I am giving myself permission...
..to aim higher
...to want more
...to stop hiding
...to admit something is missing
...to say what I truly want
...to stumble
...to fall, many times
...to get up, again and again
...to fall short of my own high expectations
...to exceed my expectations
...to confront my weaknesses
...to admit I am human
...to learn from my mistakes
...to not have all the answers
...to give others the answers they need, when they are ready to listen
...to acknowledge my strengths
...to be kind, even when it’s hard to do so
...to not worry about what others think
...to let go of elements of my life that aren’t working
...to be unapologetically me (and to be okay with that)
...and, yes, to make a greater positive impact than I ever imagined was possible
Copyright 2018 Bruce Kasanoff and Amy Blaschka. All rights reserved.
An earlier version of these words appeared in our first book together,​ I Am​. They address a
universal need among human beings for meaning and purpose. They also express the
complicated nature of being an individual.
You are capable of achieving so much more than you ever imagined, but you also need the
self-compassion to fall short of your goals sometimes without feeling the need to retreat…
or to berate yourself.
And to add the greatest complication of all, to fulfill your full potential as an individual you
must abandon the false sense of separation from the systems in which you live:
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Family
Community
Neighborhood
Religion
Profession
Work organization
Educational institution
Culture
Ecosystem
Supply chain
Food chain
And so many more
To say that another way, when you come to see yourself as part of a whole that is greater
than you, that is when “you” will truly blossom.
The ideas and impulse we are sharing in these short pages are powerful beyond words.
Our intent is not to fully explain them here, not even close. Even if you choose to come on
a journey with us, it will take weeks, months, or years to grasp the full meaning and impact
of this journey.
We’re not being evasive or mysterious, just honest. Confronting your full potential takes
time, determined effort, openness and grit (i.e., sustained effort towards a long-term goal.)
This little guide has two intentions:
The first is to awaken something in you.
Copyright 2018 Bruce Kasanoff and Amy Blaschka. All rights reserved.
The second is to explain just a tiny bit about Ikigai Park City, the institute we founded to
help people discover their reason for being.
Before we start, a few words of warning…
At first glance, it might be easy to dismiss this tale as a little story about how two writers
met and started working together. That, sadly, would be missing the point. In fact, this is
about abandoning limiting beliefs that hold you as well as us back, and about how we
all—yes, you and us together—can leave behind the notion that we are separate from the
larger whole. The more you tap into goals and possibilities that are larger than you, the
more you can have a positive impact that brings joy to yourself and so many others.
Amy’s Awakening
As a child, I loved to create.
The thought of transforming a blank sheet of paper into a fanciful tale or colorful painting
made me giddy with delight.
And that desire to create—to transform—never left me.
In college, I vacillated between two majors: communications and visual arts, ultimately
earning a degree in film. Working with a group of like-minded folks to bring a story to life
sounded like a dream.
But that dream soon met harsh reality when, shockingly, I couldn’t get a job as a filmmaker
after graduation.
Determined to stay in the creative world, for the next decade, I found myself in what I
would call “agency land,” eager to use my unique skills. And I did, though they weren’t the
ones I had envisioned.
It turns out, my ability to relate and communicate with nearly everyone was super helpful.
I could talk strategy with clients, concepts with designers, and reality checks with the
production team. I rapidly progressed through the ranks of advertising, marketing, and
branding firms.
Copyright 2018 Bruce Kasanoff and Amy Blaschka. All rights reserved.
There was only one problem: it was as “Account Amy,” not “Creative Amy.” I secretly
yearned to be on the creative side but told myself that being in a creative ​industry​ was
enough.
It is hardest to admit what you most want in the world, and so very easy to settle for
something short of that “risky” path.
Funny how we justify things to ourselves, including my next professional move: being
tapped as CEO of a regional destination marketing organization. Ironically, it was those
fantastic interpersonal skills that helped me shine and land me the gig.
Why would I take a job in a brand new industry? (And one that wasn’t considered
creative?) Easy. It was based in the town in which I resided. As the mom of a toddler, I
knew I couldn’t maintain the travel or commute schedule that I had as a branding
consultant. This new role was practical. I had just stayed home with our daughter for
about a year, and I figured this was a way for me to stretch my professional wings, to jump
back in and tackle a new challenge.
Even the crazy circumstances were appealing: the previous CEO had been caught
embezzling from the company, had been turned in by staff, and the organization was at a
make-or-break point. As someone coming from the corporate world where every expense
report had a business reason and associated receipt, I was appalled at the lack of internal
controls of the non-profit. The actions of the former leader surprised her board and
funding cities, which were now threatening to pull their dollars. It was chaos.
