May Huang (Limei Huang)
Mrs. Chocos
Seminar 126
12/8/2015
Neglect of Elderly in Families
Traffic lights frequently change; People hurriedly go through the downtown streets; in the
shop window, ubiquitous advertisements display beautiful or muscle models. All scenes tell that
it is a modern society that values youth and beauty. Elderly, generally refers to the age span from
65 to the end of life, becomes an invisible group in the society because of obvious declines of
physical and mental functions. It can easily evident in the appellation change of elderly. They are
no longer regarded as the senior rather the old people. The word “old” always goes hand in hand
with something that is not useful and not in good condition. Having been influenced by the
culture, people begin to leave out elderly in the family. Firstly, it is a culture of beauty, and aging
appearances such as wrinkle and weak body make families regard aging as a problem. Another
common cultural value for American is independence. They devote self to seeking independence,
and leave old parents. Meanwhile, the economic pressure forces them to trade the senior people
off for job and money. In order to relieve people’s burden of taking care of aging people, nursing
home emerges. But it becomes an excuse for family members to ignore the elderly. Culture,
economic pressure, and nursing homes are three factors that contribute to the neglect of elderly
in families.
Culture is a collection of arts, beliefs, customs, and morality. It largely influences people’s
attitude to the elderly. If the culture admires seniors, people would regard them as a wise group.
While living in a culture that considers aging as a problem, people would fear of old people and
neglect them. In “Aging in the Land of Young”, Sharon Curtin explained how she is affected by
the negative cultural attitudes toward the elderly. She admits, “A kind of cultural attitude makes
me bigoted against old people; it makes me think young is the best; it makes me treat old people
like outcast” (84). In a culture of youth and beauty, elderly’s aging appearance such as grey hair,
wrinkly face, and weak body is the opposite of the cultural value that would make people regard
them as a problem and fear of them. This negative cultural attitude towards the elderly is spread
through mass media, through book, and even through individuals to families. Taking the mass
media as an example. TV or movies cast minor roles for the elderly. They are generally depicted
as industrious bees take care of grandchildren; helpless group with poor hearing, eyesight, and
health; or even troublemakers live in nursing house. People who spend lots of time on mass
media and accept the information, are more likely to ignore old people in family. Additionally, if
parents treat old relatives poorly in families, having little mature and comprehend thinking
ability, children may imitate them, and accept the concept that the elderly is a problem without
question.
In spite of the culture of youth and beauty, American’s devotion to independence is another
cultural value leads families leave out old people. Children are expected to be independent at an
early age. For instance, many American parents give their newborn babies separate rooms and
cribs from the first day they come home from hospitals. As children grow older, parents will find
opportunities and fully utilize them in helping children to cultivate self-reliance such as learning
how to budget money, getting allowance through house working, or giving them adequate
freedom to make choices. A seed names “independence” plants in children’s mind. In school,
students need to do own work, manage time, and become own policy. Learning from these
practices, the independence seed grows up and controls children’s mind. Consequently, they
would always give priority to personal freedom rather than family needs. By thinking both
parents and self are unique individuals, children leave parents to establish new family. This
becomes the first step they begin to neglect the elderly because people potentially care new
family more than old parents. U.S. partment of Health and Human Services did a research about
the living condition of the elderly. According to the research, “about 28% (12.5 million) of
noninstitutionalized older persons in 2014 lived alone” (5). It means in approximately one of
four people is neglected by family. This percentage even does not count the people in institution
like nursing home who live without family. If added, it would be higher. Also, “Life Stages”, an
article wrote by Steven Mintz at the University of Houston, introduces family cycle as a crucial
construct that social historians use to measures the development of family. “Family with young
adult” is one stage of family cycle refers to the time from “departure of first to last children”
(32). The establishment of the notion proves that young adults live separately with old people
becomes the norm, and the elderly have been neglected.
Independence leads young adult leave old parents; the economic pressure makes them feel
unable to support old people in family. Many aging people generally need long-term medical
care because of the decline of physical functions. This could be a type of strains that asks family
member withdraws from working to take care of elderly. While during the economic recession
period when the salary of young adults is neither not enough to feed self nor pay for the medical
fee, they are more inclined to value their job and ignore old relatives in family. It may because
no matter families value the elderly or not, their blood relationship would not change. But people
are highly possible to be dismissed if do not value job. Though there are lots of possibilities with
the reason, the phenomenon that people pay more attention on jobs do exist. In “A world of HalfAdults”, Robert Bly points out that the society is one the way to no-parent family as the result of
economic recession. (51). Wages of a family significantly fall in this period, both parents have to
work to compensate family daily expenses. The more time adults spend on working, the less time
they can accompany, prepare healthy food, and take care of aging family members. Also they are
unwilling to pay for the elderly in families, which can briefly show in the demand for
governmental welfare. Information conveys from it is adults do not want to support senior people
rather they hope the government could take the responsibility.
In order to relieve people’s burden of taking care of the elderly, nursing homes exist, then
evolve into an excuse of ignoring old people. “They Shut My Grandmother’s Room Door” was
wrote by Andrew Lam. It talks about her grandmother’s experience of living in a nursing home.
Lam’s grandmother tells her lots of people in that nursing home are died alone in a room that is
locked by the nurse (93) Old people die alone because their family members seldom visit them
after sending them to nursing home. In those families’ eyes, nursing homes can provide
professional nursing care for the elderly in physical, mental, or emotional areas. Families may
assume that their aging relatives will get company and care from skilled nurses that will greatly
enhance of their lives. Instead of living in loneliness while their families are out working, the
elderly are around people their own age, so they can continue to communicate with them and
have a social life. Holding the assumed view that old people would have a better and happier life
in nursing homes, families begin to ignore them by reducing the visiting times. In other words,
nursing homes can be a factor contributes to the neglect of the elderly if families hold the view
that they pay for the elderly, and the nursing home should substitute for them to take care of
elderly. A statics published on U.S. Partment of Health and Human Services reported that “an
estimated 60 percent of nursing home residents never have visitors” (2). This data also verifies
that the emergence of nursing homes aggravates the abandonment of senior people in the
majority of families.
To sum up, culture shapes families’ attitude towards the elderly. Currently, people live in a
culture of youth and beauty. Elderly, the opposite of the culture, is neglect by families.
Independence is another cultural belief for American families. Therefore, people leave parents to
presume independence and think the elderly need to take responsible for self. Under the
economic pressure, families are more inclined to value job and ignore old people. Nursing homes
also aggravate the abandonment of aging people because lots of families seldom visit them and
care about them.
Works Cited
Bly, Robert. "A World of Half-Adults." Aging & Wisdom 126-G. Boston: Umass Boston, 2015.
50-51. Print.
Curtin, Sharon. "Aging in the Land of the Young." Aging & Wisdom 126-G. Boston: Umass
Boston, 2015. 84. Print.
Lam, Andrew. "They Shut My Grandmother's Room Door." Aging & Wisdom 126-G. Boston:
Umass Boston, 2015. 93-94. Print.
Mintz, Steven. "Life Stages." Aging & Wisdom 126-G. Boston: Umass Boston, 2015. 31-32.
Print.
U.S. Partment of Health and Human Services. "A Profile of Older Americans: 2014." Living
Arrangement (2014): 2-5. Aoa.acl.gov. U.S. Department of Health and Human Services.
Web. 10 Dec. 2015.