ATTENTION GETTERS At the beginning of your essay, you need to GRAB the reader’s attention and make a point about your position on an issue right away. Here are a few suggestions how. Questions: Ask a question (or series of questions) to get your reader thinking. Do you remember that cartoon with a mighty black prince looked like Denzel Washington? Remember? He rescued the lovely black princess who looked like Halle Berry? Remember how the evil white wizard, an Arnold Schwarzenegger look-alike, got chased by an angry mob of bees? Me neither. Perhaps that’s because African Americans aren’t cast as heroes in cartoons. Quotes: Select a quotation that relates to your topic &helps your position. I once heard a quote that made me laugh. It said, “Love is the history of a woman’s life and an episode in a man’s.” It was the kind of laugh that happens when something isn’t funny, when it’s only true, and it hurts. It hurts because of the women I know, both young and old, who are bright, intelligent, and who have so much going for them, but they still value their relationships with men more than their relationships with themselves and other women. Anecdotes: Tell a short story that is relevant to the topic of your essay to get the reader emotionally tied in to what you are trying to argue. WARNING: Be careful not to get caught up in the anecdote – it must be very short. Am I fat? Look at my thighs. They’re huge. And my hips? Who’s going to like me with this body? “Someday my prince will come,” Cinderella hums in my ear. No prince will claim me as his bride. I’m too ugly. Stepping on that scale in the second grade was the beginning of the end for me. Weighing in at 67 pounds was horrifying. Just like Tinker Bell when she looked into a hand mirror and realized her hips were too big in Peter Pan, I stepped onto the scale and realized I was fat, enormous, disgusting. At least that was the image Tinker Bell helped me paint of myself. Startling facts or statistics from your research (wake-up call): Use shocking information to grab the attention of the reader. Fish with no eyes, fish with skin deformities, and fish with deteriorated fins and bones are being caught in the Columbia River. Soon these mutated fish will pop up all over the western United States. No joke. The government started a program to store nuclear waste on reservation lands volunteered by Native American tribal councils. Write YOUR attention getter (you may use another sheet of paper if you like): ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ WRITING A THESIS STATEMENT After you have your reader’s attention, you need to state your position and introduce your arguments clearly and concisely! You do this in a THESIS STATEMENT. Thesis statement = position statement because argument 1 and argument 2. Example: Position statement: Death Penalty should be abolished. Argument 1: It is cruel and unusual punishment Argument 2: There is the possibility of innocent people being executed. Thesis statement: The death penalty should be abolished because it is cruel and unusual punishment and there is the possibility of innocent people being executed. Write your thesis statement Position statement: _____________________________________________________ Argument 1: __________________________________________________________ Argument 2: __________________________________________________________ Thesis statement: ______________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ WRITING YOUR ROUGH DRAFT: RD Organizer PARAGRAPH 1 - INTRODUCTION Attention Getter:____________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________ Thesis Statement:____________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ PARAGRAPH 2 – ARGUMENT #1 Topic Sentence: _____________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ Evidence 1: ___________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ Evidence 2: ___________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ Evidence 3: ___________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ PARAGRAPH 3 – ARGUMENT #2 Topic Sentence: _____________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ Evidence 1: ___________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ Evidence 2: ___________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ Evidence 3: ___________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ PARAGRAPH 4 – COUNTER ARGUMENT & REBUTTAL Counter Argument: _____________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ Rebuttal:_____________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ PARAGRAPH 5 - CONCLUSION Restate your thesis statement:___________________________________________ ___________________________________________________________________ Attention clencher:_____________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ WRITING YOUR ROUGH DRAFT: The nitty-gritty details Think of YOUR THESIS STATEMENT as a road map for your paper. Just as you built it from your position and your 2 arguments, you break it back down to make the topic sentences for each of your paragraphs. Consider this thesis statement: Gun control does not reduce violent crime because people will find other methods of violence or they will find illegal means of obtaining a gun. Now you have: 1) A clear position on the issue: Gun control does not reduce violent crime. 2) A topic sentence for your first pro paragraph People will find other methods of violence. 3) A topic sentence for your second pro paragraph People will find illegal means of obtaining a gun. THE PARAGRAPH - Characteristics of a good paragraph: * A clear and concise topic sentence * Supporting evidence - supports the argument/topic sentence * Unity - means that all sentences in the paragraph directly support the topic sentence. * Coherenence, which means that all the information of the paragraph is well-organized, logically ordered and easy to follow. This is accomplished by: * Transition words and phrases (see below) INTRODUCING QUOTATIONS: You should incorporate quotations into your writing instead of dropping material into your essay without a smooth connection. Always distinguish your ideas from those of your sources by introducing your quotes. You should use identifying phrases such as "Jones points out that" or “According to Principal Higgins.” Other verbs that you can use are acknowledges, suggests, concludes, insists, predicts, discloses, observes, believes, explains, summarizes, implies, notes, comments, claims, illustrates, reports, warns, admits, finds, concurs, affirms, proposes, speculates, indicates. Without quotation introduction When a school requires uniforms, the entire culture of the school makes a shift. “We had fewer fights and more students going to class on time.” With quotation introduction When a school requires uniforms, the entire culture of the school makes a shift. According to Jim Smith, Principal at Jefferson Charter School (which just switched to uniforms), “we had fewer fights and more students going to class on time.” AFTER you introduce your experts, you do not have to give the full introduction every time. For example “I consider safety an important issue on campus”, notes Smith, “and the uniforms have improved that as well.” THE WONDERFUL WORLD OF TRANSITIONS! Transitions are words which help clarify, explain, and define the relationship between ideas and terms. They enable the reader to see how ideas are related to linked with one another. They make your writing and thought appear more unified. ***TRANSITIONS EXPRESSING ADDITION (AND)*** additionally, also, furthermore, in addition, moreover, too, besides, not to mention ***TRANSITIONS EXPRESSING CONTRAST (BUT)*** however, in contradistinction to, as opposed to, nonetheless, on the other hand, yet, conversely, on the contrary, in contrast to, although, nevertheless ***TRANSITIONS INTRODUCING EXAMPLES*** as a example (illustration), for example, for another example, for instance, in particular, such as, namely, to illustrate, that is ***TRANSITIONS EXPRESSING STAGES OF THOUGHT*** first, second, then, consequently, finally ***TRANSITIONS EXPRESSING A CONCLUSION*** therefore, consequently, in conclusion, to conclude, summing up, accordingly, evidently, in closing, thus, then, on the whole, in sum TRANSITIONS EXPRESSING A CONCESSION as you probably know, certainly, of course, naturally, no doubt, since, even though, because TRANSITIONS EXPRESSING EMPHASIS above all, especially, indeed, in fact, in particular, more importantly, certainly, surely, to repeat, it is clear that TRANSITIONS EXPRESSING QUALIFICATION maybe, perhaps, possibly TRANSITION EXPRESSING REASONS as, because, because of, since, for, a reason for this is TRANSITIONS EXPRESSING A SUMMARY and so, in summary, in other words, in short, to summarize, to sum up *Keep this handout – you WILL use it again, and again, and again