It is duly noted that most people spend most of their awake moments in some form of
communication activity and the majority of this activity is spent on listening. And for
those who really pay attention, it yields great results in positive outcome for them, be
it workplace, personal or family(Kline, 2).
In may 2021, I met up with a close friend, Linda, so we can brainstorm on
what to do about the challenge I was facing as a newbie in my work place. while
narrating my ordeal to her, I mentioned my inability to work as a team member as a
result of my shyness and the negative image it was giving me at work, I waited for her
input but Linda ends up talking about the necessity of being a team player and how
she was the best at her work place. I felt unheard and dismissed, as Linda's selective
listening(Nichols, 2017), caused her to miss the crucial part of my narration about my
shyness being a major challenge for me. This attitude undermined the purpose of our
meeting up and caused the conversation to become strained as she couldn't empathize
with my inexperience and shyness and as a result, our friendship became distant.
When I was working as an intern, my company organized a picnic for all
junior staff and I was in charge of organizing it. I contacted the caterer for our
preference for food and drinks, but, on the day of the event, I saw an order entirely
different from what I had discussed with her. I called her, to deliberate on what to do
to correct the mistake but she did not let me finish and she began to accuse me of
trying to destroy her business image. all attempt to calm her down so we can come to
a settlement, proved abortive. this defensive listening(Gudykunst, 2015), displayed by
the caterer produced a wrong image of her business ethics and necessitated a negative
customer feedback from my company which shutdown future opportunity her
business may have with my company.
I left my baby brother with a cousin Esther as my mom was at work and I
needed to get something urgently from the mall for an assignment the following day.
before leaving, I instructed her not to leave him alone to play at the backyard, so he
will not injure himself or get bitten, she nodded and said, she understood, so I left for
the mall. on my way back from the mall, I got a call from my mom and she said, my
baby brother was at the emergency ward at the hospital. when I got to the hospital, I
met my cousin to find out what had happened, Esther said, she did not know I had
told her not to let him play outside alone. This pseudo listening (Smith 45), behaviour
diminished my trust in her ability to be careful and attentive, it also endangered my
baby brother and caused a fall out between my mom and I.
Works cited
Nichols, M. P. (2017). The lost art of listening: How learning to listen can improve relationships. The
Guilford Press.
Gudykunst, W. B. (2015). Bridging Differences: Effective Intergroup Communication. SAGE
Publications.
Floyd, K. (2017). Interpersonal communication. McGraw-Hill Education.
Kline, John A., and Air University (US). Listening effectively. Maxwell AF Base, Montgomery, AL: Air University Press, 1996.