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Examples of the Standards
for Students’ Writing
From the January 2009 Diploma Examination
• Visual Reflection Assignment
• Literary Exploration Assignment
• Persuasive Writing in Context Assignment
English Language
Arts 30–2
This document was written primarily for:
Students
Teachers
Administrators
Parents
General Public
Others
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
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Copyright 2009, the Crown in Right of Alberta, as represented by the Minister of Education, Alberta
Education, Learner Assessment, 44 Capital Boulevard, 10044 108 Street NW, Edmonton, Alberta T5J 5E6,
and its licensors. All rights reserved.
Special permission is granted to Alberta educators only to reproduce, for educational purposes and on a
non-profit basis, parts of this document that do not contain excerpted material.
Excerpted material in this document shall not be reproduced without the written permission of the original
publisher (see credits, where applicable).
Contents
Acknowledgements
ii
Introduction
1
English Language Arts 30–2 January 2009 Writing Assignments
3
Assignment I: Visual Reflection
4
Assignment II: Literary Exploration
6
Assignment III: Persuasive Writing in Context
9
English Language Arts 30–2 Part A: Written Response
Standards Confirmation
12
Background
12
Impressions of Standards Confirmers January 2009
13
Examples of Students’ Writing with Teachers’ Commentaries
15
English Language Arts 30–2 Visual Reflection Assignment,
January 2009
15
English Language Arts 30–2 Literary Exploration Assignment,
January 2009
24
English Language Arts 30–2 Persuasive Writing in Context
Assignment, January 2009
46
Scoring Categories and Criteria
55
Acknowledgements
Publication of this document would not have been possible without the permission of the
students whose writing is presented. The co-operation of these students has allowed us to
continue defining the standards of writing performance expected in connection with
diploma examinations and demonstrating approaches taken by students in their writing.
This document includes the valuable contributions of many educators. Sincere thanks and
appreciation are extended to the following Standards Confirmers: Claudia Hanevy,
Keri Helgren, Sandy Lee, Brian Lindstrand, Brianna Storey, Richard Wagner, and
Kjirsten Wilson.
We gratefully acknowledge the contributions made by members of the Humanities Unit
and the Document Design and Desktop Publishing Unit of Learner Assessment,
Alberta Education.
You can reach us with your comments and questions by e-mail to
Philip.Taranger@gov.ab.ca, Janet.Clark@gov.ab.ca, or Tim.Coates@gov.ab.ca,
or by regular mail at
Alberta Education
Box 43
44 Capital Boulevard
10044 108 Street NW
Edmonton, Alberta T5J 5E6
We would be pleased to hear from you.
ii
Introduction
The written responses in this document are examples of English Language Arts 30–2
Diploma Examination writing that received scores of Satisfactory (S), Proficient (Pf), or
Excellent (E). These sample responses are taken from the January 2009 administration.
Along with the commentaries that accompany them, they should help you and your
students to understand the standards for English Language Arts 30–2 Diploma
Examination writing in relation to the scoring criteria.
The purpose of the sample responses is to illustrate the standards that governed the
January 2009 marking session and that anchor the selection of similar sample responses
for subsequent marking sessions in 2008. The sample papers and the commentaries were
used to train markers to apply the scoring criteria consistently and to justify their
decisions about scores in terms of each student’s work and the criteria.
The sample responses included in this document represent a very small sample of
successful approaches to the assignments.
Selection and Use of Sample Papers
The teachers on the Standards Confirmation Committee for the January 2009 marking
session selected the examples of student responses included here. They also wrote the
commentaries that discuss the students’ writing in terms of the scoring criteria used for
marking.
During their preparation for the January 2009 marking session, markers reviewed and
validated the standards represented by these sample responses. Markers then used these
sample responses as guidelines for marking the written-response sections of the January
2009 English Language Arts 30–2 Diploma Examination.
Cautions
1. The commentaries are brief.
The commentaries were written for groups of markers to discuss and apply during the
marking session. Although brief, they provide a model for relating specific examples
from student work to the details in a specific scoring criterion.
2. Neither the scoring guide nor the assignments are meant to limit students to a
single organizational or rhetorical approach in completing any diploma
examination assignment.
Students must be free to select and organize their materials in a manner that they feel
will enable them to best present their ideas. In fact, part of what is being assessed is
the final effectiveness of the content, the form and structure, and the rhetorical choices
that students make.
1
The student writing in this document illustrates just a few of the many successful
organizational and rhetorical strategies in January 2009.
We strongly recommend that you caution your students that there is no preferred
approach to an assignment except the approach that best accomplishes the student
writer’s goal of effectively communicating his or her own ideas about the topic.
We advise you not to draw any conclusions about common patterns of approach taken by
students.
3. The sample papers presented in this document must not be used as models for
instructional purposes.
Because these papers are illustrations only, and because they are sample responses to
a set topic, students must be cautioned not to memorize the content of any of these
assignments and not to use them when completing classroom assignments or when
writing future diploma examinations. Examination markers and staff at Alberta
Education take any possibility of plagiarism or cheating seriously. The consequences
for students are grave.
The approaches taken by students at the standard of excellence, not their words or
ideas, are what students being examined in the future should consider emulating. In
fact, it is hoped that the variety of approaches presented here will inspire students to
experiment with diction, syntax, and form and structure as ways of developing an
individual voice and engaging the reader in ideas and forms that the student has
considered.
4. It is essential that you consider each of these examples of student writing in light
of the constraints of the examination situation.
Under examination conditions, students produce first-draft writing. Given more time,
students would be expected to produce papers of considerably improved quality,
particularly in the dimensions of Presentation, Matters of Correctness, and
Writing Skills.
2
January 2009
English Language Arts 30–2
Part A: Written Response
Grade 12 Diploma Examination
Description
Instructions
Time: 2½ hours. This examination was
developed to be completed in 2½ hours;
however, you may take an additional
½ hour to complete the examination.
• Complete all three assignments.
• You may use the following print
references:
–an English and/or bilingual dictionary
–a thesaurus
–an authorized writing handbook
Plan your time carefully.
Part A: Written Response contributes
50% of the total English Language Arts
30–2 Diploma Examination mark and
consists of three assignments.
• Space is provided in this booklet for
planning and for your written work.
• Use blue or black ink for your written
work.
• Assignment I:
Visual Reflection
Value 10% of total examination mark
• Assignment II:
Literary Exploration
Value 25% of total examination mark
Additional Instructions for Students
Using Word Processors
• Format your work using an easy-to-read
12-point or larger font such as Times.
• Assignment III:
Persuasive Writing in Context
Value 15% of total examination mark
• Double-space your final copy.
• Staple your final printed work to the
pages indicated for word-processed work
for each assignment. Hand in all work.
• Indicate in the space provided on the
back cover that you have attached
word-processed pages.
Do not write your name anywhere in this
booklet. Feel free to make corrections and
revisions directly on your written work.
3
ASSIGNMENT I: VISUAL REFLECTION
Suggested time: 30 to 40 minutes
© Peter Menzel
©Peter Menzel / from the book “Hungry Planet, What the World Eats”
by Peter Menzel and Faith D’Aluisio / www.menzelphoto.com
The first photograph features a family from Europe and the second one a family from
Africa. Each family is seen at home with the food they would eat in a typical week.
