Lola Battle
I Know an Old Teacher
Character
Adapted from a book by Anne Bowen
Illustrated by Stephen Gammell
Student playing the character
Narrator 1
Narrator 2
Child 1
Child 2
Child 3
Teacher
Narrator 1:
Narrator 2:
Child #1:
Child #2:
I know an old teacher who swallowed a flea.
It fell from her hair and plopped into her tea.
Did you see that?
See What?
Child #3:
Miss Bindley swallowed a flea.
A nasty flea? How can that be?
Child #2:
Narrator 1:
Narrator 2:
Child #1:
Child #2:
Child #1:
Child #3:
Child #2:
Narrator 1:
Narrator 2:
Narrator 1:
Narrator 2:
I know an old teacher who swallowed a spider. It crawled down the wall
and then sat down beside her.
She swallowed the spider to gobble the flea that fell from her hair and
plopped into her tea.
I can’t believe it.
Believe what?
Miss Bindley swallowed a spider!
She swallowed a spider RIGHT AFTER the flea?
How CAN that be?
I know an old teacher who swallowed a fish.
It swam down her throat with a swishty-swish.
She swallowed the fish to gobble the spider.
Child #1:
Child #2:
Child #1:
She swallowed the spider to gobble the flea that fell from her hair and
plopped into her tea.
I know YOU saw that!
Saw WHAT?
She swallowed our fish!
Child #3:
A fish, a spider, and a flea?
All Children:
How CAN that be?
Narrator 1:
Narrator 2:
Narrator 1:
Narrator 2:
Child #1:
Child #2:
Child #1:
Child #3:
Child #1:
Child #2:
Child #3:
Narrator 1:
Narrator 2:
Narrator 1:
Narrator 2:
Narrator 1:
Narrator 2:
Child #1:
Child #3:
Child #2:
Child #1:
Child #3:
I know an old teacher who swallowed a RAT. She gulped down that rat in
two seconds flat!
She swallowed the rat to gobble the fish.
She swallowed the fish to gobble the spider.
She swallowed the spider to gobble the flea that fell from her hair and
plopped into her tea.
I can’t look.
Is it BAD?
Miss Bindley swallowed our rat!
A rat, a fish, a spider, a flea! How can that be?
Uh-oh. She’s checking out Jake.
You think she’ll do it?
Swallow a snake?
I know an old teacher who swallowed a snake.
It slid down quite smoothly, like Mom’s chocolate shake.
She swallowed the snake to gobble the rat.
She swallowed the rat gobble the fish.
She swallowed the fish to gobble the spider.
She swallowed the spider to gobble the flea that fell from her hair and
plopped into her tea.
Eeeeeeeeeeew!
There he goes.
She did It!
She swallowed Jake.*
Child #2:
A snake, a rat, and then a fish.
A spider and a flea!
All Children:
How can that be?
Narrator 1:
I know an old teacher who swallowed a lizard. Got stuck in her gizzard, our
sweet Lizzie Lizard.
She swallowed the Lizard to gobble the snake.
She swallowed the snake to gobble the rat.
She swallowed the rat to gobble the fish.
She swallowed the fish to gobble the spider.
Narrator 2:
Narrator 1:
Narrator 2:
Narrator 1:
Narrator 2:
Child #1:
Child #2:
Child #1:
Child #3:
Child #2:
She swallowed the spider to gobble the flea that fell from her hair and
plopped into her tea.
She’s GOT our Lizzie!
She can’t have our Lizzie!
Well, she’s GOT her!
Going, going…Gone.
Poor Lizzie.
Child #3:
Child #2:
A lizard, a snake, a rat, and a fish.
A spider and a flea.
All Children:
How can that be?
Child #3:
HEY! She’s staring at YOU!
Staring at ME? (gulp) How Can that be?
I know an old teacher who swallowed a child.
Swallow a child?
The old teacher smiled…
I would never do that!
Child #1:
Narrator 1:
Teacher:
Narrator 2:
Teacher: