The Victory in Our Bones
Recently I had occasion to attend a memorial service for the mother
of a friend who I hold dear for more reasons than one. We were young
together in those formative years when you decide how you will look at the
world, what your values will be and how you will negotiate your way through
life. We have been friends for over fifty years. But this service was
special for more reasons than one. Margie’s Mom was one of our many
Mom’s as we tackled the world with no fear, in our brash, enthusiastic way.
There were twelve of us and we coined our group with great imagination in
the incarnation of the: “Tra-vels”, because we liked to travel! And we did,
not internationally, you see, but regularly to plays, cultural events, downtown Chicago, and vacations on our own. We even spent a week by ourselves
in a house in Michigan with no adult supervision, at the ages of sixteen and
seventeen. Our parents had great skepticism but said yes. It was one of
the best vacations I ever had.
We are currently scattered around the country, but we came
together on that Saturday to honor one of our Mom’s. It was, in many
ways, like being transported back to a zone of comfort that I have not
experienced in a long time. I was young again with people who knew what
I was thinking and loved me anyway. I was with people who understood
my sense of humor and laughed at my corny jokes. I was with those who
loved me much and long (50 years) and valued me just because of who I
am. But one incident, in particular, set me to thinking. One of “the
girls” greeted me with delight and affection and asked what I was doing
these days. I prefaced my reply with: “I’ll tell you, but I know that
this might make you laugh or think I’m lying”. I continued and told her
that I had recently completed a degree in theology and am currently a
writer of religion and theology on “the net”. Her reaction took me by
surprise. She became profoundly silent for a moment, looked at me long,
and then said: “You, Kath, you always were the one who could do
anything; nothing ever stopped you, congratulations!” I was so taken by
her reply that for just an instant, my eyes welled up. To think that I
have been held in that esteem for such a long time struck me, literally,
speechless! This girl’s first impressions of me occurred when I was just
16 or so. I was so blessed by her comment that I thought about it for
days. I re-lived the moment over and over in my mind. It was so filled
with love.
Then I thought about the bigger picture and I crystallized some of
the things that affected me so profoundly from her short comment. Very
simply, it was a recall of the “victory in my bones”. As we travel through
life we get a little “frayed around the edges”. We become tired of our
routines, our job, our house, the people around us, and the things that we
have not accomplished. We tend to dwell on all the “stuff” that we haven’t
been successful at and our memories tend to be a source of depression and
maybe even illness. But we all have victories in us, things that went well,
things that we achieved, things we learned, choices we are proud of, good
things that we have done. We all carry with us the “grace that God has
given our soul” (Venerable Conchita).
My long time friend’s comment to me recalled that people view me
as someone who is always forward moving. Funny, I forgot that about
myself! It was such a loving remark that it literally energized my spirit.
All of us have “victories” that live in us. As members of a faith community
we need to be very aware of what those are. We have a responsibility to
our community members to tell others that we admire their victories when
the Spirit prompts us to do so. We have a personal responsibility to recall
our own victories, especially the spiritual ones. The “victory in our bones”
is a source of encouragement, healing and spiritual strengthening that we
cannot receive any other way. You see, no one else can feel the way we
did, in our spirit, when we gained a particular victory. Recall of our past
victories is like “vitamin water” for our spirit, energizing and healing at the
same time.
The “victory in our bones” is much more than a mental exercise. As
I spent time with “the girls” and their long time boyfriends (now husbands).
I actually had the tangible experience of what it feels to be loved
unconditionally and when “Woody” made that comment to me I had the
physical sense of what it is like to be respected unconditionally. The bible
even teaches us this very important lesson for staying in shape spiritually.
When we look at the passages that describe David’s encounter with Goliath
(Daniel 17: 34-36) we see that he recalls the animals that he has
previously killed including a bear and a lion, in other words, his past
victories. This was more than a mental exercise for him. He was recalling
what it was like to be accurate and courageous as he had done before.
This leads him to success. In this year of St. Paul we also see that, as
the great Saint ministers, he also takes advantage of others past victories.
His ministry was to widely diverse communities who were sometimes fighting
like spoiled children, but he never ceases to recall, to each one of them,
how much he loves and respects them for their accomplishments.
Chastisement might follow, but the open of most of his letters recalls some
victory of the community or person that he is writing to. To the Romans he
says: “First I thank my God through Jesus Christ for all of you for the
way in which your faith is spoken of all over the world” (Rm 1:8). To the
Corinthians he tells: “I never stop thanking God for all the graces you have
received through Jesus Christ” (I Corinth 1:4). To the Ephesians he
recalls: “Having once heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and the love
you show toward all the saints (I) have never failed to remember you in my
prayers and to thank God for you” (Eph 1:14-15). For the Philippians he
reminds then that: “I thank my God whenever I think of you…remembering
how you have helped to spread the Good News from the day you first
heard it” (Phil 1:3-6). For the Colossians it is no different: “We have
never failed to remember you in our prayers and to give thanks for you to
God the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ ever since we heard about your
faith in Christ Jesus and the love that you show toward all the saints
because of the hope stored up for you in heaven” (Col 1: 2-5). To the
Thessalonians he recalls their good works: “We …thank God for you all and
constantly remember…how you have shown your faith in action, worked for
love and persevered through hope….”(1 Thess 1:2-4).
We can have no stronger witness to the fact that we have a great
responsibility to help recall and actualize others’ victories, as well as our
own. Paul, you will recall, successfully evangelized most of the known
world. The Church exists today largely due to his astounding efforts. Do
you hesitate when you are prompted by the Spirit to encourage someone
with something they have done or said? Do you nullify your own victories
by saying or thinking things like: “That wasn’t that great.” Or “I really
didn’t do anything”? Do you minimize others when they try to remind you of
a past victory? The “victory in our bones” is a powerful weapon in our bag
of spiritual tools. It can be healing, uplifting and sustaining. Do not
hesitate to use it and encourage it in others. Thanks Woody!
Copyright ©2009, Kathryn M. Cunningham, all rights reserved.