crazy helpful!
V
50 LESSONS
IN YOUR
FIRST YEAR
OF BUSINESS
THE ULTIMATE GUIDE TO YOUR FIRST YEAR OF
RUNNING YOUR ONLINE COACHING BUSINESS
BY VANESSA LAU
A LETTER TO YOU
(READ THIS BEFORE YOU DIVE IN)
Dear Boss,
I wrote this handbook to detail the top 50 things I’ve kept track of during my first
year of running my coaching business. I’ve definitely learned a lot during the past
year and I’m grateful for all the things I did RIGHT... but also the many things I
could have improved on. This handbook you’re reading is honestly something I
wish the Vanessa a year ago had.
Fortunately, you’re in a perfect position to learn from my mistakes and also take
all of my best practices when it comes to running a successful and streamlined
coaching business.You’ll notice I split the lessons in key categories: Working
with Clients, Business Operations, and Business Relationships.
Some categories have A LOT of lessons,
and others have less. This is just the
nature of the biggest growth points I
faced and that I think will serve you best.
Don’t worry, you’ll still get 50 lessons in
total.
Now if there’s one thing I want you to
take from reading this handbook is
that everyone makes mistakes. I feel like
on paper, it’s so easy to look at everyone
who’s making money and assume that
they have the magic key to success. The
reality is, is that these people you look up
to are just very, very good at NOT giving
up.
© VANESSA LAU INTERNATIONAL INC. | ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
The truth is, everyone you’ve ever looked up to in the industry got to where they
are thanks to them having enough self-awareness to course correct when things
have gone wrong. Many new coaches don’t do this. Instead, when they see
they’ve made a mistake, they immediately think they are not good enough to be
in the industry – that they’re simply not cut out for it.
Well Boss, if you’re reading this I am telling you that you ARE made out for
this. You just need to be patient with the process and to acknowledge that you
are NEW at this. As with anything you are doing for the FIRST time... you need to
FORGIVE yourself and instead be EXCITED about the potential you have ahead
of you.
This was the number 1 lesson above all that I learned in my first year.
Forgiveness.
I wish I hadn’t been so hard on myself and I wish I didn’t CHOOSE to force
imposter syndrome on myself simply because I had crazy expectations of what
type of coach I SHOULD be.
I SHOULD get my clients their first 10k months within 2 weeks of working with
me.
I SHOULD be able to get EVERY client I work with results.
I SHOULD have TONS of screenshots and testimonials of clients earning 30k after
2 weeks.
LOL.
Man oh man was I delusional.
© VANESSA LAU INTERNATIONAL INC. | ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
That’s why if you are FORCING these wild expectations on yourself, especially as
a NEW coach, who is CLEARLY still trying to get the hang of things (meaning you
are not only trying your best to help your clients succeed, but you are also
learning more about YOURSELF)… then you are only making your first year harder
than it has to be.
I promise you that within your first year of running your coaching business you
will learn A LOT. And yes, there WILL be times that you doubt yourself – but who
doesn’t? The most important thing to know is that you need to keep going.
You have a gift.
You have a story.
You have something that NEEDS to be shared.
And there are HUNDREDS if not THOUSANDS of people out there who need your
help.
So Boss... As you read this handbook and as I lay out the 50 things I learned, I
want to you to just OBSERVE the information and not use it to determine your
self-worth and value as a coach. If you realize you’ve made some mistakes...
great, you’re in good company.
The lessons here wouldn’t be here if I didn’t make the same mistake. If you don’t
AGREE with my lessons, then hey – everyone's journey is different. Take what
makes you pause and think, and forget what makes you shake your head in
disbelief. It’s that simple.
© VANESSA LAU INTERNATIONAL INC. | ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
Oh, and me!
I'm Vanessa Lau. When I wrote this guide, I had just finished my first year of business
and I wanted to share everything I learned with others (psst.. I'm so glad I did!).
Today, I'm a multiple 7 figure online entrepreneur and founder of The BOSSGRAM
Academy®. I specialize in helping new coaches and consultants build their businesses
from the ground up, leverage Instagram, and turn their followers into clients.
Within 1 year, I made $500K, and in my second year, I made $2.7M in revenue.
Talk about mind blowing.
I achieved my wildest dreams in just 2 years, and I'm so excited for you to dive into the
next 50 lessons so you can get a head start in your unique journey.
Are you ready to dive in? Let’s get started.
PS: Make sure you tag me @vanessalau.co in your IG stories if you had any A-HA!
moments while reading this, and may just reshare it! :)
INSTAGRAM | YOUTUBE | WWW.VANESSALAU.CO| @THEBOSSGRAMACADEMY
© VANESSA LAU INTERNATIONAL INC. | ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
WORKING WITH CLIENTS
In this section of the handbook, I am dumping ALL the pointers regarding my
experience of working with clients. As a backstory, when I launched my
business – it was an instant hit.
Why? Because I spent 6 months prior to launching simply giving value and
building an audience without asking for anything in return. Does this mean
you shouldn’t launch your business? Absolutely not
Truthfully, I didn’t launch my business until 6 months after not because of
purely strategic reasons, it was honestly because I didn’t know what the heck I
was doing.
Luckily for me though, it worked out well and I played the long game when it
came to opening up my services to the public. Keep in mind BEFORE my
official launch, I WAS working with free clients (beta testers) for 4 months. So
that was also helpful to prepare me for launching my FULL paid services.
Anyways, when I opened my doors to the public on January 2019 – within 3
months, my coaching program was fully booked. I had a total of 12 clients all
happening at the same time. This created CHAOS. So much chaos I had to
shut down any new applicants and even had to refund people who were on a
waitlist.
As a BRAND SPANKIN’ NEW COACH... taking on 12 clients at the same time
was A LOT. This is why you’ll notice that this section within the handbook is
PACKED with majority of my top lessons – because I learned... A LOT. Good
luck.
© VANESSA LAU INTERNATIONAL INC. | ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
LESSON #1
ASK POWERFUL QUESTIONS INSTEAD OF
PROVIDING THE ANSWER, DON’T BE A
CONSULTANT (IF THAT’S NOT WHAT YOU
REALLY ARE)
It honestly wasn’t until the later part of my 1:1 coaching program when the
harsh reality hit me that I wasn’t really coaching. As I grew in my business and I
myself started to invest in higher level coaching programs, I began to witness
what TRUE coaching is. It isn’t just offering advice to your client. It’s asking
them QUESTIONS. Really – this is what coaching is about. Otherwise, when
you are just providing the answer to your clients, you’re acting more like a
consultant. The truth is, if you ONLY provide the answer to your clients, you’re
causing the following things to happen:
Your clients aren’t actually learning how to coach themselves out of their
own problems
Your clients will be trained to only treat you as a Q&A forum (this creates A
LOT of resentment for you as a coach because duh, it can be mentally
draining to constantly be used as someone’s personal Google)
You’re not setting up your clients for success, meaning they can’t think for
themselves, and they will be virtually useless without you once the program
is over... and therefore they won’t get results
Your clients aren’t really going through any personal breakthroughs or
transformations
As a coach, your goal is to get your clients to come to the answers themselves.
Even if this means having a couple of awkward silences. Being a coach is
actually VERY hard and requires A LOT of patience. Most importantly, it also
requires you to be a great listener and to help the client read between the lines
of what’s REALLY going on.
© VANESSA LAU INTERNATIONAL INC. | ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
If you need more guidance on how to ask powerful questions, I
recommend this book to get you on the right foot (Yes, that’s an affiliate link
if you’d to thank me for the recommendation – I would appreciate it 😊)
LESSON #2
TRY NOT TO CREATE TOO MANY
CUSTOM PACKAGES FOR CLIENTS
Having ONE streamlined program will SAVE you not only a lot of headache,
but it will also set you up to create a scaleable system. If you keep doing
custom packages for your clients (meaning Client A gets
a Youtube service, then Client B gets a Website service), this is what
happens: You don’t refine your signature framework/process, meaning
you’re so tied up with custom packages that you aren’t necessarily
perfecting the ONE thing you want to be known for.
If you have a lot of clients, it will be SO hard to keep track of. I wanted to
make my clients feel special by doing some custom packages, meaning
not ALL the sessions were the same for every client. This means when I got
to a place where I had A LOT of clients, I would literally hop on calls
FORGETTING which custom package I gave. It was really embarrassing.
If your positioning is good and your application process is good,
GENERALLY you’ll be attracting the SAME type of client. If you find
yourself attracting a lot of different clients with various needs that require
you to create different packages... I would re-look at your
positioning cause that DEFINITELY shouldn’t be happening if your
positioning is on point.
New for Q1
© VANESSA LAU INTERNATIONAL INC. | ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
When you have a proven SYSTEM that can be replicated for a
PARTICULAR TYPE of client, it’s going to help you A LOT to scale that
system into group coaching and courses... things that reach a more mass
market.
LESSON #3
HAVE A CLEAR PROGRAM OUTLINE, AND
STICK TO IT (DON’T LET YOUR CLIENTS
BOOK YOU “WHENEVER THEY’RE READY”)
A big mistake I made was being way too chill with my clients. I offered 8
sessions for my coaching program and it ended up taking some clients 6
months to complete it. I offered this program for $2,000 - $3,000. That is
VERY little compensation for 6 months of work.
WHAT WENT WRONG?
I was WAY too lenient to my clients. This meant that I wasn’t strict on the
timelines of my program. I didn’t instruct my clients from the get-go that
they MUST book me ONCE a week and instead I told them to book me
whenever they felt ready to (because I THOUGHT I was doing them a
favour by giving them enough time to finish the homework and action
steps I provided them after each session). This was a BIG mistake
because this made clients feel like they could take as long as they
wanted to complete their tasks, and therefore this would delay their
RESULTS. This would also cause them to LOSE MOMENTUM. Obviously,
this actually wasn’t doing any GOOD for the client, and it also created a
massively negative impact on MY BUSINESS.
New for Q1
© VANESSA LAU INTERNATIONAL INC. | ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
HOW?
Since I couldn’t anticipate WHEN each client would be finished, I couldn’t
let NEW clients in (since I was so booked up). This meant I had a MASSIVE
bottleneck in my business because I couldn’t anticipate when my existing
clients would FINISH so I could welcome NEW clients and ensure I could
anticipate when I should expect cashflow to be injected in the business.
Long story short – put a timeline to your program (ie: You MUST finish in
3 months with weekly or bi-weekly calls, no exceptions.)
LESSON #4
CREATE A ROADMAP TO SHARE BEFORE
YOU START SO IT’S CLEAR ON WHAT IS
EXPECTED AND COVERED IN EACH
SESSION
What I liked to do for my 1:1 clients before we start working together is to
ask them to fill out a more in-depth questionnaire so I can get to know
them better beyond just the information collected in the application form
and discovery call.
After I collect this information, I put together a roadmap that clearly
outlines what we will be covering in each session. Keep in mind that since
it is a signature program, the outline looks the same to every client,
HOWEVER I tweak the verbiage to link back on how the session would
directly relate to their current situation.
New for Q1
© VANESSA LAU INTERNATIONAL INC. | ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
This means that even though the program isn’t technically custom, it
FEELS custom because the plan is a bit more personalized to the
specific language they used in their questionnaire. I then book an
onboarding call and I go through the plan step by step to ensure that the
client feels comfortable about the roadmap, expectations are being
communicated clearly, last minute questions are answered, and we also
take the opportunity to break the ice. After that call, we book our official
first session.
LESSON #5
SET UP A MEMBERSHIP PLATFORM TO
HOST YOUR RESOURCES
The amount of time I wasted sharing the same tutorials LIVE on my client
calls is embarrassing. I would literally repeat the same training over and
over again on my client calls. This wasted a lot of time for the client, and it
wasted a lot of MY time too.
Instead, what I WISH I did was open up a membership platform (I
recommend Kajabi) and creating a portal where it’s pretty much like a
course.
Inside this “course”, I would drop ALL the extra resources and
tutorials. Then, I would give ALL my clients access to this portal. This way,
they have EVERYTHING they need at their finger tips, they can play the
videos, and everything is organized an it order.
.
© VANESSA LAU INTERNATIONAL INC. | ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
The best part? I can upload NEW documents anytime and it looks
professional AF. In fact, I could have also added this as a PERK on my
sales page to convert my clients. THIS is what I WISH I did. It would have
made my program SO MUCH MORE pristine and it would have saved me
SO MUCH more time AND increased the perceived value of my program.
LESSON #6
HAVE A SET SCHEDULE FOR CALLS WITH
EACH CLIENT INSTEAD OF USING A
BOOKING LINK
To combat Lesson #3, something I wish I did instead of WAITING for my
clients to book me and to do the whole back-and-forth of availabilities, is
from the get-go to AGREE with your client on which day of the week and
which time you want to commit to meeting moving forward (ie: Every
Monday at 12pm I meet Client A, and Every Tuesday 3pm I meet Client C).
That means that you can remove the whole back and forth process of
booking calls, and you AND your client can anticipate when your calls
are, every week.
LESSON #7
GET YOUR CLIENTS TO BOOK THE NEXT
CALL BEFORE THEY HOP OFF THE CALL
If you’re a coach that struggles to get clients to book you CONSISTENTLY
for your calls (and you can’t get a client to commit to meeting you the same
day every week or other week), a secret weapon is BEFORE you finish
your call with them, ask them when their next availability is and book it
directly on the call. This ensures the client is locked in for the next time
you see each other.
© VANESSA LAU INTERNATIONAL INC. | ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
LESSON #8
DON’T BOOK YOURSELF BACK TO BACK
WITH CLIENTS
I know you want to please your clients by appearing flexible... but please
don’t kill yourself by booking 3 clients back to back in a single day. I used to
do this ALL the time and it would leave my exhausted and drained. Ensure
you are creating time blocks between clients so you can ensure you’re
EATING, going on BATHROOM BREAKS, and RESTING between calls.
LESSON #9
HAVE AN AGENDA SO YOUR SESSIONS
DON’T GO OFF-TRACK
Before you hop on a call with your client, prepare some notes on what you’d
like to cover. This ensures you’re maximizing your time together and
more importantly; you are staying on track.
Specifically, what I do is I have a notebook and I write down
Client Name.
Session #
Things to Follow Up On (Questions I have for the client or that I want the
client to update me on)
Things to Discuss (Things that we need to go over on the call)
Next steps (Things I’d like my client to work on after the call)
And that’s it!
New for Q1
© VANESSA LAU INTERNATIONAL INC. | ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
LESSON #10
RECORD YOUR CLIENT CALLS
I use the platform called ZOOM for my client calls and I record my calls on
the platform whenever I have my meetings. WHY? Because it’s always
nice to have a copy of the call for your client to look back on... AND it’s
also good to protect yourself. This means if you EVER have a conflict with
your client, you have PROOF via the recordings of your conversation. Not
only this, as you move forward in business, it’s always nice to spot check
your calls and look back on areas you can improve on when it comes to
coaching.
LESSON #11
USE A COMMUNICATION PLATFORM THAT
ALLOWS VOICE NOTES
Texting is great... but sending a voice note is SO MUCH EASIER. Choose a
platform that enables you and your client to send voice notes. I use Slack
(but to be honest, it’s kind of a b*tch to send voice notes through there). A
lot of coaches use Voxer which has super simple voice note capabilities,
like Whatsapp.
LESSON #12
USE WWW.LOOM.COM TO SEND QUICK
VIDEO RECORDINGS TO YOUR CLIENTS
OMG I wish I knew about Loom SOONER in my coaching career. This is
THE BEST. My team and I use it all the time to send quick tutorials and
quick explanations to each other. I WISH I leveraged
tool to
New this
for Q1
communicate with my clients. Check it out. It will be a massive game
changer for your business.
© VANESSA LAU INTERNATIONAL INC. | ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
LESSON #13
WRITE A QUICK DEBRIEF AFTER
EACH SESSION
A best practice I did when I was working with my clients was to have a
recap document where I would type in bullet points the MAIN action
steps my client needs to take and some key takeaways from our call. This
really helped me look back on the last session to prepare myself for the
upcoming sessions. Especially if you are working with A LOT of clients at
the same time, this will be a LIFE SAVER to help remind yourself of what
was previously discussed. It also helps your client keep track as well!
LESSON #14
GIVE ACTIONABLE STEPS TO YOUR
CLIENTS. DON’T OVERWHELM THEM.
A mistake I made was giving my clients too much homework because I
wanted to make them feel that the program was valuable. The problem is,
is that I ended up overwhelming my clients and NOT giving them enough
QUICK WINS.
Making your clients FEEL like they are accomplishing tasks is really
important instead of making them feel like they’re drowning in work and
that they’ll never achieve the results they want.
This means that as a coach, you should give your clients a clear
outline of what to finish before your next call and make sure it’s
actually DOABLE.
© VANESSA LAU INTERNATIONAL INC. | ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
For example: Don’t expect your client to build an entire website in 1 week.
Instead, if you’re teaching your client how to build a website, break the
lessons in multiple sessions and asking your client to complete one step at
a time, instead of jampacking it all.
For Example: Session A – Home Page. Session B – About me Page. Session
C – Sales Page. INSTEAD OF … Session A – The Entire Website.
Get my point?
LESSON #15
GIVE CLEAR DEADLINES FOR CLIENTS TO
DO THE WORK TO AVOID RUSHED LOW
QUALITY WORK
A mistake I made with my clients is that I wasn’t clear on when things were
due. I was not only overwhelming my clients with work, but I didn’t help
them to break up their action items step by step, including approximately
how long it should take them to finish a task.
This doesn’t mean you need to micromanage your clients, but giving
them a heads up of how long they should spend working on a
particular action item is helpful for the client to know whether they are
on or off track.
© VANESSA LAU INTERNATIONAL INC. | ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
LESSON #16
HAVE OFFICE HOURS AND DON’T TAKE
CALLS ON WEEKENDS
Speaking of boundaries, having your own office hours is important.
You’re the expert, not a freelancer and you are definitely not an employee
to your client. That’s why from the get go it’s important to be clear with
your clients on what your office hours look like.
For example, giving your clients notice that you aren’t available on the
weekends and if they submit their work to you on a Friday night, you will
get back to them on Monday morning. Or, letting them know that you are
available between 9 – 5, and if they contact you past 5, you will get back
to them the next morning.
This is important because you don’t want to feel like an employee and
you especially don’t want to be staying up late or spending your
precious weekend doing client work when that is YOUR special time
to either work on your own business OR practice self-care and have
work life balance. Not only this, but setting these expectations it will
ensure your clients get their work done on TIME if they really want you to
review it AND decrease the amount of follow ups because they know you
will get back to them at a certain time frame.
© VANESSA LAU INTERNATIONAL INC. | ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
LESSON #17
HAVE A CLEAR “WHEN I’LL GET BACK
TO YOU” POLICY
Right from the beginning be very clear with your clients on when they
can expect to hear back from you. It’s easy for clients to expect 15
minute responses and feel disappointed when you took 2 days to get
back to them. This is why you need to set boundaries from the
beginning.
For me, I get back to my clients within 48 hours MAX (not including
weekends). Don’t set yourself up for headache by training your clients to
think you’ll get back to them ASAP. You need to give space for your
clients to solve their own problems and respect your boundaries.
This is especially important when you are growing your own
business AND if you are juggling multiple clients at the same time. It’s
easy to get caught up in the “ASAP” mentality when you only have 1
client... but when you’re juggling more than 5 clients at once, promising
“ASAP” responses can be a total disaster.
LESSON #18
SET A TIME TWICE A DAY TO CHECK UP
ON YOUR CLIENTS
For a while I was sporadically checking up on my clients and I was glued
to my computer because I felt I needed to get back to them right away, or
I was worried I missed a message from them. After I learned how to set
boundaries, I was then afraid I wasn’t checking up on them enough. So,
the way I ensure I can respect my own schedule while ensuring my
clients feel supported is to set a daily reminder New
to check
for Q1on my clients
twice a day at set times. Once in the morning, and one more time later in
the afternoon.
© VANESSA LAU INTERNATIONAL INC. | ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
LESSON #19
USE ASANA OR DUBSADO TO KEEP TRACK
OF WHERE EACH CLIENT IS AT (HAVE A
CLIENT MANAGEMENT TRACKER)
When you start working with clients, it can sometimes be incredibly easy to
forget what session they left off at. This is why using a management tool like
Asana, Trello, or Dubsado can help.
