4 Writing 4.1 LEARNING OUTCOMES In this section you will: • consider how to practise the necessary skills for essay writing in the exam • learn how to maximise your grade. Writing practice Crafting your essay Paper 2 of the English B examination requires you to write your answer in essay form. This means that the examiner expects a piece of writing that demonstrates a smooth flow and is written with an excellent level of grammar and well-developed paragraphs. Questions on the exam paper will no longer be broken up into sections labelled a, b, c, but there will be guidance regarding what you are expected to include in your essay. Here is a sample of the new type of exam questions. EXAM TIPS • Ensure you follow th e instructions to choose one question from each section. • Read the question carefully, making sure you understand what is required. • Check that you have answered each part of th e question. ‘A dominant theme in Ti-Jean and His Brothers is good versus evil.’ Write an essay in which you describe TWO incidents in which the conflict between good and evil is presented. In this essay, you must also discuss how the MAIN characters are affected in ONE of the incidents, and examine ONE technique that Walcott uses to present the theme of good versus evil in the play. Your essay needs three parts: an introduction body (usually of three or more paragraphs) a conclusion. Let’s start with the body: Body of essay Follow these steps. EXAM TIPS • Be guided by the mark allocation when considering how much time you spend on each section. • Read over your respo nse to correct any obvious errors. • Write on alternate lin es if you tend to make a lot of corrections.This way your work will sti ll be legible if you have crossed out or added an y additional ideas. 180 First, turn the exam question into a ‘to do’ list to remind you to deal with each part of the question: I must describe TWO incidents in which the conflict between good and evil is presented. I must discuss how the MAIN characters are affected in ONE of the incidents. I must examine ONE technique that Walcott uses to present the theme of good versus evil. As you see, you now have guidelines for your three body paragraphs. Introduction You may use the exam question to guide you as you craft your introduction. Look again at the exam question, and you will come up with something like this: In his play Ti-Jean and his Brothers, Walcott dramatises the eternal conflict between good and evil. Several incidents are sparked by this conflict, and all of the main characters are swept up in it. Walcott uses folk tale, West Indian history, the supernatural, setting, contrasting characters, symbolism (choose ONE) to present this key theme. Conclusion It is always helpful, when you write an essay, to pause when you get to the end of the body section and ask yourself, “So what? What have I really learnt? Where was all that leading up to?” If you ask these questions, you will come up with a conclusion that goes something like this: Using the technique of (choose ONE technique), Walcott explores how all of his characters are caught up in the struggle between good and evil. Despite their losses, Ti-Jean and the Bolom are victorious, but the Devil will doubtless return another day, in another situation, and the struggle will go on. Avoid storytelling The questions in the exam are always phrased in a way that requires you to analyse the work. Retelling the story (this happened and then this, and then this …) will earn you some marks, but not enough to gain you a pass grade. If you find that you are sliding into storytelling (if you are using the words when, then, before, after frequently) it is a good idea to stop writing and check the question again. Are you sure you are answering the question that was asked, or have you got carried away? Present your evidence The body of the essay is the place to bring in all the supporting details. Indeed, writing about literature is like being a lawyer and bringing your evidence to prove your case. Whenever you make a statement about the work or about a character, ensure that you present a couple of bits of evidence in support of that statement. Get into the habit, in class discussions, of shaping your comments like this: What two bits of evidence would you insert here, for instance? Check the length We suggest you aim to write no fewer than 450 words for each essay. If you are not managing to write that much, check: EXAM TIPS • Keep an eye on the tim e. In a 2-hour exam with three essays to write, you have, say, 35 minutes per essay, with 15 minutes left over to think about the answers and to read through your work. • Do not spend more th an 35 minutes on any question. Move on to th e next question, leaving space so that you can come back and finish off if you have time. EXAM TIPS • During the months leading up to the exam , practise writing examtype essays within the time limit given. • Try not to get distrac ted by your classmates. • In the exam room, do not waste time trying to erase neatly: just cross out the wrong word/ paragraph and continue writing. Laetitia is a kind, helpful girl. We know this because … and because … • that you have answered all parts of the question • that you have supplied evidence in support of your points. 