11 - Developing Loving-Kindness - Talk
What is metta?… Metta is a pali word which is most frequently translated as Loving
Kindness, or Loving Friendliness. We would all probably agree that these are very nice
sounding words. These words are used to describe an especially pure and wholesome
emotion, or state of mind, which is intentionally cultivated by wise meditators.
Unfortunately however, these simple words do not come anywhere near describing the
power of metta, or the vital role that cultivating this quality plays in the process of
purifying the mind.
At first glance, this quality that we call loving kindness could seem somewhat sacharin or
wishy washy. But fortunately for us, the Buddha in his great wisdom emphasized this
quality in his teachings, so that his followers would not make the mistake of overlooking
it’s cultivation. Metta starts as a pure and kind intention, then it becomes a wholesome
and uplifting emotion. Through continued cultivation, this pure emotion of lovingkindness eventually becomes a powerful type of wholesome concentration. Developing
this type of concentration can play an enormously helpful role in the ongoing process of
mental development. Because it encourages that which is good and skilful, and turns
away from that which is not. But in order to truly understand this heart based quality,
we must look quite deeply, and we must look from a place deep within our own hearts.
And we might also look to the example of those in the world who have actually cultivated
this quality.
In Thailand there are certain monks who are very famous for their development of the
quality of Loving Kindness in particular. Some of these monks spend much of each day
receiving guests and accepting offerings from the faithful. I would suggest here that this
is not for their own sakes, but rather for the purpose of encouraging others. The large
numbers of people who make the effort to pay their respects to these monks is
astonishing, and an onlooker can easily observe that for the most part, all of the people
who come within close proximity to these meditation masters, walk away smiling
radiantly. Feeling blessed simply to have had the opportunity to pay respects, and to
have received the goodwill radiating from the minds of such beings. Loving Kindness
touches people very very deeply.
Metta is both beautiful and profound. …
It is soft… and yet extremely powerful...
It is at once, gentle… and utterly transformative…
And most significantly of all… in it’s pure form… it is non-personal and completely
impartial.
One prominent example of someone who exhibit’s a lot of this quality of metta in this
day and age, is His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama. You will notice that wherever His
Holiness goes in the world, many thousands of people go to listen to, or simply to see
him. It should be noted that a large percentage of these people are not actually Buddhist
practitioners. I personally suspect that many of these people are intuitively drawn in a
way that they cannot quite describe or understand. Somehow it just feels important and
uplifting, to witness and be near to such a kind, warm, forgiving and optimistic person.
People feel that the Dalai Lama sees what is good in them, he sees their potential, and he
wishes to encourage it - and this is a tremendous blessing. And so the Dalai Lama is a
very good example of a person who demonstrates a lot of this quality. Most of the
people who meet this simple monk, from prime ministers and royalty, to children and
little old ladies in the street, feel that he truly wishes them well. Loving-kindness as a
spiritual quality sees what is good… It encourages and it blesses. And it can be
developed boundlessly… for one and for all. And of course there are many other less
famous monks and nuns and gifted lay-practitioners as well, still living in the world
today, who have developed loving-kindness to an extraordinary degree, and who share
the blessings of this quality with all who they meet.
In an effort to make this subject a little more relevant…
personal question now…. Think for a moment…
I would like to ask you a
Who is it who has touched you most deeply in this lifetime?… (long pause)
Or … Who do you consistently remember with joy and deep gratitude?….. (pause)
I expect that the people who have touched you most deeply in your life, are people who
demonstrated or shared this particular quality with you in some way or other. The
people who radiate and act from the heart of loving kindness, are usually the ones who
we remember with gratitude, with a smile and warmth in our hearts. Or perhaps the
thought of them brings tears of gratitude to our eyes. The very thought of them
brightens the mind. Considering these things, hopefully now you have a little more of a
sense for this quality called metta.
Moving now from the personally profound to the very profound. What did the Buddha,
our refuge as Buddhist practitioners, have to say about metta?
At one time when some monks were having difficulties living comfortably in forests, due
to interferences from resident ghosts and malicious spirits. The Buddha spoke the
discourse on Loving-Kindness, and he told the monks that they should recite this sutta
frequently in their various forest abodes. When they did so, it was discovered that all
previous unpleasant interferences were quickly dispelled. It is understood that
contemplating the benefits of metta, and setting the intention to cultivate this quality, has
a highly protective influence in peoples lives, and endears one both to seen and unseen
beings. Many monks and nuns and devout laypeople throughout the Theravadan world
still recite this sutta frequently to this day.
The Buddha also instructed his disciples that it was their duty to radiate loving-kindness
in all directions, every single day, especially towards the village upon which they were
dependent for alms food. And in one sutta the Buddha states quite pointedly, that he
knows of no other quality more conducive to heavenly re-birth, than the cultivation of
loving kindness meditation. Personally, I am confident that when the Buddha speaks in
such a manner, his meaning is literal, and not just an artful metaphor.
In other suttas the Buddha explains that sadly, most beings in samsara have been reborn
in realms lower than the human realm. And yet the Brahma realms, some of the highest
and purest of the realms in the conditioned universe, are inhabited by beings who have
cultivated the quality of loving-kindness in particular. For those who are open to this
aspect of the Buddha’s teaching, these statements certainly do suggest that we are talking
about extremely powerful causes and conditions here.
So okay, perhaps metta is very powerful… but we are serious practicing Buddhists…
and we don’t actually want to be re-born in some remote and lofty region of heaven, only
to have to be re-born again and again… we want to be liberated! Fair enough, but
even so, I would like to suggest that we all do need to cultivate this quality of lovingkindness to some significant degree in our practice. As a tool that will aid us on our path
towards liberation. Perhaps not to the level of the purest and highest angels, but
certainly to the level of a truly benevolent human being. If we are honest, most of us
will admit that we still have some work to do here.
In one sutta in the Anguttara Nikaya, (volume 1 no 182) …in a converstion with a
Brahmin, the Buddha explains that he himself radiates loving kindness to the people in
the village upon which he is dependent for alms. Having done this he radiates it… “in a
second direction, a third direction, a fourth direction, above and below, around and
everywhere.” He continues by telling the Brahmin…“The whole world I suffuse with a
heart grown great with Loving Kindness, free of enmity and untroubled.”
Considering that this is the Buddha talking here, completely liberated and foremost
among fully enlightened beings. Given that he too inclined his mind towards loving
kindness, radiating it to all beings in all directions, even in his final birth after
enlightenment, we can certainly feel confident of both the wholesome and beneficial
nature of this quality of mind.
Given all of this, many people may still be wondering - As Buddhist practitioners in this
day and age, do we actually need to cultivate metta? Well, if you are one of the rare
beings who was simply born with a lot of this quality already operating in your mind,
then perhaps you don’t need to spend so much time on this. But if you are like me - that
is to say, your mind is still affected by greed and attachment and occasional sticky forms
of anger and aversion, then the cultivation of this quality is essential.
One very renowned teacher who I once stayed and practiced with in Thailand teaches his
monks that they should definitely practice metta at times, because it cleans out, or washes
away the defilements. It has a pacifying and sublimating influence upon the mind. And
actually, even for people who naturally possess a lot of this quality, learning to refine and
cultivate it further, within the focus and discipline of formal meditation, is extremely
beneficial.
Ajahn Pasanno - co abbot of Abhayagiri monastery in Redwood Valley California - said
the following in a talk that he gave to laypeople about metta and the other
Brahmaviharas.
“The whole point of the Buddhas teaching is to cultivate mental qualities in order to gain
happiness of mind. And the brahmaviharas - a prime source for creating happiness - can
thus lay the foundation for the entire practice.”
Looked at whole-istically, true happiness according to the Buddhist path, is based upon
the well-being which comes from being generous and kind, and the freedom of remorse
which comes from maintaining virtuous conduct, as well as from the wholesome mental
qualities which are developed through meditation. Being generous is an expression of
loving-kindness, towards oneself and towards others. And so is refraining from harmful
and unskillful activities. But in our meditation, we cultivate metta even further, by
generating it in the mind as a pure emotion, then developing, refining and expanding
upon it in a concentrated way.
Later in the same talk, after describing the progression of qualities which lead to
Samadhi, Ajahn Pasanno paraphrases the process with the following pertinent statement.
“We see that happiness brings about Samadhi, whereas usually we approach it the other
way around. We often think, “If only I could get my meditation together. Then I would
be happy.” whereas it should be. “How do I gain true happiness so that my heart could be
at ease.”
Cultivating loving-kindness in the mind, as well as speaking and acting from the heart of
loving-kindness, is a major ingredient for experiencing well-being.
I would like to talk a little more specifically now, about why metta is useful as a
component in our meditation practice. It seems to be the case that most modern
meditators minds, will not simply settle down easily and stay with the breath in every
meditation session. Most modern people, with busy and complicated lives, will find that
they need a variety of tools and techniques in order to be able to bring their minds into
balanced and peaceful states. Learning to use different methods and techniques at
different times, depending upon what seems appropriate or effective.
When we become skilled at picking up a wholesome meditation object such as metta, we
can then apply this in various ways within our practice. For example, if we notice that
the mind is obsessing about something unskillful, we can decide to consciously turn the
mind towards loving kindness practice. We can pick up this alternative wholesome
‘mental object’, as a way of prying the minds sticky hands off of the more dangerous
mental object. Developing these types of skills can save us a lot of time, and relieve us
of a lot of unnecessary suffering. Of course becoming skilled at generating lovingkindness at will is dependent upon a lot of repeated practice. But it is well worth it.
Keep in mind too, that metta meditation is actually very pleasant. The Buddha called
metta one of the sublime or divine abidings, because of it’s inherently pleasant
characteristics.
I am confident that many people may already recognise the potential of this quality. Yet I
am also aware that many people may lack the confidence, or the understanding of how to
go about developing this quality in a disciplined way through repeated meditation
practice. One of my primary aims in producing this CD of Guided Meditations, was to
give meditators clear instructions, encouragement, and clear examples of methods and
techniques which can be developed, so that they might feel more confident about
cultivating metta practice further.
In the Loving Kindness section of this CD, I have offered several examples of techniques,
which are clearly labeled as being suitable either for lay Buddhists, or for everyone. So
hopefully you will be able to find among these, a method, or methods which seem to
work for you. Within each of the meditations, there are progressive stages which are
clearly explained and described, at a comfortable and unhurried pace. Each metta
meditation is presented in a simple and encouraging way. So you can feel confident that
through repeated practice, you can definitely become more skilled in generating this
quality in your own mind. You can also feel confident that the more you cultivate this
quality in formal meditation sessions, the more this quality will naturally overflow into
your daily life. It is the experience of many, that those who cultivate metta definitely
become kinder and happier people.
In the guided meditations that I have presented, we will begin by learning how to hold the
kind and pure thoughts and feelings of loving-kindness directed towards ourselves. We
do this by simply generating a warm and kind feeling in the area of our own heart, and by
repeating simple phrases in conjunction with the in and out breathing, which remind us of
our intention. Some people may have some resistance to this at first, but it is in fact an
essential step in cultivating this quality of metta. Because it is from our own heart that
we must learn to generate this quality outwards. It is necessary to fill our own heart with
metta first… so that it can then overflow outwards in all other directions.
No one should think that having loving-kindness for oneself is selfish. I would suggest
that when we truly know how to take care of ourselves, we will in fact be more capable
of genuinely caring for others. But sadly, and somewhat strangely, many people have
learned to withhold this quality from themselves. And have a habit of judging and
criticizing themselves consistently and over- harshly instead. This can be very
exhausting and painful. But it is important to be optimistic and to understand that these
kind of mental habits can definitely be brought back into balance. For those people
who may have a significant challenge in this area, I have included a meditation
specifically for assisting in overcoming this habit. It is titled - ‘Loving Kindness
meditation - for those with a deep habit of self aversion’
There is also a Loving Kindness meditation which focuses upon forgiving oneself for the
mistakes which one may have made in the past. Forgiving ourselves for the past can
also be an important step in the process of learning to have a healthy amount of lovingkindness for ourselves. Before we can truly hold loving-kindness in the heart, we might
need to do some work clearing out old judgements and fixed positions about ourselves.
And then learn to start afresh with a kind and positive attitude.
When we develop loving-kindness for ourselves, it is not that we overlook our faults, but
rather that we learn to see them in a kinder and wiser perspective. We do not reject our
innate goodness, or refuse to see our potential. We become much more willing to put
past old judgements and perceptions behind us, and to see the potential of each new day,
and of each new moment. We learn to work patiently in order to overcome our faults,
instead of rejecting ourselves and giving up before even trying.
It really isn’t so difficult to establish this quality towards oneself. If you can begin to
recognise that you are also one being among the many suffering beings in the world. That
you have your own type of difficulties and struggles. And your own particular types of
suffering, as well as hopes and aspirations for lasting happiness. Once you truly and
deeply recognise the validity of your own wish for happiness, with a little training and
encouragement, your own heart can learn to respond by sending forth vast stores of
blessings and goodwill, becoming a deep source of nourishment for your spiritual
journey.
