East Los Angeles College
Name: ___________________________
Chapter 2 Lab: Writing Improvement Exercises
Audience Benefits and the “You” View
Your Task. Revise the following sentences to emphasize the perspective of the audience and the
“you” view.
1. We are taking the proactive step of issuing all our customers new chip-enabled credit cards ti
replace expired or lost cards and prevent increasingly costly payouts we have suffered from
fraud.
2. We take great pride in announcing our new schedule of low-cost, any-day flights to Hawaii.
3. Our strict safety policy forbids us from renting power equipment to anyone who cannot
demonstrate proficiency in its use.
4. We’re requesting that all employees complete the attached online survey by April 1 so that we
may develop a master schedule for summer vacations more efficiently.
5. Our social media engineers are excited to announce a new free app called Fan Boosters that
we believe will get fans to share, like, and subscribe to your content..
6. To save the expense of having team trainers set up your training classes in our limited office
space, we suggest offering a customized class for your employees right in your own building.
7. Because we take pride in our national policy of selling name brands at discount prices, we can
allow store credit but we cannot give cash refunds on returned merchandise..
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East Los Angeles College
Conversational but Professional
Your Task. Revise the following to make the tone conversational yet professional.
1. As per your recent request, the undersigned is happy to inform you that we are sending you
forthwith the procedure manuals you requested.
2. Kindly be informed that it is necessary for you to designate the model number of the
appliance before we can submit your order.
3. BTW, Angela went ballistic when the manager accused her of ripping off office supplies..
4. Pursuant to your e-mail of the 12th, please be advised that your shipment was sent April 15..
5. R head honcho wz like totally ragget kuz I wz sick n stuff n mist the team meet. Geez!
6. The undersigned respectfully reminds affected individuals that employees desirous of
changing their health plans must do so before December 1.
Positive and Courteous Expression
Your Task. Revise the following statements to make them more positive.
1. Construction on your building is at a standstill because the contractor is unable to pour
footing until the soil is no longer soggy.
2. A passport cannot be issued until an application is completed and a recent photo is included.
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East Los Angeles College
3. Your message of April 1 claims that the blade in your food processor malfunctioned.
Although you apparently failed to read the operator’s manual, we are sending you a
replacement blade PLUS another manual. Next time read page 18 carefully so that you will
know how to attach this blade.
4. Customers are ineligible for the 25 percent discount if they fail to provide the discount code
at the time of purchase.
5. As team leader, you apparently failed to remember that you have already assigned me two
gigantic and complex research tasks, and now you have dumped another big job on me – one
that I can’t possibly begin until after I finish the other two jobs.
6. We regret to announce that we can offer the 50 percent discount only to the first 25 buyers, so
act quickly.
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East Los Angeles College
Grammar/Mechanics Checkup 2
Pronouns
Review Section 1.07-1.09 in the Grammar/Mechanics Handbook. Then study each of the following
Statements. Underscore any inappropriate form, and write a correction in the space provided. Also
record the appropriate G/M section and letter to illustrate the principle involved. If a sentence is
correct, write C.
its
Example. The Employee Benefits Committee will make (a) its, (b) their
recommendation soon.
_____________1. I was expecting Charisse to call. Was it (a) she, (b) her who left the message?
_____________2. Every player on the girls’ must wear (a) her, (b) their uniform to be able to play.
_____________3. Every e-mail sent between the CEO and (a) he, (b) him was revealed in the court case.
_____________4. (a) Who, (b) Whom did you say would replace the manager?
_____________5. It looks as if (a) yours, (b) your’s is the only report that cites electronic sources
correctly.
_____________6. Kevin asked Sierra and (a) I, (b) me, (c) myself to help him complete his research.
_____________7. My friend and (a) I, (b) me, (c) myself were interviewed for the same job.
_____________8. To park the car headed uphill, turn (a) it’s, (b) its front wheels away from the curb
and let it roll back a few inches.
_____________9. Give the budget figures to (a) whoever, (b) whomever asked for them.
_____________10. Everyone except the interviewer and (a) I, (b) me, (c) myself heard the alarm.
_____________11. No one knows that case better than (a) he, (b) him, (c) himself.
_____________12. A proposed budget was sent to (a) we, (b) us owners before the vote.
_____________13. One of the female travelers left (a) their, (b) her smartphone on the seat.
_____________14. Isabella and (a) I, (b) myself, (c) me are in charge of the office charity drive.
_____________15. If neither Justin nor I receive confirmation of our itinerary, (a) him and me, (b) him
and I, (c) he and I cannot make the trip.
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