181 4.2 LEARNING OUTCOMES In this section you will: • practise two methods of writing a comparative essay • acquire some link words and sentence patterns for making comparisons. A Structuring a comparative essay In your English B examination, two of the questions require you to make a comparison: the question on poetry and the question on short stories. Before comparing poems or stories, let us look at comparisons in general. Here are two examples: Dogs make wonderful pets, but not cats. A dog will come for a walk with you and help with your exercise programme. Ever a faithful friend, he will curl up next to you as you enjoy your favourite TV show. Cats, on the other hand, are too independent to make good companions. If a cat comes around your legs, he is not being friendly – merely marking his territory. He washes and tidies himself – thank you very much! When you want a friend, he will probably be off chasing mice or lizards. So whereas a dog will keep you company, don’t expect that from a cat. B Dogs make wonderful pets, but not cats. Whereas a dog will come for a walk with you and help you with your exercise programme, a cat is much too independent to keep you company. Ever a faithful friend, your dog will curl up next to you as you enjoy your favourite TV show, but if a cat comes around you, he is not being friendly – merely marking his territory. Bathing and brushing your dog is a splendid way to spend a Saturday morning, but that independent cat washes and tidies himself – thank you very much! While Rover is happy just to be around you, Tibbles will be off chasing mice or lizards. A dog is man’s best friend indeed; but don’t expect friendship from a cat. The divided method and the alternating method Look carefully at the two paragraphs. After the first sentence mentioning both cats and dogs, paragraph A says all there is to be said about dogs, and then switches to talking exclusively about cats. Example A uses the divided method. To use the divided method for your poetry or short story essay you can follow this plan: • Introduction mentioning both poems (or stories) and the theme you plan to focus on • All you have to say about one of the poems/stories • All you have to say about the second poem/story • Conclusion, mentioning both of your poems/stories again and highlighting the similarities and differences that are implicit in your two sections. If one or more of the sections in the exam question ask for a comparison, then you may not be able to use the divided method. Check carefully before you begin to write. 182 Example B uses the alternating method. Here, each statement mentions both cats and dogs. You may choose to write your comparative essay using this alternating method: each time you make a point, you relate it to both poems. Your essay plan will then look like this: • Introduction mentioning both poems/stories, and the theme you plan to focus on • Comparison 1 (for example, both poems, compare life in the West Indies with life in more advanced countries) • Comparison 2 (both poems show how people in the North may be wealthier and more progressive, but they are less free than those in the Caribbean) • Comparison 3 (whereas ‘West Indies, USA’ focuses mainly on the unreal image that America presents of itself, ‘South’ reminds readers that the pursuit of wealth and progress led people of the North to enslave people, bringing great suffering) • Comparison 4 (you can provide this yourself ) • Conclusion, mentioning both poems/stories again, briefly commenting on which poem/story you feel does a better job in persuading you. Both methods are acceptable, but try both and see which you prefer. The divided method relies heavily on the conclusion to bring out the comparisons, while the alternating method does the comparisons as it goes along, so the conclusion can be fairly brief. The alternating method risks being repetitive because you have to remind your reader which of the two poems/stories you are referring to. Try to avoid lengthy repetition: Repetitive style: The speaker in the poem West Indies, USA is… but the speaker in the poem South is… Avoiding repetition: Stewart Brown’s speaker… but Brathwaite’s speaker… We’ve cut down from 17 words to just 6, but the reader can still see which poem is being referred to. Useful link words Whether you use the divided method or the alternating method for your comparative essay, some link words will make the sentences flow more easily. Here are some words and phrases you can use. Notice that a semicolon is sometimes needed: • Whereas dogs are good companions, cats are unfriendly and independent. • While a cat will wash itself, a dog needs its owner to bathe it. • A dog will play with you in the park; a cat, on the other hand, will leave you and go off to chase birds. • If you go on holiday you will need to find someone to feed your dog for you; a cat, in contrast, will manage to hunt birds or lizards. • Unlike a dog, who is willing to learn tricks for you, a cat will let you know in no uncertain terms that he is no circus performer. Grammar A clause beginning with while or whereas is known as a dependent clause, and it cannot stand alone. ACTIVITY Practise writing sentences containing comparisons. For example, think of two items to compare (cricket and football, or basketball and netball) and write five sentences using the link words