© Peter Menzel
(©Peter Menzel /from the book
"Hungry Planet, What the World Eats" by Peter Menzel
and Faith D'Aluisio/www.menzelphoto.com
© 2005 Peter Menzel / Hungry Planet: What the World Eats / www.menzelphoto.com)
©Peter Menzel / from the book “Hungry Planet, What the World Eats”
by Peter Menzel and Faith D’Aluisio / www.menzelphoto.com
ELA30-2_09 What the world eats 2 CMYK
ELA30-2_09 What the
42world eats 1 CMYK
(©Peter Menzel /from the book
"Hungry Planet, What the World Eats" by Peter Menzel
and Faith D'Aluisio/www.menzelphoto.com
© 2005 Peter Menzel / Hungry Planet: What the World Eats / www.menzelphoto.com)
ASSIGNMENT I: VISUAL REFLECTION
Examine the photographs on page 2. Reflect upon the ideas and impressions suggested by
the photographs.
The Assignment
What ideas and impressions do the photographs suggest to
you? Consider the context, and develop your response by
referring to the photographs.
In your writing, you may respond personally, critically, and/or creatively.
You must
• select a prose form that is appropriate to the ideas you wish to express and that will
enable you to effectively communicate to the reader
• consider how you can create a strong unifying effect
Initial Planning
There is additional space for planning on pages 4 and 6.
53
ASSIGNMENT II: LITERARY EXPLORATION
Suggested time: 70 to 80 minutes
Read the following excerpt from a novel and complete the assignment that follows.
Digory’s friend Polly has been tricked by Uncle Andrew into touching one of the magic
rings he has invented. Polly has vanished, and Uncle Andrew is attempting to persuade
Digory to follow her and bring her back. As the excerpt begins, Uncle Andrew is
explaining how the rings work.
from THE MAGICIAN’S NEPHEW
He got up, put on a pair of gloves, and walked over to the tray that contained the
Rings.
“They only work,” he said, “if they’re actually touching your skin. Wearing gloves,
I can pick them up—like this—and nothing happens. If you carried one in your pocket
nothing would happen: but of course you’d have to be careful not to put your hand in
your pocket and touch it by accident. The moment you touch a Yellow Ring, you vanish
out of this world. When you are in the Other Place I expect—of course this hasn’t been
tested yet, but I expect—that the moment you touch a Green Ring you vanish out of that
world and—I expect—reappear in this. Now. I take these two Greens and drop them into
your right-hand pocket. Remember very carefully which pocket the Greens are in. G for
Green and R for right. G.R. you see: which are the first two letters of Green. One for you
and one for the little girl. And now you pick up a Yellow one for yourself. I should put it
on—on your finger—if I were you. There’ll be less chance of dropping it.”
Digory had almost picked up the Yellow Ring when he suddenly checked himself.
“Look here,” he said. “What about Mother? Supposing she asks where I am?”
“The sooner you go, the sooner you’ll be back,” said Uncle Andrew cheerfully.
“But you don’t really know whether I can get back.”
Uncle Andrew shrugged his shoulders, walked across to the door, unlocked it, threw it
open, and said:
“Oh very well then. Just as you please. Go down and have your dinner. Leave the
little girl to be eaten by wild animals or drowned or starved in Other World or lost there
for good, if that’s what you prefer. It’s all one to me. Perhaps before tea time you’d better
drop in on Mrs. Plummer and explain that she’ll never see her daughter again; because
you were afraid to put on a ring.”
“By gum,” said Digory, “don’t I just wish I was big enough to punch your head!”
Then he buttoned up his coat, took a deep breath, and picked up the Ring. And he
thought then, as he always thought afterwards too, that he could not decently have done
anything else.
C.S. Lewis
THE MAGICIAN’S NEPHEW by C. S. Lewis copyright © C. S. Lewis Pte. Ltd. 1955.
Extract reprinted by permission.
69
The Assignment
In this excerpt, a character decides to do the courageous thing and attempt to rescue his
friend, even though he doesn’t know what dangers may lie ahead.
What is your opinion of the idea that courage
is an important quality?
You must
• discuss a character from literature or film that you have studied in English Language
Arts 30–2. You may choose to discuss more than one character
• ensure that the details you select support your opinion of the idea that courage is an
important quality
• present your ideas in prose
You should
• reflect upon your own knowledge and/or experience and/or the reading selection
provided
• use the Personal Reflection on Choice of Character(s) from Literary Text(s)
(see page 11) to help you select a character who is relevant to this assignment and
interesting to you from the short stories, novels, plays, poetry, nonfiction, or films that
you have studied in English Language Arts 30–2
• carefully consider your controlling idea or how you will create a strong unifying effect
in your response. Organize your discussion so that your ideas are clearly and effectively
presented
10
7
Assignment II: Literary Exploration
Initial Planning
Please use this space for your initial planning. This information assists markers in
identifying the text(s) and character(s) you have chosen. The markers who read your
composition will be very familiar with the literary texts you have chosen.
Literary Text(s)
Author(s)
Character(s)
Personal Reflection on Choice of Character(s) from Literary Text(s)
Suggested time: 10 minutes
Briefly explain why you chose this character to develop your opinion of the idea that
courage is an important quality. Markers will consider the information you provide here
when determining the effectiveness of your response.
There is additional space for planning on pages 12, 14, 16, and 18.
11
8
ASSIGNMENT III: PERSUASIVE WRITING IN CONTEXT
Suggested time: 40 to 50 minutes
Read the situation described below and use it to complete the assignment that follows.
The Situation
Recognizing the potentially dangerous situations that exist in many North American
schools, the Prosper School Board is considering a proposal to install a state-of-the-art
security system in Prosper School and in their school buses. Those in favour believe that
the initiative will ensure that Prosper School continues to be a safe and secure learning
and teaching environment. Opponents consider the security system to be not only
expensive but unnecessary and intrusive.
In deciding whether or not to accept the proposal, the Prosper School Board has invited
concerned individuals to make their views known. You are Sevan Reynolds, a Grade 12
student at Prosper High School. You have considered information and opinions from
a variety of sources (see pages 22 and 23). After considering the advantages and
disadvantages of the proposal, you have reached a decision. You now need to write a
persuasive letter that clearly explains
• your decision on whether or not the school board should accept the proposal
• the reasons why you believe your decision to be the best decision
The Assignment
Write a letter that will persuade the Prosper
School Board either to ACCEPT or REJECT the
proposal to install a security system.
In preparing your letter, BE SURE TO
• consider your purpose and audience
• study the information on the following pages
• use an appropriate tone
Remember that you must clearly and directly choose either to accept or to reject the
proposal.
21
9
What is the proposed installation of a security system?
The proposal is to install a video surveillance management
system with cameras within the school, on the school
roof, and on school buses. External doors will have metal
detectors. All staff, including teachers, aides, bus drivers,
and administrative support, and all volunteers must have
security clearance by the police service. Security ID badges
will be required for students and staff. A Safe Team comprised of representatives from the
School Council, the Student Council, and the staff will be responsible for safety planning
and coordination. This proposal reinforces the present contribution of the police in the
role of the School Resource Officer.
