ToD Marriage Series PowerPoint


Ryan White

Discuss the difference between Covenant and Contract.

Discuss why YHWH created the institution of marriage.

Discuss Genesis 1-3 from the aspect of a marriage covenant.

Discuss principles in Genesis 1-3 that can make your marriage blissful regardless of how bad it has become.

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Define the roles of a man and woman within a relationship.

Discuss marriage, divorce, and women’s rights in the ancient Near East.

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Compare and contrast marriage, divorce, and women’s rights in the ancient Near East with the Torah.

Discuss marriage, divorce, and women’s rights in the First Century

Compare and contrast views and rulings on marriage and divorce in First Century Judaism with the words of Yeshua and Paul.

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Marriage as a Covenant by Gordon Hugenberger Garden of Peace by Rabbi Shalom Arush Flame of Yahweh by Richard Davidson Divorce and Remarriage in the Bible by David Instone Brewer The Marriage Covenant by Derek Prince Marriage as Covenant by John Tartwater Madam I’m Adam (audio) by Rabbi Daniel Lapin

What God has Joined Together (audio) by Tim Hegg

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Genesis Sermon Series (audio) by Dr. Gordon Hugenberger ‘Adultery’ entry in the Encyclopedia of the Bible and Its Reception

The Family in the Old Testament by J. Andrew Dearman

Women in Mesopotamia by M. Stol

A New Understanding of the Divorce and Remarriage

Legislation in Deuteronomy 24:1-4 by Anthony Garrett

A Typology of Israelite Marriage: Kinship, Socio-Economic,

and Religious Factors by Allen Guenther

“No Fault” divorce introduced in 1970’s

Skyrocketing divorce rates

Over 50% of marriages today end in divorce

No difference between Christian and secular

Marriage rates down 33%

~70% of married people unhappy

Individual choice over moral responsibility

Individuality over community

Independence over interdependence


: “An elected, as opposed to natural, divine sanction.”


: “A private legal or commercial agreement of which the principle guarantors are the courts and community rather than God or the gods.”


Personal Relationship 2.

Election 3.

Obligation 4.


“Again I passed by you and looked upon you and saw that your time was the time of love. And I spread My skirt over you and covered your nakedness. And I swore an oath to you and entered into a covenant with you , and you became Mine,” declares the Master הוהי.

Death rates for divorced men are 70% higher than their married counterparts

Death rates for divorced women are 37% higher than their married counterparts

Unemployment rate amongst divorced men is 3 times higher than that of their married counterparts

Have we not all one Father? Did not one create us? Why do we act treacherously against one another, to profane the covenant of the fathers? Yehudah has acted treacherously, and an abomination has been done in Yisra’el and in Yerushalayim, for Yehudah has profaned what is set-apart to Let הוהי הוהי – which He had loved – and has married the daughter of a foreign mighty one. cut off from the tents of Ya’akov the man who does this – stirring up or answering, and bringing an offering to הוהי of hosts!

And this you have done a second time: you cover the altar of הוהי with tears, with weeping and crying, because He no longer regards the offering, nor receives it with pleasure from your hands


And you said, “Why?” Because הוהי has been witness between you and the wife of your youth, against whom you have acted treacherously, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant .

In the same way, husbands, live understandingly together, giving respect to the wife , as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the favor of life, so that your prayers are not hindered .

And if anyone does not provide for his own , and especially for those of his household, he has denied the belief and is worse than an unbeliever .

And did He not make one ? And He had the remnant of the Spirit? And what is the one alone? He seeks a seed of Elohim. So you shall guard your spirit, and let none act treacherously against the wife of his youth.

“For I hate divorce,” said הוהי Elohim of Yisra’ĕl, “and the one who covers his garment with cruelty,” said הוהי of hosts. “So you shall guard your spirit, and do not act treacherously.” (The Scriptures 1998+)

"If one hates and divorces," says Yahweh, God of Israel, "he covers his garments with violence," says Yahweh of Host, "Therefore take heed to yourself and do not be faithless [against your wife]“ (Hugenberger’s Rendition)

חלשׁ shalach H7971 – “to send out”

Idiom for “to divorce”

Deut 24:3, Isaiah 50:1

שׁרגּ garash H1644 – “drive out/driven out”

