Immunity to Change WORKBOOK THE CHANGE Evolutionist.COM MY SELF IMPROVEMENT GOAL Choose a goal that would make a big difference, one you truly want to achieve. Ask yourself, "What is the single most powerful change I could make to improve my life (or work performance, relationship, finances)? " Here are some guidelines: 1. It can't be dependent on the cooperation or efforts of another person or circumstance. 2. There needs to be measurable room for improvement. 3. It must be important to you (e.g., on a scale of 1-5, it's a solid 4 or 5) Take your time answering the following questions. Find a place where you can sit comfortably without interruption. Don't be afraid to dig deep and be brutally honest with yourself. Self-Improvement Goal What goal do I want to accomplish? Is this goal necessary? Why? THE CHANGE Evolutionist.COM Pg. 2 What actions am I currently taking to realize this goal? Next, specify concrete behaviors that would be necessary to achieve this goal. Make sure your statements are: 1. In the now ("I am" not "I want to") 2. Positive 3. Express what you want, not what you don't want What do I need to do differently to realize this goal? e.g., improving focus by putting my phone on silent while I work, having the patience to hear someone out before speaking, or setting the alarm to get up earlier. THE CHANGE Evolutionist.COM Pg. 3 BEHAVIORS THAT TRIP ME UP Ask yourself, "What thing do I do or not do that gets in the way of my goal?" Take stock of the things you do (behaviors) that get in the way of achieving your goal. You don't need to explain or understand your obstructionist behaviors. Just notice them and write them down. Define your actions, not your feelings. What behaviors am I participating in that conflict with my goal? e.g., Waking up late, seeking out distractions like my phone or TV, or buying junk food. What will avoiding this goal or change cost me? THE CHANGE Evolutionist.COM Pg. 4 MY COMPETING COMMITMENTS Ask yourself, “What would happen if I stopped the behavior that prevents me from achieving my goals?” Picture yourself in the same situation that triggers the behavior you don’t like and imagine yourself responding differently. As you imagine this alternate scenario, what are you feeling and thinking? What makes not doing the behaviors that trip you up so scary? Jot these down in the worry box. Worry Box e.g., I fear that if I stopped doing [blank], I would [blank]... Now ask yourself, “By engaging in the behaviors that trip me up, what worrisome outcome am I committed to preventing?” The resulting answer is your competing commitment. THE CHANGE Evolutionist.COM Pg. 5 Competing Commitment e.g., I am more committed to doing this other thing than the behavior that accomplishes my goal. List as many as you can. MY BIG ASSUMPTIONS (BA) Big assumptions, says Lahey, “are the beliefs and internalized truths we hold about how the world works, how we work, and how people respond to us. They are assumptions that make each hidden commitment feel necessary.” Look for assumptions that anchor and inform your specific hidden commitments. Notice how your assumptions lead to the very behaviors that undermine, rather than support, your goal. On the next page, take your time to pinpoint the core beliefs that support the conflicting behaviors preventing you from accomplishing your goal. THE CHANGE Evolutionist.COM Pg. 6 Big Assumption #1 e.g., I am more committed to doing those other things (my competing commitments) because I believe not doing them or doing something else would... Big Assumption #2 Big Assumption #3 THE CHANGE Evolutionist.COM Pg. 7 LITTLE EXPERIMENTS TO TEST MY BA First, decide what behavior would challenge your big assumptions. Then, imagine a realistic situation that could discredit your big assumption. Follow Kegan and Lahey’s SMART strategy: Safe, Modest, Actionable, Research-based, and Tested. The point of unearthing your big assumptions and testing them is to question ideas and beliefs that you’ve assumed to be universal truths. Once you bring awareness to the big assumptions, test their validity, and examine the data, you can change your behavior to support your improvement goal. Experiment #1 Did this assert or refute my big assumption? Explain. Assert Refute THE CHANGE Evolutionist.COM Pg. 8 Experiment #2 Did this assert or refute my big assumption? Explain. Assert Refute Experiment #3 Did this assert or refute my big assumption? Explain. Assert Refute THE CHANGE Evolutionist.COM Pg. 9 REMEMBER, CHANGE IS GOOD! You are an ever-evolving human being. Change is part of your DNA, and therefore unavoidable. But that's a good thing, because change ultimately brings renewal and growth. It's a revelation of all the possibilities and opportunities you can create for yourself and others. Through this process, I hope you’ve received a most powerful gift - the awareness that although change is often complex and even scary, it's often in your best interest. You are a change evolution. THE CHANGE Evolutionist.COM Pg. 10