Ms. Balaska & Ms. Wales
English II
Name: ________________________________
Personal Essay
Personal essays allow you to share your life with others and vicariously experience the
things that happen around you.
What is it?
Personal essays are told from a defined point of view, often the writer’s. The writer
uses feelings and details in order to get the reader involved in the sequence of events.
Has an introduction, with a main idea statement, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
Personal essays rely on personal experience.
What is its
purpose?
Personal essays are filled with carefully selected details (separate the necessary from
the unnecessary) that explain, support, and enhance your writing. All of your details
MUST relate to the belief statement.
 Title
 Introduction (with belief statement)
 Body paragraphs (minimum of 3)
 Conclusion
Format
 12 point font
 Times New Roman
 1 inch margins
 Double-spaced
 Proper MLA heading
Ms. Balaska & Ms. Wales
English II
Name: ________________________________
Personal Essay
RUBRIC
TOPIC: _____________________________________________
You will receive two grades for this assignment: 100 possible points for your essay and 50
possible points for the writing process. You must use turnitin.com to submit your essay.
Rubric:
Introduction: Main
Idea Statement
You main idea statement clearly focuses on your chosen writing
prompt.
Body paragraphs:
Evidence &
Connections
You use real-life connections, relevant facts, details, and
explanations in order to support your main idea statement.
Essay Elements
You maintain a consistent point of view (“I”) and use transitional
words and phrases to establish sequence throughout your essay.
You include all aspects of storytelling: plot, character, setting,
climax, and ending.
_________ / 15
_________ / 40
_________ / 20
Organization: Plot line
You provide a thoroughly developed plot line that includes
major and minor characters and a definite setting.
_________ / 10
Requirements: Format
Your personal narrative is at least 2 pages and follows the
format requirements: 12 pt. font, Times New Roman, 1 inch
margins, double-spaced, title, MLA heading).
_________ / 15
Writing Process:
Prewriting, Outlines &
Drafts
You completed all of the required graphic organizers, outlines,
and completed two-rough drafts.
_________ / 50
Total Essay Points: ______ / 100
Total Writing Process Points: _______ / 50
Ms. Balaska & Ms. Wales
English II
Name: ________________________________
Personal Essay
Pre-Writing & Sample Essays
Essay #1: My First Life Line
Throughout my six years as an elementary school student, I was a helpless victim, drowning in a
sea of stressful book reports and searching for a way to express myself in open-ended questions. As I
entered middle school, however, a life preserver was thrown to me. From the moment it appeared, I held
on tightly until my rescuer taught me to swim on my own.
Mrs. Smith was the high-ranking “officer” at our middle school, whose sole purpose was to
whip her “gifted but undisciplined kids” into shape. I take that back. Introducing sixth-graders to ulcers
was another likely item on her agenda. She had a natural march in her step, setting the admired and ideal
pace for others to follow. Mrs. Smith performed classroom procedures as though she had repeatedly
practiced each one determined to achieve perfection. She was always neat and proper, never a single hair
on her head nor a red pen on her desk out of place. The clarity of her voice demanded respect and
attention, while her tone was often quite frightening. “My class will separate the men from the boys; the
women from the girls; the writers from the dummies.” Despite her intimidating features, I found myself
admiring, even liking this drill sergeant. Her gleaming smile could provide warmth like rays of sunshine
and was always accompanied by some explanatory hand motion. She rarely grinned without providing
some sort of manual or verbal gesture. Mrs. Smith was extremely blunt with her opinions—
complimentary as well as critical ones. She was honest and truthful, with no strings attached. When asked
for help, she would always respond, “I’d love to help you fix the mess you’ve created, so that someday,
you might pass.” Due to the bitingly honest quality of her critiques, I feared the day she would evaluate
one of my papers in class.
Nervously awaiting the return of our first essays my heart thumped with anxiety. Suddenly,
her piercing voice cracked my security shell that had hidden me for the past six years. “Well, I can see that
there is some potential buried beneath all that mumbo-jumbo. The hard part is just digging it out!”