and phrases given in this section. While I was left there, looking foolish. (incomplete) Sita sashayed out of the room while I was left there, looking foolish. (complete) Whereas the speaker in Dreaming Black Boy is just a child. (incomplete) The speaker in Once Upon a Time is a father talking to his son, whereas the speaker in Dreaming Black Boy is just a child. (complete) 183 4.3 LEARNING OUTCOMES In this section you will: • learn to select appropriate poems and focus on the chosen theme • explore how to structure each paragraph of an exam-type essay response • consider how to introduce pertinent quotations. A sample essay comparing two poems 1 Approach the question Always check the marks allotted for each question and try to approach the answer logically. For example, the examiner does not want you to spend all your time on the meaning of the poem, so be prepared to write about its poetic techniques and the message. Unless the instructions direct you otherwise, discussion of two poetic devices per poem is a good rule of thumb. You need to identify the device and then comment as fully as you can on the effect achieved by that device. Try to find different devices in the two poems: if in analysing one poem you have demonstrated that you understand personification, select a different device (unless, of course, the question asks you to focus on the use of personification) for the second poem. KEY POINTS ACTIVITY • Select one of the themes in section 3.26, and choose two poems that best deal with that theme. In note form, jot down the similarities (e.g. both poems focus on war; both poems see war as being wasteful and wrecking lives), and then jot down the differences (e.g. in one poem the speaker is a soldier on the battlefield, while in the other the speaker is possibly at home with his wife as his country is being taken over by foreign soldiers). • Ask yourself which part of each poem you found most moving. How did it make you feel? Identify the poetic device being used. Now you are ready to write about the effectiveness of those poetic devices. • Practise writing introductory paragraphs and concluding paragraphs, using the models given here. 184 Being able to talk about how the poem makes its impact on you is more important than being able to re-tell what goes on in the poem. EXAM TIP When asked to ‘commen t on the effectiveness’ of a literary device you shou ld: • Ask yourself who the device is having an eff ect on. In a poem/novel, it will have an effect on the reader. In a play, it will have an effect on the audience. • Think about the effect in two ways: the device will affect how the reader/audience thinks and feels. • Think about the contri bution made by the de vice to the overall purpose of the wr iter, causing us to feel or think the same about the topic. This is how you will ea rn full marks: In the poem ‘Once Upon a Time’, the father uses a simile when he says th at his face in the mirror is ‘like a snake’s bare fangs’. The simile makes the rea der feel shocked that the father thinks he is evil and da ngerous like a snake, so sympathy is evoked. The reader wi ll think that the father is truly repulsed by the person he has become. The question Select TWO poems in which cruelty takes place. a Outline the situation in which cruelty takes place. b Show how, in EACH poem, the choice of speaker affects the reader’s response to the situation. c Compare and contrast the nature of cruelty in these two poems. Work through the following guidelines step by step. Getting started • If, as here, the question allows you to choose your two poems, make sure your choices are on the syllabus and that they suit the requirements of the question. • Note the main similarities and differences in your poems before you begin to write. • Choose the poetic devices you intend to discuss (unless the device is identified for you in the question as it is here). Introduction • Name both poems and poets. • State the shared theme and the major difference in how the theme is handled. • In one sentence, indicate what else your essay will touch on (you can see this from the question itself ). The poems ‘My Parents’ by Stephen Spender and ‘A Stone’s Throw’ by Elma Mitchell both focus on the cruelty that human beings are capable of. Spender’s poem looks at cruel bullying by children, and Mitchell’s considers the cruelty of religious extremists. The speakers’ point of view is important in both poems, and each poem teaches us something about the nature of bullying. EXAM TIP As you are writing, ch eck the question from time to time to make sure you are still on topic. Names of both poems and both poets Mention shared theme and major difference in how it is handled With reference to the question, indicate what else your essay will touch on Situation Remind your readers of the situation in the poem, but try to be concise. Use your summary to focus on the theme. The little boy who speaks to us in Spender’s poems is being bullied by kids in the area. He seems to be better off than the children around. He refers to them as being ‘rough’ and wearing torn clothes. They mock his lisp, jump out at him to scare him, throw mud at him and say spiteful things. The boy fears ‘their jerking hands and their knees tight on [his] arms’. Mitchell’s poem, on the other hand, recounts an incident