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SOCIAL SUPREMACY
The No B.S. Social Circle Guide To Getting 9s & 10s
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Copyright © Hancel Villatoro, 2020
All Rights Reserved.
No part of this publication may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means,
mechanical or electronic, including photocopying and recording, or by any information storage
and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publisher, except in the case or brief
quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.
Requests for permission for or further information on usage of this document should be
addressed to: viphancel@gmail.com
Legal Notice
The Purchaser or Reader of this publication assumes responsibility for the use of these materials
and information. Adherence to all applicable laws and regulations, federal, state, and local, or
any other jurisdiction is the sole responsibility of the Purchaser or Reader.
The Author and Publisher assume no responsibility or liability whatsoever on the behalf of any
Purchaser or Reader of these materials.
ANY PERCEIVED SLIGHTS OF SPECIFIC PEOPLE OR ORGANIZATIONS ARE
UNINTENTIONAL.
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Table of Contents:
Preface
PART 1 — SOCIAL CIRCLE FUNDAMENTALS
1. High Status Mentality
7
2. Defining Your Social Circle
14
3. Social Intelligence
18
4. Attraction God
26
5. 9 & 10 Game
33
6. Comfort & Trust
39
7. Meta Game
43
8. Career Options
47
9. Qualification
49
10. Logistics
54
11. Social Capital
58
12. VIP Nightlife Access
64
13. Crushing Your City
69
14. End Game
74
15. Lifestyle
79
16. Real Life Exemplars
82
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PART 2 — SOCIAL MEDIA GAME
17. Influencer Mentality
18. Account Aesthetics
19. Social Proof
20. Content Creation
21. Two Main Triggers
22. Follower Growth
23. Sliding Into DMs
24. Instagram Stories
25. Matrix Hack: Photography
Part two will be dripped out 8 days from release date. The reason is because I want
you to get familiar with social circle fundamentals first. For every piece of content
you read, double up on action to internalize the concepts. And by doing so, you
will know how to navigate your social media presence in a more effective manner.
Thanks for your patience.
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PREFACE
“The laziest people are the most successful.”
In April 2020, while the entire world was on lockdown because of the coronavirus
pandemic, leaving every nation shocked, the idea for a social circle book on getting
9s & 10s was born. The idea of writing a book always intrigued me and with the
world in lockdown, what better use of my time than to throw myself into this
project and write what I wish I had when I first started in the game.
You see, seven years ago I found the world of mens dating advice on accident
while browsing through YouTube. I didn’t really know what it was, but I thought to
myself, “I can learn this stuff?” And that began a journey of self-discovery that at
the time, didn’t know would be one of the most difficult ones I could could embark
upon. If you’ve been at this game for over six months (where most quit), you know
what I mean. But I was hooked. This was something I wanted to not only get good
at for my own pleasures, it was something I wanted to master.
It was an era where young guys challenged themselves to become better men by
facing their gut wrenching fears of approaching beautiful women. I was one of the
guys running cold approach game on women at every opportunity I could find. I
became obsessed with the game while neglecting other areas of my life.
And this is why I wrote this book on LEVERAGE. Although this book was not as
difficult to write as I thought it’d be, I did find challenges on finishing it. The
biggest challenge was three days before releasing the book where I had several
chapters left to write and my creativity was fading. It was all written, edited and
finished in less than a month in LA with the help of friends and family.
If someone would have told me to start with social circle game using cold
approach techniques to build a successful life, rather than cold approaching girls
just to get laid, then I would of been where I am today three or four years ago. That
pains me to think about and I feel responsible to point the younger generation in
the right direction to avoid the same mistakes I made as a young king.
I’ve coached hundreds of guys face to face & hundreds of thousands online. In
Vegas, I was going out to nightclubs to coach EVERY NIGHT for just under three
years. Insane, I know. Each night, before walking into the club, I’d start with a 30
minute pre-brief where I would ask students, “what do you want?” And the
answers I would get were really eye opening because they were mostly about
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getting away from pain. “I want to stop feeling like a loser”, “I feel like girls are
such an important part of life for a guy and I can’t get them”, “I want sexual
abundance”, “I want to be able to get any girl I want, whenever I want”, “I am a
virgin and I want to get laid”, “I want a girlfriend that’s into threesomes”, “I’m
miserable and I want to be happy”, “I just want a girlfriend because I’ve never had
one” and on and on different guys would tell me their most painful secrets.
The reason I added this in here is because most guys go through life where no one
asks them such a simple question. Consequently, they keep all that pain and their
desires inside of them. Therefore they never achieve much. So here I ask you:
“what do you want?”
I want to add, as a young man, I wasn’t really a loser like most of these gurus say
they were to try and make you connect with them, I was always able to get girls,
but when I found the game, it was an opportunity to get even better. The biggest
problem was that running around cold approaching girls instead of BUILDING
MY DREAMS was a colossal waste of time. And time, I’ve found, is our most
valuable asset that never returns.
Using cold approach pickup to only get laid is thinking too small. It’s a valuable
skill that should be used to aid you in building a social circle of high quality people
that fulfill your needs as a man. From women, to friends, to mentors, to
acquaintances, to building a badass social life.
By following the hard earned lessons in this book, you will shave years off your
learning curve. The books focus is designed to help you infiltrate high status social
circles, position yourself to date whoever you want and design the ultimate
lifestyle, all while increasing your own personal fulfillment.
I’ll show you how to get exactly what you want by influencing the highest quality
people that’ll get excited about helping you achieve YOUR goals. This is what
social circle game did for me. By implementing what you read as fast as possible
and suspending disbelief, you too can achieve even greater heights.
Thank you for placing a bet on yourself by investing in this written course. You are
about to embark on a journey that will get you an abundance of 9s & 10s, access to
any one you’d want to meet and the life you didn’t even know you wanted.
— VIP Hancel
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Chapter 1
HIGH STATUS MENTALITY
“As you think, so shall you become.” — Bruce Lee
What separates average people from the powerful? How is it that some people are
just winning over and over yet their lesser counterparts aren’t? And why do some
seem to have it all while others struggle with life’s basic necessities? The answer is
simple, and it has been beaten to death in the self help industry that it has been
completely overlooked as a concept. When you hear it, you say to yourself, “yeah,
I knew that, but how do I REALLY become successful?” And yet people never
seem to escape this internal battle of mediocrity.
So what is the answer to the above questions? Here it is: the difference in
mediocrity to massive success is in how one THINKS multiplied by luck. How
they think about themselves, the world & their beliefs about the two. Multiplied by
luck and you have a recipe for success. My intention with this book, is to show you
things that were hidden in plain sight. The way you see the world, is how your
current reality has unfolded for you. If you are not happy with your current reality,
then it all starts with your thoughts.
Thoughts ➔ Emotions ➔ Action ➔ Results
Change your thoughts, change your world. And no, this isn’t some positive
thinking stuff. This is a consistent thought pattern of the life you want to be living,
and constantly focusing on that future. As a matter of fact, that is the only thing
that should be taking up space in your mind; the future life you want to create.
Why? Because you don’t get what you want, you get what you THINK about
MOST of the time. I’ll share with you some actionable methods on how to armor
yourself with laser like focus so that the distractions of the world, do not enter your
thoughts. Only the life you dream of.
Here are three actionable steps you MUST take in order to have a chief aim. This
keeps you on track instead of drifting like most people do; aimless in life. The
reason it’s difficult for most people to reach their goals is not the effort it takes, or
the work required, it is in NOT setting a target in the first place.
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You have to know where you’re going at all times. Be intentional about your
desires. Anything less than this and you will get exactly what you deserve vagueness.
The three actionable steps are:
1.) Vision boards
2.) Vision card
3.) Environment
Vision Boards
You must create three vision boards to get you clear as fuck. No more “idk”
responses. Domination requires everything. And a clear vision does exactly that.
You will create three separate vision boards: one is for money, status & material
things. The second is for iconic figures in life that you get inspired by. And the
third one is for the beautiful women you want to date and have around.
The bigger the vision board the better. You will cut out HD quality photos from
magazines or print them out from your computer in full color. Paste them, pin them
or tape them to the vision board in a way where there are no white spaces. Once
you do this for each of the three vision boards, you will then hang it up in your
place or room where you can see it everyday. You must see it daily. So your
subconscious mind can pick up on it 24/7. This will start attracting your desires
towards you vs what most people do and chase. When you chase things elude you.
DO NOT SKIP this or say you will do it later. Because you cannot make quality
decisions in the present without a desirable future. Do it now. Get it out of the way.
This is the foundation to the giant skyscraper that you will be building which is
your dream life. The taller the skyscraper the deeper, stronger & unshakable the
foundation must be. There will be roadblocks in your journey to social supremacy
and your vision will be the jet fuel that arouses you to plow through and keep
going. Your vision is what will keep you internally motivated.
Vision Card
This is one is much easier. All you have to do is grab a 3x5 blank card and write
your NUMBER ONE goal on the front. This could be an income, girl, travel or
material goal that you really, really want. This will again keep your mind focused
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on what you want, not on what you don’t want. It’s a constant reminder for your
subconscious mind to know what to work on. It’s a constant reminder to keep your
eye open for opportunities that will start coming towards you, so you can capitalize
on them. On the back you will write the following phrase:
“Ask. Believe. Receive.”
You must laminate it to preserve its condition because you will carry this card with
you until you get what you wrote on it. Why? Because at random times, you will
look into your pockets for something and there it will be, a reminder of what your
working towards. Your WHY. You will get small hits of inspiration, increase of
desire & get excited to keep taking massive action. Shocking how most do not do
this. And finally…
Environment
Willpower is bullshit. Your environment controls your behavior way more than you
can possibly imagine. Your goal is not to FORCE yourself to do what you know
will help you achieve your vision. Your goal is to CHOOSE your environments
carefully to make behavioral changes much easier on yourself. Design your
environment or enter environments that have the people, girls, lifestyle that you
want. And you will start magically attracting all the things you’ve always wanted.
Everyone tries to change themselves while remaining in the same environments.
It’s incredibly difficult to change under those conditions.
It’s a subconscious condition. It’s hard to change your personality in front of the
same people that hold a certain image of you in their minds. And we want to be
consistent with those that know us. This is why I left LA to create my dream life in
Vegas. My family & friends knew me a certain way. But in Vegas? No one knew
me, so I was able to transform myself into the image I held in my mind for so long
but was afraid to LIVE out. Success came at such rapid speeds that at times I
couldn’t believe I was living in a 2 million dollar penthouse, dating 10s & getting
paid to teach social circle game. It all came so fast but I realized it was because I
aligned myself with a new circle and entered a new environment where all of that
was NORMAL.
"If you want to change your life, you have to change the people around you.” — Nav
Take the same person and put them in all of the following environments and they
will act according to those around them. For example:
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Most people act quiet inside libraries because of the environment. Most people
dance & drink at nightclubs because of the environment. Most people sit quietly
waiting to be called upon at the doctors office because of the environment. Most
people go crazy with their friends at a party because of the environment. Most
people that hang out with multi-millionaires make more money & improve their
life because of the environment. You get the idea.
So again, either design an environment conducive to what you want to achieve or
enter environments where people are already doing what you want to achieve.
Through osmosis you will learn much faster, much easier than you ever could on
your own. Therefore, stop trying to do things solo, because you when you go solo
you get so low. Now, let’s talk about a few concepts I strongly believe will help
you internalize the mindset needed to murder this game.
Abundant Reality
Only by developing a deep abundance mentality around girls, money, freedom,
good emotions, etc. will your reality begin to match that state. Because in every
decision you make you are either operating out of one of two states: scarcity or
abundance. You cannot do both at the same time. You must ONLY think in terms of
abundance. And this is on a moment by moment basis. “Will I operate abundantly
as if everything is already taken care of? Or will I operate out of scarcity, in fear of
the unknown?” At every single moment of the day you subconsciously ask yourself
this question before moving forward with a new decision. But. Just thinking, “I’m
abundant, I’m abundant, I’m abundant” is not enough.
Here’s your actionable initiation into abundance:
You must KNOW and FEEL like you already have everything you want, need or
desire right now. Before you see physical evidence you must FEEL like it’s already
yours. I know, it’s a catch-22 because you currently don’t SEE it or HAVE it but
that’s irrelevant as long as you hold on to the FEELING of your desire. And you
must do this independent of the conditions in your life, independent of the
emotions and habits of your body, and for an extended period of time. Why do
this? So that you can create a NEW reality for yourself. Because if you’re not
creating, then don’t expect anything new. What is it that you want in abundance?
Girls? Female friends? High status friends? Money? Options? Well, whatever
future you want to attract, you must experience it NOW by feeling it now and
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thinking about it now. Because once you feel like you already have what you want,
why would you go looking for it?
Next, take massive fucking action. Put in the work. Run up the numbers. Increase
your effort. Because although you will be attracting abundance internally, you must
take action to fully receive it externally. You must take what you want in life, no
one will ever just hand it to you. Take action and take what you desire in an
unapologetic manner. Fuck what people think or say. Losing the need for approval
is the most important mental state for any young male. As a result, when you lose
the need for approval, you’ll actually be focused on fixing your life.
Inner Status
You are your mental point of origin. You always come first. You should always
invest into yourself first. To achieve inner status (inner game) you must increase
your personal value. You decide what your values are. You decide what your
priorities are. You decide who gets access to you. You decide what goes in line
with your vision. And of course…
You block out anything that goes against your values. You say no to anything that
goes against your vision. You say no to anything that takes you away from your
priorities. You say no more and more because your vision is so clear. You say no
more not to be an asshole, but because your time is finite. You say no because you
can. Inner status is a concept I coined to be in alignment with the most important
person in this world: YOURSELF. Lets get something straight. You choose
yourself second or even last and you’ll never achieve much in life. You put others
before you and you’ll pay a big price. Your satisfaction and fulfillment in life will
suffer. The most selfless thing you can do is to be selfish. You can’t give if you
don’t have. Inner status comes from seeing life how you want it to unfold. Creating
your reality based off of your values and priorities. Let the world crash and burn
while you achieve your ultimate vision. While you become the ultimate version of
yourself. Because happiness comes from growth and progress. Increasing your
inner status through self importance will be the best decision you ever make. Why?
If not you, then who? And if not now, then when?
Developing Core Confidence
Anyone can be confident in a situation they’re comfortable in or familiar with. But
what about the unpredictabilities of life? What about when you enter a new
environment? What then? You see, in order to be a world bestriding alpha male,
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oozing confidence with two giant titanium balls swinging between his legs no
matter the situation he finds himself in is the entire point of this book. While you
will learn all the foundational concepts in the following pages, core confidence
comes from facing a four letter word everyone intentionally avoids all their life.
What is that four letter word? FEAR. Most avoid fear like a plague because it
doesn’t feel good. Yet, I am here to strongly suggest that in order to have
confidence around women, you must PROACTIVELY face your fears on a daily
basis. How can she trust you if you’re afraid? You currently aren’t as alpha (guys
who get the hottest girls) as you want to be because you don’t have experiences
where you’ve had to exercise that masculinity. Men aren’t afraid of shit. We plow
forward in hopes of achieving our dreams, no matter the cost.
Fearlessness = Confidence
Now, keep in mind that most of today’s fears are all mental. There are no
sabertooth tigers out there that you’ll have to randomly fight because you’re
hunting for food. You don’t even have to hunt for food anymore (although killing
game meat is a very masculine activity) because we live in a society that has
nullified almost all physical danger. Therefore, 99% of modern men are pussies.
Most “men” haven’t been tested by life like our ancestors were where everyday
was a battle for survival. The unforgiving jungle has turned into suburban living.
Evolution has created safety and we can use that to our advantage, but if you seek
too much comfort in todays society, you will be depressed like the rise of
depressed Americans in the western world. Why are they depressed when arguably
they have it all? Because deep down inside they know they should be striving for
more. Deep down inside they have big dreams, but are too afraid to do anything
about them. All delusional mental phobias from a brain that isn’t evolved to live
behind a computer screen all day long.
In my early 20s, I found that by facing my gut wrenching fears, although horrible
emotions like anxiety were present each and every time, my confidence would go
up by 1% the next day. I felt proud of myself for approaching the hottest group of
girls at the club. I felt good about myself for killing black widows when they
scared the shit out of me all my life. I felt powerful AFTER THE FACT that I did
public speaking when everything in my body was telling me to sit back down. The
core confidence you want will slowly build by choosing moments that stretch your
current comfort zones. Face your fears. It’s the surest way to become confident no
matter the situation you find yourself in because you are one of the few who push
past self created limits.
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Act alpha by facing your fears ➔ think you’re alpha ➔ become alpha
Now that we know that facing your fears will increase your confidence, why do it?
Why consciously put yourself in uncomfortable situations? Why feel fear and go
towards it? Because your beta male counterparts who bathe in comfort, live a less
fulfilled life. Because women are attracted to fearlessness. Other men respect it.
And you’ll feel really good knowing that there isn’t much you haven’t seen that
can throw you off your game. You’ll be grounded, un-reactive & at peace with
yourself, which are all qualities that draw people in. While most dudes are
panicking in fear with simple everyday activities like talking to a cashier, making a
sales call or approaching a girl. You’ll be far ahead in life because as your fears get
crushed by facing them dead on, the pleasures in life will be that much sweeter
knowing you have earned them. I have to admit, life is just much better when
you’re alpha.
“No fear. No distractions. The ability to let that which does not matter, truly slide.”
In conclusion, it all starts and ends with your thoughts. To adopt a high status
mentality you must constantly FOCUS on your desires to have any possible chance
at getting them. A crystal clear vision. Cultivating your environments. Thinking
abundantly to have an abundant reality. Building your inner status. Being fearless
in all of your pursuits. And to think of yourself as a god amongst mortals. All
distractions opposing this (and they’re all distractions) must be decapitated and not
allowed to enter your thoughts. Ever. Now that you have the right mental fortitude
required to create your dream life, lets move on…
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Chapter 2
DEFINING YOUR SOCIAL CIRCLE
“99% of the game is knowing what you want.” — Dana White (UFC President)
Most people are not intentional about those they have around them. They give
loyalty to those “closest” to them out of a sense of scarcity. I have always hated the
idea of settling with whoever you have near you as friends, girlfriends &
colleagues because of convenience. It’s pathetic, but the way most relationships
happen is out of convenience. In social psychology this is called propinquity. Now,
propinquity, when used intentionally, is very powerful (more on this later). It
physically puts you around the kind of girls & guys you want while building high
value relationships with them.
To illustrate, in school, you’re more likely to become friends with those you sit
next to in class. At work, you’re more likely to become friends with those your
boss partners you up with. In your dating life, you’re more likely to date girls you
have ACCESS to in default environments.
And it pisses me off that no one ever realizes they have control over this. Never
questioning if there could be better friends, hotter girls or those better suited for
them. Because to get what you want, you need to start asking WHO instead of
HOW. People have what you want. People have all the access you want. People
know your perfect 10 and can introduce you to her. People are the most valuable
entities in your social circle journey to creating your dream life. So doesn’t it make
sense that you DEFINE who these people are?
In this chapter, I am going to show you how to get clear (once again) because
clarity equals motivation. That last part is worth repeating: clarity equals
motivation. I am going to give you personal examples of the quality of people I
wanted around me and the quality of girls I wanted around me. All the way from
looks, characters, personalities, lifestyles, fashion sense, mindsets to careers,
income brackets, status & fame. The work is here. It’s in knowing what YOU want.
Because I can without a doubt, guarantee you aren’t doing this, which is why you
have the unfulfilled life that you currently do.
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We are as sick as our secrets. Keeping your desires to yourself is killing you on the
inside while living an empty life on the outside. How do I know? Because that was
me up until 26 when I finally started telling people what I wanted in life. Which
was to become a coach for the number one dating company for men in the world.
And I did it. Faster than it had ever been done before.
Once I made the decision to start telling everyone about my dreams the right
mentors came out of nowhere to help facilitate my journey. The right people came
out of nowhere to support me. It was something I couldn’t of planned. Besides my
written vision, vision boards & card I had no clue HOW I was going to make any
of this happen. But that didn’t matter. The clarity I had worked so hard to create
was starting to manifest at lightning speeds. It was almost too fast for me at times.
People, opportunities & beautiful women started coming to me as if I was a magnet
for them (more on this later). And I want the same for you so you can realize the
power you have to create once you define that life with excruciating detail.
What Do You Want?