Here’s an example:
© VANESSA LAU INTERNATIONAL INC. | ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
LESSON #20
DON’T PROMISE LIFETIME ACCESS TO
YOUR FUTURE PROGRAMS JUST TO MAKE
THE SALE
This is something I THOUGHT I had to do in order to convince clients to work
with me. This is something I saw A LOT of other coaches offering on their
sales page (ie: “If you work with me, you get LIFETIME access to all my future
courses!). Don’t. Do. This. HONESTLY.
This is such a bad idea – you do NOT want to devalue your future programs
like that, just to make $3000. You never know HOW valuable your future
programs can truly be (or how FAST you might grow as a coach), and it
DOESN’T make sense to give a lifetime of offers to your clients JUST because
they paid for ONE of your services.
This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t offer your programs to clients for free (if you
REALLY want to include specific perks in your package)… but don’t promise
ALL your programs! That’s just silly. What if you launch a 10K mastermind in
the future... and your client from MONTHS ago that took your 1:1 program for
$2,000 now demands to be admitted into your 10K mastermind for free. Uh...
you get my point. Don’t promise lifetime access to all your future offers
just because you want to make a quick buck. It’s not a smart business
move.
New for Q1
© VANESSA LAU INTERNATIONAL INC. | ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
LESSON #21
IT’S OK TO BE FRIENDS WITH YOUR
CLIENTS, BUT STAY PROFESSIONAL.
Yes. During your time with your clients you will absolutely LOVE (most) of
them. You’ll love them so much you might even be convinced you’re
going to be friends for life. But I want you to remember this: they are still
your client, and this is a professional relationship. This means: DO NOT
bash other coaches, and DO NOT gossip about other people or other
clients.
WHY? BECAUSE YOU NEED TO PROTECT YOURSELF.
As someone who grew in business REALLY fast and literally turned into a
“public figure” thanks to Youtube... I realize now how fast word can
travel, how what you say can be easily misinterpreted, and how clients
usually move on to working with other coaches.
What this means if although you may have a wonderful "friend"
relationship with your clients today, this relationship could look totally
different a year later.
Remember this: When you sign up to be an online coach, you are also
signing up to have tons of eye balls on you. This means: Don’t do or say
things you’ll later regret in your career, especially to strangers you're
meeting for the first time on the internet. This doesn't just apply to your
clients, but it applies to other coaches you meet through masterminds,
networking, and other events as well!
New for Q1
© VANESSA LAU INTERNATIONAL INC. | ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
LESSON #22
YOUR JOB IS NOT TO MAKE SURE
YOUR CLIENTS LIKE YOU. YOUR JOB IS
TO HELP THEM GET RESULTS
The reason I had very little boundaries in the first place is because I cared
about being liked. I wanted to appear super responsive, super available,
and super LIKEABLE. This is why I felt like I needed to respond to my
clients within 15 minutes of them messaging me or I felt shy to call them
out on their bullsh*t a.k.a “HEY. You DIDN’T do the work.”
But later on I realized that being nice is NOT what my clients hired me for.
They hired me to HELP them... and me trying to be their best friend is NOT
helping them grow their businesses. When I started being more strict,
being more direct, and being SERIOUS about holding my clients
ACCOUNTABLE... this is when my clients started REALLY getting results.
The funny part is that I THOUGHT my clients would be upset with me that I
suddenly started to kick their butts into gear a little bit more, but it turns out
they respected me MORE for it.
New for Q1
© VANESSA LAU INTERNATIONAL INC. | ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
LESSON #23
DON’T CONTINUE PROVIDING
SERVICES IF YOUR CLIENT IS LATE ON A
PAYMENT
I have a friend who continued to coach her client even though her client
was late on her payment plan. My friend was too afraid to speak up and
wanted to give her client “more time”. I think having sympathy and having
a big heart can get you far... but what my friend did wrong was continuing
the service. If the client needs more time to pay? Sure, here’s the deadline
and once you pay, we’ll continue our service. NOT: “Okay, you can pay me
later. You still coming to our coaching call today?”
WHY IS THIS A PROBLEM?
Well, for my poor friend – the client never ended up paying. In fact, she had
missed MULTIPLE payments. And guess what? My friend RESENTED her
client and was SO annoyed. This is not the type of energy you want to call
in. Respect yourself by respecting your service. Don’t coach for free and
make it clear to your client that they need to pay in order to play. This also
ensures the client is respecting your time.
LESSON #24
DON’T DO THE WORK FOR YOUR CLIENTS
It’s tempting to be a people pleaser and to feel like you want to do the work
for your clients. This means: Helping them write their sales pages, doing
competitor research FOR them, asking for their logins and going into the
back end of their website to help them with tech (#guilty).
The truth is, you doing the work for your client doesn’t make you any
different from a freelancer. Stop trading time for money, and instead of
New for
Q1COACH them to
doing the work FOR your clients... do your JOB
and
find the solution and to do the work themselves.
© VANESSA LAU INTERNATIONAL INC. | ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
LESSON #25
DON’T EXPECT ALL YOUR CLIENTS TO
BE ALL-STARS
Honestly... some clients... they just hire coaches for the wrong reason.
Some people honestly think hiring a coach will fix all their problems
without them doing the work.
Is that your fault? No. Is it annoying? Yes.
Do you think ALL coaches have a whole roster of all-star clients? No. To be
honest, AMAZING dream clients come a dime a dozen. If anything, most
coaches have a lot of PITA (pain in the ass) clients than they do DREAM
clients.
Obviously, this is only as strong as your application process and your
filtering process. But let’s be real here: You’re a new coach. And as a new
coach, you’re just happy to take on anyone that trusts you to get them
results. This is why most new coaches get stuck with clients that really
aren’t a good fit, and this is all due to lack of experience. And that’s
OKAY.
Overtime, you’re going to have enough trial and error with some great and
not-so-great clients that you’ll KNOW exactly what makes a good client for
your practice. So, don’t be alarmed that you have some clients that simply
make your job a little tougher than it has to be – we've all been there and
you’re in good company.
As you work with PITA clients, just remember that every client you have is
there to teach you a lesson on how you can get better. Not only this, if you
REALLY have a disaster client on your hands, who’s clearly not valuing
your time, remember to respect yourself to let them go.
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LESSON #26
DON’T BE AFRAID TO LET GO OF CLIENTS
I am NOT afraid to say I’ve fired clients from my practice before.
WHY?
Because they didn’t respect my time as their coach and they didn’t respect
their investment.
WHAT DOES THIS LOOK LIKE?
In my case, it’s when clients DON’T do the work and it’s evident to me that
they hired me for the wrong reasons. Sometimes clients will hire coaches
because they think it's going to be the ultimate magic pill that will solve all
their problems WITHOUT them putting the work.
