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The True Story Of The 3 Little Pigs!
By Jon Scieszka
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1. Everybody knows the story of the Three Little Pigs.
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2. Or at least they think they do.
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3. But I’ll let you in on a little secret.
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0104 4. Nobody knows the real story, because nobody has
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ever heard my side of the story.
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5. I’m the wolf.
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6. Alexander T. Wolf
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7. You can call me Al.
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8. I don’t know how this whole Big Bad Wolf thing
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got started, but it’s all wrong.
0301 9. Maybe it’s because of our diet.
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10. Hey, it’s not my fault wolves eat cute little animals
like bunnies and sheep and pigs.
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11. That’s just the way we are.
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12. If cheeseburgers were cute, folks would probably
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think you were Big and Bad, too.
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13. But like I was saying, the whole Big Bad Wolf thing is
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all wrong.
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14. The real story is about a sneeze and a cup of sugar.
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0501 15. This is the real story.
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0601 16. Way back in Once Upon a Time time, I was making a
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birthday cake for my dear old granny.
0602 17. I had a terrible sneezing cold.
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0603 18. I ran out of sugar.
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0801 19. So I walked down the street to ask my neighbor for a cup
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of sugar.
0802 20. Now this neighbor was a pig.
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0803 21. And he wasn’t too bright, either.
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0804 22. He had built his whole house out of straw.
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0805 23. Can you believe it?
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0806 24. I mean who in his right mind would build a house of straw?
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25. So of course the minute I knocked on the door, it fell
right in.
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26. I didn’t want to just walk into someone else’s house.
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27. So I called, “Little Pig, Little Pig, are you in?”
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28. No answer.
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29. I was just about to go home without the cup of sugar
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for my dear old granny’s birthday cake.
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30. That’s when my nose started to itch.
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31. I felt a sneeze coming on.
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32. Well I huffed.
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33. And I snuffed.
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34. And I sneezed a great sneeze.
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35. And you know what?
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36. That whole darn straw house fell down.
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37. And right in the middle of the pile of straw was
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the First Little Pig—dead as a doornail.
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38. He had been home the whole time.
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39. It seemed like a shame to leave a perfectly good
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ham dinner lying there in the straw.
1502 40. So I ate it up.
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1503 41. Think of it as a big cheeseburger just lying there.
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1601 42. I was feeling a little better.
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1602 43. But I still didn’t have my cup of sugar.
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1603 44. So I went to the next neighbor’s house.
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1604 45. This neighbor was the First Little Pig’s brother.
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1605 46. He was a little smarter, but not much.
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1606 47. He had built his house of sticks.
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1701 48. I rang the bell on the stick house.
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1702 49. Nobody answered.
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1703 50. I called, “Mr. Pig, Mr. Pig, are you in?”
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1704 51. He yelled back, “Go away wolf.
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1705 52. You can’t come in.
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1706 53. I’m shaving the hairs on my chinny chin chin.”
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1801 54. I had just grabbed the doorknob when I felt another
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sneeze coming on.
1802 55. I huffed.
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1803 56. And I snuffed.
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1804 57. And tried to cover my mouth, but I sneezed a
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great sneeze.
1901 58. And you’re not going to believe it, but this guy’s house
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fell down just like his brother’s.
1902 59. When the dust cleared, there was the second Little
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Pig—dead as a doornail.
1903 60. Wolf’s honor.
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2001 61. Now you know food will spoil if you just leave it out
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in the open.
2002 62. So I did the only think there was to do.
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2003 63. I had dinner again.
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2004 64. Think of it as a second helping.
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2005 65. I was getting awfully full.
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2006 66. But my cold was feeling a little better.
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2007 67. And I still didn’t have that cup of sugar for my dear old
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granny’s birthday cake.
2008 68. So I went to the next house.
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2009 69. This guy was the First and Second Little Pig’s brother.
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2010 70. He must have been the brains of the family.
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2011 71. He had built his house of bricks.
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2101 72. I knocked on the brick house.
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2102 73. No answer.
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2103 74. I called, “Mr. Pig, Mr. Pig, are you in there?”
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2104 75. And do you know what that rude little porker answered?
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2105 76. “Get out of here, Wolf.
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2106 77. Don’t bother me again.”
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2201 78. Talk about impolite!
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2202 79. He probably had a whole sackful of sugar.
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2203 80. And he wouldn’t give me even one little cup for my
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dear sweet old granny’s birthday cake.
2204 81. What a pig!
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2205 82. I was just about to go home and maybe make a nice
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birthday card instead of a cake, when I felt my cold coming on.
2206 83. I huffed.
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2207 84. And I snuffed.
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2208 85. And I sneezed once again.
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86. Then the Third Little Pig yelled, “And your old
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granny can sit on a pin!”
2401 87. Now I’m usually a pretty calm fellow.
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2402 88. But when someone talks about my granny like
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that , I go a little crazy.
2403 89. When the cops drove up, of course I was trying
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to break down this Pigs door.
2404 90. And the whole time I was huffing and puffing and
sneezing and making a real scene.
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2601 91. The rest, as they say, is history.
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2701 92. The news reporters found out about the two pigs I had
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for dinner.
2702 93. They figured a sick guy going to borrow a cup of sugar
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didn’t sound very exciting.
2703 94. So they jazzed up the story with all of that “Huff
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and puff and blow your house down.”
2704 95. And they made me the Big Bad Wolf.
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2705 96. That’s it.
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2706 97. The real story.
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2707 98. I was framed.
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2801 99. But maybe you could loan me a cup of sugar.
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