Statement from the Prosper School Protection Committee
We support the proposal to make safety a priority in Prosper School. The surveillance
plan will give us peace of mind, mainly because individuals planning illegal acts will
be deterred by the presence of the cameras. As well, we can more easily identify those
who do offend with graffiti, theft, and vandalism and those who bully and harass others,
especially in areas that are difficult to supervise. We are convinced that if students know
they are being monitored they are likely to behave properly and pay attention to their
learning while growing in self-esteem and good citizenship.
Statement from Parents for Personal Privacy
We are opposed to this proposal. The cost may well be
prohibitive, especially when we really do not know if Prosper
School needs such a system. We do not know how effective
it will be, and we do not know what we will have to factor
in for long-term maintenance and upgrading equipment. But
more important is the very real concern for loss of privacy for
staff and students alike and the possibility of an individual
being targeted for surveillance based on rumour, suspicion, or
malicious gossip. We are convinced that this proposal will have
a seriously damaging effect on student morale.
22
10
Opinions on the proposal to install a security system
I’ve just returned from spring break, visiting my cousin in
the U.S. His school had just finished their break, so I got
a chance to see his school. Bizarre. At the front door where
there was a metal detector, he had to call a security guard
to take me to the main office to get a special pass. Then,
a sniffer dog sort of nosed around me. There were cameras
everywhere, except in the bathrooms. I felt like I was a
criminal. I don’t think Prosper School needs to become like
a prison.
Ali Blazer, Grade 11 student
I have a cousin in Ontario who has been really sick this year
and had to stay home. His school has a security system that
includes web cams in every classroom. He can watch and
listen to the lessons, the discussions, and the group activities. He can even replay them if
he misses something. He says he doesn’t feel totally out of it anymore because, in a way,
he is participating in school life and he can talk to his friends about what happened. We
have lots of students who could benefit from this technology, especially when the weather
is crappy and the buses aren’t running, which happens a lot here.
Ellis Peters, Grade 12 student
The emotional and psychological consequences must be taken into account before we go
further with this proposal. One of our major goals as a school is to encourage students to
be critically aware, confident, independent, and creative human beings. If students feel
that they are being spied on or if they sense that they are not trusted, they can neither
feel comfortable nor develop a sense of responsibility and good citizenship. Instead of
creating a safe and secure school climate, this proposal will create a culture of fear.
Madita deVries, school counsellor
We thoroughly support this proposal. Recent violent
and tragic events in a number of educational institutions
throughout North America must be a reminder that
providing safe schools is what society owes its young
people. We must be vigilant in protecting our students and,
indeed, the school itself. The surveillance system will deter
property damage in and outside of the school, and it will
ensure acceptable student and staff behaviour. We cannot
but think that those who oppose the concept are most likely
those who would be offenders.
Sam and Sue Balarian, parents
23
11
English Language Arts 30–2 Part A: Written Response
Standards Confirmation
Background
For all diploma examination scoring sessions, Learner Assessment staff use a process
called Standards Confirmation to establish and illustrate expectations for students’ work
in relation to the scoring criteria, as well as to ensure scoring consistency within and
between marking sessions. Because there are several diploma examination
administrations and scoring sessions each school year, the standards must remain
consistent for each scoring session in the school year and, similarly, from year to year.
Standards for student achievement start with the demands of the Program of Studies for
Senior High School English Language Arts and with the interpretation of those demands
through learning resources and classroom instruction. These agreed-upon standards are
also exemplified in the kinds of tasks and the degree of independence expected of
students. All of these complex applications of standards precede the design, development,
and scoring of each diploma examination.
The Standards Confirmation Committee comprises experienced teachers from
representative regions of the province. These teachers work with the Learner Assessment
staff responsible for the development, scoring, and results reporting for each diploma
examination. Teacher-members participate over a two-year period and are required to
serve as group leaders or markers during at least one of the subsequent marking sessions.
There are two essential parts to applying standards at the point of examination scoring:
the expectations embedded in the scoring criteria and the examples of students’ work that
illustrate the scoring criteria within each scoring category. The scoring categories and
scoring criteria are available to teachers and students via the 2009–2010 English
Language Arts 30–2 Information Bulletin. During each of the January and June marking
sessions, example papers selected by members of the Standards Confirmation Committee
are used to train markers. Subsequent to each marking session, the example papers that
received scores of Satisfactory (S), Proficient (Pf), and Excellent (E) are posted on the
Alberta Education website at www.education.alberta.ca in the documents entitled
Examples of the Standards for Students’ Writing.
The standards confirmation process
• confirms the appropriateness of the standards set by the examination in relation to
students’ work
• selects student responses that clearly illustrate the standards in the scoring
categories and the scoring criteria to be used when training markers
• writes rationales that explain and support the selection of sample papers in terms of
the scoring categories, scoring criteria, and students’ work
12
English Language Arts 30–2
Impressions of Standards Confirmers
January 2009
Assignment I: Visual Reflection
The photographs of the European and the African families proved very accessible to
students; so much so that nearly everyone who wrote was able to see and comment on the
disparity in the photographs. Many students developed “global” ideas that included
discussions of the wealth and abundance of Western countries compared to that of
countries in Africa. Given the obvious nature of the contrast between the photographs,
markers should evaluate the effectiveness of the response in terms of the quality of the
idea that the student develops and the strength of the support provided. Students often
commented on the significance of the African family being larger despite having fewer
resources to support them. Many students commented on their own feelings of being
undeserving of the wealth of choices they take for granted and often remarked on the type
of “trivial’ things they are concerned with (iPods and cell phones) compared to the very
real concerns that people in developing countries face. Students frequently made a variety
of assumptions about the relative happiness of each of the families in the photographs. As
always, students’ understanding of particular countries and cultures varied, and some
students made statements that were oversimplified or incorrect. Such assumptions and
statements did not affect the quality of the responses.
Assignment II: Literary Exploration
The reading selection from The Magician’s Nephew and the topic of courage engaged
student writers. Students discussed their ideas on the topic in relation to personal
observations, their own experiences, and literature and film studied in ELA 30–2.
Unifying effects were varied: some students chose to focus primarily on literature, while
others developed responses that focused on the importance of courage and related it to
personal experience and to characters from literature or film. Students frequently chose to
discuss more than one piece of literature, sometimes comparing the courage demonstrated
by individual characters and sometimes discussing each text separately. The nature of this
assignment also elicited a wide variety of personal experiences that were related
effectively to the topic. Markers are reminded that the focus of this assignment is on the
idea that the student develops in relation to the topic and on how effectively the student
explores and supports this idea. Thus, while the literary example is essential, it is but one
component of the response as a whole. Because literary examples are often brief and
tightly focused on a particular situation or character, markers were reminded to read the
information provided by students in the Personal Reflection on Choice of Character(s)
from Literary Text(s), and to ensure that they are familiar with the literature or films
chosen. Popular literary selections included Finding Fish, Fallen Angels, Fahrenheit 451,
A Streetcar Named Desire, Night, and Death of a Salesman. Students also used films such
as Pay It Forward, The Shawshank Redemption, Life is Beautiful, Schindler’s List, and
Hotel Rwanda.