Questions are the answers. And that’s why I started ASKING myself: “what kind
of social circle would I be absolutely fucking excited about having?” So I made a
list. I started writing without judgment. Here are some examples of what I wanted:
The most beautiful women in the world. Multi-Millionaire friends. Access to all of
Vegas nightlife. Mentored by the greats to become their prodigy. Sex on command.
Multiple six figure income. Hundreds of female friends that were models. My life
showing irrefutable displays of status. 10/10 influence, communication & people
skills. Love. Friends that wear designer. Girls that are always dolled up. Friends
with freedom to do whatever they wanted. Collaborating with social media
influencers. Funny friends. Givers. Ambitious circle. Fancy dinners. Loyalty &
trust. Horny girls. Exciting adventures. Transformational relationships. Freedom.
With this much clarity it all became true. These things were finding me in the most
random of times. Now, why these specific things? Because they made me FEEL
GOOD. That’s another secret I learned after being in the most high status social
circles. Everyone at the top focused on their desires that would make them FEEL
GOOD. That’s why most people are incentivized to take action to begin with. The
thoughts of their desires make them FEEL GOOD, therefore they go out and take
action and get results. Whatever you want, check in with yourself and make sure it
actually makes you feel really, really good. This will make things easier to attract
as well. Whereas most people “grind” and force things, you are flowing and
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attracting with little effort. Yes, still work hard and be efficient, but ADD this
element of feeling good when you think about the social circle you want to have.
This is the first time I’ve ever mentioned this “feel good” concept and what better
time than now, in this book.
A few questions to consider answering as soon as possible to create some direction
for yourself. Take a moment to write out the answers with pen and paper. Do this
now before moving on with the rest of the chapter.
What kind of people do want in your life?
What values do they live up to?
What industries are they in?
What socioeconomic status do they have?
What kind of girls do you want to date?
How hot do you want the girls you date to be?
Are you willing to become the type that deserves all of these people in your life?
Law of Association
The most influential people in our lives are the ones we physically surround
ourselves with. Business partners, friends, family, colleagues, mentors, etc. And
this is a law because you quite literally BECOME like those you spend the most
TIME with. One of the puzzles to solving your dream life is to have higher quality
people in it. These are people who are already living the way you only dream of.
And you can intentionally choose them, find ways to add value to them & through
consistently showing up be accepted into the group. Whatever you want, and I
mean whatever that is, there are social circles around that interest. For instance,
photography, internet marketing, porn, rock climbers, e-gamers, modeling
agencies, degenerate partiers, wall street, artists, sky divers, exotic car fanatics.
The fact that you also like what they are doing is a huge commonality which will
create likability & rapport. Learn the industry you want to be a part of, even if it’s
just a hobby, and add value to the leaders, head honchos to enjoy life by doing
what you want to be doing. Most people just settle for the association they grew up
with or are familiar with thinking they are the best they can do. I consciously chose
Vegas, uprooted my whole life there and created a millionaire lifestyle in less than
twelve months. The reason is because I upgraded my law of association. The
quality of people drastically increased, and my life along with it. Penthouses,
mansions, parties with 9s & 10s, friends with nightlife directors, rich people with
expensive tastes, dating strippers, wearing designer all because I changed my
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circle. People is how you’ll get everything you want in life. People are your
greatest assets. Therefore, I encourage you to choose them with precision.
Reciprocity, Always
He who adds the most value has the most power. In social psychology, it is said
that we WANT TO pay back to those who give to us first. Be a giver. You can give
by having a positive vibe where you are fun to be around. You can give potential
business to nightclubs, photographers, business contacts. Key word is potential
because a future projection of value is extremely valuable to the person hearing it.
Invite girls to the next Maxim party. Whether you have access or not is irrelevant.
The emotional value by mentioning Maxim is what she feels. Mentioning future
value builds high levels of rapport with anyone. Male or female. Plus, the fastest
way to not be accepted into any group is to be a leach. No one likes people that
only ask for value in terms of advice or resources. Even if it’s not reciprocated,
always provide value. Give, give, give.
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Chapter 3
SOCIAL INTELLIGENCE
“Self-absorption in all its forms kills empathy, let alone compassion. When we
focus on ourselves, our world contracts as our problems and preoccupations loom
large. But when we focus on others, our world expands. Our own problems drift to
the periphery of the mind and so seem smaller, and we increase our capacity for
connection - or compassionate action.” — Daniel Goleman
Being smooth in social interactions comes from experience in social interactions.
Everyone wants high level game, yet they don’t want to make mistakes. No one
wants to embarrass themselves socially, but if you truly knew how little people
care about you, you’d realize that you can do anything. ANY skill that you learn,
will always be awkward in the beginning to a degree. Reason being because
you’ve NEVER done it before. All of game is set of new behaviors that you’ve
never exercised. Taking up more space, speaking louder, not breaking eye contact
with women, approaching strangers, talking to 10s. Understand this, the first few
times you do anything new, you will suck at it. This is part of the process of
becoming. This is normal. Every master was once a beginner who just kept at it.
The only reason I can write a book about social dynamics, women & high status
networking is because I’ve failed more times than anyone I know. 8 years of infield
experience. Brutal rejections, embarrassing moments, anxiety, imposter syndrome
were but a few emotions I felt learning this. But then I realized that these were
simply the emotions of GROWTH. Everyone wants the lifestyle, without going
through the growing pains. Doesn’t work that way. When an outcome is valuable
enough to you, it’s worth doing badly. Even “naturals” fail a lot. And I have many
natural friends who don’t study game who I’ve seen get rejected when they
advance on a girl. They just laugh and immediately talk to another one, or text their
backups. A true self-amused abundant mentality. Having a high social IQ will come
from personal experience with the right mentorship. You have this guide that you
can read through anytime you’re stuck. A quick read for inspiration, but you still
have to go through the experience yourself. Real learning is doing. Real learning
involves pain, hence why people never learn because they want to avoid the
inevitable pain that’s required to grow. Luckily, you have me to ease that pain. Let
me help you increase your social IQ with the following high level techniques.
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The Spotlight Effect
“The spotlight effect is the phenomenon in which people tend to believe they are
being noticed more than they really are. Being that one is constantly in the center
of one's own world, an accurate evaluation of how much one is noticed by others is
uncommon. The reason for the spotlight effect is the innate tendency to forget that
although one is the center of one's own world, one is not the center of everyone
else's. This tendency is especially prominent when one does something atypical. 1
Research has empirically shown that such drastic over-estimation of one's effect on
others is widely common. Many professionals in social psychology encourage
people to be conscious of the spotlight effect and to allow this phenomenon to
moderate the extent to which one believes one is in a social spotlight. 2
Knowing this will make your life a less anxious experience. If every single human
being has the spotlight effect and they believe others are solely observing THEIR
actions, then who’s actually noticing YOU? Literally no one. I always had a
reckless attitude as a kid, but when I got into game, my actions felt as if they were
magnified in social settings. I felt like everyone was listening to what I was saying
to pick up chicks. I’d still be self-amused and troll girls, but when it came to
socializing in venues filled with strangers I felt somewhat stifled. As
megalomaniacal as I’ve always been, I had to destroy this feeling because it was
holding me back from fully expressing myself when socializing. Maybe you can
relate. So I began to do research. All of what I teach is backed up by behavioral
psychology, social psychology and the dark arts. One day, as I was scrolling
through google, I found this thing called the spotlight effect. A wave of tremendous
freedom came over me because I realized that what I was feeling was egocentrism.
But because the study shows that EVERYONE has this crippling anxiety when in
the presence of others, I felt as though I now had this invisible superpower. No one
cared what I did, because everyone is the center of their own universe with their
own problems. As I implemented this infield I found that people might look over at
me for 5 seconds when I would do something, but then go right back to their own
world. You just aren’t as special as your brain makes you think you are. Talking to
a group of 10s? No one cares. Making a sales call? No one cares. Doing table
game? No one cares. Sharing content of your life on social media? No one cares.
Just do whatever the fuck you want. Now you have proof and permission to make
1 Denton-Mendoza, R. (2012-06-05). “The Spotlight Effect” Psychology Today
2 Gordon, A. M. (2013-11-21). “Have You Fallen Prey to “The Spotlight Effect?”” Psychology Today
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mistakes. No reason to hold yourself back for the rest of your life. Take the risk,
make the jump and hunt down your dreams.
Focus on Others
The most charismatic, charming & influential people in the world focus on how
they make others feel. When in doubt, we focus out. It’s not about me. It’s not
about you. In high value areas, I’m always thinking, “how can I add value here” or
“who can I compliment” or “what problem can I solve here?” Real networking is
building relationship capital, friendship, credibility & utility. It is NOT asking for
resources, advice or compliance of any kind. Tony Robbins said it best during one
of his interviews, “self-obsession causes suffering.” Ignore you’re own selfinterests and acknowledge the self-interests of others. This makes you present and
able to communicate much easier since the other person in front of you is talking
about their favorite subject in the world: themselves.
Calibration
Having good judgement comes from experience and experience comes from
having poor judgement. I’m not sure where I heard that last sentence, but it
definitely rings true. You become skilled through repetition. Consistent effort
applied over a long time. You’ll become calibrated by being uncalibrated. You can
test my 5 Steps to Table Game (see Nightlife Chapter) but your first time will be
off. My 5 steps are fail proof so you will get the table, but the execution might be
sloppy. Who cares? You got the table. You’re at a high value area where you can
bring hot girls to or get introduced to the girls already there. This is where most
guys get hung up with game. They hold themselves back for fear of looking like
fools, yet where do you think my 5 Steps to Table Game came from? From looking
like a fool the first several times I tried learning table game. You now get to go
through your own growth to obtain the same result. Only difference is you have a
roadmap to follow to minimize the embarrassment because I already paid the price
to learn it. This is how civilization improves and continues to get better everyday.
Calibration can only exist AFTER you get real life feedback on what NOT to do.
Granted, that you have the social intelligence to differentiate between what works
and to eliminate what doesn’t.
Positive Emotions
Do whatever it is that you need to do to meet your needs on a daily basis. Take a
shower, wear fresh clothes, get some work done, hit the gym, eat clean food, take
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your vitamins, read this book, hang out with a beautiful girl, give something to
someone that has no way to pay you back, talk to your best friend, watch some
comedy, etc. The reason being because investing in yourself is the greatest
investment you can make. These things will make YOU FEEL GOOD. You are
proactively taking actions that produce good emotions. When you are flooded with
positive emotions, it’s much easier to transfer those emotions to others. You can
just choose to feel good now. You actually don’t even have to do anything, but an
effective strategy is to act your way into a new feeling. This is a universal way of
adding value to millionaires, high status guys, people with access, girls and anyone
you want to connect with.
Never complain about anything. Don’t create negative emotions in others. Don’t
tell people your problems. Get a dog instead. And get a confidant you can vent to.
Everyone else doesn’t need to hear your complaints about life, girls, business deals
that fell through or anything that kills the vibe. You should have all your shit
together because you are a man. The burden of performance is never ending, yet I
see this as an advantage. I have complete control over my life instead of
complaining about how hard the world is. If you are ambitious, prepare to work.
Prepare to get hit harder than ever, while simultaneously experiencing some of the
highest highs in your personal and professional life.
The most machiavelli thing you can do is to be nice. Trying to establish dominance
everywhere you go overtly will just piss people off and get you ostracized from the
circle. When you have value, being nice is a sign of rapport. When you have zero
value, being nice is a sign of neediness. Context matters, but as you’re increasing
your value daily, having a good attitude about life makes you even more valuable.
Treating others with respect, yet tooling them at the same time is appreciated.
Everyone wants to have a good time. You now are the source of that everywhere
you go.
“Your attitude, not your aptitude will determine your altitude.” — Zig Ziglar
The 3 Step Rapport Ladder
1.) No Rapport
Before you know someone there is no rapport. You have to initiate it or as we’ll see
in step 3 you musty be introduced by someone else. Simple.
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2.) 1 on 1 Rapport
This is where you are friends with someone enough to hang out one on one. The
two of you go to the gym, get dinner and do regular day to day activities. But this
same person doesn’t invite you out to high value activities (yet) and you might not
want to invite them to a high value event of yours either.
3.) Introductory Rapport
This is where you want to be. This changed my life once I learned it because it
opened the velvet ropes of life reserved for rockstars and rich guys. What was
behind the velvet ropes? Real 9s and 10s. Pay close attention so you can too can
get access to anything, anywhere, in any city, in any social circle. There are three
key concepts that will get you introduced to anyone you want. I call this fast
tracking rapport which we’ll expand upon next.
Fast Tracking Rapport
Mere Exposure Effect — a psychological phenomenon by which people tend to
develop a preference for things merely because they are familiar with them. In
social psychology, this effect is sometimes called the familiarity principle. In
studies of interpersonal attraction, the more often someone sees a person, the
more pleasing and likeable they find that person. 3
The most obvious application of the mere-exposure effect is in advertising, but
research on its effectiveness at enhancing consumer attitudes toward particular
companies and products has been mixed. One study tested the mere-exposure effect
with banner ads on a computer screen. College-age students were asked to read an
article on the computer while banner ads flashed at the top of the screen. The
results showed that each group exposed to the "test" banner rated the ad more
favorably than other ads shown less frequently or not at all. This research
supports the mere-exposure effect.4
In other words, the more times people see you in real life and on their social media
feeds, the more they’ll like you.
3 Zajonc, R.B. (December 2001). “Mere Exposure: A Gateway to the Subliminal”
4 Fang, Xiang; Singh, Surendra; Ahluwalia, Rohini (2007) “An Examination of Different Explanations for
The Mere Exposure Effect”
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The warm glow effect states that positive stimuli seem more familiar because of
the positive emotions they evoke in us.5
The top level social circle guys do this. We make people feel good around us, and
although you won’t get everyone to like you, a large majority that you otherwise
wouldn’t of gotten on your side, are now into you because of the positive emotions
you’ve made them feel. Be the feel good plug.
Recognition — make others feel important by memorizing something unique
about them. Here is an excerpt that is beautifully explained by my all time favorite
book: How To Win Friends And Influence People…
Six Ways To Make People Like You
1. Become genuinely interested in other people
2. Smile
3. Remember that a person’s name is, to that person, the sweetest and most
important sound in any language
4. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves
5. Talk in terms of the other person’s interests
6. Make the other person feel important — do it sincerely
Similarities — we like people that are like us. This is why choosing a social niche
is important when first starting out so you have enough time to dress like them,
talk like them, act like them, and do what they do so you can get accepted into the
social circle a lot faster than being oblivious to the social dynamics at play.
Fast tracking rapport is a major key in creating relationships because at some point
I realized that I didn’t have the time to connect with people the way most do.
Which is the slow, long way through months of time. That works, but I wanted to
fast forward our relationship to the point that THEY FELT like we had known each
other for months, even years. Mere exposure, recognition & similarities will get
you to those deeper levels of rapport that everyone wants in a genuine way. Now,
lets get into the most controversial technique you can use with women to increase
your social IQ.
5 Corneille, O.; Monin, B.; Pleyers, G. (2004). "Is positivity a cue or a response option? Warm glow vs
evaluative matching in the familiarity for attractive and not-so-attractive faces"
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The Law of Opposites
Introducing Jedi Game. What doesn’t make logical sense is enticing; makes us
want to question and learn more. Therefore, you must drop your logical fallacies as
a male here. This will not make sense at first. With repeated implementation it will
eventually begin to make sense. Think back to the times you were with a girl and
she said, “we’re not having sex tonight” and you actually believed her. (FAIL).
Women do this naturally where they say something but mean something
completely different. To the typical male, this baffles them. Left with question
marks all over their face trying to answer the age old question: “what do women
really want?” You see, in order to get girls, you have to think like them. The hunter
understands its prey more than the prey understands itself. When the girl in the
above example said, “we’re not having sex tonight.” What she really meant was, “I
want to have sex with you, I hope you figure this out so I don’t feel like a slut.”
She’s trying to show you that she’s not easy. She wants you to think she’s valuable
by saying that. No matter how much she likes you and wants to sleep with you,
will girls ever really take responsibility when it comes to initiating sex. Feel free to
use this on women yourself. Next time you’re with a girl try this and tell her,
“we’re not having sex tonight” (with a shit eating grin and genuine delivery) and
watch how she gets stunned by your Jedi level game. “Lol, omg you’re crazyyy!”
And then sex ensues. This is an example of disqualification which breaks rapport
so she then feels the need to regain comfort by sleeping with you.
Whatever you want someone to do, tell them the opposite of that thing. Tell them
why they won’t, why they can’t, and why they’re not good enough to do the thing
you want them to do. This is going to make you more creative when socializing
since you’re accessing the emotional side of your brain. I’m sure you use the
logical side enough, so let it rest and scramble your own reality by telling others to
do the opposite of what you REALLY want them to do.
“You don’t seem ready, I’ll take you home early tonight.”
“I just don’t think you’re able to go home with me tonight.”
“You’re not good enough to hang out with us at the Maxim party.”
“I just don’t think you’d be able to handle a guy like me.”
“You won’t come over.”
“No, don’t call me tonight. Don’t do it.”
“You are not spontaneous are you?”
“You don’t seem like the type to be into Hispanic dudes.” (I’m Hispanic)
“You probably can’t leave work early because you’re boss won’t let you.”
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“You don’t seem independent, you seem to always need permission.”
“You wouldn’t want to ___________.”
What you say doesn’t even have to make sense. All of these cause cognitive
dissonance for her to SOLVE and PROVE YOU WRONG. This kind of game also
carries a small amount of disapproval, depending on delivery. Be light, not serious.
This level of emotional investment is what you want. Allow her to “prove you
wrong.” This level of tension being built up is good. But most guys don’t know
how to build it or avoid it altogether. When they see a woman angry or emotional,
they don’t know how to handle the situation. But theres nothing to handle, just
allow her to get worked up. Enjoy the show. Switch topics casually and let the
tension come back down. Push pull, ebb and flow.
Primary Driver Emotion
Everyone, and I mean everyone has a PDE (primary driver emotion). No matter
how successful, high status or rich they are, there’s this human tendency to always
want what we don’t have. I’ll get straight to the point with this one. The easiest
way to find someones PDE is by asking them two questions.
1.) “If you weren’t doing this (current job) what would you be doing?”
2.) “What’s the most important thing to you in life right now?”
These simple questions will tell you a lot about a person’s values, drivers and
goals. The reason you want to know these things is to connect on a deeper level to
be able to influence them. In other to influence someone, you must first know what
they want in life. The answers to these questions can change in the same person
depending on the time you asked. Many are motivated by not living their dreams,
not making as much money as they’d like, not having an intimate partner, etc. In
other words, they’re motivated to get away from pain. Others are motivated by the
gain of pleasure. A different career that’s more fulfilling, a new car, more women,
house in the hills and a penthouse in Miami, traveling to an exotic destination.
People can be very interesting if you take interest in them. And when you do, your
ability to influence them becomes easy.
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Chapter 4
ATTRACTION GOD
“The quality that causes an interest, desire in, or gravitation to something or someone.”
— Google
Stop trying to learn game and start building an attractive lifestyle. The challenge in
life is self-mastery, not women-mastery, or money-mastery. It’s always you against
you. Therefore, success with women and success with life cannot be chased or
pursued. You must create such an aura where you become a magnet for all of your
desires. Attraction has the words ‘attract’ and ‘action’ within it. The ACTION you
take is geared towards becoming someone girls are ATTRACTED to. Either by
holding power, being insanely charismatic or through raw audacity. The truth is,
you must build a life of status. To illustrate…
The two biggest aphrodisiacs for women are fame and power. All other attraction
techniques trickle down from there. You can achieve both fame (social proof) and
power through many avenues. To name a few: building a successful business,
becoming a music artist, having an indifferent, reckless attitude, being an MMA
fighter, degenerate nightlife host, actor, dictator, having a big following on social
media, being the contextual alpha male in a group. The thing all these things have
in common is that you are positioning yourself to be the center of attention. You
are inspiring people to focus on you. You are building social proof for yourself by
being extremely good at what you do. All while making it seem effortless and as
though you don’t care if anyone is really taking notice. You are so focused on your
life that others are in awe with your actions. Women take notice of these subtleties
that fly over the heads of most men. This is how you get the things you want to
CHASE you. Everyone wants to feel wanted, but in order for you to be wanted by
women, you must BECOME someone worth pursuing.