Rather than run, I was drawn to it. I saw it as an opportunity to transform and rebuild the
organization, which I spent the next decade successfully doing.
Yes, decade. Funny how you can lose track of time. In that period, I also had our second
daughter (another practical reason to stay where I was, doing what I was doing). I was
Copyright 2018 Bruce Kasanoff and Amy Blaschka. All rights reserved.
well-known in the community and my industry, serving on boards and committees. It was
a very comfortable existence.
Climbing the wrong mountain can feel awfully similar to climbing the mountain you should
be climbing, except when you get to the top you will actually be even further from your
goal.
I’d delight in our annual meetings, where I’d take the opportunity to find a creative way to
share our year-over-year results: through short, animated movies. I made sure that
instead of having my assistant throw my talking points into a PowerPoint, I was the one
creating the magic of bringing our team’s successes to life.
I was throwing “Creative Amy” a bone in the only way I saw possible.
When I left, I created a consultancy to work with similar organizations. As a former CEO, I
held interim leadership roles, performed organization audits, and even contracted with
my state tourism office to serve as an industry relations liaison.
It’s odd, really, that you can build a career doing things you’re good at, gain decades of
experience, receive accolades from clients and colleagues, be paid well and yet still feel...
something is missing.
For years, I kept journals to track my feelings, dreams, and desires. The common thread? I
wanted to be paid to be creative, to express myself, to somehow positively impact others
but didn’t know how.
For inspiration and answers, I wrote and read. In 2015, I came across Bruce Kasanoff on
LinkedIn. His articles instantly and consistently resonated with me and after emailing and
talking with him, I felt I’d found a kindred spirit. He’s supportive, positive, and all about
helping bring out the talent in others.
Copyright 2018 Bruce Kasanoff and Amy Blaschka. All rights reserved.
Bruce encouraged me to keep writing and publishing, telling me that I had a special spark
when I expressed myself authentically. (Note: when a Linkedin Influencer you admire tells
you they like your writing, you listen.)
And then came the observation from Bruce that I knew deep down in my bones but no one
had recognized until that moment: “You’re ​Creative ​Amy​,​ not ​Account ​Amy.”
Bruce’s Awakening
I’ve had a roller coaster career. You’d better hang on tight… I’m going to whip through 40
years of experiences in about three minutes.
Bullied in high school for being a smart, nerdy kid in an all-boys school, I stopped being
smart. My grades plummeted, and I ended up attending UMass/Amherst—at the time a
party school—where my GPA ended up slightly better than atrocious. But five years later,
I got into Wharton and earned an MBA.
Coming out of Wharton, I got a job at Citibank, but… the division shut down almost
immediately and I spent ten months looking for another role.
My new job transformed into an opportunity to travel around the world and launch a new
product line. In just three years, I built a $20 million business and then left to launch a new
company of my own.
But it turns out you need capital to run a business. Who knew? For four years, I tried to
make organic growth work, but I never grew sales over $500,000.
I shut that business down, spent two years at an ad agency, then met bestselling authors
Don Peppers and Martha Rogers—and their fearless company president, Bob Dorf—and
joined their 10-person company. In three years, we grew to 150 people. Along the way, I
gave about 100 paid speeches, plus started and led their training business.
Do you see what I mean by roller coaster? There have been numerous times in my career
in which things looked bleak. So bleak that my friends stopped asking me about work, or
they couldn’t figure out what I actually did.
But throughout this whole ride, I’ve always had this (seemingly irrational) sense that a
bigger destiny awaited me if I could only stop taking these poorly marked detours.
Copyright 2018 Bruce Kasanoff and Amy Blaschka. All rights reserved.
In other words…
Something is missing.
Something bigger, grander, more important. More of a movement, and less of a job. More
inspiring and challenging. More of a team, and less of a lone wolf.
But what?
I had no idea.
Eventually, I convinced myself that ghostwriting was the answer. I’m good at it. Very good.
Being blessed to have a large social media following, new clients found me, instead of the
other way around. The focused nature of this role made it easier to avoid detours and
distractions.
As you just read, in 2015, Amy Blaschka shows up via LinkedIn. We start emailing, then
talking, then collaborating. She’s a kindred spirit, a fellow storyteller, and extremely
supportive.
But every now and then she says, “You are so much more than a ghostwriter.”
Instead of listening to her, I spouted “wisdom” back to her about how I had created this
great life in which I could churn out article after article for others and still manage to ski or
mountain bike most days. I had a system, and it was working.
Except it wasn’t.
It’s ridiculously easy to convince yourself that your practical path represents the best use
of your talents and passion. But easiest doesn’t mean best.
Copyright 2018 Bruce Kasanoff and Amy Blaschka. All rights reserved.