in the life of Jesus, when Pharisees brought to him a woman caught in the act of adultery, and insisted that she ought to be stoned. The men have roughed her up, bruised her skin and terrorised her. They eagerly anticipate the stoning, the ‘hail of kisses of stone’. Main idea poem 1 Evidence of bullying Further evidence of bullying Quotation inserted Main idea (poem 2) Evidence of bullying Quotation inserted Further evidence of bullying 185 4.4 LEARNING OUTCOMES In this section you will: • learn to select appropriate poems and focus on the chosen theme • explore how to structure each paragraph of an exam-type essay response • consider how to introduce pertinent quotations. Naming speaker (poem 1) Example of effectiveness Additional example of effectiveness Naming speaker (poem 2) Example of effectiveness Additional example of effectiveness A sample essay comparing two poems 2 Devices and effectiveness Be prepared to discuss two devices per poem. Usually, though, the question will only ask you to discuss just one. Discussion of device: point of view of speaker Spender allows the boy victim to tell his own story. This is effective because he not only tells us about the actions of the other children, but also about his own feelings towards them. He speaks of their strong arms holding him down, their spiteful taunts, their mockery and the way they spring out at him, barking like dogs. However, he also shows us how he would love to be with them, wading in the streams, climbing on the cliffs. Even as they throw mud at him, he says he looked the other way, ‘pretending to smile’. He ‘longed to forgive them’, but couldn’t find a way to be accepted. We feel sorry for him that he has to suffer at the hands of the bullies, but we are still more moved when we discover that he is lonely and longs to be friends. In contrast, Mitchell does not allow the victim to speak, but lets one of her tormentors tell the story. The effect is startling. We understand that the man is a religious leader, yet his choice of words tells us that he is lusting after the woman himself. He admits that they had ‘roughed her up’, but justifies himself by saying it was not the first time she had ‘felt men’s hands/ Greedy over her body’. He speaks of ‘love bites’, ‘kisses of stone’, and ‘frigid rape’, so we are shocked to discover his secret ungodly thoughts. Compare and contrast Identify both similarities and differences. Example of difference Example of difference Similarity 1 Similarity 2 Similarity 3 186 A comparison shows key differences in the poems. Spender shows us children while Mitchell shows us adults. In ‘My Parents’, the cause of cruelty is class difference whereas the reason for victimising the woman is religious extremism. However, there are important similarities. In both cases a mob gangs up against an individual. Both individuals are weak, helpless and terrified. In both cases the victim goes against the rules of the mob: the boy speaks well and wears good clothes and the woman offends the Pharisees by committing adultery. In both cases, too, there is envy: the poor children envy what the victim has, and the religious men envy the sexual enjoyment of the woman. Similarity 4 Conclusion This can be brief since we have already done a comparison in the previous paragraph. Together, the two poems reach to the heart of what makes human beings cruel to one another – both children and adults. Selecting suitable quotations When studying a text you enjoy, it is sometimes tempting to memorise particular speeches and the scenes that are most appealing to you. Although that might be enjoyable, it is not the most beneficial use of your revision time and you should choose the quotations that will effectively illustrate a key point in the poem’s themes or techniques. In revising ‘Orchids’, for example, you might make a note of suitable quotes for use in the exam such as the following: • Orchids are strangely attractive: ‘purple petals draw you/ to look at the purple heart.’ • Orchids are a metaphor for poems: ‘press them between the pages of memory’; ‘their peculiar poetry’. Similarly, in revising ‘West Indies, USA’, you might list these quotes along with their purpose: • Similes: ‘like dice tossed on a casino’s baize’; ‘San Juan glitters like a maverick’s gold ring’ (showing the wealth of Puerto Rico) • Ironic contrast: ‘polished Cadillacs shimmying past Rastas with pushcarts’ (showing poverty alongside the wealth) • Irony in the phrase ‘that vaunted sanctuary...give me your poor’ in the context of the tight security (showing the hypocrisy). Sometimes the image may be too lengthy to quote in its entirety, in this case you can refer to it as follows: Using the image of a smashed TV set, Brown asserts that behind the glamorous image that the USA presents, lies a tangled mess that is ‘sharp and jagged and dangerous, and belonged to someone else’ (showing that the reality is far removed from the image). ACTIVITY Select two or three relevant quotations from each of the poems you are studying. Write them down and once you have memorised them make notes alongside detailing what key point each quotation illustrates (either a theme or a device). 