SAT Improving Sentences #2
These questions require that you choose the best, most effective form of a sentence. Below are the directions you will see
on the test.
Directions: For each question in this section, select the best answer from among the choices given and fill in the
corresponding circle on the answer sheet. The following sentences test correctness and effectiveness of expression. Part of
each sentence or the entire sentence is underlined; beneath each sentence are five ways of phrasing the underlined
material. Choice A repeats the original phrasing; the other four choices are different. If you think the original phrasing
produces a better sentence than any of the alternatives, select choice A; if not, select one of the other choices. In making
your selection, follow the requirements of standard written English; that is, pay attention to grammar, choice of words,
sentence construction, and punctuation. Your selection should result in the most effective sentence — clear and precise,
without awkwardness or ambiguity.
EXAMPLE: Laura Ingalls Wilder published her first book and she was sixty-five years old then.
(A) and she was sixty-five years old then
(B) when she was sixty-five
(C) at age sixty-five years old
(D) upon the reaching of sixty-five years
(E) at the time when she was sixty-five
Answer to Example SAT Improving Sentences
The Problem: The original sentence incorrectly combines the two clauses by coordination instead of subordination.
Right Answer: Because the second clause is subordinate to the first clause, a subordinating conjunction should be used.
Choice (B) supplies the subordinating conjunction when. The corrected sentence reads: Laura Ingalls Wilder published
her first book when she was sixty-five years old.
Wrong Choices:
All of the other choices make the mistake of wordiness. Choice (C) adds the unnecessary phrase years old.
Choice (D) awkwardly inverts natural word order with upon the reaching of.
Choice (E) unnecessarily adds at the time.
2. Chaplin will not be remembered for espousing radical causes any more than they will remember Wayne for endorsing
conservative political candidates.
(A) any more than they will remember Wayne
(B) as will Wayne not be remembered
(C) any more than Wayne will be remembered
(D) just as they will not remember Wayne
(E) no more than Wayne will be remembered
Tip: Compare the structures of phrases that are joined by conjunctions like and, but, or, than, and as. Parallel phrasing is generally
preferable to nonparallel phrasing.
Choose the correct answer to #2.
Then compose an explanation of your answer to #2 using the same format as the example. Use the Writing
Characteristics table and Language Practice notes to help.
The Problem:
Right Answer:
Wrong Choices: