From Spoon Theory to
Peer Support
Ellie Stewart
and
Naomi Salisbury
Nobody realizes that some
people expend tremendous
energy merely to be normal
Albert Camus
I explained that the difference in
being sick and being healthy is having
to make choices or to consciously
think about things when the rest of
the world doesn’t have to.
The healthy have the luxury of a life
without choices, a gift most people
take for granted.
- Spoon Theory by Christine Miserandino
www.butyoudontlooksick.com
Spoon Theory and BPD
How does
it relate to
BPD?
elanajohnson.blogspot.com
Spoon Theory and BPD
What’s
different for
BPD?
boards.straightdope.com
Spoon Theory and BPD
What’s the
same for
BPD?
coyerhanging.info
Spoon Theory and BPD
Spoons
and
Symptoms
http://claireneelymd.com/
Giving Spoons

feeling supported by friends


feeling supported by professionals


feeling understood


being heard


being kind to myself


doing relaxation


doing exercise


feeling appreciated


sense of belonging


sense of purpose


voluntary work

Taking Spoons

lack of support/understanding


exhaustion


dealing with intense emotions on daily basis


chronic anxiety


eating three meals a day


being under pressure


making decisions


relationship difficulties


loneliness, social isolation


professionals not returning phone calls


money worries


insomnia


chronic pain


planning the day

Everyone has Different Experiences







The symptoms
Getting and living with
the diagnosis
Treatment
What helps you
manage
Where you are in your
life
What support you need
Who you are!
www.standoutblogger.com
Peer Support
http://elearning.rcplondon.ac.uk/Pages/default.aspx

Something we have in
common and agree gives
us spoons!

In Edinburgh based around
an internet group and meets
about once a month for
coffee and a chat

Space to share experiences
and useful information and
where people feel
understood without having
to explain yourself
Don’t people just get together and
compare techniques?
“Peer Support is not about “joining a
club for the mentally ill”. It is not a
competition of stories or symptoms or
about being rescued or infantilized.”
– Peer Support: A Theoretical Perspective
What is Peer Support?
“It is about understanding another’s situation
empathically through the shared experience of emotional
and psychological pain. When people find affiliation with
others they feel are “like” them, they feel a connection.”
- Peer Support: A Theoretical Perspective
“In general, peer support has been defined by the fact
that people who have like experiences can better relate
and can consequently offer a more authentic empathy
and validation.”
– Peer Support: What Makes It Unique?
Peer Support in Scotland

Home-Grown Advocacy
Organisations

Lots of local and online
networks

Scottish Recovery
Network

Delivering for Mental
Health Peer Support
Worker Pilot Scheme

Towards a Mentally
Flourishing Scotland
Peer Support in Edinburgh

Wide range of groups
including BPD Social
Group

Meets at least once a
month for coffee and a
chat in a central location

Uses an online forum to
organise meetings and
discuss issues in
between

Forum to offer and get
support and information
How Does It Work?
 On
your own terms – come along to meet-ups or
post if you want to – no obligations and no pressure
 Level
of Anonymity – book club sign at meet-up,
not talking about the group if you meet outside it,
meeting in a busy central café, personal details only
shared by mutual agreement
 Reciprocal
– sometimes people get support or
information, sometimes they provide it – everyone
recognises everyone has something to bring
The best support I’ve found actually is this
group, cos like I say on the first meeting I
don’t know what I was looking for, a bunch of
I don’t know, loonies, what do a bunch of
BPD-ers look like? It was only when I sat
there in the cafe thinking I have no idea what
I’m looking for…
And that was a quite reassuring because
everybody’s quite normal…
What’s the Benefit?






Everyone is equal and everyone has something
to offer
Don’t have to explain yourself
Get useful information – for example around
benefits, health services and advocacy
Feel supported to make changes
Gain confidence from others who have ‘gone
before you’
Gain confidence from helping others who are
where you once were
Being part of BPD group has
been massively helpful to not
feel so alone, and see that
there are lovely, bright,
intelligent people with similar
experiences
What are the Limitations?
 Doesn’t
replace professional support and
treatment
 Is not crisis support
 Is not for everyone
 Need to be in the ‘right place’ – which is
different for everyone
 Personality clashes can happen
 If everyone gets ill at the same time it
might fold…
Why Does It Give You Spoons?

lack of support/understanding


exhaustion


dealing with intense emotions


relationship difficulties


loneliness, social isolation

All take away spoons, BUT can
be addressed by peer support
Why Does It Give You Spoons?

feeling supported by friends  

feeling understood


being heard


being kind to myself


feeling appreciated


sense of belonging


sense of purpose

The thing that has been particularly useful is
peer support, is actually sitting next to people
who appear relatively normal, who aren’t
howling at the moon, but who share certain
personality traits I guess.
They’re funny, witty, charming folk, yet they
experience some of the things that I do and it’s
that validation which is absolutely colossal, it’s
probably the biggest thing in all of this.
It’s feeling that I’m not that different to everybody,
because I think any mental health problem is
very isolating, and having that was great.
Thank You and Any Questions?

Thanks for listening

A huge thank you to
all the members of
the Edinburgh BPD
Social Group

Anything you want to
ask?
References
Evaluation of the Delivering for Mental Health Peer Support Worker Pilot Scheme –
Scottish Government Social Research
www.scotland.gov.uk/socialresearch
Mead, Shery, Hilton, David and Curtis, Laurie – Peer Support: A Theoretical
Perspective
http://www.mentalhealthpeers.com/pdfs/peersupport.pdf
Mead, Shery and MacNeil, Cheryl - Peer Support: A Systemic Approach
www.mentalhealthpeers.com/pdfs/PeerSupportSystemicApproach.pdf
Mead, Shery and MacNeil, Cheryl – Peer Support: What Makes It Unique?
http://www.mentalhealthpeers.com/pdfs/PeerSupportUnique.pdf
Miserandino, Christine – The Spoon Theory
http://www.butyoudontlooksick.com/articles/written-by-christine/the-spoon-theorywritten-by-christine-miserandino/
Contact Details
Ellie Stewart
squeeblegirl@gmail.com
Naomi Salisbury – CAPS Advocacy
naomi@capsadvocacy.org
0131 538 7177