Once we are skilled in generating this quality of metta and pervading our own body and
mind with it, we then move on to generating this quality towards others. The guided
meditation will guide you in these steps. At first we generate this quality towards those
who we could easily feel loving-kindness towards. Our friends and close acquaintances,
or dear family members. It is important here not to bring to mind anybody for whom we
might feel a lot of sexual attraction. It’s not that we shouldn’t have loving-kindness
towards these people as well, it’s just that if we think of these people in our meditation,
our meditation will quite likely take a turn into the realm of sensuality… and this is not
the pure type of love which we are aiming for, in formal loving-kindness meditation. So
try to stick with those people for whom you feel a paternal or maternal kind of loving
kindness towards.
After we become skilled at this, we then move on to include larger numbers of more
neutral people. We simply try to bring to mind those people for whom we might not feel
anything in particular. The anonymous people who we pass on the street or in elevators
or along hallways etc. What we are doing here, is learning how to make our ordinary
quality of loving-kindness less constrained and conditioned. We are literally learning
how to flex the heart-minds muscles, so that this pure emotion can become bigger and
stronger, so that it can grow to include more and more people. These are the initial
Loving Kindness practices.
Once we have developed some skill in this meditation, we can then move on to the more
advanced stages. Several of the guided meditations for lay Buddhists will give you
choices. You will be given the choice to end the meditation after the initial stages, or to
continue onwards to subsequent stages. The initial practice of generating lovingkindness for oneself… goes for 30 minutes… continuing on to include a few people for
whom it is easy and natural to feel loving-kindness towards… and for a larger number
of more neutral people… takes another 15 minutes. The more advanced stage is then
covered in the subsequent 15 minutes.
The advanced stage is very similar to the previous ones, except that we try to include
even larger numbers of neutral people… and then we also move on to generating
loving-kindness towards the category of people for whom we might usually find it
difficult to feel loving-kindness towards. This could include people who have harmed us
in the past… or the people who for some reason or other may not wish us well in our
lives… or those who we do not know, yet who we suspect or have heard have caused
or are causing serious harm to others. We conclude all of the meditations by returning to
the perception of ourselves, and wishing ourselves well.
It is important to understand that there is no particular hurry to move onto the more
advanced practices. It is actually recommended that you take some time establishing the
initial stages deeply, before moving onto the more challenging stages. The growth of the
pure emotion of loving-kindness is necessarily gradual. It takes time to generate new
habits, and even longer to make these habits very deep. So it is fine to turn the guided
meditation off at the half hour point. And to repeat the initial stages practice again and
again, over a long period, before deciding to include the final 15 minutes, which
incorporates the more difficult stages. Go at your own pace, and at a natural pace.
The last step, cultivating goodwill for harmful or difficult people can be a difficult step to
take in the process of developing loving-kindness. But it is important to understand that
the more our mind becomes imbued with this quality, the more bright and happy we will
feel. It is also important to understand that when we generate this quality of lovingkindness to people who have harmed us… or who have harmed others… we are not
actually condoning the unskillful acts which these people may have been involved in
committing. We are simply wishing that these people could be well and happy.
It might be helpful to give some thought here to what we might mean by these words
…‘Well’ … and… ‘Happy’…? If these so called ‘difficult’ people were well and
happy, it would most probably mean that they would abandon their unskillful
behaviour… Because cruel or mean people are not actually well and happy... So when
we make this simple wish, we are actually also wishing that these people might learn how
to become good and kind people. Understanding that this is what would make it possible
for them to become truly happy and well.
But during the meditation, we are not trying to think about exactly what these various
types of ‘difficult’ people should abandon. To do so might risk giving rise to unskillful
emotions and attitudes such as self-righteousness. Which is not an aspect of lovingkindness. There are no pulpits or soap boxes in metta meditation. We don’t need to be
concerned with any particular time frame either. When these people eventually get
around to abandoning their unskillful habits is not actually our concern. During our
metta meditation, we are simply and sincerely learning to wish all beings well. And we
are practicing establishing this deep goodwill and pure intention in our own hearts first.
Of course it is also equally important to understand that when we increase our lovingkindness to include more neutral people, and more difficult people, we are not trying to
suspend our intelligence or wise discrimination. In our everyday lives, we still have to
be cautious and careful with regards to who we allow ourselves to associate with or
become close to. But even if we do not like or trust somebody, we can still ultimately
wish them well, and this is actually and act of kindness to ourselves.
Once people learn to generate loving-kindness towards all beings, they can become
much, much happier. For in doing so, we relieve ourselves of the heavy burden of
carrying around anger and grudges. Of course it is true that on one level some people
seem to enjoy being spiteful or holding a grudge. But the narrow and mean happiness
that comes from spite, pales in comparison to the deep and vast happiness which can arise
from a heart grown large with loving-kindness.
There are potentially many benefits which can come from the cultivation of this practice.
I will give a simple example now from my own practice. Many years ago one of my
teachers in Thailand, Venerable Ajahn Anan, a senior disciple of Ajahn Chah,
encouraged me to begin each meditation sitting with a 5 minute session of Loving
Kindness practice. I soon noticed that whenever I did this, that there would be less
physical pain in my body, and that the usual hindrances to peacefulness would be less
coarse. Subsequently, feeling much gratitude to Ajahn Anan, I made this a consistent
part of my daily practice.
I would like us to consider now, the value of cultivating loving-kindness within the more
mundane, yet perhaps equally important realm of human psychology. Generating this
quality of loving kindness can definitely assist meditators in healing the various types of
psychological wounds that can affect human beings. For although metta is ultimately an
impersonal quality, it tends to have a powerful healing effect upon the people who
cultivate it. Enabling them to feel more whole and truly human. Many psychological
wounds arise from experiences which leave people feeling abused, neglected or unloved.
But once a person becomes skilled at generating the heart of loving-kindness, and holding
it within the body and mind for extended periods of time, such feelings are able to arise,
heal, and then simply fall away. This is one of the very pleasant and useful benefits that
can arise from this practice. Pleasant because it can alleviate or reduce a certain type of
suffering, and useful because good mental health is the best foundation for ongoing
spiritual practice.
Having spoken this initial introduction about the special value of cultivating the beautiful
quality of loving kindness. I ask your indulgence now, in allowing me to become a little
more emphatic about the possible need for us to cultivate it. You might well ask, why
does Ajahn Achalo need to become more emphatic now? … and I might answer…
because Ajahn Achalo knows that although a lot of Buddhist meditators have come to
accept the fact that metta is a beautiful and potentially beneficial quality, very few
practitioners follow through by making a sincere commitment to cultivating it in a
consistent, disciplined and focused way. Many meditators tend to look at metta practice
as something nice and as something optional. Perhaps not recognizing that it might well
be something necessary and vital.
Now a lot of what I will be saying in the remainder of this talk is based upon my own
observations, opinions and perspectives. I don’t expect anyone to sympathise entirely.
But I offer these further considerations for your contemplation now, because I do believe
that they are quite valid. Try to take away whatever seems helpful and leave aside what
is not.
It is my opinion that cultivating the heart of Loving Kindness is extremely important in
our practice. In the beginning, in the middle and in the end. Metta is important in
many ways, and it has important functions to play within several different areas of our
lives. It is important spiritually, psychologically and sociologically. I would further
suggest that cultivating this quality is particularly important for everyone who has been
born into the world at this time, and living in this current era. An era which the Buddha
himself referred to as one of the darker periods of the aeon...
Most modern people living in the globalised media dominated world, are consistently
exposed to powerful negative conditioning influences, which are so pervasive and
prevalent, that it is difficult to even recognise or question them… but as meditators…
or simply as human beings who wish to be well… perhaps we should learn to recognise
and question all types of powerful conditioning influences, especially if they are
negative…
I think that it is the case that the vast majority of us have grown up being deeply
influenced by a very harsh and cynical mass media, a media driven by far less than pure
motivations…. (pause) … most of us have been exposed to tens of thousands, or perhaps
hundreds of thousands of hours of news media and entertainment which did not reflect
very much of what could be considered truly positive…(pause)..
But did however reflect a great deal of gratuitous violence…(pause)
I think that it is fair enough to say that we have also been conditioned to some degree, to
be greedy and competitive, in the currently very powerful culture of consumerism…
(pause)
And western societies in recent decades, and many Asian societies as well, perhaps partly
due to a backlash against the way morality has previously been taught unskillfully - have
become increasingly hedonistic, encouraging a rebellious attitude towards any suggestion
of moderation or morality…(pause)
It is my observation, and the observation of many of my monk and nun and sincere layBuddhist friends too, that these types of values and attitudes are being reflected more and
more aggressively in our societies and medias, and are having a very serious effect upon
the world and upon peoples minds. The quiet and wise voice which says that virtue,
contentment and moderation, is the true and necessary foundation for well-being and
happiness. Is being drowned out by the noisy sales pitches which encourage the exact
opposite.