Increasing your personal value in life involves working towards becoming the
ultimate version of yourself. Mind, body, spirit, pockets. It involves skill building
to the umpteenth degree. In other words, becoming extremely good at a chosen
endeavor where you can shine. Some of you might not want all that attention, but if
you’re really proficient at what you do, others will take notice. On the importance
of being the best at what you do. There will be a lot of obstacles you will have to
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face in life. And if you’re not really trying to give it your all, while you’re alive, in
your chosen endeavors, then what are you really doing any of this for? Don’t half
ass anything. Because both mediocrity and extreme levels of success take the same
amount of energy.
As you’re building an attractive lifestyle, running game from this position is like
shooting fish in a barrel. It’s not game anymore, its just your life. Girls come to
you now with little effort on your end. DMs blowing up. Inbound texts. Girls
asking their friends about you. Shy girls making it easier for you to talk to them.
High end event invites, dinner invites, exclusive party invites. People WANT you
around. Because you are someone that increases the status of those around them.
Put simply, you’re valuable. Only thing you have to do now, to effectively
maneuver through these scenarios is not qualify yourself (more on this later).
This is why social circle game trumps all other methods. Not only does social
circle attract the hottest girls possible, it allows you to focus on yourself while the
quality of your dating options skyrocket. Positioning is a very powerful marketing
technique to attract the right customers. And we use this same concept socially to
position ourselves as the best and only option for all the girls in our social circle
and our social media. Perception of value is better than trying to show actual value.
The former gets you what you want with less effort, while the latter hinges on
looking try hard.
Breaking Rapport
We break rapport, we rarely build it. There is a time to build deep comfort to avoid
the player vibe, but it is not in the beginning stages when meeting a new girl. The
term breaking rapport sounds negative, but its not. A simple way to define it is the
removal of comfort so that she tries to regain footing in the interaction. You build
some comfort by NOT hitting on her, just chatting about where she’s from or what
brings her out to then BREAK this rapport. This begins the attraction phase. This
tension gets her invested as you are the source of these emotions. It’s pathetic to
see a large majority of guys tip toeing around hot girls trying to build rapport and
being nice thinking this is going to get them a shot. Fuck that. We break rapport
with our communication, with our body language, with our fashion, with our
lifestyle (see above). She’s being gamed from multiple channels, not just your
verbals. Yes, build some rapport with her just so you can break it. The essence of
push pull. Most guys only pull when a few slight pushes here and there would
intrigue her to no end. It’s different from all her beta orbiters waiting for an
opportunity at love. To attract her, she must feel tension. You create this tension
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between the two of you by how you live, how you talk, how you carry yourself, the
hobbies you have, your shit eating grin attitude towards life. Remember when I
spoke to you about facing your fears? This is how you’ll naturally create tension
with women because she can’t possibly be any more dangerous than your own
inner demons that you consciously go to war with. The way to know if you’re
breaking rapport correctly is if she laughs or is shocked by your game. The end
result should always be playfulness, never dry logic or seriousness. You have to
give her the emotional rollercoaster she craves — laughter, sadness, shock, anger,
intimacy, jealousy, comfort, tension. These emotions can be hit through many
forms. Let’s dive in to all the different ways you can break rapport to spark
attraction.
Breaking Rapport Types
Disqualifiers — this is where you casually let her know you don’t see her as a
sexual option. She must know at least ONCE in the interaction that you do not
want to sleep with her. Of course you do, but by playfully hinting that she’s not
your type, she will be so flabbergasted that her intrigue will peak. Proceed with
regular game and watch how receptive she now is. Women place a lot of value on
their looks so when you don’t “approve” she’ll begin to show you why you should.
Its weird but it works every time. When you close, prepare for a sexual marathon.
Push Pull — just when she feels like she has you, you push her away. She must
never feel like she completely has you or like she’ll completely lose you. For every
piece of comfort, add two pieces of attraction. Pay attention to what she needs in
the moment as all girls are different. This sparks attraction because hanging out
with you is exciting.
Being Loud — alpha males are completely un-stifled at all times, so naturally they
speak loud no matter what situation they find themselves in. When you’re
comfortable in your own skin you talk loud. This sparks attraction because being
loud is an attractive trait girls love in men. It’s also a big sub-communication that
you don’t give a fuck about others opinions.
Pre-Selection — showcasing that multiple girls are into you has been scientifically
proven to make you more attractive to other women of equal or HIGHER value. It
is the biggest social circle hack to hooking up with 9s & 10s. Google “mate choice
copying” which basically means women save time and energy finding a worthy
guy by selecting one previously picked by other women.
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Social Proof — this again has been proven by psychologists and scientists to be
one of the most powerful ways to attract women. When a lot of people know you
in real life or by having a big following on social media, then women will accept
the herd mentality and rationalize reasons why they should like you too. It’s a
popularity complex in certain venues that increase your value and as a byproduct
your self-esteem & confidence will naturally go up. This is one of the few ways
that you can raise comfort and attraction at the same time.
Challenge — never, ever, make it easy for a girl. A man that has options will
naturally be a difficult to attain for most girls. They like this. Tell her, “prove it”
anytime she says something. Don’t be the guy who’s willing to fuck anything with
a heartbeat.
Teasing — the lost art. Truly being able to tease a girl relentlessly is the key to her
heart. They biologically respond to it. This also shows that you’re a playful guy
who doesn’t take life too seriously while establishing higher value. Think of her as
a 5 year old and act accordingly.
Friend Zoning Her — two things happen when you friend zone a girl first. The
first is that you now have a 9 or 10 as a friend which helps you with pre-selection.
The second is that she now feels comfortable around you, therefore gets interested
in you which at this point, you can hook up or keep her as a friend. Both strong
power moves.
Physical Takeaways — always be willing to walk away. When she says something
you don’t approve of take 10 steps in the other direction as if you were really
leaving, then come back. The vacuum you just created will draw her in and her
face will be priceless. Prepare for giggly laughs.
Hypergamy — set up your life so you are the contextual alpha male of the night,
the table, the party, the event, the photoshoot, the house party, etc. Girls want to
fuck the best, while men want to fuck variety. When you’re the best option (leader)
in the environment, you’ll always get the hottest girls.
Asshole Game — we usually treat lesser beings with a dismissive attitude. It’s
almost a subconscious trigger unless you’re doing charity work. When a girl tells
you that you are being mean to her, she secretly knows you’re higher value than
her. I am not saying to insult her, no, not at all. What I’m saying is to be
dismissive. Be unimpressed by her. Aloof. Check out other girls in front of her.
Make her work for your attention. Be a playful asshole.
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Jealousy Plotlines — this is by far the most powerful emotion you can make a girl
feel. Use it with caution, but still use it. Once you know a girl is into you,
immediately introduce another girl into the conversation. You can have one of your
pivots or boys bring another girl in at your cue. Sway your attention more towards
the new girl IN FRONT OF the first girl. This will guarantee you are never on the
receiving end of a break up. Competition anxiety keeps a girl invested. Warning:
prepare for random blowjobs and sexual marathons after executing this one.
Money — having money is supremely important for 9 & 10 game. Everything I
am showing you in this book is a work around for not being a millionaire yet. I am
not a millionaire yet, but can still get 9s and 10s. Most in my close circle are
millionaires and getting women for them is just flat out easier. An angle you can
work is working towards becoming a millionaire yourself. 10s and millionaires
usually go hand in hand as a longterm mating strategy. If you’re a millionaire can
you still blow it with girls? Absolutely and MOST do. Because they are extremely
bad with confidence around women or they are asses that blow themselves out. If
you want a shortcut to social circle game, then become rich. Just look out for gold
diggers. Having deep pockets is a sign of power and survival value, which women
respond to. As a side note, if you’re ever feeling lazy, there’s always hookers.
Investment
The goal of a conversation is not for you to talk, or for her to talk. It’s for you to to
make her want to talk and for her to want you to talk, even though you won’t. As a
general rule, the less you talk the better. If she says, “I wish I knew more about
you” you’re on the right track. There are three ways to elicit investment from a
girl: time, money and emotions. Time being the top because the more time she
spends with you, the more she’ll rationalize that she must like you. If we could boil
attraction down into one word it would be: investment. When we do things for
others, small favors to big ones, we subconsciously assume we must like them
(cognitive dissonance). Because we would never do anything for someone we
don’t like. So the more she does for you, the more she’ll like you. As a high value
male, she wants to do things for you. Yet, most guys don’t allow that space for her
to enter so she can feel like she’s participating in the relationship. Guys are too
quick to do things for beautiful women. They’re investing themselves too much
which creates the wrong dynamic. Most guys lose power in the relationship and
she notices this early on which makes her attraction plummet. Simp behavior will
never be rewarded so don’t engage in it. Once you sense a spark of attraction
between you two, begin, at once asking for compliance from her. Compliance tests
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are the male version of a shit test. The ideal percentage of investment ratio in a
relationship should be 60% her, 40% you. The one who cares less will always have
more power. This will, paradoxically, keep her happy.
The following are ways to get a girl to invest a lot more than she initially would of
on her own. You ask a qualifying question, she answers. In order to get her to keep
talking you want to add snippets like: “how so?”, “tell me more.”, “why?”
Remember your job is to make her want to talk about herself. The more she talks
about herself, the more she’s investing, the more she’ll like you. Always remember
to reward a long investment segment. Make her feel good for her behavior, but not
too much. Always leave room for her imagination to wonder if she’s winning you
over with her qualities. We will dive deeper on this in the comfort & trust chapter,
but for now understand that in order to attract girls at the highest levels, they must
feel invested in you.
So what determines what women are attracted to?
“Women pursuing short-term mating compared to long-term mating, for example,
increase the importance they place on a man’s physical attractiveness, sex appeal,
muscularity, and extravagant and immediate resource displays (Buss and Schmitt,
1993). Women pursuing long-term mating, in contrast, place greater importance
on resource acquisition potential, such as “has a promising career” and “has
good financial prospects” (Buss and Schmitt, 1993).
The above was said by evolutionary psychologist, Dr. David Buss. His study
perfectly explains what you need to do to get laid whenever you want (short term
mating) and how to get a girlfriend/wife (long term mating).
BONUS:
Four Types of Disqualifiers
I’ve used all of these multiple times. Always say them with a smirk, never with a
serious or logical tone. The end result should be playfulness.
1.) Sexual Disqualifier:
“I’m on my period, don’t get any ideas tonight.”
“I’m a virgin.”
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“I’m on a 30 day celibacy challenge. Tonight is night four so don’t fuck it up.”
“We are officially team abstinence.”
“We have the same skin color (put your arm next to hers) you can be like my little
sister.”
2.) Friend-Zone Disqualifiers:
“You’re kinda cute, but you’re like perfect for my friend zone because at this point
in my life, I’d rather just be friends.”
“You’re my new BFF now. I was looking for a (blonde, brunette or any quality)
best friend like you.”
“I’m glad we are friends because sex complicates things.”
“There is the special place in my life called the “friend-zone” and I’m gonna put
you in there.”
3.) Disqualifying Yourself On A Positive Trait
“You won’t like me because __________ (insert positive quality)
“You won’t like me because I am always around models for work.”
“You won’t like me because I enjoy having sex 3x a day.”
“This will never work between us because __________ (insert positive quality)
“This will never work between us because I am always around women and you
don’t seem like the type to be able to handle a guy like me.”
4.) Disqualifying Her On A Positive Trait
“Too bad your personality isn’t big enough for me.” (pointing at a girls breasts
with big breasts)
“Too bad your butt isn’t big enough to put my cup on.” (to a girl with a big ass)
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Chapter 5
9 & 10 GAME
“In every man's heart there is a secret nerve that answers to the vibrations of beauty.”
— Christopher Morley
So you want access to date the hottest girls in the entire world? Well, luckily I
cracked the code to this and its not what you might think. It’s a discovery I
randomly came to one night as my whole life since I was 23 revolved around
game. After hanging around millionaires, high status people, cocktail waitresses,
modeling companies, bikini contests & exclusive parties I found a commonality
that allowed some guys to hook up with 10s while others died never even knowing
it was possible. It was there hidden in plain sight and now I will be sharing it here
for the first time in history. Why am I giving this knowledge away in my book?
Because according to the law of averages, most of you won’t implement it.
Numbers never lie so I’m assuming one, maybe two of you will actually do this.
And when you do, you can send me a DM on Instagram sharing your massive
success story with a life you never thought could be achievable for the regular guy.
What is this secret that took me seven years to discover? In order to consistently
date the highest quality, most beautiful women in life, you need to work with them.
Many of you just read that last sentence like, “wtf? that’s it?” Yes, young
grasshopper. That’s it. 9s and 10s get paid for their beauty. The industries that have
the hottest women in the world are the following: nightlife cocktail waitresses,
strippers, modeling agencies, sororities, porn stars, webcam. All you need to do is
find a way to be their boss, or simply work with them in one of these industries.
Killing two birds with one stone. You’re making money AND getting access to
beautiful women in your day to day life. When you ask a Playboy Playmate or
Maxim Model how they met their last boyfriend, the answer is always the same.
“Oh, I met him at work through friends.” And what is the number one way most
companies hire employees? Through their own employees network of friends.
She’s met all her ex’s and hookups this way. Through work or through friends
(work related). I can’t believe I’m actually typing this matrix hack out in my book
at 10:28pm on a Friday night, but fuck it. Let’s take a look at a few examples of
guys who get the hottest girls unbeknownst to them, using what social
psychologists call: the propinquity effect.
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Propinquity Effect — in social psychology, propinquity is one of the main factors
leading to interpersonal attraction. It refers to the physical or psychological
proximity between people. Propinquity can mean physical proximity, a kinship
between people, or a similarity in nature between things.
Modeling Agency Owners — the models that work for these guys are the talent
that bring in the revenue. As the owner, he gets paid first then pays out the girls for
THEIR work within the company. He’s the contextual alpha male to all his models.
Directors of Nightlife — these guys are just below the owners of the club, but are
in the action inside the best tables several nights a week. Models of all kinds are
handed to these guys on a silver platter to “be shown a good time” at their venue.
Everyone sees it as networking, but relationships are formed nonetheless.
Charity Event Hosts — there are charity events that 9s and 10s attend for a good
cause, which is the ultimate comfort builder. Whoever the host is at this event is in
the contextual alpha position and gets first pick to all the models that show up.
Strip Club Owners — anytime you’re an owner of a strip club, you’re
automatically the alpha male of the entire group. There are other guys that work
within the club who can be sub-alphas and rake in lots of pussy too, but the owner
is always seen as higher value. All the girls work for him, pay him to work at his
club and through propinquity hook up with the boss.
Nightlife Busboys — these are guys that clean tables at nightclubs. They made the
list because they are partnered with the cocktail waitresses every night the club is
open. A work relationship always has the potential to turn into something more.
Fraternity Bros — in colleges and universities there are leaders of fraternities.
These guys have parties at their frat houses inviting all the sorostitues, I mean
sororities, which grants them access to the hottest girls their school has to offer.
Photographers — I will talk in depth about this in the social media section, but
for now, all I can say is that it is the biggest cheat code in all of game. You don’t
even have to be a good photographer. You just have to have a Nikon, Sony, or
Cannon camera, ask models if they want free photos and slay. The bigger the lens
the hotter the girls (half joke).
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Promoters — guys who get paid to bring quality girls to the club. They are
massively incentivized as their livelihood depends on their ability to get girls
inside the club. Several of them have girls that like going out several times a month
so they end up hooking up. Many times they meet new girls the same day and hook
up with them the same night. Tough job, but worth it if you’re younger.
Bartenders — when you control a giant wall of alcohol you have status in that
area. Your expertise in mixology pays off in many ways besides tips. One of those
ways is working with hot bartender women, cocktail waitresses at a club, the
strippers in the strip club or at a modeling company party.
VIP Hosts — these guys work for a nightclub selling bottle service tables. This job
is one of the few that builds status (attraction) and comfort at the same time as you
have the power to dismiss anyone you don’t deem worthy of coming into your
club. The hottest girls reach out to these guys on IG when wanting to come to party
to hopefully be put at a table. The suits they wear are a symbol of power as well.
Porn Artist — no explanation needed.
Gaming in High Value Areas
As long as you are hunting in areas where 9s and 10s frequent, your chances of
success with that quality of girl dramatically increases. You can have the same
level game you have now, but by the mere fact that you are in a location that has
the most attractive woman, you will by DEFAULT get those girls. Stop gaming in
dive bars or low value venues. All you have to do is upgrade the spots in your city
that have 9s and 10s. I always recommend strip clubs as a solid way to get started
because it will desensitize you to beauty while increasing your verbal game by
leaps and bounds. Strip club game is one of the reasons I got so good, so fast.
Other high value areas such as, nightlife tables, DJ booths, bikini contests,
photoshoots, Maxim parties are some spots that have 9s and 10s. The secret: walk
into these areas, befriend the people there, be social, ask for NOTHING and ask
how everyone knows each other before you start talking to the girls. This goes
hand in hand with what I said in the first chapter about being in environments that
already have high quality girls in them.
Building Your 9 & 10 Social Circle
Women should add value to your life, in more ways than just sex. Most guys only
care about getting pussy because they are in scarcity. As you’re building your
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social circles with beautiful women, you will quickly come to the realization that
getting laid is cool, but have you ever had a good nights sleep knowing you have a
big business meeting tomorrow to potentially get a big pay day? (half joke). With
that being said, there are five categories of girls you will be building towards to
cover all your bases in an abundant reality. Each girl you meet, you must DTR
(define the relationship) and put her into one of these five categories.
1.) Female Friends
2.) Pre-Selection
3.) Pivots
4.) Hook Ups
5.) Main Girl
Female Friends
Introducing The 30 Day Female Friend Zone Challenge. That’s the challenge I
undertook when I first moved to Vegas not knowing anyone, having zero friends
and just having moved to a new city. I met as many 9s and 10s as possible in
nightclubs, strip clubs, bikini contests, modeling agencies, casinos, exclusive
parties using my cold approach skills. I was on a mission to build my female friend
social circle because I was playing the long game. Rome wasn’t built in a day. In
the beginning, I didn’t care if I hooked up with any of them because I knew if I
friend zoned all of them, I was going to be in a powerful position. The more girls
that knew me (social proof) the higher chances of retaining other girls would be. It
also didn’t matter if they wanted to be my friend. I was aggressively adding new
girls to my funnel on Instagram so it didn’t matter if they would stay or leave. I
was putting up the numbers and here’s what would happen. By day 3, I really
connected with one of them, just had natural chemistry. By day 8, another one
really, really liked me. By day 17, girls were starting to introduce me to their
friends, which meant less cold approach for me. My efforts were being multiplied.
By day 26, I had so many girls in my funnel that my abundant mentality became an
abundant reality. And by day 30, I didn’t even know who was who, I had so many
girls in my life, random texts at 2am, invites to penthouse parties, invites to tables,
DMs from girls I met who knows how many days ago. My girl roster went from 0
to 100 real fucking quick. Each and every one of the girls could sense my
indifference when I would speak to them. A man with real options is very
attractive. Never be overt about it, always be covert. So when guys say having
female friends has no value, I disagree. Multi-millionaire friends of mine believe in
buying assets that produce income for them with very little effort. Beautiful
women are assets. One ten is more valuable than a Lamborghini. Two 9s are more
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valuable than a rich guy with no game. So wouldn’t it make sense to get these kind
of girls into your life? The answer is clear.
Pre-Selection
If the most scientifically proven way for a man to be attractive is to have girls
around him, then true players will become social scientists and use this to their
advantage. Now that you have a big list of the most beautiful women in your city,
you can now start sifting through the ones you had natural chemistry with to invite
out to events. Pre-selection are girls that are into you, that go out with you so you
can continue to connect with them, but also to meet other girls in the venues you
find yourself in. Having women in your life is the ultimate hack is an easy way to
look higher value. Arm candy some call it. So make sure you do not go out to meet
women without women. Ah, paradoxes are a beautiful thing. The most alpha
characteristic is a man who doesn’t have to go out and hunt for women. He has the
ability to do that if he wants, but instead leverages his social circle (female friends)
to introduce the hottest women to him.
Pivots
The next category is an interesting one. You have so many real relationships with
models that 3 to 5 of them will be hunting for new blood for you. Just understand
that all women love playing match maker for their friends. They literally love that
shit. Hence, why involving a few of them on your savage sexual conquests will be
much easier than you might have thought. Define the relationship with them by
being more specific with what you want out of them. Initiate this in a playful
manner. Tell her: “You know what would be kinda crazy, but funny?” and as she
gets intrigued by your sly smile, you follow it up with, “you should help me find
my next ex girlfriend” or “you should introduce me to your baddies, but tell them
I’m like the best guy you’ve ever met.” You see how masterful this is? Now, these
models that were once a dream are now introducing you to other models.
