Is it strong?
Is it equal?






















Major observation of relationship, two intense for both Claire and Stuart to
have control of the relationship. Constant power shifts during the story,
varying moments.
Doesn’t really appear functional to begin with, appears unequal and
unbalanced. With the woman almost serving her husband and reacting on a
very monotone level. “he chews, arms on the table, and stares”
Seems to notice everything he does, but he seems unaware of her work,
feelings and even presence.
Seems to suppress her emotions.
An early description appears to be tension between them.
Husband appears really dismissive and domineering “what are you staring at me for?”
Seems to be on a lower platform than her husband.
Possible fractured relationship, communication breakdown, avoiding talking with each other
Allowing emotions to bottle up and then soon explode.
“takes his cigarettes and goes out to the back with a can of beer”- dealing with emotions with
a beer and cigarettes rather than his wife
“I close my eyes and hold on to the sink. Then I rake my arm across the drainboard and send
the dishes and send the dishes on the floor” frustration rage. Unable to confide in her
husband, appears isolated and alone.
“He doesn’t move. I know he’s heard” doesn’t seem a supportive marriage. Consumed in their own frustrations
and fears, unaware of the need of each other.
Appears dutiful wife. Defends her men when they return form their fishing trip after finding Susan’s body.
Defensive tone. “They are decent men, family men, men who take care of their jobs”- trying to convince herse
that her husband is not to blame for anything.
Even when they are making love, appears passionless, distanced and disconnected. “I turned and opened my
legs.” Truth about their relationship undeniable during such an act, Claire very much unsatisfied and belittled.
Simply treated like his possession, used for his enjoyment when required.
Only physical connection completely stripped of any emotion in a highly emotive act. “put his heavy arms
around me and rubbed his big hands on my back”
When she recalls events of the fishing trip, she only uses “they, these” almost trying to remove the men from
any personal connection with her.
Afraid of the men became on the trip? Unable to picture herself married to such an animal.
At times conventional relationship, defending the man she is married to “they had nothing to hide…they
weren’t ashamed”
Many times, seems a very one sided relationship. With Claire doing all the talking and yearning for Stuart to
connect, expect when making love. Euphemisms often lead to imprecision or worse. Shows concern for Stuart
and a connection “I woke up when I heard him in the kitchen”
Claire seems to have more control of the relationship when they are driving in the car. Appears more
independent, almost disobeying him when he tells her to stop questioning him.
Really sense of distance between them however “there’s nothing I can say to him”
Real distrust sees another side to her husband and pictures herself at his mercy “I look at the creek. I’m right in
it, eyes open, face down, staring at the moss on the bottom, dead”
13











Is she well- educated?
Is she smart?
Is she confident?
Is she assertive?
Is she dutiful?
Is she rational?
the general reader
a close female friend
of the narrator
a marriage guidance
counselor
a psychiatrist
Misogyny, rather than
merely some pretty
callous men?
What sense of the woman do you have? For instance…
 Claire appears dutiful to her husband, around him she somehow loses her own identif
and becomes the machine operated by her husband. - “I turned and opened my legs.”
And “before dean comes. Hurry”
 Robbed of any feeling
 House hold duties, set up seem really archaic. With Claire doing all the house hold
jobs and Stuart ‘brings home the bacon’ so to speak think harder and find an
appropriate expression…“here’s coffee, eggs’ll be ready in a minute”
 She doesn’t seem confident but rather, strong able to stand alone if that means
protecting her morals and principles. E.g. by going to the funeral alone
 However she appears more insignificant and small in the presence of her husband.
 She seems irrational towards the end of the text, almost as if she is gradually breaking
down over the course of the story.
 Evidence of paranoia clear when she is driving to the funeral. On edge “ I grip the
wheel until my fingers hurt”
 Strong sense of fear of men. Seems to have experience some oppression from them
and is aware of their strength and control over women. Women at mercy of the men
 Strong sense of Motherly affection however. Gentle and caring towards her son.
Contrasting to her view of the older men.
 Almost enjoying the time he is innocent and naive. Waiting for the men of her
community to soon corrupt him, turning out just like them?
 I think Claire is smart because she is really aware of her surroundings and her limits
with those around her. Especially during a time where emotions are running high. Sh
knows her place however I feel that the men in her life have put her there and made
sure she stayed there.
