Retreat Reflections
Spirit Rock Retreat, “Equanimity, Seeing the World with Quiet Eyes”
Talk presented at White Heron Sangha, April 24, 2016
by Carole Maurer
From April 3-10, 2016, I attended a silent meditation retreat at Spirit Rock with teachers Sally
Armstrong and Kamala Masters. Springtime is beautiful at Spirit Rock, which is located in Marin
County on the road to Pt. Reyes. Everything was green this year and the wildflowers were in full
bloom. We woke each day to the sound of turkey gobbles, and the males were showing off
their full regalia for the females every day. In the afternoon, we were treated to families of deer
roaming right next to the walking paths.
I can’t think of a better place to escape from the daily routines of life, even when I already live
in such a magnificent locale. I’ve been to Spirit Rock many times, and again, as I walked up the
path to the registration area, I was completely overwhelmed by the feeling of coming home.
There had been a few incidents in my life recently where I felt out of touch with the sense of
balance and acceptance of the way things are, and I was looking forward to learning more
about equanimity and practicing it intensively. I wasn’t disappointed.
Sally and Kamala alternated leading the morning meditation instructions and the evening
dharma talks. Both are really excellent teachers. They had a lot to present and I got a lot from
each of them. I took some notes during the talks – kind of a no-no, but I knew I was going to
speak about this topic for the Sangha program, so did it anyway.
In Sharon Salzberg’s book Faith there is the following quote: “In order to know the truth of
interconnectedness we need to look at the world with what theologian Howard Thurman calls
‘quiet eyes.’ It might be through silent meditation that we see the hidden patterns of connection
that make up our inner life. It might be through pausing long enough to realize where a plate of
spaghetti comes from. However we do it, softly receiving reality with quiet eyes rather than
pinpointing objects and events as separate and distinct opens up our view instead of enclosing it
with predetermined boundaries. We take in what is appearing before reactions and conclusions
get fixed. When we relax into this mode of perception, a different perspective on reality
becomes available to us.” Kamala Masters was so taken with this quote, she approached Sally
and asked her to co-lead a retreat on equanimity, with the theme being, “Seeing the world with
quiet eyes.”
When we see the world with quiet eyes, we face things as they are, without reactivity. It is a
calm inner quality and inner connection with how things are, not a distant relationship. This is
equanimity. The Dalai Lama called equanimity “immeasurable impartiality.” He said it is the
most powerful and the crown of the Brahma Viharas, the Divine Abodes. It is the evenness of
the mind and heart towards all beings, a resting of the mind before falling into extremes; a
heartfelt connection with spaciousness balance.
For WHS April 24, 2016
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Retreat Reflections
Spirit Rock Retreat, “Equanimity, Seeing the World with Quiet Eyes”
Talk presented at White Heron Sangha, April 24, 2016
It’s hard to be in this world that’s full of disasters, war, distractions, temptations, reactions,
infighting, everything pulling us this way and that. When we take the time to look at our daily
lives, we begin to notice the habitual ways we react to what’s called in Buddhism, the 8
vicissitudes of life: gain and loss, fame and disrepute, praise and blame, pleasure and pain, and
ultimately, our reaction to birth and death. Equanimity is what allows us to see widely, with
spacious balance and “quiet eyes.” Equanimity allows us to rest the mind before it falls into
extremes and leads to a stronger and deeper lovingkindness, so we can meet life more evenly
and move with life as it comes.
On retreat, silence becomes the most appreciated gift we give ourselves. We can be with
experiences directly. When the mind grabs us, we can say, “not now.” It’s actually hard to not
get caught up with our habitual reactions because we mostly prefer the distractions that keep
us from looking deeply. Kamala recommended that we stay away from devices that tend to
encourage the extremes in us. To put away our cell phones and be truly present for all that the
retreat experience offers – pleasant and difficult. I did just that. It wasn’t easy at first but as the
retreat progressed, I didn’t miss that type of “connection” at all.
The challenge is to learn to stay connected with what’s happening in and around us and still be
in balance, to be compassionate. We need equanimity to survive relationships and live in this
world. Equanimity is examining how it is right now – the outer condition and the inner
condition. It’s remembering that all beings have their own journey, even if we don’t know what
it is right now. Equanimity is the ability to hold both sides equally.
Equanimity involves control and power – really believing we can change the future by the way
we respond inside. We make a choice not to get even, not to react quickly, recognizing we have
a freedom to make choices on how we act. We can learn to recognize reactivity or attachment
or aversion in order to get a more truthful connection to what is happening right now. We need
to be clear about what’s going on and respect our own and others’ boundaries.