Remember, this is YOUR business. If you DON’T want to work with
someone who shows up late, doesn’t' show up at all, or doesn’t do the
work to help themselves, it’s OK to tell them: “Hey. It seems to me that we
may not be a good fit to work together. You see, I work with clients who
[insert qualities here], and it seems like you need a coach that will hold your
hand a bit more. Since I'm not the type of coach that does that, I’m afraid
we’ll have to stop our time together.”
Obviously, it’s good to give your clients WARNINGS before letting them go.
But after giving a CLEAR warning (ie: If this behaviour continues, we’ll have
to stop the program), it’s time for you to make the call of whether or not
you want to continue the relationship. If it’s just in the beginning stages, I
generally give the money back. BUT if we’re deep into our relationship, I
do not offer refunds because I've already spend considerable amount of
time with the client and I deserve to be compensated for not just my time,
but my PAID content I’ve already shared. As I mentioned before: You are
the CEO. This is YOUR experience too. Not just your clients.
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LESSON #27
IF YOUR CLIENT WANTS TO TERMINATE
A CONTRACT, MAKE SURE THE
TERMINATION IS IN WRITING AND
SIGNED BY BOTH PARTIES.
II once had a client who decided to go a different path on her
journey 3/4ths of her way into our time together. She realized she wanted
to dive deeper into spirituality and I wasn’t going to be the coach to take
her there.
She had a couple of sessions still left to use up, but she decided to not
continue the sessions because she wanted to start with her new coach
right away.
Since our contract stated she would get 8 sessions total with me, I made
her sign a termination agreement that clearly states we are no longer
working together. This is to protect ME in case down the line she comes
back months later and demands for the remaining sessions.
WHY?
Because my time is valuable and I cannot anticipate how busy I will be
months or even years later. It would make no sense to me to give back the
sessions she decided not to take.
When someone decides to terminate their time with you, it’s important to
protect your business and ensure you get it in writing. Big decisions like
these require safety nets in case your client (or ex client) changes their
mind and decides to come back asking for their remaining sessions with
you.
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LESSON #28
DON’T TRY TO BE EVERYTHING TO
EVERYONE.
To be honest, when my client wanted to terminate the contract with me,
my ego was BRUISED. I felt like because she terminated the contract, I
probably wasn’t a good coach.
But then I realized that she did the RIGHT thing for her business. I am NOT
a spiritual coach, and I likely won’t ever be in the future. It simply isn’t my
style, and it would have been ridiculous for me to change my business
model to please everyone. The fact that she decided to no longer work
with me is NOT my fault, and it’s not hers either.
It’s the equivalent of going to a doctor that specializes in sore throats....
then realizing you actually have a broken knee... so you tell that doctor
you’re going to the knee doctor instead. You're doing what’s in YOUR best
interest, and it really has nothing to do with that doctor.
This experience made me honour my style even more. I know EXACTLY
what type of coach I am. I am process driven. I am strategic. I am
traditional. And I won’t baby you.
Once you truly OWN what type of coach you are, you will attract the
right people, and you will repel the wrong people who aren’t a good fit.
It’s important to stay true to who you are and actually build a BRAND
around yourself instead of trying to be like everyone else. You will have a
stronger peace of mind once you own up WHO YOU ARE vs. WHO YOU
ARE NOT.
New for Q1
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LESSON #29
DON’T TIE YOUR WORTH OR SUCCESS
TO YOUR CLIENT’S RESULTS
Many new coaches get paralyzed in fear because they feel like if they
didn’t get their clients results (ie: 10k months, 50 pounds of weight loss,
XYZ goal here>) then they aren’t cut out to be a coach.
This couldn’t be further from the truth. I’ve worked with A LOT of clients.
Some made money and got paid clients during their time with me, and
some didn’t make a dime. The funny thing is, is that I taught the EXACT
SAME strategies to all clients.
WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?
It means that you can’t control your clients’ willingness and determination
to GET results. I’ve had some clients message me every day, asking
amazing questions, and truly owning the experience. Then I've had other
clients that I didn’t hear back from for WEEKS.
You CANNOT control your clients’ actions. You JUST have to do your
BEST to help them... help themselves.
Want to know another interesting thing that proves you shouldn’t tie your
monetary or numerical results to your clients? The clients that got zero
monetary results, they still thanked me profusely for being their coach.
I had one client where I really felt like I wanted to refund her money
because I felt bad that she didn’t make her investment back. But guess
what? She ended up telling me that hiring me was the best decision she
ever made, and that it was a life changing experience.
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You see, it’s selfish of you to impose a certain idea of results you have onto
your clients. Some clients just needed a mindset transformation. Or some
clients, even if they didn’t get “results”, might have learned INVALUABLE
lessons thanks to you.
So remember Boss, please don’t tie your self-worth to only numerical
results. You’re only making it harder on yourself.
LESSON #30
JUST BECAUSE SOMEONE HAS MONEY,
DOESN’T MEAN YOU SHOULD TAKE
THEM ON AS A CLIENT
You must protect your experience as a business owner. This means
NOT taking everyone one, even if they are willing to pay you.
I once went on a call with a prospect that seemed perfect on paper. He
was EAGER to work with me and was willing to pay me whatever it took to
be mentored by me. The truth is, is his eagerness really turned me off. Not
to mention he was very pushy on the call. This was a huge red flag. If I
couldn’t even stand him on a 30 minute call, how can I expect to stay sane
working with him for the next 3 months!? Despite the fact that he had
money, it was a no for me. Why? Because it’s not worth it. It’s not worth
working with clients you already know are going to be a pain in the
ass. YOU ARE THE BOSS. PROTECT your experience. You don’t want to be
working with clients feeling like it is no different than a 9-5, working with
co-workers that drive you nuts!
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LESSON #31
DON’T COACH YOUR CLIENTS FOR FREE
AFTER THEY’RE DONE WORKING WITH YOU
I was really bad with boundaries when I first started coaching. After a
client was finished their time with me, I felt like they were my best friends.
This meant when they DMed me with a question, I would answer it.
Now if it’s a small question, totally fine. But these were FULL ON
STRATEGY questions. Questions that need at least 15+ minutes of my
time. This is why when you OFF board your clients, let them know the
options they have to continue working with you.
You can:
Put them on an accountability/support program where you meet every
quarter to keep them on track for their goals. This could be a package
price.
Offer them to join your membership program to get continued
coaching from you at a smaller scale.
Tell them that they can contact you for one-off 30-90 minute coaching
calls at a price.
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BUSINESS OPERATIONS
(LOGISTICS, HIRING,
FINANCES)
This section of the handbook talks about all things that keep a business
running. The side that we don’t often think about day-to-day, but are SUPER
important. There are probably tons more I can add to this section, but below
are the lessons that I think may be most relevant to you and that stood out to
me the most in my first year of running my business.