13
Assignment III: Persuasive Writing in Context
The proposal to install a state-of-the art security system in Prosper High School generated
strong responses from student writers. Due to the comprehensive nature of the security
system proposal, many students recognized and accepted the need for security cameras
while questioning the necessity for such features as metal detectors, especially in a small
and relatively safe school like Prosper. These responses were seen as rejecting the
proposal as stated in the assignment. Students drew key details from the source material
and occasionally supplemented their arguments with references to their own personal
observations, experiences, and to incidents that have occurred in schools throughout
North America. Students also frequently noted additional benefits of the system such as
classroom webcams that would allow students not in school to “stay in touch” with
classroom activities. Some students also chose to acknowledge and refute positions from
the opposing side. Most students were well aware of their purpose in persuading the
Prosper School Board and maintained an appropriate tone.
14
Examples of Student’s Writing with Teacher’s Commentaries
English Language Arts 30–2
Visual Reflection Assignment, January 2009
Example Scored Satisfactory (S)
This example (page 15) is unavailable for posting.
15
English Language Arts 30–2
Visual Reflection Assignment, January 2009
Example Scored Proficient (Pf)
(Page 1 of 2)
16
(Page 2 of 2)
17
English Language Arts 30–2 January 2009
Assignment I: Visual Reflection
EXAMPLE PAPER—Proficient (Pf)
SCORING CRITERIA
RATIONALE
SCORE
Ideas and Impressions (Pf)
• The student’s perceptions
are thoughtful and
considered.
The student’s perception that “Although we
know there is a shortage of food in thirdworld countries and we see how much they
eat in a week, it is completely different to
see it next to an average family from
Europe” and the recognition that putting the
pictures together “makes you feel the guilt
of knowing how much you truly have
compared to others” are thoughtful and
considered.
• Support is relevant,
detailed, and clearly
connected to the student’s
ideas and impressions.
Support is relevant, as in “vast amount of
food” and “amount food in front of them is
very small”; detailed, as in “They look
fulfilled but not exactly happy,” “This
emotion is carried through by the lighting
and how they are standing in a darkened
part of the room,” and “The colors
surrounding the family are muted shades,
which really establish the sense of poverty
they live in”; and clearly connected to the
student’s ideas and impressions, as in “But
then how would your families weekly food
look if laid out in front of you?”
18
Pf
SCORING CRITERIA
RATIONALE
SCORE
Presentation (Pf)
• The student’s voice is
distinct and the tone is
well considered.
The student’s voice is distinct (“vast
amount of food,” “muted shades,” and
“establish the sense of poverty”) and the
tone is well considered (“shocking,”
“Again if you only saw the one picture how
would you see them?” and “the European
family are just ‘pigs’”).
• Stylistic choices are
specific and frequently
effective.
Stylistic choices are specific and frequently
effective: “shortage of food,” “fulfilled but
not exactly happy,” and “Now you look at
the people and they are dressed in bright
clothes that although simple are very nice.”
• The writing is coherently
developed, and the
unifying effect is capably
sustained.
The writing is coherently developed, and
the unifying effect is capably sustained
from the assertion that “the pictures would
look entirely different alone, although they
are meant to be shown together” through the
discussions of the two images to the
recognition that “together you get an
entirely different experience from the
images,” which “really puts things in
perspective.”
19
Pf
English Language Arts 30–2
Visual Reflection Assignment, January 2009
Example Scored Excellent (E)
(Page 1 of 2)
20
(Page 2 of 2)
21
English Language Arts 30–2 January 2009
Assignment I: Visual Reflection
EXAMPLE PAPER—Excellent (E)
SCORING CRITERIA
RATIONALE
SCORE
Ideas and Impressions (E)
• The student’s perceptions
are insightful and
carefully considered.
The student’s perceptions that “the
photographer who took this picture was
trying to reveal the startling truth of how
easily we dismiss the things we should be
greatful for and take so much for granted”
and that “Our society has lost it’s ability to
decipher between it’s needs and wants” are
insightful and carefully considered.
• Support is precise,
purposefully chosen, and
strongly connected to the
student’s ideas and
impressions.
Support, such as “If our lives were put in
Jeopardy on a weekly basis much like the
African family, would we not learn to
acknowledge the simple blessings,” “Having
little to no luxuries one must learn to be
resorcefull and develop strong work ethic,”
and “As gatherers, drivin to the edge of
starvation at each passing week, it is easy to
assume that the Africans are reasonably
greatfull for life and have established a deep
family connection,” is precise,
purposefully chosen, and strongly
connected to the student’s ideas and
impressions.
22
E
SCORING CRITERIA
RATIONALE
SCORE
Presentation (E)
• The student’s voice is
engaging and the tone is
confident.
The student’s voice is engaging throughout
the response with the use of rhetorical
questions: “Do you see a happy middle class
family blessed with prosperity?,” “do we
appreciate our loved ones as much as we
should?,” and “ask yourself wich society is
truly living in poverty?” The tone is
confident: “Our society has lost it’s ability,”
“The fact is that we are all guilty,” and “The
individual roles taken to ensure the survival
of the group instill a sense of purpose.”
• Stylistic choices are
precise and effective.
Stylistic choices—“selfishly taking more
than we need, blindly wasting what we
could have used and rarely giving a second
thought” and “If our lives were put in
jeopardy”—are precise and effective.
• The writing is skilfully
developed, and the
unifying effect is
confidently sustained.
The writing is skillfully developed and the
unifying effect is confidently sustained
from the initial question about the
photographs to the concluding rhetorical
question.
23
E
English Language Arts 30–2
Literary Exploration Assignment, January 2009
Example Scored Satisfactory (S)
24
(Page 1 of 2)
25
(Page 2 of 2)
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English Language Arts 30–2 January 2009
Assignment II: Literary Exploration
EXAMPLE PAPER—Satisfactory (S)
SCORING CRITERIA
RATIONALE
SCORE
Thought and Support (S)
• A defensible
A defensible understanding of the topic is
understanding of the topic demonstrated: “People would have to have
is demonstrated.
lots of courage to do what they did.”
• The student’s ideas are
appropriately and
straightforwardly
explored.
The student’s ideas are appropriately and
straightforwardly explored through
comments about The Magician’s Nephew
(“Digory has courage to go off in to anther
world”), Into the Wild (“Chris shows
courage by leave all of society be hind
him”), and the student’s own experience
about saving a friend from a bull.
• The literary example is
related adequately to the
student’s ideas.
The literary example is related
adequately to the student’s ideas, as in “If
Chris did not have a lot of courage he would
have not been able to live out in the wild as
long as he did with the amount of
experience he had.”
• Support is relevant but
tends to be general.
Support is relevant but tends to be general
in statements such as “Digory has courage
by standing up to his uncle and telling him
that if he was bigger he would punch him
right in the face,” “Chris goes out in to
Alaska with not that many supply’s,” and
“The one time when my friend ran across he
could not get away from the bulls so i had to
run in and scare the bulls away from him so
he could get away from them.”
27
S
SCORING CRITERIA
RATIONALE
SCORE
Form and Structure (S)
• A controlling idea or
unifying effect is evident,
but unity may falter on
occasion.
A controlling idea or unifying effect is
evident from the opening remark that
“People do many courageous things in there
lives” through to the final assertion that
“Every one should have courage it is very
important to have in life.”
• Development of ideas and Development of ideas and explanations is
explanations is generally generally clear and coherent in paragraphs
clear and coherent.
starting with the statements “In the excerpt
The Magician’s Nephew Digory shows that
he has a lot of courage,” “In the novel Into
the Wild Chris shows that he has courage,”
and “There has been one time when I have
shown courage.”