Which means less approaching for you, but more success with women. Every guy
should have at least ONE pivot in their social circle building process. You don’t
need to do it solo. Get girls involved in helping you succeed at astronomical levels.
Hook Ups
This is where most guys want to start, but fail miserably because offering value
will always come before the reward. You’re increasing your personal value every
day in health, money, social. You are at a point where you’re female friend social
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circle is maxed out. New girls are being introduced to you on autopilot. You have
the ability to approach a new girl if you wanted to, but you’re too busy bossing up
in life making your dreams come true. I actually challenge you to NOT get laid at
this point. You’re that guy now. Your social media shows irrefutable visual
evidence of the celebrity you’ve become. The popularity complex is instilled in
you so girls hit on you now. Girls make it easy for you to engage with them.
Escalation isn’t initiated by you, although you could, but instead girls are telling
their friends to kiss you, to go in the room. You get to pick from hundreds of girls
whenever, wherever you are. You have achieved sexual abundance because you
played the long game and continue to do so. It was never about one girl for you. It
was about having the best options to choose from. You send a text knowing that on
command you can have a girl over. Your self-esteem is high. Life is good.
Main Girl
There will be many girls that are now going to initiate a relationship with you. A
girl bringing up exclusivity is how nature created inter gender dynamics. Problem
is less than 1% of guys ever reach true abundance and were conditioned to believe
a girlfriend or wife as the ultimate prize. That’s not us though. And if you believe
this, I ask you to question where this belief came from. Never accept someone
else’s world views without doing your own due diligence. Anyways, if you want a
girlfriend FROM THIS POSITION then your spider senses will be on point to
make a correct decision. Your desperation has evaporated so you will know in the
depths of your heart which girl is the best to accompany you on building your
empire. A main girl is extremely valuable because although being a player is fun,
you also need love. Emotional support from a girl who’s there even when you’re
down and out. A girl’s support who is in love with you hits different then that of
your family or your close circle of male friends. The best part is if you DTR early
on with this girl, you can get her to be into other girls, threesomes and get her to
understand that you need variety, but your heart remains with her. Whatever your
deep seated beliefs about the world are, your girl will also believe.
The most difficult part about 9 & 10 game for most guys is simply not knowing
where these girls are. This pervasive issue has been solved throughout this book.
By knowing this information, you’ve now given yourself an opportunity to have
your future girlfriend or wife be a 9 or 10. Marinate on that for a second.
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Chapter 6
COMFORT & TRUST
“Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies.” — Aristotle
To build comfort, the cocky funny persona must be put away and allow your more
sensitive, deeper side to come out. Comfort is made up of two things: trust and
rapport. Trust that you’re not going to do anything horrible or make women think
that you would hurt them. Rapport is where the two of you have some things in
common, some common ground with each other so that the conversation feels nice
and comfortable.
Building comfort is important for a few reasons:
1.) It’s part of her seduction process to feel safe and get aroused
2.) The game is played in comfort, without it, you will not sleep with her
3.) Comfort is the foundation to an emotional connection between you and her
4.) Comfort, rapport, affection and attention are what gets girls aroused for sex
You must be multi-dimensional. You can’t just be an attraction god because
without comfort & trust you will be classified as the player and women will not
want to be with you. As a growing celebrity within your social circles, building
rapport is a sign of relatability. On the other hand, only conveying value without
rapport comes off as weird and like you’re over compensating for a deep seated
insecurity. Balance is key between the ebbs and flows of attraction and comfort.
Each situation requires a different amount of attraction and comfort. Your high
level social skills will enable you to differentiate what is needed no matter the
situation. Put simply, without comfort & trust you will never sleep with any girl. At
some point you have to become real to her. You must create a sense of togetherness
where it’s you and her against the world. Make her feel like the most special girl
out of all the other options you have. She sees that you’re surrounded by tons of
girls, but why is she any different? Why is she special? This is where the emotional
connection phase begins. This section is 80% of the game. Most gurus don’t teach
this, but it’s the most important part of building a real, lasting relationship with a
girl. Yes, this is a major key to closing on a consistent basis as well (end game).
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Comfort and trust is the aspect of game that can take you to advanced levels and
deserves a high degree of importance. Pay close attention to what I’m sharing in
this chapter, because there will come a day where you become “too attractive” and
girls will feel like you’re too good for them. To avoid the negatives of the player
vibe, I’ll show several ways to get her to feel emotionally connected to you. Do not
mistake this as an opportunity to wear your heart on your sleeve and disclose your
life story. First of all, no one cares, especially not her. Plus, over sharing about
yourself, thinking you are emotionally connecting with her, does the exact
opposite. Any attraction she had for you fades and her lust disappears. The game is
played in comfort to MAKE HER FEEL like she’s connecting to you — a high
value male. With this explanation out of the way, lets get into the actionable
processes you’ll be undertaking to ensure success.
How to Build Comfort
1.) Make Your Intentions Positive
Whenever you talk to a girl, your intention needs to be positive, value adding and
win/win. This will ensure that she feels safe around you and will begin to build the
trust ladder in your favor. Only connect with girls you actually find attractive.
2.) Pre-Selection Builds Massive Comfort and Trust
Don’t underestimate the power of pre-selection in building comfort. Pre-selection
is an incredibly powerful way to generate attraction. But what most don’t realize is
that it’s also a great way of generating comfort. One of the best ways to utilize preselection to build comfort is to walk into a club, bar or venue with some girls. By
going into a venue with women, you don’t look single and desperate. Pre-selection
is incredibly powerful in building comfort because women won't feel threatened by
you. They’re thinking, “Oh, this guy already has a girl. It’s okay to talk to him.”
3.) Multiple Locations In A Short Time Frame
By taking her through different locations you distort the amount of time the two of
you think you’ve known each other. Why? Because the two of you are the only
constants as your environments keep changing. When you go through experiences
together, you become closer without really knowing why. So I suggest you take
anyone you want to connect with, through multiple spots in one day/night. The
mall, a restaurant, a specific store, a car ride, your place, her place, etc.
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4.) Commonalities Are King
If you and the girl you’re talking to find something in common with each other,
you’ve got a great chance of having a conversation. When you have something in
common, you have a REASON to stay in touch — that reason is the commonality.
She’s going to want to continue getting closer to you. Essentially, she now feels
comfortable to be intimate with you. Which leads to the both of you feeling
emotionally connected to each other.
Topics to Establish Commonalities
1.) Location (traveling, where she is from)
2.) Career (what she does for work, big part of her life)
3.) Hobbies (what she gets pure enjoyment out of)
4.) Music (favorite artists, genres, festivals)
5.) Movies (favorite actors, genres)
6.) Restaurants (what she loves to eat)
Building Deep Comfort
Never enter this phase with a girl without attraction. If you do, which is most guys’
mistake, you’ll get friend-zoned. You must always keep your eye on the attraction
to comfort scale per girl as they each need a different amount of each. Now, as you
transition into deeper levels of comfort, make sure you make HER FEEL that SHE
earned the right to be there. In other words, even though you disqualified her in the
beginning, she eventually won you over. Reverse the script even though you were
the pursuer all along. As you’re building comfort, constantly make it seem like
you’re hesitant to keep moving things forward, but her insistence is what makes
you give in. Two steps forward, one step back.
I always subtly blame girls for making me like them. Notice the word play. I’ll say,
“you gotta stop whatever you’re doing to me because you’re making me like you.”
In an intimate setting, this is very powerful because I’m making her feel like she’s
winning me over. She’s doing her part by getting me attracted to her which up until
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now, she wasn’t sure of. Never directly tell a girl that you like her. Hint at the fact
that she’s different because you never feel like this with any girl. She must know
and feel that the real her is what’s making you attracted, not her body. For a girl to
sleep with you, she must feel emotionally connected to you, not just physically.
Sharing vulnerabilities serves as a love drug for deep comfort building. Tell her
about how you’ve recently been thinking of taking some risk in life like moving to
a new place or quitting your job and trying something new. Or tell her an
embarrassing story with a funny touch to it. Make her feel as though you’re
opening up to her (though hesitantly) and that she can do the same. Patience. Take
your time. No need to rush to the inevitable if you genuinely connect with her. If
you’re too eager to open up, this will make her feel like you’ve never done this
before and make her feel uncomfortable because you wear your heart on your
sleeve. Be a man of several layers.
When you run vulnerability game — make it short and sweet. Do not over indulge.
I’ll explain more in the qualification chapter, but basically don’t reveal all your
insecurities to her while the two of you are sharing vulnerabilities. The more you
reveal, the less rapport there’ll be. Get her to share more than you. And always use
terms like, “we” or “us” to make it seem like you guys are well connected and only
catching up. Assume deeper levels of comfort to minimize the awkward feeling of
connecting to a new person for the first time.
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Chapter 7
META GAME
“Make your accomplishments seem effortless. Your actions must seem natural and
executed with ease. All the toil and practice that go into them, and also all the
clever tricks, must be concealed.” — Robert Greene
Here we will get into consciously optimizing your sub-communications. You need
to be highly aware of your body language, facial expressions & self-talk. These
things impact your behaviors more than you think. I always find it funny when a
hot girl enters a room and most guys don’t even know that their eyes are wide as if
seeing an endangered species, voice becomes high pitch, while their body spazzes
out violently, sub-communicating their lack of experience with women. The
intention underneath your verbal communication is always felt first. And the most
genuine intention you can have with beautiful women is to connect with them, to
be enthralled by the idea of consuming them. Never, for the rest of your life go into
any interaction with a girl with the idea of “gaming” her. Do you want the girl? Are
you actually attracted to her? Or are you practicing some techniques you’ve seen
online? The former gets you a fulfilled dating life, while the latter makes you look
like a fool. There is absolutely no use in giving you one of my favorite lines like,
“your eyebrows are on fleek” if your unconscious behaviors are off. It’s never the
lines, its the delivery in how you say them. Never say anything to get a reaction or
because you think it’ll work. A solid definition of being alpha is: ACTING through
your own intentions at all times. You’re at the cause, never in reaction to anything.
Because the moment you give your attention to something outside of yourself,
YOU are giving it value. Quick tip: never feel the need to jump and answer every
question you’re asked. Get comfortable with tension by challenging yourself to say
“no” for no reason. The world and women will always try to shit test your
manhood, but remain grounded, un-reactive & at the cause.
“What you do speaks so loudly that I cannot hear what you say.” — Emerson
Be Dominant
To be obeyed, you must know how to command. To know how to command, you
must be comfortable with the more positive aspects of your masculinity. Anger is
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okay when exercised sparingly. If you don’t approve of something say so, but not
to try and establish dominance. Instead say you don’t approve of something
because you actually don’t and because it goes against your values.
Her: “Hey I’m hungry, can we get some food?”
Him: “Ok, where do you want to go?”
Her: “I don’t know, wherever.”
Him: “It’s up to you, I don’t care either.”
Her: “Ok, but can you just choose.”
Him: “Why? Just choose whatever you want.”
And on and on this happens as her vagina loses more and more blood flow. Later
they get home and he asks permission for intimacy like the nice guy he was
conditioned to be as a kid.
Him: “Can we do stuff?”
Her: “I’m tired, I want to go to bed.”
In reality she was just wasn’t turned on. Never be the guy in the above example.
Don’t be the guy who says, “no you choose” when your girl says “your choice.”
Don’t be the guy who asks to have sex. Don’t be the guy who’d be willing to break
a piece off his integrity for a chance at getting laid.
Dominance comes from dominating yourself. It is much easier to command
someone to do something when you’ve been commanding yourself to take action
to do the things you know you should do, even when you didn’t feel like it. You
gain moral authority in life by DOING DIFFICULT THINGS. People can feel this
moral authority, so when you suggest something, they willingly follow. You get to
lead from the front, never from the back. No matter how high your position may be
in the social hierarchy, people will always follow those who lead by example.
Therefore, when it comes to women, you now have days, weeks, months of moral
authority built up. So when its time to command her, you do it with ease and your
words carry weight. Men don’t ask for permission, we ask for forgiveness. Power
is best exercised with subtly. Overtly attempting to control women will cause them
to feel emotional resentment and mistrust towards you. You cannot insist on her
submitting to you, she must want to on her own.
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Be Funny
Being funny starts with having a good sense of humor. You need to be able to
laugh at things yourself, before you can make others laugh at them. I’ve noticed
that a persons sense of humor is based on the amount of comedy they expose
themselves to. For example, the person who watches 5 episodes of family guy a
week will be funnier than the person who only watches 1 episode a week. The
more you surround yourself with absurd randomness, memes and shows that leave
you wondering how can someone come up with such ridiculousness, the more your
world view will be shaped into a humorous one.
Guys who are self-amused have a different way of seeing the world. When I see a
midget, I look at him and laugh. I don’t suppress my natural expression by trying
to avoid that a midget is in the room. Accents are hilarious, women’s intricacies
provide an endless supply of laughter and pranksters prove to world that most can
appreciate a good troll. Life is funny as fuck. Learn to laugh along.
Watch stand up comedy and cartoons the same way you watch lesbian porn. Just
showing people a youtube video of something funny can be very effective in them
seeing you as someone who is funny. The emotions you produce are what matters.
How you do it is irrelevant. If you have the time, practice your deliveries in your
room before presenting them to a group or your social circle. Worst thing you can
do is look like you’re trying to make people laugh. Let it come out of you naturally
by remembering something you saw from all the hilarious content you’ve been
meticulously studying. The same way rappers listen to rap songs and poets ready
poetry, you must watch comedy to be funnier.
Make funny friends as well so you can learn to be more expressive. There are some
of you who are already naturally gifted with the humor gene so keep deploying
your self-amused attitude to get massive amounts of pussy connect with women.
Now, being funny isn’t the end all be all. If you lack dominance and aloofness, but
you’re funny you may come across as a class clown. Expect to make girls laugh,
but not wet. Clowns get laid a lot less than a disgruntled alpha nightclub bouncer.
Comedy makes people think you’re confident because a joke always carries a
potential “risk” with it. Smile confidently, but never laugh at your own jokes.
Benefit of being self-amused is it always breaks down a girls protective shield,
makes you higher value as you don’t take life too seriously and gives you a boost
in dopamine. Ever notice how girls always say, “I want a guy who can make me
laugh” but never “I want a guy who can fuck me good?” It’s more plausible for a
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girl to admit she likes a funny guy rather than a dominant one. Delivery is
everything, so work on it as much as you can.
Be Aloof
The foundation to aloofness lies in ignoring beauty. Men tend to take women
seriously because of their own lack of options. Being aloof simply means NOT
BEING DESPERATE. You can afford to be aloof because you have an unlimited
number of options waiting for you at a moments notice. Even if you DON’T have
any options, you must PRETEND like you do.
A girl must feel attraction for you for this to be effective. If you show an attitude of
disinterest to a girl who doesn’t even like you, she won’t care. If you show an
attitude of disinterest to a girl who already likes you, she’ll wonder why you’re
ignoring her all of a sudden. She will work harder to get your attention, which at
some point you give in to her charm. See how this shows the opposite of the
desperation most guys sub-communicate when talking to a girl?
Aloofness is not an insincere attempt at being disinterested. It is a MASTERFUL
way of showing an uninterested attitude based on the fact that you’ve seen it all,
know it all and know how to handle it all. The world is your playground.
Be Mysterious
For a girl to fall in love with you, she needs to wonder, “what’s he doing right
now?” when she’s not with you and “what’s he thinking about” when she is with
you. In order for girls to find you mysterious you must never reveal everything
about your life in the first couple of dates. She wants to know, but not all at once
with the hopes that her imagination will solve the puzzle that you convey yourself
to be. Bragging or telling a girl everything about yourself is the sign of a worthless
beta core. When a girl asks you a question, especially when it’s a shit test or a
qualifying one, treat it as if you were a god looking down on his servants and
EVADE answering it directly. Pause and calmly change the subject. Don’t look like
you’re trying to hide anything either. Self-amuse at the fact that your game is
getting so tight that you can notice girls incessant need in seeking beta blood.
Keep. Her. Guessing. Always answer vaguely, but not too vaguely. Mystery can
only be created by a combination of a lack of information and a desire for more
information. The name of the game is ambiguousness.
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Chapter 8
CAREER OPTIONS
“Far better is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered
by failure, than to take rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer
much, because they live in the gray twilight that knows not victory nor defeat.”
— Theodore Roosevelt
If you find yourself constantly thinking, “I’m gonna burn this whole fucking
operation to the ground,” chances are you’ll find it very hard to maintain that selfamused charm needed to win over the hearts of women. Hating your job has a soul
killing affect that fucks with your happiness in exchange for a paycheck. I suggest
that you learn to love your job even if you have to force yourself into it. If you
really can’t love your job, I hear you, but consider seeing it as a stepping stone to
other things. Either by going for that next career that excites you or seeing your
current job as a means to an end as you prepare for your next move. Your career
should make you sacrifice for an ideal. Once the basic necessities are met, like
food, shelter, clothing, regular sex, your higher self will want more. And this is
where making a dent in the world, through your work or art comes into play.
The connection between one’s career and inner game is not talked about enough. If
you are in a leadership role, be it in business, in your career or where you are
forced into a more dominant role, alpha qualities will exude from you. If you are in
a less hyper competitive role, like an accountant, an assistant to a boss, the sciences
or where you have been raised to seek job security is where betas are formed. No
diss to the prior example, as I’m sure their jobs provide some form of value, but
understand that if you are in less hyper competitive roles, your attempts with
women will be severely disastrous. How you do one thing, is how you do
everything. I will say that I was hesitant to talk about careers in a dating advice
book, but the connections in personal to professional success are tightly correlated.
Men drawn to business or professional sports are exposed to a hyper mentality
from day one. Every soccer game is an exercise of will; every failure in business
requires relentless persistence to overcome. MMA fighters are more dominant than
engineers. Professional salesman are more dominant than barbers. Rappers are
more dominant than parking lot attendees. Not to say there aren’t exceptions, but
they don’t make the rule.
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This doesn’t mean you need to be in a cutthroat profession to develop inner game.
There is no substitute for pursuing your true passions in life, and nothing more
fulfilling blurring the line between work and play. If you are pursuing a career not
hyper competitive, you must create that desire to succeed within yourself. You can
only catch your dreams if you have a burning desire within to do so.
As we’ve concluded, there are certain careers which destroy beta tendencies more
efficiently than others. These include:
Sports or e-Games — force you to be more competitive
CEO or Coach — more dominant and confident
Salesman and Lawyers — force people skills on you
Poker Player — more aloof and calculative
Rock Star, Porn Artist — fuck a lot
Police Officer — more authoritative
Celebrity — more famous
All of these careers impose a standard of alphaness on you on the outside. And
through external expectations, your inner game catches up later to match your
behaviors which in turn makes you more alpha. A positive upward spiral.
If your job doesn’t serve a greater purpose, you must give it one. The meaning of
life is to give your life meaning. That meaning is whatever you want it to be.
Internal ambition comes from something deeper. A career that’s bigger than
yourself. Life isn’t about you. Life is about creating experiences for others to
benefit from because you were here. Serve the world, but work for no one.
Last thing, in the 9 & 10 Game chapter, I discussed several jobs related to working
with beautiful women. Those are all career options for you as well.
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Chapter 9
QUALIFICATION
“What the superior man seeks is in himself; what the small man seeks is in
others.” — Confucius
When a girl opens herself up to you, the feeling of connection between the two of
you is increasing for HER. When you open up to a girl and share a lot about
yourself, the connection between the two of you is increasing for YOU. This is
why betas love divulging about their life story to people because THEY feel the
connection to the person listening. Girls are disgusted by this behavior. Next time
you are in a group of people talking or when you hear someone talking, notice
WHO they’re talking about. 99% of the time it’s about themselves. And while I
agree with “How to Win Friends and Influence People” that everyones favorite
subject is themselves. I refuse to be one of them. I get people to want to open up to
me. I rarely talk about myself, unless it’s with my best friend of 12 years. I strongly
suggest that you have a confidant or best friend you can vent to. As alpha as you’re
becoming, you still need to talk to someone you can trust. Everyone else in all of
my social circles don’t care or need to know about my personal life.
People have good intentions and might ask, “how have you been” or “what’s new
with you,” but you must see this as their social conditioning to make conversation.
Deep down inside they are thinking about their own problems. Use human nature
to your advantage and get them to open up to you. Probe, really probe them to talk.