Confused, I searched for the correct response and answered, “Um, Mrs. Smith I don’t have a shovel to dig.”
Of course Mrs. Smith replied, “That’s quite all right. You can use your hands. Pick up that pencil and go to
work.” Until the bell rang, that day, I was lost in a maze of red ink. My goal was to distinguish between
“mumbo-jumbo” writing this and writing that, with editing, and more editing, might become worthy for
Mrs. Smith herself to read. Overwhelmed with excitement, I was determined to receive a “well-written”
comment from Mrs. Smith or at least a “not so mumboy-jumboy!” Sweat, tears, and a lack of sleep were all
included in my “IMPRESS MRS. SMITH MISSION.” Although I was unaware of it at the time, her lovingly
strict attitude and personality had already begun to inspire me.
Mrs. Smith’s sweet perfume danced happily through the air, luring me into her room the
following day at school. Once again, we turned in our essays and awaited the dreaded comments.
Her constant nail tapping was a tension building clock, a constant reminder of the doom that awaited us
all. She always selected her “victims” for each new day, and then focused on her helpless “prey.” With
magnetic eyes, she would irresistibly and forcefully draw students’ attention to her.
With each point of her finger, I waited for her nail to lift me out of my chair and onto my feet.
Eventually, it did. “Well, William,” she always had to recognize the writer before the humiliation could
begin, “I’m quite impressed. You read my ‘red pen advice’ and actually applied it when you rewrote this
paper. I’m really impressed.” At that moment, Ernest Hemingway and Edgar Allen Poe were my equals.
Even Shakespeare himself could not have put my sixth-grade essay to shame. Just because they had
created several masterpieces did not mean they were “Mrs. Smith Approved.” Whose essay had
“impressed” Mrs. Smith? Mine!
I longed to rush across the room, wrap my arms around her, and burst into joyful tears. Did
Ms. Balaska & Ms. Wales
Name: ________________________________
English II
she realize what her words meant to me? I desperately wanted to embrace her. For the first time,
someone had taken time to work with me, guide me, and have faith in me and my ability to write.
She helped me find a writing style suitable and meaningful to me. If only she could understand how I
truly admired and viewed her as a “teacher,” someone who earned and deserved that special title. Words
of praise and gratitude filled my min d as I began to pour my heart out to this miraculous lady. Yet, as a
lump rose in my throat, I simply muttered. “Thanks, Mrs. Smith.” For the first time, without any words,
gestures, or laughter, Mrs. Smith just smiled.
Below, answer the following questions by listening to the essay being read to you.
1. Summarize her belief in one sentence.
2. Describe her background experience that led her to realize this belief in one sentence.
Reaction
Discuss your personal reaction to the essay. Is your belief similar or different?
Ms. Balaska & Ms. Wales
English II
Name: ________________________________
Essay #2:
Next, read the following essay and answer the questions that follow.
By jOjOsfreakingCIRCUS, Brentwood, TN
I can’t forget his eyes. Bloodshot. Dark. Desperate. The first time I saw him, his appearance surprised me
so much that I had to do a quick double-take to make sure that I’d seen correctly.
I had. He stood there, a tall, dark man who looked normal enough neck down, wearing ripped jeans and a
stained sweatshirt, but neck up, he looked like every child’s nightmare. His head was distorted by a huge,
grotesque gash that covered almost half of his face, making one of his eyes droop and causing his
forehead to gape open. The gash started at the back of his scalp, angrily trailing over his head and down
his leathery cheek in a thick, jagged reddish-purple line.
The depressed expression on his face held a hint of jealousy as he intently watched us with carefully
guarded eyes, which were narrowed and angry. I could tell by his dirty face and oily hair that he hadn’t
bathed in a while, and I could tell by the crazed look in his eyes at the sight of Thanksgiving dinner that he
hadn’t eaten for days. Taking a deep breath, I smiled sympathetically at him, took his tray, and asked him
if he wanted gravy with his turkey.