LESSON #32
DON’T OFFER PAYMENT PLANS THAT
EXTEND LONGER THAN THE PROGRAM
A mistake I did when I launched my program The BOSSGRAM Academy for the
first time is that the program itself was 2 months long... but my payment plan
was 6 months long. I made it this long because I wanted to get more sales and
I wanted to make the program seem affordable.
This meant that after all the content was consumed there were some students
that pulled their cards out from the plan and we saw an increase in payment
failures. This is why I have now learned if you are drip-feeding your course, OR
if you are delivering a coaching program LIVE, be sure to not make the
payment plan longer than the time that student or client is spending with you
so you can hold them accountable to honour the rest of the payment plan.
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LESSON #33
DISCOUNTING YOUR PROGRAMS OR
CHARGING CHEAPER PRICES IS NOT A
GOOD IDEA
I intentionally made my program cheaper than what I KNEW deep in my heart
was worth (even though my program is literally worth THOUSANDS) because it
was my first time launching it and I was worried that people wouldn’t be able
to “afford” it. The problem is that when you lower your prices, you are also
lowering the barrier to entry. When the barrier to entry is low, that means
anyone and everyone can join.
This is not a good thing. The lower your prices, you tend to attract people
who are honestly a pain the ass to work with. You attract the people who
are only shopping based on price.
What I noticed is that some of those who did the payment plan were very
difficult to deal with (Keyword: SOME, not all). Meaning they would cancel
their cards, they would ask for refunds (not because the course was bad, but
because they needed money for rent), they would ask if I could help them pay
their bills (Yup. You read that right).
This is why you should really think twice before offering your course for a
cheap price because you’re scared no one will buy. Don’t do that to yourself
and charge enough that will actually make people HONOUR the
investment and put in the work.
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LESSON #34
CHARGE MORE FOR YOUR PAYMENT
PLANS
A mistake I made is that I would always forget to charge more for my
payment plans. When I was on sales calls with prospects, they would ask
me if they could split the payment up. Because I was just so excited to
make the sale, I would say yes and split the full payment in exactly
the amount of months they wanted to pay. This was a mistake because I
would ALWAYS forget to add an additional 10-15% fee.
WHY IS THIS IMPORTANT?
When you split up the payment in multiple transactions, YOU get dinged
transaction fees by Stripe/Paypal. You should account for these fees when
you are doing payment plans. Also, it gives a good incentive for clients to
pay in full once they realize they can save more money by doing so.
LESSON #35
GET A CREDIT CARD WITH THE
CURRENCY YOU GET CHARGED MOST
IN
OMG. This was a massive mistake. I’m Canadian but I charge my services in
USD and ALL of my programs I use charge ME in USD. Guess what? I was
putting all the charges on my CANADIAN credit card... for the entire year.
This meant I was paying for the currency exchange fee, the foreign
transaction fee, and all these other fees that made my expenses 3040% higher than they needed to be (especially cause the exchange
rate was not in my favour). It was awful and it hurt my bottom line like
crazy. Really, really stupid mistake.
New for Q1
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LESSON #36
GET AN ACCOUNTANT WHO
UNDERSTANDS THE NATURE OF YOUR
BUSINESS
I fired my accountant and I wish I had done it sooner. Right from the get-go I
knew she wasn’t the right fit, but because she was the first accountant I spoke
to (and because she was my boyfriends accountant), I felt like I HAD to go with
her.
Truth is, she didn’t understand my business model at all. I also would leave our
meetings feeling confused as ever. And guess what? I blamed MYSELF for
this. I thought that it was normal I didn’t understand accounting language. I
felt like I could trust the expert and that it was my fault I couldn’t catch on fast
enough.
THAT’S NOT OKAY.
The experts you surround yourself with should make you feel like you
understand your business better than ever. If your accountant, lawyer, or
whoever, is not patient enough to make things CLEARER for you – get a new
expert. The moment I switched to a new accountant that actually spoke my
language and has the patience to walk me through MY business and help ME
understand it... it was life changing.
Remember: this is YOUR business. It’s your responsibility to understand
what is going on.
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LESSON #37
DON’T STEAL OTHER PEOPLE’S TERMS
AND CONDITIONS
One of the most embarrassing things I ever did is that I stole from another
coach.
I was just starting my business and I was building my website. I didn’t have
enough money to justify hiring someone to do my contracts, so I took another
coach’s terms and conditions and privacy policy, copied it, and pasted it as my
own without thinking too much of it. I tweaked a couple things, and I thought
it’d be okay.
IT WAS NOT.
Months later I was slammed with an email from that coach’s team, telling me to
take down the contracts from my page or else their lawyers would be
contacted because what I essentially did was copyright infringement and theft
of intellectual property. It scared the DAYLIGHTS out of me.
Luckily, I took it down, apologized, and they never contacted me again. To this
day, I still feel the shame and I’m scared that coach will expose me. But at the
same time, I’m thankful I got caught when I was still in the beginning stages so
I could learn from that lesson.
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LESSON #38
TAKE PICTURES OF YOUR RECEIPTS THE
MOMENT YOU GET THEM
When tax season comes around, you will absolutely hate yourself of why
you didn’t keep track of your receipts as you got them. I spent a whole week
trying to find all my receipts to submit for tax purposes. It was stressful and it
was awful. Do yourself a favor and take photos of your receipts, save
them on the cloud somewhere in your phone, and make it a habit. It is
NOT worth wasting a whole week of your time to find everything and rush it
at the end.
LESSON #39
DON’T START SPENDING LIKE CRAZY
JUST BECAUSE YOU HAD A BIG CASH
INJECTION
When I made nearly $200,000 during my first course launch I was OVER THE
MOON. Then I went on a total spending spree. I didn’t even look at the price
when I went to go eat or shop. I paid for my friends meals. I went crazy
traveling. I bought lots of new Youtube equipment. I expanded my team. I
hired an agency to make my website. I invested in more programs, more
software. I bought new clothes. … And then months later I realize I had pretty
much spent almost 100K of expenses. WTF. Then I went full PANIC mode
and it affected my mindset when it came to operating my business. I was
back to having a scarcity mindset.
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I wish I had paced my spending. I wish that I was more careful of my
investments. I wish the FIRST thing I did was take that cash injection and
put a portion of it LOCKED AWAY to pay my taxes and to save in general.
Making money is FUN, and when you see more money you’ve ever seen in
your life (whether it’s 1,000, 5,000, 10,000, or 100,000)… it REALLY doesn’t
mean you should blow all of it. Be responsible with your money.
LESSON #40
DON’T GO TO A LAWYER TO
INCORPORATE YOUR BUSINESS BEFORE
SEEING AN ACCOUNTANT
This was a mistake I made where I thought the best thing to do was to go
to a lawyer directly to get my business papers done. I learned after that,
that my lawyer had actually set up my documents wrong, and my
accountant gave me A LOT of sh*t for it.