When others share their own personal life experiences with you they see you as an
amazing charismatic conversationalist. When you brag, talk about your successes
or boast about yourself, people will be mildly impressed. That is if they haven’t
tuned you out yet. If you were actually as high value as you TALK about, you
wouldn’t need to seek the approval of others because your life is actually good.
Who are you trying to impress and get validation from? Why do guys even do this?
The answer lies in this excerpt from an article I found on PsychCentral:
Humans share an innate drive to connect with others. We’re evolutionarily wired to
crave inclusion. Eons ago, this was linked with our survival; in prehistoric times,
rejection triggered fear. If someone became isolated or was ousted from the group,
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his or her life would be at risk. Because the consequences of being rejected were so
extreme, our brains and behavior adapted to avoid disapproval from others.
In fact, research has shown that social rejection activates many of the same brain
regions involved in physical pain, which helps explains why disapproval stings.
Today, we’re no longer cave people running around trying to spear dinner and
dodge predators. But our aversion to rejection still runs deep.6
This. This right here is the unconscious reason you might be overly explaining
yourself in social interactions. You don’t want to be rejected from the group so you
explain yourself in hopes of acceptance. Qualifying basically means explaining
why you’re good enough for whatever the person, or group you deem higher value,
accepts as good. If someone asks you a question, do you give a long winded
explanation to the point that you dry out the conversational thread with logic? Or
do you do what high status men do: evade and keep it brief as fuck? Relax, calm
down and take your time when talking to a girl. Brevity is the soul of wit.
When you have a growth mindset, constantly investing in yourself and taking
massive action towards your dreams, you don’t have time to explain yourself to
anyone. Go back to the Inner Status section again and reread it if you have to. High
value males are too busy attacking life so when a beautiful model girl asks them a
question that they don’t want to answer, they pause, look her in the eyes, smirk and
give a one word answer then casually change the subject to something external, to
then bring it back to the girl. Doing the opposite is also really effective, which is to
agree and amplify by exaggerating your response. Don Draper from Mad Men said
it perfectly, “If you don’t like what is being said, then change the topic.”
7 Ways to Master Qualification
1.) Drop The Qualifying Mentality Forever
Stop that incessant need to explain yourself. No one cares. Stop trying to get others
to understand why this and why that blah blah blah. The more you TRY to explain
the lower your status is perceived. It’s an authority bias to believe that those that
explain themselves to us are beneath us. Let go of your need for validation.
2.) High Value Guys Never Brag, They Downplay Their Success
6 Melody Wilding, ‘4 Steps to Stop Seeking Approval from Others’, Psych Central, October 3, 2015
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By NOT bragging you come off as humble. Everyone likes a mega successful
person who’s also humble. Arrogance has its time and place, but not all the time.
When you are self-validated you don’t need to brag about your trappings, status or
personal achievements. Your social proof precedes you so people already know
what you’re capable of. And by down playing your success, you come across even
HIGHER status, even MORE successful than what you actually are. I would joke
with girls and tell them that I lived in a cardboard box. They would laugh and be
intrigued on why a guy with tight game would be saying that. When they came
over for the first time I would tell them as we were walking to my door to not
make fun of my cardboard box. As soon as they would walk in, they were stunned
by the $2 million dollar penthouse I lived in with views of the entire strip. Their
gold digger eyes would light up every time. Opposite communication is so fire.
3.) Get Girls To Qualify As Much As Possible To You
With everything I’ve made clear to you about the evils of self-qualifying, can you
start to see why getting girls to qualify to you is immensely powerful? You already
are higher value than most girls, you just need to chill the fuck out so your body
doesn’t have seizures in front of beautiful women. Make them feel nervous. Make
them feel shy around you. Make them feel intimidated by your larger than life aura.
Get girls to try and impress you with qualities that are not based on their looks.
This is how you make them feel special because she now feels like she’s winning
you over. The more she tries to impress you, the better. Give her bits of approval
here and there, but have an unsure attitude about fully liking her. This will make
you a challenge which is extremely attractive to women. Don’t rob her of her
desire to win over a high value male.
4.) Get High Status Guys To Qualify To You
As I was infiltrating social circles that, to be quite honest, I had no business being
in I began to see just how normal everyone is, irrelevant of their success. The more
successful the guy was, the easier it was to get him to talk about himself. These
dudes were thirsty for someone to ask them how they became so successful. It’s
almost as if the more successful you are, the less people care about you or check in
on you. I’d casually bring up their business or line of work and ask a few
qualifying questions like, “how did you get into that industry” or “it must take balls
of steel to do what you do.” In response they would give avalanches of investment
that would overwhelm me. It probably had to do with the fact that I was usually the
youngest in the circle, so being younger than them and me actually showing
genuine interest, I assume it made them feel like this was an opportunity to give
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back and teach someone how it’s done. Either way, I made long lasting connections
with multi-millionaires, directors of nightlife, strip club owners, internet marketing
legends & social media influencers to name a few. Dale Carnegie in his famous
book said, “Talk to someone about themselves and they’ll listen for hours.”
5.) Never Qualify To Girls You Want To Date
If you met a beautiful model girl that was your 10, but as you kept talking to her
she slowly gained an extra 50 pounds right in front of you, would you still feel
attraction for her? No, right? This is exactly how you make a girl feel when you
explain yourself to her. It is the most repulsive trait a guy can have. She’ll ask you
questions to get to know you and you can answer just don’t overly explain or talk
too much. She’s trying to build rapport with you, but she doesn’t want to know
your insecurities. As a matter of fact, she might try to test you by saying she wants
you to open up, not because she wants to connect with you, but because she wants
to fish for beta blood to know if she should save herself for someone more alpha
than you. Now that you’re aware, the next time you start explaining yourself, catch
yourself and cut the thread off immediately. Keep doing this until you recondition
yourself and fully internalize it. Real learning is more about removing bad beta
habits as it is about learning new paradigms.
6.) Body Language Qualification
Never. Ever. Lean. In. That’s it. That’s the paragraph.
7.) Establish Strong Boundaries & Standards
In a social circle, there will be unconscious standards that come about from
hanging out with people over and over. As a leader, you need to know what you
will allow and not allow. Make sure it’s all lighthearted and not military style. The
point of your social circles are to date hotter girls and have badass guys to align
yourself with. The best way to establish boundaries and standards is early on when
you meet someone new. Let’s say you bring two new girls into your social circle,
make it a point while you’re all hanging out to say out loud what you guys are all
about. “In this group we like to fuck around, have fun, talk shit and experience
life’s pleasures” or “we usually don’t let anyone stay who’s boring or is a taker, we
love people who add value.” These are indirect ways of communicating what the
group is about so everyone knows how to behave. I strongly suggest you do this
for your own personal life as well. If someone does something that goes against
your values, pull the person aside, one on one and let them know that you
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appreciate them as a friend, but what they did wasn’t cool. Communicate that you
know they probably didn’t mean to do it on purpose, but let them know how it
made you feel. If they don’t respond well to high level communication like this,
then make a mental note to associate with them less. Allow them to let you know if
they think you’re wrong because you might be over reacting so they see that you’re
also willing to adapt. Every time I’ve done this, days go by and that person and I
become much, much closer. Don’t allow anyone to be a part of your life just
because, they have to earn a place in it. And with social circle skills, you now have
the power to be very selective of who stays and who goes.
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Chapter 10
LOGISTICS
“The line between disorder and order lies in logistics.” — Sun Tzu
The closer you live to the life you want, the faster you’ll achieve it. Osmosis is a
much easier and effective way to learn, rather than doing it on your own. My life
changed from broke, no girls, no connections to millionaire friends, dating models,
hooking up with strippers, having VIP nightlife access, to living in mansions &
penthouses. All in a matter of 6 months. When I moved to sin city, where all the
action was, my dating & social life blew up. And on top of moving to Vegas, I
lived 5 mins away from the strip. Walking distance or a quick Uber. My balcony
view was the entire strip behind Aria and Cosmo. Beautiful views with perfect
logistics to the best malls, designer stores, nightclubs & restaurants.
Every city has a location where it’s flashy, trendy and cunty. This is where the
hottest girls frequent every week. And you need to strongly consider how
important your social life is because to get the results you’re after, you’re going to
have to live as near as possible to all the action. This makes inviting girls over
exponentially easier. You’ll find that girls will be open to coming over when
they’re going down the street. You can make it work if you live 30 mins - 1 hour
away, but why make life difficult on yourself? If you fail to plan, then plan to fail. I
remember many outings having 8-12 girls meeting us at a nightclub to join our
table and booking a room at the casino the club was in for the night. I’d do this for
the logistics from club to my room which would guarantee the opportunity to
close. I say the opportunity to close because you still need to know how to pull
back a group of girls and close (more on this later).
Me: “Did you get invited to the after party?”
Her: “There’s an after party?”
Me: “Ya, your friends are coming, we just wanted to know if you were.”
Her: “Omg they didn’t tell me, but yeah sure where is it?”
Me: “My boy has a shitty penthouse upstairs.”
Her: “Oooh, sounds fun. Here inside Caesars Palace?”
Me: “Ya.”
Her: “Just tell us when you’re leaving and we’ll go with you.”
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This is the power of logistics. It wasn’t even game. It was just convenience. I
structured my life to make it easy for girls to say yes to my requests. And with little
friction, your game comes off as flawless. Safety? Check. And that’s what
determines whether a girl decides to sleep with you. Attraction, yes. But safety is
even more important for her. A problem in your game never happens in the
moment that you’re noticing it. The problem occurred 10 steps ago. There was an
error that you missed. By taking care of your logistics upfront, before even going
out, you handle most of the hurdles that come up for 99% of amateurs in this game.
Reverse engineer your own success by having the right logistics.
Verbal Game Structure
If you ever run out of things to say when talking to girls, allow me to solve this
problem for you and once and for all. The key is to focus on her. Stop trying to be
witty, an amazing story teller or someone who can talk forever. None of those
things mattered the more I got into high status areas. The higher status the social
circle the less game I had to do. Just be normal. Normal is asking her open ended
questions and adding some light breaks in rapport for emotional spikes. You see, in
order to never run out of things to say, you can always fall back on logistical
questions. Don’t see it as a way to screen how DTF she is. Ask logistical questions
to get to know her. Once you go through each of the 6 logistical questions below,
you can always dive deeper on each answer to get her to want to talk even more.
For some reason, guys are afraid to go deep with a girl. You’re connecting with
another human being that doesn’t feel connected to you yet, so by actually showing
interest in her life and what she’s about, she’ll begin to invest which increases both
attraction and comfort. When the subject is herself and you show genuine
enthusiasm for what she’s saying, she’ll talk your ear off. Remember, the goal of a
conversation is not for you to talk, or for her to talk. It’s for you to to make her
want to talk and for her to want you to talk, even though you won’t. The less you
talk, the higher status you come across.
You can steal my flawless verbal game structure below. It works on connecting
with high status guys as well, but in this case, we’re talking about girls. It’s a
simple system you can memorize to come across as genuine. It’s always good to be
prepared with content before to be ready as you’re meeting people every day, week
and for months to come. Side note: if you want to come off genuine, act surprised.
When someone tells you something about themselves, act surprised like, “no way!”
I recommend you exaggerate it a little bit so they can feel the emotion and get
excited by your response to keep talking.
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Logistical Questions
1.) Where are you from?
- Break rapport on her answer
2.) Who are you here with?
- Break rapport on her answer
3.) What part of town do you stay in?
- Break rapport on her answer
4.) What are you doing tomorrow?
- Build rapport on her answer
5.) What brings you out tonight?
- Break rapport on her answer
6.) What are you doing after this?
- Invite to an event, after party or future outing
Optimum Venues
Vegas has a ton of venues to meet women, like nightclubs, strip clubs, beach clubs,
lounges and casinos. ALL of them were good, but there was a few that were great. I
streamlined my life by only going to my favorite ones. I boiled it down to 3
venues. Two nightclubs and one strip club. This is extremely valuable for many
reasons. You want to feel good at the venue you frequently game at so your vibe is
on point. Something about certain environments that just aid you in feeling good. A
major key was that my type (Colombian, Puerto Rican, brown girls) hung out in
these venues or worked in them. That was the main reason I was motivated to lock
down these 3 venues and build massive social proof on the inside. Everyone from
managers, to directors, to cocktail waitresses, to senior VIP hosts, to girl guys, to
bouncers, to janitors, to limo drivers knew me at these venues. I would game solo
on most nights, but was I really alone? No. I had friends that worked at these
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venues that would be excited to me, because every time I showed up, I would be
excited to see THEM. Give what you want in return and you’ll always have what
you want. I had access to dance floor tables every night, drink tickets, skipping
lines, VIP treatment, walking in at 1am without waiting. Imagine you’re me for a
second. With that much access to the best nightlife in the world, what do you think
that would do to my inner game, confidence and state? Cloud 9 every time. Being
human, I’d be having a bad day for whatever reason, but as soon as I got to the
club I had all my friends there which would make all my petty troubles go away.
Female friends excited to see me, jumping on me, hugging me, giving me kisses on
the cheek. Being introduced to new, hotter girls every week made me feel on top of
the world. Just 3 venues. Two clubs and one strip club. Living 5 minutes away
from these 3 venues made pulling on a consistent basis extremely easy because I
had done recon upfront. Every city has venues that draw in the hottest girls. Find
them, build social proof, add value to the staff and reign in jaw dropping amounts
of pussy. Logistics will always trump game.
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Chapter 11
SOCIAL CAPITAL
“It takes many good deeds to build a good reputation, and only one bad one to
lose it.” — Benjamin Franklin
In my early twenties, I felt like a failure. I wanted to be successful, but I just didn’t
know how to do it. I was an average real estate agent. Later, an above average door
to door salesman. I tried two different network marketing companies and failed
because my heart was never really in it. I attempted to do things outside my
comfort zone, but could never really get things to click. In hindsight, I now know
exactly why that was. As a natural introvert, I didn’t have a network of people that
I could share ideas with, collaborate with or learn from. I was always trying to do
things on my own. But the problem was that my paradigm was never upgrading to
facilitate success. Without knowing that I had to upgrade my outlook on life, I was
always stuck in this endless loop of average progress. And it wasn’t until I turned
26 that I came to the conclusion that I should try and change the people around me.
I had read several hundred books by this point as I am a voracious learner, always
seeking answers. A recurring theme I would read in all these mindset, personal
development and success books was: “Tell me who your friends are, and I’ll show
you your future” or “You are the average of the 5 closest people to you” or “You
are a product of your environment.” Social media outlets are cesspools for this
kind of over used quotes. And there’s definitely a reason why.
I don’t remember where it was, but I read a book about the subconscious mind
saying that you cannot change yourself around the same people that you’ve always
been around. Why? Because we want to be consistent with those that know us.
Real change comes from subconscious upgrades. Subconscious upgrades come
from surrounding yourself with people that have what you want. You will
indirectly, through osmosis, adapt to their ways of living, which will in turn give
you the results that you want. The expectations of others are incredibly powerful in
shaping who you are and how you behave around that particular group.
Let’s take a look at why its incredibly difficult for some people to change, and the
solution to said difficulty.
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“In the field of psychology, cognitive dissonance occurs when a person holds two
or more contradictory beliefs, ideas, or values, or participates in an action that
goes against one of these three, and experiences psychological stress because of
that. According to this theory, when two actions or ideas are not psychologically
consistent with each other, people do all in their power to change them until they
become consistent.” 7
The discomfort is triggered by the person's belief clashing with new information
perceived, wherein they try to find a way to resolve the contradiction to reduce
their discomfort.
In A Theory of Cognitive Dissonance (1957), Leon Festinger proposed that human
beings strive for internal psychological consistency to function mentally in the real
world. A person who experiences internal inconsistency tends to become
psychologically uncomfortable and is motivated to reduce the cognitive
dissonance. They tend to make changes to justify the stressful behavior, either by
adding new parts to the cognition causing the psychological dissonance or by
avoiding circumstances and contradictory information likely to increase the
magnitude of the cognitive dissonance.”8
Growth is painful but so is never reaching your potential and living a quiet life of
misery. The concepts I’m showing you at one point were extremely uncomfortable
for me to internalize. But the main reason was because I was adding a new belief to
my old ones instead of completely letting the old ones die and only accepting the
new one. The people that I grew up with, especially my family saw me and
EXPECTED me to remain consistent with how THEY saw me. I was trying to
change my beliefs in the same environment which is why I was experiencing
internal inconsistency which lead to psychological discomfort. I was torn between
two identities until one day I said fuck it and uprooted my entire life to a new city
where NO ONE knew who I was. I finally gave myself a shot at internalizing the
new identity I so desperately wanted. Which identity? The identity of dating 9s &
10s, becoming a millionaire, coaching social circle game & being able to do
whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted with whoever I wanted. In the last three
years, I’ve found that letting go is as important, if not more important than it is to
grind and hustle towards a new future. You won’t change around the same people,
it’s literally impossible. Socrates said, “The secret of change is to focus all of your
energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new.”
7 Festinger, L. (1962). "Cognitive dissonance". Scientific American
8 Festinger, L. (1957). A Theory of Cognitive Dissonance. California: Stanford University Press.
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Investing Into The Right Social Circle
This is why I invest into my relationships the way I’ve been showing you
throughout this book. The new identity I always wanted, became REAL when I
surrounded myself with people who were already living my dream life. I repeat, I
got a new identity by surrounding myself with people who were already living the
way I wanted to be living. You must decide who those people are for you. This
chapter could be a three day talk because it’s that important for people to
understand what it really takes to get what they want. Your social circle shapes
you. Your social circle determines how successful you’ll become. Your social circle
will produce a certain lifestyle. So again, what do you want? And you don’t have to
commit to this social circle for the rest of your life. I understand that humans have
phases in life where they prioritize health, wealth or love depending on where they
are in life. If you’re reading this book, its because you want all three to be at the
highest levels possible. And social circle game can give that to you. Investing time,
money and emotions in the right people, will give that to you.
A caveat that I want to add here. I chose to be very aggressive with who I allowed
to get access to me for this very reason. If someone isn’t in alignment with what I
want, they don’t exist to me. They’re deadweight. I need ALL the energy I can
generate to BUILD THE NEW. I need to use my energy efficiently and someone
who doesn’t see the world the way I do interferes with that. For me, this included
childhood “friends,” family, girlfriends, old contacts and anyone I didn’t see who
fit in my future. I understand that you might not be able to or willing enough to do
this, but if that’s the case, your success will be put on hold until the day you do.
Start by associating less with people that you feel aren’t willing to grow. Start with
the people you know are toxic and have no future. Start by not hanging around
time wasters. This will give you ample time and energy to focus on building your
new future. You will get creative ideas because your judgment isn’t clouded by
small minded people. You can now dream big and start thinking about your vision
to get empowered by the jet fuel needed to accomplish your desires. Exponentially
better to be alone, than to be in bad company.
How To Build Social Capital
People, like banks, have accounts that determine how much value you have in
them. A bank determines it with money, credit & responsibility. People determine it
with values of respect, reliability, reciprocity, value and consideration. Practiced in
the way people talk to and about each other. Pour into your social relationships the
way you would anything that you’d like to see grow. I’m okay asking for
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compliance from my nightlife friends because of how much value I’ve given them.
Free entry, skipping lines, free tables, free drink tickets, taking care of the girls I
bring and having them walk in any friend I introduce them to when I’m not there. I
can ask for favors because I’m always adding to my social accounts which is far
easier long-term, rather than having to pay for everything. Plus, I get more access
to the club as a friend of the staff than I would if I went in as a stranger who was
paying for the experience. Huge lifestyle difference. The easiest way to add to your
social accounts is by solving their PDE (primary driver emotion). You don’t have
to do it for them, you just have to show that you are, first of all interested enough
to even know what it is, and second, to help them achieve it. Google is your friend
here and you can always ask others in your social circle if they know about said
PDE. Let’s say they want to start an online business. Well I’d first find out what
kind of online business. Then, I’d message my internet marketing friends to see
which one could point him in the right direction. Next, make the introduction
through a three way text thread and let the rest take care of itself. At this point, its
in their hands if they make use of that contact. I did my part which will always be
remembered by them. This is a real example of a manager of one of the best clubs
in Vegas. Early on when I first met him, I found his PDE then introduced him to
someone who could help him. I have all kinds of access to that club forever now.