The opposite of equanimity is reactivity in the form of attachment and aversion. The near
enemy of equanimity is apathy, not being connected to what’s going on – disinterest,
blandness, indifference, “I don’t care – whatever,” aloofness. We may think these states are
equanimity, but they’re really the near enemy, fed by delusion and ignorance and avoidance.
Equanimity is found throughout the Buddha’s teachings and is central to many of the practices.
In addition to the Brahma Viharas, equanimity is woven into the paramis (or paramitas), the
ten perfections that are similar to the noble eight-fold path. They are: generosity, virtue,
wisdom, renunciation, energy, patience, truthfulness, resolve, lovingkindness, and finally,
equanimity. The paramis are central to Mahayana and Tibetan practices and the Bodhisattva
vows, as well as for insight. These paramis are qualities of good human beings and deal with
our everyday lives.
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Retreat Reflections
Spirit Rock Retreat, “Equanimity, Seeing the World with Quiet Eyes”
Talk presented at White Heron Sangha, April 24, 2016
Kamala mentioned that Ledi Sayadaw (a 19th century Theravadan monk) said that “Patience
and equanimity are the mainstay for the perfections. Only when one has set oneself up in these
two can one expect to fulfill the rest." Patience and equanimity are intertwined and support
each other: if we are patient, we are developing equanimity, and vice versa. Both are necessary
for our meditation practice and bring peace and calm into our minds and hearts. They are the
keys to achieving all the others. Patience is essential for mindfulness. Equanimity allows us to
stay with the ebb and flow of existence. Equanimity and calm are the natural states of the
mind; everything else is added on.
Renunciation is also part of equanimity, renouncing the need to be in control; renouncing the
need to hold the only correct views and opinions; renouncing the need to be right.
And, equanimity underlies and supports both mindfulness and metta. For Samma Sati, Right
Mindfulness, to develop, equanimity needs to function to keep us connected with experiences
even when they are difficult or challenging, to deepen insight into the true nature of reality.
True mindfulness is knowing what’s happening and knowing that we’re knowing – the wisdom
piece – samma (wise); it’s seeing clearly and is the nonjudgmental part of mindfulness. It’s a bit
circular, but mindful attention is what allows us to deepen into equanimity. Then, the mind is
kind, interested, and relaxed, paying attention to everything using the mind/body/heart.
Vipassana, or wisdom practice, develops fluidity around awareness of the present. Vipassana
asks us to rest in the not knowing. We’re told to not get caught in thoughts and emotions – so
when we’re practicing mindfulness, there is an actual shift in the heart, and that’s equanimity.
Vipassana steadies us; equanimity balances us. Interestingly, Kamala said that the end of
vipassana is equanimity, not happiness. It’s really equanimity that we’re trying to reach with all
the forms of practice, and it’s said that equanimity is necessary for reaching enlightenment.
Equanimity has been referred to as the doorway to liberation. That’s why it’s so important to
incline the mind toward equanimity through both the Brahma Vihara practice and the wisdom
practice of vipassana.
Kamala told about a meeting she had with the teacher U Pandita, where he spoke of the five
spiritual balancing factors of equanimity that are included in the factors of enlightenment.
These five factors are:
Faith – being here now, confidence in the here and now, balances tendencies to doubt
the truth
Energy – balance brings about mindful awareness, helps to control laziness
Mindfulness – remembering to be mindful; like a mirror, seeing things as they really are
Concentration – balance that steadies and unifies the mind, the stabilizing factor
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Retreat Reflections
Spirit Rock Retreat, “Equanimity, Seeing the World with Quiet Eyes”
Talk presented at White Heron Sangha, April 24, 2016
Wisdom – balances ignorance and knowledge
U Pandita’s story goes something like: “equanimity is like a chariot being pulled by five horses.
In the lead is mindful awareness, behind are the first pair of horses, faith and wisdom, and
behind them, the second pair of horses, energy and concentration. When faith and wisdom are
in balance, and concentration and energy are in balance, the lead horse has little work.”
Through practice we learn to keep all of these in balance; that’s the power of equanimity.
Most of us are familiar with equanimity as the 4th Brahma Vihara, upekkha in Pali. The other
Brahma Viharas are metta (lovingkindness), karuna (compassion), and mudita (sympathetic
joy). Equanimity is contained in the other three Brahma Viharas. It’s equanimity that allows us
to hold joy and sorrow in balance and spaciousness. Sylvia Boorstein reminds us that it’s
equanimity that allows us to have and keep a clear mind and open heart.
Lovingkindness is the basis for equanimity practice as a Brahma Vihara. We repeat phrases of
lovingkindness to incline the mind – creating a groove for lovingkindness. Actually, It’s always
helpful to begin all Brahma Vihara practices with lovingkindness to open the heart.