Idiom for “to divorce” or a divorced woman

Gen 21:10, Lev 21:7, 22:13, Num 30:10-12

תתירכ רפס sefer keritut H3748 – “bill of divorce”

Began with commitment and then searched for romance

Age: Girls 14-20, boys 26-32

Arranged, but still given a choice

Roles in the marriage


Civic and military affairs

Provides income, protects household, represents family in court


Administers the household and the family business


Given by the groom to the bride’s father

Usually ~1 years wages


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Given by the bride’s father to the bride In the husband’s control and/or sewn into the bride’s gown

Usually 5-25% of the estate

While it is never prohibited, the Scriptures teach monogamy as ideal

Most commonly practiced by commoners for the reason of progeny.

Surrogate motherhood

Cost prohibitive

Deut 17:17 & the Essenes

Witnessed adultery = death

Court proven adultery = divorce

Adulterous wife publically stripped

Suspected adultery – Numbers 5:11-31

ANE divine river ordeal

Lying about adultery

Deut 22:13-21

Attempt to steal dowry

Just Cause divorce

Children stay with father

Wife loses dowry

Childlessness was in contract as just ground Unjust Cause divorce

Generally accepted in the ANE

Dowry returned to wife

Deut 22 & Mal 2:16 imply this was unacceptable

Legal reasons for divorce

For man:

The woman is not a virgin

She refuses cohabitation

She commits adultery

She contracts a disease

She has bad behavior

Legal reasons for divorce

For woman (only in some cultures):

Bad behavior of the husband

He refuses cohabitation

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He is abroad for a long time (i.e. POW) If woman couldn’t prove neglect, she would be put to death

Some reasons included in marriage contracts such as in cases of polygamy

(Speaking of an amah or maidservant marriage): Exodus 21:10-11 “If he takes another wife, her food, her covering, and her marriage rights are not to be diminished. And if he does not do these three for her, then she shall go out for naught, without silver. “

Understood by most ANE cultures as well as all 3 major sects of Judaism in the 1 st Century.

Valid grounds for divorce were:

Lack of food

Lack of clothing

Lack of marital rights

Mainly sexual, but included was prohibition against physical abuse

Deuteronomy 24:1-4 “When a man takes a wife and shall marry her, then it shall be, if she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found a matter of uncoveredness in her , and he shall write her a certificate of divorce , and put it in her hand, and send her out of his house, and if she left his house and went and became another man’s wife, and the latter husband shall hate her and write her a certificate of divorce , and put it in her hand,

(cont) and send her out of his house , or when the latter husband dies who took her to be his wife, then her former husband who sent her away is not allowed to take her back to be his wife after she has been defiled, for that would be an abomination before הוהי .And do not bring sin on the land which הוהי your Elohim is giving you as an inheritance.

Due to poorer population, the bride-price was no longer paid; it was promised to the father of the bride and then paid if the man divorced the woman.

Fathers would give large dowries to ensure that the daughters would be self sufficient if death or divorce occurred.

Mishnah Ketubot 7.6

These are to be divorced without receiving their Kethubah [Dowry]: a wife who transgresses the Law of Moses or [one who transgresses] Jewish practice. And what is [regarded as a wife`s transgression against] the Law of Moses ? Feeding her husband with untithed food, having intercourse with him during the period of her menstruation, not setting apart her dough offering, or making vows and not fulfilling them.

And what [is deemed to be a wife`s transgression against] Jewish practice ? Going out with uncovered head, spinning in the street or conversing with every man. Abba Saul said: [such transgressions include] also that of a wife who curses her husband`s parents in his presence. R. Tarfon said: also one who screams. And who is regarded a screamer? A woman whose voice can be heard by her neighbours when she speaks inside her house.

Tosephta Ketubot 7.6 adds: " and she who goes out with bother her sides [shoulders] uncovered…and bathes in a public bath with any man." Mishnah Sotah 6.1

Requires trial by bitter waters even if she is found alone in a room with a man

Exodus 21:10-11 “If he takes another wife, her food, her covering, and her marriage rights are not to be diminished. And if he does not do these three for her, then she shall go out for naught, without silver. “

qol vahomer (argument from major to minor)

If this case is true…then surely this must be true

Lack of food, Lack of clothing, Lack of marital rights

Mishna Ketubah 5.6 - "...those without work, every day; workers, twice a week; donkey drivers, once a week, camel drivers, once in thirty days; sailors, once in six months - the words of R. Eliezer“

Rabbis allowed themselves 30 days of abstinence for Torah study...