Your Personal Brand (Reputation)
What do you want people to say about you when you’re not around? You, right
now, have a reputation whether you know it or not. The value of your reputation
depends on who you are and the amount of people you have impacted for the
better. Rappers have a life with all the trappings they want because they impact
millions through their music. Tony Robbins has the life that he does because he’s
impacted millions through coaching. Lesser beings have the mediocre life that they
do because their impact is minuscule. The bigger you want to be in life, the bigger
your impact has to be. Impact is, making the lives of others BETTER. Teaching
them something, solving their problems, helping them grow into better people,
supporting your family, giving immense amounts of value with zero expectations.
Your business requires you to solve a problem for your customers through a
product or service. Your family requires you to help solve their individual
problems as best you can. Your girlfriends require you to solve their problem of
receiving the valuable attention of a high status male. Your social circle requires
you to solve the problems that arise for the betterment of the group. You are a
problem solver. Your personal brand should be known for bringing solutions. Don’t
add to the chaos of the world by bringing more problems. Seek them out and solve
them with ease instead. The most alpha male friends I have are always taking care
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of their people. Directly or indirectly. They take pleasure in making sure that
everyone is good. Guess who notices this? Guess who this matters to? Women.
Your utility and problem solving abilities flip the attraction switch in women. Law
of Entropy states that everything in the world is headed towards disorder. You as
man, must embrace putting things in ORDER. That is what brings value to others.
Handling shit in advance or as it comes up. Men who operate like this always get
the hottest girls. This is how your reputation becomes valuable to others. You don’t
need approval from anyone, but a solid reputation must precede you.
The Fastest Way To Succeed
People are the gateways to all the success you want. If you want to succeed fast,
then you need to change the people around you to those that are living the life
you’re after. You do this by solving their problems, increasing sales in their
business or paying for mentorship. That’s it. That’s the secret.
Make Money, Save Money With Social Circle
First of all, people are more valuable than money so never wreck your reputation
for some cash. When money is involved people change. I recommend you do not
do business with friends, family or anyone you care about. It’s not worth putting
your relationship at risk for a couple bucks. I’ve tried business with all these
people and it didn’t work out. I’m sure you can make it work, but the exception
doesn’t make the rule. You’ll see tons of money making opportunities that come up
when your network is growing. Network = networth. With that being said, here is
the number one way to make money with an ever growing social circle.
Value Arbitrage — middle man two contacts for a three way benefit. Affiliate
marketing is when you promote a product or service and earn a commission when
someone purchases it. Here’s a diagram of what that would look like.
Brand ➔ You ➔ Consumer = $
When you build social capital with high quality people, you’ll quickly realize that
they also add value in many ways that you can’t. Many do it with money. They just
take care of the tab, they buy the table, they have the mansion, they already bought
all the resources needed for the exclusive party, etc. You are hanging out with
people that have a spillover resource which is money. Therefore, you save money
because you are in situations that cost thousands to set up, and you’re WANTED
there. You’ll also save money by being friends with the staff at the venues you
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want to attend every week. Free entry, comped dinners, comp tables, discounted
deals plus much more adds up to thousands of dollars a week that you’re not
paying for with money, you paid for it with social capital. I always get asked how I
can afford to live the way I do, so this is my secret. This is how I can “afford” to go
out as much as I want. My friends hook me up because I’ve taken enough interest
in them, EARLY ON, to the point where they feel like they owe me. I have
hundreds of friends like this so you can see how that can add up.
You’re One Connection Away From A Higher Status Life
One mentor changed my life. Because I went ALL IN on that relationship. I gave, I
solved problems and I even moved into the same building after he suggested to do
so because he saw how committed I was. My intention was to connect with him to
learn everything I could, while simultaneously providing immense amounts of
value. I figured out his PDE and I always brought results. I added to my social
capital in his social account everyday. Asking for very little in return because the
association was the real value. The osmosis of being around his lifestyle was what
made change easier for me. Although uncomfortable at times, all the new beliefs I
needed to have to create the life I wanted were downloading the same way
Morpheus did to Neo when he connected the back of his neck to the source of
information. One connection that I ADDED VALUE to. Not one connection that
helped me without anything in return. There was a mutual benefit. I fully
committed myself to this life. There was nothing I wanted more and it was that
insane desire of my vision that made it real in less than six months. Mentor once
told me, “you’re succeeding too fast, you should have taken your time for
longevity, but either way, its great to see you crushing it.” More and more success
kept coming at me. It was really fast at times, but when you know where you’re
going nothing can stop you. 9s & 10s, multiple six-figures, nightlife king, personal
brand on IG blowing up, tattoos, designer clothing and overall a higher status life.
All in less than a year. It’s crazy even typing it out right now, but it really did
happen that way. What an insane three years it has been.
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Chapter 12
VIP NIGHTLIFE ACCESS
“Networking is simply the cultivating of mutually beneficial, give and take, winwin relationships. It works best, however, when emphasizing the “give” part.”
— Bob Burg
They key to getting VIP access inside a nightclub is to be well known. Well known
by who? The staff who have the power to give you VIP access in the first place. It’s
shocking to me how simple this is, yet most guys don’t even attempt to get to know
the staff. Nightlife is the hospitality business. They HAVE TO BE nice to you.
Although, their nice suits, tight corsets and disgruntles attitudes might make you
think otherwise. I get it, the bouncers look like dicks, the VIP Hosts look and act
like douchebags, the cocktail waitresses act like they are god sent and the
bartenders always seem to pick someone else, even after making eye contact with
you. Yet, this is a sector of social circle game almost every guy wants to learn to
navigate themselves in. Average guys go to a club to hit on women. They wait in
long lines to talk to 6s, and the occasional 7. Fuck that. That’s too short sighted.
Think bigger and get the nightclub on your side.
Think about this for a second. If you like someone, and they bring you value via
positive emotions, introductions to potential business or you simply get along with
them and they wanted to come to your club, would you let them in? Or would you
make them wait outside like losers and pay their way in? The former, right? This is
why we befriend the staff at nightclubs. To gain access to a location where your
status increases to be the contextual alpha male at tables & DJ booths.
Behind all the status displays, the staff are normal people just like you and I. Never
be impressed or intimidated by another mans success or fame. What one man can
do, another man can do. Therefore, be normal. Treat everyone like an equal no
matter where they are in the social hierarchy. Janitors and nightclub owners are
both my friends. I see a person, not an object. This allows me to act however I
want when I’m around high profile situations.
I am going to show you some foundational concepts to gain VIP access at any
nightclub you want. Yes, ANY nightclub in the world. I’ve done it in Vegas, LA,
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Miami and my top students have done it in NY, London, Australia, Colombia,
Puerto Rico, Hawaii, Bali, Cabo, Texas, Atlanta, and in any other city you can
think of, that has nightlife. First things first…
Befriending Nightlife Staff
Who are the staff members you want to meet? All of them. You’ll find the key
players that’ll help you on your pussy crushing journey social circle journey by
meeting as many as possible, then letting time sort out the ones you have natural
chemistry with. I recommend to go to the same nightclubs every week, the night of
the week they are open to give yourself opportunities to meet the staff members.
Don’t worry, I’ll name them by job title below to guide you in being able to
differentiate who is who. Clubs are loud and they require 8th degree black belt
ninja techniques to maneuver through.
For each of the following staff, social circle fundamentals still apply. Finding
someones PDE is crucial to starting a relationship with them, nightlife people
included. Let’s begin…
Cocktail Waitresses — these are the girls that serve the tables on the inside. They
are all wearing the same dress so very easy to spot. Add as many as you can to
your social circle, friend zone them, do everything in the 9 & 10 game chapter.
Bouncers — tall, disgruntled looking. Wearing all black suits with ear pieces.
Promoters — in every other city except for Vegas, these are also girl guys.
Girl Guys — also VIP hosts except that they are responsible for bringing a high
volume of hot girls. 8s, 9s and 10s only. Hundreds of them per week. 50+ a night.
VIP Hosts — these guys bring in table buyers as well, are more involved inside
the club and bring in girl groups to sit them at their clients tables. They are wearing
fitted suits with ties, pocket squares and an ear piece. They can hook you up with
comp tables, free entry, skipping lines, walking in your girls before other groups.
Managers — theres two types. Promotions managers & VIP host managers. They
each run their own department. They are always at the club.
Senior Hosts — usually at the podium outside of the club setting up tables for
their clients. These are VIP hosts that have been in the industry for several years.
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They can also hook you up with comp tables, free entry, skipping lines, walking
your girls in before other groups.
Marketing Directors — these guys are at the clubs partying with their clients on
most nights. They have insane access as they work in the marketing department
which is responsible for sales and getting people in the door.
Directors — usually at the club, but these guys are always at DJ booths. A little
harder to get access to, but still possible. Mere exposure will help a lot as the more
they see you, the easier it will be to connect with them.
Owners — rarely at the club, but there’s always an “owners table” that I
recommend you meet him at when you get the chance (see 5 steps above).
Table Game: 5 Steps to Success
1.) Flattery. Find a table of 3-5 guys. Fast track rapport by saying, “bro, you know
who you look like? You look like you own this club!” Get some back and forth
banter in, ask him where he’s from, what brings him out tonight, etc.
2.) Offer him a shot or a drink. He clearly doesn’t need it since he has a table, but
its perceived value because you are trying to give.
3.) Tell him you are “table neighbors” and point to the furthest area of the club.
4.) Ask him, “where the girls at?” Then, ask him what his type is (blonde, brunette,
etc.) then, tell him you have two friends in the club that just walked in, and if you
can introduce them to him.
5.) Finally, go approach two girls that look like his type that he described to you,
invite them to your friends table and walk them over arm in arm.
Boom! You now have access to this table the rest of the night. You value arbitraged
two beautiful girls, a VIP table and put them together. By providing a better
experience for two different parties your status grows in the moment to both. You
look like a boss and now you have three options. One, let the girls you initially
brought to the table keep talking to the table buyer. Two, game the girls you
brought and try to pull them. Three, meet new girls from your table and call them
over for a drink, to hang out and to see if you’re even into them.
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DJ Booths
The section that has the hottest girls in the club is worth learning how to get into. If
you remember in the 9 & 10 game chapter, we discussed gaming in high value
areas. As long as you are hunting in areas where 9s and 10s frequent, your chances
of success with that quality of girl dramatically increases. Same level game you
have now, but if I walked you into the DJ booth with me, you’d have access to the
most beautiful girls in the entire venue. You will either pull one that night, or get
20 Instagrams to follow up with later.
This is why I got exceptionally proficient at DJ booth game. All you have to do is
walk in like you own the fucking place. Hesitation is expensive in business, but
DEADLY in social dynamics. If you act like you belong, with full conviction,
people will move out of the way and just accept your frame. If you’ve been
building social proof like I have been showing you throughout this book, you
should be friends with several bouncers. This is important because there will
always be bouncers at the DJ booth area. If you know them, they’ll let you in. But,
only by acting like you belong. Sub-communications are huge here. If you show
any signs that you don’t belong at the DJ booth, they will not let you in.
Once you get in, immediately start talking to the people there. Always start with
the guys, then move on to the girls to avoid hitting on the wrong girl so you don’t
get kicked out. I’ve seen many guys get removed from high value areas by making
it aggressively obvious that they were hitting on the girls. When it’s appropriate,
say whats up to the DJ as if the two of you were best friends. Now that everyone is
cool with you, get some Instagram stories of you there and run indirect game on
the girls. Make sure as many staff members see you back there so it’s exponentially
easier the next time you want to do get passed security.
Skipping Lines (VIP Table Line)
You will always be able to skip lines as long as you are friends with the guys that
can open the velvet ropes at a nightclub. These are VIP Hosts, bouncers, door guys
and managers. I always text them early in the day before going out.
Me: “Yo NAME, what’s good bro. You working at _______ tonight ?”
Manager: “Yessir. You coming through?”
Me: “Yeah bro, I have 3 girls too. Do you mind if we pop in tonight for a bit ?”
Manager: “Of course bro. Text me when you’re here and I’ll walk you in.”
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Me: “Dope. We’ll be there around midnight. Thanks bro.”
Manager: “You got it.”
When the girls and I arrive at midnight, theres usually a long line. But I text the
manager, he comes out and skips us through the VIP table line. We get ID checked
then he writes us a slip that says, “Hancel + 3 girls. Guests.” I always get this
insane state boost as there are stunners who were waiting in line looking at me like,
“wtf, why is he going in before ME?!” as I walk right passed them. Status makes
women be intrigued by you. The girls I have with me are also stimulated by the
experience. When you get this level of access, feel free to approach the girls you
walked passed if you found them attractive. Extremely receptive when they saw
you go in before them. Always be talking to other girls even when you have girls
already. Keep your game sharp by using every opportunity possible.
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Chapter 13
CRUSHING YOUR CITY
“It’s not what you know, it’s about who you know.”
The quote above is actually missing a key component to make it complete. I’m
sure you’ve heard it tossed around before. It is about who you know, but not so you
can gain value or get access to a higher quality life by mere association. In essence,
it’s about who you can GIVE VALUE TO. This is what real networking is all
about. Paradoxically, by going into a new city with the intention of meeting new
people in order to provide value to them, they will be more than happy to take care
of you. People helping people starts with you helping FIRST. Reciprocity is a
foundational aspect throughout the pages of this book, but it’s worth repeating.
When you’re starting, and you have no social proof or value within the best parts
of your city, you cannot afford to NOT provide value or creatively solve problems
for others. This is how I started when I first moved to Vegas, having zero contacts
to building a gigantic rolodex of beautiful women, high status friends, millionaires
& mega successful people in multiple fields. Success breeds success.
You’re going to want to start thinking like a socialite to really tap into those higher
end social circles. A socialite is someone who’s popular in the cunty industries
within their cities. Cunty meaning trendy. Industries like nightlife, high end
restaurants, exclusive parties/events, modeling agencies, make up artists, hair
stylists, social media influencers, brunch locations and any popular spot that hot
girls go to. That’s the real key to crushing your city — attending the events that the
hottest girls go to so you can get access to these girls in the first place. As you’re
attending these better locations, you’ll learn the insider secrets of how it all works.
By making it a point to become friends with socialites, you will get them to take
you under their wing where they’ll show you the way. Be in the know of what’s
cool in your own city and neighboring cities. The hotter the girls the more you’re
going to want to build social proof within the venues that they attend. By being
around the kind of girls you want in you life, the more opportunities you’ll have to
actually date them. Work on your observational awareness so you can keep your
thumb on the pulse of your cities best attractions.
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How To Start From Scratch In A New City
“Yo, VIP Hancel. If you started a new social circle today, in a new city with very
little money, zero connections and no one knew who you were, what would your 30
day social circle building approach be?”
You can drop me in any city and within 48 hours I can build a social circle from
scratch. From nothing, to something, to everything (credit to Conor McGregor for
that last sentence). It’s not difficult once you understand the foundations this game
requires for massive gains. Here we go…
Pick One Social Niche — this will make the rest of the steps much easier because
in order for you to be a part of a new group, you must learn what they value. You
must know what people want in order to influence them. I’m going out everyday if
the city has events on Monday-Wednesday. If not, I’m still going to daytime spots
to inquire about the city. He who asks questions, receives information. Let’s go
with nightlife in this example, although you can apply this to any of the industries I
mentioned above.
People Collecting — your goal here is to meet as many people as possible based
off of your social niche. At nightclubs, strip clubs, after hour spots, I’d have a top
to bottom approach. I’d meet nightclub owners, managers, hosts, promoters,
bouncers. I’d meet restaurant owners, managers, hosts, bartenders. And everyone
else in between. I’d focus on the people with authority to make my efforts
worthwhile as adding value to these guys is easy since no one really does it. Two
forms of contact: phone numbers and getting them to follow me on IG. Do not
prejudge anyone because anyone can be connected to someone that can change
your life through an introduction.
Face Time — twice a week, if not more, I’d show up in person to these venues to
establish familiarity with facial recognition. In other words, face time in real life. It
takes about two weeks for people to start to recognize you and 30 days for you to
establish yourself as part of the group.
Connector — as I’m meeting as many people as I can, several hundred per week,
I’d look for opportunities to connect two different parties together for mutual
benefit. Hot girls + nightlife table. Photographer + models. Social media marketer
+ potential clients. This has an exponential effect because both parties look at me
as HIGHER value than each individual since I knew both and made the
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connection. If you’re starting out, making intros can be a power move. You don’t
have to know each party that well. Just make sure that the connection makes sense.
Social Media — post 10+ stories on your IG to establish social proof with your
new friends. Tag them so they can repost to their followers to get more exposure.
Run through your new friends’ networks, find out who they’re associated to and
comment on several accounts something relevant and valuable. Respond to
Instagram stories because that’s the most engaging notification people notice.
Reach out to social media influencers. Connect with them by introducing them to
another valuable contact, inviting them to an event or other creative ways
depending on the niche you chose.
Attending Events — I would go to the best venues that city has to offer by asking
the locals where the cool kids go. Locals like Uber drivers, hotel staff and by
asking them who I should be asking as well. Being in quarantine, I’d so some
hashtag research on Instagram (more on this later) to find the best locations. Then
choose the ones I’ll attend based on how hot the girls are. The hotter the girls, the
higher status the guys, the more opportunities to elevate my social proof.
Organizing Events — I want to add this one for you to use as you see fit, but not
one of my personal favorites because I’m too lazy to organize events, and my
priorities are elsewhere. I’d rather bring a ton of value to an existing event. I’d find
event planners, make them my friends and provide value to them directly. Plus, I
am building social proof for myself in advance by being friends with the event
organizers. The night of the event, they’re introducing me to EVERYONE. My
social circle blows up because of leverage. Less effort, more reward.
5 Step System To Build Social Circles In Any Industry
1.) Assume Familiarity
Gregariousness works. But you really have to own it. When you act as if the two of
you have known each other for years, people don’t want to risk forgetting who you
are and making you feel bad. Treat them like your best fucking friend. Be
enthusiastic when you see them by saying, “this fucking guy! Good to see you
again bro!” Assume rapport, don’t be polite and try to build it. When you’re
meeting hundreds of people a week, this will make more sense to you because you
don’t need it to work. You already have contacts in your back pocket and you know
you’re going to meet new ones. True abundance. By FULLY assuming familiarity,
you’ll remove the awkwardness of meeting new people. If they question or don’t
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buy it, double down. “Really bro?! We’re gonna go through this again?! Haha,
this fucking guy! Anyways how you been?” Never backpedal from your frame.
Charm is the ability to insult people without offending them
2.) Add Massive Value
The value you provide will be determined by the context of the social niche you’re
talking to. Strippers value money, status & hypergamy. Models value photoshoots,
brand deals, beautiful locations to take photos in, social media. Restaurant owners
value customers, marketing, optics. Nightclub owners value table buyers, volume
of people in the door, hot girls, marketing, potential business. Event organizers
value spreading the word to their event, high quality digital flyers, brand
sponsorships, great locations like mansions, penthouses, buildings. Pro tip:
everyone values social media exposure. Do you see where I’m going with all these
examples? I am adding specific value to each individual because I’ve figured out
their PDE (primary driver emotion). For example, if someone gives you a pair of
country tickets to an artist that you’ve never heard of, would you see them as
adding value or annoying that they put you in an uncomfortable situation? Because
you don’t want to be rude since they’re giving you a gift, but at the same time you
hate country music. Don’t just bring value because YOU THINK it’s valuable.
Bring value that OTHERS want.
3.) Contact Exchange
You only ever get someones contact because you have a REASON to stay in touch.
A future value proposition will guarantee the contact, because the reward is never a
girls number or IG. The contact is a means to an end. For example, when you’re
building social proof within your favorite restaurant, you now have a reason to stay
in touch with the managers, hosts and any staff there. You’re valuable enough to
them that they’d want to give their contact info to someone they think they’ve
known, but in reality just met. Mind fuck? Yes, this is what high level game looks
like. Make sure you get two forms of contact: phone number and Instagram. Get
them to text you first or to follow you first in front of you. This is huge. Don’t take
their info and walk away like you just won a grammy. Get others invested by
starting the relationship with these small yet, insignificant compliance hoops. Get
used to people doing things for you now. Inspire people to help you. This was
created by someone more prolific than myself and it’s called: The Benjamin
Franklin Effect. Which basically means we take a liking to those we do favors for.
But you have to start small so they don’t feel burdened by your requests. The
compliance ladder starts small and builds up from there.