I then had to pay extra to fix the mistakes. This could have easily been
avoided if I talked to an accountant first, had a clear conversation of
what business structure would be best for me, and then CONNECT the
accountant and lawyer to work on the documents TOGETHER. THIS is
how it should be.
New for Q1
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LESSON #41
DON’T PAY FOR A CUSTOM WEBSITE
UNTIL YOU 100% KNOW YOUR BUSINESS
DIRECTION AND YOU’RE MAKING MAD
MOOLAH
I paid for a custom website and I don’t regret it... but I wish I did it a little later in
my business. I think I jumped the gun way too early. The custom website and
branding costed over 10K and it was an amazing process. BUT, I wish I had
waited a little longer when I was 500% sure of my business direction and
my positioning.
You see, when you have a custom website, you’ll need to contact the agency
for any major changes. Small changes are OK.. But major changes you’ll likely
need to pay for those edits.
That’s why it’s so important that you DIY your website until you’re literally
making BANK in your business, you have products that for sure you want to
offer for a very long time, and you have a specific positioning that you’re
settled on. Being agile is key in your first few years of business when you’re
still tweaking things and figuring out who the heck you even are as an
entrepreneur!
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LESSON #42
LAUNCH A GROUP COACHING
PROGRAM BEFORE YOU LAUNCH
A FULL BLOWN COURSE
Creating courses are great because of the passive income potential, but
the BEST way and most EFFICIENT way to do it is to launch an intimate
group coaching program first so you can keep your students accountable
and ensure you can be flexible and meet their needs... THEN take the
content and REPACKAGE it to a course that you SCALE.
This is THE MOST efficient way to secure the success of your course
launch because by then, you’ll have killer testimonials from the group
coaching program, and through the group coaching program, because it’s
more intimate, you’ll be able to collect TONS of feedback to make your
course even better.
LESSON #43
HIRE PEOPLE WHO KNOW MORE THAN
YOU DO
There is a difference between hiring people that you LIKE and have a fun
time with vs. Hiring people that truly know more than you do. The purpose
of outsourcing is to give more time BACK TO YOU.
If you’ve hired someone and you’re STILL doing a lot of the work, meaning
you still need to tell them what to do, check over their work, train them in
depth... then you’re really not truly outsourcing. When you
hire people who know MORE than you, that’s when you’ll truly see
business growth because they can see things that you don’t.
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They can offer solutions you’ve never thought of. They can teach
YOU new things. That’s why, in your business, it’s never good to be the
only smartest person in the room. Surround yourself with a team that fill the
strengths you don’t have and that can truly help you put parts of your
business on auto pilot.
LESSON #44
HAVE CLEAR CONTRACTS. FOR
EVERYTHING.
Don’t cheap out on contracts. I know it’s very tempting to... but promise me
that when you make your first sale, reinvest it back into getting contracts.
Protect yourself legally and protect yourself from liability. The worse
thing that can happen is getting into legal trouble that will now cost you
thousands of legal fees to fix when you could have spent $500 on getting a
custom contract done by a professional. This is SO important especially as
coaches working with strangers on the internet. You NEVER know who
you’re working with and you REALLY owe it to your business to protect
YOURSELF.
New for Q1
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BUSINESS RELATIONSHIPS
This section of the handbook talks about just some things that stood out to
me when it comes to relationship building, some really key lessons I’ve
observed or learned. To be honest, these were just some lessons that
seemed a bit miscellaneous, which is why there are very few. Nevertheless, I
hope you’ll take at least one a-ha moment from it!
LESSON #45
DON’T GLORIFY YOUR IDOLS. THEY’RE
REACHING OUT FOR A REASON.
Having inspirations and role models is great, but just know as you grow in
business, your idols may be the ones reaching out to YOU for a
collaboration. This is AMAZING!
The one mistake I made though is I was still fangirling when these
opportunities came my way. Because I had idolized these people for so
long, I always lowballed myself and didn’t think about what was best for MY
business. Remember, when your role models reach out to you likely it’s
because there’s something in it for them. They want to tap into your
audience.
And that’s fine (if it makes sense for you). BUT just remember to also
recognize you’re on an even playing field now and you shouldn’t make
yourself smaller just to make more space for your “role model”. You’re
growing. You’re winning. And people are noticing. Remember that just
because you’re newer in the game, doesn’t mean you deserve less.
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LESSON #46
DON’T COLLABORATE WITH EVERYONE
Now you might be wondering where my last point was coming from.
Clearly, I had a bad experience with collaboration which is why I’m
warning you now. Here’s the story. When I was starting to see accelerated
growth my both my Instagram® and Youtube channel, another coach
reached out to collab. I couldn’t believe my eyes. This person was
someone I had looked up to as inspiration for a while, and they had a
bigger following than me. I was ESTATIC!
Then when we started actually discussing the collaboration, it felt like I was
doing all the work, coming up with the concepts. Not to mention, they
didn’t really bother to start a friendship with me AND they strategically
chose a platform that would benefit THEM the most, not me.
It was super transactional. After I came up with the concepts, they would
later take credit for some key ideas that I came up with. Not cool. But
because I was the “rookie” in this situation, I said nothing... I was just
“grateful” for the opportunity.
After we shared our collab, they proceeded to poach my audience. They
would DM people from my community and tell them that they're my
“friend” and that they had an amazing program they wanted to share.
HOW DO I KNOW THIS?
Well... when you have a loyal community, they’ll tell you when shady sh*t
is happening. Not only this, this person proceeded to join my Facebook
group and pitch their freebies. .
New for Q1
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As you can see, I absolutely regretted this collaboration because there was
zero friendship in it at all. She saw an opportunity, and she took it. This is
why I am VERY careful with collaborations now, and I make sure there
is a FRIENDSHIP first.
I make sure I know who they are as a PERSON. Someone that I TRUST who
won’t lowball my business like that. Someone that I KNOW there will be a
MUTUAL benefit. Anyways Boss, learn from my mistake and always choose
your collaboration offers wisely, even if it’s from your “idols”
LESSON #47
CREDIT YOUR MENTORS
Something that will bring great karma back to you is to credit your mentors.
I’ve worked with some clients and students who share the things they’ve
learned from me without crediting me or mentioning that I was their
mentor at all. I am not expecting everyone to do a university level citation
of where they got their information from, but at least sharing who are your
mentors are or doing the occasional shout out can do WONDERS for
strengthening the relationship.
I mean, imagine if you spent MONTHS helping your clients and students,
only to see them on Instagram® teaching the exact same concepts they
learned from you, without EVER mentioning that you were a part of their
journey at all!?
New for Q1
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I have a feeling most of you would low-key feel a little annoyed too! For
example, I am not shy to say I’ve taken Sunny Lenarduzzi’s Youtube For
Bosses course, Erin May Henry was my first 1:1 business coach, and that I’ve
taken Caitlin Bacher's group coaching SCALE with Success program,
amongst so many other mentors (paid or free) that I’ve learned so much from.