• The response moves to a
functional closure.
S
The response moves to a functional closure
in the summary of the ideas.
Matters of Choice (S)
• Diction is appropriate but
may be general rather
than specific.
Diction is appropriate but may be general
rather than specific, as in “Courage is an
important quality because people can be
very brave” and “His uncle tells him that he
needs to go get her so he does this.”
• Sentence structures are
generally straightforward
and clear.
Sentence structures are generally
straightforward and clear: “Chris gets rid
of all his identifications and leaves town”
and “We would take turns running across
the pen having the bulls chases us.”
• Stylistic choices
contribute to the creation
of a clear voice.
Stylistic choices—“he sent Digorys friend
off in to another world,” “When I was
younger I was at a friends house and we
were out playing in the bulls pen,” and “If
Chris did not have courage he would have
never followed his dream”—contribute to
the creation of a clear voice.
28
S
SCORING CRITERIA
RATIONALE
SCORE
Matters of Correctness (S)
• This writing demonstrates
control of the basics of
correct sentence
construction, usage,
grammar, and mechanics.
This writing demonstrates control of the
basics of correct sentence construction,
usage, and grammar, as in “Digory shows
that courage is an important quality to have
because Digory might be trapped in another
world because they do not know if the rings
work right,” “He burns the rest of the money
that he has and heads towards Alaska,” and
“Courage is a very important quality to
have.”
• There may be occasional
lapses in control of
sentence construction and
usage, and/or minor errors
in grammar and
mechanics.
There are occasional lapses in control of
sentence construction (“Chris from the
novel Into The Wild he is lots of courage”)
and usage (“there”), and minor errors in
grammar (“Chris shows courage by leave all
of society”) and mechanics (“supply’s” and
“friends”).
• The communication,
however, is clear.
The communication is clear.
29
S
English Language Arts 30–2
Literary Exploration Assignment, January 2009
Example Scored Proficient (Pf)
30
31
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(Page 2 of 3)
33
(Page 3 of 3)
34
English Language Arts 30–2 January 2009
Assignment II: Literary Exploration
EXAMPLE PAPER—Proficient (Pf)
SCORING CRITERIA
RATIONALE
SCORE
Thought and Support (Pf)
• A well-considered
A well-considered understanding of the
understanding of the topic topic is demonstrated through the student’s
is demonstrated.
discussion of the idea that courage “gives
you that little push when you start doubting
yourself.”
• The student’s ideas are
thoughtfully explored.
The student’s ideas are thoughtfully
explored both through the discussion of The
Shawshank Redemption, where Red
overcame the belief that prison was “where
he belonged after being there for so long,”
and through the student’s personal example
of returning to school.
• The literary example is
The literary example is related
related competently to the competently to the student’s ideas, as in
student’s ideas.
“Red finally got enough courage to travel to
visit his friend and was glad he had done so
because he proved to himself that living
outside of prison walls was possible.”
• Support is specific and
relevant.
Support is specific and relevant in the
discussion of how Red overcomes his
anxiety about facing the “‘real world’” and
in the student’s discussion of her own
experiences and the “gentle pushes” that
encouraged her to give school “another go.”
35
Pf
SCORING CRITERIA
RATIONALE
SCORE
Form and Structure (Pf)
• A controlling idea or
unifying effect is
sustained throughout the
response.
The controlling idea that “Courage is an
important quality because it makes you do
things that you thought were impossible” is
sustained throughout the response.
• Development of ideas and Development of ideas and explanations is
explanations is coherent. coherent through the discussions of Red
gaining the courage to re-enter the world
and the student’s decision to return to
school.
Pf
• The response moves to an The response moves to an appropriate
appropriate closure.
closure in the concluding paragraph where
the student summarizes her main ideas.
Matters of Choice (Pf)
• Diction is specific and
generally effective.
Diction is specific and generally effective,
as in “modernization,” “incarcerated,” and
“flying colours.”
• Many sentences appear to Sentences, such as “Red wanted to go see
have been purposefully
him but the sweet callings of ‘home’ kept
structured for effect.
calling him saying ‘It’s safe here, come
back to Shawshank,’” have been
purposefully structured for effect.
• Stylistic choices
contribute to the creation
of a competent voice.
Stylistic choices—“little extra ‘oomph’ of
self-confidence,” “stick out our chins and
marched forward,” and “get into the
groove”—contribute to the creation of a
competent voice.
36
Pf
SCORING CRITERIA
RATIONALE
SCORE
Matters of Correctness (Pf)
• This writing demonstrates The writing demonstrates competent
competent control of
control of correct sentence construction,
correct sentence
usage, grammar, and mechanics.
construction, usage,
grammar, and mechanics.
• Minor errors in
mechanics, grammar, and/
or complex language
structures are
understandable
considering the
circumstances.
Minor errors in mechanics, grammar, and
complex language structures are
understandable considering the
circumstances.
37
Pf
English Language Arts 30–2
Literary Exploration Assignment, January 2009
Example Scored Excellent (E)
(Page 1 of 3)
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(Page 2 of 3)
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(Page 3 of 3)
40
English Language Arts 30–2 January 2009
Assignment II: Literary Exploration
EXAMPLE PAPER—Excellent (E)
SCORING CRITERIA
RATIONALE
SCORE
Thought and Support (E)
• An insightful
An insightful understanding of the topic is
understanding of the topic demonstrated in the exploration of the idea
is demonstrated.
that “Without courage our world would not
be what it is today and the human race
would most definitely not have survived”
and in the recognition that “Courage shapes
what our cultures are and what kind of
individuals we are.”
• The student’s ideas are
perceptively explored.
The student’s ideas are perceptively
explored in the discussions of how
“Digory’s courageous ambitions are used to
save the little girl,” how “Forrest also uses
his courage to protect the people around
him that matter,” and how “Without
courage, the Soviets may not have made it
to space nor would they have been able to
compete against a space race with the
Americans and prevail.”
• The literary example is
related effectively to the
student’s ideas.
The literary example is related effectively
to the student’s ideas through such
statements as “during the Vietnam War he
prevailed with his sense of strong morals
and his astonishing sense of courage to
protect his friends” and “The courage
Forrest displayed is an important quality to
human beings as it assures our survival and
the survival of those around us.”
• Support is precise and
effective.
Support is precise and effective: “he
manages to muster the courage from inside
him as he knows that there is a small girl he
must protect,” “If it was not for that act of
courage, more men would have died and
Forrest would have most likely perished
along with them,” and “From … the first
Soviet Cosmonauts or the first human to
gaze into the night sky; all of these acts took
courage.”
41
E
SCORING CRITERIA
RATIONALE
SCORE
Form and Structure (E)
• A focused controlling
idea or unifying effect is
skillfully sustained
throughout the response.
A focused controlling idea is skillfully
sustained throughout the student’s
discussion of the excerpt, Forrest Gump,
and space exploration.
• Development of ideas and The development of ideas and explanations
explanations is smooth
is smooth and coherent through the
and coherent.
discussion of Digory facing “a task of
meeting the unknown in a place out of the
world,” Forrest having “strong moral values
and a sense of courage to do what is right,”
and humanity possessing “the quality of
courage that allowed man to explore out of
this world.”