Every Thanksgiving, my youth group and I go to a homeless shelter in downtown Nashville to serve
dinner. We’re told to serve food and clean up their trays, but more importantly, to sit down and have a
conversation with them. After countless trips to the homeless shelter throughout the years, I’ve been able
to talk to many different people and hear what they have to say. From stories of alcoholic husbands who
would abuse their wives to women who had abandoned their kids for drugs, there isn’t a wide variety of
situations that I haven’t already heard of. Though each story is equally heartbreaking, there’s usually
nothing more I can do for them than to hold their hand when they cry and offer a few comforting words.
So when this particular man came up to me while I was wiping a table, I wasn’t expecting anything
radically different, but his story was nothing like the ones I’d heard before.
He casually pulled out a chair next to me and sat down.
“Well hi there. How you doin’ today?” He gave me wry grin, but it didn’t meet his eyes. I offered him a
polite smile, and carefully averted my glance from his head. I replied, “Fine; how are you?” One thing I
couldn’t help noticing was that he kept staring at me with a concentrated look on his face, and though I
thought he would stop after a while, he didn’t. Starting to feel uncomfortable, I carefully turned my head
so I wouldn’t have to look at him.
“I’m…I’m sorry.” He looked down, suddenly embarrassed. “It’s just that for some reason, you remind me
of my daughter.” I immediately looked up. He’d caught my attention, and once he knew it, he continued.
Ms. Balaska & Ms. Wales
Name: ________________________________
English II
“My little girl was nine years old, the only baby me and my wife had. We were all from New
Orleans…lived in a small, run-down house that was real close to the beach. Life ain’t easy down in New
Orleans, but we got by, paid the bills, you know. But then—” he paused. He stared at the floor.
Seconds ticked by, and he remained silent.
“But then… what?” I asked hesitantly. He looked at me.
“Then the weather started getting crazy. Weathermen started getting crazy, predicting crazy things…
God, we should’ve listened. But we didn’t, and before we knew it… the hurricane came. Katrina came…
and stole everything I owned. It stole my wife and my baby. They didn’t make it through. No, hell no, they
didn’t make it. The water busted down the house, and everything fell apart. Just like that. It was there one
second and gone the other. Windows shattered, and God, I can’t forget the screaming. I tried to save them.
I was so close. But they didn’t make it.” He paused, and shakily took a sip of his water, his fingers
trembling slightly.
“You see this on my head?” His voice sounded hoarse. He pointed to the gash while keeping his eyes on
me. “I was trying to get them out of the house, pulling them through the door. But it slammed into my
face. The edge dug into my forehead and busted my head open. Left me like this,” he said bitterly. His
voice trailed into a whisper. “But I didn’t save them. My little girl, my wife, both dead. Now I have nothing.
Nothing at all. Nothing left of me.”
He was quiet for the next few minutes, and as I attempted to comfort him while he tried to hide his tears
from me, all I could do was sit there and ask myself two questions: how can such awful things happen to
good people? Why does anyone deserve to be rewarded for their hard work one day and suddenly have it
all stolen from them the next, leaving them helpless and struggling?
Before I talked with this man, I’d never really understood that a lot of times, disastrous things happen to
people who don’t deserve it, and when they’re in that situation, there’s really nothing they can do but
hold their head up high, hope for the best, and bear through it. Sometimes, people get so frustrated and
angry that they try to blame others for what’s happening to them, and in the end, the situation only
becomes harder, more painful, and lonelier to go through. Awful things can happen to anyone, but it’s
through how he or she handles the situation that people are differentiated, and I’ve learned that in a
difficult situation, people can make one of two choices. The first is to be filled with self-pity and rely on
others to solve their problems for them, and the second is to independently accept the situation and use
the experience to make themselves stronger people.
An example of the second choice is that before Hurricane Katrina, 94% of New Orleans’s population was
employed, and when the hurricane struck, the entire city became helpless and strongly dependent on
others for help. Once life began going back to normal, however, many people chose to begin working
Ms. Balaska & Ms. Wales
Name: ________________________________
English II
when job opportunities arose. Today, the percentage of people employed in New Orleans has risen to
98%. Even after a storm so devastating, New Orleans actually ended up becoming a stronger and more
advanced city than it was before.