And sadly, many people forget that they are not actually separate from the world or from
their acts. Even if we are not conscious of the way we are conditioned or encouraged to
behave. Even if we are just following along… our habitual behavior does effect us very
deeply. In persueing greed rather than contentment, and sensuality rather than virtue,
and by learning to respond with cynicism and indifference, or even worse, with sadistic
pleasure, towards scenes of violence, rather than with a healthy human sympathy, we
become more worldly. Our own inner worth and self respect becomes damaged in the
process.
So I know that I have stepped into dangerous territory now. This talk is beginning to
sound a little like a sermon, and nobody likes to be preached at. So why have I
digressed in this direction… Why does ajahn Achalo think that acknowledging these
things is important and relevant to us as contemporary Buddhist meditators?
Because all of these factors have I believe, contributed to conditioning most of us
towards mental attitudes which can be quite apathetic, mercenary and cynical at times.
Attitudes which are the exact opposite of the attitude of loving-kindness. I am
suggesting that the fact that we have been conditioned not to be particularly loving and
kind, may well have something to do with why many of us don’t actually feel like
cultivating metta much of the time. That even though we understand the value of the
practice, for some reason there is resistance, perhaps even aversion to the idea of
personally cultivating it.
And so hopefully, in seeing more clearly that we may have been conditioned away from
an attitude of metta, an attitude which is profoundly important for spiritual practice. We
can then recognise one of the powerful causes of our apathy, and begin to shake it off.
Finding the resolve to be more determined. Taking our cue from the Buddha and his
enlightened disciples, rather than from a morally bankrupt popular culture.
Of course many Buddhist practitioners will have already been investigating and
addressing these kinds of issues with various practices and skillful means. But I would
simply like to add my voice and say that I believe that the cultivation of Loving kindness
is a very wonderful and powerful way of responding to much of the unskillful influences
which we have been exposed to in our lives. Practicing metta is one way that we can
choose to re-condition ourselves for concentrated periods of time, to that which is
extremely positive. By generating metta in our own minds repeatedly, again and again
and again, we can begin to effectively remove some of the harmful imprints which may
have been accumulating in our minds, from negative outside influences.
Practicing consistently establishing the attitude of loving-kindness, is like learning to use
a tuning fork. It brings our life and the world into a clearer focus. And it helps us to
see what is in resonance with our own sincere aspirations to be good and happy people.
And what is dissonant and harmful. Both in the interior environment of our own minds,
and in the external environment of our world.
While thinking in terms of how to encourage and protect a growth in your development
of loving-kindness. As well as learning to cultivate more metta in your own life and
meditation practice, it may also be valueable to seek out opportunities to spend time
within communities, or in societies, where qualities like virtue, generosity and restraint
are recognized and revered. This is another way of bringing things more into balance,
and another way of responding to powerful negative influences by embracing more
positive ones. Doing this can help us to see our practice and life in a context which is
more deeply spiritual. This might mean spending time in meditation centres, monasteries,
or taking trips to foreign countries where a deepening of spiritual practice is possible.
Another possible or likely side effect to having digested a lot of modern news media, is
that it can leave us feeling jaded or indifferent to suffering. Or perhaps the gruesome
details and statistics have been so consistently overwhelming, that we have learned to
anaesthetise ourselves with responses of denial, diversion or distraction. Genocides,
massacres, wars, famines, serial killings, rapes, kidnappings and riots have been paraded
before our eyes one after another after another, year after year after year. So often in
fact that they may have begun to seem somewhat ordinary.
This is the way modern media has presented the heart rending disasters of a vast globe
of humanity to us … In dramatic 3o second bytes… I am not saying here that the media
should not report the news, but on a personal level, we should also be aware of how all of
this reporting is affecting or has affected us. Although we have all no doubt been very
moved and concerned on occasion by the various things we have seen. There were
probably many, many occasions where we simply dis-engaged.
The next point that I wish to make is subtle, yet important. The habits that we generate
in relationship to external phenomena, often wind up playing themselves out internally.
If we have learned to be dismissive of, indifferent to, or cynical towards suffering, rather
than responding to it with kindness externally. We are probably doing this to a
significant degree towards the suffering in our own lives and minds. That is to say,
compounding our already existent suffering, by adding an unsympathetic element of
meanness, or by simply refusing to be moved by it. The Buddhist path however, is
entirely about recognizing suffering, and responding to it skillfully, by cultivating the
factors of the path leading away from suffering.
Loving-kindness practice helps us to resuscitate our natural human empathy, sensitivity
and concern. Of course in becoming more sensitized, we might need to learn to avoid
excessive contact with overly gratuitous sources of media. And we will also have to
work at keeping our metta practiced balanced with wisdom and equanimity. Learning to
keep an island of calm in the centre of our own experience, through training in
mindfulness and concentration.