• The response flows to an
effective closure.
E
The response flows to an effective closure
in “Traveling through time, saving friends
on a battle field or going where no man has
gone before takes great amounts of
courage.”
Matters of Choice (E)
• Diction is precise and
effective.
Diction, such as “great strides in
technological achievements,” “skeptical at
first,” “embark on this journey,” “dire
situation,” “preserve and protect life,” and
“courageous ambitions,” is precise and
effective.
• Many sentences have
been successfully
structured for effect and
are sometimes polished.
Many sentences have been successfully
structured for effect (“Ages ago during the
times of man and beast, man prevailed with
courage to survive”) and are sometimes
polished (“Although frightened and unsure
about the situation, Digory’s courageous
ambitions are used to save the little girl”).
• Stylistic choices
contribute to the creation
of a convincing voice.
Stylistic choices contribute to the creation
of a convincing voice: “Every war fought
on earth has been met with brave acts of
courage” and “all of these acts took courage
and that courage made the acts possible.”
42
E
SCORING CRITERIA
RATIONALE
SCORE
Matters of Correctness (E)
• This writing demonstrates
confident control of
correct sentence
construction, usage,
grammar, and mechanics.
• The relative absence of
error is impressive
considering the
complexity of the
response and the
circumstances.
This writing demonstrates confident
control of correct sentence construction,
usage, grammar, and mechanics: “One of
the best examples of courage can be seen
during the pioneering years of the space
race” and “If it was not for the courage of
the Cosmonauts and the rest of the Soviet
Union, man may have never made it into
space.”
The relative absence of error is impressive
considering the complexity of the response
and the circumstances.
43
E
English Language Arts 30–2
Literary Exploration Assignment, January 2009
Example Scored Satisfactory (S)
(Page 1 of 2)
44
(Page 2 of 2)
45
English Language Arts 30–2 January 2009
Assignment III: Persuasive Writing in Context
EXAMPLE PAPER—Satisfactory (S)
SCORING CRITERIA
RATIONALE
SCORE
Thought and Support (S)
• A sufficient but
generalized understanding
of the issue is
demonstrated.
A sufficient but generalized
understanding of the issue is demonstrated
as in “I am writing to you to show my
aproval on the proposed installations of
video surveillance and security system.”
• The student’s arguments
are appropriate and
straightforward.
The student’s arguments are appropriate
and straightforward: “The video
surveillance will allow for proper
punishment of crimes being comitted,” “this
security system will help monitor places
that are difficult to supervise,” and “This is
being used for our advantage and will
ensure safety and a pleasant enviomment.”
• Support is relevant but
general, and may be
occasionally lacking in
persuasiveness and
consistency.
Support is relevant but general: “with the
number of gangs and violence increasing
this is becoming harder to maintain,” “metal
detectors will keep out harmful weapons
and substances,” and “This system will very
expensive and will require regular
maintance.”
• Awareness of audience is
generally sustained.
Awareness of audience is generally
sustained from the introduction through to
the request to “Take into consideration
whats right for the students.”
46
S
SCORING CRITERIA
RATIONALE
SCORE
Writing Skillls (S)
• The selection and use of
words and structures are
occasionally effective.
• This writing demonstrates
basic control of correct
sentence construction,
usage, grammar, and
mechanics.
The selection and use of words and
structures are occasionally effective:
“becoming harder for routine supervision to
be effective” and “It is also becoming more
difficult to keep track of students so visible
security ID badges will protect us from
intruders.”
The writing demonstrates basic control of
correct sentence construction, usage,
grammar and mechanics (“Students, parents
and teachers could possibly find ways to
raise the money or school fees could be
increased”).
47
S
English Language Arts 30–2
Literary Exploration Assignment, January 2009
Example Scored Proficient (Pf)
(Page 1 of 2)
48
(Page 2 of 2)
49
English Language Arts 30–2 January 2009
Assignment III: Persuasive Writing in Context
EXAMPLE PAPER—Proficient (Pf)
SCORING CRITERIA
RATIONALE
SCORE
Thought and Support (Pf)
• A thoughtful and
competent understanding
of the issue is
demonstrated.
A thoughtful and competent
understanding of the issue is demonstrated
through the student’s recognition that with
the installation of a security system, the
“positives undeniably outweigh the
negatives.”
• The student’s arguments
are well considered and
sound.
The student’s arguments are well
considered and sound throughout the
discussion of how “This system is here to
make sure that our school is safe and
everyone throughout the school is in a
secure learning and teaching atmosphere.”
• Support is accurate and
occasionally purposefully
chosen to reinforce the
student’s ideas in a logical
and clear way.
Support is accurate and purposefully
chosen—“We are convinced that the
students will behave more properly if they
are being monitored,” “Since a lot of
students have to miss school because they
are sick or they are on vacation, they will
now be able to see what they learnt in class
through a web cam,” and “it will help stop
tragic events such as school shootings or
violence around the school.”
• Awareness of audience is
sustained.
Awareness of audience is sustained from
the student’s opening statement that he is
“here to tell you my opinion on the proposal
of installing a video surveillance
management system” to the conclusion
“Thank you for your time and consideration
and I hope you keep this in mind.”
50
Pf
SCORING CRITERIA
RATIONALE
SCORE
Writing Skills (Pf)
• The selection and use of
words and structures are
frequently effective.
• This writing demonstrates
competent control of
correct sentence
construction, usage,
grammar, and mechanics.
The selection and use of words—
“undeniably outweigh,” “bound to happen,”
“fast forward or rewind” and structures
—“Although people feel as if it cannot
happen here in Prosper, it can happen
anywhere and can happen when you least
expect it”—are frequently effective.
The writing demonstrates competent
control of correct sentence construction,
usage, grammar, and mechanics (“Some
people believe that installing this system for
Prosper High will cause students to feel that
they are being spied on or that they are
criminals”).
51
Pf
English Language Arts 30–2
Literary Exploration Assignment, January 2009
Example Scored Excellent (E)
52
English Language Arts 30–2 January 2009
Assignment III: Persuasive Writing in Context
EXAMPLE PAPER—Excellent (E)
SCORING CRITERIA
RATIONALE
SCORE
Thought and Support (E)
• A perceptive and
thorough understanding
of the issue is
demonstrated.
A perceptive and thorough understanding
of the issue is demonstrated in the student’s
recognition that “this security system would
be one of the best things that could happen
to Prosper High School”; yet, in “a small
school in a peaceful town,” several elements
of the proposed security system are
“unnecessary and redundant.”
• The student’s arguments
are adept and convincing.
The student’s argument that “Although our
school is not a typically dangerous one
since we live in a small town, I still feel it
necessary to bring in a security system,” but
that adopting the entire proposal will create
a school that is “intimidating” is adept and
convincing.
• Support is well defined
and purposefully chosen
to reinforce the student’s
ideas in a deliberate and
judicious way.
Support is well defined and purposefully
chosen: “Students typically spend more
time at school than they do at their own
home,” “Many violent events take place in
school grounds, and by installing a security
system, those violent and tragic events
would be limited, perhaps even stopped,”
“they deserve to be protected all the time,”
and “We don’t need metal detectors, or
drugs dogs, or even security guards; a few
cameras would suffice and get the job
done.”
• A precise awareness of
audience is effectively
sustained.