Who might be the ‘you’ addressed by the narrative voice?
o Still really unsure of the ‘you’.
o Carries importance for the story
o Definitely not a general reader
o Not intimate enough for a close friend, not distanced enough for a marriage counselor
o Further research required ??
Strange medium to personal for a general ‘you’ but the reader is still a foreigner/outsider to
her feelings and that of her family. Keeps and cold distant at times.



Might it be argued that Carver’s story is about…
We are never really given any real insight into why the men behaved like they did on
their ‘boy’s weekend’. We are never given a window into any of the men’s minds lik
we have into Claire’s.
Seems they were so consumed in their activities that they were like foreigners in their
own bodies. Unable to explain their actions even to themselves after the event.
However I feel that Carver is making more of a statement about the treatment of
women by men in his short story. Beautifully illustrating their inferiority to men and
their vulnerability. Their purity and motherly touch. While exposing the men of their
often, cruel treatment derogatory treatment of them.
14

Derangement, rather
than merely a very
distressed woman?
o The story dances on the fine line between distress and madness. It plays on the
emotions it evokes and I think that’s what makes the story so powerful.
o Overall I think it says more about people’s acceptance and thoughts on grief and
mental illness. Becoming more aware of the different ways of grieving ect. Aaaargh!
o At times, the story plays up the paranoia aspect of the characters. E.g. Claire in the ca
however, overall it doesn’t focus on the break down of a women, but merely illustrate
the emotional trauma people under go all thought-out life.
o It leaves the reader wondering if the characters will ever fully recover fromtheir
experiences and does indeed question the mental stability of many of the characters,
but again this is not the under pinning message of the story.
I think you really only know about the narrator…I think that’s one of the big diffs between
this and the film.
Notes on comparisons
The short story So much water so close to home gives no account of how ‘the girl’ was murdered, or who she was. She
has no name, no face no story-she simply is, or, more accurately, was. The film Jindabyne, by contrast, begins with the
girl’s murderer, who reappears throughout the film- on the beach, with Susan O’Connor’s car, in the church, in his
truck following Claire-his presence suggests that death is looming over everyone in the town. The character of Susan
O’Connor explores the attitudes of individuals within the town. I don’t think this quite says what you mean it to. Her
indigenous origins spark accusations? questions of racism on the part of the fishing group, with some questioning
whether they would have acted differently had Susan been white. Claire also accuses Stewart of sexism, saying that if
Susan had been a boy, he would have taken her out of the water and covered her up. Lawrence’s adaptation portrays
the situation as being far more complex than Carver’s more contained story.
While Carver’s story primarily deals with the individual experience of one woman, Jindabyne extrapolates
Claire’s experience to those of the other women in the town. Each of the women have different views, different ways
of coping. Perhaps as a result of the changes in traditional social structures over time, Billy and Elissa’s relationship is
more equal, more of a partnership, than those of the other couples. Elissa is very much her own person, yet she and
Billy are very close, and after the incident they ‘stayed up all night talking about it’. While the other men leave their
women at home without a backward glance, Billy and Elissa keep in touch, and, unlike Claire and Stewart, the incident
seems to bring them closer together rather than driving them apart. Good. Give me a sense of the filmic
experience…remind me of how it looks and sounds to convey these ideas…
The men in the short story are portrayed as callous, uncaring, beer-and-whisky-drinking males, who fish over a
dead body. The men of Jindabyne, however, are more complex, more diverse. In the film, the discovery of the body is
shown, rather than simply recounted by Claire. The audience is shown the mens’ horror upon discovering the body,
their deliberation over what to do, and their reflections upon, and regret of, their actions. Too imprecise…a terrific
opportunity to pin it to the wall…give me a rendition of the visual experience
Through the women, Lawrence explores (leave out the definite articles to make it sound less precise, more
impressionistic…) changes in attitudes towards, and expectations of, women with each generation. Vanessa comes
from a generation in which women were more likely to endure, to put up with annoyances without complaint, and she
conveys these expectations to Claire- Vanessa overrides her with regard to the children, and she and Stewart make
decisions without consulting Claire. There is a moment of clarity for Vanessa isn’t there though, when Stewart’s
appalling behaviour touches her as well as Claire…the clear parallel when the aboriginal woman tells the boy to ‘leave
[Claire] alone’ and is obeyed, whereas Vanessa is ignored by Stewart …
As the film progresses, Claire becomes more empowered and smashes the vase, a despised family heirloom, and with it
rules and expectations of previous generations. Carmel also begins to assert herself as a woman after the fishing trip.
