Old Fashioned Great Debate Group Leader Insights

Old Fashioned Great Debate Group Leader Insights
Why are Christians against Fifty Shades of Grey?
It’s interesting the OLD FASHIONED is coming out at the same time. One movie is
about sex and abuse leading to love, which many people would quickly label fantasy.
Of course, harmful might be a much better label. The other movie is about two people
moving out of abusive pasts, who know that sex alone guarantees nothing relationally.
Is there really hope for old-fashioned, godly romance in today’s culture?
Is OLD FASHIONED just a reaction to Fifty Shades?
OLD FASHIONED was written and produced long before Fifty Shades. But it’s fair to
say the movie is a powerful response to today’s hookup culture that informs Fifty
Shades of Grey.
How would you describe the differences between the movies’ main characters?
In both movies the male lead carries deep and hidden wounds. From there, however,
the storylines part:
• In Fifty Shades, a wealthy man pursues pleasure; in OLD FASHIONED, a
man leaves wealth to pursue truth, in hopes of finding meaning and
• In Fifty Shades, the contract is license for the man to indulge in hurting his
lover. In OLD FASHIONED, the contract (marriage) commits the man to
the woman’s well being.
• In Fifty Shades, a naive young woman succumbs to a man’s mystery and
force; in OLD FASHIONED, a worldly young woman is undone by a man’s
candor and kindness.
• In Fifty Shades, two people explore their dark desires; in OLD FASHIONED,
two people are finding their way out of the dark.
• In Fifty Shades, one man creatively causes pain; in OLD FASHIONED, one
man creatively builds emotional intimacy.
• Fifty Shades idealizes bondage and helplessness; OLD FASHIONED
celebrates mutual freedom.
• Fifty Shades is clearly fantasy. OLD FASHIONED is truly human.
Is it wrong to see Fifty Shades?
Movies help shape culture. Picture a young woman you care about. Does she sit and
eat her popcorn while watching a pretend story of dominance, wealth, power and
emotional weakness? Or is she better off investing two hours watch a couple ditch the
Me-First Romance Rulebook as they opt for godly romance and love?
Why do you think the Fifty Shades book has been so popular?
It likely has a lot to do with basic human longing. OLD FASHIONED says, given that
longing, think past the moment: not all that glitters is love. Some of what excites
ultimately can harm. Mystery can mask real harm … and a relationship with God is the
glue for the long haul.
Will OLD FASHIONED be as successful as Fifty Shades?
In a hookup, me-first culture, OLD FASHIONED is a bold step backward. Some
people will leave the movie encouraged or wistful. Every time OLD FASHIONED—
especially in contrast to a concurrent film about bondage and fantasy—stirs it up for
men and women about what they want from life, from a relationship, it will be a
Old Fashioned Great Debate Group Discussion Questions
1. What possible harm (or gain) could come from watching or reading Fifty
Shades Of Grey?
2. Why do you think Fifty Shades Of Grey is so wildly popular among women—
including Christian women?
3. Do you think some would say the OLD FASHIONED message is naive or
unrealistic? What do you think?
4. What is chivalry and why does it matter? Is it dead? Salvageable? Important?
5. The Fifty Shades Of Grey message of high-thrills/high-risk/quick-sex dating
is one form of “relationships.” Is there an alternative?
6. Is Christian Grey all wrong or bad? Is Clay Walsh all right or good? Why or
why not? In other words, is this black and white or perhaps, is there some
7. What are the dangers or benefits of fantasy, bondage, and pornography?
8. Is all pleasure good? If there’s a difference between good pleasure and bad
pleasure, where is the line? Who decides? And how?
9. Does it really matter whom you date—or are intimate with? If so, why?
10. If you’re looking for a life partner, what’s the best way to get to know
11. What is it in Fifty Shades Of Grey that attracts us? What is it in OLD
FASHIONED that attracts us? Do those things have anything in common?