A precise awareness of audience is
effectively sustained from the opening
address through the rhetorical questions
(“Yes it may be a pricey experience, but
how can one put a cost on a child’s safety
and well being?” and “As they reach the
work force, there will be security cameras
there as well, so why is it such an alarming
idea to provide the same system in a
school?”) to the closing assertion that the
security system “is the right choice.”
53
E
SCORING CRITERIA
RATIONALE
SCORE
Writing Skills (E)
• The selection and use of
words and structures are
effective.
The selection and use of words and
structures are effective in statements such
as “We are a small school in a peaceful
town and a system that immense is just
unnecessary and redundant” and “The
security system is set up to keep the
students safe, not to ruin their creativity.”
• This writing demonstrates
confident control of
correct sentence
construction, usage,
grammar, and mechanics.
This writing demonstrates confident
control of correct sentence construction,
usage, grammar, and mechanics: “I feel that
this proposal is, without doubt, an admirable
one for many reasons and I am writing in
hopes that you will thoroughly recognize
my opinions and take them into
consideration” and “I understand what Ali
Blazer means when she stated how
intimidating the school was when she went
to visit her cousin, but why would we go to
that extent for a security system?”
54
E
Scoring Categories and Criteria
Scoring Categories and
Scoring Criteria for
2008–2009
Assignment I:
Visual Reflection
Ideas and Impressions (5% of total examination mark)
Cross-reference to the Program of Studies for Senior High
School English Language Arts 2.1 2.2 2.3 4.1
When marking Ideas and Impressions, the marker should
consider
• the quality of the ideas generated by the student to explore
the visual text(s) and the impressions that the student has
formed to reflect upon the visual text(s)
• the effectiveness and consistency of the support provided
Excellent (E)
The student’s perceptions are insightful
and carefully considered. Support is
precise, purposefully chosen, and strongly
connected to the student’s ideas and
impressions.
Proficient (Pf)
The student’s perceptions are thoughtful
and considered. Support is relevant,
detailed, and clearly connected to the
student’s ideas and impressions.
Satisfactory (S) The student’s perceptions are appropriate
but may be generalized. Support is
adequate and generally connected to the
student’s ideas and impressions.
Limited (L)
The student’s perceptions are superficial or
ambiguous. Support is imprecise, unclear,
and/or vaguely connected to the student’s
ideas and impressions.
Poor (P)
The student’s perceptions are
underdeveloped or incomprehensible.
Support is lacking, inappropriate, or
unrelated to the student’s ideas and
impressions.
Insufficient
(INS)
• The marker can discern no evidence of
an attempt to fulfill the assignment or
• The writing is so deficient in length that
it is not possible to assess Ideas and
Impressions.
55
Scoring Categories and
Scoring Criteria for
2008–2009
Assignment I:
Visual Reflection
Presentation (5% of total examination mark)
Cross-reference to the Program of Studies for Senior High
School English Language Arts 3.1 3.2 4.1 4.2
When marking Presentation, the marker should consider
• the effectiveness of voice and its appropriateness to the
intended audience of the prose form that the student has
chosen
• the quality of language and expression
• the appropriateness of development and unifying effect to
prose form
Consider the proportion of error in terms of the
complexity and length of the response.
Excellent (E)
The student’s voice is engaging and the
tone is confident. Stylistic choices are
precise and effective. The writing is
skillfully developed, and the unifying
effect is confidently sustained.
Proficient (Pf)
The student’s voice is distinct and the tone
is well considered. Stylistic choices are
specific and frequently effective. The
writing is coherently developed, and the
unifying effect is capably sustained.
Satisfactory (S) The student’s voice is matter-of-fact and
the tone is appropriate. Stylistic choices are
adequate and occasionally effective. The
writing is generally clearly developed, and
the unifying effect is appropriately
sustained.
Limited (L)
The student’s voice is inconsistent and/or
the tone is inappropriate. Stylistic choices
are inappropriate, imprecise, and often
ineffective. The writing is unclearly or
incoherently developed, and the unifying
effect is not sustained.
Poor (P)
The student’s voice is confused and/or
there is no discernible attempt to address
the intended audience. Stylistic choices are
ineffective and/or impede communication.
The writing is ineffectively developed, and/
or a unifying effect is absent.
56
Scoring Categories and
Scoring Criteria for
2008–2009
Assignment II:
Literary Exploration
Thought and Support (10% of total examination mark)
Cross-reference to the Program of Studies for Senior High School
English Language Arts 2.1 2.3 3.2 4.1 4.2
When marking Thought and Support, the marker should consider
how effectively
• the student’s ideas reflect an understanding of the topic
• the literary example relates to the student’s ideas
• the support explains and/or clarifies the response
Consider ideas presented in the Personal Reflection on Choice of
Character(s) from Literary Text(s).
Because students’ responses
to the Literary Exploration
Assignment vary widely—
from philosophical
discussions to personal
narratives to creative
approaches—assessment of
the Literary Exploration
Assignment on the diploma
examination will be in the
context of Louise
Rosenblatt’s suggestion:
… the evaluation of the
answers would be in terms of
the amount of evidence that
the youngster has actually
read something and thought
about it, not a question of
whether, necessarily, he has
thought about it the way an
adult would, or given an
adult’s “correct” answer.
Rosenblatt, Louise. “The
Reader’s Contribution in the
Literary Experience: Interview
with Louise Rosenblatt.” By
Lionel Wilson. English
Quarterly 14, no.1 (Spring,
1981): 3–12.
Excellent (E)
An insightful understanding of the topic is
demonstrated. The student’s ideas are perceptively
explored. The literary example is related effectively
to the student’s ideas. Support is precise and
effective.
Proficient (Pf)
A well-considered understanding of the topic is
demonstrated. The student’s ideas are thoughtfully
explored. The literary example is related
competently to the student’s ideas. Support is
specific and relevant.
Satisfactory (S) A defensible understanding of the topic is
demonstrated. The student’s ideas are appropriately
and straightforwardly explored. The literary
example is related adequately to the student’s ideas.
Support is relevant but tends to be general.
Limited (L)
An understanding of the topic may be evident but is
only partially demonstrated or is not always
defensible or sustained. The student’s ideas may be
incompletely or unclearly explored. The literary
example is lacking or does not relate adequately to
the student’s ideas. Support may be deficient,
vague, redundant, or marginally relevant.
Poor (P)
An implausible conjecture concerning the topic
may be suggested. The student’s ideas, if present,
are irrelevant, incomprehensible, or unexplored.
The literary example is absent or unrelated to the
student’s ideas. Support, if present, is
overgeneralized or of questionable relevance.
Insufficient
(INS)
• The marker can discern no evidence of an attempt
to fulfill the assignment or
• The writing is so deficient in length that it is not
possible to assess Thought and Support.
57
Scoring Categories and
Scoring Criteria for
2008–2009
Assignment II:
Literary Exploration
(continued)
Form and Structure (5% of total examination mark)
Cross-reference to the Program of Studies for Senior High
School English Language Arts 2.2 3.1 4.1 4.2
When marking Form and Structure, the marker should
consider how effectively the student’s organizational choices
result in
• the development and maintenance of a controlling idea or
unifying effect
• the creation of a coherent, shaped, and concluded
discussion in response to the assignment
Excellent (E)
A focused controlling idea or unifying
effect is skillfully sustained throughout the
response. Development of ideas and
explanations is smooth and coherent. The
response flows to an effective closure.