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Stewart makes a racial slur, and Rocco punches him in defence of Carmel. Carmel becomes angry, telling Rocco “I can
look after myself”. Like Claire, Carmel wants what Elissa has- independence and autonomy.
Some great insights here and if you support them with an analysis of the filmic strategies you’ll be doing very well!
Confrontation between Claire and Stewart’s mother.
Jindabyne running sheet and commentary
Fishing trip- ‘No women allowed’- Issues of gender,
equality, relationships and the generational differences
(again…) It’s at the centre of it, isn’t it?
Murderer in truck and girl in car- not seen in short story
Stewart takes Tom fishing- shown to be human, caring,
complex, not a one-dimensional male who tied the body to
the tree as in short story. This impression is a result of the
way the voice presents his actions.
Stewart finds Susan
Debate over what to do with her The men seem horrified,
not callous and uncaring as they are portrayed in the short
story.
Caylin-Calandria missing
Claire, Jude, Carmel- discuss children Claire conceals her
pregnancy- issue of women ??
Issue of Claire leaving after Tom was born
Jude and her daughter- becomes angry
Relations between the women are explored- rift between
Claire and Carmel and Jude- different generations. Where is
Elissa? Jude, Claire, Carmel-the women left behind. Elissaequal with Billy. Good. And Carmel even bakes a cake!!
Tom brings home fish, Claire becomes angry- Claire is
flawed too- leaving after Tom was born etc.
Claire at doctors’
Petrol station-Stewart, Rocco, Billy- Stewart ageing,
vulnerable, men portrayed as decent and hardworking- more
so than in the short story. Generational gap between
individuals within the group- their differing habits and
values are explored.
Fishing trip
Image of fish on rock- powerlessness
School- Jindabyne song and film
Caylin-Calandria and Tom sacrifice guinea pig
Claire arrives after Tom and C-C are caught. C-C reinforces
the eerie theme of death- transcends the murderer in his
truck- the children are also dealing with death
Billy announces he is leaving- he seems more affected by the
situation than the others- is it his age? His generation? His
views towards women?
Body in river-left behind like the other women
Claire and Stewart’s mother argue about Tom’s punishmentdifferent generations, conflicting expectations of women and
differing values. I like the way you’ve expressed this idea
here. It is not specific…a bit indefinite.
Claire and Tom swimming- Murderer approaches Tom- he
is omnipresent. The depiction of the murder shows him to
be the one truly to blame, not Stewart or the other men. His
presence suggests death looming over everyone- it could
strike at any time. Are you sure it is the same man?
Tom and C-C with dead bird-like C-C’s mother and Susan
O’Connor, the victims are the innocent
Truck man in kitchen, he has Susan’s car That’s a little bit
creepy…
Murderer with woman’s body- the audience is constantly
reminded of the murder and the murderer- presents the
whole picture- the girl was murdered before the men
arrived- this man is to blame, not Stewart & Co.
Stewart returns home
Police arrive
“We don’t step over bodies to enjoy our leisure activities”
‘The whole town’s ashamed of you” The bigger picture is
shown in the film- the implications for the whole town,
community/ society?? not just Claire and Stewart.
Dinner before the fishing trip- The Last Supper?.... Tension
when grandmother arrives with children. The film is more
complex- Claire and Stewart had issues before the fishing
trip.
Stewart and Carl- “do you think we did the right thing by
that girl?” They are shown to be considering their actions,
more so than in the short story
Morning of the fishing trip- Billy is different fromStewart
and Carl. His relationship with Elissa is more equal, more of
a partnership than the other men’s relationships with their
women.
Tom asks Stewart questions.
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Claire and Stewart- “There was nothing anybody could do
for her”-Stewart is depicted as being more compassionate
than in the short story- but he still does not feel ashamed.
Claire collects money and offers it to Susan’s family
Claire goes to church to offer the cheque to the priest
Murderer in church- we are constantly reminded of him
Newspaper- “men fish over dead body”
Claire sees Susan’s body- cut around her ankle from Stewart
tying her to a tree Physical manifestation of the damage they
did- the murderer killed Susan, but Stewart made it worse
Tom and C-C by the river
Pregnancy termination
Claire comes home- Stewart’s mother has moved back in
Claire and Stewart fight- Stewart shows his brutal side
Billy leaves- he and Elissa are much more united than the
other couples- they come closer together rather than drifting
apart.
Claire – ‘I think we should go, all of us, together’
News report- Claire confronts Stewart about tying Susan to
a tree
Smashes vase- vase symbolised erk the annoyances women of
past generations had to put up with- Claire no longer wants
to put up with anything- to endure as Stewart’s mother’s
generation were expected to.
Claire wants Stewart to come to Susan’s memorial
Suggestion that she may leave again- Stewart- “Nobody is
taking my boy” ??? what is the dignificance of this?
Fishing group ostracised by town
Stewart etc complain to the police.
Claire driving
Murderer in truck behind her- déjà vu… are women all the
same to him?
She pulls over, he drives away what is it about her that
makes him leave her alone, disinclined to prey on her?
Claire and Carmel argue- ‘Claire, this isn’t about you’
‘it’s about all of us’ – it’s about the
women, and how they have to speak out against what the
men- their men- have done. Good
Stewart, Rocco, Carl – ‘Claire’s left me again’
Rocco- ‘I reckon you’ve got it wrong’
Stewart and Claire in park- ‘There was nothing we could do’
Claire smashes taboos again and shouts in public I think the
gesture that Stewart makes to the other men is more
interesting…
Claire arrives at memorial
Stewart, Carl, Rocco, Tom, C-C arrive
Stewart apologises to Susan’s father They all want to make
things right, unlike in the short story, where they accept no
responsibility for the situation. You don’t know whether
they do or not. You only have the focus on the narrator…
Claire, Tom and C-C go to Susan’s family’s house- the door
is closed Cultural divide- the door is closed between Susan’s
people and the rest of the town. There is no communication.
Claire with funeral money box- “When a bad thing happens,
we have to do a good thing, no matter how small” …
Man in truck again- he has learned nothing… is his next
victim just around the corner?
Barbecue- Rocco punches Stewart
Carmel- ‘I can take care of myself” – she does not want to
be sheltered as a woman- she wants independence
Useful work!
Practice Transformations and Adaptations Piece
“In his adaptation of So Much Water So Close To Home, Lawrence transforms Carver’s story, which presents the monologue
of a disturbed and distressed woman, into a filmic exploration of the way individuals’ attitudes can be challenged and
changed.”
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Carver’s short story So Much Water So Close to Home, because it is told from one woman’s viewpoint, only illustrates
clearly the challenge and change of one person’s attitudes. Claire’s attitude towards her husband Stuart is changed, resulting
in her performing all her “wifely” duties – cooking, sex – because she feels obligated obliged, not because she loves him.
However, the film Jindabyne has much more depth. All the characters can be viewed and scrutinised, their words and
actions analysed and discussed. Therefore, some aspect of their attitudes can be deduced from those same words and actions,
and the ways in which their attitudes are challenged and changed can also be analysed and scrutinised. However, some
attitudes are challenged but not changed – either the film does not portray the change in the characters’ perception of the
world and its inhabitants, or their attitudes are so firmly ingrained that no amount of evidence to the contrary can ever
dislodge them. This is all getting a bit turgid. Keep it simple as you capture your reader’s attention. I started to feel a bit
giddy.
Claire, the main character of the film, has her attitudes towards her family, friends, town and life itself challenged almost
throughout the film. The most dramatic change, however, is in Claire’s attitude towards Stewart. You haven’t mentioned
change in the earlier sentence…the two sentences don’t seem to cohere. While certain aspects of their marriage seem strained
in the beginning of the film, Claire appears to respect and trust Stuart. She doesn’t believe that he could ever do such a thing
as leave a girl’s body floating in a river for two days – but he does. The catalyst for the change is the fact that he didn’t tell
her about the body until he had to. But Claire’s faith in Stewart is not completely gone. She tells Tom that the men “took her
out of the water, wrapped her up in a sleeping bag and made her nice and warm and cosy” – and Stewart didn’t correct her. It
is only when Claire views Susan’s body and is shown the cuts at her ankle that she finds out the truth. Stewart’s actions
towards Claire also influence the change in her attitude towards him – especially his attitude towards her mental wellbeing,
believing that she might “make” herself sick again, and telling her that she “isn’t exactly behaving rationally at the moment”.
Eventually, Claire can’t even bear Stewart touching her, and tells him, when going to the funeral, that she’d be “away for a
while”. At the end of the film, no conclusion is perceivable – Stewart pleads “I want you to come home Claire.”, but she
doesn’t respond.