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4.) Future Projection
Now that you’ve assumed familiarity, added value and sealed the deal with a
contact exchange, next you invite them to a smaller event. A dinner, an outing, a
photoshoot, a charity event or party. Doesn’t matter what it is because they likely
won’t go. But the thought of the invite is what matters. Inclusion is a powerful
motivator for humans. We all want to belong. Make others feel this emotion and
they will move mountains for you.
5.) High Status Exit
Say thanks for everything before you leave and then head out with a strong exit.
“Alright, I gotta get out of here, I have someone waiting for me.” Always being at
the cause. Physically walk away and don’t turn back. If you’ve ever been on the
receiving end of this you know exactly how it feels. You’re left feeling an energetic
pull towards them because of the impact they made by walking away from you.
You can stay and talk if you want to continue the conversation after these 5 steps,
but only if you sense the other person isn’t busy and only if you add a false time
constraint. For example, you can say at the end, “I actually have somewhere to be
in an hour, but before I go…” Don’t drag out conversations just because you don’t
know how to end them. When it’s time to go, say the above example.
Where Do You Imagine Yourself Living?
Last thing I want to mention here. Is the country or city you live in conducive for
the lifestyle you want to be living? Other than a job, do you really have to stay
where you currently live if you have a desire to move? Just some things to think
about as a male since we can technically live anywhere we want. I wanted to live
in a city where I could wake up and be walking distance from the best nightlife,
best restaurants and best shopping malls for logistical ease. Vegas was that city,
next up is LA. Miami, NY, Colombia & Puerto Rico are on the list. More than
anything else, the quality of girls that already live in these cities motivates me to
live there. Why? Because beauty is a core value of mine. Don’t get stuck
somewhere because you didn’t think you could move.
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Chapter 14
END GAME
“Begin with the end in mind.” — Stephen Covey
There’s hundreds of pieces of content out there on closing that I find it a waste of
time to regurgitate what’s already been said. Instead, I will attempt to shine a light
on something that hasn’t been discussed yet. A lesson I learned through osmosis by
hanging around naturals. While partying at penthouses with women and my natural
friends, end game was always a forgone conclusion. I use the term natural to give
you context on the quality of guys I was directly learning from. Guys who were
able to constantly get results with stunners. What’s the secret of naturals?
Here it is: be extremely attracted to the girl and only focus on how good it would
be to have sex with her. That’s all they cared about. And the moment I switched
from “gaming” to setting my intentions to imagining what it would be like to
consume the girl I was extremely attracted to, was when I began to close with less
effort, less thinking and more enjoyment. Women have a very strong desire to be
desired. Psychological studies back this up:
“Marta Meana, a researcher at the University of Nevada, has argued proactively
that the organizing principle of female sexuality is the desire to be desired. In her
view, the delicate, tentative guy who politely thinks about you and asks if this is
okay or that is okay is a guy who may meet the expectations of your gender politics
(treats me as an equal; is respectful of me; communicates with me) and your
parents’ preferences, but he may also put you into a sexual coma—not despite these
qualities, but because of them. Female desire, according to Meana, is activated
when a woman feels overwhelmingly desired, not rationally considered. Female
erotic literature, including all those shades of gray, is built on this fantasy. Sexual
desire in this view does not work according to our expectations and social values.
Desire seeks the path of desire, not the path of righteousness. It thrives not on
social order but on its negation. This is one reason all religions and societies try to
control, contain, limit and re-direct it.9
9
Noam Shpancer, Ph.D. (August 2013) “What Do Women Really Want?” Psychology Today
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Before I create an army of guys that are thinking to themselves, “ok so I just gotta
show her that I really want her and I’ll get her?” The answer is NO. Neediness is
the most repulsive trait any guy can display; non-neediness is the most attractive
trait any guy can display. Always, and I mean always show calibration with
statements of empathy if you go too far. Show your social intelligence by letting
her know you’re aware of how you’re acting if she ever feels uncomfortable by
your advances. Mutual consent is the goal. Check in with her at all times and pull
away every now and then. Never be so eager to make anyone feel uncomfortable.
Slow. The. Fuck. Down.
As I was saying, end game should invite itself in as long as your early/mid-game/
frame is all on point. And this naturally happens when you are viscerally attracted
to the girl you’re talking to. Don’t waste your valuable time and attention on girls
you’re not into because you think she’ll be easier. It’s a paradox. By going for the
girl that turns you on by simply talking to, and really desire her, then that’s the girl
that’ll be quote on quote easier. Why? Because you’re engaging with her willingly,
not forcefully. Your imagination runs wild with the idea of being with her and she’s
wired to sense the level of your desire for her. You can’t fake attraction.
Plausible Deniability
“The ability of people to deny knowledge of or responsibility for any damnable
actions committed by others in an organizational hierarchy because of a lack of
evidence that can confirm their participation, even if they were personally involved
in or at least willfully ignorant of the actions.” 10
Now, for asking her to come over. The first time you meet is generally too soon,
but possible. The second time highly likely. The third, if she’s really worth it, is
when you persist through masculine will because she likely is testing to see how
bad you really want her. The fourth or fifth is when you should consider dropping
her or at least reducing your attention to smaller windows. She is only a potential
prospect now, always invest your time wisely and don’t get clouded with fake
indications that you might have a chance if she’s not complying early on.
Once there is attraction/comfort all she needs is any stupid reason to go home with
you. There needs to be a reason and the dumber the better. I’ve found three niches
myself that are fail proof.
10
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Plausible_deniability
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1.) A pet
2.) A view
3.) Drinks
Notice that every girl requires a different level of calibration to close. Game is
never a one size fits all. I’ll sometimes opt for a more direct type of close, if I feel
that she’s on and ready to speed up intimacy or I’ll play the patient game if need
be. Otherwise those three barely fail me. You notice how most guys’ closes are
50/50 and they’re nervous asking, “so… want to come over?”
Mine go like this:
Me: “Just remembered something…”
Her: “What is it?”
Me: “I have to go home soon and walk my frenchie.”
Her: “YOU HAVE A FRENCHIE?? CAN I COME SEE IT?!”
Me: “Hm I dunno, he’s usually tired at this time” [never make it too easy for a girl
or like you were planning that]
To sub-communicate that it’s just an “excuse,” aka plausible deniability, your
reason must be stupid. Then we proceed to go to my place with the intention of not
letting her stay long. I don’t need to ask her directly, they will ask themselves if
they want to. If a girl wants to fuck you, she’ll find a way to fuck you.
Bonus tip: verbally agree, physically disagree. She says “I don’t want to have sex”
You reply, “Me neither, I don’t have sex with girls I’m not in love with.” Then you
both have sex anyways. For some reason after she hears this from you, escalation
becomes 5x easier. I’ve gotten laid more often by saying “I don’t want to have sex”
than by saying, “I want to have sex.” Disqualification trumps logic.
Escalation
“Don’t think, just do”
The main premise of escalation is increased compliance testing. Compliance tests
are the male version of shit tests, small requests that you make that she will
hopefully go along with. The idea is based off of two principles. First, it’s easier to
make someone agree to a larger request if they’ve already said yes to a smaller one
(or series of smaller ones). This is the foundation to increasing a girls investment in
you, the more she does for you, the more attracted she becomes to you. We tend to
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place an irrational amount of value on things we have invested in, whether that
investment was with time, money or emotions. Second, if she does something for
you, her mind rationalizes that she must like you. Taking advantage of cognitive
biases is the foundation for most sales techniques, and equally applies to game.
There is a name to this psychological effect that escapes my mind right now, but it
basically states that people are more inclined to do something when they are
physically swayed in its direction.
So in the context of a social circle event, this might play out as:
1.) “You mind holding this for me”
2.) “Watch my stuff for a minute”
3.) “Come to the afterparty with me”
The key is starting with something small, so innocuous that she doesn’t even notice
it. Then, each request gets a bit heavier than the last one. You’ll notice that beta
game takes the opposite approach. By doing more and more for a girl, YOUR
investment in her increases, but NOT her investment in you. Start getting used the
idea that people should do things for you. This is what I meant in the preface when
I mentioned that this book is about LEVERAGE. By letting others do small things
for you here and there, they will feel more connected to you, therefore increasing
your value in their eyes.
It’s important to ALWAYS be escalating because rejection is not your enemy —
falling into sexual depression is your enemy. Spending six months chasing a girl
only to realize she kept going back to her ex-boyfriend or gave you hopes to only
then see you as a friend is the enemy. Being “rejected” by a girl lets you learn from
your mistakes to move on quickly. Never see failures as something that affects
your value, use them only as learning experiences. Not escalating on a girl and
spending an hour talking to her accomplishes nothing. Always be escalating to
keep yourself out of the friend zone.
Physical Escalation
The moment you meet a new girl, she must feel comfortable with the idea of a
physical touch from you. Ideally, this starts the moment you say hi, by lightly
touching her forearm or shoulder. Nothing longer than a second or two, but later
when you’re in deep comfort with her, let your physical touch linger. Touch and
touch often. All people want physical comfort from others, we’re just repulsed
when it comes from lesser beings. Be the high value guy in your social circles that
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is physically expressive with EVERYONE. Both guys and girls. Sit next to your
friends and lightly touch thighs and shoulders. When talking to a girl always add
physical touches to your question marks or exclamation points in your
communication. To illustrate…
Me: “What’s your nationality?” (touch on the forearm)
Her: “Colombian, you?”
Me: “No way!” (touch her shoulder)
Her: “Yeah I am! Lol”
Me: “Is it true what they say about girls from Colombia?” (smirk)
Her: “What do they say?” (intrigued beyond measure)
Me: “That’s exactly what a girl from Colombia would say!” (grab both shoulders
then pull away)
And on and on, but you get the point. Hand holding is the easiest way to tell if a
girl is ready to be kissed or isolated. If she’s okay with holding your hand, she’s
ready for da cock a kiss. Always try to escalate as far as possible, whenever
possible. The more investment you can get from a girl, the more willing she will be
to reciprocate your future advances. Escalation is based on moving two steps
forward, one step backward, constantly. If you’ve been making out for a while,
randomly stop and look into the distance as if you just remembered something.
Immerse yourself as much as possible into the entire escalation process. If you’ve
gotten this far, you don’t need this book or any content explaining “escalation,” or
“how to close.” Once you break into intimacy, you should pretty much be on autopilot. You need to trust your pre-programming as a man and shut off the feminine
chatter from the other parts of your brain. Remember to match escalation with
comfort and never make her feel like she’s a smash and dash. Although, you’re
escalating as fast as possible, keep comfort as high as possible. Never sacrifice
comfort in hopes of closing faster.
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Chapter 15
LIFESTYLE
“Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of
thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not
to follow your heart.” — Steve Jobs
This is where it all comes together. It all leads up to this thing we call lifestyle.
What exact style do you want your life to be made up of? Only you can answer that
question because you are unique and there is literally no one in the world like you.
You are one of one. Therefore, your dreams and desires are going to be manifested
in a way that has never existed before. Sure, you can look at someone else’s life to
get inspired, but even if you wanted their exact life, the results you produce would
be different from theirs. One of my favorite sayings is: imitation is suicide. Plus,
attempting to only create what someone else has is a disservice to yourself because
you could potentially create something bigger and better than them. Your limits are
only those that you give to yourself.
When I followed my heart to create this high status life with beautiful women,
millionaire friends and full fledged freedom, it ended working out better than what
I had planned, in my limited world view at the time. There is something magical
that happens when you FULLY commit to something that is quite unexplainable.
This quote by William Hutchinson Murray sums it up perfectly:
“Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always
ineffectiveness. Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one
elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans:
that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too. All
sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred.
A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one's favor all
manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no
man could have dreamt would have come his way. I have learned a deep respect
for one of Goethe's couplets: Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it.
Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it!”
I made a decision to commit to creating my dream life at any cost exactly three
years ago. Thanks to that decision, today my life is far ahead of most of my peers
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and definitely ahead of my prior self. I am thankful for where I am and excited by
my future potential at the same time. I went ALL IN on my dreams. I burned the
boats so to speak and put myself in a situation where if I didn’t succeed, I was
going to be fucked. I always say: you’re either all in or all out. My back being
against the wall made me perform at levels I didn’t even know I had within me. It
was do or die. Sounds dramatic, but I was at a point in my life where the pain of
staying the same was far greater than the pain of change. No one outworked me
that I met during the last three years except my mentors, which is why they were
my mentors. They had the results I wanted and I just recreated their successes in
my own way. I submitted to the systems and far superseded my own expectations. I
am telling you this not to brag or impress you, but to impress upon you that
without commitment to a vision that is compelling enough, you will NEVER be
successful in anything you do. Winning has a price, and very few are willing to pay
that price. Yet, they pay a different kind of price by not going for their dreams.
Misery, anxiety, depression, loneliness, apathy, boredom, sexless life, dating
average 6s, overweight, settling and worst of all, trading their time for money.
Fuck. Dat. Shit.
I wanted to do whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted, with whomever I wanted at
all times. I wanted real freedom and all I had to give in exchange for it was
everything. I gave all, but I also received a million times back in rewards and
pleasure that I wasn’t even aware I could feel. My relationships are some of my
most valuable assets that I have today. People that would do anything for me and
vice versa. Multi-millionaires. 9s and 10s. The game to get anything I want. And
internal satisfaction knowing I was responsible for creating it all. There are a lot of
people to thank for being where I am today. But none of them would of been able
to help me if I didn’t decide to grow the fuck up. It starts and ends with you. It’s
not about conquering others. The greatest power in this world is to master the man
in the mirror. Every. Single. Day. For as long as you live. But you cannot make
quality decisions day in and day out without a compelling future in mind. You need
to know where you’re going in order to be able to say, “no” to most things because
you have real priorities to handle now. You’re optimizing your health, running a
business, working on a career, crushing 9 & 10 game, gifting the world with your
presence and making a strong impact in all of the lives that you meet throughout
your life. Fuck, I’m fired up just writing about this. It’s taking life, that can be a
bitch and making her submit to your god like persona. You are a creator and you
have abilities that I’m sure you’ve never even tapped into. Why? There hasn’t been
a strong enough reason to. Wake up! Your time is NOW. During this pandemic in
2020, shake off the rust and start attacking life. Be at the cause. Because if not
NOW, when? And if not YOU, who?
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Did you know that it takes the same amount of energy to be mega successful as it
does to live in mediocrity? The same fucking amount of energy. Everything has a
price. There is no such thing as something for nothing, so I implore you to find that
thing you’d be willing to sacrifice everything for and submit yourself to it. Its
yours the moment that burning desire inside of you burns deep. Vision precedes
massive action so what life STYLE do you want to be living? Once you have an
inkling towards what it looks like, stop for no one to achieve it.
I laid it all out on this book on how to get 9s and 10s the easy way. Just follow
biology, nature and universal laws and you’ll be fine. There’s some changes you
will get to make that will only benefit your future self. The best day to have started
was a year ago, the next best day is today.
As for me, Vegas is the end of a chapter, but life isn’t over. I have a world to
conquer, quality pussy to fuck women to meet and continue fighting for the
number one core value in my life: freedom.
One last thing I wanted to add before we wrap this chapter up. You’re going to
want to read this last piece because the amount of gold in such a simple theory is
worth looking into to extract even more value for yourself. I call it…
The Rule of 5
“Circle got smaller, vision got larger”
You only really need five high status male friends & five beautiful girls that your
sleeping with to really live a fulfilled life. In social circle game, I always preach
about abundance and having a ton of options to eventually get to the rule of 5 that
will make you feel on top of the world. The reason you’re meeting so many hot
girls and cool guys at high end events is to filter the best ones that fit your lifestyle,
match your energy & give you internal happiness.
That’s the point of all of this. To get you to insane quality through quantity. I found
my five high status male friends and five stunners through meeting hundreds of
people. These relationships manifested naturally. Millionaire friends and regular
sex with 10s. It only took me about six months of consistent massive action to
make it happen. What more can a man ask for in his mission to conquer the world?
Your five and five need you, the same way that you need them.
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Chapter 16
REAL LIFE EXEMPLARS
“If you're going to have a story, have a big story, or none at all.” — J. Campbell
It was another night out. Day 28 of what would become 120 nights of going out
straight. Coaching, building my own social circles & dating some of the most
beautiful women I had ever met. It was a warm summer night at XS. Diplo was
crushing the DJ booth on a nightswim — a pool party at night with hundreds of
girls half naked. I was coaching infield approaching girls for students as I walk by
a table filled with beautiful girls and ONE guy standing at the front. We’ll call him
Archer for our purposes of this story. I said to myself, “who the fuck is that guy? I
have to meet him.” So I approach him with a compliment opener and a bro hug.
Me: “Yo what’s good bro that’s a dope flannel.”
Archer: “Thanks.”
Me: “Where did you get it, I was looking for one just like that.”
Archer: “H&M bro, they have other colors too.”
Me: “Fire. Thanks, I gotta head out, I’ll see you around.”
Archer: “See you later.”
Pro tip: men respond well to flattery more than women do. I made a mental note to
attempt to recreate that bottle service table situation I had just seen. 17 girls, 1 guy.
I didn’t think much of it, but I always made it a point to meet guys that had the
results I was after. I didn’t have much in the beginning of my high status journey,
but emotional value is very well received by people. A compliment, a good vibe
and not asking for shit. A week goes by. It’s a Sunday nightswim at XS again. As I
was walking in I see Archer again. This time he was walking with two stunners in
the outside area of the club so I approached him again.
Me: “Yo Archer, good to see you again bro!”
Archer: “Hey what’s up. Do we know each other?” (confused look)
Me: “Ya bro you were just lit AF that night haha, you don’t remember?”
(I was completely making this up, assuming familiarity fast tracks rapport)
Archer: “Haha I probably was lit, but ya, where you at tonight?”
(I was confused by that question. I’m here. Right in front of you)
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Me: “What do you mean?”
(This was nightlife lingo for: where’s your table. I made a written note it in my
phone when he wasn’t looking.)
Archer: “Where’s your table at?”
Me: “Oh, it’s over there somewhere.”
Archer: “Cool man, I gotta go but heres my business card. I’m a girl guy at
Hakkasan Nightclub. If you ever need anything just text me.”
Me: “Ok dope. Here, I’ll text you right now so you know it’s me.”
Archer: “Ok yeah let’s do it.”
This is the initial text I always send to a new contact right in front of them.
To men:
“Hey NAME - good meeting you bro and appreciate the hospitality!
We gotta stay in touch.
— Your Name”
To women:
“Hey NAME - good meeting you and appreciate our new friendship!
We gotta stay in touch.
— Your Name”
ADVANCED Version:
Ask a girl for her phone, put your contact in as something memorable. I always put
“Hancel Papi” and then text yourself from her phone something like:
“Omg I’ve missed you so much. Can you please give me a chance to be with you?”
“Why are you so sexy? Can we hangout later?”
“Can I come over tonight daddy?”
HUGE breaking rapport that sets the frame between you and her. Girls love it.
Where were we? Oh yeah, back to Archer. Another week goes by and I see him at
Sunday nightswim again.This is the power of going to the same venues every week
to remove decision fatigue, but also to build social proof and run into the kind of
people you want in your social circles. This time he had TWO tables next to each
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other with 25 girls. This guy was a G. I was overwhelmed with the amount value
he had so I tell him that I was going to the bar to get a drink. I asked if he wanted
anything. He said, “nah I’m good bro. We have bottles here at the tables.” At this
point I wasn’t used to table etiquette so I didn’t want to take a drink or didn’t I
could (calibration). So I asked him what his favorite drink was. “Pineapple vodka,”
he said. So I went to get myself and drink and his pineapple vodka at the bar. $50
dollars later I got the drinks. I was so broke at this point in my life, but I was after
the lifestyle and this was a high value guy that I wanted to connect with. Plus,
reciprocity always works so that was my intention behind buying the drink for him.
I come back and hand him his favorite drink, cheer him and he was so appreciative
of the drink that he invited me to stay at his two tables with all those girls. It ended
up being one of the best nights of my life. The association to him increased my
value. As a result, I hooked up with a a Latina that night, had many other girls to
follow up with and made a new, nightlife industry high status friend.
I go on to find out that this guy was the #1 Girl Guy in all of Las Vegas. A Girl Guy
is a VIP Host that gets paid by the club to bring the HOTTEST, most beautiful
girls. It’s not as easy as it sounds. He has to bring volume and quality at the same
time. The club judges how hot they are and if they don’t bring in 8s, 9s or 10s they
lose their job. Sounds superficial, I know. But that’s how the nightlife industry
works. Hot girls, big bottle spenders. Every city has girl guys. In cities outside of
Vegas, they’re called promoters or model recruiters. I highly suggest you meet as
many of these guys in your city because they will catapult your social circle
success with women to an exponential degree. We leverage people, remember?