This, I believe: Life is unpredictable, and things that seem to happen without a reason sometime feel
impossible to deal with. When someone decides not to let complicated situations control his or her life or
define who he or she is by choosing to keep moving forward, regardless of what may happen, the
outcome is almost always going to be fulfilling.
Later, the man told me that once he raised enough money to pay for a bus ticket, he would get a job with
the Salvation Army and do whatever he could to start his life over. “My wife would’ve wanted it,” he said
quietly, and for the first time all evening, he smiled.
Below, answer the following questions about essay #2.
1. Summarize the author’s belief in one sentence.
2. Describe her background experience that led her to realize this belief in one sentence.
Reaction
Discuss your personal reaction to the essay. Is your belief similar or different?
Ms. Balaska & Ms. Wales
English II
Name: ________________________________
Personal Essay
Practice Writing Body Paragraphs
Directions: Pick 2 of the following prompt options. Using the provided introduction and conclusion,
create the story.
Option 1:
(Intro) This summer, I learned that following the rules can keep me safe.
(Create the story…)
(Conclusion) I’m glad that I learned this lesson and that no one was hurt. Rules aren’t always fun to
follow, but in this case they were made for a good reason.
Option 2:
(Intro) After what happened in ____________ class, I was so embarrassed that I didn’t think I could ever go
back to school. But _________ convinced me I it would be okay.
(Create the story…)
(Conclusion) I hated feeling silly. It was hard ___________, but now I know that I am not the only one who
ever ___________________________.
Option 3:
(Intro) Being new at school is not always fun. Last week when I saw the new girl in our class sitting
alone, I really wanted to sit with her. I almost did but chickened out last minute and sate with my friends.
I wish now that I had been braver.
(Create the story…)
(Conclusion) Everything really did turn out okay in the end. If I ever get another chance to make
someone feel welcome, I know that I will.
Option 4:
(Intro) I always heard that people who laugh at their own mistakes will get everyone else to laugh along
with them. Yesterday, I personally experienced that motto.
(Create the story…)
(Conclusion) I used to never believe the saying “Laugh and the world laughs with you” until I saw my
friends laughing with me. The laughter made me feel better and less embarrassed instead of just clumsy.
Ms. Balaska & Ms. Wales
English II
Name: ________________________________
Personal Essay
Graphic Organizer
Directions: You must complete the graphic organizer BEFORE you begin writing your essay. You must
have your graphic organizer checked off by me before you may begin writing your essay.
Conclusion
Body Paragraphs
Introduction
Personal Essay Topic & Belief:
Set the Context: Develop the reader’s interest . . . state what is happening? When? Where?
Why?
What Happened?
How I felt. What I was thinking.
What Happened?
How I felt. What I was thinking.
What Happened?
How I felt. What I was thinking.
Closure/Insight: What is your new understanding/interpretation?
Ms. Balaska & Ms. Wales
English II
Name: ________________________________
Personal Essay
Outline
What is your topic & belief?
How did you come to this belief about this topic? What events in your life led you to this belief?
Be specific and use details:
1.
2.
3.
Ms. Balaska & Ms. Wales
English II
Name: ________________________________
How do you plan to begin your essay? What is your hook? How will you get your audience
interested?
What lesson(s) have you learned by practicing your belief? Be specific... Tell me how you
incorporate your belief into your everyday life.
Give at least two specific and detailed examples from your life that exemplify your belief. This can
be either:
1) how following your belief has made an positive impact on your life or of the life of those around
you
OR
2) how not following your belief has had a negative impact on your life or the life of those around you.
1)
2)
3)
Ms. Balaska & Ms. Wales
English II
Name: ________________________________
Are there any examples from the world that support your belief? Can you point to anyone else (famous
or not) who follows your beliefs and has made an impact on you? Please be specific in your example
and provide detail that supports your statement.
Why should your audience care about your essay? What can readers learn from your belief?
Ms. Balaska
English I & II
Name: _____________________________