Not every attitude( it would be better to situate these attitudes in particular people) in Jindabyne is challenged and changed
for the worse. When Susan’s family appear on the news they immediately accuse the men of being racist – “I wonder what
would’ve happened if she were white.” – and for a while divisions are definite and defiant. Carmel is angry that Rocco didn’t
tell her the girl was a “blackfella”, why? and there are various acts of violence and vandalism towards the men and their
property – especially the huge, spray painted “white hate crimes” on the service station. When Claire takes the children to
Susan’s family’s house and knocks on the door she has it slammed in her face. Again, when Claire tries to give the money she
raised for Susan’s funeral to the O’Connor women, she is scorned and rejected , despite her earnest assurances that “It isn’t
charity.” The woman’s response is quiet but proud – “You trying to buy something then?” Yet when Claire arrives at the
smoke service and is accosted by the young man, telling her to “piss off”, the women defend her – or at least allow her to
stay. “Leave her alone boy,” the older women command, and he retreats. When Stewart apologises to Susan’s father, the man
strikes Stewart and spits on the ground, yet still allows all the whites to stay. Also, Carmel takes Tom to walk through the
smoke “so the spirits won’t stick to us.” While the rest of the Aboriginal community’s reaction isn’t so inclusive, there is a
sense of tolerance, of a mournful acceptance. They are no longer turned away. I’d like a bit more analysis as you go through
these points…always be on the lookout for tendencies to tell the story…
Jude’s implied back story – that of a daughter dead long before her time and a grand daughter longing only for her mother –is
not dwelled on. Jude is of a certain generation of Australian women – and men – who have little faith in the powers of
counselling and downplay? the profound effect of a mother’s death upon a child. She is of the “she’ll be right” school of grief
management – and child rearing – with an implied belief that family are the most important factor in getting over a death,
given her dismissal of Carmel’s advice about counselling. And throughout the film she simply treats all of CaylanCalandria’s attempts to deal with her grief as the acts of an incredibly naughty child – Jude is furious when she discovers
Caylan-Calandria with a photo of herself and her mother, fails to see the psychological reasons behind the sacrificed guinea
pig, immediately assumes the worst of her granddaughter whenever something happens. And her attitude towards her granddaughter is not really changed by her grand-daughter – it is changed by her husband, Carl: “It’s not her fault that she’s alive
and our girl’s dead.” Jude suddenly sees how her anger towards Caylan-Calandria is just a way to not have to bear the
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incredible sadness of “people dying in the wrong order.” At the funeral service Jude and Caylan-Calandria both farewell their
daughter and mother, respectively – Caylan-Calandria whispers “Be gone” into the rising smoke, and her grandmother echoes
her firmly. So…where does this fit in to your overall argument about the adapatation?
However, some attitudes of characters in Jindabyne are not changed, despite how many times they are challenged. Carl is a
prime example – a middle aged, fat, balding man who finds fault in everything and everybody else. His homophobia is
especially illustrated in this film, starting with his joke at the start of the fishing trip – “Three beautiful women walk into a
bat…A blonde, a brunette and a lesbian.” and his response to Billy’s question: “What colour was the lesbian’s hair?” “How
the f**k do I know? Blue?” After finding out Elissa used to be a lesbian, Carl only refers to her as “the lesbian”, leading to
Caylan-Calandria calling Elissa a “dyke” and the ensuing complications ???. And because Billy and Elissa left Jindabyne
before the conclusion of the film, there is no way of knowing whether Carl’s attitude towards Elissa, or homosexual people in
general, is ever changed.
In So Much Water So Close to Home, the narrator’s attitude towards her husband is challenged and changed, but the only
consequence that is perceivable is to do with her living a life of duty with a man she used to love. Stuart still gets what he
wants, and Dean is too young to immediately notice and difference. And no one else is really mentioned in the story upon
which the narrator’s attitude will have an effect. Yet in Jindabyne, everyone is affected by everything. All of the characters
are connected, however much they try to fight it. It’s hard to avoid anyone in that town, even harder to ignore resounding
resentment and long-simmering hate. Every individual in Jindabyne was confronted by the men’s actions, and everyone’s
attitudes were challenged. Some were even changed. But none of that can help Susan.