WHY?
Because it’s important that they KNOW I value their relationship and the
support they’ve given me through their programs and content. I’ve seen
people outright take full credit for the things OTHER people taught them,
NEVER once mentioning in their entire journey who their mentors are because
they’re afraid it will seem like they aren’t the real expert... and truthfully, it
leaves a very bad taste in my mouth. It’s not that you SHOULDN’T share the
things you learned. It’s about acknowledging you didn’t get to where you
are alone.
This is why I can’t imagine doing the same thing to MY mentors who’ve
helped ME so much along my journey. Again, it’s not to say you need to
credit your mentors for every single thing you say. Heck, I don’t do this
because that’s just ridiculous and the internet is a vast space. But don’t
HIDE the mentors who’ve truly made a significant impact on my journey
and don’t go all “secret mode” on who you've learned from because that’s
just not cool!
New for Q1
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LESSON #48
RECOGNIZE WHEN YOU’VE OUTGROWN
YOUR SUPPORT SYSTEM
Something I learned is to understand that success can make people feel
uncomfortable. When I started my journey I had (and still have) a support
system of friends and we were all starting our journey together. We all
helped each other and supported each other through every win or failure as
we started our businesses. Overtime, my business grew immensely, yet I was
still leaning on this support system for advice.
Truth is, the advice was in good nature, but it was harmful. These people
no longer understood where I was coming from because I was further
ahead, and therefore their advice was keeping me small.
Let me illustrate some extreme examples: When I DID share a win,
sometimes it would be met with “Ugh. You’re so LUCKY. How come I don’t
have XYZ.” OR if I came with a failure or a problem, I would be met with
“That’s not even THAT bad. AT LEAST you’re making money.” You see, it
wasn’t helpful and it was really keeping me stuck and discouraged.
I felt BAD for sharing my wins, and I felt EVEN WORSE sharing my struggles
because I didn’t want to seem ungrateful for having a successful business. I
learned that while I value every single person that has helped me on my
journey, it’s also important to know when you’re ready to level up.
In my case, what I REALLY needed was to invest in a higher-level
coaching program with people who were more experienced than me
that could give me perspective. This doesn’t mean that my old support
group is less-than. Absolutely NOT. In fact, I still lean on them for emotional
support. BUT I recognize where I’m at and when
I NEED
New for
Q1 to level up. It is
nothing personal.
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That’s why, if you’re in a situation where you’re not getting the help you
need, don’t feel like YOU did something wrong. Loneliness on your
journey is a choice. Recognize what you’ve outgrown, thank the people
who helped get you to where you are, and continuously cultivate
relationships that can help you thrive and go next level..
LESSON #49
ACKNOWLEDGE THE FRIENDSHIP BUCKETS
What does this mean? As you grow in your business or even as you step
outside of your comfort zone to start your business, understand that
not EVERYONE in your life is going to be as interested in your business
as you. This can be a hard pill to swallow considering for many of us, our
business is essentially our babies.
I know there’s a lot of advice out there telling you to cut the people who
don’t support you and to immediately categorize these people as
“toxic”... but the truth is, you just gotta re-evaluate your expectations of
other people.
I realized overtime it wasn’t fair for me to expect that everyone would be
interested in talking about business, especially my friends and loved ones
that DON’T have businesses. For a while, I assumed that they just weren’t
supportive. BUT THEN, I realized that was very selfish of me.
WHY?
Because I’M not asking them questions or talking with them all the time
about their 9-5 jobs or their nursing careers or their real estate careers.
Does this mean I’m not supportive of them? Heck no! It basically means I
don’t know ENOUGH about their industries to sustain a deep
conversation.
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The SAME way THEY likely don’t know enough to talk to me in depth
about business like my other business friends. This doesn’t mean we love
each other less. That’s why I learned that some friends belong in different
buckets. You’ve got your party friends, your business friends, your spiritual
friends, your high school friends... the list goes on.
Once I recognized this, I stopped getting offended and jumping into
conclusions that my friends weren’t supportive and I stopped expecting
the world from them when it comes to my business. When you make
clear separations and acknowledge that you can’t expect ALL your
friends to get EVERY aspect of your business... I promise your
relationships will become much healthier and YOU will become more
mature when it comes to handling relationships while you’re experiencing
massively uncomfortable, yet rewarding, growth!
LESSON #50
LEARN FROM MORE MENTORS
When I first hired my business coach, I was convinced I would be learning
from her forever. I thought that all I needed to do was follow ONE person
for the rest of my business journey. BOY was I wrong!
There are SO many mentors out there with such a vast variety of skill
and style that you would be absolutely robbing yourself of many
growth opportunities if you just stick to learning from ONE person and
one person only. I’ve learned from so many different people in the form of
1:1 coaching, group coaching, and courses, and each experience has
helped shape the entrepreneur that I am today.
One of my favourite things is when my mentors gave conflicting advice.
Mentor A was telling me to do ABC... while Mentor
would tell me the
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exact opposite!
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At first, it would be frustrating because I would end up being hyper confused...
but now I’ve learned to appreciate conflicting advice because it forces ME to
make a DECISION on the path I WANT TO TAKE with ALL THE DATA I have.
From working with various mentors whether closely or from a far, my
biggest takeaway is that there are 101 ways to make money.
There are SO MANY PATHS to take when it comes to success. The most
liberating thing is to know that there IS NO ONE STRAIGHT LINE. When you
start learning from more people, the sooner you realize this and the sooner
YOU will be empowered to pave your OWN path to success and make YOUR
mark in the industry. Don’t confine yourself to a box and ALWAYS stay
humble enough on your journey to know there is so much more to learn.
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FINAL WORDS
You made it to the end! If you liked reading this handbook, please TAG ME
@vanessalau.co on Instagram® stories so I can repost you enjoying these
lessons I just shared. I’ve learned A LOT in my first year of business and these
were the TOP 50 that spoke to me the most and have also helped my own
students in The BOSSGRAM Academy program as well. I have a feeling you
probably found AT MINIMUM 5 things that will change the way you do
business now and in the future.
Remember, these are MY lessons. The ONLY way I was able to come up with
a lot of these is due to MISTAKES I made and EXPERIENCE. You cannot get
experience if you are someone who avoids making mistakes and doesn’t take
any action at all. That’s why, I want to encourage you to make your OWN
mistakes, and hey, maybe in a few months or in a year from now, YOU’LL be
sharing your 50 lessons to someone else in your community, just like I have.
If you want to still stay connected, make sure to follow me on Instagram®
where I share all of my candid moments @vanessalau.co and/or subscribe to
my channel on Youtube www.youtube.com/vanessalau for even more
lessons that I share on social media, coaching, and entrepreneurship.
Good luck on your journey, Boss!
Vanessa
Vanessa Lau
Founder of The BOSSGRAM Academy®
© VANESSA LAU INTERNATIONAL INC. | ALL RIGHTS RESERVED