News media aside, please consider for a moment, what is currently sold to you as
entertainment. Most people accept the fact that we have been conditioned to some
degree, to find the most terrible and gratuitous scenes of violence entertaining? Most
Hollywood movies have the good guys and girls killing the bad guys as simply par for the
course. And usually these stars are portrayed as actually enjoying the violence. And it
is not uncommon for a few scenes of sexual violence to be thrown in too. And then
there are the very popular computer games, where you get to be one of those macho gunwielding stars yourself, blowing away the baddies. Most modern meditators have been
exposed to these kinds of ‘entertainments’ for tens of thousands of hours.
And so once again, I am simply making the point here, that considering the sheer amount
of violent and negative mental impressions that many of us have unwittingly absorbed, it
might be very judicious and wise, to make a serious commitment to developing lovingkindness meditation. Learning to bathe the mind in the purifying and uplifting quality of
metta. And subsequently healing and evolving the inner landscape of the heart and
psyche, into a more genuinely balanced human state.
Okay so perhaps that is enough social commentary? I could go on with my sociological
digression, but I will not. I think that I probably made my point. Loving-Kindness
meditation can be helpful to modern people in all sorts of ways. Psychological,
sociological and spiritual.
So let us return now, to considering the quality of loving-kindness in terms of it being a
meditation object. When talking about metta in the sense of it being a type of meditation
cultivated by Buddhists, essentially what we are talking about here, is a type of
concentration, or Samadhi. Metta starts as kind intentions, kind thoughts and
wholesome loving feelings, then as it becomes more refined and powerful, this quality
has the power to gather the mind into itself, in an upright and wholesome way. All
meditators can develop deeper concentration through practicing repeatedly with
meditation objects such as metta.
As Buddhist practitioners it is essential to understand that it is the integrity and
uprightness of Samadhi, that can give us the centre of spacious clarity from which to see
things less in terms of the ‘self.’ A clear and calm mind is the best foundation for
developing wisdom or engaging in deep contemplation. Learning how to collect the
mind in wholesome states of concentration is one of the primary goals of our meditation
practice. At the same time, when the mind becomes clarified and fortified by a
profoundly concentrated wholesome emotion, we will tend to make better choices in our
lives. Choices which bring benefit to ourselves and others. In the initial stages of our
practice, our metta might not be so concentrated, but such is the power and virtue of this
sublime emotion, that even a little bit of metta, can make a big difference in our lives.
If you could become skilled at generating a mental attitude of true loving-kindness
towards yourself, you could then take this with you wherever you have to go in the world.
Once you have cultivated metta, when you are lonely or confused, you can be kind to
yourself. If someone is unkind to you, you can forgive them quickly and easily, and
also remain kind to yourself. When the external world seems harsh, and frighteningly
impersonal, you can be a friendly refuge for yourself. In establishing a kind, sane and
healthy centre in the middle of your life, the whole world suddenly seems much less
crazy and threatening. Cultivating the heart imbued with loving kindness can be of
enormous assistance in maintaining a healthy sense of well being.
In ending this talk, I would like to talk a little, in more specific detail, with regards to the
series of guided meditations offered in the metta section of this CD. So that you will
have a better idea of what has been presented here for your exploration.
*Some meditators find that they get best results with very simple and repetitive
techniques. With this in mind I have presented a metta practice which utilises frequent
repetition of specific phrases designed to stimulate a warm feeling of metta in the mind.
We begin by making these wishes for ourselves, and then using the same phrases, we
then bring other people and different classes of beings to mind. This metta meditation is
qualified in the title as “Generating the ‘Heart’ of Loving-kindness.”
*Some peoples minds are quite visual. With this in mind I have also presented several
different visualisation based metta practices. One involves visualizing a lotus in the
heart, imagining it blossoming, and then radiating loving kindness outwards in the form
of golden light to various classes of beings. In this meditation, we are still aiming at
generating a warm feeling of loving-kindness at the heart, but we are using a visual tool
to stimulate the process. This meditation is qualified in the title as being a
“Visualisation with lotus.”