Hang on, the lessons are coming fast and furious right now.
There’s only so much you can do as a lone wolf, and I’ve been a lone wolf (i.e., a writer for
hire) for a very long time. Trying to change simply by shifting around thoughts in your own
head, well, that doesn’t work.
You are heavily influenced by the people around you, or not around you, as well as by
where you live, for whom you work, and so on.
For example, if you want to be fit and trim, it is very difficult to accomplish this goal if your
friends only want to hang out in bars and eat as many hamburgers as humanly possible. I
was pretty healthy already, but when I moved to Park City—a town with 400 miles of
hiking trails that stretch from 6,500’ to 10,000’ above sea level—I lost ten pounds without
ever even having the word “diet” enter my consciousness.
But all by itself, a hiking trail won’t get you out of a rut. Neither will rationalizations or
negative self-talk. (I’ve tried both.)
By the way, I’m betting that your rut is pretty similar to mine: I’ve long had wonderful
clients who are very happy with my work. I make a good living. My friends like me, and vice
versa.
But Amy made me realize, ghostwriting is not my purpose.
What’s your purpose? Do you know?
Copyright 2018 Bruce Kasanoff and Amy Blaschka. All rights reserved.
Interlude
As you are starting to see, we each went decades cycling around our existing beliefs,
attitudes, and habits.
Somehow it happened that as we started to work together, we nudged each other out of
our comfort zones… and dared the other to stop hiding.
This is a critically important confession. Books change very few lives. You need other
people to help you engage in sustained and meaningful change.
For example, in January of this year (2018), we published the book, “I Am.” Taking turns
writing this series of reflections, we established a process that caused both of us to
consistently ponder the words “I am…” and then see what bubbled up. This accidentally
triggered a process that brought each of us closer to who and what we really are meant to
be.
We didn’t plan it that way; it just happened. But afterward, we stopped and realized what
a powerful process that turned out to be.
Amy’s Internal Journey
Getting called out by Bruce was equal parts exhilarating and terrifying.
On the one hand, deep down I always thought of myself as a “creative,” so having another
person truly see me in that way was deeply satisfying.
But if I was indeed “Creative Amy,” I certainly wasn’t acting like it. Sure, I ​talked​ about how
I wanted to be a paid writer, but I was still consulting with my travel industry clients on
operational issues. I’d publish my articles on LinkedIn, but I wasn’t promoting myself as a
writer.
I was being passive, allowing life to happen to me.
Copyright 2018 Bruce Kasanoff and Amy Blaschka. All rights reserved.
I needed to focus my attention on what mattered most to me.
If I wanted real change, I realized, I need to take action rather than remain a spectator.
I needed to live at the intersection of attention and intention, the place where tremendous
growth and learning occur.
I also needed to, ​gulp​, say I was a writer.
Was that easy? Uh, no.
Though inside I felt like I might be, could be, would love to call myself a writer, there were
plenty of other voices to counter that:
● The well-meaning family member who ​had suggested that perhaps I if had a
“marketable major,” (read: non-creative and safe) ​I would have been able to find
fast employment after graduating
● My current colleagues who only knew me as a former CEO in the travel industry
● My anxious self who questioned her creative talent and feared it might be too late
Changing what’s in your head will change the results you get.
Copyright 2018 Bruce Kasanoff and Amy Blaschka. All rights reserved.
Thanks to supportive friends like Bruce, I found the courage to change the story I told
myself..and to the rest of the world. Soon, I was doing what I’d only dreamed about:
getting paid to be creative. Even better, I was using my gift of storytelling to express my
authentic self, which attracted interesting clients, collaborators, and connections.
But it wouldn’t be possible if I hadn’t admitted that something was missing and I wanted
more. Something different than “Account Amy.” Something better aligned with who I truly
was and what I was born to do.
Remember that little girl who loved to create? The one who adored the concept of
transformation? Who had always easily connected and communicated with others, and
wanted to have a positive impact on people?
That’s who I am, and have always been. But I had to reconnect with my true self.
My purpose is to inspire transformation. ​To help others positively change their lives. To
help others find and articulate ​their​ purpose.
It’s what I was born to do.
It took me nearly 50 years to figure it out, but when I finally stepped into and lived my
truth, amazing things started to happen.
Discovering your purpose can be a long journey. It requires a lot of self-awareness,
introspection, and honesty. ​And as Bruce discovered, sometimes your purpose isn't about
you at all.
Bruce’s Internal Journey
Pick a career outcome, and I’ve likely experienced it.
✔ Been fired
✔ Gone a year without pay to launch a company
✔ Raised venture capital
✔ Had my startup go bust
✔ Was paid $10,000 a day to speak
✔ Had a deadly boring job
✔ Considered a leading expert
Copyright 2018 Bruce Kasanoff and Amy Blaschka. All rights reserved.