Acceptance is the beginning of kindness. Liking is not part of metta. Metta is accepting all.
Equanimity needs to be connected to metta and is the suffusion of metta, karuna, and mudita.
We end up living in a sea of kindness. With true equanimity, we embrace all living beings with
impartiality.
Sally talked about the two main aspects of equanimity when practicing it as a Brahma Vihara:
first, a balanced, spacious mind, which is a mental factor we can know and cultivate. We can
actually recognize a mind in balance and can cultivate it. Nature often offers us this
opportunity. We can gaze at the skies and contemplate infinity and the vastness of time. Doing
this stops the mind for awhile and balances the obsessive mind that’s all about me. She guided
us in the Big Mind meditation, with the sound of bells that ring randomly, to help us see into
and experience the vastness and spaciousness of the mind. The Big Mind holds everything.
The second aspect of equanimity is an understanding of the nature of reality, known in
Buddhist teachings as the dhamma, or truth, which is expressed in the teachings on kamma
(karma in Sanskrit.) Kamma simply means action, and refers to the universal laws of cause and
effect and conditionality. In this teaching, the Buddha highlighted the importance of intentions
in our actions. We come to understand that our lives are shaped by our choices, and the
importance of bringing mindfulness and wisdom to our choices and intentions. We also should
be aware that, even with good intentions, our actions can have harmful impacts, especially as
we live, work and practice in communities with people with different cultural, racial, economic,
gender identifications, sexual orientations, or other diverse experiences.
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Retreat Reflections
Spirit Rock Retreat, “Equanimity, Seeing the World with Quiet Eyes”
Talk presented at White Heron Sangha, April 24, 2016
Equanimity allows us to align with the dharma, to see the way things are, and to see the role
karma plays in our lives. In equanimity practice, we’re not looking to transform anyone’s
actions. We don’t send equanimity out. We’re developing the equanimity, the balance within
ourselves, with being with what is and with what is arising out of conditions and actions.
Through equanimity, we begin to experience and understand the 12 steps of dependent
origination. And through that equanimity and understanding, we can shape our karma.
Equanimity meditation practice often begins with mindfulness practice of breathing, sitting
here, being grounded. Then, we ask ourselves what will help us meet each moment fully?
Maybe using the phrase, “May I meet each moment with kindness.” Then, metta practice, at
least for oneself, often follows before beginning the equanimity phrases.
Traditional metta practice follows the sequence of lovingkindness for oneself, a benefactor and
a loved one, a neutral person, a difficult person, and all beings. We need deep metta, at least
for ourselves, and preferably, for all beings, in order to move into true equanimity.
Interestingly, equanimity meditation begins with the neutral person, because it’s often easier to
have equanimity for a neutral person. Then we incline the mind and heart towards equanimity
for a benefactor, then, a friend, a difficult person, oneself, and finally all beings.
Formal equanimity practice is a two-step process. We learn to see what’s going on in the other
(outer condition – externally around us) and then what’s going on in me (inner condition – how
what’s going on in the body and what’s in the mind). Often, in meditation, the hindrances take
the form of wanting something different from what they are at the moment. Equanimity is the
antidote to the hindrances, really noticing what’s happening right now and not radiating
anything outward or trying to change what’s happening through aversion or greed. We’ll do a
meditation on equanimity for a few minutes at the end of my talk.
As the retreat progressed, Sally and Kamala went deeper into the nature of equanimity.
Equanimity is wisdom that comes before action: we look first to see what’s there in the
body/mind: attachment, aversion, indignation, etc. And then, we take the next step. Equanimity
is the balance between energy and ease. We need to look at the body (inner) and it will be the
mirror to our mental state.
We explored using equanimity in our daily lives as a practice. It’s important to remember that
we must gain confidence in really noticing and being with the way things are before trying to fix
relationships or a situation. When we can achieve equanimity, we see the doorway to the
cosmos and get a sense of the vastness of life and space. Equanimity is the holding in balance
the arising and passing away of all things.
(note: I was really sick on the 4th full day. Hadn’t slept, and coughed all the time – runny nose,
chills, shaking. Practiced equanimity: this is what shaking is; this is what fever is; are there steps
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Retreat Reflections
Spirit Rock Retreat, “Equanimity, Seeing the World with Quiet Eyes”
Talk presented at White Heron Sangha, April 24, 2016
to alleviate this condition right now? Complaining makes it worse – 2nd arrow! Practice metta
for myself.)
We ended the retreat with equanimity meditation practice, with focus on the second aspect of
equanimity, the karmic nature of all things. Let’s do this now.
(End with Meditation on Equanimity and Peace)
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