The following days went by and I get a text from “Archer Girl Guy HK.” I open it
and he basically asked me if wanted a table at Hakkasan that night. I was so new to
this nightlife world that I didn’t know if he meant buy a table or get a comp table. I
text him back: “Sure bro, what do you need?” I’ve conditioned my mine to always
provide value. He replied: “just bring 5 or 6 girls with you and I’ll take care of you
with a comp table.” Wow. I was being offered a free $2,000 table at one of the best
clubs in Vegas. I was hyped! I text him back, “sounds good bro, I’ll see you there.”
We handled logistics back and forth, but now I had to come up with the girls. I had
been going out so much at this point that my cold approach was stealth. For the
most part I would get girls walking to the club to join my tables. Status always
wins. I also had female friends that I could invite out.
We get to the MGM casino where Hakkasan was inside of. It was me and 5 girls. I
felt like a fucking boss. I text Archer we were walking up. He sees me and calls me
up to the front of the line. There were hundreds of people waiting outside to get in.
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And this is where I really understood, first hand what it means to have social proof
within environments where you know the staff or people with access. He asks me
how many girls I got, I tell him 5. He gets his co-worker to write me a slip (I made
a note to get this bouncers name and put it in my notes) and they open the velvet
ropes. The girls and I walk past that huge line with ease and get escorted to the
front of the club. The girls that came out with me that night just looked at me with
BIG eyes at the level of access I had. I played it cool. We get searched and ID
check by security before walking in. Archer is with us chatting about random shit
the whole time. We were cleared by security and Archer walks us into Hakkasan.
Two bottles, three chasers, a big container of ice and all my girls propped up on the
arm rests of the couch. Cocktail waitress gets introduced to me by Archer, he says
have a good time and to text him if I needed anything else. Table game secured.
Archer and I became really good friends. He hooked me up with so many girls. He
started inviting me out to scenarios that I could never of put together on my own.
You don’t know what you don’t know. Dance floor tables, strip clubs, comp
dinners with girls, exclusive parties and the Playboy Penthouse at the Palms. The
last one really upgraded my paradigm forever. I’ve never been the same since as it
was a night of rapid growth. It felt like I leaped frogged into a new reality and my
old paradigms died. I had just wrapped up a coaching night at Omnia Nightclub
and was heading home. It was 2am. Archer texts me. “Yo wya.” I was so tired, but
in the beginning of a new relationship you always want to make it a point to show
up to all invitations. Even if its just for 10 minutes. Wy? Because the moment you
don’t show up, that person will unconsciously notice this and probably won’t invite
you out to the next event. Building relationships requires energy and putting the
person you want to connect with as a priority. This will be reciprocated later, but it
has to come from you first.
Me: “Yo I just left Caesars. What’s good?”
Archer: “Come to the Palms. We have the Playboy Penthouse for the night.”
(At this point my reality was shook. Playboy meant hot girls. Penthouse…)
Me: “Sick. You need me to bring anything?”
Archer: “Nah. Just hurry over.”
Me: “Omw.”
He texts me the tower and room number. I head into the elevator, still tired but
nervous about what I was about to encounter. Anyways, I walk up to the room. A
guy answers. “Who are you?” I tell him, “Archer told me to show you this text.”
Door guy looks at it and let’s me in. The entrance was an L shaped hallway. It felt
like an eternity. As soon as we get to the main room, I see Archer in the back by the
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infinity pool. Surrounded by stunners, all in neon colored bikinis. “How the fuck
do I get myself into these situations that I don’t belong in?” I thought to myself.
My vision was coming to life so fast at times, it felt like it wasn’t even me. All the
things I put on my vision board I got. All I had to do was be open to receiving all
the blessings and grab them when they showed up.
The ratio was 7 maybe 8 girls for every guy. It was an after party, but not many
guys. I didn’t ask questions, I just socialized with everyone and didn’t overstep my
boundaries. Girls were talking to me on the couch, by the pool and being super
nice to me. I could tell a few them liked me off the bat. We just clicked. I was
meeting more girls than I could remember. I had a few them follow me on
Instagram. Archer was partying with 4 girls surrounding him, looking over with a
smirk. The other girls were just chilling. It was paradise to me. This one Asian ting
ended up really showing me IOIs (indicators of interest). So I locked in with her.
Beautiful Philippino 9. I ended up asking her if she had seen the whole place yet.
She hadn’t. So I told her I’d give her a tour of the place, show her around. Keep in
mind that I hadn’t seen the whole place either so I was mostly doing it for myself.
But I was also curious if I could find a place to close (see end game chapter). She
smiled and said okay. When you have attraction, investment and comfort, girls will
make it easier for you to lead them to the inevitable outcome the both of you want.
I take her hand and show her the bar area, then walk to the other side of this
gigantic living room and show her the TV setup. Next I show her the bathroom.
Bro, I’m making this “tour” up as I go, but this is what literally happened. Then, I
take her to the hallway with the rooms. I show her what seemed to be the master
bedroom since the bathroom had a big tub in it. Then we go to the other rooms, but
I made a mental note because the master bedroom was empty. So I tell her I forgot
to show her something in this room (the master) and show her the view since we
were 50 some stories high. I close the door behind me as we walk in. She tells me,
“You’re smart, is this what you do with all the girls? You give them a tour of your
place,” as she smiled. I played it off like I didn’t know what she was talking about
and go in to kiss her. She was one of the most incredible girls I had ever been with.
A Playboy model in Vegas all because I was at the right place (logistics), at the
right time and because of Archer. Get yourself an Archer or be like Archer.
Model House 10
It had only been four months into living in Vegas when I got the call. I was invited
to house sit for a mentor who owned a mansion. This was easily a million dollar
home. And looking back, I was hesitant at first. Subconscious programs that were
trying to hold me back, but my vision was too compelling. It took me about two
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weeks to decide if I wanted to live rent free in a mansion. All I had to do was take
care of it and keep it clean. I called my mentor and made the jump. Rarely are we
ever ready to go to the next level. But that’s how you get ready, by making the
leap. Funny how the world works because about a week after I had moved in, my
mentor calls me telling me that a friend of his was going to be staying there with
his models. His friend owned a modeling agency. “It’ll be a model house for a
couple of months,” my mentor told me. I didn’t really have a choice in the matter,
but didn’t know that my life was about to leap frog once again. A model house
sounded cool, but didn’t know what that entailed. The move in day arrives and the
modeling agency owner shows up with his crew. 3 girls and him. I thought to
myself, “oh, this isn’t that bad.” Then a week goes by and 2 other girls move in. A
white girl and a brown girl. There she was. It hit me like a ton of bricks. My vision
board 10 just moved in. Her room was across from mine. She was half Puerto
Rican half white. You can probably tell I like brown girls by now. I was just house
sitting, but the girls thought it was my place. I always say to bend the truth a little,
never fully lie. So I let the girls know that I was house sitting for a friend, but they
still treated me like it was my house. Status signals bypass logic.
Many mornings I would wake up to professional photoshoots. Other models
collaborating with the agency that was staying at the mansion. Photographers with
huge social media followings. I would WAKE UP to this. I was still coaching at
night so I’d get home late and the photoshoots would start at 11am - 6pm. These
were all day events. Girls just undressing into different outfits in the middle of the
living room. Both downstair bathrooms filled with girl perfume, make up kits,
thongs, high heels. It was such a mind fuck for me because I had never been in a
living situation like this one. I loved every moment of it, but at the same time felt
like an imposter. The amount of status that was involved was overwhelming at
times. Beautiful women of all types. Professional photographers. Abundance of
food and drinks. And then there was me, a broke kid from LA that moved to Vegas
for this exact reason, but wasn’t quite used to it yet. No one knew I was broke
though. My social skills were far superior for anyone to even care. I would hold
conversations like a pro. I assumed I belonged and was hospitable to everyone that
was at the place I was looking after. My 10 eyeing me every now and then. Other
girls thanking me for letting them use my place to shoot content. The
photographers inviting me to other photoshoots because they got to shoot at the
mansion that they also thought was mine. My mentors coming in on random days.
A recurring thought I always had was, “How the fuck do I get myself into these
situations that I don’t belong in?” But my own inner game needed time to catch up
to my external results. You don’t have to feel ready before you do something that
you really want to do. You get ready by doing it. You do it by going through the
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emotions of growth — pain, stress, nervousness, anxiety, fear, imposter syndrome.
And reframe these emotions as GOOD. Because anyone who has success has also
gone through them. You can’t avoid them if you want to grow.
I was at Omnia with a Chilean girl I had met the night before at Marquee showing
her the Vegas life. She was visiting with her sister and her sisters boyfriend, but
didn’t want to third wheel anymore. I won her group over the night before so that’s
why they were okay with her not being with them and her hanging with me. After
an hour or so, I tell her to come with me to my friends mansion. I quickly learned
that saying mansion makes women want to come over with very little hesitation. I
could of downplayed it but I was being lazy. I was going out so much meeting new
girls every week that my indifference game was sharp. I wasn’t doing it as a
technique anymore, I actually didn’t care. She finishes her drink and we start
walking out of the club. We head to the parking garage where my car was and as
we were walking there, I told her to text her sister the following: “Hey, Hancel and
I are going to walk around the casino, we’ll be right back.” This handles the safety
trigger and also shows that this isn’t my first rodeo. Send. She text her sister and
we bounce to the mansion. Car rides should always be fun. Let her pick the first
few songs to make her feel comfortable, then you can play your playlist or
whatever you listen to. Keep the energy up, absolutely no lulls. We pull up to the
mansion and every girl I would pull back would be amazed with the outside as we
parked. They always made comments about how nice it was. Status hits are
amazing. We walk up to the door and walk in. My 10 and some other girls were
drinking in the kitchen that night. So I introduce the models to the Chilean girl.
They each sized each other up in a split second. My 10 stared at me a little longer
than normal that night. But I didn’t care because I had this other girl with me. I
make us a drink then give her a tour of the crib. We end up upstairs in the game
room and start playing pool. I turn on the bluetooth speaker and play background
music to increase the vibe. The Chilean wasn’t giving me to many IOIs so I played
the patient game. After an hour or so, I went in to kiss her. Denied. So I take a step
back, laugh it off and continue playing pool. Talk about nonsense and try again
later. Denied again. And it this point she was mentioning she should go back to her
sister. I knew I needed more comfort but was too lazy to care. I get her an uber,
give her a hug and send her back to Caesars Palace. I walk to the backyard through
the side of the house and my 10 was sitting outside by herself.
10: “Where’s your friend? She was pretty.”
Me: “She just left.”
10: “Oh. Is everything okay?”
Me: “Ya, she was tired and wanted to go rest.”
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10: “Well, she seemed nice.”
Me: “She’s okay.”
And after some back and forth conversation, I could for the first time sense
STRONG IOIs coming from her. This time it was undeniable. She had anime eyes,
her body was leaned in towards me, her hair was long and straight but tucked
behind her ear so I could see her face, and her voice was high pitched every time
she would laugh at my dumb jokes. I pull her chair towards mine. And I look at her
big eyes before going in for the kiss. I was on cloud 9 for several days afterwards. I
just hooked up with my 10. My first universal 10. Theres something about a girl
who’s a 9+ that makes every erotic experience with her an intoxicating explosion
of sexual tension. A handjob from a 10 is better than sex with fifteen 7s. We dated
for six months after that. It was a breakthrough to breakdown how this even
happened. Can you guess the answer?
Logistics. Logistics will always trump game. I ended up breaking up with her after
six months because I was at a point in my life where my work was my top priority.
It was extremely difficulty to let her go, but I had to. Actually, looking back maybe
we could have made it work, but I was too selfish with my freedom. I knew the
next couple years were about to be filled with hustle. My mission came before
everyone, friends, family & girlfriend included. Funny story, but she went on to do
porn for Brazzers. She’s a big time porn star in the industry now. 600K+ followers
on Instagram. We’re still friends, we just don’t talk. If you’re reading this, I hope
you’re well. Thanks for the good times.
Lingerie Private Party
We were doing shots out of the bottle. We had the best table inside Hakkasan
Nightclub. It was another Sunday night for me in the best cities designed for social
circle game. I’d say, there were at least 20 girls with us at the girl guy table that
night. My pivot and I partied all the time because she was naturally extroverted and
loved to go out and socialize. For the remainder of the story, we’ll call her “pivot.”
She was my best friend and a lethal wing woman. I had trained her so well after
several months of trial and error to game for me. She would do all the work, I was
just there to guide her and keep her on track. As you know, girls are all over the
place and at times in the night she’d forget the objective so I’d subtly reminded her
to keep talking to girls. We were a perfect duo. She complimented me so well and I
added colossal amounts of value to her. Tables every night, photoshoots, dinners,
penthouse parties, exclusive events and I even took her to the Maxim party in LA
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once with other models to help her career. I was meeting hundreds of girls a week
and she was just one of many. Except that after sometime of crushing Vegas, I
found her on accident, but immediately realized the future potential of having a
popular model like her as my pivot. Text book game, I friend zoned her, she got
upset, tried escalating on me, but with her I really meant when I told her I just
wanted to be friends. She eventually accepted the frame and our friendship was
founded on a disqualifier which made her incredibly suggestive to helping me get
laid with other girls. She is one of my most valuable assets that I have to this day.
22 year old Asian model. Funny, outgoing, positive attitude, always laughing and
down to introduce her friends and new girls to me.
So back to the club. Hakkasan was the place to be on Sunday nights during winter
time. Arguably the most beautiful cocktail waitresses work in all of Vegas work at
HK. Anyways, it was around 1am when she gets a text from a friend.
Pivot: “I just got invited to a lingerie mansion party, should we go?”
Me: “Yes.”
Pivot: “Okie ima find out where it’s at and we’ll go.”
Me: “Dope, wanna take some girls from here?”
Pivot: “Nah, there’ll be hotter ones over there. They’re in lingerie! Haha.”
Me: “Word, how far is it?”
Pivot: “20 minutes from here, let’s go now?”
Me: “Yeah, I’ll get the uber.”
And we leave HK to head to this lingerie party. Up until this point, it was around
six months of living in Vegas and I had never been to a lingerie party in my life.
But, how could you pass up on such an invite, right? We hop in the uber, pretty lit
off our asses laughing the whole way there. Uber driver looked at us and said, “you
two make a good couple.” And pivot and I looked at each other for a second, and
started laughing again. “Nah bro, she’s like my little sister.” Although, secretly I
knew she always liked me, but NOT fucking her was way more valuable for my
life than the momentary, fleeting pleasure of sleeping with yet another girl. 20
minutes go by and we’re pulling up to this huge mansion in a gated community.
We both walk up to the door, and if you know anything about high end events, they
always want to keep the ratios with more women than men. I had one girl with me,
but she knew the people that were throwing this event so she had a lot more social
proof than I did so I figured I’d be good. Knock, knock. Then some guy opens the
door and closes it behind him.
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Door guy: “Who are you two?”
Pivot: “Hi, my friend _____ invited us, is she here?”
Door guy: “Yeah, but he can’t come in.”
Pivot: “Why not? He’s with me and my friend said it was cool.”
Door guy: “No more guys allowed.”
Pivot: “Ok well if he can’t come in then I won’t go in either. We’ll wait out here
and I’ll text my friend to come get us.”
Door guy: “Aight whatever…” (and opens the door reluctantly but kinda pissed)
You see, when you have social proof, better yet, pre-selection you get access to
things you otherwise would have never been able to. Never roll up to an event, a
table, or a party solo. Always have at least ONE girl with you that’s an 8 or above.
Beautiful women are assets that you should leverage to make your life easier.
We walk in and I see stunners all in see through lingerie. Can you guess what I’m
gonna say next? “How the fuck do I keep getting myself into these situations that I
don’t belong in?” I also see a pool table which I separate from my pivot to get see
if I can get a game in. When you’re at a place where the girl you’re with knows
more people, immediately begin talking to other girls. Socialize and own the space
because when you’re uncomfortable your body language will shrink which will kill
all your value. On the other hand, by being expansive and talking to other girls,
you increase your comfort in the environment. I also made it a point to find out
who’s crib I was in because I wanted to be cool with him since I was at his place.
As I’m hanging at the pool table, I’m already in set with a girl and she tells me,
“oh that’s him, the owner of this house.” Sweet, so I go up to him and tell him that
he really knows how to throw a party and if there was anything I could do for him.
Extra bottles, more girls etc. Owner tells me, “we’re good here bro, have a good
time.” Now, as I’m talking to him, I’m making sure to make eye contact with as
many people as possible so they see the association. This increased my value, but
also secured my spot at the event where I knew NO ONE. Savvy?
I get next game on the pool table and start murdering it. My dad was a pool shark
and taught me how to play as a kid. Thanks, dad because my skills that night really
carried me through. By being really good at pool, I was building social proof
within that area where other girls could see me shine. Remember, I knew nobody
but I wasn’t going to stand up against the wall like a loser, scanning the room
waiting for something interesting to happen. Then, my pivot comes back.
Pivot: “Hey, so which one do you like?”
Me: “What? What do you mean?” (I was so into the game)
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Pivot: “Which girl do you like here? Haha”
Me: “Oh shit, I’ve been eyeing that one over there, with the pink.”
Pivot: “I’ll be right back.”
Me: (continues to sink another ball in)
Pivot: “This is my best friend Hancel, I want you to meet him.”
Me: “Hey good to meet you.”
Pivot: “Hancel this is my friend ________.”
Friend: “Hi, nice to meet you too.”
Pivot: “No, this is Hancel, I want you to MEET him.” (girl lingo)
Friend: “Ohhhh, hiii.”
That night, was when I realized the power of pre-selection. I understood what had
just happened, even though it had never happened before. The three of us looked at
each other and nodded in agreement. My pivot leaves and her friend stays. I crush
the rest of game and grab her hand to lead her to the bar to get drinks. We talked
for a few minutes and I just saw how ON it was between this complete stranger
and I who was half naked in see through lingerie so I immediately begin looking
for a place to close. Keep in mind there were lots of people at this mansion so most
rooms were occupied. After some back and forth around the house, I find the
upstairs balcony with a huge couch outside empty. And the rest is history…
I call this referral pussy. You get laid through the association. Your female friend,
pivot or girl you’re already sleeping with gives another girl the OK. I did nothing
and slept with a new girl, that was brought to me, in lingerie willing to sleep with
me because another girl told her to. Bio-mechanics is wild. Women would rather
share a high value male than to be faithful to a low value one. Ever since this night,
my entire focus was on influencing my female friends to get me laid. I stopped
cold approaching for years after this because I didn’t need to anymore. I was being
referred to women by women in the female networks I had built.
We end up leaving the party around 5am, I drop my pivot off at her place, and then
I head home in a state of complete bliss. “New paradigm, who dis?” I thought to
myself because I felt an internal shift within me. Social circle is the greatest thing I
ever invested myself into with the highest ROI I’ve ever received.
I thought to myself, “how am I so lucky to live like this?” Maybe I can help others
get similar results. Maybe I can help someone meet the “girl of his dreams,” or
learn to pursue life the way I do.
I’ll become a coach I figured, people need to know about this shit.
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Practice
“All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better.”
— Ralph Waldo Emerson
Imagine 90 days from now, having the SKILL set to hook up with your 9 or 10.
That is my aim for you. Practicing to increase your skills in the art of social circle
game. You have nothing to lose when you see all of this as practice. Rejection is
unavoidable, but knowing this lessens the sting. It’s not about the girl you meet
tonight, or tomorrow, or the next day. It’s about becoming more attractive through
real life experience so you can get a feel for what works and what doesn’t.
The only reason I am able to teach this is because I’ve failed much more than I
would like to admit. Mentorship lessened the blows, but evolution requires you to
go through your own unique journey of growth. Therefore, the pain of failure is
unavoidable. Failure and success are best friends and to have one you must
embrace the other. Realize that all the women you meet are there to help you
become better. Once I understood this, I was free to fuck around because its called
social circle “game” not social circle logic. It’s a game that is meant to be played.
It can be won if you learn the rules to then break them.
Practice everything you’ve read throughout these pages. Every sentence is in here
for a reason, every piece of information is immensely valuable. I wish nothing but
success and crazy stories where you’ll look back and be glad you lived a life of
adventure with beautiful women. Remain a student for life and you’ll always win.
THE END
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