This is comprehensive and interesting, but I think your use of the terms of the topic- the men’s actions resulted in challenges
to the attitudes and values of many people and changed some of them (approx) leads you into a consideration of successive
individual characters and doesn’t prompt you to examine the views and values of the text/s as a whole…
PRACTICE SAC: Adaptations and Transformations
“In his adaptation of So Much Water So Close to Home, Lawrence transforms Carver’s story, which presents the
monologue of a disturbed and distressed woman, into a filmic exploration of the way individual’s attitudes can be
challenged and changed.” Discuss.
Unlike the short story So Much Water So Close to Home,that is contained to one relationship and one woman’s
perceptions and repression, the film Jindabyne highlights how women raise awareness of their men and how
women and men develop through interaction. There’s no template but you do need to orient your reader in some
way. The filmic exploration allows for new issues to be introduced through a complex web of relationships. Issues
of sexism and generation distinction are also established. It is not a philosophic masterpiece; the director has
deliberately used an isolated country town with ordinary people to convey his interpretation to the audience. I don’;
know that this sentence adds much…
Carver’s story is crafted with matter of fact statements, simple sentence structure and packed with
subtext, through which he skilfully portrays Claire’s derangement. There is a suggestion that the deeply troubled
Claire speaking to a psychologist Yet beyond Carver’s clever crafting, the story is limited in that Claire is unable to
articulate the nature of her oppression. The film facilitates this what?due to its larger scope. She is not deranged
and has overcome her post-natal depression demons. Several added scenes illustrate her desire to make things right
after the men’s lapse in moral judgement, such as viewing the body at the mortuary, visiting Susan’s family or
raising money for Susan’s funeral. In contrast, Carver’s story makes Claire’s voice sounds impossibly? helpless.
The film alters the meaning of what?; she is not suspicious of Stewart for committing murder, but is heavily critical
of his morality. Although Stewart initially doesn’t understand what he’s done wrong, Claire’s outrage is
instrumental in raising his awareness of how immoral and disgraceful his actions were, especially when she
indicates her intention of leaving him for good. Stewart’s dramatic transformation of attitude is highlighted by his
attendance at the indigenous memorial service. Claire’s voice sounds anxious and afraid: ‘They had nothing to
hide. They were not ashamed.’ But Claire does not hesitate to tell Stewart what she thinks, ‘…you are piss-weak.’
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The film establishes how women raise awareness of their men through Billy and Elyssa’s relationship.
Firstly, Elyssa comes from beyond the Jindabyne enclave, with different social influences. In contrast to Claire and
Stewart’s relationship, these two lovers are not traditionally married and are more open with each other; Elyssa had
no qualms about disclosing her past lesbian relationship and she and Billy stayed up all night discussing the events
of his fishing weekend. They are significantly younger than the other couples, which introduces the issue of
generation distinction. Elyssa is not a control freak too slangy but a catalyst for change; she rouses awareness in
Billy that Jindabyne and its small-town, homophobic, sexist mentality is no place to bring up their child.
Carver’s story only mentions the names of the other men, whereas detailed scenes in the film explore the masculine
relationships and bring the characters to life. Not sure what this means. Lawrence provides insights into their
interactions as males and their personal beliefs and attitudes concerning woman. To begin with the film portrays
the men as chauvinist is a bit slangy…idiomatic- think of the French! , primarily through their boys-only, sexist
annual fishing trip. I think you need to explain how these suggestions are made or built through the film…Other
examples include the men’s sexist remarks when a good-looking girl arrives at the petrol station. When Claire
questions whether Stewart would have acted the same way had he discovered a boy, it suggests that he treats
women like a piece of meat. Whether or not the men ‘got-off’ on the power they had over a dead Aboriginal
woman’s body, as is suggested by the policewoman it is clear that aside from initial shock they continued their
fishing trip almost without any regard for their discovery. Much of the emotive force in the short story resonates
from the documentary-like detail and systematic listing of events, specifically with the account of the fishing trip.
Yet the transformation from prose to film makes the fishing trip a detailed visual experience for the reader, which
evokes intense emotion in whom? Us or the men??and subsequent questioning of their morality by the audience.
At least twice during the trip, the camera zooms out to show a mise en scene of the men, which enables
introspection into male bonding (sexist and homophobic jokes, drinking, fishing) that the short story could not
communicate; we are seeing things from their perspective. I’d like you to spend more time exploring the mise en
scene…what is in the frame…remind me. Billy’s departure is a turning point for the relationship between the men;
he provides the reality check that they can no longer excuse their behaviour or attitudes and must seek to apologise
and redeem themselves.I’m not sure which of Billy’s departures you mean?