187 4.5 Introducing quotations and revision tips LEARNING OUTCOMES Quotations In this section you will: It is always good to be able to introduce appropriate quotations in your answer. Here are some guidelines: • learn when and how quotations are most effectively used. • Keep each quotation as brief as possible. For example, a two- or threeword quotation aptly chosen can be very effective. • Avoid beginning the sentence with the quotation. It is better to put the quotation at the end. Quotation awkwardly placed at beginning of sentence ‘The mountains pose for him/ In a family group’ – personification – tells us how still and dignified the mountains seem. (poorly expressed) Quotation placed after writer’s comment The speaker impresses us with the stillness and dignity of the mountains by personifying them: ‘The mountains pose for him/ In a family group’. (nicely expressed) • You may find that you need two sentences to deal fully with a quotation: Add a second sentence to deal fully with a quotation Short quote in the middle of the sentence EXAM TIP Here is a handy rule for inserting quotations: Statement + Quotatio n + Full stop (as in the second example). The speaker in Olive Senior’s poem relates how in birdshooting season, the men ‘make marriages with their guns’. The startling metaphor suggests an intimate relationship between man and gun, disturbing to us because it is so abnormal and a betrayal of human relationships. • A very short quote can fit comfortably in the middle of the sentence: By using the oxymorons ‘festival of guns, carnival of misery’, Martin Carter shows us the joy of Caribbean life (its festivals and carnivals) being invaded by violence and tragedy (guns and misery). The invasive nature of the military presence is effectively communicated. Annotations and keeping a journal If you are permitted to underline important sections in your texts, those underlined passages will help you as you revise. Otherwise you may prefer to keep a journal as you study, noting down summaries and useful quotations for reference. Each of the genres requires its own approach. Here we remind you of what to focus on in each genre as you revise. 188 Drama specifics To prepare for the exam, you should be familiar with the plot, the conflicts among the characters and the themes that the playwright is dealing with. You should be aware of the ironies in the play, the way language is used, and the way contrasts serve to make a point clear. Make sure you can talk about the suspense, too. Be prepared to write about the dramatic devices. These include the scenery, props, lighting, sound, spectacle and action (everything that is to be found in the stage directions). In Ti-Jean and His Brothers, for instance, additional devices are the use of masks, talking animals, the quarto band, and the breaking down of the fourth wall so that actors can talk directly to the audience. In Anansi, too, the magical animal kingdom comes alive, side-by-side with the realistic world, and again the fourth wall is broken as actors speak to the audience directly. EXAM TIP You will not receive mar ks for writing about a poem or story that is not on the syllabus, so be very careful as you revise th at you know exactly which texts you may use. Remember that you should not only be able to identify these devices and give examples; you will also need to comment on the impact they have on the audience. Poetry specifics Only a fraction of the marks will be awarded for your summary of the situation in the poem. Make sure that for each poem you can discuss in detail no less than two poetic devices. In particular, you need to show how these devices are connected to the theme and what effect they produce in the reader. Remember, too, that the choice of speaker is often so important that it forms part of the question. Prose specifics Stories and novels are about people and the conflicts in their lives. Be sure you can write about the personality of the main character(s), their struggles, the obstacles they encounter and the outcome of those struggles. Be sure you can identify the themes and that you can show, from the happenings in the novels, what the writer is saying about those themes. Again, be prepared to comment on the choice of narrator — especially to say why a child narrator can be very effective. EXAM TIPS • Work through questio ns from past exam papers . • Learn very short but effective quotations to use in the exam. Prepare your evidence As you prepare for the exam, imagine that you are a lawyer going to court. Imagine you are preparing your evidence. By now you will know the main themes of the play, the novel and the poem, and you can make a pretty good guess regarding what the questions will be about. So you need to have your examples and short quotations ready to prove what you are going to say. Enjoy your Literature course! All your CSEC subjects can be tremendously interesting. Literature is especially so because literature is about life and can therefore reflect some of your own experiences. As you study your English B texts, you will find yourself thinking about your own life, your society and the world we live in. You may be very moved by what you read and you may remember some of these characters and quotations for the rest of your life. EXAM TIP As you revise, select tw o or three devices for each poem, and make sure you can say how each contributes to the effect of the poem and helps communicate its them e. 189
