Instructor Notes for Peer Review
The use of peer critique mirrors how people in the real world actually write. Business people
circulate reports to get feedback from coworkers; scientists and academics routinely collaborate
when they write, too. Your classmates can be quite helpful as you write the early drafts of your
essay, providing suggestions that can guide you through the revision process. In addition, they
can respond to questions that you may have about your essay—for example, whether your
introduction works or whether one of your supporting points needs more explanation. When you
are asked to peer review a colleague’s work, the following guidelines will help you:
Be positive. Remember that your purpose is to help other students improve their essays.
Be tactful. Be sure to emphasize the good points about the essay. Mention one or two things the
writer has done particularly well before you offer your suggestions.
Be specific. Offer concrete suggestions about what the writer could do better. Vague words like
good or bad provide little help.
Be involved. Ask questions, explain your comments, and listen to any replies the writer gives to
you.
Look at the big picture. Focus first on the clarity of the thesis statement, the effectiveness of the
support, and the organization of the writer’s ideas at this stage. While the spelling and
punctuation can’t be expected to be perfect at this stage (it’s just a rough draft), you can mark
what you see as a second-level priority.
Be thorough. You will write down and explain your comments in-text in the form of bolded
responses in brackets, inside the text of the draft that your peers post. You will also write a brief
note at the bottom summarizing your recommendations for improving the paper.
When Peer Review Helps:
- When you ask what the writer wants help with
- When you make notes in the text and at the end
- When you use the assignment sheet as a guide to offer feedback
- When you stick to business
- When you ask a few pointed questions
When Peer Review Doesn’t Help:
- When you makes broad judgments only: “This is really great. Really really great.”
- When you tell the writer what should be in the piece rather than tell them about your
experience as a reader: (i.e., Statements like “I get lost here” or “This is confusing” is enough—
you don’t have to fix the paper for them.)
- When you don’t stick to business
Here is a sample student first draft, with peer review comments from one colleague inserted in
brackets and in bold, just like you will place in the drafts of those first drafts you review in your
peer response groups. Notice the language this peer reviewer uses—she is very focused on
describing her own experience as a reader; she does not tell the writer how to fix problems but
merely offers suggestions; she offers a nice mix of responses about content, meaning, and ideas
with those about grammar or language issues; and she sums up her recommendations and
reactions in a brief note at the end.
Learning A New Language
Clear communication is the road to empowerment and from early on in our lives, language is the
vehicle by which travel. [I like the idea behind this sentnce, but it's a bit fuzzy, maybe you
could try rewording it] Up to this point in my life, I have had to learn four languages in order to
succeed as my family immigrated to various countries. Although it has been difficult to put
distance between myself, the people I love, and the places I have grown attached to in life, I
consider myself lucky because [This sentence seems a little long, you could cut out the
because and put in a period] learning English has helped me build confidence in myself at an
age where it was really easy to fall into the criticisms and bullying of others.
When my mom's job moved our family from the cosmopolitan French-speaking city of Montreal
to the suburbs of St. Louis, Missouri in the summer before sixth grade, [.] I was too preoccupied
chasing tadpoles and frogs in the man-made lake nearby, jumping around in the pool with my
little sister, or running around the apartment complex spying on people as a secret detective to
anticipate the first year of middle school that was inevitably approaching. [I love the contrast
between Montreal being cosmopolitan and the St. Louis suburbs] The first few weeks of
school were like a dream because I couldn't speak English and had absolutely no idea what was
going on in my classes. [This blows my mind! I cannot imagine what it was like] Also, sixth
grade generally marks the "awkward" stage for many people and this was certainly the case for
me. Not only was I skinny, lanky, with dominant buck teeth but no braces. [This could
reworded as: not only was I skinny and lanky, I had dominant buck teeth, and I wore
glasses.], I also wore glasses and was apparently the only person in the school who had ever
been out of Missouri. In sixth grade, none of these characteristics work in your favor.
Six months later, I was able to "speak" in English though it was a challenge for others to
understand me. At that age, kids are pretty insecure and can be quite mean but I did not take it
too seriously. I ignored the bullying for the most part, though I do remember one unfortunate
incident. We were in geography class and our teacher, Mr. Click (notorious for his creepy glass
eye) [nice detail] talked about the maple syrup industry of the East coast [you could trade the
and for a period here] and I said I had visited many maple syrup farms in Quebec and my
favorite part was at the end of the tour, when they poured the hot syrup onto the snow and you
could roll it onto your Popsicle stick as it hardened and eat it like a lollipop. Of course, I was
probably not so elaborate about the process and just said something like, "at the end you can eat
maple syrup on a stick". Just then, the freckly short kid I had been silently but madly in love with
for the entire school year blurted out, "Maple syrup on a steak? EWW!" and at that, the entire
class burst into laughter as if that was the funniest comment ever made. I was mortified. Despite
such incidents, I never admitted to any one, not my parents, not even myself, that I was less cool
than the other kids. I tried to remain as oblivious as I could and that year I spent all my free time
absorbed in English books to replace the friends that I did not have.