Mishnah Gittin 9.10

Beth Shammai say: a man should not divorce his wife unless he has found her guilty of some unseemly conduct, as it says, because he hath found some unseemly thing in her. Beth Hillel, however, say [that he may divorce her] even if she has merely spoilt his food, since it says, because he hath found some unseemly thing in her. R. Akiba says, [He may divorce her] even if he finds another woman more beautiful than she is, as it says, it cometh to pass, if she find no favor in his eyes.

Matthew 19:3-6 And the Pharisees came to Him, his wife for every reason trying Him , and saying to Him, “Is it right for a man to put away ?” And He answering, said to them, “Did you not read that He who made them at the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘For this cause a man shall leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh ’? “So that they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what Elohim has joined together, let man not separate .”

Matthew 19:7-9 They said to Him, “ put her away adultery .” Why then did Mosheh command to give a certificate of divorce, and to ?” He said to them, “Because of the hardness of your hearts , Mosheh was not so. “And I say to you, allowed marries another, commits adultery . you to put away your wives, but from the beginning it whoever puts away his wife, except on the ground of whoring, and And whoever marries her who has been put away commits

Matthew 19:10-12 His taught ones said to Him, “If such is the case of the man with his wife, receive it.” it is good not to marry .” And He said to them, “Not all receive this word, but only those to whom it has been given, for there are eunuchs who were so born from their mother’s womb, and there are eunuchs who were made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the reign of the heavens. He who is able to receive it, let him



Monogamy Gen 1:27 was standard proof text, see Damascus document CD 4:20-5:6 2.


Marriage should be lifelong Divorce is not God’s will 3.


Divorce is not compulsory, even with adultery Hardness of hearts – Unwilling to repent



Marriage is not compulsory Thus infertility is not valid grounds for divorce 5.


Divorce for “any matter” is invalid Ruling against Hillel 6.


Remarriage is invalid after an “any matter” divorce Ruling against Shammai

1 Corinthians 7:1-4 And concerning the matters you wrote to me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. But because of whoring, let each one have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband. likewise also the wife to her husband does. Let the husband render to his wife what is her due, and . The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife

1 Corinthians 7:5-8 Do not deprive one another except with agreement for a time, to give yourselves to fasting and prayer.

And come together again so that Satan does not try you because of your lack of self-control. And I say this as a concession, not as a command. For I wish that all men were even as I myself. But each one has his own gift from Elohim, one in this way and another in that. And I say to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain even as I am

1 Corinthians 7:9-13 but if they do not have self-control, let them marry, for it is better to marry than to burn. And to the married I command, not I, but the Master: A wife should not separate from a husband. But if she is indeed separated, let her remain unmarried or be restored to favour with her husband, and let a husband not send away a wife . And to the rest I say, not the Master: If any brother has an unbelieving wife, and she thinks well to live with him, let him not send her away. And a woman who has an unbelieving husband, and he thinks well to live with her, let her not send him away .

1 Corinthians 14-16 For the unbelieving husband has been set-apart in the wife, and the unbelieving wife has been set apart in the husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are set-apart. And, wife? if the unbelieving one separates, let him separate himself . A brother or a sister has not been enslaved in such matters. But Elohim has called us to peace. For how do you know, O wife, whether you shall save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you shall save your

Standard Jewish Divorce Certificate:

You are free to marry any Jewish man you wish

1 Corinthians 7:39 A wife is bound by Torah as long as her husband lives, and if her husband dies, she is free to be married to whom she desires, only in the Master.

qol vahomer – We know remarriage after a valid divorce is possible…

“Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body” “An eye is unable to say to the hand, “I have no need of you” “Those members of the body which are thought to be weaker are necessary” “To those of the body which we think to be less respected, these we present greater respect”

“The husband is head of the wife, as also the Messiah is head of the assembly” “Husbands, love your wives, as Messiah also did love the assembly and gave Himself for it” “Husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself”

Ryan White

Genesis 2:24

Malachi 2:15

Matthew 19:5-6 (Mark 10:8)

1 Corinthians 6:16

Ephesians 5:31

Proverbs 5:19

A loving deer and a pleasant doe! Let her breasts satisfy you at all times. And be captivated by her love always.