✔ Considered unimportant and irrelevant
✔ Been hopelessly clueless
✔ Been clear, focused and popular
I could go on, but won’t.
The bottom line is that I know what it’s like to pursue the desire to accomplish more, to
seek greater meaning, to make a larger impact, and to ensure that by the end of my days I
will be proud of my accomplishments.
Over my roller coaster career, I’ve also witnessed many friends and peers get trapped… by
their own negative self-talk, by aiming too low, by taking too few risks, or by simply
accepting the status quo.
But, in recent years, this thought has occurred to me: all my experiences have led up to
this​.
You can’t help someone who has failed unless you, too, have failed.
You can’t help someone keep their ego in check unless you, too, have fallen into the ego
trap.
Life isn’t about finding immediate success. It’s about having a rich set of experiences that
ultimately enrich you and the people around you.
My path is not about my own success. It’s about yours.
My purpose is to help you find your purpose.
My roller coaster ride wasn’t random. It brought me here, to help you, to make your career
and life better.
Or at least that’s the way I choose to see it.
And the lesson that finally linked my world with yours is this one:
Copyright 2018 Bruce Kasanoff and Amy Blaschka. All rights reserved.
More than anything else, my experiences to date—and Amy’s as well—taught us the power
of ​connections​, in every sense of that word.
We are connected by ideas, events, beliefs, and interdependencies.
We are connected in so many ways that it is impossible to count them all.
And—while it might be tempting for some to perceive ourselves as individuals who are
born alone and die alone—connections influence our lives in ways that are both profound
and mysterious.
The ideas in your head weren’t born in your head. You didn’t invent language or
democracy or what’s considered polite behavior or how to educate a child or the rules
that govern commerce.
Like it or not, everything you do and think is influenced by others.
So… when you reach a crossroads and need to decide which direction to head, it makes
sense to acknowledge how connected you are and to benefit from such connections.
Simply stated, to discover your purpose, you need to involve other people.
Copyright 2018 Bruce Kasanoff and Amy Blaschka. All rights reserved.
Your Awakening
What insights will change your life? You may not yet know. You won’t find all your
answers immediately.
If you’ve read this far, you already know something is missing. But for most people,
identifying that ​something​ can be tricky.
The Japanese concept of ikigai says that there are four essential elements that when
present and aligned,
contribute to you feeling
most fulfilled:
— Feeling passionate
about your life and work
— Fully utilizing your
talents
— Understanding what
others need
— Knowing what others
are willing to pay for
When these elements are
balanced, you’re living
your purpose and doing
what you were born to
do. The Japanese would
describe this state as
your ikigai, or “reason for
being.”
But even when only one element is absent, you’ll feel that absence.
Earlier, we talked about all of us joining together on a journey that very well might take
years. Along the way, we will be leaving behind our old selves and our old limiting beliefs.
Yes, “we” means you, too.
Copyright 2018 Bruce Kasanoff and Amy Blaschka. All rights reserved.
Ikigai Park City is meant to be a system in the very best sense of the word: an
ever-growing community of human beings who have made the decision to discover and
remain true to their reason for being. Although it is rooted in this place—our mountain
town nestled high in the Wasatch Mountains of Utah—our community will stretch all
around the world.
As you learned earlier, we each found ourselves climbing the wrong mountain.
Unfortunately, we see too many others doing the same. ​They are working hard, planning
and calculating… but are so involved in the effort that they lose sight of one basic truth:
they don’t actually want to stand on the peak of ​this​ mountain. Their heart lies elsewhere.
If this is true of you, we can guide you on a journey to not only find the right mountain but
also to scale it successfully. Ironically, the most challenging part of this journey is not close
to the summit but rather in the valley between the two mountains. It is here that you will
Copyright 2018 Bruce Kasanoff and Amy Blaschka. All rights reserved.
have to open yourself to your fears, uncertainties, and true ambitions. It is also where you
will begin to immerse yourself in possibilities.
While we offer you a map and our support, there is much that you will have to do. You will
be part of a community that together will overcome obstacles and hardships. You should
be prepared to contribute and to help others. You don’t need to come with answers, but
you do need to come with an open mind and heart.
We hope you will come to the mountains, walk through the forest with us, dare to be
vulnerable, make strong new connections, and discover what you were born to do.
Give yourself permission... to join us. Our retreats start this August and continue
throughout the year.
If you haven’t already, please ​add your name​ ​to our invitation list of people who will
receive notices when we add new programs and events to our schedule.
Copyright 2018 Bruce Kasanoff and Amy Blaschka. All rights reserved.