Christmas at Base 327 3
(Show the Moon and Davis logo. Show the opening titles. Pan down to Base 327,
covered in snow. Show inside the base with lots of clones doing “Christmas-y” things.
The Commander comes on the intercom.)
COMMANDER:
Hey guys! Commander here on WB327, it’s time to go to bed, Santa’s gonna be here
soon and you don’t want him to catch you awake, or you might not get any presents!
(huge gasp from everyone.) So jump in bed and cover up your head ‘cause Santa
Claus comes tonight! That’s all.
(Show chaos. Everyone is panicking and trying to get into their room as fast as they
possibly can. Show the Grumpy Clone.)
GRUMPY:
What’s the big deal?
(Show Rico and Red in a hallway.)
RICO:
Hey Red, I’m gonna get up and try to see Santa when he comes.
RED:
Why?
RICO:
I don’t know, because I can.
RED:
I don’t know, Rico. If he catches you, you might not get presents.
RICO:
Well then I’ll just make sure I don’t get caught.
(Bomby and Bomber walk up to Rico.)
BOMBY:
Hey Rico, I couldn’t help but overhear, but did you say you were going to sneak out of
bed and spy on Santa?
RICO:
Yeah, kind of.
BOMBY:
What? Haven’t you heard that Santa turns into a giant monster and eats little clones
that he catches out of bed?
RICO:
Really?
BOMBY:
Yes! I wouldn’t leave my bed for ANYTHING if I were you!
RICO:
Oh-no!!!
BOMBY:
Well good night Rico, and don’t get out of bed!
RICO:
Good night.
BOMBY:
(snickering as he is leaving) Rico is so stupid.
RICO:
What am I gonna do? I really want to see Santa! I’ll just have to MAKE SURE I don’t get
caught.
RED:
You’re still doing it?
RICO:
Of course I am! Good night, Red.
(He leaves.) (Show Rico in the dark bedroom wide awake, waiting for Santa. We hear a
clunk and Santa.)
SANTA:
(in background) Ho ho ho ho…
(Rico gasps quietly and sits up a little. He looks over at Fox, who is sleeping like a rock.
He gets out of bed, grabs his helmet and his stuffed animal and leaves the room.)
(Show Santa putting presents under the tree. Rico peeks out from a wall. He giggles a
little bit.)
FOX:
Rico?
RICO:
(gasps) Fox?
FOX:
WHAT are you doing?
RICO:
SHHHH! I…I just wanted to see Santa!
FOX:
Rico get back to bed right now!
RICO:
But Fox! I—
NEW GUY:
What’s going on?
RICO:
New Guy?
(Show Santa drinking milk and eating a cookie while the others are arguing. He turns.)
SANTA:
Hmmm… (Show the clones arguing. Santa appears.) What’s going on here?
RICO:
(whipping around) (huge gasp) SANTA!!!!!! Oh please don’t eat me I just wanted to
see you! PLEASE DON’T EAT ME!
SANTA:
Eat you? Ho, ho, ho! Why would I eat you? But I’m afraid since I caught you out of bed
I’m gonna have to give you coal. (Takes out a piece of coal)
RICO:
NO!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE SANTA PLEASE LET ME HAVE MY ASSAULT TANK PLEASE!!!!!!!!! I
PROMISE I’LL NEVER EVER DO IT AGAIN EVER EVER!!!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE DON’T GIVE ME
COAL!!!!!!!!!!!!
SANTA:
Ho, ho, ho! I’m just kidding, Rico, your assault tank’s outside.
RICO:
(huge gasp)
SANTA:
Ah, ah, ah! You must wait until morning.
RICO:
Awww…
FOX:
(quietly) Um…Santa…um…er…do…I still get my DX-47 rocket launcher?
SANTA:
Ho, ho, ho! Of course you do! You’re all forgiven! Now go back to bed before I change
my mind, ho, ho, ho!
FOX, RICO, NEW GUY:
Yes Santa. (they leave)
(Show the Janitor about to shoot himself with a pistol. He is startled by Santa.)
SANTA:
Janitor! What are you doing out of bed!
JANITOR:
I’m working, sir.
SANTA:
At 2 am? You should be ashamed!
JANITOR:
It’s the night shift! I’m always up at 2 am!
SANTA:
No presents for you, only coal. (leaves)
JANITOR:
Even Santa Claus?
(Fade in to show the Christmas tree with tons of presents around it. Title says “the
Next Morning”. Show clones sleeping. One wakes up and tells everyone it’s Christmas.
The other clones wake up and cheer. This whole scene is just like the beginning of
New Year’s at Base 327. The clone yawns and runs out the door, and all the clones run
towards their Christmas presents. Show Bomby and Bomber.)
BOMBY:
Oh I can’t wait to see what I got! (opens box) What? Coal? But—but I haven’t pranked
anyone this whole month!
BOMBER:
What about that gun you put in the Janitor’s trash can last night?
BOMBY:
Oh…yeah…
(Show ARF opening his present.)
ARF:
Awesome! Another gun! (points his guns up) Anyone who calls me “Arfy”, prepare to
die!
(Show Fox getting his _________.)
FOX:
YES!!! (holds it up) Now I can shoot all these clones and escape from this base forev—
(sees Commander standing next to him) I mean uh…now I can put this in my closet
and never use it and only look at it every two months!
COMMANDER:
(walking away) That’s what I thought you said.
JANITOR:
(gets a piece of coal) Another piece of coal to add to my sculpture!
(He walks over and places it on his Eiffel Tower made of coal.) (Show Rico and Red
going outside.)
RICO:
My assault tank!
RED:
Um, Rico, you realize that’s a droid tank, right? (show an AAT)
RICO:
I don’t care. I’m gonna go shoot a missile. (runs off)
RED:
Okay I’ll be insi—wait a—no—NO RICO!!!!!
(Credits)
THE END