Look How Far We`ve Come, In Writing 421 Lesley Hardwick Mr

advertisement

I chose this essay because Mr. Kelly provided criticism for it that I’ve used in every writing piece since then.

I’m also very fond

“Awk way to end the intro.” of this essay because I wrote about a nice memory that I’ve never shared with anyone before.

I began to write this essay by choosing a memory in my brain that makes me happy when I feel sad. After I chose this topic, the words just seemed to flow.

Chose event Brainstormed First draft

Peer edited

I thought that my heart was in the right place and I had the right ideas in this piece.

However, there were many choppy sentences and lots of awkward sentences. If I could change it now, I would want more fluency.

In the end, despite my awkward introduction paragraph, I did get some good feedback.

“A great story and fantastic tribute to your grandma.

Well done Lesley!”

This particular essay marked the very first six out of six that I’ve gotten in Mr. Kelly’s class. That’s one reason why I’ve chosen to talk about it. Another reason is because it’s one of my more emotional pieces. This essay helped me to really grow as a writer. It helped to bring out my emotional side of writing.

To write this piece, all I had to do was tell the truth. It was the easiest thing I’ve written this semester.

Picked a history Searched in heart for feelings

Peer edited Rough copy

After seeing this feedback from Mr. Kelly, I saw that the writing that came straight from the heart was not only easier to write, but more beautiful and sweeter to read.

Personally, I do think that this was my best work. However, this essay wouldn’t be where it is

“Lesley, I’m speechless. This was beautifully written! Excellent essay & tribute!” today without the help of my peer-editor, Brittany Murphy.

What I like about this essay is that all I had to do was tell the truth about the relationship with my twin to get full marks.

 Writing can be made fun!

 Respect

 Grammar

 Reading period is for reading

 Lab days

Download