Written by Mosheh

Focus on marital relationship

Multiple viewpoints

Ancient Near Eastern treaty language



Vs.4 הוהי Elohim

Historical Prologue

Vs.5-14 Adam created and given the Garden


Vs.15 Work and Guard (a job)

Vs.17a Do not eat…



Vs.18-22 Woman made for Adam


Vs.17b You will surely die

Dynastic Disposition

Vs.24 Leave his mother and father

Genesis 1:26-28

Departure from ANE norm

Created as king and queen

Image-bearers of Elohim

Romans 9:20

Differentiation of sexes

Principle of the Seed

Genesis 2:7-18

What’s wrong with being single?

Why was Adam created first?

What was the cure for man’s ineptitude?

What’s about the study of Torah?




Hosea 13:9, Isaiah 41:10;13, Psalm 33:20, Exodus 18:4

Subordinate or other half?




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Why is it important to be “opposite”?

“Standing in front of while facing”

Much like a mirror

Wife as our mirror

Reflection of male leadership

1 Corinthians 11:1

Amplification of the leader

How to correct your spouse

How to become the king


Similarity to Genesis 15

Meaning of the word ‘love’

Why use the rib?

Comparison to ANE literature

Covenantal Oath

1 Chronicles 11:1


Why compliment Ishah if there were no other women around to compete with?

Ish and Ishah

(Man/Husband) (Woman/Wife)

(Insert fire graphic)

Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one lifts his companion up. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, for he has no one to help him up. Also, if two lie down together, they keep warm; but how does one keep warm by himself? Although one might be overpowered, two withstand him. And a threefold cord is not readily broken.

Ba’al = husband, pagan deity, animal, or inanimate object

Proverbs 1:17, Isaiah 41:15

Ba’al role is:

Owner or master, to have domination over something or someone, or decision-making member of the community

Ish refers to man as counterpart or companion

Why does the man have to leave his father?

‘Leave’ (azab)

Deuteronomy 28:20

Comparison to ANE literature

Dynastic disposition

Why leave the mother?

You MUST put your wife first


Deut 11:22, 30:20; Ruth 1:14

Two become Echad Basar

Ephesians 5:28-29

More than physical nakedness

Arom (H6174)

Not fully clothed or not clothed in normal manner

Erom (H5903)

Full and shameful nudity

Why was the serpent in Gan Eden?

Why does the serpent speak to Ishah?

Serpent = nachash (H5175/5172)

Brass, enchantment, shining

Males attracted through eyes, Females through ears

Crafty = Arum (H6175)

םורע םוּרע

How was the serpent ‘cunning’?

Who received the divine mandate?

Covenant lawsuit against the Creator

Ishah’s response

Serpent’s rebuttal

Usurping authority

Reversing the hierarchy

Erom vs. Arom – shame

Why is this written?

Hosea 2:3 – Stripped naked

What is the significance of fig leaves?

What would have been the proper course of action?

Historical Prologue

Calling of Witnesses


Indictment of the accused

Verdict rendered

Who’s fault was it?

Transference of authority

The woman vs. my wife

Taking responsibility

Does arguing, criticizing, or blaming ever work?

“The serpent deceived me…”

Pattern: Punishment -> blessing

“Her desire shall be for her husband and he shall rule over her”

Overcomes natural instinct

Difficulty in raising children

Mashal (H4910)

2 Samuel 23:3, Proverbs 17:2, Zechariah 6:13

Matthew 20:25-26

Genesis 1 – ‘subdue’ (kabash H3533) and ‘rule’ (radah H7287)

Desire and rule

Genesis 4:7

Her desire, NOT his desire

Only Adam gets any explanation

Punishment and Blessing

Productivity and purpose

Free vs. earned

Change the name, change the role/function

Restoration of marriage/Covenant renewal

Covenant ratification ceremony

Name given

Animal Sacrificed

Same terminology used in Leviticus 8:7 for the kohenim

According to Leviticus 7:8, the skins of sacrificed animals belong exclusively to the priesthood

(Re)adoption and reconfirmation of continuity of inheritance

Sent out = Shalach

Deuteronomy 22:19, 24:3

Isaiah 50:1

Drove out = Garash

Genesis 21:10, Leviticus 21:7, 14

Why only Adam?