Shifting the focus from Claire’s perspective in Carver’s story to the wider community of Jindabyne draws greater
attention not only to the men’s lack of morality but also issues of indigenous relations and small town mentality.
The film introduces broader social issues of race and multiculturalism. Good The setting of Jindabyne is pertinent;
the beautiful full-screen camera shots of the wilderness serve two purposes. Firstly, it creates a sense of isolation in
a similar way to Carver , whose first person narrative, limits the perspective Secondly, the pristine scenery creates
a contrast because (a) this is not a convention of the literary discussion.)how could such a horrific murder occur in
this environment and b) how could these ‘good, decent men’ behave so disrespectfully against the backdrop of
beauty? You should recast this so that the questions become statements. The director’s use of an eerie, mystic
soundtrack throughout the film is also important as it evokes a heightened sense of fear that accompanies the brutal
murder and fears of a psychotic serial killer. Can you elaborate on this a bit more?
The consciousness of a community is raised, with people in Jindabyne outraged and disgusted at the men’s
behaviour. Avoid sounding like we are aware of the whole community’s response. The film creates scenes to
emphasise how far-reaching the consequences are, as shown by the evocative newspaper heading ‘Men fish over
body,’ the staring faces in the pharmacy in conjunction with the slightly comical grilling by the police ‘you’re a
bunch of idiots!’ The media frenzy and subsequent mention on national news challenges Stewart and his mates
attitudes on responsibility; they realise their excuse that ‘she was dead, there was nothing anybody could do,’
which had its genesis in the short story, has no credibility.
The fact that the woman found was Aboriginal sparked widespread animosity and hatred between two
communities. The film emphasises the separation through scanning shots of the outback that link Jindabyne to the
O’Conner family’s house. Develop this idea more.The convention of 1st person narrative in the story took account
of Claire’s inner thoughts exclusively and provided no wider scheme to help justify her outrage and repression.
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Good. I think this idea would bear more discussion. It could be used to frame the rest of your argument if it were
at the beginning. ?? However the film introduces strong undertones of multiculturalism.. The director strategically
placed the characters into a Jindabyne melting pot, to suggest that at the end of the day they are all humans and
must relate to each other and face their morality regardless of St Brigid, spirituality, etc. This idea is worth
exploring more. This wider scheme justifies outrage against immorality and lack of humanity. Explain more
carefully. You’re not giving enough space to some most interesting points.
The small-town mentality of Jindabyne facilitates- better word? the inability for people to accept Claire’s
illness. She constantly has to prove her stability to both her husband and interfering mother in law: ‘Yep, just like
old times.’ The quote doesn’t make sense as you have it here. You need to contextualise it moreIt seems as if Claire
has no credibility within her own family; Stewart essentially blames her for Tom’s inability to swim, on account of
her absence during his vital learning years. The lack of understanding of her illness extends to Jude, who stated that
Claire left her family, her tone making it sounds like Claire had a choice:‘You don’t make yourself sick. It’s
something…bad that happens to you.’ Again, you need to contextualise the quote so that your reader understands
its significance.
Both forms of this text – they’re different texts…not just different forms…end with a sense of resolution, however
in the film the meaning has been transformed to accommodate the issues that Lawrence wished to convey through
his use of film. In the short story, Claire’s derangement came from her intense suspicion that Stuart was involved
in a murder, I don’t know about that??? thus Carver cited that the murderer had been charged to resolve the issue
and lay guilt on Claire. Claire thinks that all men are capable of murder and rape, in the Carver story… Yet in
Lawrence’s version, the serial killer is introduced from the outset, so the audience does not perceive the men as
potential killers, but as those who lacked moral responsibility. Instead, he resolves the trust/understanding issues
between Claire and Stewart, bridges the separation between two communities and the grief issues surrounding
Caylin-Calandria, Jude and Carl. Resolution in the film highlights the challenges and changes in the attitudes of
individuals and their relationships; the short story’s resolution does nothing to solve Claire’s guilt other than end
with perplexing, dutiful sex.
This is a very wide ranging discussion that has some very interesting moments but it has so much going on that I
think it is a bit thin. To do justice to your ideas- especially in a double period- you should try to focus on one or
two scenes or elements of the film and line these up more directly with comparable elements of the short story. For
instance,I think the third last paragraph could do with more elaboration and it would be useful if you offered a
more extended discussion of the short story…go into some more detail; use the notes you have that provide your
analysis and include some of that detail…
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