Towards the end of the year, all the reading was really paying off. I knew a little more English
now and for some strange reason felt it would be appropriate to try out for the school play.
Miraculously, I landed myself a role. I was Tammy, the baby who eats glue while the babysitter
isn't looking and has her mouth glued shut the entire scene. I had no lines [,] but at least I was in
the spotlight for a scene. If I hadn't been inclined to join the play, I may never have met the girl
who became my best friend for years. At play practice I usually practiced my scene with Jenifer,
my sister in the play who informed the babysitter I was eating glue. She could also be called a
social outcast in the sixth grade and the two of us became fast friends. After that first year, my
English improved steadily and I was more and more able to express myself which was great
because I never liked being the "quiet type"!
Today, people are always surprised to find out that I am not a native speaker. I never really
imagined that one day, I would totally pass for an American. I think that turning to books was the
best way that I could empower myself at that age because [This sentence seems a little long,
you could change the because to a period] they distracted me from the bullying which now
seems utterly meaningless while helping me become more familiar with a language I was just
learning to navigate.
I really enjoyed reading your essay. I cannot imagine being dumped into a classroom where
you didn't know the language! You're desriptions are fun, but I would watch out for those
extra long sentences. Think about when the reader might pause. I am curious about what
other languages you know, or countries you've lived in. Perhaps you could find a way to
work some of those details?
Instructions for Peer Response Groups
You will be assigned to one of five Peer Response Groups (A, B, C, D, or E). Once inside your
assigned Peer Response Group, you first task will be to post your entire first draft by cutting and
pasting the text of your final draft into the text box of a new discussion forum post by
Wednesday, October 13 at 9:00 am. [Do not attempt to post your paper as an attachment-- your
colleagues may be working on other browsers or word processing programs and may run into
trouble with compatibility issues.] Title your post with your name and the working title of your
paper.
Your next task will be to select any three of your colleagues’ first drafts for which you will
provide peer review comments. Announce your selections by hitting ‘reply’ to a colleague’s
initial post and typing “Peer Review by ‘Your Name’ forthcoming.” Once a draft has three
promised peer reviews, you need to select another draft to peer review. Be sure you announce
which drafts you are providing forthcoming peer review for-- that way, everyone winds up
with three different readers and everyone's paper gets read. Otherwise, we will wind up with
some papers who have five readers, and some who have none. The goal of the peer review is to
have you review three others’ drafts and to have your draft reviewed by three of your colleagues.
If we work in this organized way up front, every paper should be read three times by three
different people.
You should reply to your selected first drafts with your peer review comments by Friday,
October 15 at 5:00pm. You will provide comments by cutting and pasting the text of your
colleague’s first draft into a word document, inserting your own notes and ideas in bold and in
brackets inside the first draft of your colleague [like this] and writing them a brief note in bold at
the end of their first draft summarizing your reactions and recommendations for improving them
paper. Then you will cut and paste your edited copy of your colleague’s first draft back into a
text box as another ‘reply’ to your colleague’s initial post that offered the first draft. Title your
post “Peer Review by ‘Your Name.’” These comments are due 'early' on Friday night before the
typical Sunday deadline so that you will have time to read the comments you've received and
revise and proofread your paper in time to turn it in on Monday.
Special Notice:
Failing to return comments to your peers by the assigned date and time, or posting a draft but
failing to provide all required comments to your peers in return will simply not be tolerated. If
you commit either of these infractions, you risk failing this assignment and being permanently
kicked out of peer review groups!
Questions that can Guide your Peer Review:
What do you notice about how the writer treated the subject or topic of the essay?
• Is there a thesis statement?
• Has she or he communicated why the memory or event is significant?
• Could something be added? Could something be taken out?
Has the writer achieved the characteristics of good narratives provided in your class notes?
• Have they used a selection of rich, specific details?
• Have they varied their sentence structure?
• Maintained good narrative order?
• Used transitions appropriately?
What do you notice about on the writer’s introduction, organization, and conclusion?
• Are there actual introductory and concluding paragraphs?
• Does each of the body paragraphs have its own major topic or idea?
• Is the paper organized in a way that makes sense?
Are there any issues with the writer’s use of grammar, usage, punctuation, and style that you
notice?
• Has the writer avoided run-on sentences (see Easy Writer 82)?
• Do the verb tenses enable readers to follow the sequence of events (Easy Writer 61-65)?
• Has the writer avoided unnecessary tense shifts (Easy Writer 61-65)?
• If the writer has used dialogue, has she or he punctuated it correctly and capitalized where
necessary (Easy Writer 102-130)?