*in another metta visualisation meditation, as a way of incorporating some
Buddhanussati, that is, the practice or recollecting the example and qualities of the
Buddha. I am leading the meditator in a visualisation where one sees, pays respects and
makes offerings to the newly enlightened Buddha under the Bodhi tree. In this meditation
one is encouraged to contemplate the radiant and loving-kind presence of the Buddha,
foremost in the world in loving-kindness, before turning one’s own mind towards
generating metta. This is one powerful way of setting the tone or resonance for metta
practice. Sometimes opening the heart with faith and appreciation can be a good way to
incline the mind towards loving kindness. Likewise, generating the heart of loving
kindness can be helpful in deepening and strengthening the mind of faith as well. These
heart based qualities support one another.
*Also with a similar theme, there is a metta meditation where you will be guided in
meeting, paying respects to, and recollecting the example of Mahapajapati, the first
Bhikkhuni. This meditation combines sanghanussati with metta practice. In the
meditation we find Mahpajapati Bhikkhuni seated in the meditation posture under an
ancient Banyan tree, accompanied by several other Bhikkhuni‘s, radiating loving
kindness throughout the world. Inspired by her example, we then turn our minds to
metta.
*For those with a more faith based nature, there is a metta meditation which entails
visualizing Maitreya Bodhisatva, the next Buddha, sitting on his lotus throne in Dusita
heaven. We begin by contemplating his boundless metta filling all of space, and then
imagine receiving these blessings from Maitreya, before subsequently radiating this
quality from our own heart. This is a metta practice combining Devanussati.
*There is also a metta meditation incorporating the practice of forgiveness. Offering
forgiveness is an act of loving-kindness in itself. And practicing forgiveness is a
wonderful way to clear a space in the mind, for deepening the heart of loving kindness.
The first half of the meditation focuses upon forgiving oneself for past mistakes, and the
second half encourages the forgiveness of others. This is a gentle and encouraging
meditation.
Each meditation is clearly titled on the contents page. So I suggest exploring the ones
which you think would most likely bring the best results for your character. Simply give
them a try, and see how they go. If you are not familiar with a particular method, it
might be worth trying it several times before moving onto another, giving the method a
sincere trial. After having explored the CD at your own pace. Once you find a method
which seems to work for you. Try to stick with that particular method in a disciplined
way for some time. And once you have internalized the method, feel free to do away
with the guided meditations alltogether, and do it by yourself.
It might be useful to consider, with regards to meditation techniques, that the method is
not necessarily the most important, or the ‘all-important’ thing. The methods and
techniques are simply tools which can be utilized in order to generate certain qualities
and types of concentration. I was present when someone once asked Ajahn Anan, a very
gifted meditation master from Thailand, about meditation techniques, and he said that the
most important thing was not actually the technique, but rather the sincerity of the
intention, and the consistency of the mindfulness and effort of the meditator. Even so,
having some experience with different methods can be very useful.
If you have time, I recommend that you do the body sweeping meditation first, or one of
the breath meditations before your session of metta. The more mindfulness and clarity
you can generate in your body and mind, then the more mindfulness and clarity you can
bring to the practice of generating Loving Kindness.
If you are really serious about your aspiration to generate Loving Kindness. You may
also wish to occasionally spend a whole day, or a weekend, doing something of a
personal metta workshop retreat. You can do several of the metta meditations during the
day, punctuated by sessions of body sweeping or breath meditation.
Initially, some people might find that they can occasionally have some reactions after
generating loving-kindness deeply in the heart. It is rare, but sometimes meditators can
feel a bit grumpy after doing metta practice. Similarly, old griefs and painful memories
can occasionally burst into the mind during or after a session of metta. If this ever
happens to you, please do not lose heart, I would encourage you to see this kind of
experience as being part of a process of purification, or healing. Sometimes metta
meditation moves things which are stuck somehow. Try to see metta as a cool but strong
breeze blowing away dust in the mind. And feel confident that over time, the general
trend will be towards more happiness, contentment and brightness.
And equally important, if any painful memories do come up, try not to get lost in any of
the stories about the past… Why it shouldn’t have been the way it was…. Or how
things should have been. Remember that Ajahn Chah used to say that one of the most
important things to learn in our practice is how to let go. He would say. “If it isn’t
good, let it die, if it doesn’t die, then make it good.” The past is gone… Leave it where
it is… Fill the present with mindfulness and Loving Kindness.
And so lastly, I would like to wish you all every success in your metta meditation
practice. Keeping in mind that success as a meditator, does not necessarily mean
remarkable or blissful meditation all of the time. What we are aiming for in our practice,
along with peacefulness and joy… is a growth in mindfulness… a growth in
patience…
a growth in wisdom… and a growth in discipline and commitment as well.
And so may we all continue to grow in these wholesome and beautiful qualities.
And may we only ever think of benefiting each other.
Be Well.