Proficient (Pf)
A controlling idea or unifying effect is
sustained throughout the response.
Development of ideas and explanations is
coherent. The response moves to an
appropriate closure.
Satisfactory (S) A controlling idea or unifying effect is
evident, but unity may falter on occasion.
Development of ideas and explanations is
generally clear and coherent. The response
moves to a functional closure.
Limited (L)
A controlling idea or unifying effect may
be evident, but the response lacks unity.
Development of ideas and explanations is
uncertain, inadequate, or incoherent. The
response may not arrive at an appropriate
closure.
Poor (P)
A controlling idea or unifying effect is
absent. Development of ideas and
explanations is unclear and ineffective. The
response closes ineffectively.
58
Scoring Categories and
Scoring Criteria for
2008–2009
Assignment II:
Literary Exploration
Matters of Choice (5% of total examination mark)
Cross-reference to the Program of Studies for Senior High
School English Language Arts 4.2
When marking Matters of Choice, the marker should
consider how effectively the student’s choices enhance
communication. The marker should consider
• diction, including connotative language, imagery, idiomatic
expressions, and dialect
• syntax, including such choices as parallelism, balance,
inversion, sentence length, and variety
• the contribution of stylistic choices to the creation of voice
Excellent (E)
Diction is precise and effective. Many
sentences have been successfully structured
for effect and are sometimes polished.
Stylistic choices contribute to the creation
of a convincing voice.
Proficient (Pf)
Diction is specific and generally effective.
Many sentences appear to have been
purposefully structured for effect. Stylistic
choices contribute to the creation of a
competent voice.
Satisfactory (S) Diction is appropriate but may be general
rather than specific. Sentence structures are
generally straightforward and clear.
Stylistic choices contribute to the creation
of a clear voice.
Limited (L)
Diction is imprecise and/or inappropriate.
Sentence structures are frequently
ineffective and/or awkward. Inadequate
stylistic choices contribute to the creation
of an uncertain or unclear voice.
Poor (P)
Diction is inaccurate and/or
overgeneralized. Sentence structures are
misused to such an extent that clarity
suffers. A lack of stylistic choices
contributes to the creation of an ineffective
voice.
59
Scoring Categories and
Scoring Criteria for
2008–2009
Assignment II:
Literary Exploration
Matters of Correctness (5% of total examination mark)
Cross-reference to the Program of Studies for Senior High
School English Language Arts 4.2
When marking Matters of Correctness, the marker should
consider the correctness of
• sentence construction (completeness, consistency,
subordination, coordination, predication)
• usage (accurate use of words according to convention and
meaning)
• grammar (subject-verb/pronoun-antecedent agreement,
pronoun reference, consistency of tense)
• mechanics (punctuation, spelling, capitalization)
Consider the proportion of error in terms of the complexity
and length of the response.
Excellent (E)
This writing demonstrates confident control of
correct sentence construction, usage, grammar,
and mechanics. The relative absence of error is
impressive considering the complexity of the
response and the circumstances.
Proficient (Pf)
This writing demonstrates competent control
of correct sentence construction, usage,
grammar, and mechanics. Minor errors in
mechanics, grammar, and/or complex
language structures are understandable
considering the circumstances.
Satisfactory (S) This writing demonstrates control of the basics
of correct sentence construction, usage,
grammar, and mechanics. There may be
occasional lapses in control of sentence
construction and usage, and/or minor errors in
grammar and mechanics. The communication,
however, is clear.
Limited (L)
This writing demonstrates faltering control of
correct sentence construction, usage, grammar,
and mechanics. The range of sentence
construction problems and errors in usage,
grammar, and/or mechanics blur the clarity of
communication.
Poor (P)
This writing demonstrates lack of control of
correct sentence construction, usage, grammar,
and mechanics. The unclear and incorrect
sentence constructions and jarring errors in
usage, grammar, and mechanics impede
communication.
60
Scoring Categories and
Scoring Criteria for
2008–2009
Assignment III:
Persuasive Writing in
Context
Thought and Support (10% of total examination mark)
Cross-reference to the Program of Studies for Senior High
School English Language Arts 2.1 2.2 2.3 4.1 4.2
When marking Thought and Support, the marker should consider
• how effectively the student has addressed the significance and
complexity of the issue
• the persuasiveness and consistency of the argument(s) presented
• how well the supporting evidence is integrated, synthesized, and/
or developed to support the student’s arguments
• awareness of audience and effectiveness of voice
Excellent (E)
A perceptive and thorough understanding of the
issue is demonstrated. The student’s arguments
are adept and convincing. Support is well defined
and purposefully chosen to reinforce the student’s
ideas in a deliberate and judicious way. A precise
awareness of audience is effectively sustained.
Proficient (Pf)
A thoughtful and competent understanding of the
issue is demonstrated. The student’s arguments
are well considered and sound. Support is
accurate and occasionally purposefully chosen to
reinforce the student’s ideas in a logical and clear
way. Awareness of audience is sustained.
Satisfactory (S) A sufficient but generalized understanding of the
issue is demonstrated. The student’s arguments
are appropriate and straightforward. Support is
relevant but general, and may be occasionally
lacking in persuasiveness and consistency.
Awareness of audience is generally sustained.
Limited (L)
An incomplete, vague, or confused understanding
of the issue is demonstrated. The student’s
arguments are oversimplified and/or inconsistent.
Support is superficial, unclear, contradictory,
inappropriate, or merely a restatement of what is
provided in the examination. Awareness of
audience may be apparent but is not sustained.
Poor (P)
An inaccurate or minimal understanding of the
issue is demonstrated. The student’s arguments
are of questionable logic or are unrelated to the
issue under discussion. Support is irrelevant,
overgeneralized, or lacking. Little awareness of
audience is apparent.
Insufficient
(INS)
• The marker can discern no evidence of an
attempt to fulfill the assignment or
• The writing is so deficient in length that it is not
possible to assess Thought and Support.
61
Scoring Categories and
Scoring Criteria for
2008–2009
Assignment III:
Persuasive Writing in
Context
Writing Skills (5% of total examination mark)
Cross-reference to the Program of Studies for Senior High
School English Language Arts 4.2
When marking Writing Skills, the marker should consider
the extent to which the writing demonstrates control of
•
•
•
•
syntax
diction
grammar
mechanics
Consider the proportion of error in terms of the
complexity and length of the response.
Excellent (E)
The selection and use of words and
structures are effective. This writing
demonstrates confident control of correct
sentence construction, usage, grammar, and
mechanics.
Proficient (Pf)
The selection and use of words and
structures are frequently effective. This
writing demonstrates competent control of
correct sentence construction, usage,
grammar, and mechanics.
Satisfactory (S) The selection and use of words and
structures are occasionally effective. This
writing demonstrates basic control of
correct sentence construction, usage,
grammar, and mechanics.
Limited (L)
The selection and use of words and
structures are frequently ineffective. This
writing demonstrates faltering control of
correct sentence construction, usage,
grammar, and mechanics.
Poor (P)
The selection and use of words and
structures are ineffective. This writing
demonstrates lack of control of correct
sentence construction, usage, grammar, and
mechanics.
62
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